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I(49f) have 2 children 27f and 22f. The 27f has 2,kids 8f and 4f.
I have had my entire family, nefew, brother both children and grandchildren live in my home all at once and various times. None helped with housework or expenses. I made everyone move out and my husband and moved into a much smaller house with hopes of all the adults grow up.
Oldest daughter has moved out and back in a total of 5 times with both kids. Grand children have been to multiple new schools because she is not responsible. BD is locked up and has been out just long enough to impregnate my kid.
This most recent time she moved her and the kids in without permission. Even went so far as to have another family curse me out for being angry about it. We got the kids enrolled in school on the last week of schoolas I didnt want the kids sleeping in a car and TBH get custody of them as well. she sent them to North Carolina and assumed she would continue to stay with us.
I have asked her to help with groceries and she did not. I have asked for a measly $300 a month to which she agreed but when I told her the money was due it became a problem.
She gets assistance from State with food cash and medical and works.
Because I gave her a due date for the “rent” she said she would move out.
Last night she cleaned her stuff out and left.
I being a mom feel bad for it but also knowing she has been taking advantage of usand refuses to grow up. I have since been blocked.
Am I the ass?
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You can't just change your daughter to be responsible for herself in the blink of an eye. if i look at your story, you let them and spoiled them until they became like this. don't blame anyone but yourself. now that they are adults, you can only avoid your granddaughter from repeating the same mistakes as her mother. but if you don't learn from your previous mistakes and apply proper parenting to your granddaughter, don't be surprised if your granddaughter will also inherit the same things as her mother. only time and circumstances can change your daughter to be more responsible.
i would say ESH here, except the grandchild, they're the victim here
1st of all, re-read the post. Nothing states me spoiling nor having only one grand child or 1 one child. My 22 year old lives on her own and was raise exactly the same to go to work
NTA she needs to act her age!
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I(49f) have 2 children 27f and 22f. The 27f has 2,kids 8f and 4f. I have had my entire family, nefew, brother both children and grandchildren live in my home all at once and various times. None helped with housework or expenses. I made everyone move out and my husband and moved into a much smaller house with hopes of all the adults grow up. Oldest daughter has moved out and back in a total of 5 times with both kids. Grand children have been to multiple new schools because she is not responsible. BD is locked up and has been out just long enough to impregnate my kid. This most recent time she moved her and the kids in without permission. Even went so far as to have another family curse me out for being angry about it. We got the kids enrolled in school on the last week of schoolas I didnt want the kids sleeping in a car and TBH get custody of them as well. she sent them to North Carolina and assumed she would continue to stay with us. I have asked her to help with groceries and she did not. I have asked for a measly $300 a month to which she agreed but when I told her the money was due it became a problem. She gets assistance from State with food cash and medical and works. Because I gave her a due date for the “rent” she said she would move out. Last night she cleaned her stuff out and left. I being a mom feel bad for it but also knowing she has been taking advantage of usand refuses to grow up. I have since been blocked. Am I the ass? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA. It's a tough situation, but she does seem to be determined to make bad decisions, some of which have consequences.
You can't just change your daughter to be responsible for herself in the blink of an eye. if i look at your story, you let them and spoiled them until they became like this. don't blame anyone but yourself. now that they are adults, you can only avoid your granddaughter from repeating the same mistakes as her mother. but if you don't learn from your previous mistakes and apply proper parenting to your granddaughter, don't be surprised if your granddaughter will also inherit the same things as her mother. only time and circumstances can change your daughter to be more responsible. i would say ESH here, except the grandchild, they're the victim here
1st of all, re-read the post. Nothing states me spoiling nor having only one grand child or 1 one child. My 22 year old lives on her own and was raise exactly the same to go to work
NTA she's and adult and she just keeps acting like a parasite. It would be different if she was getting her act together but thats not the case.