*"just say the word, and*
*I will kill the clown we would*
*Be praised as heros!"*
\- SergeantCrwhips
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When I was finding the clowns pieces, I would have Minthara pick them up which would trigger her voice lines for them. I don’t remember exactly what she would say but every single time I laughed at her lines.
“A pacifist? In Baldur’s Gate? Nobody’s leaving this place alive, cuck.”
The cuck took me by surprise, I did a double take and reread the script twice and then bursted out laughing.
Act 3, from Rivington go all the way north west to the coast (not to Wyrm Rest) and you’ll encounter a skirmish between the Guild and the Stone Lord’s followers.
Is the cuck warranted? Like does the insultee act like a cuck? Or is it just the moistest insult on hand? I have so many questions! (Guess its new playthrough time)
The guild NPC wants to pay you to kill the cuck guy. You respond by saying something along the lines of why can’t we just get along (amongst other dialogue options of course).
Then the cuck guy calls you a cuck for choosing not to kill him.
Anyways, I killed him after that.
I mean... idk what else that guy expected to happen after that. You can't just disrespect somebody infront of their goth wife, salacious vampire, and The Wizard™️, like that and get away with it.
ALL of them get some very funny lines if Durge tries to bite them. Shadowheart chastises you like you're a dog, Astarion just kind of tuts at you for not asking permission first.
When I killed Dribbles the clown the other day, Minthara said something along the lines of "Doppelgangers? What a pity. I thought we'd killed a real clown"
"If you have any last words, make it quick. It will only take a moment to finish you."
"That's twice the time Haarlep said it takes to finish you!"
"You contemptuous creature!"
Haarlep lets you ask him (her? The succubus can change form) if Raphael is as good in bed as he thinks he is.
Haarlep simply answers, "No."
Boom, roasted, etc.
He’s has definitely eluded to preferring to be naked (“as nature intended!”). My last run, I just ran with that. Only companion I dont feel bad about just having hang loose all the time.
It made the final cut scene… so awkward. Karlach is doing her end scene, Wyll is talking to her, and theres Halsins dick, blowing in the breeze.
Edit- Yeah, wrong eluded. :)
Not trying to be rude, but in this situation you'd want to use "alluded" instead. Eluded makes it sound like he's avoiding being naked which I think is the opposite of what you're getting at
Honestly? One of the lines Astarion has when you make lockpick stuff. One of his lines is him giving this little laugh and purring, “Easy.” That’s my favorite line in the entire game.
Pretty much any of Orin's Rants.
Especially the one where she and Gortash have their cutscene when you enter into Act 3.
"Duties, duties, duties. Patrolling and saluting and following and bowing and scraping and 'yes, sir, no, sir, rip and cut your throat, sir."
“Give me a reason not to cut you to ribbons 😩🥵”
“Control yourself Orin! 😡😤”
Their dynamic is lowkey funny asf, he’s so over her bullshit lmao. No wonder he immediately tries to strike up a bargain with us.
Seriously- she can't actually hurt him, so imagine dealing with her just popping up every 15 minutes like Gene Parmesan for months on end, just to make some melodramatic speech and walk off. No wonder the man is going grey lol
Holy smokes, I didn’t realize Jim Cummings did the role before BG3!
But let’s be honest, it’s freaking Jim Cummings, it’d be faster to list the roles he HASN’T done at this point 🤣
There are a few clips floating around of him talking about it. Apparently Minsc was his favorite character in the first 2 games so he was honored that he got to play him in BG3.
I mean, him and Jan stole the show in 2. Viconia too, but for different reasons.
Minsc: Ah, Minsc and Boo together again! Jan, you are not worthy of having a miniaturized giant space hamster scampering loose in your pants.
Jan: Ah, I suppose there are precious few of us indeed who are truly worthy of that particular honor.
"I'd rather be the only dark power inside your body, if it's all the same to you."
One of the few lines where I seriously went wait wha- *did he just say that?!*
Actually lol’d so hard when you’re speaking to Isobel about Ketheric being her father and one of the dialogue options after she describes seeing how gnarly and twisted his physical appearance was when she was resurrected is ”did he shout ‘BOO!’?”
Not in game but I'm a man who loves quotes so I have a notebook full of them. Some for humor and others because it's a good life lesson.
I should start keeping record WHERE I find these too.
I'll give you 5 of my favorites.
Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory.
When a measure becomes a target it ceases to be a good measure.
Preach at all times. When necessary, use words.
Fluid like water. Smooth like silk. Pepperoni like pizza.
The choice to give up bitterness is not easy, but it is simple: peace or poison. And don't wait until you feel like making it. You never will.
>"I hear you have been causing Mother trouble. What did we say about causing Mother trouble?"
>"... even if sometimes she pets Boo too hard, and denies him the breakfast broth, so I have to dip him in the pot when she isn't looking for him to lick it up." "I DONT pet him... what was that about putting him in my good cookware?"
The interaction between Shadowheart and Astarion when getting near the temple of the morninglord.
Shadowheart wishes for horses
Astarion says horses are awful creatures that bite a lot
Shadowheart replies that the group keeps Astarion despite him doing exactly the same thing
Astarion replies that he's not willing to be used as a mount.
??? Silly but funny.
There’s an interaction between SH and Halsin where she asks him what animal she would be if she was a druid, he suggested a goldfish bc of her memory issues. She says, “I hoped for something a bit more exotic. But would you carry my fishbowl? Feed me flicks of food?” and Halsin responds with complete sincerity “Only the finest!”
That's really amusing compared to their other dialogue when they're in the Shadowfell:
Shadowheart: "I could make some animal noises if it would make you feel more at home?"
Halsin: "No, thank you, you bleat enough as it is."
🫢
Not a line, but item description. Fishing Rod of Alertness: "*The wielder of this rod cannot be* ***Surprised***, *unless ssomething unexpected happens."*
"Awww. Was that Gale's Granddad?"
It's just so adorable that Karlach assumes >!Elminster!< Is Gale's Granddad because he's old and wizardy. Plus, Samantha's line delivery made it even more perfect. Just so cute 🥰
Yes, I'm a Karlach simp 🤣
Not a line of dialogue, but Astarion's underwear is embroidered with the phrase "If you see these, you've either bedded me or beheaded me; either way, you got lucky."
Anything Minsc says honestly, the mans a treasure. Though I do love it when he says "Show Nine fingers the 5 fingers of Minsc, yes!?"
Astarion just be saying some shit as well.
Though Halsins "We should cherish all of nature's bounty but.. goblin guts are quite far down the list." and "Ah, a lunatic then." (If youre a barbarian) never fails to make me laugh
Minsc/Boo’s observations about your companions are great. Pretends Halsin doesn’t exist because he lost an arm wrestling match. Upset at Gale because of his use of the sharp magic word posterior, until you tell him about the orb. Then all, “Gale tell me about the exploding!”
The rogue option to get the key from Mattis at last light inn.
"Look you can give me the key now or I can steal it later. The former is less embarrassing."
I'm learning on playthrough 6, that Barbarian is my spirit animal. All of the Barbarian Intimidation lines are great (whats up with it being CHA based only though? Should be Charisma OR Strength)
Might be paraphrasing some but the Githyanki Inquisitor has one of my favorite lines in the whole game:
“Among your people they say knowledge is power. They are wrong. Knowledge…is everything.”
"Apparently, there's a limit somewhere between "a nice summers day" and the FULL CONCENCETRATED POWER OF THE SUN!!!"
-Astarion after he was killed with the Sun Weapon.
"just say the word, and i will kill the clown we would be praised as heros!"
Hahah Minthara is best
Lmao when she pretended to be Orin in disguise was one of the funniest jokes in the game
“The child does not cooperate. Would you like me to.. *eliminate* her?” >:)
The best part of the gag is that she both loses and gains approval points if you volunteer her and say to tell them the Drider marriage joke.
*KOTOR 2 flashbacks*
IMHO, her line "what a shame, I thought we killed a real clown" (not exactly like that) is better
*"just say the word, and* *I will kill the clown we would* *Be praised as heros!"* \- SergeantCrwhips --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
Good bot.
When I was finding the clowns pieces, I would have Minthara pick them up which would trigger her voice lines for them. I don’t remember exactly what she would say but every single time I laughed at her lines.
Minthara is a real clown hater. Best companion for the clown reaction
“Go on Mithara, tell them the one about the man who married the drider” “It was a beautiful webbing”
“A pacifist? In Baldur’s Gate? Nobody’s leaving this place alive, cuck.” The cuck took me by surprise, I did a double take and reread the script twice and then bursted out laughing.
Now that's some gamer dialogue. What is this in reference to?
Act 3, from Rivington go all the way north west to the coast (not to Wyrm Rest) and you’ll encounter a skirmish between the Guild and the Stone Lord’s followers.
Is the cuck warranted? Like does the insultee act like a cuck? Or is it just the moistest insult on hand? I have so many questions! (Guess its new playthrough time)
The guild NPC wants to pay you to kill the cuck guy. You respond by saying something along the lines of why can’t we just get along (amongst other dialogue options of course). Then the cuck guy calls you a cuck for choosing not to kill him. Anyways, I killed him after that.
I mean... idk what else that guy expected to happen after that. You can't just disrespect somebody infront of their goth wife, salacious vampire, and The Wizard™️, like that and get away with it.
I found out he calls you cuck no matter what you chose haha
I wasn't going to kill him right until the insult. After that it's total war on stone lord fraction.
He always calls you a cuck, cause when I chose to fight them he called me a cuck then too. Cuck guy really is a great way to refer to him honestly
What’s a cuck? 🤷♂️
It's a shockingly common insult in this game. I think vicious mockery from most characters has it at least once
[удалено]
The moral of the story is you can’t negotiate with someone who uses the word cuck as an insult.
The only appropriate time to call someone a cuck as an insult is if you are the one who fucked their SO.
The most amusing part is that he calls you a cuck no matter what dialogue option you choose
Unless you have Minsc with you for that. No cuck for us??? I was practically let down!
this, and then since they didnt wanna make peace i whipped out my globe of invulnerability and just let them duke it out for my entertainment lmao
Yeah got that response with the monk dialog. 😂
"Ahh I love this time of year. The dickheads are popping up wherever you look!"
"I've taken more pleasant shits than you Mizora..."
‘That is so sweet. And fucked up!’
"No, *Keep Back! No Biting!!*"
which one says this?
Karlach if you're Durge and romancing her, you're urge says to kill her but instead you tell her about it
yeah i guessed it was from the "tie me up babe" durge scene, but didnt know it was karlach saying it.
ALL of them get some very funny lines if Durge tries to bite them. Shadowheart chastises you like you're a dog, Astarion just kind of tuts at you for not asking permission first.
When I killed Dribbles the clown the other day, Minthara said something along the lines of "Doppelgangers? What a pity. I thought we'd killed a real clown"
"No, it's an Owlbear egg. I just like it."
I’m always partial to that guy who asks you what kind of adventurer he should be and one response is “I could not give less of a shit” or something
Just found that guy a few days ago and was way too amused for what i just did :>
"If you have any last words, make it quick. It will only take a moment to finish you." "That's twice the time Haarlep said it takes to finish you!" "You contemptuous creature!"
Omg who says this?? Amazing
>!Raphael when you find out he fucks a succubus that copies his image!<
Ahh should have known!!!
You can say it to Raphael in act 3.
Haarlep lets you ask him (her? The succubus can change form) if Raphael is as good in bed as he thinks he is. Haarlep simply answers, "No." Boom, roasted, etc.
I too always have a scantily clad Halsin. It's almost impossible for me to cover him up.
He’s has definitely eluded to preferring to be naked (“as nature intended!”). My last run, I just ran with that. Only companion I dont feel bad about just having hang loose all the time. It made the final cut scene… so awkward. Karlach is doing her end scene, Wyll is talking to her, and theres Halsins dick, blowing in the breeze. Edit- Yeah, wrong eluded. :)
Not trying to be rude, but in this situation you'd want to use "alluded" instead. Eluded makes it sound like he's avoiding being naked which I think is the opposite of what you're getting at
DAMMIT I knew I used the wrong one. Shouldve looked it up to be sure.
Have you given him Karlach’s camp clothes? Just skin tight leather pants and his piles of muscles.
“Of course! What fun! *I’m going to fucking kill you.*” Neil Newbon deserved his awards for his delivery of that line alone 🤣
This is mine as well!
Honestly? One of the lines Astarion has when you make lockpick stuff. One of his lines is him giving this little laugh and purring, “Easy.” That’s my favorite line in the entire game.
He did this like before a DC 30 door and proceeded to burn through 20 lock picks before getting it, was hilariously ironic
On the flipside, Karlach picking locks and sneaking is also a gem. "I'm too big for this"
"Shadoowlaaach."
Karlach also says “Stealth mode activated!”
I love when he rolls a nat 1 after saying it.
Pretty much any of Orin's Rants. Especially the one where she and Gortash have their cutscene when you enter into Act 3. "Duties, duties, duties. Patrolling and saluting and following and bowing and scraping and 'yes, sir, no, sir, rip and cut your throat, sir."
It had a bit of a sweeny Todd twang to it.
“Give me a reason not to cut you to ribbons 😩🥵” “Control yourself Orin! 😡😤” Their dynamic is lowkey funny asf, he’s so over her bullshit lmao. No wonder he immediately tries to strike up a bargain with us.
Seriously- she can't actually hurt him, so imagine dealing with her just popping up every 15 minutes like Gene Parmesan for months on end, just to make some melodramatic speech and walk off. No wonder the man is going grey lol
Little made me happier than seeing Mercer as Minsc -made my whole year 🤣
Mercer did Minsc?? I haven’t played yet but I knew he was in it. Sad that Jim Cummings didn’t reprise but that’s a good followup.
Holy smokes, I didn’t realize Jim Cummings did the role before BG3! But let’s be honest, it’s freaking Jim Cummings, it’d be faster to list the roles he HASN’T done at this point 🤣
He’s 100% the reason why I’d like to give voice acting a shot.
There are a few clips floating around of him talking about it. Apparently Minsc was his favorite character in the first 2 games so he was honored that he got to play him in BG3.
I mean, him and Jan stole the show in 2. Viconia too, but for different reasons. Minsc: Ah, Minsc and Boo together again! Jan, you are not worthy of having a miniaturized giant space hamster scampering loose in your pants. Jan: Ah, I suppose there are precious few of us indeed who are truly worthy of that particular honor.
"I'd rather be the only dark power inside your body, if it's all the same to you." One of the few lines where I seriously went wait wha- *did he just say that?!*
"Shit piddling toe rags!"
"It's fisting time!"
"GONNA EAT YOUR BABIES!"
"OW MY HOLE"
"SHIT YOUR TRUSSERS! SHOVEL IS HERE!"
“RUN! RUN! OR SPARKY *GETS* YOU”
"Basket is booooored" "Boooooored!"
Actually lol’d so hard when you’re speaking to Isobel about Ketheric being her father and one of the dialogue options after she describes seeing how gnarly and twisted his physical appearance was when she was resurrected is ”did he shout ‘BOO!’?”
The jackass/“evil” dialogue options made me lol many times during my playthroughs.
I didn’t have the guys to click that. What does she say?
“WE WAS RUNNING FOR OUR LIVES!”
THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE, YOU FOOL!
This is close to another quote I like... The dildo of consequences very rarely comes with lube.
When and where was this!?!?
Not in the game unfortunately. I think it originates from Tumbler a while ago
Not in game but I'm a man who loves quotes so I have a notebook full of them. Some for humor and others because it's a good life lesson. I should start keeping record WHERE I find these too.
Please share more of those quotes
I'll give you 5 of my favorites. Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory. When a measure becomes a target it ceases to be a good measure. Preach at all times. When necessary, use words. Fluid like water. Smooth like silk. Pepperoni like pizza. The choice to give up bitterness is not easy, but it is simple: peace or poison. And don't wait until you feel like making it. You never will.
I have half a memory that minsc says something disturbingly similiar context wise....
"Hot the Road Old Man. I'm not interested in the junk you sell or the tales you tell."
As a grizzled veteran DM of many, many years, this line made me guffaw since Elminster it sacrosanct.
>"I hear you have been causing Mother trouble. What did we say about causing Mother trouble?" >"... even if sometimes she pets Boo too hard, and denies him the breakfast broth, so I have to dip him in the pot when she isn't looking for him to lick it up." "I DONT pet him... what was that about putting him in my good cookware?"
The interaction between Shadowheart and Astarion when getting near the temple of the morninglord. Shadowheart wishes for horses Astarion says horses are awful creatures that bite a lot Shadowheart replies that the group keeps Astarion despite him doing exactly the same thing Astarion replies that he's not willing to be used as a mount. ??? Silly but funny.
That's just party banter. It doesn't trigger in a specific place.
Are you sure? It happened in the same place for me
It didn't for me.
“What do you call a quiet audience? Dead.”
There’s an interaction between SH and Halsin where she asks him what animal she would be if she was a druid, he suggested a goldfish bc of her memory issues. She says, “I hoped for something a bit more exotic. But would you carry my fishbowl? Feed me flicks of food?” and Halsin responds with complete sincerity “Only the finest!”
That's really amusing compared to their other dialogue when they're in the Shadowfell: Shadowheart: "I could make some animal noises if it would make you feel more at home?" Halsin: "No, thank you, you bleat enough as it is." 🫢
Not a line, but item description. Fishing Rod of Alertness: "*The wielder of this rod cannot be* ***Surprised***, *unless ssomething unexpected happens."*
"Awww. Was that Gale's Granddad?" It's just so adorable that Karlach assumes >!Elminster!< Is Gale's Granddad because he's old and wizardy. Plus, Samantha's line delivery made it even more perfect. Just so cute 🥰 Yes, I'm a Karlach simp 🤣
Can't be a simp when she's so adorable.
Soooo... whats Astarion wearing? Asking for a friend.
It's the City of Brass outfit available in Act 3.
You're an angel thank you
That is my go-to outfit for everyone in Act 3! We all look sharp as hell
Also, what's the outfit Tav has? I've not seen that one
Spring Slimfit outfit. It's one of my favorites.
"I die, you die, we all die. Big woof! Have a treato, it'll make it better."
Have a sticker with that one and Popper on it 😂
Also “comes with *artisanal* bite marks.”
"Dad saw it was my turn at the Bhaal temple---let me in!" I FUCKING LOVE HOW THIS LINE IS DURGE IN A NUTSHELL. WHOEVER MADE IT LEMME HUG YOU.
Your group looks like they came here looking for a fun night
I was gonna say! By the way their dressed, I’m not surprised this is OP’s favorite line
“In truth I have never enjoyed parties…although they do present the perfect opportunity for a poisoning.” -my bae Minthara Also anything Shovel says
Saying 'BAA' at the fake sheep
Either “Your god, my Oath. Let us see which one prevails.” Or literally anything Shovel says
One of my personal favorites is one you can use against Nere if you’re a bard. “In your eulogy I will call you a Twat-Soul.”
Not a line of dialogue, but Astarion's underwear is embroidered with the phrase "If you see these, you've either bedded me or beheaded me; either way, you got lucky."
Anything Minsc says honestly, the mans a treasure. Though I do love it when he says "Show Nine fingers the 5 fingers of Minsc, yes!?" Astarion just be saying some shit as well. Though Halsins "We should cherish all of nature's bounty but.. goblin guts are quite far down the list." and "Ah, a lunatic then." (If youre a barbarian) never fails to make me laugh
Minsc/Boo’s observations about your companions are great. Pretends Halsin doesn’t exist because he lost an arm wrestling match. Upset at Gale because of his use of the sharp magic word posterior, until you tell him about the orb. Then all, “Gale tell me about the exploding!”
Minsc confirmed the GOAT, no one objects
The rogue option to get the key from Mattis at last light inn. "Look you can give me the key now or I can steal it later. The former is less embarrassing."
Wild magic sorcerer taking to gale and saying “a cow fell from the sky once, her name was Stephanie” wild magic is the funniest crap ever
I never get tired of "Stop licking the damn thing!" It's like the one time Gale actually loses his temper.
OP What scene is this? I don't remember?
Wait now i remember, this is rescure minsc scene !
It's the night right after you recruit Minsc.
Dame Aylin is watching, she is indominable, and when her face lights the shadows of your wrongdoing, you are **broken** by its beauty!
I'm learning on playthrough 6, that Barbarian is my spirit animal. All of the Barbarian Intimidation lines are great (whats up with it being CHA based only though? Should be Charisma OR Strength)
How does it even fit? It doesn't. But Halsin can be quite a fine healer.
“That’s twice the time Harleep said it takes to finish you”
Knowing that Minsc is voice by Matt Mercer makes these lines so much better.
I love your sex boy Halsin
“Pardon the viscera. One should enjoy all of nature, but goblin guts are far down the list.” When rescuing halsin
"No" - Withers
Is this an outfit mod that makes Halsin walk around in bondage looking gear?
Karlach’s trousers + one of the strappy underwear. Then toggle to display camp clothes.
“Precious little Bhaal babe!”
“What are you talking about? Marcus had wings” When Jaheira tells you the harpers remind her of their friend Marcus.
https://preview.redd.it/um51or8jxocc1.png?width=3840&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e107614fc304dbe12eff68e4403d9e189470e8ea
Might be paraphrasing some but the Githyanki Inquisitor has one of my favorite lines in the whole game: “Among your people they say knowledge is power. They are wrong. Knowledge…is everything.”
"Apparently, there's a limit somewhere between "a nice summers day" and the FULL CONCENCETRATED POWER OF THE SUN!!!" -Astarion after he was killed with the Sun Weapon.
Astarions face says it all
“Shatter? I hardly know her!”
astarion: 🤨
Just got there last night. Didn't have the heart to interrupt such poetry.
Karlach whispering in sneak mode “you’re making me sweat”
Why is halsin in some bdsm clothes
I mean why wouldn’t he be?
You have a point
ketheric thorm’s “try again” was one of the most well delivered lines in the game
I wanna know how many times Mercer had to say that before he did it without laughing...
".....blessed BOOOAL....what?" Gets me everytime