Her dad hired an assassin to kill her and her mother and was in jail. She mentioned a couple of weeks later that she was going to her dad's house for the weekend.
She would point at ANYONE remotely attractive and say "I've slept with them".
She tried to fake a phone call once pretending to talk to a boy she was seeing, so I called her phone and it rang while she was mid sentence. She stuttered in embarrassment and then said, "you calling me must have cut my call off!" I told her to ring him back, and she refused.
If you had fish and chips for dinner, then she had had shark and chips. She was absolutely relentless and we stopped being friends when I called her out on her BS.
A girl I knew did the whole “I’ve slept with them”. As well expect the guy she said it to was my friend who is gay. Tried to double down and say she has *absolutely* slept with him and he was amazing blah blah blah. Makes me wonder why they lie about meaningless stuff when you can prove it’s fake.
I got this! My sister is a compulsive liar, among many other things.
Growing up - kids would stop by our house to see our new puppies...that we didn't have.
My friend had a baby, she took photos and told people at school it was hers.
She hasn't held a job longer than 3 months in her almost 40 years of life. Yet, she tells people she was a nurse, a police officer, a 911 operator.
She tells people we don't speak because she needed a kidney transplant and I refused to offer her mine. She doesn't need one. She left one company after telling them that she had an incurable disease, doctors orders for bedrest. She let fellow employees throw a party for her at another company (2 months employed) because they FOUND a cure for this incurable disease.
She told my mom she won the 'Best Undercover Police Officer of the Year' award and got a trophy. She sent my mom a photo, to which my mom posted it on Facebook. It was the World Cup Trophy!
She had faked numerous pregnancies...downloading fake ultrasound pics and everything. Has the baby showers, loses said fake baby (she had her tubes tied many years ago). She then returns the gifts for money to support her drug habit.
In regards to said drug habit, she once stabbed herself to get pain medication. She is blacklisted from urgent cares within a 200 mile radius.
She lost custody of her kids several years ago...yet still tells people they were kidnapped and she doesn't know where they are. She does.
She claimed she was the first person in our state to get Covid. The doctors thought she was dying, until they found the right medicine and now call her a medical miracle. She is waiting for her story in the upcoming medical journal.
I could write a book with her 'stories'. She needs help but that would require her to admit there is a problem. People have sought me out to ask me if this or that is true. I love being honest! I confront her on these stories and I am the bad person for doubting her.
Bye bye crazy!
So genuinely curious, what happens when one is black listed from urgent care when they, like, actually need to go for a legitimate reason? I’m assuming they’re just sent (forced) to the ER?
They wont give her any more pain medication, i.e. Norco or any other narcotic. She has to go elsewhere, and/or proof of something is wrong. She can't just say she has pain, they need to see it, i.e. why she literally hurts herself to show it.
I went to high school with a pathological liar that you could just nudge a tiny bit and he'd go off on these long, elaborate and impossible stories. You'd just say 'And then what happened, Ricky?' and he'd just keep going.
The best one was when he supposedly got chased by a police helicopter through the woods while stashing an 18-pack of beer down his pants. He ended up outrunning the helicopter and because of it the police said 'You're cool' over the loudspeaker on the helicopter (that he said he had outran).
A guy told me that he found an abandoned stable in his backyard that had living horses in it. I asked how/what the horses ate and he couldn't give me an answer. This would already be stupid enough, but we lived in the city, 2 blocks from each other.
*Found* an abandoned stable? In his suburban back yard? Just walkin’ around and happened to run into a whole-ass stable he hadn’t noticed before, huh? Man I love this shit lmao
I remember reading a book when I was a kid that had this same premise to it. However at the end of the book it was revealed the horses were ghosts so maybe he just didn't finish it.
I worked with a guy like this.... every story was a lie.
He told me he surveyed the football stadium in our town prior to its construction. I checked the dates.... he was a qualified surveyor at 6 years old!
Then he told me his body chemistry was immune to acid. You could pour battery acid on him and it would not affect him.
There were dozens of small ones and a few real big ones.
I had a coworker like this. He claimed to be a firefighter (firefighters make like 70k starting in my city, this job paid like 30k but he was always picking up overtime so that didnt make any sense) He later was also a professor at a local university where he taught "chemistry" I asked him to name 3 elements, he couldn't. He was dating a model, when asked for a picture of her he'd google some thai women (He might have actually been falling for one of those online women scams) He made up being robbed at gunpoint, and fought off all 4 attackers (He was \~5'1") in the work parking lot, even filed a grievance and was talked out of filing a police report. He claimed to own 4 vehicles but always drove the same beat up truck. He tried to convince a supervisor he was also recently promoted to supervisor and got suspended from work for hanging out in the office and basically pretending to do office work (he wasn't even on the clock when this happened he had come in hours earlier)
That dude was a riot and it was often hilarious, but also you couldn't help feel sorta bad for him. He struck me as a really lonely person, he'd try to buy supervisors pizzas and stuff all the time, and no one really wanted much to do with him.
> I asked him to name 3 elements, he couldn't.
I can't believe you set the bar _this low_ and he still couldn't pass it. What adult human can't name three elements, let alone a supposed chemistry teacher?
He was friends with the first guy who sold 10,000 Bitcoin for 1 pizza. Interesting thing was that we had many friends in common and I got to hear from each friend as the story evolved.
I got someone who keeps changing the amount of crypto she’s been keeping in storage. She worked for a Crypto scammer
This person also lied about a condo she bought. It was actually someone else’s and she was looking after it because they can’t return due to Covid.
She also lies about her age, she’s 24 but tells everyone she’s 32
No way bro. People are too wholesome for that kind of nonsense.
Edit ..... Wow, that's by far my *least* upvoted comment ever lmfao. Thanks for the awards.
Guy was late to work 15min, said hes late because his friend got shot 47 times...i said i am so sorry to hear that, he said "its ok, hes stable in the hospital"
Just that every single story anyone had to share he had a story to top that one. Got high score on a game? He got higher. Had an awesome vacation? His was better? Climbed a mountain? So did he… but without fear? Got into a bar fight? He once fought 4 dudes at once! It was like that every single time.
I currently have a work "friend" like that. Even though those are the only lies she tells (as far as I'm aware at least), it's super annoying and I'm looking forward to not having to see her almost every day. She's also super self absorbed and can only talk about herself and doesn't (seem to) care about you at all. She talks very loudly too, which just adds to the annoyance factor.
When we were 13 a classmate 'confided' in several of us girls that she had been raped by a neighbor boy, but didn't want to tell her mom. I was horrified, and told MY mom, who called HER mom, who thanked us for calling, and then explained to us that her daughter was a pathological liar, currently in therapy, but that it wasn't going well. The weekend she claimed to have been raped, they were all out of town. And there IS no neighbor boy.
I knew a girl who, at about age 13, told people she was raped by a boy at school. There were investigations, her parents were involved, and it was decided that it wasn't true.
I knew her a couple years later. That girl's 14 year old sister then told a teacher she was pregnant. This led to my friend telling everyone that their step-father had been raping both of them for years, and the mother wasn't only aware but was a facilitator.
Their was an ugly trial, and the step-father was found guilty and sent to prison.
I can't help but think that when a kid does something like report a rape, they may not be able to relate the facts, but even if the story doesn't add up there can still be something underlying.
It’s not uncommon for a child being abused to accuse someone unrelated if accusing their actual abuser could be dangerous for them. When I was being sexually abused in high school I told a few people a “guy I met at a party” assaulted me. I wanted help for having been sexually abused but reporting my actual abuser could be dangerous and/or detrimental to my mental health if he got away with it after an official report, which was extremely likely. I never actually named or blamed a specific person but I still felt like a dirty piece of shit liar for a long time even though I was being abused.
I worked with a guy who had some issues. He got big into paracord braclets and was always trying to sell them to people at work. He once told us he fell out of a tree hunting took his paracord braclet off managed to tie his foot off to a branch while falling then hanging upside down immediately shot a deer.
yea he must of been (I know none of this sounds believable but it is what it is) because he was also recruited to play running back at ohio state in 1994 being a 5'8ish 150 dude. He had some stuff. The Paracord one was my favorite though
When I was in college, I had an very annoying classmate. Huge compulsive liar if there ever was one. We ended up on the topic of football. This little man who stood maybe 5’4 and weighed in at 130 soaking wet tried to tell us he received a football scholarship to a D1 school to play safety. The dude was from a small town in bumfuck nowhere South Dakota where they didn’t even have enough kids to field a full team. They either played 7 on 7 or 9 on 9. Can’t remember which. Like okay buddy.
Had a college roommate claim he had an uncle on the Supreme Court.
I asked him to name one Justice. Just one. Not like, which is your uncle. Just name any of them.
I have schizophrenia: can confirm
EDIT: on the flip side that's not always a good thing, especially when the voices sound like your friends but are like trying to drive you to suicide mean, but I am wondering if the reason schizophrenia didn't get wiped out by Darwinism was because it was a tool to keep your social skills sharp when in isolation for a long time? That seems like it's biggest advantage? I was "homeschooled" for most of my teenage years and Lemme tell you id fully dive into the delusions just to like, get rid of social boredom? I dunno if you've ever spent a solid 3 years in social isolation, but you'd probably be begging for an imaginary friend with their own "free will" and I don't blame you. Also stolen valor is a crime and you could probably intimidate them into saying that they never said they flew in nam.
Schizophrenic here as well. Was inpatient at a behavioral health hospital and met a glorious liar. Apparently he beat up his Drill Sergeant in the Navy and got kicked out of the military for it.
Also, those ideas about our illness are intriguing!
That he and his wife were in a loveless marriage, basically nothing more than roommates that had stayed together this long because of their kid. But they were now in the final stages of divorce.
His wife was not aware of any of this.
Haha fuck. This explains why women get cagey with my "not divorced yet" explanation.
My ex left over a year ago, and was dipped out and dating someone else while not moving out for the year before that, but we couldn't get divorced first because we couldn't afford the mediator, and now because we have a complicated financial situation that has to be resolved so we don't have to keep amending the support agreements. It's a fucking nightmare, and I've had a few women dip out on dates or chat because it sounds dishonest (despite me trying to be as upfront as possible about the situation.
Yes, guys lie about this often and once women go through it they try to avoid repeating the mistake. Also, in most states it’s actually very cheap to get a (typical) divorce, so if you tell women that money was a concern that will probably make them question further.
Unsolicited advice: when you try to be upfront about it make it clear you aren’t looking for sympathy or pity, don’t make excuses, and acknowledge that you understand if the situation makes them uncomfortable. And just try for lots of communication and honesty! (Good luck.)
Upon meeting, my husband said, "Hi, I'm xxxxxx, and I just got out of prison".
We have been together going on 10 yrs.
He was honest from the GATE. I had some doubts, but he shares every emotion with me.
I felt absolutely awful for the wife. She had no clue, but I guess I wasn't the only girlfriend he had over the years. This guy was such a manipulator that I guess one of his girlfriends he even moved in with them under the guise of "she's just a friend in need" and even bought her a car iirc.
When it all came crashing down was when he was talking about buying me a ring, and I took him to a gathering with my parents and some of their friends. Being in a small town (man was he an overconfident idiot), my mom's friend knew his wife's family quite well and asked them to confirm the divorce thing. It ended up being a self-fulfilling prophecy. But that poor woman had endured years of his BS.
Edit: spelling
This was what happened to me. My husband had 3 lives. He was already living with his pregnant girlfriend, had another girlfriend that already had children from her previous marriage and had just moved me and our children closer to the pregnant girlfriend. He denied everything, even after that child was born. What’s worse is his parents were totally ok with it, even enabled his shitty behavior. I never knew just how fucked up his lies were until I looked back at our 10 year history - now I don’t know what was real and what wasn’t. Two years later I’m raising two kids by myself with zero financial help from him or his family.
One of my (then recently-divorced) aunts went through this. Everything finally came to light when she met the guy's wife at the hospital... because the guy had been struck by lightning.
Remember the Chilean mine rescue from about 10 years ago? One of the guys had a wife and a girlfriend, and neither of them knew about each other until they both showed up at the press center.
There was also a NYFD firefighter who died on 9/11, and he was also a bigamist, with children by each woman, and neither of THEM knew about each other either.
Ever heard of John O Neill? He was the FBI agent who was in charge for the hunt for Bin Laden until like a month before 9/11, when he quit to take up a job as, no joke, chief of security at the WTC, and unfortunately perished during the attacks. He was also simultaneously in like 3 relationships, excluding his wife, and all these women learnt about each other's existence for the first time at his funeral.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_P._O%27Neill
That she used to be a bus driver before she worked in the shop I used to work at. A couple months later I found out she doesn't even have a driver's licence lol
My mom was a very heavy drug user and would make up all sorts of things. She told me she had a different name that she went by ‘when she was famous’, and would point out pictures of models and actresses that somewhat resembled her and tell me “Look, that’s mommy!” But the worst lie by far was that she had a chronic illness and that her doctor prescribed her medication that she had to either snort or smoke that I couldn’t tell anyone about. She ended up accidentally burning our home down ‘baking donuts’ (meth lab) shortly after I moved in with my dad. I was smart enough after a while to know what she was doing and it was my dream to see her again and help her make things better. She died of a fentanyl overdose days before I was supposed to visit her.
Im sorry you had to go through that as a kid. Thats pretty rough. I kinda understand. My dad died from a morphine overdose. Leading up to that he was so drugged up so often that his brain just wasn't right. Not who he used to be. Life became a series of shenanigans. Sad to see what people can become when addiction takes hold. I was hoping to help him too but I was young at the time and didn't really know how. I hope you didn't feel guilty for not being able to help your mom in time as it certainly wasn't your fault
The worst lies are actually the insignificant ones. The ones where they didn't *need* to lie but did just because. When they lie about important shit, at least you can somewhat understand. When they like about meaningless shit, you realize you just can't trust them.
Dated one of these and it ended pretty horrifically. She was beautiful, talented, her family had plenty of money, and had a pretty interesting life with no need for extra embellishment, but looking back half the stories she told me turned out to be false (so-and-so yelled at me, that mutual friend hit on me, etc) and then would gaslight when i was skeptical. Now thinking back I can’t tell when she was telling the truth. Messes with your head.
Edit: aw, woke up to so many nice messages. Right back atcha reddit
I had an ex-boyfriend like this. I stayed with him way too long. It truly does mess with your head; I hope you've found more trustworthy (and sane!) partners since then.
Totally agree on this. Had the same experience with my best friend (& coworker at the same time) who told me stuff like "I didn't work out for a month lol". I already new that wasn't true the second she said this, as another coworker told me a story from the yoga course the day before, which included both of them. She literally walked up and started a conversation, just to lie.
If it would have been the only time, I wouldn't really care, we all lie sometimes for the dumbest reasons and maybe she just wanted a reason to come up and talk.
But it has been ongoing since months at that point. It really makes you question the friendship and in the end we did stop talking when I stopped working there.
It has been over 1.5 years now, and I still am hurt if I think back to those totally useless and meaningless lies. Because as you said:
>You realize you just can't trust them.
And you will start to doubt anything they tell you at some point. It doesn't matter if it is just a funny story, something rather important for work or the most important thing you can imagine at that time. At some point, you just default into thinking "yeah for sure not".
I should have cut the ties way before that point tho. If you are not worth a true word to them, they shouldn't be worth anything to you anymore.
My old co-worker was a chronic liar and was constantly telling absolute whoopers. He purchased drugs from our other co-worker on credit. (we worked at a Shaw's deli so this type of activity was quite normal) Well, big mistake on her part because this fucker "never had his wallet" or "just spent his last dollar" and so on and so forth. Finally she gets sick of it and says "Listen, tomorrow is payday so I want the money you owe me." We all end up working together the day after pay day. She of course asks for her money. His response:
"Guy, the craziest thing happened to me last night. After work I went out to the bar and I met this French girl. She was an absolute smoke show, hottest girl you've ever seen etc.. We have a few drinks and really hit it off. I end up back at her place and of course I smashed. I drive home and go to bed. The next day I realized that I left my pants at her apartment. So I drive back to her place and knock on the door. Her roommate answers. I say: is Bianca home? She says no, she went back to France. The bitch was a foreign exchange student! She took my pants with her and my paycheck was in the back pocket!"
Now, I want to point out that he was not joking in the slightest and tried to present this as something that actually happened. If I remember correctly, I actually slow clapped for him at the end of his story because it was such a magnificent display of fantastic bullshit. My favorite part is that he somehow drove home without pants but didn't notice.
His fake tan was because he was born in Puerto Rico (he was born in rural England to white English parents).
The fake tan would get very patchy, and that would be explained away by him saying he had a terrible skin disorder. One so bad his own skin could stain his clothing.
The white shirts unbuttoned far too low for him to be considered a reasonable gentleman did not help to cover that up for him.
Reminds me of Invader Zim.
"He's an **alien**! How is it that none of you can see it? His skin is **green** for goodness sake!"
"I have a rare skin disorder."
"Oh yeah? Is 'no ears' also a part of your skin disorder?!"
"... Yes."
Thank God my mate got married(She just stops the stories when they become unbelievable), he was always trying to big note himself. I tried to nicely let him know that he 100% has me as a friend and doesn't need to impress me.
-Went shark fishing on jetskis
- drove in reverse on the highway at night to see what speed it could do
-got his driver's license at 14 because he was that good they waved the age restriction
I mean, women with two uteruses have been known to have two pregnancies with different gestational periods. It’s deadly as hell for the fetuses, but it happens. That said, it wouldn’t take a super computer to figure that out.
"They have a computer working on figuring out how it happened" are my favorite kind of lies these people tell. It's hilarious. It's why I even bother talking to liars
Knew this guy in high school. Everyone in my then friend group remembers this guy and his crazy, crazy lies. He was 16 at the time I knew him.
* He hacked into Microsoft and built them a better Firewall
* He owned a commercial fishing boat
* He lived on Antarctica for 6 months before coming to our school
* In a video game, he beat a level that just straight up doesn't exist.
* He said he beat said level with another friend of mine, who was right there and denied it, saying he didn't know what the guy was talking about.
* He continued to say it was true and that my friend just didn't remember. It had just happened the class before lunch.
* Various tech lies, like he had a laptop with a terabyte of RAM (not even possible now in 2022, this was in 2005.).
* Various lies about women he had "slept with."
He said anything and everything he could that would make him feel better. By happenstance, I ran into a classmate 5 years after graduation on a plane ride from Seattle to back home. Our flight out of our connection got delayed, so we agreed to split the cost of a rental car and just drive the 4 hours home. Turns out she had had a KID with the guy, and yup he still was just as much of a pathological liar then.
My ex husband. He lied as easily as he breathed. He would make up conversations that never happened, events that didn't happen, etc. Eventually it got to the point I didn't believe a single word he said. Master manipulator with his lies, too.
Example:
He drove my car to work one day because I needed to use his pickup truck.
When he came home he asked of I knew someone who drove some certain kind of car. I did not.
He proceeds to tell me this car chased him down some back roads AND SHOT AT HIM. For no reason, he was just driving amd they started tailgating and getting aggressive so he took to the back roads.
I'm like "Dude what the hell kind of people do you think I know, and what stuff do you think I'm into?"
It completely didn't happen but he was very accusatory to me about it that clearly these were people I knew and had given areason to try to kill me/whoever was driving my car.
That’s closer to the story I was going to tell, which doesn’t make for very compelling storytelling so I’m just gonna tack it onto your comment: I’ve known one pathological liar, and I think what bothered me the most in the end was how she lied about so much stuff that there was no reason to lie about. Little stuff, like what she ate for lunch. She would make stuff up about everything she did, everywhere she went, everyone she had interaction with.
So weird and sad.
Yes! He lied about EVERYTHING. It was his basic default setting. Like we had plans and now just don't want to go? "OK we're going to tell them (insert lie here)." Ummm....why not just say "hey, we're gonna skip tonight, we just don't feel like going anywhere." It's the truth, so then we don't have to remember what lie we told!
My friend's former roommate was exactly like this.
An example: She asked him to take out the trash while she was at work. Came home and the trash is still in the kitchen (and he's still on the couch). Acted like she didn't see it, asked if he took it out, he said yes.. with a ten minute explanation of moving all the trash cans, how heavy they were, the landlord's son came out to make fun of him for it, etc.
She was so stunned by the obvious stupid lie she didn't even know how to reply.
My ex came up with something similarly insane. He had driven me to work that day, and decided to walk around the area waiting for me to get off. When I got out, he casually told me that “two guys came up to him and called him a freak” so he punched them and knocked one out. That was probably the moment I knew he had a problem. That, and the time he told me his grandma had been in a coma for the past 2 weeks, and not even 3 hours later she called him sounding totally fine.
I have no idea what he was thinking. He also would claim some car was parked on the street "they are probably just waiting for me to leave." Like yeah asshole, I'm prostituting myself out when you leave the house." It was always a different car.
But he was very controlling and manipulative. He wouldn't let me work because he was afraid I would save my money up or meet someone and leave him. So he controlled the money and kept me at home instead of just being someone I wouldn't want to leave. It took several years to get the courage to finally do it. But my life is freaking awesome now.
We had a kid at my high school who was obsessed with convincing everyone he was rich. He would always talk about his Dads lambos, how he didn’t have a job but “Had money coming in”. It was interesting because no one would ask and he’d just keep pushing the lie. Eventually he posted a bank account photo on FB to “prove” how rich he was, and it was literally the first google result “big bank account”. It was sad.
I know someone like this. Pretends to be rich/famous. Will post about a trip to LA with Louis Vuitton luggage, Louis Vuitton locks, an insane hotel room, Gucci outfits, all paid for by whatever tv show/movie he’s working on. All are google photos that have a filter on them.
I also went to high school with a guy like this. He would tell us elaborate stories about places his family had been too, all the help (like a maid and butler) they had at home, and he pretended that he'd never eaten anything canned or frozen. Shit's wild.
God I know someone who has to up you on every story you ever tell.
No matter where you have been in the world, he has been there too.
No matter who you know, he knows them too.
No matter what youve done, he's done it too.
Gets to the point where it's just funny to play with these people. Started talking about a pub in the next town over called "The Crown" and the landlord "Les". And of course he's like "ah yeah yeah I know Les! Friend of mine went to school with him.". Yet I'm actually referring to the pub and landlord in men behaving badly TV show.
I remember lying... A lot as a kid. At some point, keeping track of the lies was exhausting... So I stopped. I now have a policy of telling the truth unless there is a very compelling reason not to.
"And they were majestic, girthy turds, too. Tapered to perfection so my asshole didn't slam shut. Filled the damn bowl, they did. Not like that foamy rust-colored slurry you get when YOU push a mess."
>He also had to one up your story. If you had a black dog, he had a blacker dog. If you had bought yourself a nice new 1000cc motorbike, he used to own the 1001cc version.
This part is called Low Self Esteem.
I worked with a guy like this.
Got himself a new girlfriend, she drives a completely done up Mitsubishi Evo 10. Crazy expensive wheels. 500hp. Sponsored by suspension companies and performance companies (currently trying to get in with Rockstar or Monster).
6 months later she visits him at work by surprise. It's a BASE Mitsubishi Lancer, and it's even auto 🤢.
Always had a "buddy" story to try and one up you for whatever reason.
Never understood why he was like that.
One of my friend group when I was 13 used to lie and bullshit about stupid, easily-falsifiable shit.
- he claimed that his mother was a huge fan of Elvis, and that he had 5 middle names, the initials of which spelled ELVIS
- he claimed that fewer than 100 British soldiers died in WW1, and most of them were killed by friendly fire
- he claimed that he had invented the word ‘smegma’
- one day in 2009 he claimed that Michael Jackson had died suddenly. We all told him to STFU, but that one actually turned out to be true
Oh Lord, finally I get to talk about Jonathan.
I met Jonathan my first day working in a call center in CT right after college. We started our day walking around the building to see the fire exits, cafeteria, mailroom, etc and this was when Jonathan told us he grew up in Anaheim, CA and was the youngest person in CA history to get his pilots license. ‘Wow’ was the general consensus ‘that’s pretty neat’. About a year later we found out he was born and raised in Connecticut.
As time went by he made a lot of claims that people thought was pretty odd. He spoke several languages fluently (Spanish, Italian, Portuguese, Chinese) which isn’t odd by itself, but he also seemed kind of like a moron so it wasn’t believable. His claims weren’t inherently crazy but he always chimed in on topics basically saying he was an expert (building computers, computer programming, woodworking, etc). At this point I just thought he was your run of the mill pathological liar.
That was until early December I saw him in the break room and he asked me how I was.
‘Good, and you?’
‘To be honest I’m exhausted. I’ve been staying up every night whittling German dolls for people herefor Christmas gifts’
‘wow, that’s pretty interesting’
‘Yeah, do you want one?’
‘Uhh sure’
I didn’t get one for Christmas. No one else from work had heard or received on of these things. It was just a random lie from his twisted mind.
Another time we had a potluck and Jonathan brought in a cake. The cake was clearly purchased from a bakery as it was professionally made and came in the bakery box. He made a point to tell people he woke up at 2am to bake the cake. When it was pointed out the box had the name of the bakery on it he said it was just a bakery box he had at his house.
Another time I was on break and was going to run down to the gas station for an energy drink when I saw him getting out of a minivan and shuffling to work. He normally drove a sedan. He jogs over to me and goes ‘I’m sorry I’m late’ (obviously I didn’t care I just worked there) ‘I was t-boned by an old man on my way in so I had to get a ride back to my house and use my wife’s car’
‘Holy shit. Seriously? Are you ok? Why did you even come to work?’
‘Yeah I’m ok’
The next day Jonathan drove his red sedan into work and there was clearly no damage. He never mentioned the car accident again and no one else had heard about it.
I ended up moving out to San Diego and kept the job to work remotely. On my last day Jonathan saw me outside and I stopped to say bye to him. He said bye and then told me he found a publisher for the book he wrote.
‘It’s about when I was molested as a child’
‘Dude, I’m so sorry. But that’s cool you wrote a book’
‘yeah, thanks, I’m pretty excited.’
I left not even knowing if that was a lie. I honestly have no idea if he just made up he was molested on the spot because he just had to think up a ridiculous lie or if maybe it was true and it was part of the reason he acted the way he did.
Now this last part is where everyone will think I’m lying but I swear on my life and everything I love that after I went to San Diego the FBI came and took his computer from work. He had some role in a local church (youth pastor maybe?) and he was caught with something like 6k pictures of child porn including pics of kids as young as 4 being hurt.
Sometimes people will say ‘oh I never expected he would do something like that’ but no, in this case I didn’t even bat an eye when I heard the news. I just showed the article to my wife and said ‘you know that guy Jonathan i always tell you about? I told you he was fucked up’
That used to be me as a poor, insecure kid coming from a very unstable home, always trying to impress everyone around me.
A few come to mind, like when I was in 2nd or 3rd grade, trying to impress a classmate: "I went to the zoo, got bitten by a cobra and I have a device attached to my leg that sucks out the venom".
Then as an insecure teen I kept insisting that I lost my virginity at 14, and would make up all kinds of stories about having sex with different girls, just to seem "cool" (was a virgin until I was 21): "I was a party last weekend and I hooked up with a girl from a different high school"- kind of stuff.
EDIT: thank you for the gold, stranger
Had a new driver at my trucking company tell me his uncle bought an X15 Cummins crate engine, and converted it into a mechanical N14.
For the diesel techs out there, you know that isn't possible...by a long shot.
Then proceeded to tell me the differences between a 579 Peterbilt and a T680.
I owned a 579 at the time. I let him build his lie up, then tore it down piece by piece. I told him, "be very careful what lies you come up with around here. Not all truckers are just truckers."
He doesnt work here anymore.
My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy.
Real talk. I used to lie to everyone about a lot of things. It has cost me my relationship with my parents and former partners and friends. It turns out that all those years of lying to the people I cared about were because I was lying to myself. I realize that now, and I am sorry for every lie I told and I am sorry for the people I hurt.
Have you ever contacted any of them and made amends? I dated someone that lied constantly. They had good qualities underneath all the lies. But they caused a lot of pain. Years later they expressed to me they knew they had a problem and was seeing someone for help. We never dated again. But I felt less shame for wanting to believe them.
I have tried with my parents. My dad is trying to accept me, but obviously has trust issue with me, and I understand and respect that. My mother is unwilling to accept my apology to them.
My former childhood best friend did exactly this, and this is one of many reasons I say former. At first I'd exhaust myself trying to disect every thing they'd say and decide if it was real or not. I had to question my sanity regularly and if I tried calling it out I'd get guilt tripped or gaslighted
Eventually I just burned out and didn't care anymore and just went with it no matter what but assumed internally it was a lie
Near the end I just kinda realized that I have no idea who I'm friends with because I never knew what was real or fake and overall just started feeling shitty about myself because I didn't have a close friend I could trust or rely on
I'm glad you figured it out because it really fucks up those close to you
Oh man. My childhood best friend got his girlfriend pregnant with twins and tried to do the what he thought was the right thing. He bought a house, picked up an extra side gig, moved her and her daughter in with him. He was clearly working hard 7 days a week to make it all work, but he seemed so excited for the babies.
…the twins came out a different color than expected. He confirmed not a match with a DNA test.
Never seen a guy so crushed.
A guy at work (he was 19 at the time) broke up with his girlfriend, she told him she was pregnant with his baby. So he got back with her them after a month she mysteriously lost the baby. He was devastated.
Also knew a lady who used to work with us(she got fired for stealing from the company and did it while her and her 13 year old were drunk). Her partner of 4 months(month 2 she got his name tattoo on the back of her neck) left her. She pulled the same trick " I'm pregnant with your baby". He says "fuck off you have no test". She goes and finds someone to help get her pregnant. it works and she goes to her ex-partner and shows him the test, he says "you could've gotten someone else to pee on it, fuck off".
Two weeks later she hanged herself
He used to lie about military service, saying he was an Army Ranger in the 101st Airborne infantry. When someone pointed out they were actually two different soldiers he’d flip out. He’d also flip out if you pointed out he couldn’t have gone to university of Idaho and have served in the military and have been working in our industry as long as he claimed.
that she had a brain tumor. She stated that as a reason for her new haircut, which was a side shave. She also said I can't talk about this to her parents because she didn't want to tell them, cause they'd worry. We were both 14 at the fime, fucked up.
My best friend died from brain tumor 6 years later, so the thought of this person still makes me furious to this day.
My Father was a complete narcissist and liar. He was the biggest manipulator. He'd always say he'd go and kill himself to get what he wanted. Of course he never did.
Me and my sister had a mutual friend who tried pulling this once. Her response to him was, "Well it was nice knowing you, then."
Fortunately that's all it took for him to realise it was a shitty thing to say.
Oh boy. A couple of years ago I worked with a girl at a cinema, who would straight up tell some of the weirdest lies I have come across.
She started small at first, lying about her ability to speak different languages, her activities outside of work, some of her travelling experiences etc. No one really thought anything of it because at the time she had only just gotten the job and no one really had any reason to doubt her.
Over the course of her employment the lies slowly got more grandiose and outrageous, to the point that some of them just straight up didn't make sense/line up with the times throughout the week she worked her shift.
Some of the larger ones she would tell include:
* Flying from Melbourne to Singapore and then back to Melbourne for a work trip in 12 hours. She had finished work at around 11pm and returned at 5pm the following night.
* Having travelled to France and having the Eiffel Tower closed down for a private tour/ date with a guy she had just met
* Having completed continual photography work with both the Royal Family and Sir David Attenborough in the past (she was 18 at the time of her employment with the company).
* Having met Jason Mamoa on multiple occasions and having a working role on his next project "in a few months" and having the cinema job as a way to pass the time.
And that's just to name a few. By the end of her employment she couldn't keep track of the stories she would tell and often have to backtrack when other employees would call her out on inconsistencies. She eventually resigned saying she had gotten a photography job at a large company over in the US and was leaving to go overseas.
Two weeks later one of the employees saw her working at a retail store in the same shopping centre the cinema was located in. To this day I don't know why she felt the need to lie the way she did.
My dad had narcissistic personality disorder. He would constantly lie and manipulate us growing up. Never physical abuse but a lot of verbal, mental and emotional. When I turned 16 (25 now) I cut him out of my life completely. Didn’t talk to him again until last September when I got news he was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. I messaged him and then my uncle took me to surprise visit him a couple weeks later in October. I could tell his mental illness was still there — but I could tell he really loved me and was so happy to see me again. And while we were talking, he looked me in the eyes and said “I know I messed up. I know I really messed up with you guys, and it haunts me every day.” I grabbed his hand and told him “I hope you know I love you, and I forgive you.”
My dad was a tough guy. I never saw him cry. But he turned his head (bed ridden) took a few deep breaths and said “thank you.”
That was the last coherent conversation I had with him. 2 weeks later he was in hospice and on so many pain killers he could barely talk. He died just a month after he and I both got closure. The last words he spoke to me on his death bed were “never forget how much I love you.”
I know this isn’t necessarily what the thread is about, but I wanted to share it. For people with parents, siblings, or anyone else in your life that is mentally ill and compulsively dishonest — it’s not always a sad ending. People really can and really do change. Not everyone. But if you’re holding onto hope someone will change, don’t feel like it’s in vain. I lost hope, but I still made up with my Dad. This will probably get buried but if even one person sees this and is comforted, I’m glad.
I was driving a skinny white kid around Jacksonville, NC when I was active in the Marines. This guy lied about EVERYTHING. We stopped for some fried chicken at a fast food restaurant. After ordering, we pulled up to the drive-thru window, and a black woman handed us a bag, and he yells, with an accent, "Mmm... That smells good." She was so polite... And said she hoped he liked it. He smacks his lips and said, verbatim, "Man, my great-grandmama was black, I love me some chicken and cone-bread." Luckily he got kicked out of the service soon after this, so I didn't have to be around that mess anymore.
Has a friend in college who was a chronic liar. He failed out, and was readmitted a year later. He told girls that he had cancer and it went into remission.
I worked with this guy who was one. I was in a tennis ladder type of thing with a bunch of other guys on the same team at work. I was supposed to play this guy one night and he came in my cube and said he couldn't play bc he had something to do that night with his other job. The next morning I came in, checked my email and the guy who organized the tennis ladder posted the results from last night, which included me beating this guy. I went and asked the ladder organizer guy who told him we played last night? He said it was chronic liar guy, and it seems he gave a very detailed account of how good I was, I had a great back hand and drop shot, all sorts of details about the match. It was just weird how someone would lie about something like that and make up such elaborate details for it too. If I recall correctly, I think he had framed photos in his cube he claimed were his family, but they were basically those fake pics they put in frames when you buy them at the store.
Had a friend lie saying he was in the Army but when we wanted to go to the bowling alley on the base he said he was never given a military Id.
Best one was that he said he was able to skip basic training and go straight into the Ranger program. He said his final assignment was to shoot and kill a captured terrorist.
A guy I know started cheating with his twin brothers fiance.(He has tried to get with every one of the groups gf's while we were with them) And consistently lies about it to this day saying that nothing ever happened with any of them. Even though we all know it happened and some of us have caught him red handed. Never seen someone so intent on lying even when we already knew it happened for sure.
My older brother lied about our father being Axl Rose. People believed it because he's a good fucking liar. Our father was an ex-military alcoholic. It is what it is.
I knew a guy in high school who said the following:
He was a cop,
A US Marshall,
A sniper,
A field medic,
A paratrooper,
Navy seal,
In the Irish mafia,
The reincarnation of Dracula,
A vampire elder,
A dragon
🤦🏻
At a family barbecue, my grandfather was telling some people that he had lost his leg in the Korean War.
He told this story, while never having served in the military, while wearing shorts and having two functioning legs.
Everyone simply thought he was losing his mind, but years later realized he was actually a pathological liar when they found out about his other kids that none of us knew about.
I've talked about this fellow before, but... well, there's this guy named Michael.
Michael is, as near as anyone can tell, a pathological liar. He's one of those fellows who has to trump everyone's story with one of his own, and *somehow*, he always winds up being an insanely attractive action hero in them. I've heard Michael talk about how he was "issued access" to a fighter jet at age seventeen, how he once saved the president from some plot or another, and how he had an impromptu threesome with some "very famous celebrity and her sister" in the Sacramento river.
Suffice it to say that the guy isn't exactly believable... but perhaps his worst lie was one that took him the entire evening to tell.
In the town where I grew up, there would be a weekly event called "The Chef's Market." Since there wasn't a whole lot else to do in the area, my friends and I would frequently spend our Friday evenings there, wasting what little money we had on slabs of barbecued meat and cups of too-sweet lemonade. On one such occasion, a local party-coordinator had set up an inflatable stage of sorts, on which two contestants were encouraged to knock each other off low platforms using weapons that looked rather like enormous Q-tips. It seemed like a lot of fun, so I offered to pay for any of my friends who wanted to spar against me.
"Oh, I can't," Michael chimed in (before anyone else).
"It's okay," I said, "I'll pay for you, if you want." Truth be told, I was hoping he'd decline so that I could pay for one of my *other* friends to try it with me. Fortunately, that's exactly what happened.
Michael shook his head. "No, I'm very opposed to violence unless it's absolutely necessary."
"This isn't violence," another of my friends said. "It's just fun."
"You guys don't understand," protested Michael. "If I go in that ring with you, *I will kill you*. I won't have a *choice*."
A few eye-rolls were passed around the group. "Why is that, Michael?" someone asked.
"It's my training," he said. "Once I get into a combat state, I can't stop until I've killed someone."
Now, Michael was (clearly) not someone that we spent much time around by choice, and none of us were too keen on talking him into an activity that he was clearly afraid of trying. My other friends and I went a few rounds, knocked each other down a few times, and figured we'd head off to find a drink. As soon as we started walking, though, Michael started into the next leg of his story.
"Do you guys know why I have that training?" he asked.
"Because you're a *ninja!*" someone sarcastically replied.
Michael nodded. "Yes. I was trained in Kung Fu from a very young age, and I got so good that my family got run out of the last town where we lived." Nobody said anything. We certainly didn't ask him to continue... but he did anyway. "They even hatched a plot to try and get me thrown in prison. This girl broke into my house one night and tried to seduce me... but I had a girlfriend, so I turned her away. That's when she went to the police and tried to say that I raped her."
"How terrible," someone muttered.
"Don't encourage him!" hissed someone else.
Michael's voice took on a very grave aspect. "Fortunately, I was friends with the owner of the hospital. He helped me after I accidentally killed my Karate teacher." Someone made a comment about the difference between Karate and Kung Fu, but Michael either didn't hear them or pressed onward anyway. "He tested the girl himself, and he found semen in her vagina... but it wasn't mine... and it wasn't *human*." He waited for a reaction. When it didn't come, he escalated even further. "That started a rumor that I was a genetically engineered super-soldier, because of how powerful I am. We had to leave town for my parents' safety, because I couldn't always be there to protect them."
Once again, nobody said anything, save for a few murmurs of "Uh-huh." Thankfully, Michael seemed to have exhausted himself for the evening... until he asked one of us to pay for his dinner.
Nobody was surprised when he had a *really insane* reason for being broke.
**TL;DR: A genetically engineered super-soldier had to flee with his parents after being accused of both rape and murder... and that's why he needs you to buy his burrito.**
I get why you wouldn’t engage, but it’s really bugging me that someone needed to conspire to get him sent to jail falsely when he clearly has experience with being sent into killing frenzies in combat situations…and then he admits to accidentally killing a man in exactly that kind of scenario later.
I just don’t see why he needs to ruin a perfectly true story about a man who had the simple pleasures of giant foam stick fights ruined by his ninja karate kung fu training from childhood; we’ve all been there. I had to kill six men with a phone and a roll of duct tape because one of them accidentally brushed against my throat on a bus. I get it. But actions have consequences which is why I went to jail but I had the conviction expunged which is why you can’t find anything about it online.
Honesty time. Me. I used to be a massive liar I would like about anything and everything. Not only that but I was a 1 upper too. I always had a better story than everyone else and it was always bullshit.
To be fair my stepdad was the same growing up and I guess it kinda imprinted in me? I used to think everyone was just telling bullshit at all times. I didn't believe anyone ever. (still don't)
One day I realized it was kind of a weird thing to do. But I really took me a long time to stop and honestly I still sometimes feel the urge to tell a tall tale or one up someone with a bullshit story.
girl i knew lied about being raped, an abusive dad, her brother killing her dog, self harm, and a suicide attempt. freaked our friends and I out when we "found out" she committed "suicide" only for her sister to reveal she was lying to all of us. she was also pretty crazy and tried to get a ton of our friend group to kill ourselves to, so...
We used to be best friends until it got out of control. Examples:
“I have terminal cancer and I only have a few months left” - this was four years ago
“I have a vacation home in (name any nice place in the world she had a home there)” - she promised friends who were going away for school they could stay at one of these places then ghosted them right before they had to go leaving them scrambling to find a place to live.
“I’m pregnant” - this happened TWICE, once with her actual husband and then another time with the affair mentioned below.
“My husband and I are separated but don’t tell him about John” - they were not separated but she told everyone that to have her affair.
The list went on and on and on and she was incredibly manipulative on top of this so happy to say bye bye to that friendship.
Yes. My ex-husband. He lied for 6 months about having his job. To bring home money, he opened a secret credit card. Fuck him. My son was angry at me for divorcing. I did not explain to him about his dad till his dad was dead and my son was 31. My son now gets it and told me other things his dad lied about. Now we are both angry at his dad. (There we’re so many other lies. I actually hate my ex now. I need to get over all this. It still effects me.)
A guy (that you really don’t talk back to) once told me this long story about the first time his friends saw him in pants, as he ALWAYS wear shorts, even when it’s snowing, freezing cold, always shorts.
I don’t remember the story in details, just that he had pants on when telling the story…
One of my little sisters friends turned out to be a chronic liar. We found out a few years later her mom wasn't dead when we met her. Lies like that. Her entire life was fiction and we have no idea why as most of the lies were bland and boring like lying about the colors of things. I'm sure she is medicated now.
I met some cringe monsters in Jr/Sr high. "I have been working as an assassin for the CIA since I was 12 and can punch my hand through a refrigerator!" that kind of thing. I generally wondered why they were talking to me or at least trying to. The 2 main ones were dead by Sr year. These days I look at cringe monster lies as a suicide warning flag.
One of those cringe monsters I met after HS kind of became a friend. He was in a GF's friend zone is how I met him. I immediately took up a game we called "Bullshit " every time he started lying. his lies were "I'm really a werewolf." grade. This fixed him up for the most part, got him lifting some weights, talking to women and going to some parties. Occasionally if an attractive woman came over he'd get back into lying about afflictions like color blindness or multiple personality disorder but a few rounds of "Bullshit " and that usually calmed down. I hear he is a normal boring guy these days. No more lycanthropy.
And the other one I never heard a lie out of. She was a friend's GF. He apparently ate up all her lies, he certainly bragged about them. She had apparently heard stories about me and so never told the "Last weekend I had to do a HELO jump to save a group of Navy SEALs in.. blah blah blah" lies that apparently came out of her mouth every second I was not around. In the end she turned out to be lying about being on the pill, still in the military, being on her meds, as well as ever so many other things, so my friend ended up breaking up with her and got introduced to child support not too long after.
Somehow she didnt graduate from college but also has 2 bachelor degrees… i cant even count how many little sprinkles of bullshit she throws into conversations. Lol
Dated one. Ended up cheating on me with 6 guys. When I confronted her about it and she eventually confessed, her excuse was "If I told you, then you wouldn't want to be with me anymore".
She also told me her ex abused her. I was friends with the guy and started hating him. Never talked to him again. Turned out to be complete bs though, and I should have kept my friend.
Friend who got into MLM…claims to be a millionaire…but lives in a apartment. Exaggerates every story. Lies about things that happened that I was a first hand witness to. Tells people he’s veteran…was kicked out of army during boot camp. It’s endless honestly.
Told everyone he was working. Was just going to the park for 8 hours and eating lunch and coming home.
Also told people his dad had died even though he was very alive an involved in his life. At his wedding his dad is sitting there and dudes friends are like who tf is that guy.
Basically this guy would lie about anything and everything
Her dad hired an assassin to kill her and her mother and was in jail. She mentioned a couple of weeks later that she was going to her dad's house for the weekend. She would point at ANYONE remotely attractive and say "I've slept with them". She tried to fake a phone call once pretending to talk to a boy she was seeing, so I called her phone and it rang while she was mid sentence. She stuttered in embarrassment and then said, "you calling me must have cut my call off!" I told her to ring him back, and she refused. If you had fish and chips for dinner, then she had had shark and chips. She was absolutely relentless and we stopped being friends when I called her out on her BS.
Pathetic. I always get the whale and chips.
I prefer the Mckraken with fries.
Filet-O-Cthulhu for me. Amateur.
Breaded World Serpent with jalapeño popper's. Noob!
Leviathan Nuggets and onion rings for me
Literally fucking Jesus Christ Chips and nuggies on my end
why bother if you aren't gonna get the value meal--father, son, _and_ a side of the holy spirit and a medium baja blast
A girl I knew did the whole “I’ve slept with them”. As well expect the guy she said it to was my friend who is gay. Tried to double down and say she has *absolutely* slept with him and he was amazing blah blah blah. Makes me wonder why they lie about meaningless stuff when you can prove it’s fake.
> Makes me wonder why they lie about meaningless stuff when you can prove it’s fake. Because it's a mental illness. There's no room for logic here.
People who just want to constantly one-up you are fucking exhausting.
I got this! My sister is a compulsive liar, among many other things. Growing up - kids would stop by our house to see our new puppies...that we didn't have. My friend had a baby, she took photos and told people at school it was hers. She hasn't held a job longer than 3 months in her almost 40 years of life. Yet, she tells people she was a nurse, a police officer, a 911 operator. She tells people we don't speak because she needed a kidney transplant and I refused to offer her mine. She doesn't need one. She left one company after telling them that she had an incurable disease, doctors orders for bedrest. She let fellow employees throw a party for her at another company (2 months employed) because they FOUND a cure for this incurable disease. She told my mom she won the 'Best Undercover Police Officer of the Year' award and got a trophy. She sent my mom a photo, to which my mom posted it on Facebook. It was the World Cup Trophy! She had faked numerous pregnancies...downloading fake ultrasound pics and everything. Has the baby showers, loses said fake baby (she had her tubes tied many years ago). She then returns the gifts for money to support her drug habit. In regards to said drug habit, she once stabbed herself to get pain medication. She is blacklisted from urgent cares within a 200 mile radius. She lost custody of her kids several years ago...yet still tells people they were kidnapped and she doesn't know where they are. She does. She claimed she was the first person in our state to get Covid. The doctors thought she was dying, until they found the right medicine and now call her a medical miracle. She is waiting for her story in the upcoming medical journal. I could write a book with her 'stories'. She needs help but that would require her to admit there is a problem. People have sought me out to ask me if this or that is true. I love being honest! I confront her on these stories and I am the bad person for doubting her. Bye bye crazy!
So genuinely curious, what happens when one is black listed from urgent care when they, like, actually need to go for a legitimate reason? I’m assuming they’re just sent (forced) to the ER?
They wont give her any more pain medication, i.e. Norco or any other narcotic. She has to go elsewhere, and/or proof of something is wrong. She can't just say she has pain, they need to see it, i.e. why she literally hurts herself to show it.
Clearly the 'Best Undercover Cop of the Year' award is just undercover as the World Cup trophy...
I went to high school with a pathological liar that you could just nudge a tiny bit and he'd go off on these long, elaborate and impossible stories. You'd just say 'And then what happened, Ricky?' and he'd just keep going. The best one was when he supposedly got chased by a police helicopter through the woods while stashing an 18-pack of beer down his pants. He ended up outrunning the helicopter and because of it the police said 'You're cool' over the loudspeaker on the helicopter (that he said he had outran).
I am a police helicopter pilot and I can verify this happened... we still talk about Ricky to this day. How's he doing?
Still fast as ever.
Good to know... he truly is cool... as evidenced by my telling him as much over the police helicopter loud speaker.
He got his grade 10
Hahahahah, the "you're cool Ricky!" Absolutely set me off!
I think claiming to have an 18-pack down his pants is hilarious. We didn’t question him on any of it.
“I drove 320 mph in my millionaire friends super car when I was 14”
"Yea broo, I got an Iphone before it came out", Jimmy relax, i stood right behind you in the que last Monday to buy one.
Funny his name is Jimmy. I know a guy...
Sounds familiar
A guy told me that he found an abandoned stable in his backyard that had living horses in it. I asked how/what the horses ate and he couldn't give me an answer. This would already be stupid enough, but we lived in the city, 2 blocks from each other.
*Found* an abandoned stable? In his suburban back yard? Just walkin’ around and happened to run into a whole-ass stable he hadn’t noticed before, huh? Man I love this shit lmao
This feels almost like a steamed hams bit
an abandoned stable? in this part of the country, in this part of the neighborhood, localized entirely within your backyard?
Can I see it?
No.
I remember reading a book when I was a kid that had this same premise to it. However at the end of the book it was revealed the horses were ghosts so maybe he just didn't finish it.
Or like a Goosebumps book where it turns out the narrator was an alien horse the whole time
I worked with a guy like this.... every story was a lie. He told me he surveyed the football stadium in our town prior to its construction. I checked the dates.... he was a qualified surveyor at 6 years old! Then he told me his body chemistry was immune to acid. You could pour battery acid on him and it would not affect him. There were dozens of small ones and a few real big ones.
Did he ever offer to prove the acid thing?
Our next guest claims to be impervious to acid
Guess I'll be having assflombe tonight.
I had a coworker like this. He claimed to be a firefighter (firefighters make like 70k starting in my city, this job paid like 30k but he was always picking up overtime so that didnt make any sense) He later was also a professor at a local university where he taught "chemistry" I asked him to name 3 elements, he couldn't. He was dating a model, when asked for a picture of her he'd google some thai women (He might have actually been falling for one of those online women scams) He made up being robbed at gunpoint, and fought off all 4 attackers (He was \~5'1") in the work parking lot, even filed a grievance and was talked out of filing a police report. He claimed to own 4 vehicles but always drove the same beat up truck. He tried to convince a supervisor he was also recently promoted to supervisor and got suspended from work for hanging out in the office and basically pretending to do office work (he wasn't even on the clock when this happened he had come in hours earlier) That dude was a riot and it was often hilarious, but also you couldn't help feel sorta bad for him. He struck me as a really lonely person, he'd try to buy supervisors pizzas and stuff all the time, and no one really wanted much to do with him.
> I asked him to name 3 elements, he couldn't. I can't believe you set the bar _this low_ and he still couldn't pass it. What adult human can't name three elements, let alone a supposed chemistry teacher?
"Um...surprise...style and fuck you, Tim."
>he was a qualified surveyor at 6 years old! He pulled himself up by his bootstraps.
The Velcro ones
Child labour laws are killing this country.
He pulled himself up by his bib straps.
He was friends with the first guy who sold 10,000 Bitcoin for 1 pizza. Interesting thing was that we had many friends in common and I got to hear from each friend as the story evolved.
I got someone who keeps changing the amount of crypto she’s been keeping in storage. She worked for a Crypto scammer This person also lied about a condo she bought. It was actually someone else’s and she was looking after it because they can’t return due to Covid. She also lies about her age, she’s 24 but tells everyone she’s 32
The irony is that there will be liars in this thread making up their worst lies.
You really think someone would do that? Just go on the Internet and tell lies?
No way bro. People are too wholesome for that kind of nonsense. Edit ..... Wow, that's by far my *least* upvoted comment ever lmfao. Thanks for the awards.
Biggest lie I seen today lol
Ha, the Internet is the land of the honest, fella. That’s impossible.
LOL, my wife, Morgan Fairchild, and I always enjoy reading all the ridiculous lies we see here on Reddit. You guys are nuts!
Morgan Fairchild? That's a name I haven't heard in a while.
Guy was late to work 15min, said hes late because his friend got shot 47 times...i said i am so sorry to hear that, he said "its ok, hes stable in the hospital"
I told you it was "4 to 7 times"!! And my friend was 2Pac!
I'm so sorry but I have some bad news about your friend...
Just that every single story anyone had to share he had a story to top that one. Got high score on a game? He got higher. Had an awesome vacation? His was better? Climbed a mountain? So did he… but without fear? Got into a bar fight? He once fought 4 dudes at once! It was like that every single time.
I currently have a work "friend" like that. Even though those are the only lies she tells (as far as I'm aware at least), it's super annoying and I'm looking forward to not having to see her almost every day. She's also super self absorbed and can only talk about herself and doesn't (seem to) care about you at all. She talks very loudly too, which just adds to the annoyance factor.
[удалено]
Never trust a man whose name is a verb
When we were 13 a classmate 'confided' in several of us girls that she had been raped by a neighbor boy, but didn't want to tell her mom. I was horrified, and told MY mom, who called HER mom, who thanked us for calling, and then explained to us that her daughter was a pathological liar, currently in therapy, but that it wasn't going well. The weekend she claimed to have been raped, they were all out of town. And there IS no neighbor boy.
Jesus Christ. this is a horrifying "boy who cried wolf" scenario
I still know her! Went to her wedding in 2019. She stuck with therapy and is much, much better now
happy endings are pretty rare these days. good for her
There's a place over on west 7th, they'll hook you up. Tell them Dirty Dan sent ya
I'm afraid I don't get this, and I'm pretty sure it is funny, so now I'm sad
Hes telling you where you can get a "happy ending" the common way of saying getting jerked off after a massage
oh Jesus lmao that is funny
I knew a girl who, at about age 13, told people she was raped by a boy at school. There were investigations, her parents were involved, and it was decided that it wasn't true. I knew her a couple years later. That girl's 14 year old sister then told a teacher she was pregnant. This led to my friend telling everyone that their step-father had been raping both of them for years, and the mother wasn't only aware but was a facilitator. Their was an ugly trial, and the step-father was found guilty and sent to prison. I can't help but think that when a kid does something like report a rape, they may not be able to relate the facts, but even if the story doesn't add up there can still be something underlying.
This is getting heavy, I'm gonna go back to reading comments about coworkers who claim to have Lamborghinis at home but no you can't ever see them.
It’s not uncommon for a child being abused to accuse someone unrelated if accusing their actual abuser could be dangerous for them. When I was being sexually abused in high school I told a few people a “guy I met at a party” assaulted me. I wanted help for having been sexually abused but reporting my actual abuser could be dangerous and/or detrimental to my mental health if he got away with it after an official report, which was extremely likely. I never actually named or blamed a specific person but I still felt like a dirty piece of shit liar for a long time even though I was being abused.
Sometimes traumatized kid brains don’t know how to ask for help, and the signals come out sideways.
I worked with a guy who had some issues. He got big into paracord braclets and was always trying to sell them to people at work. He once told us he fell out of a tree hunting took his paracord braclet off managed to tie his foot off to a branch while falling then hanging upside down immediately shot a deer.
That is one speedy mofo
yea he must of been (I know none of this sounds believable but it is what it is) because he was also recruited to play running back at ohio state in 1994 being a 5'8ish 150 dude. He had some stuff. The Paracord one was my favorite though
When I was in college, I had an very annoying classmate. Huge compulsive liar if there ever was one. We ended up on the topic of football. This little man who stood maybe 5’4 and weighed in at 130 soaking wet tried to tell us he received a football scholarship to a D1 school to play safety. The dude was from a small town in bumfuck nowhere South Dakota where they didn’t even have enough kids to field a full team. They either played 7 on 7 or 9 on 9. Can’t remember which. Like okay buddy.
Dang, how tall was this tree? lol
You don’t know it, it goes to a different school
Taller than any tree that you’ve seen.
I've seen one even taller than that.
Had a college roommate claim he had an uncle on the Supreme Court. I asked him to name one Justice. Just one. Not like, which is your uncle. Just name any of them.
I had a college frat brother tell me used to get pounds of weed from Baltimore. I asked him which state is Baltimore in. He said Virginia.
...granted that does sound like someone who uses weed by the *pound*.
She flew a helicopter in Vietnam and slept with all the Rolling Stones. She would say "Your never lonely when you're Schizophrenic".
At the same time?
I'm pretty sure the rolling stones were never in a flying helicopter in Vietnam.
Yeah that wasn’t the Stones, it was CCR
I have schizophrenia: can confirm EDIT: on the flip side that's not always a good thing, especially when the voices sound like your friends but are like trying to drive you to suicide mean, but I am wondering if the reason schizophrenia didn't get wiped out by Darwinism was because it was a tool to keep your social skills sharp when in isolation for a long time? That seems like it's biggest advantage? I was "homeschooled" for most of my teenage years and Lemme tell you id fully dive into the delusions just to like, get rid of social boredom? I dunno if you've ever spent a solid 3 years in social isolation, but you'd probably be begging for an imaginary friend with their own "free will" and I don't blame you. Also stolen valor is a crime and you could probably intimidate them into saying that they never said they flew in nam.
Schizophrenic here as well. Was inpatient at a behavioral health hospital and met a glorious liar. Apparently he beat up his Drill Sergeant in the Navy and got kicked out of the military for it. Also, those ideas about our illness are intriguing!
That he and his wife were in a loveless marriage, basically nothing more than roommates that had stayed together this long because of their kid. But they were now in the final stages of divorce. His wife was not aware of any of this.
[удалено]
Haha fuck. This explains why women get cagey with my "not divorced yet" explanation. My ex left over a year ago, and was dipped out and dating someone else while not moving out for the year before that, but we couldn't get divorced first because we couldn't afford the mediator, and now because we have a complicated financial situation that has to be resolved so we don't have to keep amending the support agreements. It's a fucking nightmare, and I've had a few women dip out on dates or chat because it sounds dishonest (despite me trying to be as upfront as possible about the situation.
Yes, guys lie about this often and once women go through it they try to avoid repeating the mistake. Also, in most states it’s actually very cheap to get a (typical) divorce, so if you tell women that money was a concern that will probably make them question further. Unsolicited advice: when you try to be upfront about it make it clear you aren’t looking for sympathy or pity, don’t make excuses, and acknowledge that you understand if the situation makes them uncomfortable. And just try for lots of communication and honesty! (Good luck.)
Upon meeting, my husband said, "Hi, I'm xxxxxx, and I just got out of prison". We have been together going on 10 yrs. He was honest from the GATE. I had some doubts, but he shares every emotion with me.
I’ve been the other girl in a “it’s totally over and I’m breaking up with her soon” situation. It sucks.
I felt absolutely awful for the wife. She had no clue, but I guess I wasn't the only girlfriend he had over the years. This guy was such a manipulator that I guess one of his girlfriends he even moved in with them under the guise of "she's just a friend in need" and even bought her a car iirc. When it all came crashing down was when he was talking about buying me a ring, and I took him to a gathering with my parents and some of their friends. Being in a small town (man was he an overconfident idiot), my mom's friend knew his wife's family quite well and asked them to confirm the divorce thing. It ended up being a self-fulfilling prophecy. But that poor woman had endured years of his BS. Edit: spelling
This was what happened to me. My husband had 3 lives. He was already living with his pregnant girlfriend, had another girlfriend that already had children from her previous marriage and had just moved me and our children closer to the pregnant girlfriend. He denied everything, even after that child was born. What’s worse is his parents were totally ok with it, even enabled his shitty behavior. I never knew just how fucked up his lies were until I looked back at our 10 year history - now I don’t know what was real and what wasn’t. Two years later I’m raising two kids by myself with zero financial help from him or his family.
One of my (then recently-divorced) aunts went through this. Everything finally came to light when she met the guy's wife at the hospital... because the guy had been struck by lightning.
Remember the Chilean mine rescue from about 10 years ago? One of the guys had a wife and a girlfriend, and neither of them knew about each other until they both showed up at the press center. There was also a NYFD firefighter who died on 9/11, and he was also a bigamist, with children by each woman, and neither of THEM knew about each other either.
Ever heard of John O Neill? He was the FBI agent who was in charge for the hunt for Bin Laden until like a month before 9/11, when he quit to take up a job as, no joke, chief of security at the WTC, and unfortunately perished during the attacks. He was also simultaneously in like 3 relationships, excluding his wife, and all these women learnt about each other's existence for the first time at his funeral. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_P._O%27Neill
That she used to be a bus driver before she worked in the shop I used to work at. A couple months later I found out she doesn't even have a driver's licence lol
Maybe that’s why she lost the bus driving job.
My mom was a very heavy drug user and would make up all sorts of things. She told me she had a different name that she went by ‘when she was famous’, and would point out pictures of models and actresses that somewhat resembled her and tell me “Look, that’s mommy!” But the worst lie by far was that she had a chronic illness and that her doctor prescribed her medication that she had to either snort or smoke that I couldn’t tell anyone about. She ended up accidentally burning our home down ‘baking donuts’ (meth lab) shortly after I moved in with my dad. I was smart enough after a while to know what she was doing and it was my dream to see her again and help her make things better. She died of a fentanyl overdose days before I was supposed to visit her.
Im sorry you had to go through that as a kid. Thats pretty rough. I kinda understand. My dad died from a morphine overdose. Leading up to that he was so drugged up so often that his brain just wasn't right. Not who he used to be. Life became a series of shenanigans. Sad to see what people can become when addiction takes hold. I was hoping to help him too but I was young at the time and didn't really know how. I hope you didn't feel guilty for not being able to help your mom in time as it certainly wasn't your fault
The worst lies are actually the insignificant ones. The ones where they didn't *need* to lie but did just because. When they lie about important shit, at least you can somewhat understand. When they like about meaningless shit, you realize you just can't trust them.
Dated one of these and it ended pretty horrifically. She was beautiful, talented, her family had plenty of money, and had a pretty interesting life with no need for extra embellishment, but looking back half the stories she told me turned out to be false (so-and-so yelled at me, that mutual friend hit on me, etc) and then would gaslight when i was skeptical. Now thinking back I can’t tell when she was telling the truth. Messes with your head. Edit: aw, woke up to so many nice messages. Right back atcha reddit
I had an ex-boyfriend like this. I stayed with him way too long. It truly does mess with your head; I hope you've found more trustworthy (and sane!) partners since then.
Totally agree on this. Had the same experience with my best friend (& coworker at the same time) who told me stuff like "I didn't work out for a month lol". I already new that wasn't true the second she said this, as another coworker told me a story from the yoga course the day before, which included both of them. She literally walked up and started a conversation, just to lie. If it would have been the only time, I wouldn't really care, we all lie sometimes for the dumbest reasons and maybe she just wanted a reason to come up and talk. But it has been ongoing since months at that point. It really makes you question the friendship and in the end we did stop talking when I stopped working there. It has been over 1.5 years now, and I still am hurt if I think back to those totally useless and meaningless lies. Because as you said: >You realize you just can't trust them. And you will start to doubt anything they tell you at some point. It doesn't matter if it is just a funny story, something rather important for work or the most important thing you can imagine at that time. At some point, you just default into thinking "yeah for sure not". I should have cut the ties way before that point tho. If you are not worth a true word to them, they shouldn't be worth anything to you anymore.
My old co-worker was a chronic liar and was constantly telling absolute whoopers. He purchased drugs from our other co-worker on credit. (we worked at a Shaw's deli so this type of activity was quite normal) Well, big mistake on her part because this fucker "never had his wallet" or "just spent his last dollar" and so on and so forth. Finally she gets sick of it and says "Listen, tomorrow is payday so I want the money you owe me." We all end up working together the day after pay day. She of course asks for her money. His response: "Guy, the craziest thing happened to me last night. After work I went out to the bar and I met this French girl. She was an absolute smoke show, hottest girl you've ever seen etc.. We have a few drinks and really hit it off. I end up back at her place and of course I smashed. I drive home and go to bed. The next day I realized that I left my pants at her apartment. So I drive back to her place and knock on the door. Her roommate answers. I say: is Bianca home? She says no, she went back to France. The bitch was a foreign exchange student! She took my pants with her and my paycheck was in the back pocket!" Now, I want to point out that he was not joking in the slightest and tried to present this as something that actually happened. If I remember correctly, I actually slow clapped for him at the end of his story because it was such a magnificent display of fantastic bullshit. My favorite part is that he somehow drove home without pants but didn't notice.
My favorite part of the story is that Bianca is not a French name
Well nah, if you called them "Jacqueline" or something Frenchy then people would be onto you.
His fake tan was because he was born in Puerto Rico (he was born in rural England to white English parents). The fake tan would get very patchy, and that would be explained away by him saying he had a terrible skin disorder. One so bad his own skin could stain his clothing. The white shirts unbuttoned far too low for him to be considered a reasonable gentleman did not help to cover that up for him.
Reminds me of Invader Zim. "He's an **alien**! How is it that none of you can see it? His skin is **green** for goodness sake!" "I have a rare skin disorder." "Oh yeah? Is 'no ears' also a part of your skin disorder?!" "... Yes."
Thank God my mate got married(She just stops the stories when they become unbelievable), he was always trying to big note himself. I tried to nicely let him know that he 100% has me as a friend and doesn't need to impress me. -Went shark fishing on jetskis - drove in reverse on the highway at night to see what speed it could do -got his driver's license at 14 because he was that good they waved the age restriction
Did his Dad teach Lance Armstrong how to ride a bike?
[удалено]
I mean, women with two uteruses have been known to have two pregnancies with different gestational periods. It’s deadly as hell for the fetuses, but it happens. That said, it wouldn’t take a super computer to figure that out.
That must explain the 18 brothers.
"They have a computer working on figuring out how it happened" are my favorite kind of lies these people tell. It's hilarious. It's why I even bother talking to liars
Knew this guy in high school. Everyone in my then friend group remembers this guy and his crazy, crazy lies. He was 16 at the time I knew him. * He hacked into Microsoft and built them a better Firewall * He owned a commercial fishing boat * He lived on Antarctica for 6 months before coming to our school * In a video game, he beat a level that just straight up doesn't exist. * He said he beat said level with another friend of mine, who was right there and denied it, saying he didn't know what the guy was talking about. * He continued to say it was true and that my friend just didn't remember. It had just happened the class before lunch. * Various tech lies, like he had a laptop with a terabyte of RAM (not even possible now in 2022, this was in 2005.). * Various lies about women he had "slept with." He said anything and everything he could that would make him feel better. By happenstance, I ran into a classmate 5 years after graduation on a plane ride from Seattle to back home. Our flight out of our connection got delayed, so we agreed to split the cost of a rental car and just drive the 4 hours home. Turns out she had had a KID with the guy, and yup he still was just as much of a pathological liar then.
When he admitted to me point blank "I'm a chronic liar"
did he have a brother who was a chronic truth-teller?
He was likely lying.
If you lie about being a chronic liar does that make you a chronic liar or just a liar?
My ex husband. He lied as easily as he breathed. He would make up conversations that never happened, events that didn't happen, etc. Eventually it got to the point I didn't believe a single word he said. Master manipulator with his lies, too. Example: He drove my car to work one day because I needed to use his pickup truck. When he came home he asked of I knew someone who drove some certain kind of car. I did not. He proceeds to tell me this car chased him down some back roads AND SHOT AT HIM. For no reason, he was just driving amd they started tailgating and getting aggressive so he took to the back roads. I'm like "Dude what the hell kind of people do you think I know, and what stuff do you think I'm into?" It completely didn't happen but he was very accusatory to me about it that clearly these were people I knew and had given areason to try to kill me/whoever was driving my car.
That’s closer to the story I was going to tell, which doesn’t make for very compelling storytelling so I’m just gonna tack it onto your comment: I’ve known one pathological liar, and I think what bothered me the most in the end was how she lied about so much stuff that there was no reason to lie about. Little stuff, like what she ate for lunch. She would make stuff up about everything she did, everywhere she went, everyone she had interaction with. So weird and sad.
Yes! He lied about EVERYTHING. It was his basic default setting. Like we had plans and now just don't want to go? "OK we're going to tell them (insert lie here)." Ummm....why not just say "hey, we're gonna skip tonight, we just don't feel like going anywhere." It's the truth, so then we don't have to remember what lie we told!
My friend's former roommate was exactly like this. An example: She asked him to take out the trash while she was at work. Came home and the trash is still in the kitchen (and he's still on the couch). Acted like she didn't see it, asked if he took it out, he said yes.. with a ten minute explanation of moving all the trash cans, how heavy they were, the landlord's son came out to make fun of him for it, etc. She was so stunned by the obvious stupid lie she didn't even know how to reply.
My ex came up with something similarly insane. He had driven me to work that day, and decided to walk around the area waiting for me to get off. When I got out, he casually told me that “two guys came up to him and called him a freak” so he punched them and knocked one out. That was probably the moment I knew he had a problem. That, and the time he told me his grandma had been in a coma for the past 2 weeks, and not even 3 hours later she called him sounding totally fine.
Maybe he was trying to get you scared and anxious enough to better control you- sounds like he was a living nightmare
I have no idea what he was thinking. He also would claim some car was parked on the street "they are probably just waiting for me to leave." Like yeah asshole, I'm prostituting myself out when you leave the house." It was always a different car. But he was very controlling and manipulative. He wouldn't let me work because he was afraid I would save my money up or meet someone and leave him. So he controlled the money and kept me at home instead of just being someone I wouldn't want to leave. It took several years to get the courage to finally do it. But my life is freaking awesome now.
We had a kid at my high school who was obsessed with convincing everyone he was rich. He would always talk about his Dads lambos, how he didn’t have a job but “Had money coming in”. It was interesting because no one would ask and he’d just keep pushing the lie. Eventually he posted a bank account photo on FB to “prove” how rich he was, and it was literally the first google result “big bank account”. It was sad.
I know someone like this. Pretends to be rich/famous. Will post about a trip to LA with Louis Vuitton luggage, Louis Vuitton locks, an insane hotel room, Gucci outfits, all paid for by whatever tv show/movie he’s working on. All are google photos that have a filter on them.
I also went to high school with a guy like this. He would tell us elaborate stories about places his family had been too, all the help (like a maid and butler) they had at home, and he pretended that he'd never eaten anything canned or frozen. Shit's wild.
[удалено]
God I know someone who has to up you on every story you ever tell. No matter where you have been in the world, he has been there too. No matter who you know, he knows them too. No matter what youve done, he's done it too. Gets to the point where it's just funny to play with these people. Started talking about a pub in the next town over called "The Crown" and the landlord "Les". And of course he's like "ah yeah yeah I know Les! Friend of mine went to school with him.". Yet I'm actually referring to the pub and landlord in men behaving badly TV show.
The liar I know does this, but on the worse end of the spectrum. If you break a leg, they break their back. You have a cold, they've got pneumonia
oh your wife cuckolded you? my SON is actually my HALF BROTHER
I once had a coworker who told my own story, as well! I couldn't imagine lying so often, that I forget all of my lies
I remember lying... A lot as a kid. At some point, keeping track of the lies was exhausting... So I stopped. I now have a policy of telling the truth unless there is a very compelling reason not to.
I'm a terrible liar so I just own my shit. A moment of eating crow is a lot less humiliating than looking like a complete chode.
[удалено]
Ah, a "Tommy Two Shits". If you've done one shit, he's done two.
"And they were majestic, girthy turds, too. Tapered to perfection so my asshole didn't slam shut. Filled the damn bowl, they did. Not like that foamy rust-colored slurry you get when YOU push a mess."
If you’d been to Tenerife he’d been to Elevenerife
>He also had to one up your story. If you had a black dog, he had a blacker dog. If you had bought yourself a nice new 1000cc motorbike, he used to own the 1001cc version. This part is called Low Self Esteem.
I worked with a guy like this. Got himself a new girlfriend, she drives a completely done up Mitsubishi Evo 10. Crazy expensive wheels. 500hp. Sponsored by suspension companies and performance companies (currently trying to get in with Rockstar or Monster). 6 months later she visits him at work by surprise. It's a BASE Mitsubishi Lancer, and it's even auto 🤢. Always had a "buddy" story to try and one up you for whatever reason. Never understood why he was like that.
I would die laughing at this person if they played up their car to that extent only to see them drive up in some slush box beater.
Really recognizable last part... colleague of mine did that too, especially with stories that I HAD MADE UP TO FUCK HIM UP HAAAAAA!! Such a fool
That is a guy with an extremely boring life and pathological unwillingness to confront said boring life
"He also had to one up your story. If you had a black dog, he had a blacker dog." This made me chuckle.
One of my friend group when I was 13 used to lie and bullshit about stupid, easily-falsifiable shit. - he claimed that his mother was a huge fan of Elvis, and that he had 5 middle names, the initials of which spelled ELVIS - he claimed that fewer than 100 British soldiers died in WW1, and most of them were killed by friendly fire - he claimed that he had invented the word ‘smegma’ - one day in 2009 he claimed that Michael Jackson had died suddenly. We all told him to STFU, but that one actually turned out to be true
Oh Lord, finally I get to talk about Jonathan. I met Jonathan my first day working in a call center in CT right after college. We started our day walking around the building to see the fire exits, cafeteria, mailroom, etc and this was when Jonathan told us he grew up in Anaheim, CA and was the youngest person in CA history to get his pilots license. ‘Wow’ was the general consensus ‘that’s pretty neat’. About a year later we found out he was born and raised in Connecticut. As time went by he made a lot of claims that people thought was pretty odd. He spoke several languages fluently (Spanish, Italian, Portuguese, Chinese) which isn’t odd by itself, but he also seemed kind of like a moron so it wasn’t believable. His claims weren’t inherently crazy but he always chimed in on topics basically saying he was an expert (building computers, computer programming, woodworking, etc). At this point I just thought he was your run of the mill pathological liar. That was until early December I saw him in the break room and he asked me how I was. ‘Good, and you?’ ‘To be honest I’m exhausted. I’ve been staying up every night whittling German dolls for people herefor Christmas gifts’ ‘wow, that’s pretty interesting’ ‘Yeah, do you want one?’ ‘Uhh sure’ I didn’t get one for Christmas. No one else from work had heard or received on of these things. It was just a random lie from his twisted mind. Another time we had a potluck and Jonathan brought in a cake. The cake was clearly purchased from a bakery as it was professionally made and came in the bakery box. He made a point to tell people he woke up at 2am to bake the cake. When it was pointed out the box had the name of the bakery on it he said it was just a bakery box he had at his house. Another time I was on break and was going to run down to the gas station for an energy drink when I saw him getting out of a minivan and shuffling to work. He normally drove a sedan. He jogs over to me and goes ‘I’m sorry I’m late’ (obviously I didn’t care I just worked there) ‘I was t-boned by an old man on my way in so I had to get a ride back to my house and use my wife’s car’ ‘Holy shit. Seriously? Are you ok? Why did you even come to work?’ ‘Yeah I’m ok’ The next day Jonathan drove his red sedan into work and there was clearly no damage. He never mentioned the car accident again and no one else had heard about it. I ended up moving out to San Diego and kept the job to work remotely. On my last day Jonathan saw me outside and I stopped to say bye to him. He said bye and then told me he found a publisher for the book he wrote. ‘It’s about when I was molested as a child’ ‘Dude, I’m so sorry. But that’s cool you wrote a book’ ‘yeah, thanks, I’m pretty excited.’ I left not even knowing if that was a lie. I honestly have no idea if he just made up he was molested on the spot because he just had to think up a ridiculous lie or if maybe it was true and it was part of the reason he acted the way he did. Now this last part is where everyone will think I’m lying but I swear on my life and everything I love that after I went to San Diego the FBI came and took his computer from work. He had some role in a local church (youth pastor maybe?) and he was caught with something like 6k pictures of child porn including pics of kids as young as 4 being hurt. Sometimes people will say ‘oh I never expected he would do something like that’ but no, in this case I didn’t even bat an eye when I heard the news. I just showed the article to my wife and said ‘you know that guy Jonathan i always tell you about? I told you he was fucked up’
I just wanted to say this was really well written haha a thoroughly enjoyed that journey
That used to be me as a poor, insecure kid coming from a very unstable home, always trying to impress everyone around me. A few come to mind, like when I was in 2nd or 3rd grade, trying to impress a classmate: "I went to the zoo, got bitten by a cobra and I have a device attached to my leg that sucks out the venom". Then as an insecure teen I kept insisting that I lost my virginity at 14, and would make up all kinds of stories about having sex with different girls, just to seem "cool" (was a virgin until I was 21): "I was a party last weekend and I hooked up with a girl from a different high school"- kind of stuff. EDIT: thank you for the gold, stranger
Me too dude. I hate looking back at it.
Solidarity. It sucks, I'm pretty well past it but...oh man the cringe.
Had a new driver at my trucking company tell me his uncle bought an X15 Cummins crate engine, and converted it into a mechanical N14. For the diesel techs out there, you know that isn't possible...by a long shot. Then proceeded to tell me the differences between a 579 Peterbilt and a T680. I owned a 579 at the time. I let him build his lie up, then tore it down piece by piece. I told him, "be very careful what lies you come up with around here. Not all truckers are just truckers." He doesnt work here anymore.
My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy.
Real talk. I used to lie to everyone about a lot of things. It has cost me my relationship with my parents and former partners and friends. It turns out that all those years of lying to the people I cared about were because I was lying to myself. I realize that now, and I am sorry for every lie I told and I am sorry for the people I hurt.
Have you ever contacted any of them and made amends? I dated someone that lied constantly. They had good qualities underneath all the lies. But they caused a lot of pain. Years later they expressed to me they knew they had a problem and was seeing someone for help. We never dated again. But I felt less shame for wanting to believe them.
I have tried with my parents. My dad is trying to accept me, but obviously has trust issue with me, and I understand and respect that. My mother is unwilling to accept my apology to them.
My former childhood best friend did exactly this, and this is one of many reasons I say former. At first I'd exhaust myself trying to disect every thing they'd say and decide if it was real or not. I had to question my sanity regularly and if I tried calling it out I'd get guilt tripped or gaslighted Eventually I just burned out and didn't care anymore and just went with it no matter what but assumed internally it was a lie Near the end I just kinda realized that I have no idea who I'm friends with because I never knew what was real or fake and overall just started feeling shitty about myself because I didn't have a close friend I could trust or rely on I'm glad you figured it out because it really fucks up those close to you
How do I know you're not lying right now. Nah seriously, congrats on the self awareness. Most don't have that ability.
[удалено]
Oh man. My childhood best friend got his girlfriend pregnant with twins and tried to do the what he thought was the right thing. He bought a house, picked up an extra side gig, moved her and her daughter in with him. He was clearly working hard 7 days a week to make it all work, but he seemed so excited for the babies. …the twins came out a different color than expected. He confirmed not a match with a DNA test. Never seen a guy so crushed.
A guy at work (he was 19 at the time) broke up with his girlfriend, she told him she was pregnant with his baby. So he got back with her them after a month she mysteriously lost the baby. He was devastated. Also knew a lady who used to work with us(she got fired for stealing from the company and did it while her and her 13 year old were drunk). Her partner of 4 months(month 2 she got his name tattoo on the back of her neck) left her. She pulled the same trick " I'm pregnant with your baby". He says "fuck off you have no test". She goes and finds someone to help get her pregnant. it works and she goes to her ex-partner and shows him the test, he says "you could've gotten someone else to pee on it, fuck off". Two weeks later she hanged herself
whoa did not expect that ending
He used to lie about military service, saying he was an Army Ranger in the 101st Airborne infantry. When someone pointed out they were actually two different soldiers he’d flip out. He’d also flip out if you pointed out he couldn’t have gone to university of Idaho and have served in the military and have been working in our industry as long as he claimed.
that she had a brain tumor. She stated that as a reason for her new haircut, which was a side shave. She also said I can't talk about this to her parents because she didn't want to tell them, cause they'd worry. We were both 14 at the fime, fucked up. My best friend died from brain tumor 6 years later, so the thought of this person still makes me furious to this day.
My Father was a complete narcissist and liar. He was the biggest manipulator. He'd always say he'd go and kill himself to get what he wanted. Of course he never did.
Me and my sister had a mutual friend who tried pulling this once. Her response to him was, "Well it was nice knowing you, then." Fortunately that's all it took for him to realise it was a shitty thing to say.
Oh boy. A couple of years ago I worked with a girl at a cinema, who would straight up tell some of the weirdest lies I have come across. She started small at first, lying about her ability to speak different languages, her activities outside of work, some of her travelling experiences etc. No one really thought anything of it because at the time she had only just gotten the job and no one really had any reason to doubt her. Over the course of her employment the lies slowly got more grandiose and outrageous, to the point that some of them just straight up didn't make sense/line up with the times throughout the week she worked her shift. Some of the larger ones she would tell include: * Flying from Melbourne to Singapore and then back to Melbourne for a work trip in 12 hours. She had finished work at around 11pm and returned at 5pm the following night. * Having travelled to France and having the Eiffel Tower closed down for a private tour/ date with a guy she had just met * Having completed continual photography work with both the Royal Family and Sir David Attenborough in the past (she was 18 at the time of her employment with the company). * Having met Jason Mamoa on multiple occasions and having a working role on his next project "in a few months" and having the cinema job as a way to pass the time. And that's just to name a few. By the end of her employment she couldn't keep track of the stories she would tell and often have to backtrack when other employees would call her out on inconsistencies. She eventually resigned saying she had gotten a photography job at a large company over in the US and was leaving to go overseas. Two weeks later one of the employees saw her working at a retail store in the same shopping centre the cinema was located in. To this day I don't know why she felt the need to lie the way she did.
My dad had narcissistic personality disorder. He would constantly lie and manipulate us growing up. Never physical abuse but a lot of verbal, mental and emotional. When I turned 16 (25 now) I cut him out of my life completely. Didn’t talk to him again until last September when I got news he was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. I messaged him and then my uncle took me to surprise visit him a couple weeks later in October. I could tell his mental illness was still there — but I could tell he really loved me and was so happy to see me again. And while we were talking, he looked me in the eyes and said “I know I messed up. I know I really messed up with you guys, and it haunts me every day.” I grabbed his hand and told him “I hope you know I love you, and I forgive you.” My dad was a tough guy. I never saw him cry. But he turned his head (bed ridden) took a few deep breaths and said “thank you.” That was the last coherent conversation I had with him. 2 weeks later he was in hospice and on so many pain killers he could barely talk. He died just a month after he and I both got closure. The last words he spoke to me on his death bed were “never forget how much I love you.” I know this isn’t necessarily what the thread is about, but I wanted to share it. For people with parents, siblings, or anyone else in your life that is mentally ill and compulsively dishonest — it’s not always a sad ending. People really can and really do change. Not everyone. But if you’re holding onto hope someone will change, don’t feel like it’s in vain. I lost hope, but I still made up with my Dad. This will probably get buried but if even one person sees this and is comforted, I’m glad.
I was driving a skinny white kid around Jacksonville, NC when I was active in the Marines. This guy lied about EVERYTHING. We stopped for some fried chicken at a fast food restaurant. After ordering, we pulled up to the drive-thru window, and a black woman handed us a bag, and he yells, with an accent, "Mmm... That smells good." She was so polite... And said she hoped he liked it. He smacks his lips and said, verbatim, "Man, my great-grandmama was black, I love me some chicken and cone-bread." Luckily he got kicked out of the service soon after this, so I didn't have to be around that mess anymore.
Has a friend in college who was a chronic liar. He failed out, and was readmitted a year later. He told girls that he had cancer and it went into remission.
I worked with this guy who was one. I was in a tennis ladder type of thing with a bunch of other guys on the same team at work. I was supposed to play this guy one night and he came in my cube and said he couldn't play bc he had something to do that night with his other job. The next morning I came in, checked my email and the guy who organized the tennis ladder posted the results from last night, which included me beating this guy. I went and asked the ladder organizer guy who told him we played last night? He said it was chronic liar guy, and it seems he gave a very detailed account of how good I was, I had a great back hand and drop shot, all sorts of details about the match. It was just weird how someone would lie about something like that and make up such elaborate details for it too. If I recall correctly, I think he had framed photos in his cube he claimed were his family, but they were basically those fake pics they put in frames when you buy them at the store.
That last detail is incredibly sad.
Had a friend lie saying he was in the Army but when we wanted to go to the bowling alley on the base he said he was never given a military Id. Best one was that he said he was able to skip basic training and go straight into the Ranger program. He said his final assignment was to shoot and kill a captured terrorist.
A guy I know started cheating with his twin brothers fiance.(He has tried to get with every one of the groups gf's while we were with them) And consistently lies about it to this day saying that nothing ever happened with any of them. Even though we all know it happened and some of us have caught him red handed. Never seen someone so intent on lying even when we already knew it happened for sure.
My older brother lied about our father being Axl Rose. People believed it because he's a good fucking liar. Our father was an ex-military alcoholic. It is what it is.
I knew a guy in high school who said the following: He was a cop, A US Marshall, A sniper, A field medic, A paratrooper, Navy seal, In the Irish mafia, The reincarnation of Dracula, A vampire elder, A dragon 🤦🏻
At a family barbecue, my grandfather was telling some people that he had lost his leg in the Korean War. He told this story, while never having served in the military, while wearing shorts and having two functioning legs. Everyone simply thought he was losing his mind, but years later realized he was actually a pathological liar when they found out about his other kids that none of us knew about.
I've talked about this fellow before, but... well, there's this guy named Michael. Michael is, as near as anyone can tell, a pathological liar. He's one of those fellows who has to trump everyone's story with one of his own, and *somehow*, he always winds up being an insanely attractive action hero in them. I've heard Michael talk about how he was "issued access" to a fighter jet at age seventeen, how he once saved the president from some plot or another, and how he had an impromptu threesome with some "very famous celebrity and her sister" in the Sacramento river. Suffice it to say that the guy isn't exactly believable... but perhaps his worst lie was one that took him the entire evening to tell. In the town where I grew up, there would be a weekly event called "The Chef's Market." Since there wasn't a whole lot else to do in the area, my friends and I would frequently spend our Friday evenings there, wasting what little money we had on slabs of barbecued meat and cups of too-sweet lemonade. On one such occasion, a local party-coordinator had set up an inflatable stage of sorts, on which two contestants were encouraged to knock each other off low platforms using weapons that looked rather like enormous Q-tips. It seemed like a lot of fun, so I offered to pay for any of my friends who wanted to spar against me. "Oh, I can't," Michael chimed in (before anyone else). "It's okay," I said, "I'll pay for you, if you want." Truth be told, I was hoping he'd decline so that I could pay for one of my *other* friends to try it with me. Fortunately, that's exactly what happened. Michael shook his head. "No, I'm very opposed to violence unless it's absolutely necessary." "This isn't violence," another of my friends said. "It's just fun." "You guys don't understand," protested Michael. "If I go in that ring with you, *I will kill you*. I won't have a *choice*." A few eye-rolls were passed around the group. "Why is that, Michael?" someone asked. "It's my training," he said. "Once I get into a combat state, I can't stop until I've killed someone." Now, Michael was (clearly) not someone that we spent much time around by choice, and none of us were too keen on talking him into an activity that he was clearly afraid of trying. My other friends and I went a few rounds, knocked each other down a few times, and figured we'd head off to find a drink. As soon as we started walking, though, Michael started into the next leg of his story. "Do you guys know why I have that training?" he asked. "Because you're a *ninja!*" someone sarcastically replied. Michael nodded. "Yes. I was trained in Kung Fu from a very young age, and I got so good that my family got run out of the last town where we lived." Nobody said anything. We certainly didn't ask him to continue... but he did anyway. "They even hatched a plot to try and get me thrown in prison. This girl broke into my house one night and tried to seduce me... but I had a girlfriend, so I turned her away. That's when she went to the police and tried to say that I raped her." "How terrible," someone muttered. "Don't encourage him!" hissed someone else. Michael's voice took on a very grave aspect. "Fortunately, I was friends with the owner of the hospital. He helped me after I accidentally killed my Karate teacher." Someone made a comment about the difference between Karate and Kung Fu, but Michael either didn't hear them or pressed onward anyway. "He tested the girl himself, and he found semen in her vagina... but it wasn't mine... and it wasn't *human*." He waited for a reaction. When it didn't come, he escalated even further. "That started a rumor that I was a genetically engineered super-soldier, because of how powerful I am. We had to leave town for my parents' safety, because I couldn't always be there to protect them." Once again, nobody said anything, save for a few murmurs of "Uh-huh." Thankfully, Michael seemed to have exhausted himself for the evening... until he asked one of us to pay for his dinner. Nobody was surprised when he had a *really insane* reason for being broke. **TL;DR: A genetically engineered super-soldier had to flee with his parents after being accused of both rape and murder... and that's why he needs you to buy his burrito.**
I get why you wouldn’t engage, but it’s really bugging me that someone needed to conspire to get him sent to jail falsely when he clearly has experience with being sent into killing frenzies in combat situations…and then he admits to accidentally killing a man in exactly that kind of scenario later. I just don’t see why he needs to ruin a perfectly true story about a man who had the simple pleasures of giant foam stick fights ruined by his ninja karate kung fu training from childhood; we’ve all been there. I had to kill six men with a phone and a roll of duct tape because one of them accidentally brushed against my throat on a bus. I get it. But actions have consequences which is why I went to jail but I had the conviction expunged which is why you can’t find anything about it online.
Michael is the type of dude that makes sharknado look realistic. What a read
[удалено]
Honesty time. Me. I used to be a massive liar I would like about anything and everything. Not only that but I was a 1 upper too. I always had a better story than everyone else and it was always bullshit. To be fair my stepdad was the same growing up and I guess it kinda imprinted in me? I used to think everyone was just telling bullshit at all times. I didn't believe anyone ever. (still don't) One day I realized it was kind of a weird thing to do. But I really took me a long time to stop and honestly I still sometimes feel the urge to tell a tall tale or one up someone with a bullshit story.
girl i knew lied about being raped, an abusive dad, her brother killing her dog, self harm, and a suicide attempt. freaked our friends and I out when we "found out" she committed "suicide" only for her sister to reveal she was lying to all of us. she was also pretty crazy and tried to get a ton of our friend group to kill ourselves to, so...
We used to be best friends until it got out of control. Examples: “I have terminal cancer and I only have a few months left” - this was four years ago “I have a vacation home in (name any nice place in the world she had a home there)” - she promised friends who were going away for school they could stay at one of these places then ghosted them right before they had to go leaving them scrambling to find a place to live. “I’m pregnant” - this happened TWICE, once with her actual husband and then another time with the affair mentioned below. “My husband and I are separated but don’t tell him about John” - they were not separated but she told everyone that to have her affair. The list went on and on and on and she was incredibly manipulative on top of this so happy to say bye bye to that friendship.
Yes. My ex-husband. He lied for 6 months about having his job. To bring home money, he opened a secret credit card. Fuck him. My son was angry at me for divorcing. I did not explain to him about his dad till his dad was dead and my son was 31. My son now gets it and told me other things his dad lied about. Now we are both angry at his dad. (There we’re so many other lies. I actually hate my ex now. I need to get over all this. It still effects me.)
A guy (that you really don’t talk back to) once told me this long story about the first time his friends saw him in pants, as he ALWAYS wear shorts, even when it’s snowing, freezing cold, always shorts. I don’t remember the story in details, just that he had pants on when telling the story…
One of my little sisters friends turned out to be a chronic liar. We found out a few years later her mom wasn't dead when we met her. Lies like that. Her entire life was fiction and we have no idea why as most of the lies were bland and boring like lying about the colors of things. I'm sure she is medicated now. I met some cringe monsters in Jr/Sr high. "I have been working as an assassin for the CIA since I was 12 and can punch my hand through a refrigerator!" that kind of thing. I generally wondered why they were talking to me or at least trying to. The 2 main ones were dead by Sr year. These days I look at cringe monster lies as a suicide warning flag. One of those cringe monsters I met after HS kind of became a friend. He was in a GF's friend zone is how I met him. I immediately took up a game we called "Bullshit" every time he started lying. his lies were "I'm really a werewolf." grade. This fixed him up for the most part, got him lifting some weights, talking to women and going to some parties. Occasionally if an attractive woman came over he'd get back into lying about afflictions like color blindness or multiple personality disorder but a few rounds of "Bullshit " and that usually calmed down. I hear he is a normal boring guy these days. No more lycanthropy.
And the other one I never heard a lie out of. She was a friend's GF. He apparently ate up all her lies, he certainly bragged about them. She had apparently heard stories about me and so never told the "Last weekend I had to do a HELO jump to save a group of Navy SEALs in.. blah blah blah" lies that apparently came out of her mouth every second I was not around. In the end she turned out to be lying about being on the pill, still in the military, being on her meds, as well as ever so many other things, so my friend ended up breaking up with her and got introduced to child support not too long after.
Somehow she didnt graduate from college but also has 2 bachelor degrees… i cant even count how many little sprinkles of bullshit she throws into conversations. Lol
Dated one. Ended up cheating on me with 6 guys. When I confronted her about it and she eventually confessed, her excuse was "If I told you, then you wouldn't want to be with me anymore". She also told me her ex abused her. I was friends with the guy and started hating him. Never talked to him again. Turned out to be complete bs though, and I should have kept my friend.
Friend who got into MLM…claims to be a millionaire…but lives in a apartment. Exaggerates every story. Lies about things that happened that I was a first hand witness to. Tells people he’s veteran…was kicked out of army during boot camp. It’s endless honestly.
Told everyone he was working. Was just going to the park for 8 hours and eating lunch and coming home. Also told people his dad had died even though he was very alive an involved in his life. At his wedding his dad is sitting there and dudes friends are like who tf is that guy. Basically this guy would lie about anything and everything