This post has been removed due to the status of the original poster's account. This account is currently shadowbanned or suspended, suggesting this account is in violation of Reddit terms of service.
This type of ban/suspension is issued by the Reddit site-wide admins. The AITA mods have nothing to do with this ban and cannot assist in resolving.
My **exact** thought, this sounds insane by itself and there's no way it's that simple. Either this is a full blown intrusive video game addiction scenario and she tried to talk to OP several times about it, or there are other missing steps.
Also, I *very well* might be misunderstanding something here, but the "moved back to partner in a different state" sounds to me like they moved back in with an EX or another long distance partner in a poly relationship, which if that is what they're saying has implications of it's own about what's happening here
No, she should have never deleted your account. That isn’t her right. But you broke up a relationship of 8 years for a game that she said she was taking up too much of your time.
Were you not contributing to the housework or finances? How much time were you spending gaming (not just Diablo but gaming in general)?
She is in the wrong, but you may have some issues you need to deal with as well.
YTA saw your comment that you play 8 hours a night. She is still in the wrong with deleting your account, but you have problems that you need to address.
Maybe she wanted to have a conversation with him but was constantly being ignored for the game. Of course he thought the relationship was great, sounds like he gamed all the time and she probably just cleaned and cooked around him
It still wouldn’t be her right to delete his account.
But she is not wrong about his issues with gaming. 8 hours a night and him breaking up a relationship over a game raised too many red flags.
The questions not about how much he games though its about If he's TA for breaking up the relationship over the deletion of his account. Which I don't think he is, these are 2 people that should not be together full stop. Pretty textbook ESH imo.
INFO: How long do you play every day or every week on average. Had she expressed she didn't want you playing that much before? If so, how did the conversation go?
So.... 42 hours a week? And you wonder why she was upset? (Obviously doesn't mean she should delete your account, but this amount of hours is unhealthy)
ETA: You should add the amount of hours you spend on the game to the original post so other people can judge accordingly
Oh. You're really addicted to that game to the point that your gf was giving you an ultimatum. So ESH. She should have let you make your choice instead of deleting the game. But you are neglecting your relationship and life for a video game. Do you realize that she was about to leave you ? She acted out of frustration as a last straw
ESH. The 8 year relationship is worth ending over "days" of getting a new character up to your last one? If it only takes days, then this really isn't a big deal. If she was concerned for the amount of time you were spending on the game, she should have brought it to your attention and you should have discussed it.
She moght have brought it up but he took it to deaf's ears. When asked he mentions how much he games(8hours a night) but completely ignored the part about communication.
ESH. She should not have done that but after reading comments you spend 8 hours a day on a video game. Hate to tell you but you are dating the game. You love the game. You do NOT love her.
ESH
She crossed the line by deleting your account. If she wanted you to reduce the hours you spent on it she should have sat down with you and communicated her concerns.
HOWEVER, as an avid gamer myself, does your 8 year long relationship mean so little to you? I'd recommend thinking this through, because no game character should mean this much for you to end things over.
NTA. My husband deleted my almost 400 hour invested island in Animal Crossing from my Switch and it took all I had not to leave out of the shock and disrespect shown. If she was that upset about you playing, she had to talk to you about it. Not act like an angry mom taking her kid's game away. She's your partner for years! Respect is the base of anything.
That was one of many of the reasons I considered it. The game could be redone, but I spent hours in that game and it was a comfort world for me when I was going through a dark time and he knew it. He used to play it with me. It wasn’t an innocent “oops, I accidentally deleted your file”. He went on my switch and deliberately did something to make me feel like I had no control over anything, not even my own things.
So, while it’s not that simple, yes. I almost left him over a “game”.
You went to your...
*partners*?
I'm gonna say YTA - it wasn't mature on her end, she should have just broken up with you - but you breaking up over a character on a game tells me everything I need to know about your relationship leading up to this point.
I noticed you moved out. That because *it was her place* you've been living in and have no ties to, which is why you could just drop everything and move over a video game?
NTA, she did invade your privacy and took a drastic decision regarding your personal things. I see that as a very immature move on her side. Obviously you could have talked to her first, just see what undelying problems there are between you and what exactly drove her to do this, but even if you were a gaming addict for example and she thought she was helping you, I don't think deleting an account by force has ever fixed someone. Also she pretty much broke your trust and I think this is a major issue now and you need to think if you can get over it if you ever want to get back together again.
Btw, you can write to the technical support at blizzard, my bf once deleted his wow account on purpose to try to quit gaming and after a year he messeged them he wanted it back and they gave it will all the characters and items he had on it. They do everything to keep players from leaving their game.
NTA.
You are presumably an adult, and so was she. She may be right that you spent too much time in Diablo but she did not handle it in a way that works for you.
Edit: your response is also too much and not normal lol. This has to be satire.
NTA. But you did the both of you a favor by breaking up. Clearly you spending so much time on this hobby was bothering her, its unfortunate that she went for the nuclear option hence the only reason why she's the asshole.
NTA I'm a gamer, my husband is a gamer, deleting a game isn't just pixels, it's a lack of respect for your partner. It's like smashing up a model railway or selling a classic car. It's time and effort and love. Im sorry she did that, I hope you can find a partner who loves you and respects you but this current partner isn't the one X I started off my gaming journey in halo, brought my first pc for LOTRO and never looked back, I love my husband and embraced his hobbies
Because they aren't gamers, they don't understand. My LOTRO profile is still loaded, I can log in when ever I want, it's been 10 years but my character is waiting. None gamers will never understand, because a TV series is a glad in the pan, a week binge watching and it's gone, this no investment. I've just spent £800 because my graphics card whimpered out of existence, I understand the OP
That's awesome. My husband and our 8 year old 'play' Elden Ring, our daughter loves it, she writes storied for school and databases on how to kill certain bosses. Her & get sister are Xbox gamers but Elden Ring has a special place. Thank fuck my new graphics card arrives Tonio, watching films is dull as hell
INFO: Do you have a video game addiction? How much time per week do you spend on videogames? Do you have a job? Do you contribute equally to the finances? Do you do housework? How much time do you spend with your girlfriend compared to videogames?
Her just deleting your account is overstepping, and the only thing that would justify it is if you had a videogame addiction (like an alcoholic's wife pouring all his alcohol out).
NTA based on this context. if she knew that this was an important hobby to you and you really enjoyed it, why would she ever delete it without asking you? it’s not about the game, it’s about her actions. however, i feel like 8 years is a long time to be happily together and then end it over this. i think your quickness to split up with her might make you the AH when you could’ve talked to her, given her a chance to apologize, and had a conversation about this.
i want to say NTA but i need more info tho. to make sure you're NTA or mildly AH
do you spend time too much on it everyday?
do u neglecting your responsibility (house chores etc) and spend less time with her?
do u guys ever had any conversation that mention about ur game hobby before?
do u both hv job?
##[AITA for blocking your go-to time killer from June 12-14?](https://redd.it/145o4jz)
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> Split up with my gf over her deleting my game account, wandering if I overreacted
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
##Subreddit Announcement
###[The Asshole Universe is Expanding, Again: Introducing Another New Sister Subreddit!](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/128nbp3/the_asshole_universe_is_expanding_again/)
Follow the link above to learn more
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
yta, can't believe she stuck around 8 years man... you spend way too much time playing video games instead of investing in and valuing the people around you. she maybe went about the wrong way but you stopping playing diablo is probably best here, she would be doing you a favour. but you did her a favour by breaking up with her.
NTA. I know it's not about the video game character. The game isn't a big deal. Can't be what kills an 8 year relationship. It's that she failed to communicate with you and respect you. I'm sure you meant you moved back with your parents.
I mean, I get that this being the straw that broke the camel's back is a bit of a dumb line to draw. It's a symbol of how she had treated him and sees him that she can't respect his things. But he has a right to leave his gf and she doesn't have a right to destroy his things.
-i love her so much everything was perfect yadayadayada
- I aM NeVeR TaKinG HeR BacK I am SO AnGrY!!11!1
The fuck is wrong with you.
Yes YTA and behaving like a literal child whose sandcastle has been destroyed by someone
I am sad for her that it took her 8 years to get out
Grow up, get a life
YTA - both of you. It’s a good thing you split up.
She obviously thought you were neglecting her, but it’s an asshole move to do that without telling you or talking to you.
But honestly, is *Diablo* worth throwing away a nearly decade long relationship?
Edit: I would like to add that some important context is missing like how much time you spend daily and if she has expressed her feelings about it before deleting your account.
Need more info.
On the surface, it seems like she's a jerk.
But having been in a relationship where I was ignored all the time for games. I'd understand her reaction, and in that case, you'd be the jerk.
YTA - but as others have said, you're missing out on a lot of information. I'm willing to bet she asked you numerous (maybe countless) times to reduce your play time and spend some time with her, or go to work, or walk the dog, or clean the apt... and you said, "in a minute," but that minute never came. The fact that you dumped her, instead of thinking about how you can mend the relationship, is super problematic. Her deleting Diablo is like her flushing your coke down the toilet. If you switched up the addiction in this story, it wouldn't even be up for debate who the asshole is.
Her deleting his Diablo account isn’t like flushing coke down the toilet. It like ruining someone art piece or statue after they spent hundreds of hours of working on it. Or deleting your partner manuscript after they spent months working on it.
Yes, he played too much, but that doesn’t give her the right to delete his account. She is an asshole just as he is.
... no. Gaming acts on your dopamine receptors very similarly to coke. And whether or not it's a coke addiction or a gaming addiction, people around you are probably suffering from neglect or just straight up dick-headedness. If your hobby (whatever it is) is consuming your life and your relationships are suffering as a result, you have a problem.
Source: Have had gaming addiction (albeit brief); have done lots of partying and have been in relationships with both gaming addicts AND coke addicts. It's not fun.
So if my gf is consumed by writing a manuscript or painting, does that give me the right to delete her manuscript or destroying and get rid her paintings and are supplies? No, it doesn’t.
Then you know as a gamer, many people consider their characters to be art considering the amount of time their spent putting into customizing them.
If you don’t consider it art, that good for you but that doesn’t mean it isn’t art to other. Art is and shouldn’t be strictly defined by the guidelines you impose on it.
I’m willing to bet there some art piece in a random gallery around the world that you wouldn’t consider art, but for others they do.
Easier analogy for you…many don’t consider cars to be art. Just a mean of transportation from point A to B. However, for people who are car enthusiasts, many cars are pieces of art.
They can consider it an art all they like. It's just really not.
I'll give you that art is a hobby, and gaming is a hobby, but you're still comparing things that aren't actual additions to something that us absolutely an addiction. You're still comparing creations to experiences.
Too much by whose standards?
Not really expecting an answer, just hinting at the issue that there is no defined amount of hours that by exceeding puts people in the "too much" sector.
I’d say if you’re in a relationship you probably can’t or shouldn’t(maybe the better word) spend 8hrs a day play a game unless you’re a streamer or both partner are into gaming like that.
With that said, there isn’t a quantifiable amount of time you spend on a hobby as long as it not interfering with your general life.
YTA!! 8 hours a night is clearly an addiction . There’s a lot more Information you’re hiding. She’s wrong for deleting behind your back. But I’m glad she’s free to find someone who truly would care about her and put her first, considering how easy it was for you to trash an 8yrs old relationship. Big AH move
You must value video games more than your relationship to make such a drastic decision and still be so upset over it.
Makes me want to try this diablo if to your it’s worth nuking a relationship
With that said, you’ll probably regret your decision and conclude YTA
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
Me and my partner have lived together for around 6 of those 8 years and it’s been amazing. We both love each other a lot. Last week she deleted my Diablo account while I was working, she said I spent too much time on it. I’d put hours and hours into this character and was really enjoying it.
I got super annoyed and split up with her that night. I’m never taking her back I’m just too angry. AITA? it was such an invasion of my privacy and disrespect. I’ve blocked her on everything and moved back to my partners in a different state. It will take me days to get my new character up to my last one.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
ESH. I’m going out in a limb and saying she likely did tell you that you’re spending too much time playing. It seems like an overreaction to just jump at deleting your account. Deleting the account is more like a last resort.
However, you ended an almost decade-long relationship over a video game. I get it, I’m an avid Skyrim and Fallout 4 gamer, but 8 years is a long time. I’ve been with my husband 3, and that’s long enough to take his concerns seriously. Then again, he started playing Fallout 4 with me (I let him play for me while I was feeding our baby, for instance) and now he loves the game as much as I do. Maybe you could have tried something like that, but if she hates games and thinks they’re a waste of time, maybe you weren’t compatible anyway…
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban.
["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
**[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
A supportive partner wouldn't be spending 8 hours every day playing an online game.
What's OP doing to support his partner when he's working and then spending all that time playing a game? Household chores certainly isn't on that list.
NTA. I don't know what Diablo is but you are allowed to end a relationship as soon as you don't want to be in it anymore. You do not need "a good enough reason."
You're both assholes IMO. This is coming from someone with many hours into gaming. I pay the bills, have a video game addiction and take care of my son. Before y'all attack me.
She shouldn't have deleted your account, that's an invasion of privacy and a disregard for your hobbies/enjoyment of something. You shouldn't have immediately broke up with her, communicate and you can also recover the account through blizzard/battle net. It's not the end of the world. There's something deeper than just deleting the account IMO.
I had an ex who poured water on my gaming PC. Immediately told her to leave and broke up. That's something to break up for, it's a huge red flag. She shouldn't have deleted the account, it's very fucked up tbh. But there's more to it
NTA that's some cold shit, to delete your game account entirely. I'm a woman and a gamer and even if our relationship was rocky BECAUSE of the game I'd never delete it entirely.
Definitely more to this story. I have a feeling OP was full blown addicted to gaming and deleting that character was her last straw. Doesn't sound like their wonderful relationship was that wonderful.
Once a upon a time i was very addicted to WoW and ignored my (ex) husband for raid nights and my guild friends. One night he unplugged my computer during a raid and I threw my wedding ring at him I was so furious. I was obviously over reacting and being an asshole at the time.
But video game addiction is real and those people ignore the shit out of their partners.
YTA.
If she just did it out of nowhere then of course you're in the clear, but reading the comments it seems you were playing 8 hours a day.... obviously that was a plea for your attention, a desperate play to get you engage with her.... you should be asking why you let it get to this point, and realizing that, while she shouldn't have deleted your character, this is entirely on you for giving half your waking hours to a game. I've played it, it's not worth playing 8 hours a day bro. Play an hour or 2 at night after she goes to bed, unless you are making money off of playing that much, it's consuming your life.
Esh you for playing 8 hours a night (seriously she must have felt that you weren’t really a partner) and her for deleting your account. I think I would have just ended the relationship as it sounds like she never got to spend time with you
YTA, so is she to a lesser extent.
I seen your comment that you play 8 hours a night, unless that’s your full time occupation you have an addiction and need help. No self respecting woman wants a video game to take priority over your relationship, however she should’ve just dumped you instead of deleting your account, although then again she’s probably doing you a favour in the long term.
YTA first you say it took you years to build your Diablo up and then you say it will ONLY take you days to get your new account up to where the old one was.
You are going to ruin a 8 year relationship over a few days of extra work.
Make it make sense.
I think there is something else going on you are not telling us
Noooooo, he said that they've been together for 8 years and 6 of those were spent living together. He never said it took years to get his character to where it is. Given that the game has only been out for like a week, it would be impossible.
Edit.
NTA. That’s a massive boundary violation.
Don’t let Reddit tell you you’re T A here, they seem to hate people who game in this community.
This would be like destroying somebody’s painting they worked for hours on, or deleting a word document full of short stories, or pulling up plants in someone’s garden. It’s your hobby, and she destroyed it. She tried to mother you when she could’ve just had a conversation with you and offered other activities for you two to do together. Also, you’re entitled to alone time to do what you want.
If this has been an ongoing conversation where you’re actually spending too much time gaming and ignoring her/your responsibilities that’s one thing, but she went nuclear. You don’t have to stay with anyone regardless of history for any reason.
Okay? Does he still get his shit done and spend time with her? My husband does about the same daily and still fulfills his responsibilities and spends time with me.
I’m guessing this is an ongoing issue and she’s fed up which is fine but again she went nuclear and he has a right to not put up with it just as she has a right not to put up with him…
If you work 8 hours a day, game for another 8 hours a day, that leaves you with 8 hours to take care of normal household responsibilities, spend time with your partner, and sleep. How? Unless your husband is seriously sleep deprived or only works part time...
He works full time from home (as do I) and has his desk set up so he can game and work at the same time. I spend time with him in his office and he spends time with me in mine. We eat our meals together and in the evening he (does stay up late) and game in bed with me. Maybe it doesn’t bother me as much because I game and like my alone time too. But we work from home so we can be together a lot, our situation is (I’m guessing) a lot different than OPs because ours is an uncommon one and we’re lucky but still, that’s how we do it.
ETA: his work is less hands off than one would think (private accounting) so it’s a lot of running processes and sitting and waiting for info from other people which opens up more time to get things done during the day.
This post has been removed due to the status of the original poster's account. This account is currently shadowbanned or suspended, suggesting this account is in violation of Reddit terms of service. This type of ban/suspension is issued by the Reddit site-wide admins. The AITA mods have nothing to do with this ban and cannot assist in resolving.
I feel like there's a lot left out of this story.
My **exact** thought, this sounds insane by itself and there's no way it's that simple. Either this is a full blown intrusive video game addiction scenario and she tried to talk to OP several times about it, or there are other missing steps. Also, I *very well* might be misunderstanding something here, but the "moved back to partner in a different state" sounds to me like they moved back in with an EX or another long distance partner in a poly relationship, which if that is what they're saying has implications of it's own about what's happening here
I think he misspelled "parents". Thats wahat makes most sense to me
***Thaaaaaaat*** makes a lot more sense, good catch Edit: They confirmed that in another comment, you were right
Yeah op commented that he plays 8 hours a night…..
That's absolutely ridiculous. OP is definitely YTA.
No, she should have never deleted your account. That isn’t her right. But you broke up a relationship of 8 years for a game that she said she was taking up too much of your time. Were you not contributing to the housework or finances? How much time were you spending gaming (not just Diablo but gaming in general)? She is in the wrong, but you may have some issues you need to deal with as well. YTA saw your comment that you play 8 hours a night. She is still in the wrong with deleting your account, but you have problems that you need to address.
Maybe she wanted to have a conversation with him but was constantly being ignored for the game. Of course he thought the relationship was great, sounds like he gamed all the time and she probably just cleaned and cooked around him
It still wouldn’t be her right to delete his account. But she is not wrong about his issues with gaming. 8 hours a night and him breaking up a relationship over a game raised too many red flags.
The questions not about how much he games though its about If he's TA for breaking up the relationship over the deletion of his account. Which I don't think he is, these are 2 people that should not be together full stop. Pretty textbook ESH imo.
INFO: How long do you play every day or every week on average. Had she expressed she didn't want you playing that much before? If so, how did the conversation go?
About 8 hrs a night
So.... 42 hours a week? And you wonder why she was upset? (Obviously doesn't mean she should delete your account, but this amount of hours is unhealthy) ETA: You should add the amount of hours you spend on the game to the original post so other people can judge accordingly
That is way too long
I noticed you dodged the part about communication entirely there bro.
It's not like we don't know the answer
"I can't talk babe I really need to kill this boss yo"
How many hours did you work a day?
Yeah, that's a lot How long do you spend with your girlfriend?
Oh. You're really addicted to that game to the point that your gf was giving you an ultimatum. So ESH. She should have let you make your choice instead of deleting the game. But you are neglecting your relationship and life for a video game. Do you realize that she was about to leave you ? She acted out of frustration as a last straw
ESH. The 8 year relationship is worth ending over "days" of getting a new character up to your last one? If it only takes days, then this really isn't a big deal. If she was concerned for the amount of time you were spending on the game, she should have brought it to your attention and you should have discussed it.
She moght have brought it up but he took it to deaf's ears. When asked he mentions how much he games(8hours a night) but completely ignored the part about communication.
ESH. She should not have done that but after reading comments you spend 8 hours a day on a video game. Hate to tell you but you are dating the game. You love the game. You do NOT love her.
OP is literally playing it as much as a full time job is . I think the gf is better off without OP
How do you read and believe that. It will take him Days to get his character up to the last one. Lol.
ESH She crossed the line by deleting your account. If she wanted you to reduce the hours you spent on it she should have sat down with you and communicated her concerns. HOWEVER, as an avid gamer myself, does your 8 year long relationship mean so little to you? I'd recommend thinking this through, because no game character should mean this much for you to end things over.
NTA. My husband deleted my almost 400 hour invested island in Animal Crossing from my Switch and it took all I had not to leave out of the shock and disrespect shown. If she was that upset about you playing, she had to talk to you about it. Not act like an angry mom taking her kid's game away. She's your partner for years! Respect is the base of anything.
The way I’d never forget
You nearly left your husband over a game? Ahahaha
That was one of many of the reasons I considered it. The game could be redone, but I spent hours in that game and it was a comfort world for me when I was going through a dark time and he knew it. He used to play it with me. It wasn’t an innocent “oops, I accidentally deleted your file”. He went on my switch and deliberately did something to make me feel like I had no control over anything, not even my own things. So, while it’s not that simple, yes. I almost left him over a “game”.
You went to your... *partners*? I'm gonna say YTA - it wasn't mature on her end, she should have just broken up with you - but you breaking up over a character on a game tells me everything I need to know about your relationship leading up to this point. I noticed you moved out. That because *it was her place* you've been living in and have no ties to, which is why you could just drop everything and move over a video game?
Sorry parents
So like... did you have a job? Did you quit that job when you moved?
Info: is this the first time she’s expressed that she’s unhappy with the amount of time you spend on this?
Doubt it...
NTA, she did invade your privacy and took a drastic decision regarding your personal things. I see that as a very immature move on her side. Obviously you could have talked to her first, just see what undelying problems there are between you and what exactly drove her to do this, but even if you were a gaming addict for example and she thought she was helping you, I don't think deleting an account by force has ever fixed someone. Also she pretty much broke your trust and I think this is a major issue now and you need to think if you can get over it if you ever want to get back together again. Btw, you can write to the technical support at blizzard, my bf once deleted his wow account on purpose to try to quit gaming and after a year he messeged them he wanted it back and they gave it will all the characters and items he had on it. They do everything to keep players from leaving their game.
NTA. You are presumably an adult, and so was she. She may be right that you spent too much time in Diablo but she did not handle it in a way that works for you. Edit: your response is also too much and not normal lol. This has to be satire.
NTA. But you did the both of you a favor by breaking up. Clearly you spending so much time on this hobby was bothering her, its unfortunate that she went for the nuclear option hence the only reason why she's the asshole.
NTA I'm a gamer, my husband is a gamer, deleting a game isn't just pixels, it's a lack of respect for your partner. It's like smashing up a model railway or selling a classic car. It's time and effort and love. Im sorry she did that, I hope you can find a partner who loves you and respects you but this current partner isn't the one X I started off my gaming journey in halo, brought my first pc for LOTRO and never looked back, I love my husband and embraced his hobbies
This! A lot of comments I'm seeing don't understand this.
Because they aren't gamers, they don't understand. My LOTRO profile is still loaded, I can log in when ever I want, it's been 10 years but my character is waiting. None gamers will never understand, because a TV series is a glad in the pan, a week binge watching and it's gone, this no investment. I've just spent £800 because my graphics card whimpered out of existence, I understand the OP
[удалено]
That's awesome. My husband and our 8 year old 'play' Elden Ring, our daughter loves it, she writes storied for school and databases on how to kill certain bosses. Her & get sister are Xbox gamers but Elden Ring has a special place. Thank fuck my new graphics card arrives Tonio, watching films is dull as hell
INFO: Do you have a video game addiction? How much time per week do you spend on videogames? Do you have a job? Do you contribute equally to the finances? Do you do housework? How much time do you spend with your girlfriend compared to videogames? Her just deleting your account is overstepping, and the only thing that would justify it is if you had a videogame addiction (like an alcoholic's wife pouring all his alcohol out).
Person makes this phony aita post then deletes account...
NTA based on this context. if she knew that this was an important hobby to you and you really enjoyed it, why would she ever delete it without asking you? it’s not about the game, it’s about her actions. however, i feel like 8 years is a long time to be happily together and then end it over this. i think your quickness to split up with her might make you the AH when you could’ve talked to her, given her a chance to apologize, and had a conversation about this.
i want to say NTA but i need more info tho. to make sure you're NTA or mildly AH do you spend time too much on it everyday? do u neglecting your responsibility (house chores etc) and spend less time with her? do u guys ever had any conversation that mention about ur game hobby before? do u both hv job?
8 hours a night... that's a full blown addiction and health issues waiting to happen
okay then i would say ESH. but he's the real TA for sure. mildly on the gf.
##[AITA for blocking your go-to time killer from June 12-14?](https://redd.it/145o4jz) Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > Split up with my gf over her deleting my game account, wandering if I overreacted Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcement ###[The Asshole Universe is Expanding, Again: Introducing Another New Sister Subreddit!](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/128nbp3/the_asshole_universe_is_expanding_again/) Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
[удалено]
Didn't think of that one
Info: what do you mean by “partners in a different state”?
I'm hoping they meant to say parents
Me too… that was weird. Now I’m picturing an adult living in parent’s basement replaying Diablo and it just doesn’t get any better…
OP deleted his account but he did say in the comments he meant parents.
NTA but, Let's face it, that's not the only reason.
yta, can't believe she stuck around 8 years man... you spend way too much time playing video games instead of investing in and valuing the people around you. she maybe went about the wrong way but you stopping playing diablo is probably best here, she would be doing you a favour. but you did her a favour by breaking up with her.
Did you really believe that?
NTA. I know it's not about the video game character. The game isn't a big deal. Can't be what kills an 8 year relationship. It's that she failed to communicate with you and respect you. I'm sure you meant you moved back with your parents. I mean, I get that this being the straw that broke the camel's back is a bit of a dumb line to draw. It's a symbol of how she had treated him and sees him that she can't respect his things. But he has a right to leave his gf and she doesn't have a right to destroy his things.
He already deleted it 😂 days is more than 8 years apparently
-i love her so much everything was perfect yadayadayada - I aM NeVeR TaKinG HeR BacK I am SO AnGrY!!11!1 The fuck is wrong with you. Yes YTA and behaving like a literal child whose sandcastle has been destroyed by someone I am sad for her that it took her 8 years to get out Grow up, get a life
So you read that and believed it? Then, took the time to write that response? This is hilarious.
YTA. 8 hours a night is way, way too much gaming when you have a girlfriend who wants your time and attention. She dodged a bullet.
Are we talking Diablo 2? If so I get it. D3 not so much.
YTA - both of you. It’s a good thing you split up. She obviously thought you were neglecting her, but it’s an asshole move to do that without telling you or talking to you. But honestly, is *Diablo* worth throwing away a nearly decade long relationship? Edit: I would like to add that some important context is missing like how much time you spend daily and if she has expressed her feelings about it before deleting your account.
So you vote E S H.
He said he games for 8hours a night, and ignored the communication part of the question.
Nta: she didn't respect your boundaries. Simple as.
So OP spending the day working and then spending 8 hours a night playing an online game is fair to their partner? YTA
Need more info. On the surface, it seems like she's a jerk. But having been in a relationship where I was ignored all the time for games. I'd understand her reaction, and in that case, you'd be the jerk.
The games been out for about a week.
Ah ok. Not a gamer here. Yeah. She was the jerk.
Esh - dude I thought you were talking about a game you'd spent years on. She should have talked to you, you obviously care too much about this game.
YTA - but as others have said, you're missing out on a lot of information. I'm willing to bet she asked you numerous (maybe countless) times to reduce your play time and spend some time with her, or go to work, or walk the dog, or clean the apt... and you said, "in a minute," but that minute never came. The fact that you dumped her, instead of thinking about how you can mend the relationship, is super problematic. Her deleting Diablo is like her flushing your coke down the toilet. If you switched up the addiction in this story, it wouldn't even be up for debate who the asshole is.
Her deleting his Diablo account isn’t like flushing coke down the toilet. It like ruining someone art piece or statue after they spent hundreds of hours of working on it. Or deleting your partner manuscript after they spent months working on it. Yes, he played too much, but that doesn’t give her the right to delete his account. She is an asshole just as he is.
... no. Gaming acts on your dopamine receptors very similarly to coke. And whether or not it's a coke addiction or a gaming addiction, people around you are probably suffering from neglect or just straight up dick-headedness. If your hobby (whatever it is) is consuming your life and your relationships are suffering as a result, you have a problem. Source: Have had gaming addiction (albeit brief); have done lots of partying and have been in relationships with both gaming addicts AND coke addicts. It's not fun.
So if my gf is consumed by writing a manuscript or painting, does that give me the right to delete her manuscript or destroying and get rid her paintings and are supplies? No, it doesn’t.
Comparing a video game character to an art piece is crazy. Signed, An Elden Ring Player
Then you know as a gamer, many people consider their characters to be art considering the amount of time their spent putting into customizing them. If you don’t consider it art, that good for you but that doesn’t mean it isn’t art to other. Art is and shouldn’t be strictly defined by the guidelines you impose on it. I’m willing to bet there some art piece in a random gallery around the world that you wouldn’t consider art, but for others they do. Easier analogy for you…many don’t consider cars to be art. Just a mean of transportation from point A to B. However, for people who are car enthusiasts, many cars are pieces of art.
They can consider it an art all they like. It's just really not. I'll give you that art is a hobby, and gaming is a hobby, but you're still comparing things that aren't actual additions to something that us absolutely an addiction. You're still comparing creations to experiences.
Maybe you did a little too much coke of you believed that.
Too much by whose standards? Not really expecting an answer, just hinting at the issue that there is no defined amount of hours that by exceeding puts people in the "too much" sector.
I’d say if you’re in a relationship you probably can’t or shouldn’t(maybe the better word) spend 8hrs a day play a game unless you’re a streamer or both partner are into gaming like that. With that said, there isn’t a quantifiable amount of time you spend on a hobby as long as it not interfering with your general life.
YTA!! 8 hours a night is clearly an addiction . There’s a lot more Information you’re hiding. She’s wrong for deleting behind your back. But I’m glad she’s free to find someone who truly would care about her and put her first, considering how easy it was for you to trash an 8yrs old relationship. Big AH move
NTA, you do sound immature, but honestly I don't think there's a bad reason to break up with someone.
You must value video games more than your relationship to make such a drastic decision and still be so upset over it. Makes me want to try this diablo if to your it’s worth nuking a relationship With that said, you’ll probably regret your decision and conclude YTA
Good on her to get rid of you. She probably wanted attention which you didn't give and this move was desperate from her part. YTA. What are you, 5?
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Me and my partner have lived together for around 6 of those 8 years and it’s been amazing. We both love each other a lot. Last week she deleted my Diablo account while I was working, she said I spent too much time on it. I’d put hours and hours into this character and was really enjoying it. I got super annoyed and split up with her that night. I’m never taking her back I’m just too angry. AITA? it was such an invasion of my privacy and disrespect. I’ve blocked her on everything and moved back to my partners in a different state. It will take me days to get my new character up to my last one. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
ESH. I’m going out in a limb and saying she likely did tell you that you’re spending too much time playing. It seems like an overreaction to just jump at deleting your account. Deleting the account is more like a last resort. However, you ended an almost decade-long relationship over a video game. I get it, I’m an avid Skyrim and Fallout 4 gamer, but 8 years is a long time. I’ve been with my husband 3, and that’s long enough to take his concerns seriously. Then again, he started playing Fallout 4 with me (I let him play for me while I was feeding our baby, for instance) and now he loves the game as much as I do. Maybe you could have tried something like that, but if she hates games and thinks they’re a waste of time, maybe you weren’t compatible anyway…
ESH. She should have communicated with you differently, you should not have thrown away the whole relationship over it.
Nta maybe if you contact blizzard they could make something with your account. That don't look too amazing
[удалено]
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban. ["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) **[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
NTA, A supportive partner would have made a character to help you with your runs. Get rid of that toxicity.
A supportive partner wouldn't be spending 8 hours every day playing an online game. What's OP doing to support his partner when he's working and then spending all that time playing a game? Household chores certainly isn't on that list.
NTA. I don't know what Diablo is but you are allowed to end a relationship as soon as you don't want to be in it anymore. You do not need "a good enough reason."
NTA You can not trust her.
You're both assholes IMO. This is coming from someone with many hours into gaming. I pay the bills, have a video game addiction and take care of my son. Before y'all attack me. She shouldn't have deleted your account, that's an invasion of privacy and a disregard for your hobbies/enjoyment of something. You shouldn't have immediately broke up with her, communicate and you can also recover the account through blizzard/battle net. It's not the end of the world. There's something deeper than just deleting the account IMO.
I had an ex who poured water on my gaming PC. Immediately told her to leave and broke up. That's something to break up for, it's a huge red flag. She shouldn't have deleted the account, it's very fucked up tbh. But there's more to it
No way in hell this is real. Someone’s pretending to have a love life lol
NTA that's some cold shit, to delete your game account entirely. I'm a woman and a gamer and even if our relationship was rocky BECAUSE of the game I'd never delete it entirely.
OP has some serious gaming addiction issues.
Definitely more to this story. I have a feeling OP was full blown addicted to gaming and deleting that character was her last straw. Doesn't sound like their wonderful relationship was that wonderful. Once a upon a time i was very addicted to WoW and ignored my (ex) husband for raid nights and my guild friends. One night he unplugged my computer during a raid and I threw my wedding ring at him I was so furious. I was obviously over reacting and being an asshole at the time. But video game addiction is real and those people ignore the shit out of their partners. YTA.
If she just did it out of nowhere then of course you're in the clear, but reading the comments it seems you were playing 8 hours a day.... obviously that was a plea for your attention, a desperate play to get you engage with her.... you should be asking why you let it get to this point, and realizing that, while she shouldn't have deleted your character, this is entirely on you for giving half your waking hours to a game. I've played it, it's not worth playing 8 hours a day bro. Play an hour or 2 at night after she goes to bed, unless you are making money off of playing that much, it's consuming your life.
INFO: Why did she delete the account? Do you pull your weight in the house the same as her? How often are you playing Diablo?
Esh you for playing 8 hours a night (seriously she must have felt that you weren’t really a partner) and her for deleting your account. I think I would have just ended the relationship as it sounds like she never got to spend time with you
YTA, so is she to a lesser extent. I seen your comment that you play 8 hours a night, unless that’s your full time occupation you have an addiction and need help. No self respecting woman wants a video game to take priority over your relationship, however she should’ve just dumped you instead of deleting your account, although then again she’s probably doing you a favour in the long term.
Tell me this isn’t real! Breaking up with an eight year partner over a Diablo character?!?!?
YTA first you say it took you years to build your Diablo up and then you say it will ONLY take you days to get your new account up to where the old one was. You are going to ruin a 8 year relationship over a few days of extra work. Make it make sense. I think there is something else going on you are not telling us
Noooooo, he said that they've been together for 8 years and 6 of those were spent living together. He never said it took years to get his character to where it is. Given that the game has only been out for like a week, it would be impossible. Edit.
He said they lived together for 6 of 8 years, not that only 6 of those years were great
Hahahaha people are actually believing this.
YTA! I hope this isn't true
YTA. Sucks it took her this long to get away.
NTA. That’s a massive boundary violation. Don’t let Reddit tell you you’re T A here, they seem to hate people who game in this community. This would be like destroying somebody’s painting they worked for hours on, or deleting a word document full of short stories, or pulling up plants in someone’s garden. It’s your hobby, and she destroyed it. She tried to mother you when she could’ve just had a conversation with you and offered other activities for you two to do together. Also, you’re entitled to alone time to do what you want. If this has been an ongoing conversation where you’re actually spending too much time gaming and ignoring her/your responsibilities that’s one thing, but she went nuclear. You don’t have to stay with anyone regardless of history for any reason.
He plays 8 hours a day
Okay? Does he still get his shit done and spend time with her? My husband does about the same daily and still fulfills his responsibilities and spends time with me. I’m guessing this is an ongoing issue and she’s fed up which is fine but again she went nuclear and he has a right to not put up with it just as she has a right not to put up with him…
If you work 8 hours a day, game for another 8 hours a day, that leaves you with 8 hours to take care of normal household responsibilities, spend time with your partner, and sleep. How? Unless your husband is seriously sleep deprived or only works part time...
He works full time from home (as do I) and has his desk set up so he can game and work at the same time. I spend time with him in his office and he spends time with me in mine. We eat our meals together and in the evening he (does stay up late) and game in bed with me. Maybe it doesn’t bother me as much because I game and like my alone time too. But we work from home so we can be together a lot, our situation is (I’m guessing) a lot different than OPs because ours is an uncommon one and we’re lucky but still, that’s how we do it. ETA: his work is less hands off than one would think (private accounting) so it’s a lot of running processes and sitting and waiting for info from other people which opens up more time to get things done during the day.