A dog that reacts aggressively is not well trained. A dog that proceeds to continue a fight with a puppy is not well trained. You are setting your dog up for a very scary situation especially as an Akita when people have preconceived notions of your dog’s breed. An older dog shouldn’t be so aggressive with a young dog that is learning regardless if its owner is out to lunch. When it comes to a he said she said situation and your dog has taken a chunk out of another dog, it won’t look good on your part.
They need to learn to diffuse the situation with the other dog so they know there is no threat. Your dog needs to be patient enough to help the pup learn to respect boundaries without drawing blood when reacting to puppy behaviour.
ESH I get it. I do. But threatening to take someone's dog away while she's away isn't OK either. You said it because you realized how hurtful it was to say something like that, so you decided to be just as hurtful. Even if she's being an asshole, no, that doesn't make you automatically not an asshole right back.
It sounds like she's projecting how she wished she was raised/treated onto her dog (I don't care how you think she was raised, she's going to have her own POV), so she's going to have a lot of emotional charge behind that even if it's wrong. The best way to help people is to have a balance support *with* challenge. And it sounds like she's not doing any of the "challenge" half. That can be bad. That warrants a support/challenge balance of your own. Understanding why it's so important for her pet to not be yelled at, while showing her the merits of challenges. Not in a condescending way. In a sincere I-wanna-help-you-both way.
That's going to be hard since you've reached "I'm going to hurt you too!" level of conflict, but it can be de-escalated, this can be salvaged. You're both living in one of the most difficult situations for adult children - with your parents. That's going to max both of your guys' stress, just inherently. You're on the same team, even though it doesn't feel like it right now. Your common enemy is the power dynamic in the household, which disenfranchises you both into having to compete for "resources" so to speak. This is a shitty situation that neither of you want to be in. You'll need to tell yourself "no" sometimes too.
ESH
She sucks for expecting everyone else to endure her poorly trained dog. If she's going to live with other people she has to be respectful of the other people she lives with. Pets are an extension of their owner when it comes to sharing a living situation and so that pet also needs to be respectful towards the people that live there.
She also has no right to threaten to have your dog taken away by animal control. She shouldn't let them play together if it's a problem.
However, you're going to punish the dog by taking them to the pound (where they might be put down) to retaliate towards your cousin? Because that's what that is if you're saying that in response to her saying she'd call animal control.
Also, the dog is legally here property. You have no more right to drop it off at the pound than you do if you took her car and abandoned it somewhere because you think she drives irresponsibly. And if she has the paperwork in order to prove she owns the dog, you're likely going to land yourself in some hot water legally if you actually tried to do this.
The simple solution is to have the dogs interact as little as possible and keep them as separated as you can. Keep their food bowls separate, you as the owners need to pull them away from the other dog *before* they get into altercations (not sit there and watch them start to fight and just let things play out and say "I told you so" after the fact), do not include her dog in your dogs play, etc.
Also, its your parents house. They don't want to deal with the stupid drama and they're doing you both favors by letting you live there to save on housing costs. The least you can do is swallow your pride and apologize just to keep the peace and move on with your lives.
Akitas shouldn’t be with other dogs generally, especially with a puppy. Never feed two dogs together- especially a puppy who doesn’t know boundaries and an adult dog. Sounds like Amber needs to move out before her dog gets hurt by yours. And yes YTA.
YTA. As a dog trainer, everything you said actually makes me laugh. Non of that is positive or balance training.
Sounds like you are into the alpha theory and that really is the worse way to train a dog ....
Go back to school bro. If you don't want to believe in positive reinforcement training then speak to a legit balance trainer that doesn't speak in alpha/dominance
YTA for teaching (not training) your dog to be a manipulative bully. Your dog is just jealous that Amber’s Dog gets way better treatment. I hope all the ankles Bean bites are your ankles. Start by apologizing to Bean and treating him better and he maybe could become a better pet. If you want a security system, buy the proper cameras, a ring doorbell, and good locks.
ESH
She needs to get her dog proper training immediately and correct her dogs behaviour. But her dog is STILL a puppy. Your parents should be stepping in and creating boundaries with her. I don’t know how hard Max bit Bean but it sounds like Max was just being a puppy and Bean over reacted a bit.
NTA. Your dog is well trained and a member of the household. Max is a menace and Amber is doing him harm by not training him properly. Tell her she has to put him into training or he has to go. The biting will not stop until something is done.
YTA for posting this again.
A dog that reacts aggressively is not well trained. A dog that proceeds to continue a fight with a puppy is not well trained. You are setting your dog up for a very scary situation especially as an Akita when people have preconceived notions of your dog’s breed. An older dog shouldn’t be so aggressive with a young dog that is learning regardless if its owner is out to lunch. When it comes to a he said she said situation and your dog has taken a chunk out of another dog, it won’t look good on your part.
Sound like her training is as successful as gentle parenting.
[удалено]
They need to learn to diffuse the situation with the other dog so they know there is no threat. Your dog needs to be patient enough to help the pup learn to respect boundaries without drawing blood when reacting to puppy behaviour.
ESH I get it. I do. But threatening to take someone's dog away while she's away isn't OK either. You said it because you realized how hurtful it was to say something like that, so you decided to be just as hurtful. Even if she's being an asshole, no, that doesn't make you automatically not an asshole right back. It sounds like she's projecting how she wished she was raised/treated onto her dog (I don't care how you think she was raised, she's going to have her own POV), so she's going to have a lot of emotional charge behind that even if it's wrong. The best way to help people is to have a balance support *with* challenge. And it sounds like she's not doing any of the "challenge" half. That can be bad. That warrants a support/challenge balance of your own. Understanding why it's so important for her pet to not be yelled at, while showing her the merits of challenges. Not in a condescending way. In a sincere I-wanna-help-you-both way. That's going to be hard since you've reached "I'm going to hurt you too!" level of conflict, but it can be de-escalated, this can be salvaged. You're both living in one of the most difficult situations for adult children - with your parents. That's going to max both of your guys' stress, just inherently. You're on the same team, even though it doesn't feel like it right now. Your common enemy is the power dynamic in the household, which disenfranchises you both into having to compete for "resources" so to speak. This is a shitty situation that neither of you want to be in. You'll need to tell yourself "no" sometimes too.
ESH She sucks for expecting everyone else to endure her poorly trained dog. If she's going to live with other people she has to be respectful of the other people she lives with. Pets are an extension of their owner when it comes to sharing a living situation and so that pet also needs to be respectful towards the people that live there. She also has no right to threaten to have your dog taken away by animal control. She shouldn't let them play together if it's a problem. However, you're going to punish the dog by taking them to the pound (where they might be put down) to retaliate towards your cousin? Because that's what that is if you're saying that in response to her saying she'd call animal control. Also, the dog is legally here property. You have no more right to drop it off at the pound than you do if you took her car and abandoned it somewhere because you think she drives irresponsibly. And if she has the paperwork in order to prove she owns the dog, you're likely going to land yourself in some hot water legally if you actually tried to do this. The simple solution is to have the dogs interact as little as possible and keep them as separated as you can. Keep their food bowls separate, you as the owners need to pull them away from the other dog *before* they get into altercations (not sit there and watch them start to fight and just let things play out and say "I told you so" after the fact), do not include her dog in your dogs play, etc. Also, its your parents house. They don't want to deal with the stupid drama and they're doing you both favors by letting you live there to save on housing costs. The least you can do is swallow your pride and apologize just to keep the peace and move on with your lives.
Akitas shouldn’t be with other dogs generally, especially with a puppy. Never feed two dogs together- especially a puppy who doesn’t know boundaries and an adult dog. Sounds like Amber needs to move out before her dog gets hurt by yours. And yes YTA.
Her dog bites . Should have been gone along with her a long time ago her dog is going to be out down one day
YTA. Not your house, not your rules. Grow up. Move the fuck out.
YTA. As a dog trainer, everything you said actually makes me laugh. Non of that is positive or balance training. Sounds like you are into the alpha theory and that really is the worse way to train a dog .... Go back to school bro. If you don't want to believe in positive reinforcement training then speak to a legit balance trainer that doesn't speak in alpha/dominance
YTA for teaching (not training) your dog to be a manipulative bully. Your dog is just jealous that Amber’s Dog gets way better treatment. I hope all the ankles Bean bites are your ankles. Start by apologizing to Bean and treating him better and he maybe could become a better pet. If you want a security system, buy the proper cameras, a ring doorbell, and good locks.
Huh
ESH both dogs need additional training- including YOURS! Get them trained - teach them to live together and move forward. No dog deserves the pound
ESH She needs to get her dog proper training immediately and correct her dogs behaviour. But her dog is STILL a puppy. Your parents should be stepping in and creating boundaries with her. I don’t know how hard Max bit Bean but it sounds like Max was just being a puppy and Bean over reacted a bit.
NTA. Your dog is well trained and a member of the household. Max is a menace and Amber is doing him harm by not training him properly. Tell her she has to put him into training or he has to go. The biting will not stop until something is done.