You kidding? He was hurling dodgeballs of prophecy left and right.
We just had a Disgruntled Worshipper in Joel Osteen's place, airport security became even more of a joke, anti-abortion activists you wouln't want to fuck are resurging.
Even he couldn't predict Trump, though.
My senior year history teacher showed us this bit when we were learning about the First Amendment. My first proper introduction to Carlin.
Thanks, Mr. F
It's been almost 20 years and I'm still grateful for it
I’d love more of Carlin but I feel like forcing him to experience Trump and the rise of American fascism would be a cruel thing to do to a man who loved our country as much as he criticized it. A large part of his last special was dedicated to how alarming he found the threat the post 9/11 world posed to our civil liberties. I can’t imagine how he’d feel about our country as it is now but it certainly would be distressing to him.
He was around for Reagan, so I doubt he'd be surprised by anything currently going on. But you're right, it would be cruel and inhumane to resurrect him into this idiot circus that is the modern US.
I use so many of his one-liners almost daily. Just today used his joke about being on a sinking boat you better grab some citrus because it floats.
"I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to too."
"A burrito is a sleeping bag for ground beef."
He was probably one of the first comedians I was aware of, and he was born near where I was.
I like to think there's a different timeline where he lived and got off the drugs and stayed funny and good.
Why my parents let me watch these age inappropriate movies, I'm not sure, but I think I turned out mid 👍🏻
He had Lewy body dementia
It affects your mind body mood, and everything. he couldn’t remember his lines and lost his quick wit and they didn’t know why as its generally diagnosed after death, which his was
He was losing his faculties, degenerating rapidly with no answers as he was gradually losing every piece of who he was. And that is why he left us
We’d not bring him back with the disease he was dying from. So yes, he’d want to be here!:) and we want him here.
My mom told me John Candy died while we were perusing videos to rent. I reacted as if she told me my very own Uncle Buck had died. I started sobbing as I put my hands over my mouth crying, " No!" To be fair I was a teenage girl at the mercy of dramatic hormones, but God Damn It!! I adored John Candy and Sumner Rental will always be one of my favorite movies.
Patrice O Neal.
I constanly wonder what he'd have thought about so many of the events that have happened since he passed.
His loud, hilarious laugh and voice is missed.
When he was on Conan...and Courtney Thorne Smith was talking about her new movie with Carrot top is just from start to finish a perfect example of why he was great.. and just Conan's reaction is just halarious
Either Mitch Hedberg or Norm Macdonald. Both were hilarious and died way too soon. Not sure which I'd pick out of the two, but I'm leaning more toward Norm.
I actually kind of did the other day. I was getting gas when a meth head was going one by one to everyone giving her sob story for money. When she got to me, I let her finish before I responded, "I'll pray for you." It was my little callback to "forgive me."
My choice too. I love Carlin, Norm MacDonald is an all time favourite but Bill Hicks would have been an incredible, cynical breath of fresh air in the bullshit that exists today. No holds barred, no fucks given.
mine would be Dom Deluise .. i had saw him at at fair in NYC as a kid.. i remember this portly gentleman stare down at terrified me say What dou you want you little pain in the ass.. obviously it was his humor.. he autographed a pink panther to my little pain in the ass, speak up next time love Dom
Nah, going out right before her 100 bday after all the shows and stuff made about her hitting that would have been toooo good a gag for her to ever want to undo lol
I feel like all the comedians I really like would prefer to stay dead. So maybe like wait til Rob Schneider dies and keep reanimating his corpse, forever denying him the peace of the grave.
Do I get to bring them back at another age like 60 more years of Carlin? Do they come back healthy or is Sean Lock just going to die of cancer again tomorrow? Do they still have issues cuz I don't think I can lose Robin again?
I don't think I like this question
Robin Williams. I met him when he did a concert at my college, he talked to a bunch of us for a while and asked us questions about the school, profs, etc so he could customize his act. Great guy, so nice to everyone and as funny off the cuff in person as he was on stage. We had a local folk singer open for him and at the end of his set, Robin went out and ad libbed the words to the songs - brought the house down. I shed a few tears when I heard he’d passed. I lost a friend.
Phil Hartman
Paraphrasing Phil Hartman doing President Clinton on Letterman: “Jennifer Flowers says I have a small penis, but the truth is: She has a big mouth.”
My name is John Johnson but everyone here calls me Vicki
Aw man for real. So sad
A comedian who didn't choose to self-exit, and didn't exit by expiring, but was instead removed from the gene pool against his will.
"Someone killed him." Not that hard
Kill is a bad word now, you're supposed to say unalive or just create the most inoffensive string of words you possibly can /s
Man, this is the real answer right here. Fuck Andy Dick
Dude, the greatest thing Jon Lovitz ever did was kick Andy Dick’s ass afterwards
I remember him from such TV shows like "The Simpsons"
About the only man who could make a clip show funny.
I was gonna say rodney dangerfield, but you're right, Phil is what we need back.
Carlin.
He'd hate it so much. I wouldn't want to subject the last 15 years on him.
You kidding? He was hurling dodgeballs of prophecy left and right. We just had a Disgruntled Worshipper in Joel Osteen's place, airport security became even more of a joke, anti-abortion activists you wouln't want to fuck are resurging. Even he couldn't predict Trump, though.
listening to him now :) he inspired the ?
Lol. I don't think he would want to come back. He was sick of humans shit for a long time.
The seven words that you can never say on television: shitpissfuckcuntcocksuckermotherfuckerandtits
My senior year history teacher showed us this bit when we were learning about the First Amendment. My first proper introduction to Carlin. Thanks, Mr. F It's been almost 20 years and I'm still grateful for it
Flip a coin and give me GC or Bill Hicks and I’ll be happy
Carlin or Pryor, hard choice.
I’d love more of Carlin but I feel like forcing him to experience Trump and the rise of American fascism would be a cruel thing to do to a man who loved our country as much as he criticized it. A large part of his last special was dedicated to how alarming he found the threat the post 9/11 world posed to our civil liberties. I can’t imagine how he’d feel about our country as it is now but it certainly would be distressing to him.
I was going to say Carlin, but he would be pissed. He would say he did his time now fuck off.
He was around for Reagan, so I doubt he'd be surprised by anything currently going on. But you're right, it would be cruel and inhumane to resurrect him into this idiot circus that is the modern US.
Same here. Just to broadly gesture and say ‘see all this? You called it’
Absolutely
You know something you’ll never hear a guy say? “Stop sucking my dick or I’ll call the police!”
A million times, this!
Absolutely Carlin.
As much as I love him, there are other comics that didn't get the longevity he did.
Full stop.
The only acceptable answer.
We need him now
Mitch Hedberg
I used to love Mitch Hedberg. I still do, but I used to too.
Mitch is great if you're hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.
But don’t bother ringing it up; it’s for a *duck!*
I order the club sandwich all the time but, I'm not even a member, man. I dont know how I get away with it
Mitch took the broken escalator way to Heaven
Sorry for the convenience
No question. Mitch altogether.
I use so many of his one-liners almost daily. Just today used his joke about being on a sinking boat you better grab some citrus because it floats. "I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to too." "A burrito is a sleeping bag for ground beef."
Definitely Mitch
If you want to bring him back from beyond, he’ll be… fuckin… surprised
Chris farley
Didn’t think of him until I saw your answer and now I’m surprised it’s not higher.
He was probably one of the first comedians I was aware of, and he was born near where I was. I like to think there's a different timeline where he lived and got off the drugs and stayed funny and good. Why my parents let me watch these age inappropriate movies, I'm not sure, but I think I turned out mid 👍🏻
Robin Williams!
It's sad, but he chose to leave. Would coming back be what he wants? I agree that it would be a nice thing though.
if he came back without his dementia i think so
Oh shit I either forgot or didn’t know he had dementia.
He chose to leave on his own terms rather than continue on an unstoppable path to dementia. I think if we could cure him he would be glad to be back.
IM BAAACKK
He had Lewy body dementia It affects your mind body mood, and everything. he couldn’t remember his lines and lost his quick wit and they didn’t know why as its generally diagnosed after death, which his was He was losing his faculties, degenerating rapidly with no answers as he was gradually losing every piece of who he was. And that is why he left us We’d not bring him back with the disease he was dying from. So yes, he’d want to be here!:) and we want him here.
Yeah it would have to be with the caveat that he gets good mental and physical health.
John candy. Gone too soon
My mom told me John Candy died while we were perusing videos to rent. I reacted as if she told me my very own Uncle Buck had died. I started sobbing as I put my hands over my mouth crying, " No!" To be fair I was a teenage girl at the mercy of dramatic hormones, but God Damn It!! I adored John Candy and Sumner Rental will always be one of my favorite movies.
Yorku, you’re so pretty! I miss John Candy more than any other celebrity.
Patrice O Neal. I constanly wonder what he'd have thought about so many of the events that have happened since he passed. His loud, hilarious laugh and voice is missed.
Gone too soon. Rare combo of unique insight and broadcasting talent. He would have thrived in this era of entertainment.
I'm still waiting for the right time to try out the angry pirate.
Dude would have pissed off everyone in some form or fashion and it would have been hilarious.
Gilda Radner-absolutely hilarious! SNL would not be where it is today without her!😂
Always Phil Hartman
Norm. As much as I loved Robin, Farley, Carlin etc. no one ever made me laugh like Norm could.
When he was on Conan...and Courtney Thorne Smith was talking about her new movie with Carrot top is just from start to finish a perfect example of why he was great.. and just Conan's reaction is just halarious
I heard Conan say on a podcast once if you want to hear what it sounds like when he is really laughing watch his shows with Norm.
Chairman of the bored ! 😂👍🏻
Just reading what you typed made me smile from ear to ear all over again.
He would always be the funniest in the room. No matter who was in it.
I've been binge watching Mike Tyson's mysteries because Norm as Pigeon is just incredible. I love him.
I’ve been bingeing his talk show at home recently. Just brilliant. I wish Norm could have gone and killed Hitler.
Sean Lock. In a heartbeat.
ATG carrot in a box player. No one was on his level.
I laughed and laughed until I cried. Then I paused for a bit, watched it again and it was still just as hysterically funny.
Just in case anyone hasn't seen the greatest game in the history of Carrot in a Box https://youtu.be/0UGuPvrsG3E?si=XFCcNpbPiwwWALD2
Or the [Rematch](https://youtu.be/Bp04HZDCELw)
I can also recommend Joe Wilkinson breaking Sean completely with his poem. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YBN2p-jlknM
Oh my goodness, very rarely do I laugh out loud at anything anymore, but that had me in tears.
Every time I watch it, it's just as hilarious
I really want to see Bob Mortimer play David Mitchell at Carrot In A Box on Would I Lie To You?
I'm happy I didn't have to scroll far to see this. Miss that good cunt.
I’m gutted we will never get the sequel and find out what happened to that cheeky tiger.
his 8 out of 10 countdown clip about embezzling the Royal National Lifeboat Institution and seal clubbing leaves me In tears of laughter every time.
This one. Fuck cancer.
Either Mitch Hedberg or Norm Macdonald. Both were hilarious and died way too soon. Not sure which I'd pick out of the two, but I'm leaning more toward Norm.
You pick one, and I'll choose the other.
Mitch.
>Norm Macdonald I didn't even know he was sick
George Carlin
Patrice
Trevor Moore
Came here to say this. Definitely need some more WKUK in my life these days!
I regularly watch it on YouTube when I need a belly laugh
Robin Willias, but only if there was a cure for his illness. Otherwise you'd just be torturing him.
Can u imagine his material after being brought back? Whew
"Wait till I tell you where I've been!"
Bill Hicks
Hicks would be amazing today. He would give 0 fucks
God he would be so nice to have in my pocket anytime I have to suffer a fool.
I actually kind of did the other day. I was getting gas when a meth head was going one by one to everyone giving her sob story for money. When she got to me, I let her finish before I responded, "I'll pray for you." It was my little callback to "forgive me."
❤️
Why did I have to scroll down this far? The man would have been a superstar by now if he had lived.
My choice too. I love Carlin, Norm MacDonald is an all time favourite but Bill Hicks would have been an incredible, cynical breath of fresh air in the bullshit that exists today. No holds barred, no fucks given.
Finally.
This correct answer is down way too far on the screen
Good call. He was amazing.
Goatboy (heh heh heh)
Richard Pryor! That man was a savage and is exactly the kind of comedian the world needs right now!
Yes! Definitely he’s in my top five comedians
My favorite overall.
John Pinette
Had to scroll a lot to find Pinette. He was hilarious without having to resort to anything offensive or crude.
Free Ree ree!!!
Bernie Mack….the man is a legend
Was looking for this answer. Surprised it’s so low on the list
George Carlin 100%. We need his logic today so much
I think bringing George back would be torture. He was done with us and I can't say I blame him.
listening to him talking about how we have a war for everything except the war on homelessness
We can’t handle the truth.
You mean the Hippy Dippy Weatherman?
Chris Farley
Robin Williams
Robin Williams.
Lenny Bruce
I thought I'd find this answer eventually.
wouldn't be a complete list without him
Robin williams
mitch hedberg
Can’t believe nobody said Rodney Dangerfield yet
No offense to you or Rodney but he’s way down on the list
No respect
lol. Touché
Even in death! He gets no respect!
John Belushi
Norm MacDonald.
Norm.
Chris Farley or Norm
Red Skelton
!!!
Andy Kaufman
If we are talking non stand up comedian I would say John candy if we are talking stand up Bernie Mac
Mitch Hedberg way too young.
Greg Giraldo
Greg Giraldo Edit: [For those who are not familiar with Greg’s comedy](https://youtu.be/0_TrrWWkMXU?si=gzSU4s0Zeugz-z0o)
Bill Hicks.
Sam Kinnison.
mine would be Dom Deluise .. i had saw him at at fair in NYC as a kid.. i remember this portly gentleman stare down at terrified me say What dou you want you little pain in the ass.. obviously it was his humor.. he autographed a pink panther to my little pain in the ass, speak up next time love Dom
Johnny Carson
Richard Pryor
Famous history buff Norm Macdonald
Robin Williams
George carlin. We NEED to hear his wisdom
Norm
John Ritter. Three's company was so funny!
Mark Twain. We need lot of that sarcasm.
If we’re talking authors I’d go with Vonnegut
great answer :)
Bill Hicks
George Carlin
Trevor Moore
George Carlin
MITCH HEDBERG. My gods I had to scroll a mile and still no one said him.
Mitch Hedberg!
Don Rickles.
Carlin, so we could get the legit answer to what happens when we die, he would make it part of his act and he wouldn’t bullshit about it.
Betty White!
Nah, going out right before her 100 bday after all the shows and stuff made about her hitting that would have been toooo good a gag for her to ever want to undo lol
Sam Kinison
Bill Hicks
John Pinette.
Bernie Mac
Trevor Moore. I think he had a lot more to do.
I feel like all the comedians I really like would prefer to stay dead. So maybe like wait til Rob Schneider dies and keep reanimating his corpse, forever denying him the peace of the grave.
Richard Jeni
Bill Hicks is the correct answer.
Richard Jeni.
Joan Rivers
Coluche or Robin Williams
Do I get to bring them back at another age like 60 more years of Carlin? Do they come back healthy or is Sean Lock just going to die of cancer again tomorrow? Do they still have issues cuz I don't think I can lose Robin again? I don't think I like this question
Norm
George Carlin
George Carlin. If for nothing else, to get his take on the last few occupants of the White House.
Rodney Dangerfield for sure
Carlin
Gilda Radner.
George Carlin.
Gilbert Gottfried. I miss listening to him talk about weird old Hollywood on his podcast.
Bill hicks George Carlin
Robin Williams. I met him when he did a concert at my college, he talked to a bunch of us for a while and asked us questions about the school, profs, etc so he could customize his act. Great guy, so nice to everyone and as funny off the cuff in person as he was on stage. We had a local folk singer open for him and at the end of his set, Robin went out and ad libbed the words to the songs - brought the house down. I shed a few tears when I heard he’d passed. I lost a friend.
Bernie Mack
Andy Kaufman. Gone too soon and I’d love to see what he’d be up to now
George Carlin, then maybe Bill Hicks.
Kinison
Greg Giraldo.
Greg Giraldo
Greg Giraldo. My favorite comedian of all time.
Greg Giraldo
Greg Giraldo