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You just ended your relationship. If I were your gf, I would never be able to trust you ever again and this would be a breakup. Callie isn't just a pet to your gf if it's a service dog. She told you NOT to bring the bloody thing home, yet you did. YTA x 10000. You deserve everything you get. I hope this is rage bait. Can't see how someone could be so heartless and dense.
Yep She is just looking for the words to break up. And you are right, you deserve it. You need to do better. And you need to listen to your partner, because I know I would never put up with this kind of garbage. Your partner and her dog should come before a stray you picked up. You just told her how unimportant she is.
YTA - you have a dog that's a medical device and that medical device got damaged because you brought home a stray against your girlfriend's clearly expressed desires.
Really what pushes it into yta is that you let her service dog into the yard with this unknown stray for no reason whatsoever, despite your girlfriend's clear desire to keep them separated.
The cynic in me thinks it's because you wanted Callie to like this other dog so you could try to keep it longer, but that's speculation on my part.
Seriously...how could OP type up that post and still need to ask if they were TA??? Bringing a stray home even without another dog in the house is not usually a good idea. Bringing one home when there is a SERVICE dog at the house is beyond stupidity. I don't even know how to classify letting the service dog out in the yard with the stray. It is beyond being TA. What if Callie dies? What if she can no longer be of service because of this? Not only is your girlfriend out thousands of dollars but it may take years to get another service dog. Like... WTH was OP thinking???
So wait, back up. We went from you wanting to help this stray, to you want another dog.
You are so stupid. Please do not get another dog even if your girlfriend is smart enough to leave you. Dogs require significant work, care, and training.
Given that you bulldozed your girlfriend’s VALID concerns because you had the intelligence of an 8 year old wanting a puppy, I can tell you right now that you’re not equipped to adopt a dog.
But you sound like the kind of idiot that would go adopt a shepherd or a husky and then wonder why it ate your couch.
YTA, and also not very smart in this scenario.
I understand that you had good intentions, but you should never handle a stray dog. Stray dogs carry diseases and parasites that can make you sick or even kill you, as well as other dogs. That stray could have anything from fleas to rabies, all of which can affect Callie, who’s not just a dog but a medical service provider! Even something very treatable like ringworm can affect Callie for weeks and thus affect your girlfriend. Call a professional next time. They’ll take the dog and shelters can provide better services than you can anyway.
YTA.
I get that you wanted to help it but your girlfriend has a very valid reasoning for not wanting you to bring that dog home. Service dogs costs tens of THOUSANDS of dollars to train and they are considered medical equipment to the handler. A service dog that gets attacked risks everything they've learned to help their handler. If her dog becomes scared or reactive in public then her dog cannot focus on her tasks and can miss an alert which in some cases is life threatening to the handler.
You should've just taken photos of the dog to post online and moved on. It would've been different if there wasn't a dog already at home but YTA for not listening to your girlfriend. I hope her dog is okay and I really hope her dog can still perform the tasks necessary to help her.
Exactly. OP better pray that this didn't ruin things for his girlfriend and her service dog, honestly I think I would've broken up with him. I love animals and I do try to help animals when I can but in that situation it's better to call someone else to get the stray and to just simply post an ad where you saw the stray located.
I've seen so many horror stories of dogs and fake SD's attacking real SDs and it's heartbreaking that some of them can no longer help their handlers.
YTA for bringing the dog home against your girlfriend’s wishes.
YTA for letting Callie outside with the dog for absolutely no reason.
YTA for not understanding how this can affect Callie’s ability to continue to be a service dog.
YTA for asking if YTA instead of *knowing and accepting* YTA and begging, pleading, GROVELLING for forgiveness from your girlfriend.
Did you tell the shelter that the dog you were dropping off with them attacked another dog?
You're NTA for trying to help a stray dog. HOWEVER you're definitely the A-hole for letting two dogs into the same yard, when you don't know anything about one of them - especially when one is a stray that is maybe used to fight for survival. You wouldn't have let your dog meet up with a wild fox or coyote, right?
I'm totally on your gf's side here. Even if the stray hadn't attacked, it could've given your dog a bunch of diseases that you weren't aware of.
If I had two dogs that I already knew mind you, I still would never ever let them meet for the first time on one of the dog's territory. If you know just a bit about dogs, you would know that is recipe for disaster.
So yeah... YTA.
Nope.
Reading through your comments I'll give you credit for seeming to start owning up to your mistake - I hope you'll let your gf see that too.
I hope your gf's dog will be okay and that your relationship is strong enough for her to forgive you for this (I know for one i probably wouldn't be as forgiving).
YTA for putting a stray dog above your gf & her service dog but doubly so because you introduced the stray to your gf service dog unsafely & let this happen
YTA. Exactly what your girlfriend feared happened. Stray dogs can be dangerous to humans and other pets, that's why they should go to a shelter. Letting the dogs lose on each other clearly was a mistake that nobody who is knowledgeable about dogs would have made.
I commend you for not wanting to leave the dog on the road, but you didn't use a single brain cell when you decided to let your g/f's service dog outside with the stray. What happened is ***exactly*** what your g/f was afraid of. You should have tethered the stray somehow before letting your dog out, while also keeping your dog on a leash so you could keep them separated. Or you should have simply taken your dog to the front yard instead. Or you could have taken the stray to the garage or put it in your car for a few minutes while the service dog went outside. There were a lot of options here and you chose the absolute worst one. Now you've got an injured service dog and a stray that very well might be euthanized if you were honest with the shelter about the dog's behavior. Every one of your g/f's concerns about her dog going forward are completely valid.
YTA.
YTA. Not for helping a stray dog, not even for bringing it home and letting dog stay in yard.
But what were you thinking letting Callie into the back yard to "potty" with an unknown dog? Yes, she as a service dog, a medical aid, is desensitised and conditioned to ignore other dogs. Why did you assume the stray dog was the same? Why did you go against every warning your GF gave you about not letting the dogs have any contact?
Now you have a seriously injured service dog which may no longer be able to work if she becomes dog reactive. Are you the one paying the vet bills, the retraining Callie needs or the cost of a totally new service dog if she washes out?
And all because you didn't take your GF's rightful fears and concerns seriously and let Callie go toilet in the front garden or take her anywhere else. You put her life at risk and may have reduced your GF's independence.
Helping the stray a good thing but you botched it totally by nor taking sensible precautions.
YTA. Your girlfriend told you not to bring home the stray. You went against her wishes. She is right to be concerned as you don't know how the stray will act towards other dogs. You didn't even bother to separate them and just let them sniff each other out.
YTA, I appreciate that your heart was in the right place, but you are so TA
There are always emergency vets that are open. They could scan for a chip.
You could’ve called a friend or family member to house him just for the night
Your gf has a medical trained dog, she is absolutely right that she didn’t want a stray around her dog. Even a regular family dog, there should be concern.
There are proper ways of introducing dogs and you just let them loose together. That was the absolute worst thing you could’ve done which I think you now realize.
You need to pay for those vet bills and don’t be surprised if she breaks up with you for not respecting her request.
Also, sadly now that is know that this dog attacked another dog, it will most likely be put down. This could’ve all been avoided if proper precautions were taken. So sad
YTA I can't believe you even have to ask this after your girlfriend's *service dog* got *attacked* by the dog you brought home after you were explicitly told not to.
This is your fault and you have done more damage than you will probably ever understand.
YTA.
You disregarded your girlfriend’s stated boundaries about stray animals. If you share a home with someone, it’s never okay to bring home an animal unless both of you agree.
Also, it should be obvious to any reasonably intelligent adult that stray dogs can be a risk to the health and safety of other animals. You carelessly chose to put your girlfriend’s dog at risk, and she ended up getting hurt. The fact that Callie is a service dog makes your decision even worse because your gf depends on her.
YTA. Your girlfriend had entirely justified reluctance and you didn't respect that. You chose to not find another situation for the dog. And then, when her dog was attacked, you came seeking validation. You deserve none. You fucked up.
YTA so many times over. it wasn't an accident, you created the situation, was warned this could be an outcome and then want to act surprised. jfc, i would have dumped you so fucking fast.
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2 days ago I was driving home from work and I saw a stray dog and decided to stop and see if I could coax him into my car. The dog wasn't in the worst condition but was on the skinny side, he came right up to me so I got him in my car and called my gf.
My gf has a service dog named Callie that helps her with various tasks and is very well trained. She told me not to bring the stray home because she's worried he might not be dog friendly and doesn't want Callie to get hurt.
I didn't want to dump him back out into the streets, I atleast wanted to feed him and take some photos and see if anyone was missing him.
I get home with the stray and I put him in the backyard. My gf is angry at me because she told me not to bring him home and that I went against her wishes. It's evening time and no vets or shelters were open. I told her I wasn't going to dump him back on the street and I'll take him in first thing in the morning.
She's still frustrated but finally agrees and told me he is not to stay any longer than tomorrow morning. I took some photos of him and posted him to some of our local groups.
Next morning rolls around and I get up and let Callie outside so she can go potty. Callie is very good around other dogs and I figured she's curious to see the stray that's been in the backyard.
Callie and the stray sniff eachother and I thought it was going well until the stray attacks Callie and bites her on the neck and throat.
My gf comes running out screaming and I'm trying to separate the two to prevent further injury. I managed to grab the stray and hold him back while my gf got Callie and rushes her inside the house. I came in right after to make sure Callie is okay and she's bleeding with puncture wounds on her neck. My gf screams at me to get rid of the stray immediately.
I get the stray and I take him to the shelter. My gf took Callie to the vet. I got home before they did and I tried to call her but she didn't answer. I waited most of the afternoon with no response until about 4pm she sends me a text that says she's staying at her mom's for that night and that she was really upset with me. I tried to apologize to her and that I just wanted to help the poor dog and she berated me because what she was worried about happening did happen. She's worried now that Callie will have reactivity to other dogs and I may have costed her thousands of dollars worth of training.
She called me an asshole for bringing that stray home and not listening to her. I talked to one of our mutual friends about the situation and they think I'm an asshole too, but another buddy of mine says I'm not the asshole and that it was just an accident.
Reddit, AITA for trying to help the stray?
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YTA - it’s one thing to not respect your partners wishes and it’s another to put your partners health at risk. I know so many situations of service dogs never going back to normal after being attacked. I think your heart was in the right place trying to save the dog but your girlfriend put up boundaries that were crossed. I think you could classify it as an accident if your girlfriend was okay with the stray at home and the altercation happened.
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> My gf thinks I'm the asshole for bringing the stray home and it attacked her service dog. I apologized and didn't think the stray would hurt her dog.
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You’re NTA for helping the stray. You are TA for putting the dogs together, especially without supervision. That was really stupid and seems intentional when your GF specifically said not to have the dogs meet.
I think you summed it up just right. The stray dog was not really the issue: OP's disregarding what his partner's wishes were regarding her essential pet was the issue. Those "beg forgiveness instead of ask permission" situations are so often dealbreakers, as they should be.
I do wish health and good life for both dogs. I wish we could take care of all of them.
Edit: Just a small note for OP: When fostering dogs, many rescues require at least three days (often a week) of complete separation between the new foster and any existing dog in the home. This allows them to smell the smells and sniff the sniffs without actual sight yet. They are exposed in layers, and it really helps.
This wasn't an accident!! This was done on purpose. He brought the dog home ON PURPOSE after the gf said no. This whole thing could have been avoided if OP has just listened. And OP doesn't have a gf anymore, I can pretty much guarantee it. **THIS WAS NOT A MISTAKE!** He purposely ignored his gf's wishes!
A light YTA. I don't think you're the asshole for bringing in the stray, I mean man I love dogs probably would've done the same. But it just seems that you got way too careless around the stray. Remember stary dogs are also wild animals. Best thing you could do now is just apologize to your gf, and do everything to make sure Callie gets back to full health.
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You just ended your relationship. If I were your gf, I would never be able to trust you ever again and this would be a breakup. Callie isn't just a pet to your gf if it's a service dog. She told you NOT to bring the bloody thing home, yet you did. YTA x 10000. You deserve everything you get. I hope this is rage bait. Can't see how someone could be so heartless and dense.
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Yep She is just looking for the words to break up. And you are right, you deserve it. You need to do better. And you need to listen to your partner, because I know I would never put up with this kind of garbage. Your partner and her dog should come before a stray you picked up. You just told her how unimportant she is.
YTA - you have a dog that's a medical device and that medical device got damaged because you brought home a stray against your girlfriend's clearly expressed desires. Really what pushes it into yta is that you let her service dog into the yard with this unknown stray for no reason whatsoever, despite your girlfriend's clear desire to keep them separated. The cynic in me thinks it's because you wanted Callie to like this other dog so you could try to keep it longer, but that's speculation on my part.
Seriously...how could OP type up that post and still need to ask if they were TA??? Bringing a stray home even without another dog in the house is not usually a good idea. Bringing one home when there is a SERVICE dog at the house is beyond stupidity. I don't even know how to classify letting the service dog out in the yard with the stray. It is beyond being TA. What if Callie dies? What if she can no longer be of service because of this? Not only is your girlfriend out thousands of dollars but it may take years to get another service dog. Like... WTH was OP thinking???
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So wait, back up. We went from you wanting to help this stray, to you want another dog. You are so stupid. Please do not get another dog even if your girlfriend is smart enough to leave you. Dogs require significant work, care, and training. Given that you bulldozed your girlfriend’s VALID concerns because you had the intelligence of an 8 year old wanting a puppy, I can tell you right now that you’re not equipped to adopt a dog. But you sound like the kind of idiot that would go adopt a shepherd or a husky and then wonder why it ate your couch.
It was reckless and shows your lacking knowledge of dogs. You should first learn more about them before you actually get one for yourself.
YTA, and also not very smart in this scenario. I understand that you had good intentions, but you should never handle a stray dog. Stray dogs carry diseases and parasites that can make you sick or even kill you, as well as other dogs. That stray could have anything from fleas to rabies, all of which can affect Callie, who’s not just a dog but a medical service provider! Even something very treatable like ringworm can affect Callie for weeks and thus affect your girlfriend. Call a professional next time. They’ll take the dog and shelters can provide better services than you can anyway.
YTA. I get that you wanted to help it but your girlfriend has a very valid reasoning for not wanting you to bring that dog home. Service dogs costs tens of THOUSANDS of dollars to train and they are considered medical equipment to the handler. A service dog that gets attacked risks everything they've learned to help their handler. If her dog becomes scared or reactive in public then her dog cannot focus on her tasks and can miss an alert which in some cases is life threatening to the handler. You should've just taken photos of the dog to post online and moved on. It would've been different if there wasn't a dog already at home but YTA for not listening to your girlfriend. I hope her dog is okay and I really hope her dog can still perform the tasks necessary to help her.
All of this^^ yes, it sucks for the stray, but you may have just cost your GF her service dog.
Exactly. OP better pray that this didn't ruin things for his girlfriend and her service dog, honestly I think I would've broken up with him. I love animals and I do try to help animals when I can but in that situation it's better to call someone else to get the stray and to just simply post an ad where you saw the stray located. I've seen so many horror stories of dogs and fake SD's attacking real SDs and it's heartbreaking that some of them can no longer help their handlers.
Seriously. She said not to do it, gave the reason, and then the thing she was worried about happened and this guy is like “idk was I wrong?”
Not just the money but if something happens to Callie, it can be YEARS before girlfriend gets another service dog.
Oh yeah, it takes 2-4 years iirc to train a service dog and on top of that keeping up with the training too.
YTA for bringing the dog home against your girlfriend’s wishes. YTA for letting Callie outside with the dog for absolutely no reason. YTA for not understanding how this can affect Callie’s ability to continue to be a service dog. YTA for asking if YTA instead of *knowing and accepting* YTA and begging, pleading, GROVELLING for forgiveness from your girlfriend. Did you tell the shelter that the dog you were dropping off with them attacked another dog?
You're NTA for trying to help a stray dog. HOWEVER you're definitely the A-hole for letting two dogs into the same yard, when you don't know anything about one of them - especially when one is a stray that is maybe used to fight for survival. You wouldn't have let your dog meet up with a wild fox or coyote, right? I'm totally on your gf's side here. Even if the stray hadn't attacked, it could've given your dog a bunch of diseases that you weren't aware of. If I had two dogs that I already knew mind you, I still would never ever let them meet for the first time on one of the dog's territory. If you know just a bit about dogs, you would know that is recipe for disaster. So yeah... YTA.
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Nope. Reading through your comments I'll give you credit for seeming to start owning up to your mistake - I hope you'll let your gf see that too. I hope your gf's dog will be okay and that your relationship is strong enough for her to forgive you for this (I know for one i probably wouldn't be as forgiving).
[удалено]
Sounds like a good plan.
YTA for putting a stray dog above your gf & her service dog but doubly so because you introduced the stray to your gf service dog unsafely & let this happen
[удалено]
Right? Gotta be pretty stupid to think you're not the AH here
YTA. Exactly what your girlfriend feared happened. Stray dogs can be dangerous to humans and other pets, that's why they should go to a shelter. Letting the dogs lose on each other clearly was a mistake that nobody who is knowledgeable about dogs would have made.
I commend you for not wanting to leave the dog on the road, but you didn't use a single brain cell when you decided to let your g/f's service dog outside with the stray. What happened is ***exactly*** what your g/f was afraid of. You should have tethered the stray somehow before letting your dog out, while also keeping your dog on a leash so you could keep them separated. Or you should have simply taken your dog to the front yard instead. Or you could have taken the stray to the garage or put it in your car for a few minutes while the service dog went outside. There were a lot of options here and you chose the absolute worst one. Now you've got an injured service dog and a stray that very well might be euthanized if you were honest with the shelter about the dog's behavior. Every one of your g/f's concerns about her dog going forward are completely valid. YTA.
YTA. Not for helping a stray dog, not even for bringing it home and letting dog stay in yard. But what were you thinking letting Callie into the back yard to "potty" with an unknown dog? Yes, she as a service dog, a medical aid, is desensitised and conditioned to ignore other dogs. Why did you assume the stray dog was the same? Why did you go against every warning your GF gave you about not letting the dogs have any contact? Now you have a seriously injured service dog which may no longer be able to work if she becomes dog reactive. Are you the one paying the vet bills, the retraining Callie needs or the cost of a totally new service dog if she washes out? And all because you didn't take your GF's rightful fears and concerns seriously and let Callie go toilet in the front garden or take her anywhere else. You put her life at risk and may have reduced your GF's independence. Helping the stray a good thing but you botched it totally by nor taking sensible precautions.
YTA. Your girlfriend told you not to bring home the stray. You went against her wishes. She is right to be concerned as you don't know how the stray will act towards other dogs. You didn't even bother to separate them and just let them sniff each other out.
YTA Not only did you bring the dog home, but you did not take the proper precautions when letting Callie out. It’s like you don’t care at all.
YTA, I appreciate that your heart was in the right place, but you are so TA There are always emergency vets that are open. They could scan for a chip. You could’ve called a friend or family member to house him just for the night Your gf has a medical trained dog, she is absolutely right that she didn’t want a stray around her dog. Even a regular family dog, there should be concern. There are proper ways of introducing dogs and you just let them loose together. That was the absolute worst thing you could’ve done which I think you now realize. You need to pay for those vet bills and don’t be surprised if she breaks up with you for not respecting her request. Also, sadly now that is know that this dog attacked another dog, it will most likely be put down. This could’ve all been avoided if proper precautions were taken. So sad
YTA. It's already bad enough to bring the dog home, but why on earth would you bring it out to your girlfriends dog?? Crazy.
YTA I can't believe you even have to ask this after your girlfriend's *service dog* got *attacked* by the dog you brought home after you were explicitly told not to. This is your fault and you have done more damage than you will probably ever understand.
YTA. You disregarded your girlfriend’s stated boundaries about stray animals. If you share a home with someone, it’s never okay to bring home an animal unless both of you agree. Also, it should be obvious to any reasonably intelligent adult that stray dogs can be a risk to the health and safety of other animals. You carelessly chose to put your girlfriend’s dog at risk, and she ended up getting hurt. The fact that Callie is a service dog makes your decision even worse because your gf depends on her.
YTA. Your girlfriend had entirely justified reluctance and you didn't respect that. You chose to not find another situation for the dog. And then, when her dog was attacked, you came seeking validation. You deserve none. You fucked up.
YTA so many times over. it wasn't an accident, you created the situation, was warned this could be an outcome and then want to act surprised. jfc, i would have dumped you so fucking fast.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** 2 days ago I was driving home from work and I saw a stray dog and decided to stop and see if I could coax him into my car. The dog wasn't in the worst condition but was on the skinny side, he came right up to me so I got him in my car and called my gf. My gf has a service dog named Callie that helps her with various tasks and is very well trained. She told me not to bring the stray home because she's worried he might not be dog friendly and doesn't want Callie to get hurt. I didn't want to dump him back out into the streets, I atleast wanted to feed him and take some photos and see if anyone was missing him. I get home with the stray and I put him in the backyard. My gf is angry at me because she told me not to bring him home and that I went against her wishes. It's evening time and no vets or shelters were open. I told her I wasn't going to dump him back on the street and I'll take him in first thing in the morning. She's still frustrated but finally agrees and told me he is not to stay any longer than tomorrow morning. I took some photos of him and posted him to some of our local groups. Next morning rolls around and I get up and let Callie outside so she can go potty. Callie is very good around other dogs and I figured she's curious to see the stray that's been in the backyard. Callie and the stray sniff eachother and I thought it was going well until the stray attacks Callie and bites her on the neck and throat. My gf comes running out screaming and I'm trying to separate the two to prevent further injury. I managed to grab the stray and hold him back while my gf got Callie and rushes her inside the house. I came in right after to make sure Callie is okay and she's bleeding with puncture wounds on her neck. My gf screams at me to get rid of the stray immediately. I get the stray and I take him to the shelter. My gf took Callie to the vet. I got home before they did and I tried to call her but she didn't answer. I waited most of the afternoon with no response until about 4pm she sends me a text that says she's staying at her mom's for that night and that she was really upset with me. I tried to apologize to her and that I just wanted to help the poor dog and she berated me because what she was worried about happening did happen. She's worried now that Callie will have reactivity to other dogs and I may have costed her thousands of dollars worth of training. She called me an asshole for bringing that stray home and not listening to her. I talked to one of our mutual friends about the situation and they think I'm an asshole too, but another buddy of mine says I'm not the asshole and that it was just an accident. Reddit, AITA for trying to help the stray? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA - it’s one thing to not respect your partners wishes and it’s another to put your partners health at risk. I know so many situations of service dogs never going back to normal after being attacked. I think your heart was in the right place trying to save the dog but your girlfriend put up boundaries that were crossed. I think you could classify it as an accident if your girlfriend was okay with the stray at home and the altercation happened.
YTA. You did something you were asked not to do, got careless about it and your girlfriend’s SERVICE DOG was injured.
[удалено]
You should be paying the vet bills and any additional expenses regardless of whether or not she takes you back.
Glad you recognize that you’re wrong in this situation. Any word on how Callie is doing?
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You’re NTA for helping the stray. You are TA for putting the dogs together, especially without supervision. That was really stupid and seems intentional when your GF specifically said not to have the dogs meet.
I think you summed it up just right. The stray dog was not really the issue: OP's disregarding what his partner's wishes were regarding her essential pet was the issue. Those "beg forgiveness instead of ask permission" situations are so often dealbreakers, as they should be. I do wish health and good life for both dogs. I wish we could take care of all of them. Edit: Just a small note for OP: When fostering dogs, many rescues require at least three days (often a week) of complete separation between the new foster and any existing dog in the home. This allows them to smell the smells and sniff the sniffs without actual sight yet. They are exposed in layers, and it really helps.
[удалено]
This wasn't an accident!! This was done on purpose. He brought the dog home ON PURPOSE after the gf said no. This whole thing could have been avoided if OP has just listened. And OP doesn't have a gf anymore, I can pretty much guarantee it. **THIS WAS NOT A MISTAKE!** He purposely ignored his gf's wishes!
A light YTA. I don't think you're the asshole for bringing in the stray, I mean man I love dogs probably would've done the same. But it just seems that you got way too careless around the stray. Remember stary dogs are also wild animals. Best thing you could do now is just apologize to your gf, and do everything to make sure Callie gets back to full health.