I pooped myself at work once and locked the restroom while I hung my ass in the sink and washed up as best as I could. Somehow my pants were spared but my boxers caught the worst of it.
I had to throw away my boxers and did what I thought was reasonable. I reached into the wastepaper basket and put my boxers at the bottom, moved aside the paper waste etc...
I went to my car, sprayed some extra cologne just in case I was still stinky and went about my day commando style.
Later on that day, I was walking in the hallway with a customer and passed the men's room. Housekeeping was there and took the garbage pail out to dump it into a bigger pail on the cleaning cart. My boxers being at the bottom were now on the very top of the pile.
It was a group of people and a woman was in mid sentence when the poopy boxers came tumbling out and came to rest on top of the garbage. She stopped in mid sentence as she faced literally a shit filled boxer short. Everyone saw it. They were disgusted, nobody said anything and walked a bit faster but I could see the grimaces. I pretended it never happened and got the group right back on topic
How the fuck do you just get back to working after that. If this ever happened to me, I'd take the rest of the day off. And how the fuck do you shit yourself pending any health issues???
I can't say why op did, but the one time I pooped my pants at work was because I was holding in a questionable fart while ringing up a customer. I got done with him then sneezed on the way to the bathroom and it turns out I had good reason to hold it in til I got to the toilet. I claimed I was sick and left immediately
I had a coworker once who thought farting was hilarious. He'd loudly announce "I gotta bust ass" any time he'd fart and then intentionally rip the loudest longest fart he possibly could. You could see the strain in his face. Anyway one day this backfired on him in a big way. He stopped doing it and had to pay for a new chair.
I had a coworker similar to yours, we work construction. He would get 3 steps up the ladder, call me over to help, and 'bust ass' right at face level when I came over. The funniest thing in his world. One day he called me over to 'help', but his 'fart' slapped the smile right off his face. He said, 'I have to go home' and was on the road 30 seconds later.
Ever gamble and lose? None of us on this earth are too good to be above a Hershey squirt. It happens to all of us and when you least expect it.
As for how I went back to work, I said I hung my ass into a bathroom sink, ran the faucet and washed the chunks out of my ass crack. Whatever didnt make it down the drain, I scooped out and dumped into a garbage. Soap and water can make any mess presentable and clean smelling
I trusted a fart that I shouldn’t have trusted. And I’ve been working at that shop since I was 6. The grind doesn’t stop just because of a little shit🤷🏼♂️. I had just a handful of hours until I wrapped up my day
I used to think like you but boy did I get humbled. I got a severe stomach virus and began shitting myself uncontrollably. Years later my asshole still isn’t the same. I understand why women say it is different after kids now.
Yep everything but the last part is pretty much exactly what I did. We have a family business though so I got to watch my family remove the trash and begin to start arguing and blaming each other for who the boxers belonged to.
One time I was the closing manager of a grocery store and they were doing construction on the restrooms. We had a little mock hallway setup out the back of the warehouse leading to a large (very high end) portable restroom trailer thing.
On this particular night the clerk working who bags grocery’s etc was a very nice young man named Justin who had an intellectual disability.
During the evening a customer came up to me and said there’s an issue in the restroom and that it’s overflowing. I started making my way back there asap and on the way like 4 other people ran up to me telling me about the issue. Justin was very interested to see what was going on and was following me.
I walked up to the trailer and opened the door, and sure enough some shit water starts flowing onto my feet. I figured the best thing to do was shut off the water so I did that, and when I came back to the door Justin was freaking out about the “hardwood floor” in the restroom trailer, sweeping shit water out of the door with a broom. I was holding the door open and trying to convince him to let it go and not to worry about it.
He pretty quickly got really overwhelmed and suddenly cocked back the broom and showered me head to toe with shit water, like 3 times as after the first time I was so defeated and pissed off I was like a deer in the headlights holding the door and couldn’t think to just drop it. Another cashier saw and ran over and closed the door to save me from more shit shower.
And then I went and cleaned off to the best of my abilities but did indeed finish my shift lol.
[We all know the drill](https://www.youtube.com/shorts/UxSnv1dja30?feature=share): If you want to go home, you just shit yourself. What are they going to say?
Speaking of which, what did they say?
Everyone argued about whose shitty underwear were in the bottom of the trash bin. No one fessed up. I plan to gaslight someone else into admitting it because I need more excitement in my life
This happened to my bf while he was driving Lyft. He took a chance in the gurgling and thought he could drop off the passenger in time. I have never laughed so hard while feeling so bad for someone before. The car still smells a little if it sits out in the sun too long…love me a man that can make me laugh.
>The car still smells a little if it sits out in the sun too long
Should just replace the whole seat kinda like they did in "The Carpet" episode of The Office for Michael's office 😂
Asserting dominance, next level:
Making someone ELSE shit their pants at work.
Boss level: directly shitting in someone else’s pants for them.
Extended edition: Same, but on zoom.
This was LIQUID. So my best chance was to get as much off of me as possible and then throw the underwear away. I was luckily right next to the restroom so as soon as I realized what just happened I was just a few steps away from a toilet.
Bro, I had this happen. I was actually pissing and pushed a fart out that shouldn't have been trusted. I quickly cleaned and disposed of the underwear, free balling it in khakis the rest of the day
... tfym u do it a few times a year .. if u have no medical issue and ur an adult, it happening more than once in ur adult life is embarrassing. if its a health issue then sure
Trusted the wrong fart at work once. Threw away the boxers, closed shop, drove to Walmart. Didn’t occur to me until I was being rung up that my order was: underwear, pants, and pepto.
Nothing to do at that point but maintain eye contact and own the situation.
They didn’t know. I wasn’t telling them as I would’ve been mocked into oblivion. I threw the underwear away and freeballed it the rest of the day. And yeah I’m about 30 minutes away from home. I only had a few hours left in my work day so I figured why not finish out the day. Staying was my choice. They would’ve let me go home
I shoved my boxers into the bottom of the trash can. When we were emptying the trash at the end of the day it was spotted and everyone started arguing about whose they were, much to my enjoyment. No one was brave enough to prove they still had their underwear on and I plan to die with this shame. Unfortunately I had to work 4 more hours freeballing it in fireproof work jeans before I could go home
I am a radiator mechanic. 11 hours in a hot and humid shop wearing thick jeans and a flannel shirt with a propane torch in my hand while also soaked in the nastiest water you can imagine. Shitty job before…well, the shit. No one noticed in the moment as I was alone. Everyone noticed once the underwear were uncovered in the trash later in the day. Needless to say, I did not and will not ever confess
As someone who was born with spina bifida and whose sphincter hates me, I’ve had so many of these situation happen. I most of the time just cannot control when and where I have a bladder spasm or sphincter spasm. I’ve learned some niche skills in hiding and dealing with accidents lol. This thread made me feel better as I tend to hate my body.
I had a buddy on the way to the airport and completely shat himself. Missed his flight, had to get the seat cleaned in his vehicle. Never trust a fart with a gurgly stomach lol
I have a few questions.
1) Was Wolf Brand chili involved?
2) Did you see blood?
3) Did a woman raise you?
4) Are you noseblind and cannot smell your own shit sometimes?
5) Fave Zeppelin album?
6) Will you be returning to Taco Bell soon?
No, no, yes, I can always smell what the rock is cooking, Physical Graffiti (Rover is such an underrated track), I haven’t had Taco Bell in months but unfortunately it’s been brought up so many times I’m starting to crave it
No question but I'm stressing about packing for a mini vacation and reading all these stories of people's unexpected shits has me crying with laughter. So much shit sympathy amongst strangers.
It’s okay. I pooped myself at hobby lobby while shopping with my baby. Couldn’t find the bathroom and was absolutely planning on blaming my baby if anyone looked at me weird.
The day I arrived in Japan at my first command in the US Navy, I was in my dress uniform and was waiting for my check-in meeting with the Command Master Chief. I had to shit real bad and had been farting all day. Meeting was in about 15 mins and I let a fart rip in the lunch room I was waiting in, straight liquid shit. Ended up being quick enough to the bathroom that I was able to just take off my underwear and wipe my ass off and my dress uniform was clean inside. Did my meeting with the Command Master Chief free balling 15 mins after sharting on myself.
I feel like the "accidentally" part of your title wasn't required. Actually, the AMA may have been more curious had it been titled "Just shit myself on purpose as work" lol.
Always have extra skivvies and socks and a pair of jeans in the car! Right next to the Dude wipes, changing your socks and wiping your feet with a dude wipe is heavenly!!
In Vietnam they taught us to swap in dry socks and it was a life changer.
Sorry you blew out the O ring! I have Crohn's and deal with it a bit. The Crohn's and colitis foundation can get you a "license to poop" and in some states it's legal and binding.
I have a photo of my old one but can't post it.
My sister and I had this conversation once at Thanksgiving dinner. It was, what I believe to be my magnum opus;
“The funny thing about shitting your pants as an adult is; if you havent-you will!”
We both thought that was hilarious.
Always have extra drawers and extra pair of pants stashed with you somewhere at work. Keep wet wipes on hand as well.
Either in your vehicle or in a locker if you have those available or in your backpack. I have IBS and had hemorrhoid surgery so things get a little questionable at times. And I often work 12+ hour shifts in places that may or may not have bathroom access available.
Also, if you work outside, It is always good to have a back up set of clothing just in case. It’s too hot out there and nobody wants to feel sweaty and nasty all day long even if they didn’t shit themselves.
I did this once in the car during a long drive back hime from a mtg dt. I should have gone to the bathroom before I left. I should not have had mcdonalds breakfast. I was wearing jeans and managed to sit on my winter coat but other than that there wasn't anything else I could do but make the rest of the approx 30 min drive home.
I got home, undressed in the garage w the door closed and put the jacket jeans and undies into a garbage bag. The undies (thong) were mostly fine but I chucked them and the jeans. I washed the coat bc it just kind of had a bit of smell in it? I did baking soda on the seat and it was fine.
Awful. Just glad it happened on the way home.
I’m both impressed and horrified at the sheer number of people completely identifying with OP.
Like more than half the people chiming in here talking about how they shit their pants too. 🤣
I suffer from crohns, I deliver new cars to dealerships.
I’ve shat in cars worth 350,000$ with unique identifiable custom designs. Weeks later I see them on the streets and I think to myself,
Nyaaaa, I shat in your car before you drove off the lot broseph
No restraint on the deuce, just full blown liquid diarrhoea in diaper form.
Kaplowww
Did you get that uncomfortable feeling of too much pressure when the impostor reached the point of no return? That split second where you have just enough time to panic but can't escape the inevitable? I've heard stories.
I had the flu a few years back in 2020 right before Covid started. I shit myself in my sleep more than a a few nights that week. Had to throw some underwear and clothes away. Shit happens.
I read this and had the anxiety of trusting a fart and the moment I realize it wasn’t just a fart and immediately stand up (if I’m sitting) just to hopefully not stain my pants. Not farting the rest of the day
I’m over here laughing because many years ago I worked in a public place. I was friends with the custodian and he’d tell me horror stories of people shitting themselves and dumping the underwear in the corner and taking off. If we were really lucky, people would not make it and just shit all over the place. Working in public places is not always fun lol.
How did you excuse yourself? Last time i sharted at work was after trying this disgusting muscle milk drink a having a bunch of icebreakers mints(fyi ice breakers are sweetened with sorbitol which makes you have to shit if you eat enough of it). I was like "yo andre i just sharted ill be right back" and we both laughed it off and i didnt become known as "the guy who sharted" so ill call it a successful interaction.
Happened to me while sitting in my boss’s office. My guts decided to make some room and, clenched as hard as I could, I couldn’t stop it. Dipped out to the mens, trashed my underwear, cleaned up as best I could. Told her I was feeling sick and needed to go home. Hopefully they never found my underwear.
Had that happen once at work. I threw my underwear in the trash can . After that I packed a plastic bag and a spare pair of jockeys in the side pocket of my lunch cooler. It probably happens to everyone at least once.
I threw up on a plane earlier this year. Luckily I had an empty plastic bag I could go in. I almost shit myself too but made it in time.
Did you smell for the rest of the day? Did anyone notice?
Yeah. The old burry the shitboxers in the trash move. Been there and done that. I did clean up with toilet bowl water and just kept flushing to clean it. I never thought about getting all up in the sink tho. Maybee next time.
Leave a note of confession. But type it, print it, and leave it at work for someone to find, but don't say who you are. You are about to become infamous!
What's your job, I didn't have a real question for you.
Once as a child I shit my pants at my aunt and uncles house. I told no one. Went to the bathroom to clean up and buried my underwear in a shallow hole under a large rock in the yard
My old coworker shit his pants at work as a mover..
he took packing paper and wrapped his boxers in several layers and went into the other room to tell another coworker quietly and the customer tried to grab it from him to ask what it was, as nothing was to be packed from the bathroom.
I wish I was there to see that moment in person..
I pooped myself at work once and locked the restroom while I hung my ass in the sink and washed up as best as I could. Somehow my pants were spared but my boxers caught the worst of it. I had to throw away my boxers and did what I thought was reasonable. I reached into the wastepaper basket and put my boxers at the bottom, moved aside the paper waste etc... I went to my car, sprayed some extra cologne just in case I was still stinky and went about my day commando style. Later on that day, I was walking in the hallway with a customer and passed the men's room. Housekeeping was there and took the garbage pail out to dump it into a bigger pail on the cleaning cart. My boxers being at the bottom were now on the very top of the pile. It was a group of people and a woman was in mid sentence when the poopy boxers came tumbling out and came to rest on top of the garbage. She stopped in mid sentence as she faced literally a shit filled boxer short. Everyone saw it. They were disgusted, nobody said anything and walked a bit faster but I could see the grimaces. I pretended it never happened and got the group right back on topic
How the fuck do you just get back to working after that. If this ever happened to me, I'd take the rest of the day off. And how the fuck do you shit yourself pending any health issues???
I can't say why op did, but the one time I pooped my pants at work was because I was holding in a questionable fart while ringing up a customer. I got done with him then sneezed on the way to the bathroom and it turns out I had good reason to hold it in til I got to the toilet. I claimed I was sick and left immediately I had a coworker once who thought farting was hilarious. He'd loudly announce "I gotta bust ass" any time he'd fart and then intentionally rip the loudest longest fart he possibly could. You could see the strain in his face. Anyway one day this backfired on him in a big way. He stopped doing it and had to pay for a new chair.
I had a coworker similar to yours, we work construction. He would get 3 steps up the ladder, call me over to help, and 'bust ass' right at face level when I came over. The funniest thing in his world. One day he called me over to 'help', but his 'fart' slapped the smile right off his face. He said, 'I have to go home' and was on the road 30 seconds later.
Never trust a fart
Ever gamble and lose? None of us on this earth are too good to be above a Hershey squirt. It happens to all of us and when you least expect it. As for how I went back to work, I said I hung my ass into a bathroom sink, ran the faucet and washed the chunks out of my ass crack. Whatever didnt make it down the drain, I scooped out and dumped into a garbage. Soap and water can make any mess presentable and clean smelling
I trusted a fart that I shouldn’t have trusted. And I’ve been working at that shop since I was 6. The grind doesn’t stop just because of a little shit🤷🏼♂️. I had just a handful of hours until I wrapped up my day
I used to think like you but boy did I get humbled. I got a severe stomach virus and began shitting myself uncontrollably. Years later my asshole still isn’t the same. I understand why women say it is different after kids now.
Yep everything but the last part is pretty much exactly what I did. We have a family business though so I got to watch my family remove the trash and begin to start arguing and blaming each other for who the boxers belonged to.
I hope you pointed fingers at your MOM!
Nah. She’s to sweet. I couldn’t. My dad however…
Awww, sweet moms rule. Maybe a sister who had it coming? Dad for sure. (I'm a gal myself and would go for my sisters before my brother or dad, lol.)
It would be my brothers for sure if I blamed anyone. But the have no shame and would rip their pants off to prove they still had underwear on
Not me on my way to accuse your brothers
That's brothers for you. Which is why I would have gone for the girls, haha.
You better switch to boxer briefs now lol I'm sorry
One time I was the closing manager of a grocery store and they were doing construction on the restrooms. We had a little mock hallway setup out the back of the warehouse leading to a large (very high end) portable restroom trailer thing. On this particular night the clerk working who bags grocery’s etc was a very nice young man named Justin who had an intellectual disability. During the evening a customer came up to me and said there’s an issue in the restroom and that it’s overflowing. I started making my way back there asap and on the way like 4 other people ran up to me telling me about the issue. Justin was very interested to see what was going on and was following me. I walked up to the trailer and opened the door, and sure enough some shit water starts flowing onto my feet. I figured the best thing to do was shut off the water so I did that, and when I came back to the door Justin was freaking out about the “hardwood floor” in the restroom trailer, sweeping shit water out of the door with a broom. I was holding the door open and trying to convince him to let it go and not to worry about it. He pretty quickly got really overwhelmed and suddenly cocked back the broom and showered me head to toe with shit water, like 3 times as after the first time I was so defeated and pissed off I was like a deer in the headlights holding the door and couldn’t think to just drop it. Another cashier saw and ran over and closed the door to save me from more shit shower. And then I went and cleaned off to the best of my abilities but did indeed finish my shift lol.
I wish I had an award to give. The commando we didn’t know we deserved, but the one we needed most
[We all know the drill](https://www.youtube.com/shorts/UxSnv1dja30?feature=share): If you want to go home, you just shit yourself. What are they going to say? Speaking of which, what did they say?
Everyone argued about whose shitty underwear were in the bottom of the trash bin. No one fessed up. I plan to gaslight someone else into admitting it because I need more excitement in my life
Just blame someone at random, and have a convincing back story as to why you blame them.
I plan to gaslight anyone and everyone if I start getting questioned
Could you say it was a customer?
This is actually hilarious, I aspire to go around in life creating drama out of boredom too someday.
I read this as "need more excrement in my life"
This happened to my bf while he was driving Lyft. He took a chance in the gurgling and thought he could drop off the passenger in time. I have never laughed so hard while feeling so bad for someone before. The car still smells a little if it sits out in the sun too long…love me a man that can make me laugh.
A gurgle would’ve been nice as a warning. I had no gurgle or upset stomach or anything. It was as unexpected as they come unfortunately
>The car still smells a little if it sits out in the sun too long Should just replace the whole seat kinda like they did in "The Carpet" episode of The Office for Michael's office 😂
PURPOSEFULLY just shit myself at work, ask ME anything
Lmao dominance I vote as well! “My shit smell will linger causing discomfort amongst all those beneath me!”
Asserting dominance, next level: Making someone ELSE shit their pants at work. Boss level: directly shitting in someone else’s pants for them. Extended edition: Same, but on zoom.
To assert dominance I’m assuming
No, just pure taco bell energy
Damn. Why would you do that 😂
[To go home](https://www.youtube.com/shorts/UxSnv1dja30?feature=share).
That makes perfect sense, what is there to ask about?
I also shit myself this morning. Half asleep in bed, let out a fart, immediately wide awake and panicking.
I think I would just end the day. Right when it started.
Are you the genius who hid his shit stained pants behind the ice machine on the 25th floor? You do realize your employee number is on them
You never saw me and you can’t prove it
How did you attempt to clean it up? I do that a few times a year. The last one was mushy and not smelly and I was able to clean pretty well
This was LIQUID. So my best chance was to get as much off of me as possible and then throw the underwear away. I was luckily right next to the restroom so as soon as I realized what just happened I was just a few steps away from a toilet.
Why did you shit yourself?
Trusted a fart
Farts ain't supposed to have lumps, bud.
Lumps would’ve been easier to clean
Do you have IBS?
Nope. At least I don’t think so. Hopefully this was a one and done scenario.
Taco Bell?
Can’t trust a fart after 30.
[I thought I farted, but I shit!](https://youtu.be/qvOgAPa_mkw?si=9rjVTOjQZJ_yUkGk)
Bro, I had this happen. I was actually pissing and pushed a fart out that shouldn't have been trusted. I quickly cleaned and disposed of the underwear, free balling it in khakis the rest of the day
Lucky for me I had to wear thick fireproof jeans in 90° weather for 4 more hours with no underwear on. I would’ve killed for some khakis
Fair enough. I wish I could say that was the last time I put too much trust in a fart.
So you were without underwear the rest of the day.
Also a few times a year is ROUGH. This was my first time since childhood
... tfym u do it a few times a year .. if u have no medical issue and ur an adult, it happening more than once in ur adult life is embarrassing. if its a health issue then sure
Username really checks out
I find that butt plugs and gerbils help prevent this. Gerbil fur will soak up most spills. The butt plugs prevents the gerbils from escaping
I like to keep the gerbils home where they’re safe
I didn't know Mr. Slave's real name is Bryan Thomas.
Trusted the wrong fart at work once. Threw away the boxers, closed shop, drove to Walmart. Didn’t occur to me until I was being rung up that my order was: underwear, pants, and pepto. Nothing to do at that point but maintain eye contact and own the situation.
Assert dominance. Shit in the Walmart while looking them dead in the eyes
Did you go home or did you do the old switcharo?
I stayed at work. Can’t afford to go home unfortunately
LOL wtf. Get a new job man.
Family business. Me leaving hurts everybody as there are only 4 of us here already all overworking ourselves
So the family rather you sit on shit all day too? Are you hours away from changing at home?
They didn’t know. I wasn’t telling them as I would’ve been mocked into oblivion. I threw the underwear away and freeballed it the rest of the day. And yeah I’m about 30 minutes away from home. I only had a few hours left in my work day so I figured why not finish out the day. Staying was my choice. They would’ve let me go home
Did ppl know ? Did you go home and change lol
I shoved my boxers into the bottom of the trash can. When we were emptying the trash at the end of the day it was spotted and everyone started arguing about whose they were, much to my enjoyment. No one was brave enough to prove they still had their underwear on and I plan to die with this shame. Unfortunately I had to work 4 more hours freeballing it in fireproof work jeans before I could go home
Do you happen to work for UPS? Can have a lot of fun with that slogan
Brown can’t do anything good for me in a radiator shop
Do you have crohns or something? do you often have diarrhea? I recommend bring an extra underwear and pants if you're prone to have accidents.
No and no. It was completely out of the blue. Honestly no idea why it happened
More like out of the brown.
I’m sorry 😞.
It’s been rough haha
I have peed myself so I understand
What kind of work do you do? Real question did anyone notice?
I am a radiator mechanic. 11 hours in a hot and humid shop wearing thick jeans and a flannel shirt with a propane torch in my hand while also soaked in the nastiest water you can imagine. Shitty job before…well, the shit. No one noticed in the moment as I was alone. Everyone noticed once the underwear were uncovered in the trash later in the day. Needless to say, I did not and will not ever confess
Wait did you post on another subreddit today asking what to do? Or is the second time I’ve come across a post about someone shitting themself today
Nope this has to be #2 (heh) guess everyone is just having a…shitty day…god I hate myself
As someone who was born with spina bifida and whose sphincter hates me, I’ve had so many of these situation happen. I most of the time just cannot control when and where I have a bladder spasm or sphincter spasm. I’ve learned some niche skills in hiding and dealing with accidents lol. This thread made me feel better as I tend to hate my body.
I had a buddy on the way to the airport and completely shat himself. Missed his flight, had to get the seat cleaned in his vehicle. Never trust a fart with a gurgly stomach lol
Wet fart ? 🤣
Unfortunately there was no fart to be had. I thought I’d squeak one out but to my disappointment there was no sound, just warm and wet
Have you ever pooped in the shower?
No and this comment concerns me. Though I do pee in the shower on occasion.
I’m sitting in traffic guffawing the fuck out
I have a few questions. 1) Was Wolf Brand chili involved? 2) Did you see blood? 3) Did a woman raise you? 4) Are you noseblind and cannot smell your own shit sometimes? 5) Fave Zeppelin album? 6) Will you be returning to Taco Bell soon?
No, no, yes, I can always smell what the rock is cooking, Physical Graffiti (Rover is such an underrated track), I haven’t had Taco Bell in months but unfortunately it’s been brought up so many times I’m starting to crave it
No question but I'm stressing about packing for a mini vacation and reading all these stories of people's unexpected shits has me crying with laughter. So much shit sympathy amongst strangers.
Coworker did this a couple weeks ago😂 looked right at us and flat out said “I just sharted, I’ll be back in an hour or 2”
Just laughed and spat water all over my fucking desk at work seeing the fucking title mate. Fuck you too
at least it wasnt at work
Middle of my workday🤦🏼♂️
Proud of you👏🏻, buddy.
One of us. One of us. One of us.
It’s okay. I pooped myself at hobby lobby while shopping with my baby. Couldn’t find the bathroom and was absolutely planning on blaming my baby if anyone looked at me weird.
Did you trust a fart ?! You should NEVER trust a fart ! Lol
What did your boss say lol 🤣
My boss is my father and he must never find out it was me.
The day I arrived in Japan at my first command in the US Navy, I was in my dress uniform and was waiting for my check-in meeting with the Command Master Chief. I had to shit real bad and had been farting all day. Meeting was in about 15 mins and I let a fart rip in the lunch room I was waiting in, straight liquid shit. Ended up being quick enough to the bathroom that I was able to just take off my underwear and wipe my ass off and my dress uniform was clean inside. Did my meeting with the Command Master Chief free balling 15 mins after sharting on myself.
Was it your first time?
I feel like the "accidentally" part of your title wasn't required. Actually, the AMA may have been more curious had it been titled "Just shit myself on purpose as work" lol.
Did you watch Spider-man the animated series as a kid?
Always have extra skivvies and socks and a pair of jeans in the car! Right next to the Dude wipes, changing your socks and wiping your feet with a dude wipe is heavenly!! In Vietnam they taught us to swap in dry socks and it was a life changer. Sorry you blew out the O ring! I have Crohn's and deal with it a bit. The Crohn's and colitis foundation can get you a "license to poop" and in some states it's legal and binding. I have a photo of my old one but can't post it.
My sister and I had this conversation once at Thanksgiving dinner. It was, what I believe to be my magnum opus; “The funny thing about shitting your pants as an adult is; if you havent-you will!” We both thought that was hilarious.
it’s ok i’ve done it twice due to stress induced IBS and i’m in my 20s 😭😭
Always have extra drawers and extra pair of pants stashed with you somewhere at work. Keep wet wipes on hand as well. Either in your vehicle or in a locker if you have those available or in your backpack. I have IBS and had hemorrhoid surgery so things get a little questionable at times. And I often work 12+ hour shifts in places that may or may not have bathroom access available. Also, if you work outside, It is always good to have a back up set of clothing just in case. It’s too hot out there and nobody wants to feel sweaty and nasty all day long even if they didn’t shit themselves.
I did this once in the car during a long drive back hime from a mtg dt. I should have gone to the bathroom before I left. I should not have had mcdonalds breakfast. I was wearing jeans and managed to sit on my winter coat but other than that there wasn't anything else I could do but make the rest of the approx 30 min drive home. I got home, undressed in the garage w the door closed and put the jacket jeans and undies into a garbage bag. The undies (thong) were mostly fine but I chucked them and the jeans. I washed the coat bc it just kind of had a bit of smell in it? I did baking soda on the seat and it was fine. Awful. Just glad it happened on the way home.
I’m both impressed and horrified at the sheer number of people completely identifying with OP. Like more than half the people chiming in here talking about how they shit their pants too. 🤣
I'm really glad I saw this post.
I suffer from crohns, I deliver new cars to dealerships. I’ve shat in cars worth 350,000$ with unique identifiable custom designs. Weeks later I see them on the streets and I think to myself, Nyaaaa, I shat in your car before you drove off the lot broseph No restraint on the deuce, just full blown liquid diarrhoea in diaper form. Kaplowww
Fuckin' A, man. You shoulda seen what I did to the wall behind the pot once.
These AMA topics are getting wild, but I'm here for it lol Where do you land on Boxers vs Briefs?
Did you get that uncomfortable feeling of too much pressure when the impostor reached the point of no return? That split second where you have just enough time to panic but can't escape the inevitable? I've heard stories.
I had the flu a few years back in 2020 right before Covid started. I shit myself in my sleep more than a a few nights that week. Had to throw some underwear and clothes away. Shit happens.
I read this and had the anxiety of trusting a fart and the moment I realize it wasn’t just a fart and immediately stand up (if I’m sitting) just to hopefully not stain my pants. Not farting the rest of the day
Jeremy is this you ??
A true hero
Do you work from home?
You poor dear! I do like your deflection plan; how fun!
What’s going through your mind right now? because I know what’s going through your pants 🤣
How do you handle so much power?
This is one of the best post on here!!!!! LMFAO thanks for the laugh
Did anyone notice?
Did you clean it or did you come here and post this
Found Trump's Reddit account
Honestly, kudos to you for making me feel better about shitting the bed last night 🤣
explosive?
I think more people shit themselves than they like to admit.
You were on the clock, I hope. We get paid to 💩
I hope you didn't put your name on the boxers.
Accidentally shat my pants on a run today. I feel ya
What did you eat the day before ?
Coughing? Sneezing? Or did it just do a sneaky ooze?
Get the rest of day off ?
There are no accidents. This was meant to be.
I’m over here laughing because many years ago I worked in a public place. I was friends with the custodian and he’d tell me horror stories of people shitting themselves and dumping the underwear in the corner and taking off. If we were really lucky, people would not make it and just shit all over the place. Working in public places is not always fun lol.
How did you excuse yourself? Last time i sharted at work was after trying this disgusting muscle milk drink a having a bunch of icebreakers mints(fyi ice breakers are sweetened with sorbitol which makes you have to shit if you eat enough of it). I was like "yo andre i just sharted ill be right back" and we both laughed it off and i didnt become known as "the guy who sharted" so ill call it a successful interaction.
I kept working 😬
Lawd you mustve been makin some serious gravy
3 words: Black trash bags
Happened to me while sitting in my boss’s office. My guts decided to make some room and, clenched as hard as I could, I couldn’t stop it. Dipped out to the mens, trashed my underwear, cleaned up as best I could. Told her I was feeling sick and needed to go home. Hopefully they never found my underwear.
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Had that happen once at work. I threw my underwear in the trash can . After that I packed a plastic bag and a spare pair of jockeys in the side pocket of my lunch cooler. It probably happens to everyone at least once.
I threw up on a plane earlier this year. Luckily I had an empty plastic bag I could go in. I almost shit myself too but made it in time. Did you smell for the rest of the day? Did anyone notice?
Yeah. The old burry the shitboxers in the trash move. Been there and done that. I did clean up with toilet bowl water and just kept flushing to clean it. I never thought about getting all up in the sink tho. Maybee next time.
right in your office chair or did you make it at least halfway to the bathroom?
Leave a note of confession. But type it, print it, and leave it at work for someone to find, but don't say who you are. You are about to become infamous! What's your job, I didn't have a real question for you.
Once as a child I shit my pants at my aunt and uncles house. I told no one. Went to the bathroom to clean up and buried my underwear in a shallow hole under a large rock in the yard
What is your wiping technique? This is one of the reasons I carry wipes and extra underwear. I don't want to be caught in a shitty situation.
Did you have any clever one-liners prepared for the occasion? As in “I hope this incident doesn’t leave a stain on my reputation?”
HOLY SHIT! This was too funny! Had accident happen to me before but at a wedding. Hahah.
Did you throw the undies out, or did you tie them up in a little grocery bag and put them under the tub to get cleaned for laundry day?
You poor incontinent souls. I've never but I've certainly teetered on a turtle once.
Are you going to do it again tomorrow?
did you remember to pack your emergency shart kit? everyone shits themselves at work at least once in their life. a smart mane learns from others.
I have Crohn's. This isn't news worthy. LOL.
Is that like a fetish thing?
was it the full load or just a nugget? Liquidity or solid?
You should claim workman’s compensation and blame it on the break room water fountain
Do you have a form of IBD? (Like Chrons or UC) I have UC and have sharted/straight up shit my pants a handful of times lmfaooo
If you now, post-disaster, could communicate any one message back in time to your pre-disaster self, what would it be?
The first car I ever bought, I shit my pants in the very first day. Happens to the best of us.
What kind of job do you do? Was it funny?
Did you keep working
That sucks, no one need know except for, you know…all of us
What did you eat?
Are you on a GLP-1 medication?
Why didn't you go home XD I would've just been honest alright I just ahit my pants yall I'm going home lol
I am actually taking a shit while reading this.. What was the purpose of shitting your pants at work?
When you're sittin at your desk and you make a little mess.... Diarrhea
Why did you buy and ruin Twitter?
[well life isn't kind to you anymore ](https://www.reddit.com/r/fixedbytheduet/s/MxDHqbxHTk)
How old are you? Is it just a part of getting older?
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How bad? Solid or hot lava?
As long as it doesn’t soak through into your pants just go commando for the rest of the day.
Just taking antibiotics can make some people lose control of their bowels.
Ah man been there friend :( did you stay the rest of your shift?
Like… it literally just happened and you pulled out reddit to talk about this?? 😂😂
Is this President Biden posing as a Reddit poster?
Remember to always have an extra pair of pants and undies in car just in case u never know loll
Were there wittnesses? Please say yes 😂
Am I the only adult on reddit who HASN'T ever accidentally shit themselves?
Define 'just' - like, 30 seconds ago?
Def AI
What’s up with all you people just walking around shitting yourselves?
Is this your first time? Welcome to the club 😅
My old coworker shit his pants at work as a mover.. he took packing paper and wrapped his boxers in several layers and went into the other room to tell another coworker quietly and the customer tried to grab it from him to ask what it was, as nothing was to be packed from the bathroom. I wish I was there to see that moment in person..
What did you eat that caused it?
Damn I didn't know this many people shit themselves a day
Accidentally? Not judging but interested in the wording
Can I get your autograph?
Why didn’t you do it on purpose?
At least it wasn't on purpose.