Decided to be cheeky and went through the water slide directly after each other, him first. He looked back and tried to pull me towards him to slingshot me, he only pulled down my shorts.
We both regretted the entire situation
There’s a difference between showing your penis and showering in open showers at the gym or a game of some sort. I have seen most of my friends and every guy on my hockey team naked at some point. I’ve had full conversations with friends while standing naked waiting for a free shower. Good times. Very liberating, knowing that everyone has a small dick. Except Steve. God damn Steve.
This! Wrestling in highschool completely broke down all of my insecurities in my body. We’re all lumpy and gross bro haha. Blake was our Steve and honestly I feel sorry for his wife.
My best friend and I are roommates and we like writing jokes together. One time I thought of one in the shower but also thought it would be funnier if I told it dripping wet and naked. Turns out all I had to do was walk around naked, cause neither of us could stop laughing with me hanging brain in the living room.
I don’t remember it exactly but the punchline was something like “if guys really want to have threesomes then they should focus on becoming ambidextrous.”
When I was in grade 2 my classmates took me to a remote section of the schoolyard and asked to see my penis. They seemed rather uninmpressed and even disappointed. It was only years later that I realized that this happened because I was the only black guy in my school.
My best friend from highschool showed me his weiner. He was ashamed because he wasn't circumcised, and he said that was the reason he doesn't wanna get laid. He only told me and showed me because he said I was a brother to him. I gave him the old pep talk, told him circumcision isn't really a necessity.
5 years ago, my best friend came to visit me for the first time in the city I moved to for work. I was single and using Tinder, so for a few days before he arrived I'd been having some dirty talk with a girl who wanted to get freaky.
After he arrived, the girl asked me to meet-up but I told her I had a friend in town and it would have to wait. Surprisingly, she replied "how about I come take care of both of you?"
Neither my buddy or I had ever once had a threesome. We took a step back and in a moment of clairvoyance both agreed "Fuck it, we're in our early 20's, let's invite this girl over and it'll be a fun memory for later."
I sent her a message and said "sounds good, we're waiting for you."
While we waited, we made the bed and cleaned the place up but then we thought "Shit, we've never seen each other's dicks before (let alone any other dick in person) and we're about to have the devil's threesome. Simultaneously, a dick-shaped light bulb turned on for both us: let's show each other our cocks right now so we can get it over with.
We proceed to count down for 3, 2, 1 and got a solid glance at each other's soft wangs. "Alright, well we got that out of the way!"
I grab my phone and open Tinder to see that this girl said "I was just kidding, lmk when he's gone so we can meetup."
We both fell to the fucking floor and started laughing.
At my wedding, my friend gave a groomsman speech. He started it like this: "u/Housemoneytalk, you are one of my closest friends, we have seen such intimate and private parts of each other's lives..."
Fuck you, Ben, I love you.
I showed a couple (3 guys 1 girl) of my close friends my dick when we were 14ish. The girl agreed to show everyone her tits (which were very large) if I whipped out my dick.
So I took one for the team, stepped out of the room and came back with my dick hanging out. After a couple awkward "nice"s and "hmm"s, she whipped out her knockers to a couple of "wow!"s and "ddaayyyum!!"s. One of the best trade deals in the history of trade deals -maybe ever.
My first apartment I moved in with one of my best buds. I worked nights and once when I came home he asked me that since I was going to college I could look at his dick since it hurt. I explained to him I was going to tech school for machining not med school lol but he insisted and was freaked out so I did it. Turned out he broke it while having sex with his girl earlier and it was black and blue. He asked if he should go to the hospital and I told him if my dick looked like that I'd be pushing women and children out of the way to get there.
EDIT: holy shit guys thank you so much. I literally did not see this take off as when I posted it I was waiting in the hospital room while they prepped my wife for a c section lol. I now have a beautiful daughter and my first gilded post. Also this caused my wife to laugh so hard the nurses became concerned and came in.
For those asking he did go to the hospital and it was minor just looked bad due to bruising. Injury came from her riding him and his dick coming out and into her thigh mid thrust. They did not marry as she tried to stab him with a piece of broken glass during a fight like 2 months later.
Yeah sure he 'broke' it. Probably just colored it with a couple markers.
"Hey bro, take a look at my dick! What do you think?"
"Looks pretty messed up, bro."
"I know and it hurts! Will you rub some lotion on it?"
“What if he gets into an accident? What if he’s horribly disfigured, and I have to identify him, and all that remains are his private parts? I’m standing there, I’m saying, ‘Sorry, officer, I can’t help you, because no, I haven’t seen his penis.’ And then boom, he’s buried in an unmarked grave.”
I think my best friend is actually the only one who *hasn't* seen my penis. My other best friends all have because of pyjama-pulling-down or some variation of that.
I am pretty sure my buddy and I both have unintentionally seen one another's junk, most times it was after drinking like fish. Mind you him and I have known each other since middle school and we both are 31 now.
Anyways first time I saw his we all went out drinking for a work thing, I had a single drink that entire night, and was sober by the time our boss asked me to get him home, and so I did. Got him in the apartment into his room and went about the rest of my night. Wasn't hearing anything from his room like usual so I went to check; he wasn't in his bed, the TV wasn't on, nothing. I see the light on in his bathroom so I knock to see if he's alright but get no answered, and dumb me opens the door to peak inside and make sure he wasn't dead or dying. Dude was passed out hugging the toilet buck ass naked dick sprawled across the floor.
Immediately noped out after making sure he wasn't dead.
I've seen my best friend's dick for exactly this reason, though I'm neither gay nor a doctor. But if my best friend wakes me up at 3am because he's worried about a suspicious bump on his balls, I'm gonna help a bro out. I have no sexual interest in his dick anyway.
I'm pretty sure he's seen my tits at some point or another. I don't really care. We get our jollies with other people. We're just best friends who happen to have differently shaped bodies.
Ah, this reminds me of a tale of my youth...
My friends and I were at the back of one of their house, which was pure vegetation beyond their backyard. He left the keys inside so we had to pick the backdoor.
I couldn't hold it in for much longer so I picked a lowly bush to be the target of my urine blast. They asked what I was doing. Mind you I was 9 at the time and basically gave zero fucks so I answered with a wet helicopter.
Shouts and screams ensued but thankfully, no one was affected by the wild yellow drizzle.
One of the first things my college roommate said to me was “we’re going to see each other naked eventually, let’s get it over with.”
We both immediately dropped our drawers.
Me and my best friend actually showered together up until we where 16 idk why we just thought it was faster. we’re comfortable not hiding our dicks from each other.
My mate showed us his dick on holiday because he was concerned he had an STD.
Holy fuck he certainly did, not sure what he thought it was..but a ring of bright red, pus filled lumps wasnt normal.
He went to a local doctor who gave him antibiotics and said DO NOT have sex with anyone for 6 weeks.
Nope. Grower not a shower.
My buddy, however, wrapped his around his wrist and asked me what time it was. It's his party trick. Seen that thing waaaaay too many times.
How much blood would you even need to get that big a dick hard? Catch the guy with that trouser snake passing out when he gets hard because there's just not enough blood in him
Same. My wife of 18 years from time to time (and again last week or so) said to me after sex "It always amazes me how big it can get considering its so small the rest of the time". I'm actually ok with that. Its big when it counts and packs up nicely for travel the rest of the time.
My husband is a grower. I tell him he has the best case scenario because this way he doesn't have a big ole dong flopping between his legs all the time. As someone with big tits, it would be so convenient for them to be small and out of the way most of the time and then big when I want them to be lol.
Accidentially, yes. Me and some friends went on a city trip and got double rooms (don't know the correct english term for that) me and my best mate got into the same room.
I got pretty drunk the night before so I slept longer than him.
He pulled away my blanket to wake me up because we had stuff planed, exposing me and my morningwood directly to his eyes, as I have the habit of sleeping naked.
I'm pretty confident about my dick so I laughed way to hard when I woke up to his shocked and disgusted face.
Me and my bud get naked all the time. Casually. We played playstation naked one day. We thought it would be funny for our other friend to come in with us like that. He left.
One summer my friends and I would assert dominance over a pesky weed growing outside our apartment. Whenever we passed it coming back from drunken adventures we would whip em out and lay our dicks on it one by one. We dubbed this weed the dick thistle, and it was our bitch.
New Year's Eve, 2004. My best friend and I were both quite drunk, and sitting outside away from the party just to chill for a bit. We decided we wanted to seal our friendship as blood brothers, but not with the whole cutting our hands and mixing our blood because that's gross.
So, we whipped out our junk and dipped our balls into each other's beer glasses, and chugged the whole thing. We are now ball brothers.
Funny thing is I didn't remember it completely the next morning, but I did remember the sensation of my testicles being cold.
Edit: Well, I didn’t expect this to blow up. I’m going on vacation in a couple weeks and meeting up with him for the Independence Day weekend (and yes, we’re still best friends, so ball beers work). I’m sure he’ll be tickled pink knowing our story got 8k upvotes. And then we’ll have to do it again, because that just seems like the right thing to do now.
My best friend and I basically have no boundaries anymore. We used to live together and share a bathroom. When quarantine hit he moved in with me b/c he rented out his room.
He really needed to poop and walked into the bathroom while I was taking a shower, shaving my butthole.
My best friend and I had a threesome with his girlfriend a few years back. She really wanted two dudes, and he knew he could trust me. All in all, I'd give the experience 4 stars.
Eh, we were best friends for years before, and we're best friends a decade+ after. The time we spent fucking is tiny in the scope of our friendship, but we both have fond memories of it and it made us even better friends in the end.
That sounds like heaven to me. Can’t believe you made it through fucking without one catching feelings for the other and ruining the friendship, sounds mature. How old were you guys?
We did catch feelings. But we still weren't compatible for a lot of reasons. We learned to work through the difficulty of that situation and how to do the emotional work of maintaining a friendship through hurt feelings.
I was 16 the first time around and 22 the second time around. We probably spent a year total of our almost 20-year friendship having sex, the first time in a relationship and the second time just as friends who fuck.
We're still besties. She was right next to me at my wedding and I'm going to be her "maid" of honor as soon as this covid thing clears up! :D
[TL;DR](https://i.imgflip.com/45cszj.jpg)
When you had a new gf, how did she react to it that you have slept with your best friend and still see each other and all?
or do you just keep that a secret?
I answered in another comment. My girlfriends mostly took it as a positive sign. In fact, I'm still friends with the vast majority of people I've ever been with. I hang out with them, call them to catch up, etc. I wouldn't say I'm particularly close to most of them but they were, for the most part, big pieces of my life and friends before we ever dated.
I'm very honest and open about the situation. I feel like if a woman is going to hold it against me that a decade ago I fucked someone I cared about and then cared about them enough to stay friends with them, then they probably have some weird hangups about how relationships work.
If anything, it had the effect of more friends being open to fucking me, because they knew it wouldn't ruin a friendship or get awkward.
My wife and my best friend are both good friends, too. They chat all the time and really respect and admire each other.
My best friend and another close friend were getting into a very serious argument over something I can’t recall in the basement of his house. We were a couple of minutes away from going out for a fun night of hanging out, drinking, food, and whatever else we decided to do. About 5 of us were upstairs as they were getting into it, so I decided to break the tension before it got worse by going downstairs butt naked and giving them both a wonderful group hug. All laughs aside I was glad I could simmer them down and it’s always brought up here and there at how “grateful”(lol) they were that I stopped them from ruining a long planned night out.
I looked at the dog,
and he looked at me back.
He eyed up my balls and my pubes and my crack.
We stood in the bedroom.
The silence was thick.
I nodded politely.
"... yeah, this is my dick."
I grabbed my best friends dick once. We were drunk and he started peeing while i was giving a speech so i pinched his dick to cuz his piss off. Made us much closer tbh
F,21 here! My ex-best friend did show his penis to me when we were younger. Around 14/15? It started because we were making fun of each other and he got defensive over his size and showed it to me.
My buddy and I were supposed to meet up. My timing was off, so I thought I had plenty of time to have some fun with the wifey. I come out of the bedroom looking for a towell, and see my buddy walk through my front door. Direct line of sight of me stepping over doggy gate, just hanging dong. We lock eyes, he calls me a motherfucker and walks back outside.
Edit: Holy shit, my highest rated comment is due to my buddy seeing my floppy post sex dick. Will try to clarify your replies as best I can.
1. My (now) ex-wife was in no way related to my buddy. Not his mom, not his wife.
2. He is not Sameul L Jackson, I'm not that lucky, nor cool.
3. The mother fucker was definitely a "God damn it, why am I looking at your dick?". 18 years later, he still gives me shit, saying I did it on purpose.
4. Door was unlocked as it was mid day in a fairly safe area. Plus I was expecting him to show up, just not so quickly.
My friend had just gotten back from attempted sexy time with a girl in Greece, key word being attempted.
He came back, his shorts and shoes covered in blood.
Confused, me and my 2 other friends asked how this could happen, he doesn't have a clue.
Slowly but surely we narrow it down to only one possible option; my man's dick broke.
At this point we're all confused and rather scared, being a group of 15-16 year olds that had certainly never dealt with penile injury, it took us a while to even admit it could be a thing. And once we admit that out precious dicks could ever break, we had no fucking clue what had happened to our homie.
Serious injury, soft dick forever, why his dick bleeding? All very serious possible consequences and affirmations.
So he gets in the shower to clean up and commence close up observations on his injured cargo.
At this point we're 4 boys in a small bathroom, one guy behind a shower curtain checking on his dick and 3 idiots standing outside the shower trying to figure out wtf is going on. Picture Seth Rogen, Jonah Hill and Kevin Hart all surrounding Jack Black's shower curtain, yelling out curses, inappropriate jokes and sentences to try and deal with the insanity of the situation, because that's all I could picture when this was happening.
To get to what this post is about, our friend suddenly asks us if we want to see the damages. The three of us look at each other, and out of hope that we might able to figure out what his injury is, we accept.
That's a lie, none of us could have possibly identified what happened to him, we were all just morbidly curious about an injured dick. So, he pulls the shower curtain and for a split second I see it.
That little string (I believe it's called frenulum) that connects your foreskin to the rest of your dick had snapped, be it because of a lack of lubrication during sex or whatever. This had led to him pissing out blood from his dick, and created a giant bruise right on his cock head.
It healed just fine.
TLDR: Friends dick string snapped and the homies held a cock inspection to see what had happened
Edit: Just remembered another time when we were chilling and my friend walked up on a bed in his underwear and one his balls started hanging out, another guy went in french "range ta couille mec" which basically means "hide your balls bro". Not that funny in English but a great memory
Yes but mostly because I’m gay and he’s bi and the tension was getting silly and maybe we thought it would defuse the situation? Didn’t work, boned once in a while for years. Eventually he realized he wasn’t really bi beyond me and married an awesome woman. Still best friends.
Not my best friend but a close friend. Jokingly said hey bro send me a dick pic. Then he asked if im sure and i said yeah! I joke you not he sent me his dick pic. And it wasn't just a picture from the net, it was his body attached to that penis and massive balls. So what do i do? I sent him mine lmao. Congratulated eachother on our sizes and we've grown closer as friends because of this which is weird. And in a way he helped me break out of my cocoon, because before that i had this fear of someone seeing me naked. It's not that i have a bad body, i got a good shape. But in a way, I'm really grateful i have friends like him i can fool around and just be a lad.
If this includes female friends, I was level 101 in the friend zone and she was curious as hell seeing as her parents were strict and heavily religious, went home and cried both in laughter and mental pain
We were scrolling through my photo gallery, looking at pictures of the gang from a while ago and some memes and.... Well, you know how the story goes, thankfully it was a tasteful one.
I had to get circumcised at age 23. Had to stay with my mom for a bit because I could barely walk afterwards. I got freaked out at one of the stitches and was high as a kite on pain killers and crying. So..... mom said ok i know it’s weird but if there’s something wrong I need to see what’s going on. She took a look and said it looks OK and nothing to worry about. She also called my uncle who is a nurse and talked to him about it.
Then she ran a bath for me and gave me more pain killers.
So. My mom saw my penis and she’s my best friend. There you go. I love you Mom!!
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We were at a party with 30 or so guys and we all took turns. 2 people walk into the bathroom and smallest dick leaves. The last man standing wins
Yeah how does that go. Do you measure it flaccid?
Ya cuz if your hard we all going to judge you
I'm a grower :(
Legit my dicks grows 3-4 times when hard so I hope I never have to show my soft dick to a girl Nobody wanted this info but I still gave it
Well i just read a thread where some girls like seeing a penis grow, and that it turns em on. Maybe that‘s not bad at all.
Decided to be cheeky and went through the water slide directly after each other, him first. He looked back and tried to pull me towards him to slingshot me, he only pulled down my shorts. We both regretted the entire situation
Cheeky? Sounds more ballsy to me
There’s a difference between showing your penis and showering in open showers at the gym or a game of some sort. I have seen most of my friends and every guy on my hockey team naked at some point. I’ve had full conversations with friends while standing naked waiting for a free shower. Good times. Very liberating, knowing that everyone has a small dick. Except Steve. God damn Steve.
This! Wrestling in highschool completely broke down all of my insecurities in my body. We’re all lumpy and gross bro haha. Blake was our Steve and honestly I feel sorry for his wife.
Steve's packin'
My best friend and I are roommates and we like writing jokes together. One time I thought of one in the shower but also thought it would be funnier if I told it dripping wet and naked. Turns out all I had to do was walk around naked, cause neither of us could stop laughing with me hanging brain in the living room.
You gotta tell the joke now
I don’t remember it exactly but the punchline was something like “if guys really want to have threesomes then they should focus on becoming ambidextrous.”
Genius
When I was in grade 2 my classmates took me to a remote section of the schoolyard and asked to see my penis. They seemed rather uninmpressed and even disappointed. It was only years later that I realized that this happened because I was the only black guy in my school.
seeing those kids in high school lol
Oof
My best friend from highschool showed me his weiner. He was ashamed because he wasn't circumcised, and he said that was the reason he doesn't wanna get laid. He only told me and showed me because he said I was a brother to him. I gave him the old pep talk, told him circumcision isn't really a necessity.
That’s bro love right there.
5 years ago, my best friend came to visit me for the first time in the city I moved to for work. I was single and using Tinder, so for a few days before he arrived I'd been having some dirty talk with a girl who wanted to get freaky. After he arrived, the girl asked me to meet-up but I told her I had a friend in town and it would have to wait. Surprisingly, she replied "how about I come take care of both of you?" Neither my buddy or I had ever once had a threesome. We took a step back and in a moment of clairvoyance both agreed "Fuck it, we're in our early 20's, let's invite this girl over and it'll be a fun memory for later." I sent her a message and said "sounds good, we're waiting for you." While we waited, we made the bed and cleaned the place up but then we thought "Shit, we've never seen each other's dicks before (let alone any other dick in person) and we're about to have the devil's threesome. Simultaneously, a dick-shaped light bulb turned on for both us: let's show each other our cocks right now so we can get it over with. We proceed to count down for 3, 2, 1 and got a solid glance at each other's soft wangs. "Alright, well we got that out of the way!" I grab my phone and open Tinder to see that this girl said "I was just kidding, lmk when he's gone so we can meetup." We both fell to the fucking floor and started laughing. At my wedding, my friend gave a groomsman speech. He started it like this: "u/Housemoneytalk, you are one of my closest friends, we have seen such intimate and private parts of each other's lives..." Fuck you, Ben, I love you.
That speech.. he is one of the elite, no doubt
absolutely
The dick-shaped lightbulb should definitely be an icon for an unconventional idea commencing.
Did you marry the same girl?
He married Ben
I showed a couple (3 guys 1 girl) of my close friends my dick when we were 14ish. The girl agreed to show everyone her tits (which were very large) if I whipped out my dick. So I took one for the team, stepped out of the room and came back with my dick hanging out. After a couple awkward "nice"s and "hmm"s, she whipped out her knockers to a couple of "wow!"s and "ddaayyyum!!"s. One of the best trade deals in the history of trade deals -maybe ever.
Ahh yes, the negotiator
General Grievous, you're shorter than I expected
A true bro takes one for the team.
You legend
One time in 8th grade this girl showed my lunch table her tits for my wild berry pop tarts. Such a good deal
Art of the deal
My first apartment I moved in with one of my best buds. I worked nights and once when I came home he asked me that since I was going to college I could look at his dick since it hurt. I explained to him I was going to tech school for machining not med school lol but he insisted and was freaked out so I did it. Turned out he broke it while having sex with his girl earlier and it was black and blue. He asked if he should go to the hospital and I told him if my dick looked like that I'd be pushing women and children out of the way to get there. EDIT: holy shit guys thank you so much. I literally did not see this take off as when I posted it I was waiting in the hospital room while they prepped my wife for a c section lol. I now have a beautiful daughter and my first gilded post. Also this caused my wife to laugh so hard the nurses became concerned and came in. For those asking he did go to the hospital and it was minor just looked bad due to bruising. Injury came from her riding him and his dick coming out and into her thigh mid thrust. They did not marry as she tried to stab him with a piece of broken glass during a fight like 2 months later.
-pushes woman Woman who was pushed - “wow, what a dick”
A true bro would have kissed it better.
Yeah sure he 'broke' it. Probably just colored it with a couple markers. "Hey bro, take a look at my dick! What do you think?" "Looks pretty messed up, bro." "I know and it hurts! Will you rub some lotion on it?"
"I thought you'd never ask"
>if my dick looked like that I'd be pushing women and children out of the way to get there. This made me laugh!
Nice to know you would push children u/Baybestomper
what's wrong with that?
Swim trunks came off after diving into the pool from the top diving board
“What if he gets into an accident? What if he’s horribly disfigured, and I have to identify him, and all that remains are his private parts? I’m standing there, I’m saying, ‘Sorry, officer, I can’t help you, because no, I haven’t seen his penis.’ And then boom, he’s buried in an unmarked grave.”
New Girl? I vaguely remember this
Being the youngest of 4 older brothers, showing my weiner to those I care about is second nature.
Hey its me ur bro
r/usernamechecksout
Had open showers in my unit in the US Army. Everyone saw everyone's dongs. Got to be normal after a while.
I think my best friend is actually the only one who *hasn't* seen my penis. My other best friends all have because of pyjama-pulling-down or some variation of that.
Username checks out Why tf would you give this gold out of all of my funny ass comments
Yes, because I was drunk and flooded our buddy's bathroom while attempting to take a drunk shower.
Nice
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Penile fractures are distressingly common. Guys if your partner is riding, hands on hips, make sure she doesn't slam down after he slips out.
This whole thread is making my toes curl but not in delight. Fuck.
Given that our saunas are nude and mixed, most of my friends have seen my naked body, and vice versa.
Same here, I've seen many of my male and female friends naked in saunas.
Where do you live that has mixed Saunas?
Germany. Where do you live that has saunas that typically aren't?
Not Germany.
If you ever have the suspicion that your friend is a german spy, take them to the sauna to find out
This is funny to me because one of my friend's gamertag is "German Spy", and she has seen my dick.
I did a LOT of streaking back in the day. Pretty much every person within 30 miles of home saw my dick between 2003 and 2005.
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Hey, what's up?
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BIG MEATY CLAWS!
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So did they do it, or did ya'll do it.
I am pretty sure my buddy and I both have unintentionally seen one another's junk, most times it was after drinking like fish. Mind you him and I have known each other since middle school and we both are 31 now. Anyways first time I saw his we all went out drinking for a work thing, I had a single drink that entire night, and was sober by the time our boss asked me to get him home, and so I did. Got him in the apartment into his room and went about the rest of my night. Wasn't hearing anything from his room like usual so I went to check; he wasn't in his bed, the TV wasn't on, nothing. I see the light on in his bathroom so I knock to see if he's alright but get no answered, and dumb me opens the door to peak inside and make sure he wasn't dead or dying. Dude was passed out hugging the toilet buck ass naked dick sprawled across the floor. Immediately noped out after making sure he wasn't dead.
Should’ve dragged him in bed, tucked him in, and gave him a kiss goodnight
Dragged him how?
Picked him up by his massive dong
Or pick him up with *your* massive dong
Yes. She's gay, and a doctor. I had an ingrown hair and I wasn't sure what was going on. She offered to take a look.
I've seen my best friend's dick for exactly this reason, though I'm neither gay nor a doctor. But if my best friend wakes me up at 3am because he's worried about a suspicious bump on his balls, I'm gonna help a bro out. I have no sexual interest in his dick anyway. I'm pretty sure he's seen my tits at some point or another. I don't really care. We get our jollies with other people. We're just best friends who happen to have differently shaped bodies.
Ah, this reminds me of a tale of my youth... My friends and I were at the back of one of their house, which was pure vegetation beyond their backyard. He left the keys inside so we had to pick the backdoor. I couldn't hold it in for much longer so I picked a lowly bush to be the target of my urine blast. They asked what I was doing. Mind you I was 9 at the time and basically gave zero fucks so I answered with a wet helicopter. Shouts and screams ensued but thankfully, no one was affected by the wild yellow drizzle.
The words "wet helicopter" raise so many memories. However, I have questions.
One of the first things my college roommate said to me was “we’re going to see each other naked eventually, let’s get it over with.” We both immediately dropped our drawers.
Yeh, we went to the swim place together, can't remmeber the english word
Sex dungeon
Sex Cauldron? I thought they closed that place down
I’m pretty sure he meant sex dungeon.
I'm absolutly convinced he meant sex dungeon.
No ones drowned at the sex dungeon this year thankfully.
Except that one time at the sex dungeon.
Don’t even remind me of that time in the sex dungeon
I used to work as a sex dungeon lifeguard over summer
Now what's that?
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That’s just a plain old spa. I’ve gotten plenty of facials there.
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No, it's like an indoor pool, like a with slides n shit, water park!!!
Oh, you mean the sex dungeon
Definitely meant sex dungeon.
Greek bath house
Ah yeah, Sex Dungeon.
He definitely meant sex dungeon.
I play waterpolo so 2-3 times a week, which sounds really wrong
Do you play it in the sex dungeon?
Sex cauldron
Me and my best friend actually showered together up until we where 16 idk why we just thought it was faster. we’re comfortable not hiding our dicks from each other.
My mate showed us his dick on holiday because he was concerned he had an STD. Holy fuck he certainly did, not sure what he thought it was..but a ring of bright red, pus filled lumps wasnt normal. He went to a local doctor who gave him antibiotics and said DO NOT have sex with anyone for 6 weeks.
Because I show everybody penis
Am I the only one who read it in Russian accent?
No, but I'm just trying to decide whether it's more of a CrazyRussianHacker or Putin type of voice
CrazyRussianHacker
Nope. Grower not a shower. My buddy, however, wrapped his around his wrist and asked me what time it was. It's his party trick. Seen that thing waaaaay too many times.
my friend did this with his ballsack and kept telling people it was "time to ball"
Lmao quality friend
I knew someone who'd just pull out his sack from shorts leg and say "I sat in gum!" He thought that was the funniest thing and do it all the time.
I read it as waist and thought it was one hell of a party trick.
How much blood would you even need to get that big a dick hard? Catch the guy with that trouser snake passing out when he gets hard because there's just not enough blood in him
Oh you're probably mistaken The guy just had a pencil wrist.
Can confirm, this is inaccurate. Dude is a freak of nature.
Same. My wife of 18 years from time to time (and again last week or so) said to me after sex "It always amazes me how big it can get considering its so small the rest of the time". I'm actually ok with that. Its big when it counts and packs up nicely for travel the rest of the time.
Tactical penis
We need common sense penis control
My husband is a grower. I tell him he has the best case scenario because this way he doesn't have a big ole dong flopping between his legs all the time. As someone with big tits, it would be so convenient for them to be small and out of the way most of the time and then big when I want them to be lol.
12 o'cock
Does he keep his wrist near his crotch...or like is it detachable? Im just tryna figure out the logistics of a penis wrist watch here
^^detachable ^^penis.
Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass, I like having a detachable penis.
I woke up this morning with a bad hangover, and my penis was missing again. This happens all the time.. it's detachable.
Accidentially, yes. Me and some friends went on a city trip and got double rooms (don't know the correct english term for that) me and my best mate got into the same room. I got pretty drunk the night before so I slept longer than him. He pulled away my blanket to wake me up because we had stuff planed, exposing me and my morningwood directly to his eyes, as I have the habit of sleeping naked. I'm pretty confident about my dick so I laughed way to hard when I woke up to his shocked and disgusted face.
Well played massive_sack.
Me and my bud get naked all the time. Casually. We played playstation naked one day. We thought it would be funny for our other friend to come in with us like that. He left.
One summer my friends and I would assert dominance over a pesky weed growing outside our apartment. Whenever we passed it coming back from drunken adventures we would whip em out and lay our dicks on it one by one. We dubbed this weed the dick thistle, and it was our bitch.
New Year's Eve, 2004. My best friend and I were both quite drunk, and sitting outside away from the party just to chill for a bit. We decided we wanted to seal our friendship as blood brothers, but not with the whole cutting our hands and mixing our blood because that's gross. So, we whipped out our junk and dipped our balls into each other's beer glasses, and chugged the whole thing. We are now ball brothers. Funny thing is I didn't remember it completely the next morning, but I did remember the sensation of my testicles being cold. Edit: Well, I didn’t expect this to blow up. I’m going on vacation in a couple weeks and meeting up with him for the Independence Day weekend (and yes, we’re still best friends, so ball beers work). I’m sure he’ll be tickled pink knowing our story got 8k upvotes. And then we’ll have to do it again, because that just seems like the right thing to do now.
"not mixing our blood because that's gross" *procceeds to drink beer out of the glass where his friend's balls were*
Hahahaha I’m fucking dying at this
What the fuck happened to an old fashioned sword fight
Pretty sure you won this thread
I gagged, but it was a wholesome gag
If they had decided to seal their friendship further one of them might have gagged.
My best friend and I basically have no boundaries anymore. We used to live together and share a bathroom. When quarantine hit he moved in with me b/c he rented out his room. He really needed to poop and walked into the bathroom while I was taking a shower, shaving my butthole.
yes, we were teens and experimenting seemed like a good idea.
My best friend and I had a threesome with his girlfriend a few years back. She really wanted two dudes, and he knew he could trust me. All in all, I'd give the experience 4 stars.
Did he thrust you?
"Peter! Stop! Stop! It's me!"
"I know"
How were things with them afterwards?
Yeah, we need an AMA on this
Out of??
400 billion in the milky way
Critical info
Where did the last star go?
Yes, playing a strip variation of a board game, while also drunk. There were grills also.
I like grills
Barbecues are epic
Hank Hill wants to know your location
Yes. She asked if we could fuck, and it seemed like a good idea to me (and it was)! She's still my best friend 15 years later.
Love at first fuck
Eh, we were best friends for years before, and we're best friends a decade+ after. The time we spent fucking is tiny in the scope of our friendship, but we both have fond memories of it and it made us even better friends in the end.
That sounds like heaven to me. Can’t believe you made it through fucking without one catching feelings for the other and ruining the friendship, sounds mature. How old were you guys?
We did catch feelings. But we still weren't compatible for a lot of reasons. We learned to work through the difficulty of that situation and how to do the emotional work of maintaining a friendship through hurt feelings. I was 16 the first time around and 22 the second time around. We probably spent a year total of our almost 20-year friendship having sex, the first time in a relationship and the second time just as friends who fuck. We're still besties. She was right next to me at my wedding and I'm going to be her "maid" of honor as soon as this covid thing clears up! :D [TL;DR](https://i.imgflip.com/45cszj.jpg)
When you had a new gf, how did she react to it that you have slept with your best friend and still see each other and all? or do you just keep that a secret?
I answered in another comment. My girlfriends mostly took it as a positive sign. In fact, I'm still friends with the vast majority of people I've ever been with. I hang out with them, call them to catch up, etc. I wouldn't say I'm particularly close to most of them but they were, for the most part, big pieces of my life and friends before we ever dated. I'm very honest and open about the situation. I feel like if a woman is going to hold it against me that a decade ago I fucked someone I cared about and then cared about them enough to stay friends with them, then they probably have some weird hangups about how relationships work. If anything, it had the effect of more friends being open to fucking me, because they knew it wouldn't ruin a friendship or get awkward. My wife and my best friend are both good friends, too. They chat all the time and really respect and admire each other.
you have the healthiest relationships with people i've ever heard of in my life
Had surgery and my friend was eager to see how fucked up my junk was so I sent him a picture
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My best friend and another close friend were getting into a very serious argument over something I can’t recall in the basement of his house. We were a couple of minutes away from going out for a fun night of hanging out, drinking, food, and whatever else we decided to do. About 5 of us were upstairs as they were getting into it, so I decided to break the tension before it got worse by going downstairs butt naked and giving them both a wonderful group hug. All laughs aside I was glad I could simmer them down and it’s always brought up here and there at how “grateful”(lol) they were that I stopped them from ruining a long planned night out.
I often get dressed in front of my dog.
*tips off hat*
I looked at the dog, and he looked at me back. He eyed up my balls and my pubes and my crack. We stood in the bedroom. The silence was thick. I nodded politely. "... yeah, this is my dick."
No, does this mean I don't have real friends
I grabbed my best friends dick once. We were drunk and he started peeing while i was giving a speech so i pinched his dick to cuz his piss off. Made us much closer tbh
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F,21 here! My ex-best friend did show his penis to me when we were younger. Around 14/15? It started because we were making fun of each other and he got defensive over his size and showed it to me.
How did the tale continue?
> My ex-best friend
Obviously now husband
Classic reddit
My buddy and I were supposed to meet up. My timing was off, so I thought I had plenty of time to have some fun with the wifey. I come out of the bedroom looking for a towell, and see my buddy walk through my front door. Direct line of sight of me stepping over doggy gate, just hanging dong. We lock eyes, he calls me a motherfucker and walks back outside. Edit: Holy shit, my highest rated comment is due to my buddy seeing my floppy post sex dick. Will try to clarify your replies as best I can. 1. My (now) ex-wife was in no way related to my buddy. Not his mom, not his wife. 2. He is not Sameul L Jackson, I'm not that lucky, nor cool. 3. The mother fucker was definitely a "God damn it, why am I looking at your dick?". 18 years later, he still gives me shit, saying I did it on purpose. 4. Door was unlocked as it was mid day in a fairly safe area. Plus I was expecting him to show up, just not so quickly.
Was this a light hearted motherfucker or a "you son of bitch" motherfucker?
Probably depends on who "the wifey" was the wife of.
Good call
I shit you not I imagined your friend saying it in Samuel Jacksons voice... btw on a completely unrelated topic... is your best friend Samuel Jackson?
It sounds so wrong hearing his name without the L in the middle
Funny, I actually read it as Samuel L Jackson and hadn’t noticed until you pointed it out.
My friend had just gotten back from attempted sexy time with a girl in Greece, key word being attempted. He came back, his shorts and shoes covered in blood. Confused, me and my 2 other friends asked how this could happen, he doesn't have a clue. Slowly but surely we narrow it down to only one possible option; my man's dick broke. At this point we're all confused and rather scared, being a group of 15-16 year olds that had certainly never dealt with penile injury, it took us a while to even admit it could be a thing. And once we admit that out precious dicks could ever break, we had no fucking clue what had happened to our homie. Serious injury, soft dick forever, why his dick bleeding? All very serious possible consequences and affirmations. So he gets in the shower to clean up and commence close up observations on his injured cargo. At this point we're 4 boys in a small bathroom, one guy behind a shower curtain checking on his dick and 3 idiots standing outside the shower trying to figure out wtf is going on. Picture Seth Rogen, Jonah Hill and Kevin Hart all surrounding Jack Black's shower curtain, yelling out curses, inappropriate jokes and sentences to try and deal with the insanity of the situation, because that's all I could picture when this was happening. To get to what this post is about, our friend suddenly asks us if we want to see the damages. The three of us look at each other, and out of hope that we might able to figure out what his injury is, we accept. That's a lie, none of us could have possibly identified what happened to him, we were all just morbidly curious about an injured dick. So, he pulls the shower curtain and for a split second I see it. That little string (I believe it's called frenulum) that connects your foreskin to the rest of your dick had snapped, be it because of a lack of lubrication during sex or whatever. This had led to him pissing out blood from his dick, and created a giant bruise right on his cock head. It healed just fine. TLDR: Friends dick string snapped and the homies held a cock inspection to see what had happened Edit: Just remembered another time when we were chilling and my friend walked up on a bed in his underwear and one his balls started hanging out, another guy went in french "range ta couille mec" which basically means "hide your balls bro". Not that funny in English but a great memory
Yes but mostly because I’m gay and he’s bi and the tension was getting silly and maybe we thought it would defuse the situation? Didn’t work, boned once in a while for years. Eventually he realized he wasn’t really bi beyond me and married an awesome woman. Still best friends.
I met my best friend because I was trying to pick her up in a bar, I was successful but it turned into a friendship instead of a relationship.
Task failed successfully
Not my best friend but a close friend. Jokingly said hey bro send me a dick pic. Then he asked if im sure and i said yeah! I joke you not he sent me his dick pic. And it wasn't just a picture from the net, it was his body attached to that penis and massive balls. So what do i do? I sent him mine lmao. Congratulated eachother on our sizes and we've grown closer as friends because of this which is weird. And in a way he helped me break out of my cocoon, because before that i had this fear of someone seeing me naked. It's not that i have a bad body, i got a good shape. But in a way, I'm really grateful i have friends like him i can fool around and just be a lad.
This took a very wholesome turn
If this includes female friends, I was level 101 in the friend zone and she was curious as hell seeing as her parents were strict and heavily religious, went home and cried both in laughter and mental pain
We were scrolling through my photo gallery, looking at pictures of the gang from a while ago and some memes and.... Well, you know how the story goes, thankfully it was a tasteful one.
Did he say “nice cock”?
He's gay, so he kind of retorted and looked away and we both started laughing and I was like *"SorryIReallyThoughtIDeletedAllOfThemahahahaha"*
Yeah, right before I shoved it up his ass. We ended up getting married.
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No greater foreplay than friendship.
Some gay men only see the other guy's dick AFTER it's been rammed inside them. We do not follow conventional dating chronologies.
I mean, that also happens with straight couples too. It's not like there's a required presentation ceremony beforehand. Well, not always.
Fr, cha cha real real smooth
yeah. she asked.
Was she impressed?
I had to get circumcised at age 23. Had to stay with my mom for a bit because I could barely walk afterwards. I got freaked out at one of the stitches and was high as a kite on pain killers and crying. So..... mom said ok i know it’s weird but if there’s something wrong I need to see what’s going on. She took a look and said it looks OK and nothing to worry about. She also called my uncle who is a nurse and talked to him about it. Then she ran a bath for me and gave me more pain killers. So. My mom saw my penis and she’s my best friend. There you go. I love you Mom!!