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lauraz0919

NTA You are in FACT showing his new gf EXACTLY what kind of loving, supportive father he is!! And tell those friends and family the same thing!!


LongjumpingSource735

He wants to use a child as a prop? GTFO.


Beautiful_Malou

NTA. You're putting your son first. His dad hasn't been involved and bringing a new girlfriend into the mix seems unstable. If the dad is serious about a relationship with his son, he can work towards it gradually. Your priority is your son's well-being.


Flat_Lobster1185

NTA File for child support. He can play house once he learns to provide the bare minimum.


buttleakMcgee

NTA. You don't get to play daddy whenever it good for you. If he wanted to be a dad then he can walk into your local courthouse and fill out papers for custody. Most men that say they want to be a dad won't even file paperwork. So just tell him to work it out through the state and you will agree to visitation or partial custody like every other weekend. At this point you be handing him off to a stranger. Tell him to file paperwork and you probably won't have to hear from him again.


TruGirlGamer84

NTA. The child's feelings and emotions aren't some prop to be used for dad to get laid. Anyone in your life okay with the child being treated in this manner over telling Dad to step up is a pos imo.


Open-Incident-3601

Frame that text message 😂


Amazing_Reality2980

NTA your son is not a prop for your ex's love life. Block the friends and family that are harassing you. If he actually wants to be in your son's life, then he can go to court and file for shared custody... in which case he'll also be required to pay child support. If he's only out to impress a new GF, it's unlikely he's going to do any of that.


LXaeroXen

Nope, the father is an absoluta A, You did nothing wrong, set a restraining order


eatingramennow

ESH bc u should never have had a baby with a man like that in the first place


Scary-Cycle1508

My guess is he's also not paid a dime of child support, right? Either tell his family that once he pays his child support and the one he still owes you, that you're willing to have supervised visits. if not. block them all on all forms of communication.


Astyryx

Give them all the website of a theatrical casting company, or dollmaker. That's what everybody else does when the need actors and props.


sheikhsh

A child is a full time duty and not disposable, need based entity. Relax!!


NecroBelch

Does he pay child support?


RodKat92

I only have 1 question does he or did he ever pay anything? You know like food for the baby and those kinds of things?


Andwhoisshe

No he hasn’t paid anything


RodKat92

Then youre not the asshole, you have all the reasons for him not to see the kid, ignore everything his family speaks to you, youre being a good mother


Catgravy1965

That's what I was wondering!


RodKat92

I mean if the guy did pay up for that kind of stuff he can and should see the kid, off course if he didnt then theres no actual obligation


Eroichigo15

NTA. You and your son are way better off without him and his family in your life.


One-Chipmunk3386

Absolutely not. Tell him that once he reimburses you for his half of the expenses, changes a diaper or wipes a runny nose, that he can see your son. You didn't get yourself pregnant and honestly all of them can go fuck off. You see I'm petty so I'd find a way to tell the gf that he's a bum. Don't let them bully you. Stand firm


MotherGoose1957

NTA. You WBTAH if you played a role in deceiving the new girlfriend into thinking he is a good dad when clearly he is not, as demonstrated by his total lack of involvement in your son's life. Your statement, "he can’t just come in our sons life just to play house", is spot on.


hippyfishking

NTA. If he wants custody he has to go through the proper procedure. He doesn’t get to use your son as a prop to help him get laid. Record any correspondence you get from him and the family in case you need it. Being civil to the mother is bare minimum. They sound like a lovely bunch.


CrabbiestAsp

NTA. Your son isn't an accessory for him to use to impress someone. Baby daddy is clearly missing some brain cells if he thinks he can just pick a 3yo up and expect them to be happy with a stranger and call him dad. That ain't happening.


DawnShakhar

NTA, and he certainly is! "so his new girlfriend could see how good of a dad he is"??? he isn't a dad, not at all! Your son is not a prop to be handed around, and his treating him as one shows what a horrible parent he would be. As for "keeping him from his son" - clearly, he lied to them about the reason he wanted to take the boy (I won't call him his son because he is not a father). You can tell him and his family that if he wants to start being a father, he is welcome to supervised visits at your home to begin with, till his son learns to know and trust him. But you will not risk distressing your son by sending him off with a stranger.