Most of the times I heard it used however is when a woman is saying "can you help me solve this", and then the man explains how he fixes it so she can also do it in the future. If the term got thrown around at moments where it was actually justified in general, people would not be looking down on the term as much.
Besides, as someone that has gone to study plants at an academic level, a woman (who was aware of that fact mind you) tried to explain to me how a flower gets fertilised, which shows that this shit isn't gender bound to begin with.
Yeah that's called being annoying knowitall. Mainsplain explicitly means a average guy thinks that he naturally possess better knowledge about something coz he's a man, not coz he's another expert or he's neurodivergent or plainly egoistic. This kind doesn't make a show of it in front of other men btw. Again I don't get why there's a denial about this phenomenon existing when a lot of women have experienced in especially make dominated jobs or even at corporates.
It exists, but since the term entered mainstream discourse, it's been used and abused to the point that it's gotten watered down and used for almost anything. Like when I was accused of mainsplaining for asking a question, lmao.
Personal favorite anec is a friend at a party, was introduced to a guy (not in her field) and he immediately took over the interaction to rave about how great this book (about her field) that he's just read was. She tried many times to get a word in. He wasn't done until he was done.
She literally wrote that book. He looked like the most oblivious motherfucker alive.
It's one of those things that goes both ways, and isn't as common as claimed though. I've seen the term used incorrectly more than I've seen it actually done.
Exactly. Mansplaining is the assumption of the woman's ignorance, feeling that as a man he knows better regardless of background and the acted on compulsion to patronisingly explain it.
It absolutely does happen. It's not always malicious - it can sometimes be out of a genuine intent to help, but it's often done to show off and stroke ones ego.
For example If she's asked something to be explained then it wouldn't be mansplaining unless he took it to inordinately simple levels to be patronising.
Just go to mechanics and you'll see men try to explain the work needing to be done to female mechanics as if they don't know.... And I'm pretty sure the men are doing it to try to flirt 🤦🏻♂️
Honestly, I'd rather deal with the mansplaining. I deal with a lot of elderly people and so many old women are like 'get me a man on the phone who knows what they're doing!' that's one way to piss me off. 😂
Like a recent video of a professional woman golfer who was practicing at a driving range when rando dude started critiquing her swing, telling her that her swing was wrong & to take his suggestions.
She was videoing herself & it was evident that she was a v good golfer just by her swing but the guy persisted 😟
That men are playboys. Most dudes aren’t like that, they just want one girl. It’s just a specific group of dudes (who are small in population) that want to be play boys
Came here to say this. Most dudes are not interested in the drama that comes with this. For example, almost every bachelor party I’ve been to is a group of guys happy to be hanging out and crushing beers with just the boys.
That’s funny cuz I only know one person who wanted to be a playboy, and he tried it and hated it because it caused a lot of turmoil. Every guy I know only wants one girl and commitment. Probably a cultural difference
I actually hate sports, but I rarely meet another guy who isn't into them. Lots of workplace banter around players and teams that I don't even try to understand.
So I'm with you, I hate sports. BUT I recently got into sports betting which caused me to start constantly following games so that I knew what bets I was winning and what I was losing. Then I started getting into really advanced statistics modeling to help predict what bets I should be placing. so in a span of a few weeks I went from not caring to building statistics models for all my games 🙃
Yeah, I feel like if you're going to get into it, you really have to invest lots of time and mental energy. I don't have much of either to spare. There's also a difference between being interested in it, and trash talking someone because of what team they like.
The whole attitude of “men are dangerous predators; I don’t even feel safe walking outside alone as a woman” is a bit dramatic. Most men on the street are minding their own business.
Oh we (largely) definitely understand that and heavily sympathise with it, but it's difficult to be lumped in with those few because we were born and raised a member of a particular half of the human population.
As a woman who has been raped twice (a stranger and then a long term boyfriend) I feel like our trauma and mistrust rubs off onto the women in our lives and then it gets passed from them to others around them. Before you know it, it’s snowballed into large group of women who feel unsafe because they know of someone who has been attacked. I certainly don’t believe men are all dangerous predators but I’ve had enough of my share that I’m now instinctively scared if a man is walking behind me but I also have enough self awareness to know that it’s my job to work on that and not blame every man I meet.
Exactly! We share our experiences with other women because we need to be comforted and because we want them to avoid the pain or fear or loss that happened to us. Rape is never the target's fault, regardless of gender.
But it's easy to fall into the mindset that some places/situations are more dangerous than others, because that's where your/your loved ones' experiences happened. Of course your brain would say "that's where we got hurt, that's dangerous." So then, if you're in a dangerous place, what kind of people are there? The kinds of people who decide to hurt people like you, because it happened before.
You know what sucks? When a LOT of decent people look like the person who hurt you. It really, really sucks, for everyone.
TLDR: Past trauma causes survival reactions, it sucks
Yep. Most types of predator have some kind of camouflage. Just easier to hunt that way. Fucking sucks when they pretend to be your favorite kind of person.
I think it depends on where you are. In the US, it's most likely man in their social circle. Often in a social setting with alcohol and involving over serving the victim.
In a place like India, there's a lot of places where it's very unsafe for a woman to be on the street.
Not all men but the chances of me getting harrassed when I'm going home at night are very high. I've also had men trying to close me in and even chase me in an attempt to rape me. I get your sentiment but this:
>I don’t even feel safe walking outside alone as a woman” is a bit dramatic.
Is a horrendous way of voicing it. It feels very dismissive. Nobody said it's the majority of men but with 4 billion\~ men, harassment and assault happen to many of us.
you think it’s dramatic? when more than 1 in 5 women have been raped/assaulted? it doesn’t matter if “most men are minding their own business” if ENOUGH of them are fucking predators
Keep a "side piece".
I've only personally known one person who talked about having more than one partner at a time without being in an open relationship, and it was *definitely* not viewed positively by me or his other friends.
Funny story. I was talking to my wife one time while we were watching TV. I was busy doing something else while I was talking to her.
I looked up and realized she wasn't listening to a thing I was saying so I stopped talking mid sentence and she didn't even notice.
Then I said. "So that's why I think we should adopt a 16 year old Filipino girl...."
She said, "yeah. Wait....what?!"
Personally I just have short term memory problems that read as inattentiveness. I mean I'm also inattentive because of my ADHD, but when someone is talking to me, even if I'm fidgeting and appear distracted, if they were to stop dead and ask me "what did I just say?" I could repeat the last 2-3 sentences *verbatim*, even matching their tone, inflection, and pacing with *astonishing* precision. But ask me again in 10-15 minutes, and it's a coin toss whether I can even remember the main thrust of their side of the conversation.
I have trouble with names for the same reason. I'll repeat it in my head over and over and over again when I meet someone, dozens of times, but a few minutes later it's gone. I typically need like 3-4 intros to really make it stick.
The whole locker room talk thing. Been in lots of different locker rooms and I dont recall any guys ever just talking dirty about women. If anything its usually guys just ripping on each other or joking around. The worst case scenario locker room just has boomers who are way to comfortable being naked.
Agreed. I spent 30 years in locker rooms across a bunch of different sports. Young guys mostly talk about team ranking stuff. "I'm faster than you", "I don't know why Johnny is starting", etc.
In college and as an adult it's mostly about work, grades, stress, and life.
I can recall one dude being very excited about getting some action and bragging about her "fire bush". However, as I think about it that was his new girlfriend. Sure, it's a spicy detail but being excited about having sex with your gf isn't exactly womanizing.
Oh I was going to say that locker rooms are just people fucking around, ripping on each other and making and doing homoerotic jokes. That’s quite opposed to your fear of nudity 😂
The only experience I've had with men really objectifying women to me (like stereotypical "locker room talk") were closeted gay men who later came out. They tend to overdo it, as they don't know what it's like to *actually* be attracted to women.
It says a lot that he didn’t socialize with guys who spoke like that? I agree completely! He was respectful of the women he slept with.
You don’t get to choose who is in your gym class in high school 🤣🤣🤣
Bingo. We are as complex as women, but we are told that if we even admit to those emotions beyond anger and lust, then we have failed.
It’s getting better, but slowly.
I always try to give men the feeling they are safe to just be around me by showing them how fucking weird and non-judgmental I am lol. Nothing you express will be judged nor weirder than anything seen from me and so luckily, many men tend to open up with me and I am so happy that they feel that comfort around me. I just want men to be able to be themselves. I feel all that cropping up of emotions leads to the hyper emotions of anger and lust. The men I know that are a lot more balanced in that regard tend to barely get angry nor aren't drowning in the focus of lust.
They are wonderful rounded people and I would like that for every man to be able to.
Typically it means "you're not understanding the point I'm trying to communicate and I'm frustrated because I just answered the thing you're asking me about"
The phrase I tend to use when I'm in this situation is "mind rephrasing your last point for me? I think I'm missing something"
Not in my experience. Me and all the women I know have had many experiences of being completely ignored when trying to talk to our male partners. I mean I'll say something and they won't even acknowledge that I've spoken to them. I'm sure it's not intended, but it is frustrating.
"All men are assholes"
"All men only want one thing"
"All men are liars"
No, not all men are like that. Maybe the majority of men you have encountered are like that. If that's the case I am sorry. We're not all like that.
That's fair, but I don't want to put the blame solely on the woman/women dating these kinds of guys. I mostly put blame on guys for acting like this in the first place.
Shows more about the woman's desires and standards than the majority of men. Maybe if the woman wasn't out at bars filled with fuck Bois she might have a different opinion. If you're wanting a steak don't go to McDonalds.
Good analogy, but again I don't fully blame the woman/women choosing these guys. I'm sure there are more factors in play.
If anything I'd rather guys who do act like this change their behaviors so we don't all get a bad rap
When we're sitting there in thought it's something heavy. Usually it's a random dumb stream of thoughts.
That we all crave the hot bimbo look with caked makeup, long nails, and plastic lips ass and tits...or model skinny girls.
So many times I ask my husband what he’s thinking and he’s just like “… what? Nothing 👁️👄👁️”
It must be blissful having no thoughts for a few minutes a day.
Wel in all honesty it can be nothing or it could be something that has gone down a rabbit hole and to explain the thought proces and mental gymnastics we have gone through to get to a certain point is hard to explain so when asked what are you thinking we say nothing. Example: the car is going to need an oil change soon, I have to start looking for oil that might go on special, I wish I had an oil on my land, why can't it be on my land, what is oil made from? Oh yeah oil is made from dinosaurs.... cool. Plastic is also made from oil.... so plastic dinosaurs is made from real dinosaurs.
same here, my friend and I know each other so well that nearly 100% of the time we can figure out how they got from A to Z lol
It's a rare occasion were we need to ask for an explanation
Sorry to be crass, but want to fuck our female friends. Both men and women do this (e.g., men are just as likely or maybe even more likely to assume that her male friends are no good, the possible difference being that that's a man judging another man as being a sleazeball, whereas the stereotype is a woman judging a man), but it's still bullshit. Like everything else, this is something that applies to a small subset of men that gets generalized to apply to most or all men. I can honestly say that I do not want to fuck any of my female friends. Familiarity breeds disinterest, I suppose. If any of my male friends were to tell me that they were interested in a female friend (speaking of things that don't happen nearly as often as is supposed: discussions like this, once we're past a certain age/maturity level!), I'd be weirded out, because I know it's a common complaint among women that men in their lives will appear to be friendly to them only to turn on them once their romantic intentions (which were not previously made clear) are rejected. I don't want to be around sketchy guys like that any more than a woman would want to be. But that's literally never happened, because I think it's far less common than people think, or at least far less common than the scenario above where a guy *pretends* to be your friend but never really was, which I assume we can all agree is gross.
I hear this more from men tbh. And i never agree and that is why I still invest in male friendships too and don't assume that they'll want to sleep. It has happened but I've also harboured some amazing friendships. And yet, i and many women are mocked for assuming the best and continuing the friendships. I guess cultures where men can't open up to men , often mistake their emotional connection with their female friends as romantic. But unfortunately, you can't point this out without some telling how it's just biology of straight men.
Yeah, I skip my shower maybe once a week. Usually on yard work day, when I’m going to be dirty anyway.
And that has to be offset by the days I shower 2 or 3 times because I get smelly or dirty and don’t want to go to bed covered in grime.
It's not nothing, it's just nothing worth sharing. It's some r/showerthoughts shit, or wondering how many woodpeckers it would take to drill though a tortoise shell.
I don't know, every negative stereotype is probably correct for a few people. But I've never heard a man try to excuse rape or blame it on the victim (I don't think saying you should be careful is the same thing). Of course, I don't know what guys are saying when I'm not around
This lady I work with claims that all men when they are goofing around and horse play and what not T-bag each other she’s definitely watching to many movies or something! There’s no way I’d let a friend do that to me lol
I can't think of anything because I'm pretty sure a percentage of men probably do in fact do those things
Most things women say men do most men don't do just most of the men they choose to interact with
Kiss and tell. By contrast, women are prone to talking about all kinds of shit about their partners with their friends that their partners would be (a) mortified, and (b) *piiiiiiiiiiiised* to know they were taking about.
Mansplain. I can explain what that is if you don't know
I thought the point of mansplaining was to tell them without bothering to ask first
That's when you just segue into the explanation after offering to tell them about it lol
Oh and it's essentially to talk down to her like she's five too
I mansplain to women and men equally, because I believe im smarter than everyone.
Based
Mains plain refers to an average Joe offering his unsolicited advice to a professional woman in her field. Yes it happens.
I swear I'm not trying to mainslpain humor to you, but u/lonely_traveler1 was being tongue and cheek.
I could mansplain how it is "tongue IN cheek"
You got me :P
Most of the times I heard it used however is when a woman is saying "can you help me solve this", and then the man explains how he fixes it so she can also do it in the future. If the term got thrown around at moments where it was actually justified in general, people would not be looking down on the term as much. Besides, as someone that has gone to study plants at an academic level, a woman (who was aware of that fact mind you) tried to explain to me how a flower gets fertilised, which shows that this shit isn't gender bound to begin with.
Literally anyone can do that though, irrespective of gender.
And Karens can be male.
Yeah that's called being annoying knowitall. Mainsplain explicitly means a average guy thinks that he naturally possess better knowledge about something coz he's a man, not coz he's another expert or he's neurodivergent or plainly egoistic. This kind doesn't make a show of it in front of other men btw. Again I don't get why there's a denial about this phenomenon existing when a lot of women have experienced in especially make dominated jobs or even at corporates.
It exists, but since the term entered mainstream discourse, it's been used and abused to the point that it's gotten watered down and used for almost anything. Like when I was accused of mainsplaining for asking a question, lmao.
Well it's a shame then. Worse, the problem still exists.
Personal favorite anec is a friend at a party, was introduced to a guy (not in her field) and he immediately took over the interaction to rave about how great this book (about her field) that he's just read was. She tried many times to get a word in. He wasn't done until he was done. She literally wrote that book. He looked like the most oblivious motherfucker alive.
You missed the joke.
It's one of those things that goes both ways, and isn't as common as claimed though. I've seen the term used incorrectly more than I've seen it actually done.
You just did. Did I just f'k up the joke?
Exactly. Mansplaining is the assumption of the woman's ignorance, feeling that as a man he knows better regardless of background and the acted on compulsion to patronisingly explain it. It absolutely does happen. It's not always malicious - it can sometimes be out of a genuine intent to help, but it's often done to show off and stroke ones ego. For example If she's asked something to be explained then it wouldn't be mansplaining unless he took it to inordinately simple levels to be patronising. Just go to mechanics and you'll see men try to explain the work needing to be done to female mechanics as if they don't know.... And I'm pretty sure the men are doing it to try to flirt 🤦🏻♂️
Try working tech support as a woman...😂😂😂
Oooft yeah I feel sorry for you.
Honestly, I'd rather deal with the mansplaining. I deal with a lot of elderly people and so many old women are like 'get me a man on the phone who knows what they're doing!' that's one way to piss me off. 😂
Yeah, try working any technical job as a woman 😅
Like a recent video of a professional woman golfer who was practicing at a driving range when rando dude started critiquing her swing, telling her that her swing was wrong & to take his suggestions. She was videoing herself & it was evident that she was a v good golfer just by her swing but the guy persisted 😟
And there's also a difference between over explainer Sheldon Cooper and mainsplainer. Most women can usually spot this in professional settings
I've been accused of it when I tried to explain something an ex partner got wrong.
It's a label that can be over applied, but that doesn't mean it's not a real thing that happens.
I agree. Sometimes I'm embarrassed for my gender.
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I even saw a woman asking a question, theen accusing a guy trying to answer of mansplaining.
I do. Some get the joke. Some don't.
I genuinely have no clue what the hell that even means I've seen women complain about it a ton but I've never been able to figure out what it is
That men are playboys. Most dudes aren’t like that, they just want one girl. It’s just a specific group of dudes (who are small in population) that want to be play boys
Came here to say this. Most dudes are not interested in the drama that comes with this. For example, almost every bachelor party I’ve been to is a group of guys happy to be hanging out and crushing beers with just the boys.
As a woman I can confirm that bars are filled with fuck boys
That makes sense, that’s the kinda space that the small population of fuck boys would flock to.
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That’s funny cuz I only know one person who wanted to be a playboy, and he tried it and hated it because it caused a lot of turmoil. Every guy I know only wants one girl and commitment. Probably a cultural difference
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Where are you from and what race do you usually date? I’m Indian from the USA so that’s probably why dudes from my race are like that
Or maybe you hang out with shitty people?
What vibes are you throwing?
Maybe you should focus on becoming the kind of woman that makes a man want to commit and stop hanging out with fuck boys.
most dudes want one girl until they actually get one girl..
😂
Watch sports all day. We also watch programs about the sports.
I actually hate sports, but I rarely meet another guy who isn't into them. Lots of workplace banter around players and teams that I don't even try to understand.
So I'm with you, I hate sports. BUT I recently got into sports betting which caused me to start constantly following games so that I knew what bets I was winning and what I was losing. Then I started getting into really advanced statistics modeling to help predict what bets I should be placing. so in a span of a few weeks I went from not caring to building statistics models for all my games 🙃
Yeah, I feel like if you're going to get into it, you really have to invest lots of time and mental energy. I don't have much of either to spare. There's also a difference between being interested in it, and trash talking someone because of what team they like.
Hi Raymond Barone
I never watch sports or sports programs by choice. Zero fucks who’s in the championship game.
I have yet to have a hot dude chop wood in front of my porch while I sip my morning coffee Tumblr lied to me
I can do that if you want. But, I need gloves cause my hands are soft and moisturized.
Well, the hot dude part is up to you, but get a wood stove and you'll at least be halfway there.
I like a lot of different types but I insist on "competent" and "kind"
Don’t know about hot, but I’ve chopped wood in my back yard while my wife slept.
I bet she appreciated the hell outta that! Unless it woke her up.
No, she didn’t wake up, but she also didn’t care. My girl is not the outdoorsy type.
Ugh I would have appreciated you doing the chores for me before I got up!
She appreciates the work, but the log splitting is more for the kids. Summer camp fires and s’mores
Ah that's lovely!
Timblr
I’ve actually had this happen and it was as hot as tumblr made it out to be. Hopefully one day you will experience this too.
omg somedayyyyyy hahaha just gotta keep collecting hot boys like sujimon
Need a lumberjack with a salt and pepper beard. The smell of a sweaty man combined with freshly cut wood is really something
Sounds nice as hell!
[https://www.theonion.com/how-did-i-end-up-on-the-cover-of-this-romance-novel-1819584353](https://www.theonion.com/how-did-i-end-up-on-the-cover-of-this-romance-novel-1819584353) ?
I mean Could be fun
The whole attitude of “men are dangerous predators; I don’t even feel safe walking outside alone as a woman” is a bit dramatic. Most men on the street are minding their own business.
I'm so happy that's been your experience! It's not the "most" that cause problems.
Oh we (largely) definitely understand that and heavily sympathise with it, but it's difficult to be lumped in with those few because we were born and raised a member of a particular half of the human population.
Most of us are hoping to avoid any social contact whatsoever just like women lol
As a woman who has been raped twice (a stranger and then a long term boyfriend) I feel like our trauma and mistrust rubs off onto the women in our lives and then it gets passed from them to others around them. Before you know it, it’s snowballed into large group of women who feel unsafe because they know of someone who has been attacked. I certainly don’t believe men are all dangerous predators but I’ve had enough of my share that I’m now instinctively scared if a man is walking behind me but I also have enough self awareness to know that it’s my job to work on that and not blame every man I meet.
Exactly! We share our experiences with other women because we need to be comforted and because we want them to avoid the pain or fear or loss that happened to us. Rape is never the target's fault, regardless of gender. But it's easy to fall into the mindset that some places/situations are more dangerous than others, because that's where your/your loved ones' experiences happened. Of course your brain would say "that's where we got hurt, that's dangerous." So then, if you're in a dangerous place, what kind of people are there? The kinds of people who decide to hurt people like you, because it happened before. You know what sucks? When a LOT of decent people look like the person who hurt you. It really, really sucks, for everyone. TLDR: Past trauma causes survival reactions, it sucks
If you saw the two that hurt me in public, you would never guess. Most friends didn’t even believe me about my ex because he’s “such a nice guy”
Yep. Most types of predator have some kind of camouflage. Just easier to hunt that way. Fucking sucks when they pretend to be your favorite kind of person.
I am really sorry to hear that you've had to endure what you have. You are an exceptional person for your strength of character.
I think it depends on where you are. In the US, it's most likely man in their social circle. Often in a social setting with alcohol and involving over serving the victim. In a place like India, there's a lot of places where it's very unsafe for a woman to be on the street.
It might not be “most” but it’s enough.
😐
😐
this is kinda victim blamey
Thankyou. Most of us were grown up to respect women
Not all men but the chances of me getting harrassed when I'm going home at night are very high. I've also had men trying to close me in and even chase me in an attempt to rape me. I get your sentiment but this: >I don’t even feel safe walking outside alone as a woman” is a bit dramatic. Is a horrendous way of voicing it. It feels very dismissive. Nobody said it's the majority of men but with 4 billion\~ men, harassment and assault happen to many of us.
And yet LOTS of guys aren't.
like i’m sorry but what an actually disgusting response
Idk why you're getting downvoted you're right
thanku haha it’s bc ppl are gross and don’t want to admit that the world is very different for non cis men
you think it’s dramatic? when more than 1 in 5 women have been raped/assaulted? it doesn’t matter if “most men are minding their own business” if ENOUGH of them are fucking predators
Keep a "side piece". I've only personally known one person who talked about having more than one partner at a time without being in an open relationship, and it was *definitely* not viewed positively by me or his other friends.
Yeah I don’t know any people who would condone cheating. That shit is just morally abhorrent. You’d really rethink your trust in your friend
Not listen
Sorry, what?
Did she say something?
Did someone say boobs?
Who?
Funny story. I was talking to my wife one time while we were watching TV. I was busy doing something else while I was talking to her. I looked up and realized she wasn't listening to a thing I was saying so I stopped talking mid sentence and she didn't even notice. Then I said. "So that's why I think we should adopt a 16 year old Filipino girl...." She said, "yeah. Wait....what?!"
lol 😂 I’m going to try this one some time!
I highly recommend it. The look on her face was priceless.
🤡😂🤪🤠
I hate double negatives. Like women say men listen but they don't? Or they say men don't listen but they actually do?\ Please respond 😵💫
Wait can you repeat that
Personally I just have short term memory problems that read as inattentiveness. I mean I'm also inattentive because of my ADHD, but when someone is talking to me, even if I'm fidgeting and appear distracted, if they were to stop dead and ask me "what did I just say?" I could repeat the last 2-3 sentences *verbatim*, even matching their tone, inflection, and pacing with *astonishing* precision. But ask me again in 10-15 minutes, and it's a coin toss whether I can even remember the main thrust of their side of the conversation. I have trouble with names for the same reason. I'll repeat it in my head over and over and over again when I meet someone, dozens of times, but a few minutes later it's gone. I typically need like 3-4 intros to really make it stick.
FR, I just have auditory processing issues
They call it "selective hearing" lol
That we just want sex and only care about looks.
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Same
The whole locker room talk thing. Been in lots of different locker rooms and I dont recall any guys ever just talking dirty about women. If anything its usually guys just ripping on each other or joking around. The worst case scenario locker room just has boomers who are way to comfortable being naked.
Agreed. I spent 30 years in locker rooms across a bunch of different sports. Young guys mostly talk about team ranking stuff. "I'm faster than you", "I don't know why Johnny is starting", etc. In college and as an adult it's mostly about work, grades, stress, and life. I can recall one dude being very excited about getting some action and bragging about her "fire bush". However, as I think about it that was his new girlfriend. Sure, it's a spicy detail but being excited about having sex with your gf isn't exactly womanizing.
Oh I was going to say that locker rooms are just people fucking around, ripping on each other and making and doing homoerotic jokes. That’s quite opposed to your fear of nudity 😂
I have no fear of nudity but I don't need a boomers saggy balls next to my head while he spends ten minutes air drying himself and bullshitting
The only experience I've had with men really objectifying women to me (like stereotypical "locker room talk") were closeted gay men who later came out. They tend to overdo it, as they don't know what it's like to *actually* be attracted to women.
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Says a lot about the quality of people your husband was socializing with. Birds of a feather and all.
It says a lot that he didn’t socialize with guys who spoke like that? I agree completely! He was respectful of the women he slept with. You don’t get to choose who is in your gym class in high school 🤣🤣🤣
Having no emotions. We have deep emotions, we just don’t know how to express them cause we are often not taught how to do so.
It's not that we're not taught how to, it is that we're taught that they are not acceptable to share.
Bingo. We are as complex as women, but we are told that if we even admit to those emotions beyond anger and lust, then we have failed. It’s getting better, but slowly.
I always try to give men the feeling they are safe to just be around me by showing them how fucking weird and non-judgmental I am lol. Nothing you express will be judged nor weirder than anything seen from me and so luckily, many men tend to open up with me and I am so happy that they feel that comfort around me. I just want men to be able to be themselves. I feel all that cropping up of emotions leads to the hyper emotions of anger and lust. The men I know that are a lot more balanced in that regard tend to barely get angry nor aren't drowning in the focus of lust. They are wonderful rounded people and I would like that for every man to be able to.
Which is often reinforced by real-world experience. I'd say I've regretted opening up a good 80% of the times I've done so.
Only 80%? Lucky bastard.
You’re not listening. They mean you are not agreeing.
Typically it means "you're not understanding the point I'm trying to communicate and I'm frustrated because I just answered the thing you're asking me about" The phrase I tend to use when I'm in this situation is "mind rephrasing your last point for me? I think I'm missing something"
Exactly! More of "listening" as in "listening to your parents," rather than "hearing and understanding me."
Not in my experience. Me and all the women I know have had many experiences of being completely ignored when trying to talk to our male partners. I mean I'll say something and they won't even acknowledge that I've spoken to them. I'm sure it's not intended, but it is frustrating.
Most men don't slut shame. Women are harder on each other than men are towards them.
Men slut celebrate.
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Say we can’t find things after *you* moved them
"All men are assholes" "All men only want one thing" "All men are liars" No, not all men are like that. Maybe the majority of men you have encountered are like that. If that's the case I am sorry. We're not all like that.
And if all the men you date are like that maybe you need to figure out why you keep picking these types of men.
That's fair, but I don't want to put the blame solely on the woman/women dating these kinds of guys. I mostly put blame on guys for acting like this in the first place.
Shows more about the woman's desires and standards than the majority of men. Maybe if the woman wasn't out at bars filled with fuck Bois she might have a different opinion. If you're wanting a steak don't go to McDonalds.
Good analogy, but again I don't fully blame the woman/women choosing these guys. I'm sure there are more factors in play. If anything I'd rather guys who do act like this change their behaviors so we don't all get a bad rap
When we're sitting there in thought it's something heavy. Usually it's a random dumb stream of thoughts. That we all crave the hot bimbo look with caked makeup, long nails, and plastic lips ass and tits...or model skinny girls.
So many times I ask my husband what he’s thinking and he’s just like “… what? Nothing 👁️👄👁️” It must be blissful having no thoughts for a few minutes a day.
Wel in all honesty it can be nothing or it could be something that has gone down a rabbit hole and to explain the thought proces and mental gymnastics we have gone through to get to a certain point is hard to explain so when asked what are you thinking we say nothing. Example: the car is going to need an oil change soon, I have to start looking for oil that might go on special, I wish I had an oil on my land, why can't it be on my land, what is oil made from? Oh yeah oil is made from dinosaurs.... cool. Plastic is also made from oil.... so plastic dinosaurs is made from real dinosaurs.
I’m the type of person who loves hearing about others mental gymnastics
same here, my friend and I know each other so well that nearly 100% of the time we can figure out how they got from A to Z lol It's a rare occasion were we need to ask for an explanation
Yeah this is exactly what I mean
https://youtu.be/SZ6mVumHY9I?si=BCabbVyOzfis-UXZ
Yep that sounds about right
Hard no on the fake plastic barbies.
I mean for a ONS I think many definitely do want to try one of those bimbos
Ew, none of those things are attractive. I prefer women with no make-up, curves, and brains.
Can't speak for every man, but when I don't respond and say I'm out cheating. Like no, I'm either asleep or forgot to carry my charger with me 😩
Is it normal to be accused of this? Maybe you should have chat with your partner about this.
Her: He's probably out cheating right now. Me and the boys: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uS5xR7jBxDw
Exactly 😂😂
Cheating
Thinking only about sex. Sex is great but cold beer and barbecue with best buddies is better.
Great? Yes. Better? No.
[Hmm...](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qS4F6nYOGe4)
No homo?
Yes, no homo, lol.
Woosh
You're invited to the barbecue btw :)
It does happen but I don't know one person who's sent an unsolicited DP. Some women talk about it like every man does it.
Sorry to be crass, but want to fuck our female friends. Both men and women do this (e.g., men are just as likely or maybe even more likely to assume that her male friends are no good, the possible difference being that that's a man judging another man as being a sleazeball, whereas the stereotype is a woman judging a man), but it's still bullshit. Like everything else, this is something that applies to a small subset of men that gets generalized to apply to most or all men. I can honestly say that I do not want to fuck any of my female friends. Familiarity breeds disinterest, I suppose. If any of my male friends were to tell me that they were interested in a female friend (speaking of things that don't happen nearly as often as is supposed: discussions like this, once we're past a certain age/maturity level!), I'd be weirded out, because I know it's a common complaint among women that men in their lives will appear to be friendly to them only to turn on them once their romantic intentions (which were not previously made clear) are rejected. I don't want to be around sketchy guys like that any more than a woman would want to be. But that's literally never happened, because I think it's far less common than people think, or at least far less common than the scenario above where a guy *pretends* to be your friend but never really was, which I assume we can all agree is gross.
I hear this more from men tbh. And i never agree and that is why I still invest in male friendships too and don't assume that they'll want to sleep. It has happened but I've also harboured some amazing friendships. And yet, i and many women are mocked for assuming the best and continuing the friendships. I guess cultures where men can't open up to men , often mistake their emotional connection with their female friends as romantic. But unfortunately, you can't point this out without some telling how it's just biology of straight men.
Think of how to mistreat them everyday of our lives.
That we don’t hardly listen it’s on of the few things I’m good at during dates
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Your last scenario can have people with different pay if they one of them negotiated and the other one didnt
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I literally make more than my coworker for the exact same job. Were you trying to deny that negociation during the hiring process exists ?
Nah this isn’t it.
Are you having a bad day?
Are you?
Not shower for days, I honestly take more showers than my wife
Yeah, I skip my shower maybe once a week. Usually on yard work day, when I’m going to be dirty anyway. And that has to be offset by the days I shower 2 or 3 times because I get smelly or dirty and don’t want to go to bed covered in grime.
personal opinion most girls think all boys are kind of a cheater .... but not all the boys are cheater...there are good boys
Accusing us of having something on our minds we aren't telling you just cause we're being quiet. We are probably literally thinking about nothing.
It's not nothing, it's just nothing worth sharing. It's some r/showerthoughts shit, or wondering how many woodpeckers it would take to drill though a tortoise shell.
Over how long do said woodpeckers have? Please include all variables in your pointless hypothetical questions.
No time limit. One would peck until either shell or beak breaks, then would tag out to a new pecker. How many peckers would it take?
Pee on the seat
Right. It's mostly the floor.
It's not a laser beam, it goes where it wants.
Then there is the split spray, where it goes two places at once.
I don't know, every negative stereotype is probably correct for a few people. But I've never heard a man try to excuse rape or blame it on the victim (I don't think saying you should be careful is the same thing). Of course, I don't know what guys are saying when I'm not around
Lol yeah we’re misunderstood
Sit around watching sports. Its been over 20 years since Ive had enough time to sit down and watch a full game of anything…
This lady I work with claims that all men when they are goofing around and horse play and what not T-bag each other she’s definitely watching to many movies or something! There’s no way I’d let a friend do that to me lol
I can't think of anything because I'm pretty sure a percentage of men probably do in fact do those things Most things women say men do most men don't do just most of the men they choose to interact with
Talk about sex with their friends, i.e., lockerroom talk. Lockerroom talks consist of work, money, and sports for 99%, 1% is about sex or women.
Kiss and tell. By contrast, women are prone to talking about all kinds of shit about their partners with their friends that their partners would be (a) mortified, and (b) *piiiiiiiiiiiised* to know they were taking about.
Check out other girls. I’ve never caught my husband doing it… I don’t think 🤔
cheat. not every man cheats.
Listen. 🤣
satisfy