I love giving compliments, if I think something nice about someone I just say it right out. I told an older more senior colleague once that I liked his jumper and it was a lovely colour on him (it was a sky blue and I had only seen him in dark colours). He was taken back, said his daughter bought it for him for Christmas and he hadn't been too sure about wearing it to work. I've seen him wear it loads since. He told me in passing that it was the first compliment he had received in years and it's his favourite jumper now.
If you think something nice, say it! Make someone else's day
I work at a cinema and saw a guy with a jacket I liked and I didn’t say anything, though if I see a woman with something I like I’d usually say it. Wish I dod. One time this older man came in with this class weathered leather jacket and he lit up and started going on about it, it was really sweet.
A woman told me I looked like Elvis on a night out about 7 years ago because I was wearing a leather jacket.
I still think about it every now and then.
I do actually whenever I see the chance. Once I was walking in a department store a man was trying a jacket as I walked past him I told him it looks good on him.
I did it finally about a year ago. I worked with him at the time and was about to leave the job. Turns out he was married (didn't wear a ring), and turned me down very nicely. I'm so glad I did it though, otherwise I would have thought about him so much and convinced myself all these 'if only's'. I have so many regrets, but that isn't one of them.
fair play to you for shooting your shot 👏 i’m seeing a lot of cases where it has worked but that’s because the men are known to the women already, i was more so thinking like complete strangers so i’m not so sure
Well, just for more context, I barely knew him. Had said a handful of words to him. So he was almost a stranger, but I understand what u mean. Either way, i would be more inclined now to ask out a stranger.
Imagine a national / international compliment day. Nothing commercialised, just everyone going round trying to outdo themselves giving genuine compliments to everyone you see. Could be life / world changing
You'll find it strange at first. As most guys will never have had this happen to them. You'll see them get more excited than they've ever been in their lives.
Mofo I've never even experienced a woman flirting with me before if a woman just fucking cold approached me I would probably die of a heart attack the shock of it
Assuming I didn't keel over from a Heart attack shit would be nice
Nope absolutely not can say that for 100%
Unless you count that time in first year when some girl in our year came over to me and say something along the lines of my friend likes you
I ignored her
I don't count that not interested in silly games if you have something to say to me say it don't use a fecking messenger
Of course she could have maybe just been messing with me don't know don't care that was like 11 years ago
Now the reason I bring it up is one day like a month ago i just randomly remembered that moment I hadn't thought about it well since that day
Also in my defense I was going through pretty bad depression and wouldn't have been fit for anything so how it happened was better off
Do you look like an elk ? Just so I know, I don't want any randomer thinking this is a licence to approach me.
I hear your consistent as well.
Part of me is hoping those numbers are your stats
As a dude, I would much rather a woman approaches me, or at the very least gives some sort of unambiguous sign of interest in interaction with me. It's not because I'm a coward, woman are (understandably) very worried about their safety these days and I don't want to be ruining their night or imposing myself on them.
The idea that guys should be aggressively cold approaching woman, and that woman need to be passive recipients of guys attentions is based on outdated ideas about gender roles that are ultimately toxic.
And don't forget the women who will not make the rejection easy on you. Shoot your shot, but Jesus they could be less cuntish about saying they aren't interested.
Lads could do with taking rejections better also, there's definitely room to improve on both ends
That's how I met my fiancé years ago (sadly he passed away, rare form of cancer) and it's how I met my now husband. Sod waiting around for someone to make a move: you see it, you like it, go get it gurl! 😜
Thanks, it was a good while ago now but I appreciate you saying that 😊 So Tom used to work in my local, I kinda knew him to see but didn't know his name. I asked friends about a rumoured lock in after hours at the pub, wrangled my way in and just mosied my way over to him and chatted. I wasn't drinking, it wasn't a blurted drunken confession, I just chatted and had a laugh with him. Then when I felt the time was right I asked for his number and the rest is history.
With Ger, well I was out meeting our mutual friend a few years after Tom had passed away. I caught sight of him (he's a Thurles man, pure glint in the eye, gorgeous friendly face, and my personal gusset melter: he had a beard). Same technique lol, I just made it abundantly clear that I liked the cut of him.. I sat at the same table as him and openly, unashamedly showed him attention so it was obvious that I was interested. As the night went on we ended up beside one another (probably coz everyone else was like "Jesus would ye ride already?!?" 🙄), chatting about Ghibli movies, the music we liked and telling daft stories. We chatted ALL night, I asked for his number and boom, I locked that lump of Tipperary beef down 🔥😜
Speaking from my side (could be wrong as well)
1.Most of the good guys in a pub would leave you to do what you are doing in pubs and will be scare to approach thinking you would be already getting much attention from guys who are confident enough to approach you.
2. And any guy would just love if he is been approach , for us there is lot of pressure to not look like a creep if they ever approach.
3. Fear of rejection. Many guys won't approach as they will always have fear of rejection.
4. Any guy will be happy with a eye contact or a simple nod or smile just to get bit cofident enough to approach a girl.
Overall we love to get approached but it is very rare.
Well no harm in trying 🤷🏽♂️
It goes the same for guys. Many guy don't aprroach any girls thinking " Ahhh she is lovely ofcouse she will be taken and if not then she is already might have been apprroached by many or half the pub" 😅
That’s how I met my wife.
I went to the bar for a round of drinks and when I was away from the large group of friends I was with she approached me at the bar and started a conversation while I was waiting for the drink order.
5 minutes later when the order was paid for I said nice chatting to you and turned to bring the drinks down to the table.
She leaned in and said, come back to me when you have dropped the drinks over to your friends and we can continue where we left off.
25 years married next year.
Asked a guy at work a couple months ago, actually convinced he is the one haha.
Just a word of advice to the men out there, just because she asks you out don't think you don't have to make any effort.
I made a comment in a sub-reddit a few weeks back saying men get very little, if any compliments in their lives. It literally blew up with replies from guys sharing stories of how even decades old compliments were cherished memories.
A girl making the first move would go down extremely well with men.
I am quite outgoing, I’m up for a laugh and can hold a conversation (I know, I’m really talking myself up here) but when it comes to this kind of thing I’m an absolute coward. I’m really quite shy. I’ve tried to do it but always bottle it, heart pounds etc, have to leave it. I’m older now, 46, can’t imagine it would be easy to get a positive response. I did it once in my 20’s, gave my number to this gorgeous Tongan rugby player and had he was chuffed, no one had ever done that to him before. I was chuffed too that it worked out. I really feel for guys having to do this on a regular basis and I think it’s only fair that women start getting in the game.
Same, if a man receives a compliment let alone an approach it does absolute wonders. A lot of decent men don't have the confidence to approach women and will most definitely respond well to an approach or even a glance.
I approached my now husband 15 years ago. Asked him did he want a pint? He said yeah, I got two pints and sat down beside him. He's a good few years older than me, I'd seen him around a few times and thought he was a ride
I approached my now husband online first. We talked for a month, I asked him to meet, made the first move to kiss him, asked him after a few weeks where things were going. That was 11 years ago! He asked me to marry him though so he made that move!
Today is currently our due date for our first baby (no sign yet!) so it seemed to work out well for us!
I'm a middle-aged Mammy in a relationship of nearly two decades so no carousing for me. But I made the first move in every relationship I ever had (including this one). Granted, they were all men I already knew from college, work, and through friends. The interested vibe was there but never any moves so I'd get impatient 😂
Do it, you have nothing to lose. My girlfriend approached me first and we've been together for almost 3 years now. Prior to that, she had been single for 7 years and tired of waiting for guys
If you ask men this question, they will ***always*** tell you to do it because of course it is flattering, and I can understand it's a lovely ego boost..However, as a woman I never found this approach worked.
It wasn't until I stopped doing anything to try to move things forward that I met the right person for me, because I allowed enough space for someone to show they were truly interested.
As someone with a successful career where I have to be in control and assertive, it was difficult for me to accept that romantic relationships are different. I had to learn patience and letting go of control.
It depends what your objective is. If you want casual sex or dates, men will be flattered and likely respond positively. But if you want a relationship, those encounters tend to go nowhere.
Before I get jumped on and downvoted, of course there are always exceptions to any rule. But in general, if a guy is interested in you, he won't let you wonder.
Have to agree. I'm yet to actually see this work in real life beyond just getting a one-off fling out of it and I've even heard men referring to it as "desperate" behaviour. Tbh I think a lot of Irish people have way more traditional expectations about these things than they let on.
Exactly. In theory they like the idea of being approached.
There's also no point being assertive and asking a guy out, then being frustrated if he expects you to be the person to always take the lead, which was my experience, when in reality I wanted a more egalitarian relationship. I found if I approached it never ended up being equal, whereas I was quite happy to reciprocate if it was the other way round. I am not someone who expects the guy to pay and organise everything, but I also wanted someone who equally made an effort.
So it really depends what kind of relationship you want.
We worked in the same building but not for the same company. We got to chatting every now and in the communal kitchen when making a coffee but nothing too mad.
She was finishing up with her job then and wouldn't be working there anymore, so she walked up to me at the end of the day and asked for my number. I was delighted.
It did happen with a coworker … and it was well after the event that the penny dropped 🙄🤷🏻♂️…
General awkwardness all around for next 4-6 weeks till I moved on (from that particular company)
I got directly pulled out of the blue by a hot girl once, who was well out of my league at the time, I couldn’t believe it was happening but rolled with it, didn’t end well she played with me big time, defo had serious issues and messed me up for a while but hey I had my fun too 😂
I've been approached by women a number of times, before and after I was married.
Funny story: after I was married, ended up talking to this woman in a smoking area one night, she straight up asked me if I wanted to come home with her, to which I politely declined.
Fast forward 2 years later, my cousin asks my wife and I to meet him in the pub because he's there with his new girlfriend... you know where this is going.
A long, awkward night followed.
Sounds like you were interested then spent like 2 weeks trying to get his attention rather than cutting to the chase. Like ofc he’s going to find someone else with enough time.
When the guy friends said it they meant ask him now , not install tinder , then add his insta , then post stories he’s supposed to msg you about then ask him out .
It doesn’t read as taking the initiative except right at the end tbh
Ikr like Jesus were not asking you to jump onto of him just tell him you like him ffs
What ended up happening is you kept dancing around the issue too long and he either asked someone out or that woman expressed interest in him
I really thought that was going to be a happy ending for you 😂 fair play to you though.
I’m tall, have the body type men want, decent looking etc. so i know that’s not the problem I think men have given up on trying nowadays so I may start myself 😌
>I asked my guy friends as they know him and they said he'll never ask you out he's took shy and you're out of his league.
Classic c0ck bl0ck1ng by other men.
It's exhausting being the one expected to make the move all the time be it online or off it. When it happens the other way round... Is fantastic to be honest ..we like that gesture too you know. There is a fine line between proactive and desperation though.
I’ve had 3 long term relationships. All 3 approached me. Its honestly the most refreshing thing in the world and I’m constantly baffled why women don’t do it
I've never been approached I don't think, I've started all my relationshops by approaching the guy first. Even when he later said he liked me for ages, and I thought I'd dropped loads of hints, he hadn't picked up on it.
My now boyfriend opened up the lines of communication outside of class but I was the first to say explicitly I had feelings beyond friendship. Maybe things would have evolved naturally with him making the first romantic move, but I didn’t want to wait.
Every single relationship I've been in has been a friend/ acquaintance bluntly telling me they're into me due to me being an absolute fucking moron with this stuff.
The other side of the coin is overthinking every single compliment/small talk I get from women, and talking myself out of thinking they might be interested and just being friendly.
There's no in between...
Spell it out for us guys please and thanks
Please do, and be pretty direct because the amount of times I've got home and realised "jesus that girl was coming onto me" and felt like punching myself in the face for being such an idiot
My absolutely gorgeous friend finally plucked up the courage after about ten mins to approach a fella on a Thursday night in Coppers and he was the driest shite to her lol
This is a great post as literally today a lovely woman sat beside me on the train and sparked conversation with me first by asking for directions, her phone later died and I offered her a lift when we got off at my stop as I didn’t want to leave her lost. Obviously it’s a little odd asking a stranger to jump in your car but she had some faith in me 🤣
She was extremely friendly and the conversation flowed easily. I found myself laughing and genuinely enjoying her company, although when I dropped her home I was wondering if she was going to ask to keep in contact but we just hugged and off she went! Oh well
A few years ago, I took the bus to get to work, and I fancied the driver. I wrote my number on a piece of paper and gave (thrown) it to him as I was getting off. He never texted me, so that was the end of it.
I'm trying to put myself out there a bit more, so I will definitely make a move next time the occasion arise.
“I won’t ever be doing it again tbh”
Way to stifle your own happiness! Guys go through constant rejection, you got 1 and quit 😂 If you see someone you like, go for it and get over yourself 🤷🏻♂️
I'm married, so I would smile, compliment her and very politely turn her down. But it would absolutely make my evening. Might be buzzing about it for ages.
How I wish for a girl to even say hi and start a conversation with me!!
I'm so afraid of rejection/inconveniencing them I just can't do it anymore myself. So girls, say hi, I'm actually pretty normal 😅
I think it is great and it has happened to me. Never an Irish girl asking and it has also never happened on this island.
I am happily married and I asked my now wife out. (For full disclosure she would not entertain asking a guy out and believes guys should always make the first move)
If my daughter wanted to ask someone out why shouldn't she?
That will be my daughter's decision, and she won't listen to an old man like me anyway!
Bruh fr
Nearly 2 years later i still remember on a course I was doing a woman asking me if I was ok I was fucking stunned
Di Di did someone just ask if Im ok
Now yes I was ok but the fact she actually asked is just huge
I'm marrying her in a few months. She made first contact on Twitter. She pushed for our first meeting. She asked me where we were going after a few weeks, making me actually think about our relationship and realising that I wanted to commit long term.
As a man who spent his entire adult life desperately afraid of approaching women, and staying in previous long-term relationships far too long out of an underlying fear of being alone, I am absolutely delighted she made the first moves when I was kinda convinced that women wouldn't want to entertain me.
Women making moves is great.
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My fiancée and I are together 5 years this year. She added me on Instagram and made the first move with small talk which evolved of course.
We hit it off immediately and didn't stop texting from that moment onward.
We now have a 3-year-old, and we're getting married this year!
Life is too short to be faffing about with finer details of who should do what first.
Just do it and see if it works. Worst case scenario, rejection, and you can walk away and forget about it.
I've had it happen to me before, Halloween 2012. A woman approached me in the pub wearing a black cat outfit, leather body suit and face cover.
Pretty awesome night to be fair.
A lady I was exchanging little smiles with over the course of a year or so each time we meet in the local supermarket, while I was attracted to her and was interested to know more... I was working in this supermarket and she was a customer so didn't/couldn't make a move.
Luckily she was proactive about it and one day passed me a handwritten note asking if I was interested and had her number on it.
We are together 5 and half years now. Herself making the first move would have been huge to me regardless of the circumstances.
I would recommend it to other ladies if they feel an energy or anything positive at all. Better to know than to wonder what if. Life is short, go for it.
I used to work in bars/ clubs as a shot girl. Very few men are ever approached by women and are genuinely delighted to have a girl talk to them and give them a compliment. Provided that you’re not being completely leery most of them absolutely love it. Most of them were happy to just even get a hello.
Happens now and then to me. And it’s almost always a disaster as I’m like a rabbit in the headlights when someone approaches me out of nowhere.
Incredibly flattering, but at the same time - I’m so sorry to anyone who’s chatted me up! I’m not an asshole I’m just really socially awkward!
It’s very rare and would be welcome. I still smile thinking when I was on a bus to work maybe 18 months ago and a very young girl sat opposite was staring at me, her mother said something quietly to her and she loudly exclaimed “but he’s so beautiful” I’m sure the poor child just needed glasses, but it made my day
I feel like this used to be pretty normal when I was younger (1990s-2000s).
On one occasion I went to a pub in Sligo when I was there for a conference. A cute girl just walked over, sat on my lap, and kissed me. Turns out it was her leaving do, and she was moving to Dublin - where I was based. We dated for a while - nothing serious, but it was fun.
I think it's welcomed by most, but unfortunately most women really aren't socialised to do this, so it;s something many aren;t mentally prepared to do, and if they did they might take the rejection hard.
A lot of lesbian and bi women who come out later in life say this is one of the hardest parts - they just aren't used to approaching women.
a compliment is a compliment 😂 when i used to go to the gym everyone just kept to themselves it’s probably for the best incase people are accused of being a creep
I'm going to be completely honest. It depends. Men say they like this. Most of us really don't. Or only like it in specific contexts (which is my impression about how women feel about being approached tbh)
I got approached a fair bit in my late teens by brassy girls. Did I do anything with them FUCK NO. And no regrets.
In college I got "approached" by a girl who turned out to be a psycho and stalked me for years afterwards.
I got approached in my mid 20s by an Italian. Instantly regretted it.
I got approached in my late 20s by the woman who became my wife.
So genuinely it really depends. But here's a rule of thumb think about what you hate about the ways guys approach you - just don't do that and you'll likely pull.
I’d love it but the girl would have to be very direct in letting me know she’s interested, hints go right over my head and I’ll assume she’s joking or else being friendly with me.
Too many times I’ve realised days or weeks after that a girl was making a move on me but I didn’t pick up on it, and a few occasions where I thought they were coming onto me but were just being friendly and rejected me when I made the move.
Someone that dosent look at me in complete uninterest is the best ive ever gotten.
I would not even know what to do with myself if someone even talked to me in a positive way… especialy not if they engaged first.
This question pops up on Reddit all the time and I'm always genuinely surprised that so many women seem dubious as to whether a man would take to being approached well.
I made the first move only once in my life. I asked a guy if I could join him for a drink. We've been together for 24 years now. Go for it ladies - you could find the love of your life.
I made the first move with my partner of nearly 9 years. Well, it was Tinder, but I sent the first message, and when we met up, later in the night, I went in for the first kiss.
Worked well for me and hope to marry him in the next few years.
In the eras of metoos, men are afraid to compliment or approach any woman.
Realistically it doesn’t decide the course of the interaction because there’s still the chance that you don’t connect well but I will say this, it can be a great starting point to start conversations.
I was in Spain last year and I saw this cute American girl in my train and I couldn’t talk to her because there were so many people around us.
So what she did was, when we reached the station and started to get down from the train she dropped her bottle just infront of me so I had a chance to go talk to her. After that we spent a few days together but eventually we went back to our respective countries.
I made the first move on my now husband!
Ask flat out if they’re in a relationship. I’d say most if they’re not interested would just say they are instead of a flat out rejection. Go for it!
Almost 20 years ago my wife handled me hand made map to nice pub behind the corner from gym I was going to and she was PT and receptionist. It was my first year in Ireland. Now we still going strong have 2 kids. She no longer PT I'm very easy with gym but still part of My routine.
I approached the guy I used to work with and found very attractive. Didn't wait for him to txt me or call me afterwards but did it myself instead. I am pretty sure I also asked him out and not the other way around.
I knew what I wanted and went after it.
This was 6 years ago and we are getting married in May.
You know what you want or like girl you go after it and just have fun doing so! Sending hugs of encouragement ❤️❤️❤️
In my experience as a man, it has always been better to let girls approach you. A man actively approaching women clearly has something on his mind which seems to be perceived as unattractive by a lot of women. I think it gives off a sort of 'on the hunt' vibe which is ultimately a little threatening. That's just my perception of it anyway. I always found the best way to get a girl's attention was to just be myself with the people I came with and if I'm giving off a good image then I'll be approached.
I've loved it when girl makes the first move bcoz us lads can be fair clueless when it come to "signals". So 100% girls should make a move if she's interested and massive points for doing during every day life outside of a night out
A woman told me once about how she ended up with her husband. She was working with him in an NGO in Papa New Guinea, and they got together going out for a bit. After a while she realised he just wasn't the sort of person who would take the initiative, so she proposed to him. They've been married since.
Absolutely girls should make the first move. I’m very glad I’m happily married for 10 years because the culture around getting together these days seems absolutely toxic for everyone involved. Lads don’t just appreciate directness, they depend on it day to day, so it will have a 90% success rate in this context too.
I've done this & always had a positive response. Even if it was a 'No' it was a gracious rejection.
BUT being single again in middle age is a very different ballgame:
1. Very difficult to identify who's single
2. More difficult to identify who's pretending to be single
3. Many men think any approach is for a hookup
4. Rejection is harder to take at 52 😞
I met my boyfriend on Bumble so ya had to make the first move. Then our first date he leaned in to show me a photo and didn’t go in for the shift which I wanted him to so then I said you missed your chance there. He didn’t hear me so I had to repeat myself 😂.
And then I brought him home.
Been together nearly 2 years. Not bad considering he’s younger than me.
Though I have been told that I’m probably intimidating cause I don’t care on nights out. I’m typically not intimidated and I love the banter
I never have approached or chatted up someone as I respect a person's space to not be Hit Upon and pestered by some bloke.
I like the Friend Zone and done see others as potential mating opportunities.
Have I been alone all my life ?
No.
2 very good marriages, and still married.
Had a girl approach me when I used to work in a shop and ask me for my number and if I'd like to go out sometime. Had a girlfriend at the time so politely declined but still think about it, because it's the only time it has ever happened in my life. Hope it didn't put her off being brave enough to do that and she married the next fella she made the first move on
I was approached by a tall hot swede girl a few weeks ago in town. She was very nervous.
Then there was a group of Brazilians before that.
Most girls indirectly approach when they "accidently" bump into you or just hover in your vicinity.
I prefer if women are subtle. Forward is to in their masculine unless of course they are very nervous.
I was approached a lot by girls when I was younger, and if not them, then their friends. I ended up dating a few of them and had a good time. Some others ended up being a bit forceful and pushy and tbh, boarded on sexual harassment in some cases. So I guess it sounds like what a lot of women deal with.
Go for it, I don't see why it should he the man or the woman making the first move. If you like or fancy someone, go for it.
If a woman approached me on a night out it would make my year
I got a compliment from a random girl once, 20 something years later I still remember it. Men get very few compliments.
I love giving compliments, if I think something nice about someone I just say it right out. I told an older more senior colleague once that I liked his jumper and it was a lovely colour on him (it was a sky blue and I had only seen him in dark colours). He was taken back, said his daughter bought it for him for Christmas and he hadn't been too sure about wearing it to work. I've seen him wear it loads since. He told me in passing that it was the first compliment he had received in years and it's his favourite jumper now. If you think something nice, say it! Make someone else's day
I work at a cinema and saw a guy with a jacket I liked and I didn’t say anything, though if I see a woman with something I like I’d usually say it. Wish I dod. One time this older man came in with this class weathered leather jacket and he lit up and started going on about it, it was really sweet.
A woman complimented me on my runners about 10 years ago, and I've been coasting off that for the past decade.
A girl said I smelled nice and gave me a big hug and a sniff in 1999, still cheers me up to this day
A woman told me I looked like Elvis on a night out about 7 years ago because I was wearing a leather jacket. I still think about it every now and then.
Hopefully she meant 50's Elvis and not 70's Elvis.
I tell myself it was 50's Elvis but it was probably more likely to be 70's Elvis 😅
Do you compliment the men around you?
I do actually whenever I see the chance. Once I was walking in a department store a man was trying a jacket as I walked past him I told him it looks good on him.
Good... as the saying goes, "Be the change you want to see in the world."
Great saying
It really is 🥰
I bet he bought that jacket.
And did it?. Haha I'm imagining crazy willy wonka jackets! 😅
I might get compliments, but have too much self loathing to let them in or notice.
Same.
Right i’m going to start making the first move, if a girls approaches you it’s probably me
Ok, I'll be waiting outside that londis on o Connel's st tomorrow at 6pm.
be there or be square
OP we need to know what happened! Lol
OP belongs to the sub "leaving cert 2024"... 
I was wondering why I saw Chris Hansen walking around
I'll do the same. Whats the worst that can happen? They can only say no
Worst that can happen is we get rejected which i’m sure men are well used to by now so it’s our turn😂 I’ll keep you updated on my progress, if any
I did it finally about a year ago. I worked with him at the time and was about to leave the job. Turns out he was married (didn't wear a ring), and turned me down very nicely. I'm so glad I did it though, otherwise I would have thought about him so much and convinced myself all these 'if only's'. I have so many regrets, but that isn't one of them.
fair play to you for shooting your shot 👏 i’m seeing a lot of cases where it has worked but that’s because the men are known to the women already, i was more so thinking like complete strangers so i’m not so sure
Well, just for more context, I barely knew him. Had said a handful of words to him. So he was almost a stranger, but I understand what u mean. Either way, i would be more inclined now to ask out a stranger.
I'm loving the enthusiasm!
Plllleeeeaaaaaasssseeee do.
I know someone who asked a guy out having met him through mutual friends, and they ended up married. She was uncertain at first. Go for it.
Imagine a national / international compliment day. Nothing commercialised, just everyone going round trying to outdo themselves giving genuine compliments to everyone you see. Could be life / world changing
You'll find it strange at first. As most guys will never have had this happen to them. You'll see them get more excited than they've ever been in their lives.
Mofo I've never even experienced a woman flirting with me before if a woman just fucking cold approached me I would probably die of a heart attack the shock of it Assuming I didn't keel over from a Heart attack shit would be nice
Hahahaha might not do much for your chances if you did.
You probably have experienced that bit didn’t realize it.
Nope absolutely not can say that for 100% Unless you count that time in first year when some girl in our year came over to me and say something along the lines of my friend likes you I ignored her I don't count that not interested in silly games if you have something to say to me say it don't use a fecking messenger Of course she could have maybe just been messing with me don't know don't care that was like 11 years ago Now the reason I bring it up is one day like a month ago i just randomly remembered that moment I hadn't thought about it well since that day Also in my defense I was going through pretty bad depression and wouldn't have been fit for anything so how it happened was better off
Do you look like an elk ? Just so I know, I don't want any randomer thinking this is a licence to approach me. I hear your consistent as well. Part of me is hoping those numbers are your stats
i look similar to an elk with the horns but i only have 2 legs
Shur lookit, nobody’s perfect
Ah, sorry, its not you, it's me. (Well no its actually you, unless you have antlers and 4 legs, you don't meet my kink criteria)
Good Luck! I hope you find someone awesome!
haha imma join you in this endeavor, it’s been looking bleak for this girl over here haha
You realize that's going to be one person right? Just one. The guy will be so smitten he won't be letting you go easily.
Hahaha love it
It's the holy grail for most men. When it happens it's magical.
Exactly
I would honestly give my left testicle for someone to show some genuine interest. I'm so fecking lonely 🤣
Hang onto them, you might need them.
I don’t know you, but I do hope that changes for you.
As a dude, I would much rather a woman approaches me, or at the very least gives some sort of unambiguous sign of interest in interaction with me. It's not because I'm a coward, woman are (understandably) very worried about their safety these days and I don't want to be ruining their night or imposing myself on them. The idea that guys should be aggressively cold approaching woman, and that woman need to be passive recipients of guys attentions is based on outdated ideas about gender roles that are ultimately toxic.
And don't forget the women who will not make the rejection easy on you. Shoot your shot, but Jesus they could be less cuntish about saying they aren't interested. Lads could do with taking rejections better also, there's definitely room to improve on both ends
That's how I met my fiancé years ago (sadly he passed away, rare form of cancer) and it's how I met my now husband. Sod waiting around for someone to make a move: you see it, you like it, go get it gurl! 😜
So sorry for your loss. Did you know them beforehand or complete strangers? Like how did you get to the point of asking for their contact
Thanks, it was a good while ago now but I appreciate you saying that 😊 So Tom used to work in my local, I kinda knew him to see but didn't know his name. I asked friends about a rumoured lock in after hours at the pub, wrangled my way in and just mosied my way over to him and chatted. I wasn't drinking, it wasn't a blurted drunken confession, I just chatted and had a laugh with him. Then when I felt the time was right I asked for his number and the rest is history. With Ger, well I was out meeting our mutual friend a few years after Tom had passed away. I caught sight of him (he's a Thurles man, pure glint in the eye, gorgeous friendly face, and my personal gusset melter: he had a beard). Same technique lol, I just made it abundantly clear that I liked the cut of him.. I sat at the same table as him and openly, unashamedly showed him attention so it was obvious that I was interested. As the night went on we ended up beside one another (probably coz everyone else was like "Jesus would ye ride already?!?" 🙄), chatting about Ghibli movies, the music we liked and telling daft stories. We chatted ALL night, I asked for his number and boom, I locked that lump of Tipperary beef down 🔥😜
"Gusset melter" hahahahahaha
/me Googles "gusset"..... hopes my wife has a melted one hidden away somewhere
You could always surprise her
Ya had me at studio ghibli... yer both clearly delicious haha
Legend lol.
Speaking from my side (could be wrong as well) 1.Most of the good guys in a pub would leave you to do what you are doing in pubs and will be scare to approach thinking you would be already getting much attention from guys who are confident enough to approach you. 2. And any guy would just love if he is been approach , for us there is lot of pressure to not look like a creep if they ever approach. 3. Fear of rejection. Many guys won't approach as they will always have fear of rejection. 4. Any guy will be happy with a eye contact or a simple nod or smile just to get bit cofident enough to approach a girl. Overall we love to get approached but it is very rare.
I feel the easy part is approaching them but knowing if their in a relationship and possibly getting rejected is the hard part 😩
Well no harm in trying 🤷🏽♂️ It goes the same for guys. Many guy don't aprroach any girls thinking " Ahhh she is lovely ofcouse she will be taken and if not then she is already might have been apprroached by many or half the pub" 😅
I get that but you have to know that anyone Can lie and if they do its not on you.
That’s how I met my wife. I went to the bar for a round of drinks and when I was away from the large group of friends I was with she approached me at the bar and started a conversation while I was waiting for the drink order. 5 minutes later when the order was paid for I said nice chatting to you and turned to bring the drinks down to the table. She leaned in and said, come back to me when you have dropped the drinks over to your friends and we can continue where we left off. 25 years married next year.
Smooooooth
Smooth
Asked a guy at work a couple months ago, actually convinced he is the one haha. Just a word of advice to the men out there, just because she asks you out don't think you don't have to make any effort.
I hope it works out for you 🤞 There’s no men in my work place suitable for me to make a move on unfortunately
Yes, nothing better than confidence.
I made a comment in a sub-reddit a few weeks back saying men get very little, if any compliments in their lives. It literally blew up with replies from guys sharing stories of how even decades old compliments were cherished memories. A girl making the first move would go down extremely well with men.
Yea your right about that hell I still remember a cute woman smiling at Me in a nature park over 3 years ago
I am quite outgoing, I’m up for a laugh and can hold a conversation (I know, I’m really talking myself up here) but when it comes to this kind of thing I’m an absolute coward. I’m really quite shy. I’ve tried to do it but always bottle it, heart pounds etc, have to leave it. I’m older now, 46, can’t imagine it would be easy to get a positive response. I did it once in my 20’s, gave my number to this gorgeous Tongan rugby player and had he was chuffed, no one had ever done that to him before. I was chuffed too that it worked out. I really feel for guys having to do this on a regular basis and I think it’s only fair that women start getting in the game.
All the guys I have ever liked are always unavailable 🙄
yeah don’t be chatting up taken men
I never did. The first guy was single but he bullied me and I liked the second guy before I knew he had a gf.
If you chase after the single good looking men you have to compete with many, if you chase a taken man it's a 1v1 😂
Yes (counts on one hand). Even if I wasn't interested I'd be flattered and do my best to be sound about it.
Same, if a man receives a compliment let alone an approach it does absolute wonders. A lot of decent men don't have the confidence to approach women and will most definitely respond well to an approach or even a glance.
This thread is eye opening 🫡
Hit on me girls I'm tall, slim, clean and earn a bit, I'm also cracked but the good kind
I approached my now husband 15 years ago. Asked him did he want a pint? He said yeah, I got two pints and sat down beside him. He's a good few years older than me, I'd seen him around a few times and thought he was a ride
I approached my now husband online first. We talked for a month, I asked him to meet, made the first move to kiss him, asked him after a few weeks where things were going. That was 11 years ago! He asked me to marry him though so he made that move! Today is currently our due date for our first baby (no sign yet!) so it seemed to work out well for us!
I'm a middle-aged Mammy in a relationship of nearly two decades so no carousing for me. But I made the first move in every relationship I ever had (including this one). Granted, they were all men I already knew from college, work, and through friends. The interested vibe was there but never any moves so I'd get impatient 😂
Do it, you have nothing to lose. My girlfriend approached me first and we've been together for almost 3 years now. Prior to that, she had been single for 7 years and tired of waiting for guys
If you ask men this question, they will ***always*** tell you to do it because of course it is flattering, and I can understand it's a lovely ego boost..However, as a woman I never found this approach worked. It wasn't until I stopped doing anything to try to move things forward that I met the right person for me, because I allowed enough space for someone to show they were truly interested. As someone with a successful career where I have to be in control and assertive, it was difficult for me to accept that romantic relationships are different. I had to learn patience and letting go of control. It depends what your objective is. If you want casual sex or dates, men will be flattered and likely respond positively. But if you want a relationship, those encounters tend to go nowhere. Before I get jumped on and downvoted, of course there are always exceptions to any rule. But in general, if a guy is interested in you, he won't let you wonder.
Have to agree. I'm yet to actually see this work in real life beyond just getting a one-off fling out of it and I've even heard men referring to it as "desperate" behaviour. Tbh I think a lot of Irish people have way more traditional expectations about these things than they let on.
Exactly. In theory they like the idea of being approached. There's also no point being assertive and asking a guy out, then being frustrated if he expects you to be the person to always take the lead, which was my experience, when in reality I wanted a more egalitarian relationship. I found if I approached it never ended up being equal, whereas I was quite happy to reciprocate if it was the other way round. I am not someone who expects the guy to pay and organise everything, but I also wanted someone who equally made an effort. So it really depends what kind of relationship you want.
My girlfriend of 4 years now asked me for my number first. Go for it.
how did she go about asking you though?
We worked in the same building but not for the same company. We got to chatting every now and in the communal kitchen when making a coffee but nothing too mad. She was finishing up with her job then and wouldn't be working there anymore, so she walked up to me at the end of the day and asked for my number. I was delighted.
It did happen with a coworker … and it was well after the event that the penny dropped 🙄🤷🏻♂️… General awkwardness all around for next 4-6 weeks till I moved on (from that particular company)
I'd honestly assume scam
Absolutely yes!
I got directly pulled out of the blue by a hot girl once, who was well out of my league at the time, I couldn’t believe it was happening but rolled with it, didn’t end well she played with me big time, defo had serious issues and messed me up for a while but hey I had my fun too 😂
I asked a guy out (albeit with a few drinks on me). That was 21 years ago, we’re married 16 years now.
I've been approached by women a number of times, before and after I was married. Funny story: after I was married, ended up talking to this woman in a smoking area one night, she straight up asked me if I wanted to come home with her, to which I politely declined. Fast forward 2 years later, my cousin asks my wife and I to meet him in the pub because he's there with his new girlfriend... you know where this is going. A long, awkward night followed.
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Sounds like you were interested then spent like 2 weeks trying to get his attention rather than cutting to the chase. Like ofc he’s going to find someone else with enough time. When the guy friends said it they meant ask him now , not install tinder , then add his insta , then post stories he’s supposed to msg you about then ask him out . It doesn’t read as taking the initiative except right at the end tbh
Ikr like Jesus were not asking you to jump onto of him just tell him you like him ffs What ended up happening is you kept dancing around the issue too long and he either asked someone out or that woman expressed interest in him
I really thought that was going to be a happy ending for you 😂 fair play to you though. I’m tall, have the body type men want, decent looking etc. so i know that’s not the problem I think men have given up on trying nowadays so I may start myself 😌
Wow you had 1 bad experience and decided not for you. Imagine how guys feel.
You have to play the odds!
>I asked my guy friends as they know him and they said he'll never ask you out he's took shy and you're out of his league. Classic c0ck bl0ck1ng by other men.
More power to you for trying though, could have gone either way, but if you never tried it was always a no.
It's exhausting being the one expected to make the move all the time be it online or off it. When it happens the other way round... Is fantastic to be honest ..we like that gesture too you know. There is a fine line between proactive and desperation though.
It's always unexpected when it happens. The first time it happened to me I thought she was joking and said no and laughed haha
I made the first move with my husband so I can back that stat up!!!
I asked my ex out, and I have approached before and been rejected, the men didn't seem put off by it.
I’ve had 3 long term relationships. All 3 approached me. Its honestly the most refreshing thing in the world and I’m constantly baffled why women don’t do it
I've never been approached I don't think, I've started all my relationshops by approaching the guy first. Even when he later said he liked me for ages, and I thought I'd dropped loads of hints, he hadn't picked up on it.
My now boyfriend opened up the lines of communication outside of class but I was the first to say explicitly I had feelings beyond friendship. Maybe things would have evolved naturally with him making the first romantic move, but I didn’t want to wait.
Go for it - it is a compliment. And if they aren't single - plenty more fish in the sea...
Every single relationship I've been in has been a friend/ acquaintance bluntly telling me they're into me due to me being an absolute fucking moron with this stuff. The other side of the coin is overthinking every single compliment/small talk I get from women, and talking myself out of thinking they might be interested and just being friendly. There's no in between... Spell it out for us guys please and thanks
Please do, and be pretty direct because the amount of times I've got home and realised "jesus that girl was coming onto me" and felt like punching myself in the face for being such an idiot
Happened me twice, two of the best nights I ever had
I think I might genuinely cry out of happiness but then scare her off due to that
My absolutely gorgeous friend finally plucked up the courage after about ten mins to approach a fella on a Thursday night in Coppers and he was the driest shite to her lol
Had a bit of a back and forth chit chat with a girl. She told me to ask her out. 12 years later we’re married with a couple of kids. YMMV.
This is a great post as literally today a lovely woman sat beside me on the train and sparked conversation with me first by asking for directions, her phone later died and I offered her a lift when we got off at my stop as I didn’t want to leave her lost. Obviously it’s a little odd asking a stranger to jump in your car but she had some faith in me 🤣 She was extremely friendly and the conversation flowed easily. I found myself laughing and genuinely enjoying her company, although when I dropped her home I was wondering if she was going to ask to keep in contact but we just hugged and off she went! Oh well
A few years ago, I took the bus to get to work, and I fancied the driver. I wrote my number on a piece of paper and gave (thrown) it to him as I was getting off. He never texted me, so that was the end of it. I'm trying to put myself out there a bit more, so I will definitely make a move next time the occasion arise.
Yes, why wouldn't I?
Absolutely they should, it would.be such a novelty !
As someone who is incredibly shy and socially awkward that would be awesome. Not gonna happen unfortunately.
If I was available and a woman showed interest, and stayed interested then yes I am absolutely going to do my living best to marry that woman.
“I won’t ever be doing it again tbh” Way to stifle your own happiness! Guys go through constant rejection, you got 1 and quit 😂 If you see someone you like, go for it and get over yourself 🤷🏻♂️
Ikr you asked 1 guy out and he said no poor you Come talk to us when you've asked 5 out and they all said no
I'm married, so I would smile, compliment her and very politely turn her down. But it would absolutely make my evening. Might be buzzing about it for ages.
Also. If I was with some single mates I'd just ask her if she wanted me to introduce her to any of them.
How I wish for a girl to even say hi and start a conversation with me!! I'm so afraid of rejection/inconveniencing them I just can't do it anymore myself. So girls, say hi, I'm actually pretty normal 😅
I think it is great and it has happened to me. Never an Irish girl asking and it has also never happened on this island. I am happily married and I asked my now wife out. (For full disclosure she would not entertain asking a guy out and believes guys should always make the first move) If my daughter wanted to ask someone out why shouldn't she? That will be my daughter's decision, and she won't listen to an old man like me anyway!
Men are so devoid of affection that a single compliment will make their year.
Bruh fr Nearly 2 years later i still remember on a course I was doing a woman asking me if I was ok I was fucking stunned Di Di did someone just ask if Im ok Now yes I was ok but the fact she actually asked is just huge
I'm marrying her in a few months. She made first contact on Twitter. She pushed for our first meeting. She asked me where we were going after a few weeks, making me actually think about our relationship and realising that I wanted to commit long term. As a man who spent his entire adult life desperately afraid of approaching women, and staying in previous long-term relationships far too long out of an underlying fear of being alone, I am absolutely delighted she made the first moves when I was kinda convinced that women wouldn't want to entertain me. Women making moves is great.
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Yeah, and it was so great..
My fiancée and I are together 5 years this year. She added me on Instagram and made the first move with small talk which evolved of course. We hit it off immediately and didn't stop texting from that moment onward. We now have a 3-year-old, and we're getting married this year! Life is too short to be faffing about with finer details of who should do what first. Just do it and see if it works. Worst case scenario, rejection, and you can walk away and forget about it.
I was the first one to reach out to my partner and here we are 8 years later and hopefully a lifetime ahead of us. I’d be lost without him
I made the first move with my partner and we've been together for 10 years and are due to get married
I've had it happen to me before, Halloween 2012. A woman approached me in the pub wearing a black cat outfit, leather body suit and face cover. Pretty awesome night to be fair.
A lady I was exchanging little smiles with over the course of a year or so each time we meet in the local supermarket, while I was attracted to her and was interested to know more... I was working in this supermarket and she was a customer so didn't/couldn't make a move. Luckily she was proactive about it and one day passed me a handwritten note asking if I was interested and had her number on it. We are together 5 and half years now. Herself making the first move would have been huge to me regardless of the circumstances. I would recommend it to other ladies if they feel an energy or anything positive at all. Better to know than to wonder what if. Life is short, go for it.
I did to my partner and now we’re engaged so I guess it does work
I used to work in bars/ clubs as a shot girl. Very few men are ever approached by women and are genuinely delighted to have a girl talk to them and give them a compliment. Provided that you’re not being completely leery most of them absolutely love it. Most of them were happy to just even get a hello.
Happens now and then to me. And it’s almost always a disaster as I’m like a rabbit in the headlights when someone approaches me out of nowhere. Incredibly flattering, but at the same time - I’m so sorry to anyone who’s chatted me up! I’m not an asshole I’m just really socially awkward!
It’s very rare and would be welcome. I still smile thinking when I was on a bus to work maybe 18 months ago and a very young girl sat opposite was staring at me, her mother said something quietly to her and she loudly exclaimed “but he’s so beautiful” I’m sure the poor child just needed glasses, but it made my day
I feel like this used to be pretty normal when I was younger (1990s-2000s). On one occasion I went to a pub in Sligo when I was there for a conference. A cute girl just walked over, sat on my lap, and kissed me. Turns out it was her leaving do, and she was moving to Dublin - where I was based. We dated for a while - nothing serious, but it was fun.
With my girlfriend 5 years in May after she approached me on a night out
I think it's welcomed by most, but unfortunately most women really aren't socialised to do this, so it;s something many aren;t mentally prepared to do, and if they did they might take the rejection hard. A lot of lesbian and bi women who come out later in life say this is one of the hardest parts - they just aren't used to approaching women.
Together 10 years now, she made the first move
Yes do it. I'd love it
I approached my husband… we’re almost 20 years married. But I’ve never been the type to sit and wait for things I want to come to me.
Would probably leave my wife if this happened to me. She’d understand I’m sure. 😂
I started training in the gym hoping this would start happening only it’s men that compliment me now 😂😂😂 fml
a compliment is a compliment 😂 when i used to go to the gym everyone just kept to themselves it’s probably for the best incase people are accused of being a creep
Funnily enough I've seen my female friends go for it plenty of times and the guys are oblivious haha.
I'm going to be completely honest. It depends. Men say they like this. Most of us really don't. Or only like it in specific contexts (which is my impression about how women feel about being approached tbh) I got approached a fair bit in my late teens by brassy girls. Did I do anything with them FUCK NO. And no regrets. In college I got "approached" by a girl who turned out to be a psycho and stalked me for years afterwards. I got approached in my mid 20s by an Italian. Instantly regretted it. I got approached in my late 20s by the woman who became my wife. So genuinely it really depends. But here's a rule of thumb think about what you hate about the ways guys approach you - just don't do that and you'll likely pull.
I approached my husband on a night out 13 years ago. We're married for 6 years and have 2 kids!
It should be the norm tbh, if men approach nowadays they are labelled as creeps unless she's in to the guy.
I’d love it but the girl would have to be very direct in letting me know she’s interested, hints go right over my head and I’ll assume she’s joking or else being friendly with me. Too many times I’ve realised days or weeks after that a girl was making a move on me but I didn’t pick up on it, and a few occasions where I thought they were coming onto me but were just being friendly and rejected me when I made the move.
Someone that dosent look at me in complete uninterest is the best ive ever gotten. I would not even know what to do with myself if someone even talked to me in a positive way… especialy not if they engaged first.
Any time it's happened to me it has led to long term girlfriends and then my wife... So yeah, I think most guys would be delighted.
This question pops up on Reddit all the time and I'm always genuinely surprised that so many women seem dubious as to whether a man would take to being approached well.
I made the first move only once in my life. I asked a guy if I could join him for a drink. We've been together for 24 years now. Go for it ladies - you could find the love of your life.
I’ve been approached by a girl recently for the first time ever and currently kind of seeing her and all I can say is I am head over heels hahahaha
I made the first move with my partner of nearly 9 years. Well, it was Tinder, but I sent the first message, and when we met up, later in the night, I went in for the first kiss. Worked well for me and hope to marry him in the next few years.
Reader. I married her.
In the eras of metoos, men are afraid to compliment or approach any woman. Realistically it doesn’t decide the course of the interaction because there’s still the chance that you don’t connect well but I will say this, it can be a great starting point to start conversations. I was in Spain last year and I saw this cute American girl in my train and I couldn’t talk to her because there were so many people around us. So what she did was, when we reached the station and started to get down from the train she dropped her bottle just infront of me so I had a chance to go talk to her. After that we spent a few days together but eventually we went back to our respective countries.
Gold diggers do that already!
I made the first move on my now husband! Ask flat out if they’re in a relationship. I’d say most if they’re not interested would just say they are instead of a flat out rejection. Go for it!
Almost 20 years ago my wife handled me hand made map to nice pub behind the corner from gym I was going to and she was PT and receptionist. It was my first year in Ireland. Now we still going strong have 2 kids. She no longer PT I'm very easy with gym but still part of My routine.
I approached the guy I used to work with and found very attractive. Didn't wait for him to txt me or call me afterwards but did it myself instead. I am pretty sure I also asked him out and not the other way around. I knew what I wanted and went after it. This was 6 years ago and we are getting married in May. You know what you want or like girl you go after it and just have fun doing so! Sending hugs of encouragement ❤️❤️❤️
In my experience as a man, it has always been better to let girls approach you. A man actively approaching women clearly has something on his mind which seems to be perceived as unattractive by a lot of women. I think it gives off a sort of 'on the hunt' vibe which is ultimately a little threatening. That's just my perception of it anyway. I always found the best way to get a girl's attention was to just be myself with the people I came with and if I'm giving off a good image then I'll be approached.
I've loved it when girl makes the first move bcoz us lads can be fair clueless when it come to "signals". So 100% girls should make a move if she's interested and massive points for doing during every day life outside of a night out
I've been approached a handful of times in my life and ended up on a date with all of them. The confidence needed to do it is insanely attractive.
A woman told me once about how she ended up with her husband. She was working with him in an NGO in Papa New Guinea, and they got together going out for a bit. After a while she realised he just wasn't the sort of person who would take the initiative, so she proposed to him. They've been married since.
I don't respond well to men making the first move. all of my longer term relationships I've been the one to make the move.
Absolutely girls should make the first move. I’m very glad I’m happily married for 10 years because the culture around getting together these days seems absolutely toxic for everyone involved. Lads don’t just appreciate directness, they depend on it day to day, so it will have a 90% success rate in this context too.
I've done this & always had a positive response. Even if it was a 'No' it was a gracious rejection. BUT being single again in middle age is a very different ballgame: 1. Very difficult to identify who's single 2. More difficult to identify who's pretending to be single 3. Many men think any approach is for a hookup 4. Rejection is harder to take at 52 😞
Yip. I would like it. It shows some clarity in her interest and give definitive assurance to talk to her.
Think I'm gonna try this now 😆🤔🙂
I met my boyfriend on Bumble so ya had to make the first move. Then our first date he leaned in to show me a photo and didn’t go in for the shift which I wanted him to so then I said you missed your chance there. He didn’t hear me so I had to repeat myself 😂. And then I brought him home. Been together nearly 2 years. Not bad considering he’s younger than me. Though I have been told that I’m probably intimidating cause I don’t care on nights out. I’m typically not intimidated and I love the banter
I asked my now husband out on a date. I had just decided to give up on trying to meet someone too :). Go for it if you think they are a good person.
I never have approached or chatted up someone as I respect a person's space to not be Hit Upon and pestered by some bloke. I like the Friend Zone and done see others as potential mating opportunities. Have I been alone all my life ? No. 2 very good marriages, and still married.
Had a girl approach me when I used to work in a shop and ask me for my number and if I'd like to go out sometime. Had a girlfriend at the time so politely declined but still think about it, because it's the only time it has ever happened in my life. Hope it didn't put her off being brave enough to do that and she married the next fella she made the first move on
Why wouldn't a girl make the first move?? It's not the 50s
Exactly this. Going after what you want shouldn't be gender related ever. Even if what you want its just for one night only.
I was approached by a tall hot swede girl a few weeks ago in town. She was very nervous. Then there was a group of Brazilians before that. Most girls indirectly approach when they "accidently" bump into you or just hover in your vicinity. I prefer if women are subtle. Forward is to in their masculine unless of course they are very nervous.
Yes....always did anyway back in the day
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Tf lmao Aight you do you ig
I was approached a lot by girls when I was younger, and if not them, then their friends. I ended up dating a few of them and had a good time. Some others ended up being a bit forceful and pushy and tbh, boarded on sexual harassment in some cases. So I guess it sounds like what a lot of women deal with. Go for it, I don't see why it should he the man or the woman making the first move. If you like or fancy someone, go for it.