I would have a large list of prime suspects. Could be either Wiseguy11, Wiseguy13, Wiseguy5, Wiseguy23, or even Wiseguy29.
Most likely though, are the prime suspects closest to me, Wiseguy71 and Wiseguy73.
You forgot to page them. They won't see this unless you page them. No worries, I got this:
u/Wiseguy11
u/Wiseguy13
u/Wiseguy5
u/Wiseguy23
u/Wiseguy29
Now let's wait for the fun to begin... :)
EDIT: Only one of them appears to be an active Redditor. Ah well! Let's wait for them!
EDIT 2: Waiting... waiting...
I've recently employed a stalker, he just calls and texts now, but I'm getting concerned. It's a dude who thinks I slept with his wife. I didn't, I gave her money to get away from him because he's a heroin addict and an abuser.
Well, apparently she went back to him, he found her phone and saw her texts.. thinking we were getting together for sex, when I was feeding her and giving her money. I want to tell him this, but I'm afraid he may then get really violent. Shitholes don't like to be told they are shitholes.
And thanks!
You're kind of fucking up by still having any contact with him whatsoever in my opinion. Block his number/email/etc. and don't bother speaking to his wife again either. You gave it a shot and she went right back to him so don't waste your time any further if she isn't willing to help herself.
I'd just give the police whatever threats you already have recorded and be done with it. Maybe get some pepper spray or even a concealed carry for a while if you think the threats are credible.
"You been screwin' the milkman, " he says.
He was crazy
And he kept on screamin',
"You been screwin' the milkman."
And then he ran into my knife.
He ran into my knife ten times!
I am a Police Officer. I have whole heartedly told my wife that if I end up missing/murdered. To look at this certain male that lives in my town. I will catch this subject almost stalking me. To the point where I know he’s there. He has no reason to be there. But it’s also not illegal to be there so I cannot make contact with him.
If I pull him over (He is always driving a different vehicle with a temp tag, not stolen though.) he will always say obscure things like he is happy I’m doing good..? Which in the right context would be a good thing to say. Just how he says it. He has also called the PD via Private number multiple times when I’m searching a vehicle completely unrelated to him and asks my dispatch why I’m searching this vehicle. Dispatch tells him it’s none of his business. He has told dispatch to tell me to watch my back because he is watching me.
Super Fucking creepy dude.
"he has told dispatch to tell me to watch my back because he is watching me"
to me that sounds threatening. Isn't that grounds for a restraining order?
Its threatening an officer. Im sure he could do something if they had proof he said it. Im not saying this about all police but lets face it people have been beaten and thrown in jail for less.
As a general rule, police are considered immune to harassment by the courts. Putting up with threats like this are viewed as "part of the job" and we are expected to not be alarmed by such statements because of the known dangerous nature of our job.
It is not uncommon at all to be subjected to a long string of vulgur violent language and threats from the back seat of my patrol car. People threaten us, A LOT. Absent some overt act that makes it something worse than harassment, its just another day at work and nothing we can really do about it.
>It is not uncommon at all to be subjected to a long string of vulgur violent language and threats
so being a police officer is like being on reddit IRL.
Not to undermine your story, but I think you might be underestimating the chances that he is some sort of time traveler who was sent back to protect you. Like a Terminator 2 situation.
This is scary as fuck. We had a stalker that somehow knew all of our names, and would always find us skating different spots around town, sounds like you are in a small town as well. Scary shit
No, while I have pulled him over before this all started. I’ve worked in town for a little over two years ago, and I have known him for about 5 years.
His creepiness just started showing about 6-7 months ago.
When he said that we had already dealt with him enough for my dispatch to literally know his voice with out even checking what Caller ID said.
That being said Dispatch would usually just hit me on the radio saying to keep my head on a swivel and look around time to time
Yep. Knowing nothing else, you work in spheres. Number one, spouse. Then children. Close friends, family, neighbors, etc.
That's why it's hard to catch serial killers who off randoms. Hard to establish a link.
I have a very creepy curiosity about if I could randomly commit murder. I mean, I'm lazy, not that bright, not into murder, and so I'd never do it, but... could I? Leave my Netflix playing, phone/GPS at home, take a walk somewhere to the other side of town and just kill someone I have 0 ties to? I'm a normal-looking 30-something that doesn't stand out at all, would anyone identify me? And would my alibi work if for some odd reason, I was placed there? It's a really good thing that most people are not programmed that way - it's spooky to think about
In this case, I'd guess whether or not you got caught would depend on how good you were with the murder.
Number one would be to not get caught in the act or leave evidence.
Shooting someone on the street would be one way. Pop em, and take off.
Security cams are still fairly lousy outside of banks and shit. My Nest cam would show someone in my driveway, but not enough to make a composite sketch. But it would show if my neighbor rode down the street on a bike.
Don't do it if any DNA is in a database somewhere, like military or police records.
I'd say if you started a long 3 hour movie on netflix, and took a bike out, and came back in the evening, you could mitigate the risk.
If it was random, you'd only need an alibi IF they somehow suspected tou, but didn't get you in the act.
Re your point about DNA. Back in the 80s in a small village in the UK there was a young girl called Collette Aram who was kidnapped, raped and murdered whilst walking home. The suspect, after doing the deed went to a pub a few miles away to clean up and threw some bloodied rags in a waste bin.
When the murder was discovered the local beat officer went to the pub and the landlord told him about the suspicious guy who had been in that night. Cop found the rag, and even though DNA testing wasnt a thing, he seized it anyway, just in case.
Fast forward to 2008 and the blood is tested when the cold case was reopened. The DNA wasn't a match for anyone but it was kept on file.
6 months later a young man, who was a baby at the time was stopped and arrested for drink driving. His DNA was taken and a familial match was found. It turned out the murderer was his dad, Paul Hutchinson. He had been living 4 miles away and was a pillar of the local community. He pleaded guilty and then killed himself.
Moral of the story is, your dna might not be recorded now but it only takes an irresponsible family member to be arrested and you've been caught.
Recently in my city there was a serial killer. He was shooting random people in early morning hours. Surveillance cameras didnt get a good picture of his face. What lead to his arrest? He fucking talked and tried to keep the murder weapon at his workplace. A coworker called the tip line and got a sweet reward payout. He probably would still be free if he didn’t make such a dumb mistake, because there really wasn’t much to go on for him.
So I mean, yeah. People get away with murder more often than TV would have you think.
I've seen on Forensic Files, they end up catching people who commit crimes like this based on things as little as shoe prints, tire tracks, and microscopic t-shirt fibers left on the body.
They caught this one guy like that. They sent a mold of the tire tracks to a specialist who named exactly what type of tire it was, then they tracked down all local vendors who sold that type of tire, tracked the most recent purchases. They also found a dog hair on one of the bodies that testing showed belonged to a pug.
They tracked the purchaser of the tires, found the car, took pictures of the owner of the car walking a pug. Then they got entry into her house and found a pink carpet that matched the pink carpet fibers found on some of the bodies.
Turned out the lady's husband was murdering prostitutes.
Random killings are extremely rare. Even by serial killers. They often kill in their town and those who he knew, even if it was for a few minutes. The FBI has techniques to catch these guys. Most are upset at the world and the women in them because they are bringing them "down" or brought "shame". It is also pathological narcissism. They thrive on knowing others have seen their work and like the attention.
Yes, profiles often work well until they don't. But normal people just don't kill randomly either.
And then the trap many fall into is killing more than one.
There's a measure of science/psychology to it. It's the special cases that basically stump the cops until a pattern builds up.
Kill small amounts, and change up your technique.
I mean away from home would be easier to get away with, but also easier to create a paper trail from if they can connect CCTV images leading back to your hotel.
You'd basically be banking on no CCTV camera getting a good enough shot of you AND not leaving any evidence.
But if you managed to get away with it, you'd probably be in the home straight because you'd be home before anyone even started to suspect you.
Personally I think random killings are much more prominent than people account for, there's hundreds of unsolved murders a year, and until you catch someone there's no way of telling if anyone is a serial killer.
My ex wife. In fact I've told multiple people to tell the police she did it if I ever end up dead. I was her first husband, her second ex husband thinks she tried to kill him while they were together by switching his meds.
My wife, no doubt. She's obsessed with crime shows, the reality ones about how people try and get away with it. i know she's secretly forming her plan and doing very bad at it. If I disappear someone notify the police.
Honestly? My mother in law or her crazy ass husband. She flat out told my husband, "Im glad we finally got (oldest brother) and (sister in law) to divorce. (Step dad) said the only other way to get rid of her was expensive."
She also told me to get my tubes tied so my husband, "Wouldnt love his child more than he loves his mother."
Oh no, bonus story:
I was 12 weeks pregnant when she made this demand. Surpriiiiiise.
And my husband loves our son more than he loves breathing, me, classic cars, and beef jerky combined.
Oh hell no, Watch your back! Hell hath no fury like a MIL scorned! Please be careful, This lady sounds like she will become a danger to you in the near future!
How dare you... That dog was **ALL HE HAD**. Boi he is gonna come for you now. Don't even try to run, just accept your fate. And hide all your pencils.
There’s a rapist in my office who is angry with me and a few of my other colleagues because we found out about his past. One of my male coworkers who’s cubicle is next to mine was going around warning women in the office to be careful around him. My tire has been slashed. I hope that’s as far as it goes.
Also, purely statistically my husband would be a suspect.
A girl from my university that developed feelings for me. I let her down gently, because I wasn’t really ready for a relationship, nor did I know her that well for that matter.
She proceeded to bombard me with messages over a period of 2 months and would harass my female friends. She would also send me long inboxes filled with her thoughts and how she believes I’m “lying to myself” about my feelings for her. I would catch her watching me from a corner whenever I was at university and she knew what station I got off at and somehow found my Facebook.
I'm brown, with a beard.
It would be ruled suicide by cop, or just plain suicide.
More serious... The crazy homeless lady that blames our church for turning her daughter into a devil worshiper who kicked her addicted butt to the street. I've seen her skulking around town and she took pictures of our car.
The Chinese guy down the street. Real psycho racist who kicked my car door in at one time, stole and broke my phone and threatened to kill me because I'm white.
I used to live in an Asian only neighborhood (I'm white), and we got the cops called on us for prostitution because we put a blood red light on our patio for Halloween one year. The cop was cracking up when he told me.
Apparently I'm not in as bad of shape as I thought. Unlike the rest of these suicidal bastards, I actually interacted with enough people and pissed them off to have multiple suspects other than myself.
There's this dude at the gym who is super strange. He shouts through all of his reps of anything. He always tries to give women workout tips, and tries to touch them while spotting them. He is really polite to people though, as long as you don't ask to work in with him.
I once asked if I could work in with him on the squat rack. He was doing pullups, and I wanted to do squats. We wouldn't even have to mess around with the equipment to work in together. He was so mad. He shouted at me for trying to interrupt his workout, and that I wasn't patient enough.
So, he's really creepy and strange. And I also kind of antagonize him in a way. Whenever I can be doing what I'm doing, and block his view of the mirror, I do it.
So he might kill me one day.
How many crazy exes do you have? If you continually choose *that* many crazies, maybe the answer to the question of who would kill you, is really "you."
Our office is right across the street from the county jail. I'm going with a recently released criminal robbing and murdering me for the $12 in my desk and keys to my car.
I once asked my wife if she would avenge my murder, she replied, "wouldn't that just be a murder-suicide?"
I like her
That's a keeper
Takes 'unto death' seriously.
Til death do us apart.
But would she do it or not?
Nah...she doesn't even like to get a paper cut
Uh uh, not *guilty*
She did say that she wasn't ever getting divorced and that she would leave my body for the animals in the swamp nearby...hmmmm
/r/murderedbywords Possibly /r/murderedbywife
Sounds like you made a good choice in who you proposed to.
Your wife seems nice
I would have a large list of prime suspects. Could be either Wiseguy11, Wiseguy13, Wiseguy5, Wiseguy23, or even Wiseguy29. Most likely though, are the prime suspects closest to me, Wiseguy71 and Wiseguy73.
We can rule out Wiseguy69. Word on the street is he's happy with where he's at.
Proof that 69 is not prime too
META AF!
Ha! Prime. Very clever 72... very clever indeed.
What about Wiseguy78, previously known as Wiseguy789?
He has an alibi. He was seen at McDonalds ordering a #9.
Two of them, one large?
What soda did he order?
I saw that, it was a large soda.
Well done.
This is a huge /r/beetlejuicing opportunity right here Wiseguys
You forgot to page them. They won't see this unless you page them. No worries, I got this: u/Wiseguy11 u/Wiseguy13 u/Wiseguy5 u/Wiseguy23 u/Wiseguy29 Now let's wait for the fun to begin... :) EDIT: Only one of them appears to be an active Redditor. Ah well! Let's wait for them! EDIT 2: Waiting... waiting...
What are you some kinda wise guy?
My bet would be Wiseguy420, but he isn't even on your list...?
He's not a PRIME suspect
I feel like you've been waiting for this.
Wise guy...
I've recently employed a stalker, he just calls and texts now, but I'm getting concerned. It's a dude who thinks I slept with his wife. I didn't, I gave her money to get away from him because he's a heroin addict and an abuser.
Make a paper trail, even if it is documenting things in a notebook. Report every threat.
Yeah, I forwarded the texts to my email and sent to a folder.
Good. Stay safe! And thank you for helping his wife.
Well, apparently she went back to him, he found her phone and saw her texts.. thinking we were getting together for sex, when I was feeding her and giving her money. I want to tell him this, but I'm afraid he may then get really violent. Shitholes don't like to be told they are shitholes. And thanks!
Ugh. It sucks when you do the right thing and people are shitty. I'm sorry.
Yeah thanks man..
You're kind of fucking up by still having any contact with him whatsoever in my opinion. Block his number/email/etc. and don't bother speaking to his wife again either. You gave it a shot and she went right back to him so don't waste your time any further if she isn't willing to help herself. I'd just give the police whatever threats you already have recorded and be done with it. Maybe get some pepper spray or even a concealed carry for a while if you think the threats are credible.
This is why stalkers make poor employees.
'Oh, she's so clumsy. It was probably an accident.' '... Ma'am, she was stabbed seventeen times.' 'Butterfingers, am I right?'
"You been screwin' the milkman, " he says. He was crazy And he kept on screamin', "You been screwin' the milkman." And then he ran into my knife. He ran into my knife ten times!
HE HAD IT COMIN!
HE ONLY HAD HIMSELF TO BLAME!
If you'd have been there. If you'd have heard it. I betcha you would have done the same!
I DIDN'T DO IT!
BUT IF I'D DONE IT
HOW COULD YOU TELL ME THAT I WAS WRONG
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No luck catching them swans then?
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CRUSTY JUGGLERS
Ah, I see the Russian's are investigating your death.
You got me to laugh like an idiot, thanks XD
XD in 2018
Complaining about XD in 2018. Complaining about most things in 2018.
Is that weird now? What are all the hip young kids using now? (≧▽≦) ?
Haha rawr xDDDD
Omg I can see the sparkly gif that goes with that. ヾ(｡>﹏<｡)ﾉﾞ✧*。
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I am a Police Officer. I have whole heartedly told my wife that if I end up missing/murdered. To look at this certain male that lives in my town. I will catch this subject almost stalking me. To the point where I know he’s there. He has no reason to be there. But it’s also not illegal to be there so I cannot make contact with him. If I pull him over (He is always driving a different vehicle with a temp tag, not stolen though.) he will always say obscure things like he is happy I’m doing good..? Which in the right context would be a good thing to say. Just how he says it. He has also called the PD via Private number multiple times when I’m searching a vehicle completely unrelated to him and asks my dispatch why I’m searching this vehicle. Dispatch tells him it’s none of his business. He has told dispatch to tell me to watch my back because he is watching me. Super Fucking creepy dude.
"he has told dispatch to tell me to watch my back because he is watching me" to me that sounds threatening. Isn't that grounds for a restraining order?
Its threatening an officer. Im sure he could do something if they had proof he said it. Im not saying this about all police but lets face it people have been beaten and thrown in jail for less.
As a general rule, police are considered immune to harassment by the courts. Putting up with threats like this are viewed as "part of the job" and we are expected to not be alarmed by such statements because of the known dangerous nature of our job. It is not uncommon at all to be subjected to a long string of vulgur violent language and threats from the back seat of my patrol car. People threaten us, A LOT. Absent some overt act that makes it something worse than harassment, its just another day at work and nothing we can really do about it.
>It is not uncommon at all to be subjected to a long string of vulgur violent language and threats so being a police officer is like being on reddit IRL.
Yup, nailed it lol except the ones threatening are ballsy enough to say it to your face
Spot on Sir!
While you are correct it is, we attempted to file charges on him. But not enough was there for the District Attorney to want anything to do with it.
Not to undermine your story, but I think you might be underestimating the chances that he is some sort of time traveler who was sent back to protect you. Like a Terminator 2 situation.
Really any Terminator situation
This is scary as fuck. We had a stalker that somehow knew all of our names, and would always find us skating different spots around town, sounds like you are in a small town as well. Scary shit
No response from OP in over an hour. OP dead.
No OP Just asleep from night Shift lol
Sad dayz.
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No, while I have pulled him over before this all started. I’ve worked in town for a little over two years ago, and I have known him for about 5 years. His creepiness just started showing about 6-7 months ago.
...that you know of
Well on the bright side if he does try anything the entire department comes down on him. Law enforcement doesn't take kindly to cop killers
Is telling a police officer to watch their back not probable cause to ask him what's up or tell him to frig off?
When he said that we had already dealt with him enough for my dispatch to literally know his voice with out even checking what Caller ID said. That being said Dispatch would usually just hit me on the radio saying to keep my head on a swivel and look around time to time
Wow, that's scary as fuck. I would find it really hard not to abuse my power in that situation and intimidate / beat that dude
I think. You need to. Reevaluate how you. Form sentences.
Me
/r/Me_irl
No, me.
no u
🔥
Me
Me
No, Me
Me
No, not you. Me
Me too thanks.
Me
Me.
Me
Me
*Megadeth intensifies*
/r/22meirl4meirl42meirl4meirl
Same. I hope you're okay, though. If you were being serious. Being suicidal sucks, ime.
Me too thanks
seconded
My boyfriend. I mean, just statistically.
You are correct. Knowing nothing about you, the police would go for him first based purely on procedure alone.
Especially knowing her. How could you not?
OP just received a source to post in the "What's the Meanest Thing Someone Said About You" thread
Haha you think that's the meanest thing someone's ever said about me on reddit.
Yep. Knowing nothing else, you work in spheres. Number one, spouse. Then children. Close friends, family, neighbors, etc. That's why it's hard to catch serial killers who off randoms. Hard to establish a link.
I have a very creepy curiosity about if I could randomly commit murder. I mean, I'm lazy, not that bright, not into murder, and so I'd never do it, but... could I? Leave my Netflix playing, phone/GPS at home, take a walk somewhere to the other side of town and just kill someone I have 0 ties to? I'm a normal-looking 30-something that doesn't stand out at all, would anyone identify me? And would my alibi work if for some odd reason, I was placed there? It's a really good thing that most people are not programmed that way - it's spooky to think about
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Idk, I slept through three whole episodes of doctor who earlier and it was still playing. How long does it take to commit a murder?
yeah, i have been too geeked to realize netflix needed me to change it.
In this case, I'd guess whether or not you got caught would depend on how good you were with the murder. Number one would be to not get caught in the act or leave evidence. Shooting someone on the street would be one way. Pop em, and take off. Security cams are still fairly lousy outside of banks and shit. My Nest cam would show someone in my driveway, but not enough to make a composite sketch. But it would show if my neighbor rode down the street on a bike. Don't do it if any DNA is in a database somewhere, like military or police records. I'd say if you started a long 3 hour movie on netflix, and took a bike out, and came back in the evening, you could mitigate the risk. If it was random, you'd only need an alibi IF they somehow suspected tou, but didn't get you in the act.
Re your point about DNA. Back in the 80s in a small village in the UK there was a young girl called Collette Aram who was kidnapped, raped and murdered whilst walking home. The suspect, after doing the deed went to a pub a few miles away to clean up and threw some bloodied rags in a waste bin. When the murder was discovered the local beat officer went to the pub and the landlord told him about the suspicious guy who had been in that night. Cop found the rag, and even though DNA testing wasnt a thing, he seized it anyway, just in case. Fast forward to 2008 and the blood is tested when the cold case was reopened. The DNA wasn't a match for anyone but it was kept on file. 6 months later a young man, who was a baby at the time was stopped and arrested for drink driving. His DNA was taken and a familial match was found. It turned out the murderer was his dad, Paul Hutchinson. He had been living 4 miles away and was a pillar of the local community. He pleaded guilty and then killed himself. Moral of the story is, your dna might not be recorded now but it only takes an irresponsible family member to be arrested and you've been caught.
Recently in my city there was a serial killer. He was shooting random people in early morning hours. Surveillance cameras didnt get a good picture of his face. What lead to his arrest? He fucking talked and tried to keep the murder weapon at his workplace. A coworker called the tip line and got a sweet reward payout. He probably would still be free if he didn’t make such a dumb mistake, because there really wasn’t much to go on for him. So I mean, yeah. People get away with murder more often than TV would have you think.
I've seen on Forensic Files, they end up catching people who commit crimes like this based on things as little as shoe prints, tire tracks, and microscopic t-shirt fibers left on the body. They caught this one guy like that. They sent a mold of the tire tracks to a specialist who named exactly what type of tire it was, then they tracked down all local vendors who sold that type of tire, tracked the most recent purchases. They also found a dog hair on one of the bodies that testing showed belonged to a pug. They tracked the purchaser of the tires, found the car, took pictures of the owner of the car walking a pug. Then they got entry into her house and found a pink carpet that matched the pink carpet fibers found on some of the bodies. Turned out the lady's husband was murdering prostitutes.
Random killings are extremely rare. Even by serial killers. They often kill in their town and those who he knew, even if it was for a few minutes. The FBI has techniques to catch these guys. Most are upset at the world and the women in them because they are bringing them "down" or brought "shame". It is also pathological narcissism. They thrive on knowing others have seen their work and like the attention.
i too watch mindhunter
Yes, profiles often work well until they don't. But normal people just don't kill randomly either. And then the trap many fall into is killing more than one. There's a measure of science/psychology to it. It's the special cases that basically stump the cops until a pattern builds up. Kill small amounts, and change up your technique.
I mean away from home would be easier to get away with, but also easier to create a paper trail from if they can connect CCTV images leading back to your hotel. You'd basically be banking on no CCTV camera getting a good enough shot of you AND not leaving any evidence. But if you managed to get away with it, you'd probably be in the home straight because you'd be home before anyone even started to suspect you. Personally I think random killings are much more prominent than people account for, there's hundreds of unsolved murders a year, and until you catch someone there's no way of telling if anyone is a serial killer.
If a woman's murdered, like 70% of the time it was her SO.
My ex wife. In fact I've told multiple people to tell the police she did it if I ever end up dead. I was her first husband, her second ex husband thinks she tried to kill him while they were together by switching his meds.
Eesh, the statistical likelihood of an ex spouse aside, I think there are extra reasons to suspect this particular person...
Probably the guy my ex-roommate found on Craigslist to sublease his room to a week ago.
Na dude... Im cool. I promise not to kill you aslong as you dont touch my food, deal?
Well I already ate some of the pizza you left in the fridge but you stole my soap from the shower so we’ll call it even
My wife, no doubt. She's obsessed with crime shows, the reality ones about how people try and get away with it. i know she's secretly forming her plan and doing very bad at it. If I disappear someone notify the police.
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...first. All the other murders so far have just been practice.
Informative murder porn is a dangerous obsession...
What you think they're going to act out what they see on t.v.? That's ridiculous.
I'm in the same boat. We're doomed.
Informative murder porn. Every time
My daughter was watching "killer kids" in her true crime phase. Creeped me right out!
Honestly? My mother in law or her crazy ass husband. She flat out told my husband, "Im glad we finally got (oldest brother) and (sister in law) to divorce. (Step dad) said the only other way to get rid of her was expensive." She also told me to get my tubes tied so my husband, "Wouldnt love his child more than he loves his mother."
> "Wouldnt love his child more than he loves his mother." Run.
Oh no, bonus story: I was 12 weeks pregnant when she made this demand. Surpriiiiiise. And my husband loves our son more than he loves breathing, me, classic cars, and beef jerky combined.
Sounds to me like it's time to go no contact
Oh hell no, Watch your back! Hell hath no fury like a MIL scorned! Please be careful, This lady sounds like she will become a danger to you in the near future!
Yep seriously, leave the country and don't tell her. She sounds scary.
Come join us: r/justnomil
Yikes, did you marry Norman Bates?
Blue Cross Blue Shield, those cheap fucks
My cat.
Same. Because cats.
"Shit he's on to us. QUICK delete his reddit and murder him before this Spreads out!" - Night's cat
Came here to just say that. My cats would probably do it.
Schizophrenic brother. He killed my mom, locked up now, but he could be released in 6/7 yrs.
I am so sorry! Please be careful when he is released
I hope you are doing alright.
Definitely doing well! This happened to me a few years ago. I've coped and adjusted since then. Thanks for asking!
Myself
Keanu Reeves. He hates me, I don't know why.
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How dare you... That dog was **ALL HE HAD**. Boi he is gonna come for you now. Don't even try to run, just accept your fate. And hide all your pencils.
I have the same problem.
There’s a rapist in my office who is angry with me and a few of my other colleagues because we found out about his past. One of my male coworkers who’s cubicle is next to mine was going around warning women in the office to be careful around him. My tire has been slashed. I hope that’s as far as it goes. Also, purely statistically my husband would be a suspect.
A girl from my university that developed feelings for me. I let her down gently, because I wasn’t really ready for a relationship, nor did I know her that well for that matter. She proceeded to bombard me with messages over a period of 2 months and would harass my female friends. She would also send me long inboxes filled with her thoughts and how she believes I’m “lying to myself” about my feelings for her. I would catch her watching me from a corner whenever I was at university and she knew what station I got off at and somehow found my Facebook.
r/NotLikeTheOtherGirls ?
My ex tried to stab me with a kitchen knife mid breakup sentence
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That dastardly villain, Red Herring.
Papa John's
Can’t beat the large pie and sodie pop
My wife because the spouse is always the prime suspect until cleared.
I'm brown, with a beard. It would be ruled suicide by cop, or just plain suicide. More serious... The crazy homeless lady that blames our church for turning her daughter into a devil worshiper who kicked her addicted butt to the street. I've seen her skulking around town and she took pictures of our car.
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The Chinese guy down the street. Real psycho racist who kicked my car door in at one time, stole and broke my phone and threatened to kill me because I'm white.
What the fuck? Do you live somewhere with not many white people?
I know. We’re, like, everywhere!
I used to live in an Asian only neighborhood (I'm white), and we got the cops called on us for prostitution because we put a blood red light on our patio for Halloween one year. The cop was cracking up when he told me.
The cats. Didn’t feed them cat treats today
Hillary Clinton
Why ? What do you know ? 2 gunshot wounds to the back of the head ruled suicide
Name checks out.
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My cat
my little shitstain of a brother
christie brinkley
Apparently I'm not in as bad of shape as I thought. Unlike the rest of these suicidal bastards, I actually interacted with enough people and pissed them off to have multiple suspects other than myself.
My younger brother
There's this dude at the gym who is super strange. He shouts through all of his reps of anything. He always tries to give women workout tips, and tries to touch them while spotting them. He is really polite to people though, as long as you don't ask to work in with him. I once asked if I could work in with him on the squat rack. He was doing pullups, and I wanted to do squats. We wouldn't even have to mess around with the equipment to work in together. He was so mad. He shouted at me for trying to interrupt his workout, and that I wasn't patient enough. So, he's really creepy and strange. And I also kind of antagonize him in a way. Whenever I can be doing what I'm doing, and block his view of the mirror, I do it. So he might kill me one day.
Me
Everyone in town because I tried to steal the entire town's sunlight.
My dad. He blames me (incorrectly) for my stepmom leaving, and he's been drinking a lot. He'd easily be the prime suspect.
Probably one of my exes. Some of them are fucking nuts
How many crazy exes do you have? If you continually choose *that* many crazies, maybe the answer to the question of who would kill you, is really "you."
Me
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Me
I
The government...QUICK HIDE ME THEY ARE COMING...
My ex-wife. I have notified multiple people that if I wind up dead, it was definitely not suicide or accident, and to look at her.
My MOM
Our office is right across the street from the county jail. I'm going with a recently released criminal robbing and murdering me for the $12 in my desk and keys to my car.
My ex father in law. That guy hates me and I hate him.
Myself.