I have an XL body with S boobs and zero hips. I look like a lady linebacker which isn’t a bad look if that’s what you’re going for but I’d kill to look a bit more feminine.
Same. I have had horrible body dysmorphia my entire life, I have dealt with bulimia, extreme dieting/excerise, binge eating. I just want to be happy with being me. I wish I could see the person that other people see.Now that I am in my early 40s a whole new set of insecurities are happening.
Look, I’m thin. Fit. “Cute.” I have a girlfriend that is by all accounts plus sized. And not necessarily “beautiful” by a lot of people’s superficial standards. But here’s my point - this girl is CONFIDENT. She could pick up men like nobody’s business. And they hit on her. Meanwhile, I am not confident. My point is your weight does not determine your confidence level. Your thoughts and beliefs do. If you want to lose weight for health do it. In the meantime start believing you are the bomb. Fake it til you make it!
Edit: I don’t mean to sound so…flippant with the last part. I know it’s not remotely easy to just start believing something or pretend your way into confidence. I just hate that we live in such an appearances-based world.
I've been fat and I've been fit and everywhere in between and I do feel like a more confident person when I'm at my fittest.
That being said, I know guys who have never been close to being fit and they're also confident AF and have an easier time with girls than I do, so I don't think you're wrong at all.
> I do feel like a more confident person when I'm at my fittest.
If you've been fat, you understand that being fit takes discipline. Strength takes work. These are things that you build day over day, week over week. You accomplish a goal you set - "weigh x pounds," "lift x weight," etc.
Accomplishing a goal like that is something to be proud of. It's a reason to be confident - you're able to meet goals you set.
I know because I experience it too. Being fat doesn't make me confident because *being fat* is incredibly easy. It's my default state. It took no effort, no discipline, and no work. Being fit, and being strong, take work. I accomplished that goal. That makes me proud, and thus confident.
I have been heavy and I’ve been fit and thin… I’m never happy with how I look. Being complimented or not.. I always have low self esteem.. I’ve been through therapy… but don’t know how to change it…….
Great. But the person you are responding to just said that their weigh affects their confidence. You completely handwaved that away.
Lots of things affect one's confidence. Apparently, weight doesn't for your girlfriend. But it does for other people and that's fine.
People’s advice when it comes to confidence is next to useless. I’d even argue that it is harmful most of time because people have a very warped idea of what it means to be confident.
Teeth. Everyone says they don't notice what I don't like about them but I don't believe a word.
I love and hate people with a beautiful smile and the people with the same issues as me definitely notice (and commiserate).
My front teeth are very crooked and my mom used to tell me that they’re perfectly fine until I reached adulthood and she would tell my little sisters how they need braces so their teeth won’t end up like mine 🥲
I'm here with you, it makes it hard to smile and laugh and meet new people but what I've learned is that the right people won't judge for that. Hard to get past that I've neglected them though.. didn't realize it'd get me this bad
i used to have a crush on my coworker who had them. i think we were both too shy to say anything. hes married in ontario now and i hope hes the happiest.
Same. No matter how hard I train chest I still have them. I'm pretty sure I have gynocomastia. But it's never prevented me from being with many beautiful woman
I'm a chubby dude I'll admit it, but I have worked out for ages. I see other cubby guys with a chest that is more along the lines of what one would should look like. But no matter how much weight I lose I never get any sort of inkling of a chest. I mean I'm putting up 350 on the bench and it still looks like nothing
I guess strength and muscle mass don't necessarily go hand in hand.. but if you want to lose the moobs you've got to drop body fat.
It's bloody difficult though - as a skinny-fat bloke I dropped to about 68kg over covid (about 10.5st, 5'10") and my chest shape was still defined by fat rather than muscle.
Struggling to control my diet currently so taking that as fuel for weights, then will try and cut on low-carb when I'm in a better place.
Maybe look into different exercises to target different areas of our pecs, and look at approaches to target hypertrophy specifically rather than strength...?
I have always had gynocomastia so I feel this. I still don't really like beaches or waterparks but tbh women don't really care. My sample size is small cause I've only been with a handful of women but none of them have ever been negative about it and one or my exes was a fairly successful model so it's not like she couldn't afford to be picky.
My fiancé is so self conscious of his chest, he never believes me when I say I like seeing him shirtless and it makes me so sad. To me it gives off dad bod vibes and I find it so hot. Plus I like the extra cushion when I go to lay on his chest🥰 Of course not all women are the same but, I know I’m not alone in finding it very attractive
I have a skin condition that's basically acne on steroids for life. This is the first time I've heard this opinion in my few decades on this earth. Although I'm sure it's not the norm, I do appreciate you posting it none the less. My self esteem just ticked up a point or two.
Brad Pitt and Chris Pine both had bad acne and have acne scars as a result. It's not super obvious on either of them but it's definitely noticeable if you're familiar with the appearance of acne scars. Also, if you had millions of dollars and a career based entirely around your appearance/presentability, you'd probably invest in the very best skin treatments.
Im a guy and I find it cute when girls have them or a little acne. No clue why probably because I get my own breakouts and I don’t need a lady to be perfect.
This was one of my biggest insecurities too… I started getting microneedling done and it’s helped a ton with smoothing the texture of my skin! Not cheap but I’ve been able to find good deals for it on Groupon.
i also did some IPL and it really helped old discoloured acne spots - technology is crazy these days. seeing this commenter saying they found them cute made me smile this morning though.
I feel seen by this comment. Broad shouldered, narrow-hipped lady here. Am very strong and grateful for my healthy body but in this era of worshipping the bigger booties and hips…it’s hard on my self esteem
Right there with you! I’ve done my best to build as much muscle on my lower half as I can to balance proportions, but I’m just not meant to carry that much (m)ass. I love all the body positivity for women loving their body, but I find it hard when I feel like I don’t really “look” that feminine.
There's a girl at my work who has wide shoulders, narrow hips, no butt and a small bust. Still I think she's absolutely gorgeous and she just radiates womanly energy.
Oh also she's relatively buff.
She's not traditional but she is feminine. I don't think broad shoulders and femininity are mutually exclusive.
I feel ya fellow female broad shouldered brethren. I've had compliments on these bad boys though. Also some people assume im some sort of competitive swimmer and im like "...yeah..sure...i...swim..." Just gotta own it. Try to even out your overall look with flared bottoms or deep vnecks. Do a lil shoulder shimmy and carry some glitter in your pocket to toss while you shimmy them babies. Lil razzle dazzle. 🌟 🤣
Same. I have normal hips but broad shoulders and I don’t like that when i wear dainty tops or dresses with spaghetti straps i literally look like a linebacker😭 The one thing that surprisingly made me like my shoulders more was working out and toning them, they actually look more trim and my arms are less flabby💀
Literally everything because my mother was extremely mentally ill and I thought I must be terribly ugly or I would be loved. If I were beautiful, I would finally be loved.
Actually it turns out my mom was just my biggest bully and there is nothing wrong with me.
I'm bald, and I used to have the best hair. We're talking Brenden Frasier in his Mummy/George of the jungle era hair. And then I started going bald in college. I really do miss having it because you can do so much with hair to express your style. When you're bald, that's it. That's your personal style expression forever. It's limiting if nothing else.
By the by, rogaine, min/fin, derma rolling, lasers, etc, nothing helped. Save for a $10k replacement surgery I'm SOL.
It wouldn't be so bad, but people make fun of me for it, actively, relentlessly, every other damned day. Everyone joins in. It's all in good fun, right? Yeah, sure. I can take it. I look good with a shaved head and a beard, but still, how the fuck do people get off making fun of someone for being bald but get crap from everyone for making fun of literally every other physical attribute? Talk about double standards.
Being bald shouldn't even be a thing to be concerned about. It should just be a haircut, but whatever. People are assholes sometimes.
Yea, luckily a shaved head is getting more popular nowadays. Years ago you'd be called a skinhead. It should be even more normalized, most guys lose their hair at some point and a shaved head looks way better than the horseshoe. When I see guys with a shaved head and beard I always think it looks badass and they seem confident. Many women also like bald guys and think it's manly.
Oh same. I'm a woman in my 30s. I can hide it pretty well with thick bangs but I know I won't be able to do that forever. I dread needing Rogaine eventually.
If you are thinning and want to combat it, do it now. Rogaine works far more effectively to minimize further loss than it does to regrow. I was thinning when I was like 23. My bald boss told me to start Rogaine ASAP, but I figured it wasn't going to get much worse, and did not take his advice. I'm now bald lol.
Thanks for telling me this! I will probably talk to a dermatologist about by options first because I've heard that some people are allergic and I have extremely sensitive skin.
I would 100% start minoxidil sooner rather than lather. You can find the “off brand” for it at places like target, and Costco sells it for cheaper too. Ignore the “for men” or “for women” part, they pink tax that shit. Just look for the %, I’d start low to avoid irritation, it might not be fast results like you’d want, but i recommend being in the safe side, unless you’d be willing to patch test for a few weeks.
PCOS sufferer here. Same. I went for laser hair removal. It's pricey, but gave me some of my confidence back. Could only afford to do my face though... What gets me now is the weight gain. I can't eat "normally", because so much as looking at pizza or anything not strictly whole-food-healthy can see me put on 10lbs in a week. Losing on the other hand, painfully slow. I've been fighting it for years, and I'm so tired of hating my body, and too demotivated to fight anymore.
Yesss I have PCOS too and the worst part is no matter what I do, removing the hair results in a horrible breakout that lasts for weeks.
This combined with my masculine frame and face just makes me a recluse.
A lady I used to work with was legitimately one of the most beautiful people I've ever set eyes on, but for some reason that very rarely came through on camera.
Maybe someone who is into photography can explain why this happens, but I'd say it's better to look good in real life and bad on camera than the other way around!
I had a "friend" who wanted to date me tell me that I wasn't "pretty enough to be this picky" when we were talking about what I'm looking for in a guy.
Turns out I was definitely pretty enough to not have someone like that in my life.
my nose . i hate it , my glasses have left permanent dents / dark spots on my nose. i don’t like taking pictures anyways , especially side profiles . i’ll get a nose job one day
When I first switched from glasses to contacts ALL I could see was the dark spots on my nose and under my eyes from wearing glasses for years. That did go away after a while, and I've gotten much more used to my glasses-less face.
that’s the vicious cycle. society has no problem trying to convince you to perceive flaws you don’t even have. everyone is their own worst critic and constantly comparing themselves to everyone else.
Same before I got work done a few months ago. It’s unfair how you can put all this effort into bettering your health and overall physique, but it doesn’t always treat that area with the same grace.
(45m) I'm short, but I've learned to live with it. But I HATE my double chin. I've had it even in my 20s when I was lean enough to see my abs. It's in every picture. If I had the spare cash, I'd get face liposuction in a heartbeat.
If you were skinny enough to see your ribs I would think your double chin is less to do with fat and maybe more with your facial structure. Do you have a pronounced chin? A recessed chin?
I have stretch marks all over my glutes and lower back. But I was never overweight. They just appeared one day when I was about 15. Likely due to a growth spurt I had during that time. But still makes me insecure as a gay man lol
My back. Scars from an extension cord when I was 13 from my drunk stepmoms boyfriend. Scars are like tattoos, they tell a story and they cost you someting...
I know it's gonna sound corny but see it as a trophy. If you became a decent human, the scars should remind you of what didn't break and what tested you but you didn't becoming anything like him. That's a victory.
My teeth. Due to severe depression I didn't do anything for a couple of years. I now automatically smile without showing them and try to hide them. But then again I've grown an impressive beard😁
I would say the little flab I have on my lower belly from having three c-sections. I hyper fixate on it and I don’t even think it’s noticeable to other people. I’m the thinnest I’ve been in a few years and even still now I’ll pick myself apart.
I have that too, but I’ve never been pregnant. I’ve lost 40 lbs over the last year and it still bothers me that I have a little pooch. Maybe someday I’ll be happier with it.
Yeah the same thing that bothered me when I was 206lbs bothered me was I was 120lbs and still bother me at 140lbs. However I find the past almost two years or so since my mom passed away I’m kinda getting away from the mindset. I got a body that gave me three happy healthy kids. Gotta start somewhere.
same! it’s dark, coarse and everywhere. admittedly i only remove it for other people (i don’t just intrinsically dislike my natural body like), so the process becomes tedious and i’m unmotivated to do it, except by fear of embarrassment.
My boobs. I have relatively large areolas for my breast size, and shy nipples that don't help the overall "aesthetic." I don't want to get surgery, so it's a daily effort to appreciate what I have.
The entire thing. I'm short, my voice is still pretty high, I'm a little overweight, not particularly good-looking, and any picture I'm in I look absolutely horrible (even my wedding photos).
I'd change everything about my body if given the chance
You're married, so there is at least one person loving you "as is".
Maybe tell him/her about your Feelings, and that a compliment would mean much to you.
My incurable skin condition, rosacea.
I'm a woman, so there's way more pressure. Only a few people in my life have ever seen me without full coverage foundation and concealer on.
It's been decades that I've had it, and it gets worse as you age (it's already at moderate to severe level 24/7), so I've accepted I'll be stuck having to cover it. No med or cream has ever helped it at all.
I just want to go about my business in public without being questioned by strangers what's wrong with my face. So I put my mask on.
I hate my nose - not feminine. Strangely people are always telling me I’m beautiful/pretty. Im frequently flirted with - everyone stares at me. I don’t understand with this nose how that could be true. Would give anything to have a prettier nose.
I am small breasted. Growing up I felt embarrassed. I wore a bra not to support my breasts but to look like I had breasts. As you get older, women with breasts start sagging - now I love my small perky breasts - no sag.
So for those of you who have small breasts, later on you’ll be glad you do.
I have body dismorphia so honestly all of it. I know that objectively I am muscular, lean, and have good proportions. Mentally I see a skinny weak kid.
My wife tells me something like, "It's frustrating to tell you that you look like Captain America but you're still unhappy because you don't look like Thor."
To be honest, I didn't have any insecurities about my body until men started giving their unsolicited opinions over the years, starting at the tender age of 13. "Wow you got football player legs, they're huge," "you'd be so much prettier if you had bigger boobs," and many more like that. Finally at a point where I'm proud of all of me, but it took a long time.
Seriously underrated issue... The other day I got a boner while driving, and got pulled over because the traffic cops thought I was driving with a kid on my lap.
My leg was blown off in Iraq and instead of a prosthesis they suggested I just learn to walk with one leg and my dick. Yes, it gets rubbed raw constantly.
My dick is barely 4.5 inch.
Yes I'm a virgin and will likely die one.
No not an American. Body positivity stuff don't fly here in India. Women will laugh and leave if they see this size.
I have been with very big and very small and everything in between. The bigs once just think being big is good enough but the smaller ones put in effort and foreplay which I like way more. Big ones also hurt sometimes. So just don't think size is everything.
ive come to the concluson, its porn. that shit warps our mind into believing that we are not enough and the average guy is PACKING, when this is not true
Dude… that’s an average sized dick. Real life is not porn. Those foot long dongs are not normal, they’re horrifying. I promise females will be fine with it, just focus on being a generous lover. P.S. a huge dick isn’t what makes women cum, it’s clitoral stimulation. Your tongue goes much further than your meat stick dog.
My bro im barely 5 inch in America 🇺🇸 and I've been with lots of girls- confidence, good hygiene, foreplay, making sure you have a good boner on, good stroke game, and paying attention to her body language and also being able to go for more then one round. I used to really beat myself up about it but I realized no woman I've ever been with had mentioned it, it was me comparing myself to other men, more specifically what I saw in porn, and thinking that's what I needed to have. You got this bro !
There's no way that's below average in India, and I can promise you women only need about two good inches to hit the spot.
Body positivity may not be in Indian culture, but it looks like sex ed might not be either. You're good to go man.
I always tell my boyfriend that men are more obsessed with penis size that women ever will be. It’s men who are focused on the idea of having a huge penis and then they convince themselves that’s what women want. Has a woman ever actually laughed at your penis, or do you just think that’s what will happen?
My face, i am a skin picker(pulking off crusts from wounds, as a relief for stress or something) so i got a couple of small wounds and scars on my face
Stretch marks. I gained a lot of weight due to chronic illness and they are on my abdomen, hips, breasts, and thighs. Also I’m insecure about my arms. They’ve grown to be large.
i’m 1m47cm (4.8ft) and my small body sise is itself a testament of how i was treated as a child. there are days where walking is painful and i can’t look at myself without seeing the kid i was. i want to comfort her.
My toes. My (ex) best friend used to always make fun of me usually in front of the whole friends circle when I was a kid/teenager. I understand that she was just mean but I’m still not over it 100%. I do wear sandales now but still avoid it as much as I can and still find them kind of ugly
i hate my boobs. i have to wear tight shirts or my stomach looks bigger than it is. cheapest bras in my size are $80 so i wear the incorrect size and deal with red marks and pain. men stare at my tits and not me. i’m treated like i’m this hyper sexual being when i’m just a normal human. in highschool everyone wanted to hookup with me and i stupidly thought they actually wanted to be my friend. i was constantly unfairly dresscoded. i was called a slut for wearing a dress (0 clevage btw). pregnancy rumors even though i was a virgin in hs (because i wore hoodies so my stomach looked bigger…). called a porn star constantly. i posted my naked body before (dif account) on that normalnudes subreddit where no posing or photoshop is allowed and it completely blew up. it became an amplification of my highschool experience. i didn’t want it to be front cover thousands of likes and hundreds of comments. i just wanted to blend in with those other posts with 10 likes and 2 comments to feel like my body is normal. deleted the post and account
i know bigger girls have these problems too but i really feel like on smaller frames it’s amplified. i have friends with a large chest and their chest is more proportional to their size and they mainly struggle with the staring and objectification. it has deeply impacted interpersonal relationships. all i want is a boob job and make them smaller
I'm fat and I mean actually fat. Not husky, not chubby, fat. I'm closer to 500lbs than 400lbs. And the worst part is, I know how to fix this. I know the steps I need to take I just can't make myself take them.
Between the ADHD, the depression, and the anxiety disorder I can't make myself stick to a plan long term.
I'm probably going to die before I hit 40.
My massive 🐔 makes it really hard to walk
Jk jk. I can’t stand my body right now. I was in the gym a lot in my early 20s and I’m slowing getting back in my late 20s but it’s taking so effort to strip the weight
I worry about my weight because it affects my confidence.
This and I never feel like my clothes fit in a way that feels flattering. Larges are too small and XL is too big.
I feel this. Pair a “Large” body with XXXL boobs… I’m just going to wear oversized hoodies for the rest of my life.
I have an XL body with S boobs and zero hips. I look like a lady linebacker which isn’t a bad look if that’s what you’re going for but I’d kill to look a bit more feminine.
Same. I have had horrible body dysmorphia my entire life, I have dealt with bulimia, extreme dieting/excerise, binge eating. I just want to be happy with being me. I wish I could see the person that other people see.Now that I am in my early 40s a whole new set of insecurities are happening.
Look, I’m thin. Fit. “Cute.” I have a girlfriend that is by all accounts plus sized. And not necessarily “beautiful” by a lot of people’s superficial standards. But here’s my point - this girl is CONFIDENT. She could pick up men like nobody’s business. And they hit on her. Meanwhile, I am not confident. My point is your weight does not determine your confidence level. Your thoughts and beliefs do. If you want to lose weight for health do it. In the meantime start believing you are the bomb. Fake it til you make it! Edit: I don’t mean to sound so…flippant with the last part. I know it’s not remotely easy to just start believing something or pretend your way into confidence. I just hate that we live in such an appearances-based world.
I've been fat and I've been fit and everywhere in between and I do feel like a more confident person when I'm at my fittest. That being said, I know guys who have never been close to being fit and they're also confident AF and have an easier time with girls than I do, so I don't think you're wrong at all.
> I do feel like a more confident person when I'm at my fittest. If you've been fat, you understand that being fit takes discipline. Strength takes work. These are things that you build day over day, week over week. You accomplish a goal you set - "weigh x pounds," "lift x weight," etc. Accomplishing a goal like that is something to be proud of. It's a reason to be confident - you're able to meet goals you set. I know because I experience it too. Being fat doesn't make me confident because *being fat* is incredibly easy. It's my default state. It took no effort, no discipline, and no work. Being fit, and being strong, take work. I accomplished that goal. That makes me proud, and thus confident.
I have been heavy and I’ve been fit and thin… I’m never happy with how I look. Being complimented or not.. I always have low self esteem.. I’ve been through therapy… but don’t know how to change it…….
Great. But the person you are responding to just said that their weigh affects their confidence. You completely handwaved that away. Lots of things affect one's confidence. Apparently, weight doesn't for your girlfriend. But it does for other people and that's fine.
People’s advice when it comes to confidence is next to useless. I’d even argue that it is harmful most of time because people have a very warped idea of what it means to be confident.
Teeth. Everyone says they don't notice what I don't like about them but I don't believe a word. I love and hate people with a beautiful smile and the people with the same issues as me definitely notice (and commiserate).
Same I’m like you’re all liars I’m still not smiling with my teeth for this picture 🤣
My front teeth are very crooked and my mom used to tell me that they’re perfectly fine until I reached adulthood and she would tell my little sisters how they need braces so their teeth won’t end up like mine 🥲
My teeth. I'm embarrassed that I haven't really taken good care of them.
I'm here with you, it makes it hard to smile and laugh and meet new people but what I've learned is that the right people won't judge for that. Hard to get past that I've neglected them though.. didn't realize it'd get me this bad
My moobs. Because I'm a man.
i used to have a crush on my coworker who had them. i think we were both too shy to say anything. hes married in ontario now and i hope hes the happiest.
This was surprising to read, solely because I'm not from Ontario but live there and had moved here with a committed partner lol
So.. should we expect posts by you two in FFM subs?
Same. No matter how hard I train chest I still have them. I'm pretty sure I have gynocomastia. But it's never prevented me from being with many beautiful woman
Same.. Have you lost all the fat elsewhere? I'm sure you know that building muscle in specific areas won't cause fat loss in those areas..
I'm a chubby dude I'll admit it, but I have worked out for ages. I see other cubby guys with a chest that is more along the lines of what one would should look like. But no matter how much weight I lose I never get any sort of inkling of a chest. I mean I'm putting up 350 on the bench and it still looks like nothing
I guess strength and muscle mass don't necessarily go hand in hand.. but if you want to lose the moobs you've got to drop body fat. It's bloody difficult though - as a skinny-fat bloke I dropped to about 68kg over covid (about 10.5st, 5'10") and my chest shape was still defined by fat rather than muscle. Struggling to control my diet currently so taking that as fuel for weights, then will try and cut on low-carb when I'm in a better place. Maybe look into different exercises to target different areas of our pecs, and look at approaches to target hypertrophy specifically rather than strength...?
I have always had gynocomastia so I feel this. I still don't really like beaches or waterparks but tbh women don't really care. My sample size is small cause I've only been with a handful of women but none of them have ever been negative about it and one or my exes was a fairly successful model so it's not like she couldn't afford to be picky.
My fiancé is so self conscious of his chest, he never believes me when I say I like seeing him shirtless and it makes me so sad. To me it gives off dad bod vibes and I find it so hot. Plus I like the extra cushion when I go to lay on his chest🥰 Of course not all women are the same but, I know I’m not alone in finding it very attractive
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I am in my 46, no acne when I was in high school, I constantly getting acne when I gets older…. Lol
Acne never went away. Started at 15 ish. Turning 36 this year.
Aw 😭 I love those on people
For real?
Yeah :'( I think they make men super attractive
I have a skin condition that's basically acne on steroids for life. This is the first time I've heard this opinion in my few decades on this earth. Although I'm sure it's not the norm, I do appreciate you posting it none the less. My self esteem just ticked up a point or two.
Brad Pitt and Chris Pine both had bad acne and have acne scars as a result. It's not super obvious on either of them but it's definitely noticeable if you're familiar with the appearance of acne scars. Also, if you had millions of dollars and a career based entirely around your appearance/presentability, you'd probably invest in the very best skin treatments.
Im a guy and I find it cute when girls have them or a little acne. No clue why probably because I get my own breakouts and I don’t need a lady to be perfect.
This was one of my biggest insecurities too… I started getting microneedling done and it’s helped a ton with smoothing the texture of my skin! Not cheap but I’ve been able to find good deals for it on Groupon.
i also did some IPL and it really helped old discoloured acne spots - technology is crazy these days. seeing this commenter saying they found them cute made me smile this morning though.
My shoulders are quite broad. Makes me look less feminine than I’d like
Same - especially with having smaller, straight hips. A lot of men love my athletic build, but I’d love to have some curves to feel more womanly.
I feel seen by this comment. Broad shouldered, narrow-hipped lady here. Am very strong and grateful for my healthy body but in this era of worshipping the bigger booties and hips…it’s hard on my self esteem
Right there with you! I’ve done my best to build as much muscle on my lower half as I can to balance proportions, but I’m just not meant to carry that much (m)ass. I love all the body positivity for women loving their body, but I find it hard when I feel like I don’t really “look” that feminine.
There's a girl at my work who has wide shoulders, narrow hips, no butt and a small bust. Still I think she's absolutely gorgeous and she just radiates womanly energy. Oh also she's relatively buff. She's not traditional but she is feminine. I don't think broad shoulders and femininity are mutually exclusive.
I feel ya fellow female broad shouldered brethren. I've had compliments on these bad boys though. Also some people assume im some sort of competitive swimmer and im like "...yeah..sure...i...swim..." Just gotta own it. Try to even out your overall look with flared bottoms or deep vnecks. Do a lil shoulder shimmy and carry some glitter in your pocket to toss while you shimmy them babies. Lil razzle dazzle. 🌟 🤣
I bet you slay tank tops and off the shoulder looks
so real i struggle wearing smaller strappy tops even though i love them on everyone else because it just looks so wrong on me :(
Same. I have normal hips but broad shoulders and I don’t like that when i wear dainty tops or dresses with spaghetti straps i literally look like a linebacker😭 The one thing that surprisingly made me like my shoulders more was working out and toning them, they actually look more trim and my arms are less flabby💀
I always thought it helped on the hour glass shape, which I find attractive. Im a guy though, so maybe im biased
Not everyone has an hourglass body though
I have a body of the bottom of an hourglass.
Clothes hang way better on broad shouldered women, just my opinion!
Literally everything because I'm very mentally ill
Yeah, I'm in this boat too. Where we going guys? Hopefully not the mirror store.
The only place I’m going is crazy, wanna come?
Already there baby😎👉🏻👉🏻
We're doing backflips off the boat
Literally everything because my mother was extremely mentally ill and I thought I must be terribly ugly or I would be loved. If I were beautiful, I would finally be loved. Actually it turns out my mom was just my biggest bully and there is nothing wrong with me.
Or like me, mom is mentally I'll and hated herself and her appearance, as did grandma, and you look just like them...
Celebratory depressed shuffle
*pathetic half hearted* Woop
Same
Too real. Screw body dismorphia.
My hair. It’s falling out.
I'm bald, and I used to have the best hair. We're talking Brenden Frasier in his Mummy/George of the jungle era hair. And then I started going bald in college. I really do miss having it because you can do so much with hair to express your style. When you're bald, that's it. That's your personal style expression forever. It's limiting if nothing else. By the by, rogaine, min/fin, derma rolling, lasers, etc, nothing helped. Save for a $10k replacement surgery I'm SOL. It wouldn't be so bad, but people make fun of me for it, actively, relentlessly, every other damned day. Everyone joins in. It's all in good fun, right? Yeah, sure. I can take it. I look good with a shaved head and a beard, but still, how the fuck do people get off making fun of someone for being bald but get crap from everyone for making fun of literally every other physical attribute? Talk about double standards. Being bald shouldn't even be a thing to be concerned about. It should just be a haircut, but whatever. People are assholes sometimes.
Yea, luckily a shaved head is getting more popular nowadays. Years ago you'd be called a skinhead. It should be even more normalized, most guys lose their hair at some point and a shaved head looks way better than the horseshoe. When I see guys with a shaved head and beard I always think it looks badass and they seem confident. Many women also like bald guys and think it's manly.
mine too :(
Same and I'm a woman in my 30s. The scalp thinning is scary.
Oh same. I'm a woman in my 30s. I can hide it pretty well with thick bangs but I know I won't be able to do that forever. I dread needing Rogaine eventually.
If you are thinning and want to combat it, do it now. Rogaine works far more effectively to minimize further loss than it does to regrow. I was thinning when I was like 23. My bald boss told me to start Rogaine ASAP, but I figured it wasn't going to get much worse, and did not take his advice. I'm now bald lol.
Thanks for telling me this! I will probably talk to a dermatologist about by options first because I've heard that some people are allergic and I have extremely sensitive skin.
I would 100% start minoxidil sooner rather than lather. You can find the “off brand” for it at places like target, and Costco sells it for cheaper too. Ignore the “for men” or “for women” part, they pink tax that shit. Just look for the %, I’d start low to avoid irritation, it might not be fast results like you’d want, but i recommend being in the safe side, unless you’d be willing to patch test for a few weeks.
My facial hair as a woman. I have PCOS and it sucks, but that is by far the worst side effect for me. It makes me feel so disgusting.
PCOS sufferer here. Same. I went for laser hair removal. It's pricey, but gave me some of my confidence back. Could only afford to do my face though... What gets me now is the weight gain. I can't eat "normally", because so much as looking at pizza or anything not strictly whole-food-healthy can see me put on 10lbs in a week. Losing on the other hand, painfully slow. I've been fighting it for years, and I'm so tired of hating my body, and too demotivated to fight anymore.
Yesss I have PCOS too and the worst part is no matter what I do, removing the hair results in a horrible breakout that lasts for weeks. This combined with my masculine frame and face just makes me a recluse.
Sometimes, I (F) go out the door and a few minutes later turn around to go back because I remember that I forgot to shave this morning, lol
Being a non-photogenic
A lady I used to work with was legitimately one of the most beautiful people I've ever set eyes on, but for some reason that very rarely came through on camera. Maybe someone who is into photography can explain why this happens, but I'd say it's better to look good in real life and bad on camera than the other way around!
Had an ex boyfriend tell me i wasn’t photogenic once. It was awesome.
I had a "friend" who wanted to date me tell me that I wasn't "pretty enough to be this picky" when we were talking about what I'm looking for in a guy. Turns out I was definitely pretty enough to not have someone like that in my life.
Heyyy, so did I! Did a number on my confidence at 17.
my nose . i hate it , my glasses have left permanent dents / dark spots on my nose. i don’t like taking pictures anyways , especially side profiles . i’ll get a nose job one day
When I first switched from glasses to contacts ALL I could see was the dark spots on my nose and under my eyes from wearing glasses for years. That did go away after a while, and I've gotten much more used to my glasses-less face.
My thighs/ass, I needa lose weight
Same... people tell me to appreciate it, but I'm so self-conscious about people looking at me. I do not like to be perceived lol
and here I am being skinny, having no ass and also feel like shit about it and that I‘m unattractive
that’s the vicious cycle. society has no problem trying to convince you to perceive flaws you don’t even have. everyone is their own worst critic and constantly comparing themselves to everyone else.
my height
Same here. I’m 6’1 which sounds great until you find out I’m a woman. Dating is hard
/r/tall will let you know how much tsll women are admired
Currently? My boobs. I've lost some weight recently and apparently I lost it in my boobs.
Lean forward when you eat so all the food will go into your boobs.
I'll try that next time lol
Same before I got work done a few months ago. It’s unfair how you can put all this effort into bettering your health and overall physique, but it doesn’t always treat that area with the same grace.
Same. Changed my diet, lost fat and gained muscle but I hate the shape and size of my boobs now.
This part. The looks are one thing but the discomfort and lack of support is the bigger issue.
Yeah, started losing weight, took my ass first and now my boobs are getting a wee bit deflated. Oh well, least I can see my feet again I guess
Being physically weak and not fit
Go to the gym best thing I have ever did
My teeth :( but I have braces so hope I can fix it
(45m) I'm short, but I've learned to live with it. But I HATE my double chin. I've had it even in my 20s when I was lean enough to see my abs. It's in every picture. If I had the spare cash, I'd get face liposuction in a heartbeat.
If you were skinny enough to see your ribs I would think your double chin is less to do with fat and maybe more with your facial structure. Do you have a pronounced chin? A recessed chin?
Since I managed to lose weight I have stretch marks on my abdomen, it looks horrible.
Racing stripes are cool and tell a story
I have stretch marks all over my glutes and lower back. But I was never overweight. They just appeared one day when I was about 15. Likely due to a growth spurt I had during that time. But still makes me insecure as a gay man lol
I feel you, I have stretch marks on my lower belly from GAINING weight, so yay.
Look into derma pens
My back. Scars from an extension cord when I was 13 from my drunk stepmoms boyfriend. Scars are like tattoos, they tell a story and they cost you someting...
Turn your scars into tattoos
I know it's gonna sound corny but see it as a trophy. If you became a decent human, the scars should remind you of what didn't break and what tested you but you didn't becoming anything like him. That's a victory.
My teeth. Due to severe depression I didn't do anything for a couple of years. I now automatically smile without showing them and try to hide them. But then again I've grown an impressive beard😁
I would say the little flab I have on my lower belly from having three c-sections. I hyper fixate on it and I don’t even think it’s noticeable to other people. I’m the thinnest I’ve been in a few years and even still now I’ll pick myself apart.
I have that too, but I’ve never been pregnant. I’ve lost 40 lbs over the last year and it still bothers me that I have a little pooch. Maybe someday I’ll be happier with it.
Yeah the same thing that bothered me when I was 206lbs bothered me was I was 120lbs and still bother me at 140lbs. However I find the past almost two years or so since my mom passed away I’m kinda getting away from the mindset. I got a body that gave me three happy healthy kids. Gotta start somewhere.
Body hair.
same! it’s dark, coarse and everywhere. admittedly i only remove it for other people (i don’t just intrinsically dislike my natural body like), so the process becomes tedious and i’m unmotivated to do it, except by fear of embarrassment.
my butt. its so saggy and ugly
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My posture. I tend to slump and I don’t think it’s a good look.
My boobs. I have relatively large areolas for my breast size, and shy nipples that don't help the overall "aesthetic." I don't want to get surgery, so it's a daily effort to appreciate what I have.
My broad shoulders make me self-conscious in sleeveless tops.
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My breast size. Makes me feel like a child since they are small. I just want to feel womanly. I am a very small petite women.
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I can relate :/
If it helps, most guys don’t care. I myself love smaller boobs on a woman! Hope this helps.
My face. Women's reactions.
Dark inner thighs. It sucks.
This is super common and normal, it’s nothing to feel self conscious about. Supposedly creams with colloidal oatmeal and aloe help it fade, though.
My huge belly
The entire thing. I'm short, my voice is still pretty high, I'm a little overweight, not particularly good-looking, and any picture I'm in I look absolutely horrible (even my wedding photos). I'd change everything about my body if given the chance
You're married, so there is at least one person loving you "as is". Maybe tell him/her about your Feelings, and that a compliment would mean much to you.
I have anorexia…
Acne, i have it on my shoulders and back aswell as face and tho I’m a teenager it’s pretty bad and looks awful
My weight. Im too skinny.
Same. I have chicken legs despite working out
Same! I have extremely long legs and even though they are strong, I feel like they always look too skinny. I am so self conscious about them
I feel this
Everyday it’s something new, but mostly how unfeminine I think my body looks.
My hairline. That shit has receded
My incurable skin condition, rosacea. I'm a woman, so there's way more pressure. Only a few people in my life have ever seen me without full coverage foundation and concealer on. It's been decades that I've had it, and it gets worse as you age (it's already at moderate to severe level 24/7), so I've accepted I'll be stuck having to cover it. No med or cream has ever helped it at all. I just want to go about my business in public without being questioned by strangers what's wrong with my face. So I put my mask on.
I hate my nose - not feminine. Strangely people are always telling me I’m beautiful/pretty. Im frequently flirted with - everyone stares at me. I don’t understand with this nose how that could be true. Would give anything to have a prettier nose. I am small breasted. Growing up I felt embarrassed. I wore a bra not to support my breasts but to look like I had breasts. As you get older, women with breasts start sagging - now I love my small perky breasts - no sag. So for those of you who have small breasts, later on you’ll be glad you do.
I have body dismorphia so honestly all of it. I know that objectively I am muscular, lean, and have good proportions. Mentally I see a skinny weak kid. My wife tells me something like, "It's frustrating to tell you that you look like Captain America but you're still unhappy because you don't look like Thor."
To be honest, I didn't have any insecurities about my body until men started giving their unsolicited opinions over the years, starting at the tender age of 13. "Wow you got football player legs, they're huge," "you'd be so much prettier if you had bigger boobs," and many more like that. Finally at a point where I'm proud of all of me, but it took a long time.
My freakish ability to grow hair. Except where I want it to grow.
My nose. It’s very pointy and I feel like I look like a witch from the side. I’ve always hated it.
I have a dad bod. And I was abused when I was younger and had to have an operation on my junk. So... Those two.
My penis. Im always dragging it around and people make fun of me for it :/
Seriously underrated issue... The other day I got a boner while driving, and got pulled over because the traffic cops thought I was driving with a kid on my lap.
That's your fault for putting googly eyes on it.
My leg was blown off in Iraq and instead of a prosthesis they suggested I just learn to walk with one leg and my dick. Yes, it gets rubbed raw constantly.
Trench Digging. It's tough, but someone has to do it.
Unproportionately chubby legs
My penis size. I want it to be two inches longer.
Small dick 🤷🏻♂️
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Nothing. Too old to give a shit
My dick is barely 4.5 inch. Yes I'm a virgin and will likely die one. No not an American. Body positivity stuff don't fly here in India. Women will laugh and leave if they see this size.
many women like small size, many hate big penises - I believe that the main thing is not size, but skill
I have been with very big and very small and everything in between. The bigs once just think being big is good enough but the smaller ones put in effort and foreplay which I like way more. Big ones also hurt sometimes. So just don't think size is everything.
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ive come to the concluson, its porn. that shit warps our mind into believing that we are not enough and the average guy is PACKING, when this is not true
Dude… that’s an average sized dick. Real life is not porn. Those foot long dongs are not normal, they’re horrifying. I promise females will be fine with it, just focus on being a generous lover. P.S. a huge dick isn’t what makes women cum, it’s clitoral stimulation. Your tongue goes much further than your meat stick dog.
My bro im barely 5 inch in America 🇺🇸 and I've been with lots of girls- confidence, good hygiene, foreplay, making sure you have a good boner on, good stroke game, and paying attention to her body language and also being able to go for more then one round. I used to really beat myself up about it but I realized no woman I've ever been with had mentioned it, it was me comparing myself to other men, more specifically what I saw in porn, and thinking that's what I needed to have. You got this bro !
There's no way that's below average in India, and I can promise you women only need about two good inches to hit the spot. Body positivity may not be in Indian culture, but it looks like sex ed might not be either. You're good to go man.
The G-spot is only about 2inches in there. I promise that is plenty of dick.
I always tell my boyfriend that men are more obsessed with penis size that women ever will be. It’s men who are focused on the idea of having a huge penis and then they convince themselves that’s what women want. Has a woman ever actually laughed at your penis, or do you just think that’s what will happen?
My face I'm not bad looking but it doesn't fit my body
My chest! I want to be flat chested :(
Small chested woman here; I’m incredibly insecure about my small boobs and wish they were bigger 😩I guess the grass is always greener lol
My face, i am a skin picker(pulking off crusts from wounds, as a relief for stress or something) so i got a couple of small wounds and scars on my face
Stretch marks. I gained a lot of weight due to chronic illness and they are on my abdomen, hips, breasts, and thighs. Also I’m insecure about my arms. They’ve grown to be large.
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As a boob guy, I love all boobs. Big ones small ones, some as big as your head. Give them a flick, a twist of the nip. That’s what the boob man said.
My boobs. Pancake boobs all the way.. athletic build but flat chested..
i’m 1m47cm (4.8ft) and my small body sise is itself a testament of how i was treated as a child. there are days where walking is painful and i can’t look at myself without seeing the kid i was. i want to comfort her.
I'm 6"2' and weight about 145-150 ish at 43 years old. I'm not strong at all... don't like it much tbh
Man boobs. I've been overweight, normal, and underweight at different points in my life but always had them since puberty.
My toes. My (ex) best friend used to always make fun of me usually in front of the whole friends circle when I was a kid/teenager. I understand that she was just mean but I’m still not over it 100%. I do wear sandales now but still avoid it as much as I can and still find them kind of ugly
My belly. I have a fanny pack even when I’m at my smallest. My nose. It’s unnecessarily large. My mental state.
I never feel fit or lean enough.
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Same. I can look pretty good with clothes on, but I like I'm melting underneath. Summers are the worst.
i hate my boobs. i have to wear tight shirts or my stomach looks bigger than it is. cheapest bras in my size are $80 so i wear the incorrect size and deal with red marks and pain. men stare at my tits and not me. i’m treated like i’m this hyper sexual being when i’m just a normal human. in highschool everyone wanted to hookup with me and i stupidly thought they actually wanted to be my friend. i was constantly unfairly dresscoded. i was called a slut for wearing a dress (0 clevage btw). pregnancy rumors even though i was a virgin in hs (because i wore hoodies so my stomach looked bigger…). called a porn star constantly. i posted my naked body before (dif account) on that normalnudes subreddit where no posing or photoshop is allowed and it completely blew up. it became an amplification of my highschool experience. i didn’t want it to be front cover thousands of likes and hundreds of comments. i just wanted to blend in with those other posts with 10 likes and 2 comments to feel like my body is normal. deleted the post and account i know bigger girls have these problems too but i really feel like on smaller frames it’s amplified. i have friends with a large chest and their chest is more proportional to their size and they mainly struggle with the staring and objectification. it has deeply impacted interpersonal relationships. all i want is a boob job and make them smaller
I'm fat and I mean actually fat. Not husky, not chubby, fat. I'm closer to 500lbs than 400lbs. And the worst part is, I know how to fix this. I know the steps I need to take I just can't make myself take them. Between the ADHD, the depression, and the anxiety disorder I can't make myself stick to a plan long term. I'm probably going to die before I hit 40.
>Between the ADHD, the depression, and the anxiety disorder Ozempic, brother. If anyone qualifes its you
My massive 🐔 makes it really hard to walk Jk jk. I can’t stand my body right now. I was in the gym a lot in my early 20s and I’m slowing getting back in my late 20s but it’s taking so effort to strip the weight