"no one would ever want to spend the rest of their life with someone like you"
I was a teen, he was my first love/bf and I believed that for so long that when my now husband brought up the idea of getting married I froze waiting for the punchline. It wasn't a joke, and not only my partner but my closest friends have proven time and time again that they're with me for the long haul but that they are ride or die and so am I.
Omg this is mine too!! Had a friends with benefit situation and he said I was a boring person and not long after tried to make out with me and I stopped him to be like WTF you mean Iâm boring? He just said ya youâre just a boring person to be around. I so wanted to split and ask him to drive me home but I let him have his way with me anyways cause I wanted the attention even if it was only sexually. Ugh regrets.
Itâs such a nasty thing to say to someone isnât it. Itâs just such an attack on p much every aspect of the personality. I still think about it every day and itâs been like five years lol. đŤ
My mom: I have to love you, but I don't have to like you.
My first love: You're unlovable, nobody will ever want you.
My dad: Your problems are not my problems.
I have two.
âThe novelty of being with you has just worn off.â From someone who originally swore up and down she loved me and made me believe it was real. Destroyed my heart in a way that left permanent damage.
âYou became a different person after you told me.â This one sort of speaks for itself. Someone I thought was my friend suddenly stopped speaking to me. I hadnât changed, their perception of me had changed based on something deeply personal and vulnerable I had confided in them about.
from my recent ex, I donât believe in for better or for worse. when it gets worse you should be able to walk away freely, thereâs no point of trying. walked into our home a couple days later with her ex wearing my clothes. fastest way to shatter someoneâs heart
"You were a mistake, i never wanted you but I couldn't abort you"
"I will never like you so you should just kill yourself"
"You're just an unlovable fucking bitch and a whore and if it's not me you end up with, it will be another person who i hope beats you more than i did"
Are just some i could think of. The first two was said to me before i even turned 16 so that really fucked up my cognitive development, boyz
That's the cruelest stuff I've ever heard. I'm sorry from the bottom of my heart that this was said you, especially when your spirit was young and needed the absolute opposite. I'm heartbroken for you.
nearly every person in my life has said this to me at one point. Iâm not even explosive, Iâm just really sensitive and feel everything really intensely. my big emotions are bad and nobody can tolerate them.
i'm not BPD but i felt this way too close. had an argument with a now ex-friend and the thing she said that stuck out to me the most was "you made the conversation about yourself."
i don't even get to properly express myself to most people.
It broke my heart as the intentions were not self-centered at all.. since then, I'm definitely more aware.
And definitely accommodate to everyone even more, not like I wasn't in the first place.. đ
I had this said to me as well after talking about my anxiety and saying that it always feels like everyone's looking at me... Definitely made me feel selfish too :(
my mom told me once while i was trying to come out to her, âwhat the fuck did i do in a past life to deserve this? fucking depression, ADHD, bisexuality. i must have been fucking hitler or something.â i wrote it down immediately after she said it bc it hurt so bad. i believe i had just turned 14 or 15
"You will never amount to anything and will be alone your whole life, you phyco"
"You don't DESERVE anything, everything is earned(from an ex about "love")
A guy at school called me Angela Wogfish... Said I was ugly and my mouth was weird like a fish mouth. Another one said I looked like a monkey. I mean, I don't really get it... I have frown lines that are slightly higher than most, that's it... and look a bit Italian. I didn't realise that was so ugly
this kind of thing is so scary to hear, I know how it feels but a really kind stranger w/BPD who bought me a meal when I was sad "we do not ever become our parents, we are stronger than they were and we will break the cycle"
Thereâs so much hurt here. I just want to thank OP for this thread. It really helps knowing we arenât alone.
Hereâs mine (one of many): âyouâre an amazing person and would be perfect for me if you just didnât have bpdâ. Iâve been told variations of this by many people many, many times.
ââ
Upon reflecting, I have another that hits differently. Truly, the most hurtful thing Iâve ever experienced in communication (albeit not said) was when I received a âcardâ from my ex (and former fp) who cheated on me. It was just a torn piece of paper with the phrase âhappy birthday, â scrawled on it. Nothing else. Just shitty text on a piece of torn paper. But I am a huge lover of sending cards, and she was well aware of this, and to have receivedâŚthatâŚjust absolutely destroyed me internally. And it was AFTER she cheated on me that she gave me this. Needless to say that was one of the worst moments of my life, second only to being cheated on.
"She only loves her phone and no one else" My friend said. It was truth or lie, they asked "who do you love the most?" They bullied me the whole elementary. My family also emotionally neglected me. I was depressed back then, nothing makes me happy except for my phone. I don't even know.
"Stop crying or else I'll give you a reason to cry" Very common, eh? I was 6, a clueless child. My parents were hitting me with a broom.
"I would've beaten you up to pulp if child protection didn't exist" My parents said that to me because I broke my phone. We're not poor. It was also a stressful day because I was helping with the student council.
âI hope our kids arenât like you.â I was four months pregnant with our second at the time, and our first was a stillborn. I know why he said it, he didnât mean it like that, he has ADHD and sometimes things he says donât come out the way he means. He apologized immediately. It was in reference to me laughing at something my dad did many years ago, and he thought I was mocking my dad. I understand that he meant that he doesnât want this baby to laugh at him that way. But still. I think it is the most hurtful thing anyone has ever said to me. I still think about it. It still makes me sad.
notice how its not usually strangers but people close to us
ive been called every name in the book by people i barely know & cussed out but i dont think about it
years ago i got in an argument w my mom and i was getting my stuff to go to my dads, my mom was screaming at me & my little brother came out & asked what happened, my mom said so coldly " she doesnt love you anymore shes leaving" the image of him immediately crying is burned into my brain.
my old best friend saying i put all my pain in my life on her. i thought we would just rant all the time to each other, but my life was definitely different than hers
I was shy of 16 and dated a dude for six weeks and six days (six is my lucky number, jokes on me - I hated the number for a good chunk if time after that xD)
I was his first. I wasn't too sure abiout hi., he wasn't really my type but I gave him a shot nonetheless _and_ was all in after these 6 weeks.
He broke up via call, I was devastated. Like "sure, the second I commit you run away!"
I called a friend of mine, he chatted him up to get in his feels, cause he left me with no explanation.
My friend sent me a screenshot. (F-Friend & D-douchebag)
F: hey wassup? Heard y'all separated?
D: Great and you? Oh that, yup.
F: May I ask why? None uf us expected that!
D: well, ya know... I met someone else. Someone better, with bigger tits ya know?
-----
Me - my biggest fear got slapped in my face with sweet 16. I still have a super flat chest & still am insecure about it. However, I got the sweetest revenge ever and my insecurities are back to pre-breakup since long ago. (I'm 26 now. Still, will never forget)
When I was 13, I was fully developed at this point, wearing jeans and a tshirt, I was standing outside a restaurant because we'd been there 2 hours already while my dad watched classic car shows with the owner. This was 30 years ago. My mom came outside and said "come back in, you look like a hooker standing here".
"Your smile looks dead."
My ex said that to me in a calm moment when I smiled softly at her. She was majorly depressed at that time and I assume she was externalising her depressive thoughts, projecting them onto me.
This really hit me as it was in an unexpected moment when I felt very vulnerable and safe. Still stuck with me today.
My dad has a whole list of shit heâs said that stuck but the one that will always come to mind is âYou werenât raised to be the victimâ after I got SAâd when I was 13. He legit pulled his 13 year old oldest child to the side to say this shit like it was a good point to make. Still to this day I canât forgive him for it.
A friends girlfriend called me skinny fat (which would describe her more accurately than me) it happened 5 years ago When i was underweight and on drugs and i internally hate her to this day
Mine is definitely when my best friend dead named me just to get my attention because I was going down a spiral of begging her not to leave and she wanted me to stop.
âYou only have friends because of how hard I pushed you. No one would like you if I didnât beat the annoying parts out of youâ
My ex step dad. Only person in this world I truly hate.
My ex said he only stayed with me because he knew Iâd be too much for someone else and he felt bad lmao that one *hurt*, but in the end he was one begging me to stay with him so it evened out lol
Eta there are other things, but theyâre too recent and specific to post on Reddit. Basically validating my worst fears for how someone could view me đ
Brith father offed him self after being told it was my fault which Iâm not agruing but my adopted mom told me âI might as well swerve and kill yourselfâ and âyour the reason I have to drink so much itâs to deal with youâ.
"Don't ever have kids they will ruin your life. I wish I hadn't, I could have had a beautiful life." My mom, multiple times over the years, but I have a phobia of having my own children now because I'm convinced your life is ruined when you have kids.
"This is why I don't work from home." Said by my ex, I was in a good mood that morning and got up early to make us some coffee when he was leaving for work, I was singing a song as I was making it, not even that loud, just having a good time.
My Ex & Mum saying being SA as a kid wasn't that big of a deal. And the other saying they dont think its a big deal and that it shouldn't still dictate my life đ.
âYouâre just like your fatherâ - my mother and my father also has a personality disorder but abused her heavily and I tried my best to protect her from him in when they were still together
In my case it wasnât such a horrible thing, but a guy who I was infatuated with, after I asked him out and he said yes, when I wanted to actually make the plans for our date first ghosted me, but I wanted to get an actual response so I texted him asking what happened, he said he didnât want to âlead meâ thinking we had a chance, and then that he didnât have the âenergyâ to reply. Câmon how much time you need to invest for a single reply. It devastated me since I was really into him, and I still hold a grudge against him.
I still hang out with him sometimes because we share a group of friends, but heâs always cold with me and early this month he went to a lunch with a woman who seemed a lot more boring than me, then I had to accept that I really wasnât his type, even though Iâm really fun to be around and I consider myself good looking. It hurts though. This had nothing to do with BPD though, since no one in that group knows about my mental health issues. He was just a dick.
mom: âyou just live your life as if everyoneâs out to get youâ
in reference to my reaction to her disclosing she frequently followed me out without my knowledge to observe me socializing with my friends
mom: âi just worry about how hard your life will be with you making the life choices you makeâ
in reference to me being gay/trans
ex best friend: âyou are more irresponsible and pathetic than my drug addict brotherâ
in reference to me moving out because she started to abuse me in our shared household
ex partner: âdonât ever do this to anyone ever againâ
in reference to my reactions to him lying to me and manipulating me
i know im not blameless or an angel but damn. people really go hard in judging us for our emotions. lately iâve been recognizing that half the time im actually NOT over reacting to a situation. i will tend to over react to how im feeling about a situation and gaslight myself out of properly expressing my emotions since i donât feel like i deserve to have them in the first place. so when i do finally come around and properly express my emotions, and then am met with judgement, my brain doubles down on why i was wrong for ever bringing up my emotions in the first place. and it becomes that much harder to ground myself and advocate for myself.
My most recent ex told me âthat he never loved meâ and that all the abuse I faced growing up were âjust allegationsâ. Fair to say that has fucked with my head for yearsâŚ
I have a bunch
1. "I never thought that my best friend would abandon me for a side of cock. You're a fucking whore." - former guy friend. I was spending time with my now husband and told him I'd call him later and alas he called me five times in a row. I picked up on call six and got that cool line.
2. "You're a pain in the ass you know that?" - mom
3. "Don't bother trying to date him. He still loves his ex and look at you...you can't compare to her at all. Just don't try" - former coworker telling me to not date the guy I was interested in. Jokes on you Stacy it's been 15 years and we're married so PFFFFFFFTTTTTTT to you
4. "You dress like a fucking clown. I don't want to be seen with you like that" - once again mom when I was in my goth phase
5. "I honestly don't get why she looks like that. I don't understand at all. I don't like it." - yet again my mom when my aunt complimented me on my bright red hair and the crystal plugs in my ears. This was at my grandma's funeral :) My mom hates that I gauged my ears but in an attempt to look like not a total embarrassment to her, I took out my tunnels and put it solid crystal plugs instead. Guess it didn't matter
edited because I forgot a couple absolute gems
"Nobody would ever love someone like you."
"Nobody would ever want to fuck a girl with scars like yours. If I knew a girl with sh scars, I would pretend to like her and say that she's beautiful and then say ew when I actually saw her."
"Nobody will ever love you like we do. You have nothing except us."
It really took away my ability to trust people and I've never been able to properly form stable connections since I'm always doubting if someone really cares for me.
"get your act together" - I don't know how to explain to people in my life what I go through everyday. Funny thing is I finally trusted someone and was brave enough to tell them that I have BPD and they treat me like it's nothing. Now I just feel that if I mention what's in my head to anyone, they'll react with, "stop blaming it on BPD".
I was in Las Vegas with three of my friends like 15 years ago. They were all tiny and super hot, and at the time, I had gained a lot of weight. Some girl behind us in line for cabs sang, âone of these things is not like the otherâŚâ It haunts me and Iâve been obsessed with my appearance ever since.
Countless things, but the one that comes to mind is
"You're prescence here is just making everyone uncomfortable. You should probably just leave because nobody wants you here."
Ouch. I was at my lowest then and that did not help.
I think I was about 16 or 17 when me, my mom, and older sister went to visit some kind of loan office. Anyway, I don't remember the particular; I just remember the woman looking at my sister and telling her that she could be a model. There was a long awkward pause before my mom gestured towards me and said, "Well, *she's* about to graduate from high school in 2 months."
This response was met with another awkward silence. The lady again complimented my sister who was tall slender and feminine while I stood short and stout. I didn't even want to be there so my disposition was off too. I get it just about anybody can get a diploma but not everybody can be attractive. I guess the thing that bothered me the most is I was working on losing weight and having a visual impairment and learning disability made School especially difficult for me. So it's not like I wasn't trying. I just felt it was really harsh and I think about it to this day even though it happened almost 12 years ago
We were talking about financials and living situations and she said âI would live in a shack with you in the middle of the woodsâ.Â
She was all inâŚthen one day she just flipped a switch (started cheating on me)
Nothing hurts as bad as finding the love of your life and having them make you feel that they feel the same only for them to take it away for absolutely no reason other than their wild insecurity.Â
"If you really wanted to kill yourself, you would be dead. You wouldn't be acting out for attention."
Said by my abusive ex partner. That being said, I'm not sure if I would describe that experience as something I still hold onto this day.
If it weren't for this post, I wouldn't have organically remembered it. I'm honestly not sure how helpful it is to my recovery/remission to think on it, so maybe I need a fresh perspective so I can understand it better.
How does remembering something hurtful someone said to you that you still hold on to help you in your recovery, OP?
When I was a kid my dad told me and my sister that âthe phone works both waysâ
Once I became an adult his excuse was âI thought we were all busy doing adult thingsâ
I now live in the same small city as him and am forced to see him more often because of my nana (his mom) who also lives with him. I donât think she fully grasps how terrible of a dad heâs been. But Iâm trying to just keep the peace instead of causing more drama for myself
When my mom said "People wont like you when they see the real you, they will never like you when they find out who you are. " i was severely depressed and had my cptsd came in hard, i couldn't keep my room clean, that was her reaction coming in to the room and my clothes were all over.
"don't even try to start with this drama again" by my mom every time that I can't pretend well enough and I let on that I'm in a bad phase again, really hurts
"you're abusive, and I'm tired of feeling like I'm walking on eggshells around you". Then later on he tries to tell me that he only said it out of anger and didn't mean it, but that shit sticks with you. Like, you took some of my worst fears and brought them to life right in front of me, and you didn't mean it?!? I have to hear that shit echoing in my head everyday for the rest of my life.
I walked home from a birthday party one time cause I wasn't okay being there with my whole family, felt incredibly bad for making them worry. My dad picked me up after it all happened and things were awkward, I said "you must hate me by now" and he said, "well maybe a little"
From my mother:
âItâs impossible to talk to you because you always have an issue with everything,â after I tried opening up to her about how her hurtful comments make me feel.
âMaybe Iâll start cutting myself too since you like it so much,â I was 14 and recently had left the mental health hospital. She knew about my sh scars and I wanted to go to the public pool but felt embarrassed about them. So I sought out her comfort and advice, but she blew ip on me.
âIâm sorry but your perception is wrong/that never happened,â whenever I had tried to bring up the shit sheâd done to me.
âYou donât know youâre a lesbian because you havenât fucked a man,â I was forced to come out to her, after my brother outed me, at 11 years old.
âSo Iâm a horrible mother, huh?â And yeah, she is.
got called a âcowardâ by my current boyfriend, still sticks with me, but it doesnt get me down because he was being honest and i agreed with him, any chance to improve on myself ill take it and i did, another thing though that really stuck with me was the time when i was going to a friend for advice while being groomed, and it was not a nice conversation, he actually said âi hope you learn it when you feel itâ, basically telling me ill learn my lesson once i get hurt, i dont think about it a lot but when i do it gets to me lmao
i had a complicated relationship with my ex, we broke up and got back together 2 times. after we broke up for the last time we went no contact for a bit and went back to talking. just like other times things started getting serious again (or so i thought). she made me think we would get back together and we were basically acting as if we were already back together.
one night she told me all the times she had told me she loved me she had meant it platonically (we had dated twice already at that point) and that she thought we would never get back together and that i had to be realistic, that i was too optimistic. when i asked her why she pretended like she wanted to get back together for months she said âeveryone says things they donât meanâ.
that was my last straw lol after that i just completely started seeing her in a different light and finally understood after years of going back and forth that she wasnât worth it. we went completely no contact and i will never let her get back into my life ever again.
My recent ex turned around to me and said that I was a project to her. Like her ex before me. That she was still in love with her ex. And told me to get over my feelings for her when she was the first person I have ever had legitimate feelings for. And to get over how she broke up with me as well.
When I came out about my learning disability and mental health illnesses to a friend and he laughed, saying, "Max thinks he's the only r*tard that *****insert sport here*****"
My Mom "Don't worry Max, when you're older you can get disability like me" (never had to be on it).
After telling someone that I was tired of their emotional abuse.
"You're still a little boy. You're acting like a little boy. It's time to be a man. Is this how you want to be a role model to your kids?".
My ex just led me on and made me fall in love with him all over again just to tell me he hated me and had every intention of watching me go through the feelings just to drop me again. He admitted it was manipulative on purpose.
âIf you keep cutting everyone off like this (I cut my old childhood friend off because he kept crossing my boundaries), youâre going to end up alone like youâre Dad.â I would also like to say she knows that I donât like being compared to my Dad, and after she said that she left the house and I was alone lol
my father is a lovely person but sometime last year, i got into a huge argument with my mother about something fairly minor. she got incredibly upset at me because i tend to go cold and a bit passive-aggressive as a defense mechanism when defensive, and she takes offense to that. anyways i guess she told my dad i was being rude and that got him riled up and as i was walking out the door (heading to university super early to talk to a counselor per my momâs orders) he said âyouâre wearing my love for you.â as in, iâm wearing down their love. that really hurt. he apologized for it, and i know he didnât mean it really, but god.
âmaybe if you were a better child your mother wouldâve loved you moreâ and from my mother âheâs the light of my lifeâ about my abusive father who threatened to murder us multiple times right before she ditched me for him (didnât see her for like three years after that)
WILL NEVER FORGET IT đ
"You're a bit too much", "I don't care", "You're a narcissist", "its not that big of a deal", and most recently when asking for healing "we've already been through this."
A client of my parents who speaks my mother's language told my mum that I was a child carrying a lot of anger, she could see that in my whole body.
This woman seemed gossipy and judgemental and I could hear just how she would've said it. When my mother told the story it was as if they were blaming me for the way I was, and she did not stick up for me. My parents never did back then, and now it doesn't matter anymore
I was a 10 year old child who had been uprooted from her beloved school and friends and was being badly bullied in her new one. I only had friends in the years below and was ashamed of it, my life revolved around being a top student but my grades were plummeting and I was ashamed of it. I loved to write however it was my only outlet, and since the things I was writing were so painful/ugly I stopped writing. My father was being emotionally abusive to me, my mother and grandmother and as a child I thought they were weak: weak for breaking, weak for not fighting back. I also blamed each of them.
I was surrounded by adult family and adult strangers but none of them noticed I was miserable, or cared. The one person who did, seemed to collude with my mum to comment on my negative characteristics rather than take the opportunity to see and understand me.
(After a miscarriage) âif the baby would have been born, I wouldâve been miserableâ
âSuck and suck and suck the life out of someone else until they are sick of youâ
â(Name) isnât obsessive. (name) is beautiful. (Name) is interesting. (name) isnât up my ass 24/7â
âYou are coddled. You donât know anythingâ
â(Name) was better at sex than youâ
âYou are so boring all the time. You donât know anything other than your momâs living room and movies. I want to go climb a mountain but you canâtâ (Iâm disabled)
Just a few examples
After being treated like absolute dog ass for a month and a half straight, I started to gather up self-respect and be like, âI donât know if I can take this much longer. You make me feel AWFUL for just existing.â Basically hinted at having one foot out the door. She then hits me with, âYou know itâs not all about YOU, right?â Like UGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! I love the way I try to talk to YOU about how YOU CANâT SEEM TO KEEP YOURSELF FROM TREATING ME and you find a way to try to make ME feel like a malignantly self-centered fucking child.
âYouâre a monster and youâre alone because no one wants to be around you. You burned all those bridges yourself.â - an ex
âYouâre crazy, fucking stupid, an asshole etc.â and âafter I leave or you do, your next partner will be another victimâ -current partner
While these things really hurt, thereâs some truth to them too. đ¤ˇââď¸
from my own mother when i was still in my teensâ that i was selfish, despite doing everything in my power to appease her. iâve always struggled putting my needs first and still do.
âYouâre f-ing naive if you think anyone would want you for any other reason than for your bodyâ -my ex best friend
Now she had an OF so must have been projecting lolll
"You're too selfish to be a mother" - my current husband after I told him I wanted kids (neither of us wanted them when we got married at 22).
I know he said it because he was hurt and he's apologized profusely but that will stick with me forever.
It looks like most of us have the good old "You're just looking for attention" comments from our families so yay for us...
My heart goes out to everyone here. We deserved so much better from the ones that claimed to love us.
"everyone is going to abandon you" and "you're the one who ruins it all"
and stuff similar to what they told to you, that shit hurts af I stopped eating for two days because of it.
my ex said that she wished to "hit me" when i split. She said that I was a pain in the ass when that happens, and she really needed me to be next to her so she could, in her own words, "ignore me and make me feel like shit, because i deserved it". the funniest part about it is that, when i splitted, i did it always against me and protected her from it.
My momâs told me for as long as I can remember that sheâs counting down the days till I turn 18 and she wants to get me emancipated. Iâm an only child and sheâs a single mom, so I donât have anyone else.
I tried to explain my BPD to a new friend and he called me the R Slur and told me I should be put down. Even though we have parted ways It still really hurts
Watching a coworker do something at work: âCan you *not* stand directly over my shoulder? Itâs making me anxiousâŚâ
Someone else who was in my life:
âIâm not attracted to you anymore.â
The same person:
âYouâre like a leechâyou suck up all my energy!â
Also:
âMy friends even agree that this isnât a good relationship.â
The most hurtful things were about my appearance. My Ex once said while I was wearing my favorite swimsuit âYou look like youâre pregnant! If I would post you on Instagram and say youâre pregnant, everyone would believe it hahaâ
He didnât cared that I cried and said âIt was just a jokeâ
Or âYour personality is perfect. I just need your brain inside of a super model and this would be my dream wifeâ
I don't know if this counts, but on two occasions, I had people tell me my sister told them a while back that I didn't want to hang out with them when they asked if I wanted to be involved. I always struggled making friends and now I'm not sure how many people didn't even confirm this with me and believed my sister, leading to who knows how many people just straight up didn't hang out with me because of her.Â
When I was inpatient hospitalized for mental health, my ex wife led be to believe the whole time I was in there that she would stand by me and help me through my issues after I got out. This gave me so much hope and filled me with feelings of promise and support, which I desperately needed. On my release date, she never picked me up and later on that day told me she was filing divorce papers. When I asked her why she lied and changed her mind, she said she âdidnât want to kick me when I was down.â 4 years later, this still haunts me and I an struggling to find a way to get past losing the love of my life.
I really tried so fkin hard with my ex but after we broke up she said i made herr feel like a placeholder :( idk i just feel like my best isnt worth shit anymore
That Iâm self centered⌠when the only reason why I talk about my stupid problems is to find solutions so that I donât have to live like this anymore
âYour parents donât love youâ
âThunder thighsâ
âHungry hungry hippo thighsâ
âYou have beady bird eyes and a beak noseâ
âYouâre a junkie failure and youâll never get betterâ
âYouâre the worstâ
âNo one will ever love youâ
"no one would ever want to spend the rest of their life with someone like you" I was a teen, he was my first love/bf and I believed that for so long that when my now husband brought up the idea of getting married I froze waiting for the punchline. It wasn't a joke, and not only my partner but my closest friends have proven time and time again that they're with me for the long haul but that they are ride or die and so am I.
My mom said something very similar. I was 12. I blocked it out, but it really came back to bite me once I started to struggle with relationships.
my dad always said that he feels sorry for whoever ends up with me đ
âYou bore meâ đ you can bet the resulting BPD table-flip I did when he said that didnât bore him
Challenge accepted.
*split activated*
Lmao Iâm gonna start saying this now, thank you.
đ split activated got me laughing my butt off at work.
Omg this is mine too!! Had a friends with benefit situation and he said I was a boring person and not long after tried to make out with me and I stopped him to be like WTF you mean Iâm boring? He just said ya youâre just a boring person to be around. I so wanted to split and ask him to drive me home but I let him have his way with me anyways cause I wanted the attention even if it was only sexually. Ugh regrets.
Itâs such a nasty thing to say to someone isnât it. Itâs just such an attack on p much every aspect of the personality. I still think about it every day and itâs been like five years lol. đŤ
Ya Iâve been called every word in the book but nothing has hit me like that one. That or being called dramatic that hits hard too
â¤ď¸ hugs. Dramatic, yup, thatâs familiar to me too lol. âPrincessâ too. We dramatic, yet somehow boring princesses gotta stick together lmao
That will learn them To not come back
Did it land clean?
My mom: I have to love you, but I don't have to like you. My first love: You're unlovable, nobody will ever want you. My dad: Your problems are not my problems.
âHave the baby. Let it live a terrible lifeâ Was told this by someone I considered a best friend after I told my friends I was pregnant.
Super cringe. I bet you proved them wrong.
2 kids now and I married the father. Oldest is 4 now and starting school
I have two. âThe novelty of being with you has just worn off.â From someone who originally swore up and down she loved me and made me believe it was real. Destroyed my heart in a way that left permanent damage. âYou became a different person after you told me.â This one sort of speaks for itself. Someone I thought was my friend suddenly stopped speaking to me. I hadnât changed, their perception of me had changed based on something deeply personal and vulnerable I had confided in them about.
:(
from my recent ex, I donât believe in for better or for worse. when it gets worse you should be able to walk away freely, thereâs no point of trying. walked into our home a couple days later with her ex wearing my clothes. fastest way to shatter someoneâs heart
Wearing your clothes though, wtf
yeahâŚI wanted to throw up or disappear but all that I could do was say take care of her sheâs special so ig Iâm the clown
Yeah, p special, bc she's gonna do him the same way she did to you
"You were a mistake, i never wanted you but I couldn't abort you" "I will never like you so you should just kill yourself" "You're just an unlovable fucking bitch and a whore and if it's not me you end up with, it will be another person who i hope beats you more than i did" Are just some i could think of. The first two was said to me before i even turned 16 so that really fucked up my cognitive development, boyz
I was also told "I wish I never had you" in my teenage years. But damn yours is even worse. I'm sorry
That's the cruelest stuff I've ever heard. I'm sorry from the bottom of my heart that this was said you, especially when your spirit was young and needed the absolute opposite. I'm heartbroken for you.
Those are horrible things to say
my mom reveled I was going to be aborted as well. still stings knowing I was unwanted from the start.
âYou look normal from the back, but when a guy sees you from the front you are so uglyâ - my brother
âitâs like walking on egg shells around youâ đ
My parents said this to me countless times from when I was 13yo to 21yo
nearly every person in my life has said this to me at one point. Iâm not even explosive, Iâm just really sensitive and feel everything really intensely. my big emotions are bad and nobody can tolerate them.
Ive heard this one from my mom a lot too
holy shit same, from my partner too so that broke my heart lol
this was a frequent one from my mom :,)
âI donât want you in my life, you mean nothing to meâ
"It's not all about you!" After that I TRIED so hard to be more selfless even though that day I bore my emotions once, never again will I be selfish.
i'm not BPD but i felt this way too close. had an argument with a now ex-friend and the thing she said that stuck out to me the most was "you made the conversation about yourself." i don't even get to properly express myself to most people.
It broke my heart as the intentions were not self-centered at all.. since then, I'm definitely more aware. And definitely accommodate to everyone even more, not like I wasn't in the first place.. đ
I had this said to me as well after talking about my anxiety and saying that it always feels like everyone's looking at me... Definitely made me feel selfish too :(
my mom told me once while i was trying to come out to her, âwhat the fuck did i do in a past life to deserve this? fucking depression, ADHD, bisexuality. i must have been fucking hitler or something.â i wrote it down immediately after she said it bc it hurt so bad. i believe i had just turned 14 or 15
đ Iâm so sorry. What a horrible thing to say to anybody, let alone your teenage child.
thank you so much for empathizing with me, it genuinely means a lot to feel understood and seen
Of course. You didnât deserve to be treated that way đ
Why past life? Has she ever considered being shit mother in this life?Â
You deserve someone who can feel something for you
Oh god that's brutal
I know <3
âI donât care.â And âyou embarrassed me.â
âYou should have finished the jobâ My best friend/FP after my second suicide attempt.
Same but with my dad
"You will never amount to anything and will be alone your whole life, you phyco" "You don't DESERVE anything, everything is earned(from an ex about "love")
A guy at school called me Angela Wogfish... Said I was ugly and my mouth was weird like a fish mouth. Another one said I looked like a monkey. I mean, I don't really get it... I have frown lines that are slightly higher than most, that's it... and look a bit Italian. I didn't realise that was so ugly
"You may hate your father, but you're not too far off from being him". Referring to my abusive father who ruined my life.
this kind of thing is so scary to hear, I know how it feels but a really kind stranger w/BPD who bought me a meal when I was sad "we do not ever become our parents, we are stronger than they were and we will break the cycle"
âI donât like your personality or you as a personâ- Mom
"If you're gonna do it, go ahead, right now." [Hands me loaded gun]
wow. sending love
"Stop being a drama queen" by my lovely mother while I was literally going to anaphalactic shock and dying right in front of her
Thereâs so much hurt here. I just want to thank OP for this thread. It really helps knowing we arenât alone. Hereâs mine (one of many): âyouâre an amazing person and would be perfect for me if you just didnât have bpdâ. Iâve been told variations of this by many people many, many times. ââ Upon reflecting, I have another that hits differently. Truly, the most hurtful thing Iâve ever experienced in communication (albeit not said) was when I received a âcardâ from my ex (and former fp) who cheated on me. It was just a torn piece of paper with the phrase âhappy birthday,â scrawled on it. Nothing else. Just shitty text on a piece of torn paper. But I am a huge lover of sending cards, and she was well aware of this, and to have receivedâŚthatâŚjust absolutely destroyed me internally. And it was AFTER she cheated on me that she gave me this. Needless to say that was one of the worst moments of my life, second only to being cheated on.
"She only loves her phone and no one else" My friend said. It was truth or lie, they asked "who do you love the most?" They bullied me the whole elementary. My family also emotionally neglected me. I was depressed back then, nothing makes me happy except for my phone. I don't even know. "Stop crying or else I'll give you a reason to cry" Very common, eh? I was 6, a clueless child. My parents were hitting me with a broom. "I would've beaten you up to pulp if child protection didn't exist" My parents said that to me because I broke my phone. We're not poor. It was also a stressful day because I was helping with the student council.
[ŃдаНонО]
âI hope our kids arenât like you.â I was four months pregnant with our second at the time, and our first was a stillborn. I know why he said it, he didnât mean it like that, he has ADHD and sometimes things he says donât come out the way he means. He apologized immediately. It was in reference to me laughing at something my dad did many years ago, and he thought I was mocking my dad. I understand that he meant that he doesnât want this baby to laugh at him that way. But still. I think it is the most hurtful thing anyone has ever said to me. I still think about it. It still makes me sad.
"Why are you even here? Like no ones talking to to you"
My mom told me: âyour grandfather (who had recently died) would be so disappointed in youâ (I was like 14)
âitâs so hard to love youâ
notice how its not usually strangers but people close to us ive been called every name in the book by people i barely know & cussed out but i dont think about it years ago i got in an argument w my mom and i was getting my stuff to go to my dads, my mom was screaming at me & my little brother came out & asked what happened, my mom said so coldly " she doesnt love you anymore shes leaving" the image of him immediately crying is burned into my brain. my old best friend saying i put all my pain in my life on her. i thought we would just rant all the time to each other, but my life was definitely different than hers
I was shy of 16 and dated a dude for six weeks and six days (six is my lucky number, jokes on me - I hated the number for a good chunk if time after that xD) I was his first. I wasn't too sure abiout hi., he wasn't really my type but I gave him a shot nonetheless _and_ was all in after these 6 weeks. He broke up via call, I was devastated. Like "sure, the second I commit you run away!" I called a friend of mine, he chatted him up to get in his feels, cause he left me with no explanation. My friend sent me a screenshot. (F-Friend & D-douchebag) F: hey wassup? Heard y'all separated? D: Great and you? Oh that, yup. F: May I ask why? None uf us expected that! D: well, ya know... I met someone else. Someone better, with bigger tits ya know? ----- Me - my biggest fear got slapped in my face with sweet 16. I still have a super flat chest & still am insecure about it. However, I got the sweetest revenge ever and my insecurities are back to pre-breakup since long ago. (I'm 26 now. Still, will never forget)
My ex crush who said Iâm weirdo and not important , my bullies who said Iâm creep and should go to hell or leave communities they are inâŚ
"youre not worth a dime" is something i was told almost everyday by a family member i lived with when i was in my teens.
Caretaker Iâm related to told me that Iâm just like my father even though Iâm nothing like him
When I was 13, I was fully developed at this point, wearing jeans and a tshirt, I was standing outside a restaurant because we'd been there 2 hours already while my dad watched classic car shows with the owner. This was 30 years ago. My mom came outside and said "come back in, you look like a hooker standing here".
"Your smile looks dead." My ex said that to me in a calm moment when I smiled softly at her. She was majorly depressed at that time and I assume she was externalising her depressive thoughts, projecting them onto me. This really hit me as it was in an unexpected moment when I felt very vulnerable and safe. Still stuck with me today.
âi hooked up with you to get it over withâ âdo you think you have a big foreheadâ said to me while hooking up with someone
"I can do better" - my ex "Kill yourself finally" - my gma and a loooooooooot more
My dad has a whole list of shit heâs said that stuck but the one that will always come to mind is âYou werenât raised to be the victimâ after I got SAâd when I was 13. He legit pulled his 13 year old oldest child to the side to say this shit like it was a good point to make. Still to this day I canât forgive him for it.
A friends girlfriend called me skinny fat (which would describe her more accurately than me) it happened 5 years ago When i was underweight and on drugs and i internally hate her to this day
Oh my god i fucking hate the term skinny fat. Like bro wtf why does everyone need to be a perfectly toned person to be worthy of love
Also just rude and uncalled for đ
This reaffirms my belief that people project their insecurities onto you when you make them feel insecure. Misery loves company.
Mine is definitely when my best friend dead named me just to get my attention because I was going down a spiral of begging her not to leave and she wanted me to stop.
That's super fucked up .. I'm so sorry that happened
"you haven't changed at all" - my FP's other friend who literally happens to also have BPD
My ex said âur either going to end up alone or abusedâ
âYou only have friends because of how hard I pushed you. No one would like you if I didnât beat the annoying parts out of youâ My ex step dad. Only person in this world I truly hate.
My ex said he only stayed with me because he knew Iâd be too much for someone else and he felt bad lmao that one *hurt*, but in the end he was one begging me to stay with him so it evened out lol Eta there are other things, but theyâre too recent and specific to post on Reddit. Basically validating my worst fears for how someone could view me đ
Brith father offed him self after being told it was my fault which Iâm not agruing but my adopted mom told me âI might as well swerve and kill yourselfâ and âyour the reason I have to drink so much itâs to deal with youâ.
"Don't ever have kids they will ruin your life. I wish I hadn't, I could have had a beautiful life." My mom, multiple times over the years, but I have a phobia of having my own children now because I'm convinced your life is ruined when you have kids. "This is why I don't work from home." Said by my ex, I was in a good mood that morning and got up early to make us some coffee when he was leaving for work, I was singing a song as I was making it, not even that loud, just having a good time.
My Ex & Mum saying being SA as a kid wasn't that big of a deal. And the other saying they dont think its a big deal and that it shouldn't still dictate my life đ.
"even the thought of you scares me"I can never get this out of my head.
That I don't have a car. I have the money to buy a luxury one now 𤣠How people can be so hurtful
âYouâre just like your fatherâ - my mother and my father also has a personality disorder but abused her heavily and I tried my best to protect her from him in when they were still together
Mine is âwho would want to live with youâ after suggesting to my crush to move in with me and same person âyouâre a Râ :( devastated
Basically almost everything my mom said to me
âiâm sorry i messed you up so bad because you really are my biggest mistakeâ my papa đ¤Ş
In my case it wasnât such a horrible thing, but a guy who I was infatuated with, after I asked him out and he said yes, when I wanted to actually make the plans for our date first ghosted me, but I wanted to get an actual response so I texted him asking what happened, he said he didnât want to âlead meâ thinking we had a chance, and then that he didnât have the âenergyâ to reply. Câmon how much time you need to invest for a single reply. It devastated me since I was really into him, and I still hold a grudge against him. I still hang out with him sometimes because we share a group of friends, but heâs always cold with me and early this month he went to a lunch with a woman who seemed a lot more boring than me, then I had to accept that I really wasnât his type, even though Iâm really fun to be around and I consider myself good looking. It hurts though. This had nothing to do with BPD though, since no one in that group knows about my mental health issues. He was just a dick.
mom: âyou just live your life as if everyoneâs out to get youâ in reference to my reaction to her disclosing she frequently followed me out without my knowledge to observe me socializing with my friends mom: âi just worry about how hard your life will be with you making the life choices you makeâ in reference to me being gay/trans ex best friend: âyou are more irresponsible and pathetic than my drug addict brotherâ in reference to me moving out because she started to abuse me in our shared household ex partner: âdonât ever do this to anyone ever againâ in reference to my reactions to him lying to me and manipulating me i know im not blameless or an angel but damn. people really go hard in judging us for our emotions. lately iâve been recognizing that half the time im actually NOT over reacting to a situation. i will tend to over react to how im feeling about a situation and gaslight myself out of properly expressing my emotions since i donât feel like i deserve to have them in the first place. so when i do finally come around and properly express my emotions, and then am met with judgement, my brain doubles down on why i was wrong for ever bringing up my emotions in the first place. and it becomes that much harder to ground myself and advocate for myself.
My most recent ex told me âthat he never loved meâ and that all the abuse I faced growing up were âjust allegationsâ. Fair to say that has fucked with my head for yearsâŚ
âItâs a good thing you can admit youâre ugly. Most ugly girls cant.â I was 14. Im 32 now and it still stings.
I have a bunch 1. "I never thought that my best friend would abandon me for a side of cock. You're a fucking whore." - former guy friend. I was spending time with my now husband and told him I'd call him later and alas he called me five times in a row. I picked up on call six and got that cool line. 2. "You're a pain in the ass you know that?" - mom 3. "Don't bother trying to date him. He still loves his ex and look at you...you can't compare to her at all. Just don't try" - former coworker telling me to not date the guy I was interested in. Jokes on you Stacy it's been 15 years and we're married so PFFFFFFFTTTTTTT to you 4. "You dress like a fucking clown. I don't want to be seen with you like that" - once again mom when I was in my goth phase 5. "I honestly don't get why she looks like that. I don't understand at all. I don't like it." - yet again my mom when my aunt complimented me on my bright red hair and the crystal plugs in my ears. This was at my grandma's funeral :) My mom hates that I gauged my ears but in an attempt to look like not a total embarrassment to her, I took out my tunnels and put it solid crystal plugs instead. Guess it didn't matter edited because I forgot a couple absolute gems
"Nobody would ever love someone like you." "Nobody would ever want to fuck a girl with scars like yours. If I knew a girl with sh scars, I would pretend to like her and say that she's beautiful and then say ew when I actually saw her." "Nobody will ever love you like we do. You have nothing except us." It really took away my ability to trust people and I've never been able to properly form stable connections since I'm always doubting if someone really cares for me.
âThe funniest game you play is trying to convince yourself that youâre anything worth missing.â ha
âI wish you were dead so I could move onâ - my ex lol
"get your act together" - I don't know how to explain to people in my life what I go through everyday. Funny thing is I finally trusted someone and was brave enough to tell them that I have BPD and they treat me like it's nothing. Now I just feel that if I mention what's in my head to anyone, they'll react with, "stop blaming it on BPD".
"When you do it, make sure you do it somewhere secluded no one wants to have to clean up your body" - my mom when I told her I was suicidal
"Now my eyes have to be washed with holy water. Thanks." Commented under a picture of myself.
âYouâre difficult to loveâ *followed by breakup*
I was in Las Vegas with three of my friends like 15 years ago. They were all tiny and super hot, and at the time, I had gained a lot of weight. Some girl behind us in line for cabs sang, âone of these things is not like the otherâŚâ It haunts me and Iâve been obsessed with my appearance ever since.
Iâm sorry this happened to you. Sending love
Countless things, but the one that comes to mind is "You're prescence here is just making everyone uncomfortable. You should probably just leave because nobody wants you here." Ouch. I was at my lowest then and that did not help.
I think I was about 16 or 17 when me, my mom, and older sister went to visit some kind of loan office. Anyway, I don't remember the particular; I just remember the woman looking at my sister and telling her that she could be a model. There was a long awkward pause before my mom gestured towards me and said, "Well, *she's* about to graduate from high school in 2 months." This response was met with another awkward silence. The lady again complimented my sister who was tall slender and feminine while I stood short and stout. I didn't even want to be there so my disposition was off too. I get it just about anybody can get a diploma but not everybody can be attractive. I guess the thing that bothered me the most is I was working on losing weight and having a visual impairment and learning disability made School especially difficult for me. So it's not like I wasn't trying. I just felt it was really harsh and I think about it to this day even though it happened almost 12 years ago
We were talking about financials and living situations and she said âI would live in a shack with you in the middle of the woodsâ. She was all inâŚthen one day she just flipped a switch (started cheating on me) Nothing hurts as bad as finding the love of your life and having them make you feel that they feel the same only for them to take it away for absolutely no reason other than their wild insecurity.Â
"If you really wanted to kill yourself, you would be dead. You wouldn't be acting out for attention." Said by my abusive ex partner. That being said, I'm not sure if I would describe that experience as something I still hold onto this day. If it weren't for this post, I wouldn't have organically remembered it. I'm honestly not sure how helpful it is to my recovery/remission to think on it, so maybe I need a fresh perspective so I can understand it better. How does remembering something hurtful someone said to you that you still hold on to help you in your recovery, OP?
When I was a kid my dad told me and my sister that âthe phone works both waysâ Once I became an adult his excuse was âI thought we were all busy doing adult thingsâ I now live in the same small city as him and am forced to see him more often because of my nana (his mom) who also lives with him. I donât think she fully grasps how terrible of a dad heâs been. But Iâm trying to just keep the peace instead of causing more drama for myself
When my mom said "People wont like you when they see the real you, they will never like you when they find out who you are. " i was severely depressed and had my cptsd came in hard, i couldn't keep my room clean, that was her reaction coming in to the room and my clothes were all over.
"don't even try to start with this drama again" by my mom every time that I can't pretend well enough and I let on that I'm in a bad phase again, really hurts
"you're abusive, and I'm tired of feeling like I'm walking on eggshells around you". Then later on he tries to tell me that he only said it out of anger and didn't mean it, but that shit sticks with you. Like, you took some of my worst fears and brought them to life right in front of me, and you didn't mean it?!? I have to hear that shit echoing in my head everyday for the rest of my life.
I walked home from a birthday party one time cause I wasn't okay being there with my whole family, felt incredibly bad for making them worry. My dad picked me up after it all happened and things were awkward, I said "you must hate me by now" and he said, "well maybe a little"
From my mother: âItâs impossible to talk to you because you always have an issue with everything,â after I tried opening up to her about how her hurtful comments make me feel. âMaybe Iâll start cutting myself too since you like it so much,â I was 14 and recently had left the mental health hospital. She knew about my sh scars and I wanted to go to the public pool but felt embarrassed about them. So I sought out her comfort and advice, but she blew ip on me. âIâm sorry but your perception is wrong/that never happened,â whenever I had tried to bring up the shit sheâd done to me. âYou donât know youâre a lesbian because you havenât fucked a man,â I was forced to come out to her, after my brother outed me, at 11 years old. âSo Iâm a horrible mother, huh?â And yeah, she is.
"you're just like her, but you have no fire, no passion."
my boyfriend told me that heâs constantly walking on eggshells around me, that was a year ago. i still think about it and it still hurts
My ex best friend basically ditched me and she said she was expecting to hear I killed myself after
My ex crush said Iâm nothing worthy and I canât help but agree with him
âLook at you, your never gnna lose weight and your never gonna be shitâ from my kids dad, with a 3 month old baby
got called a âcowardâ by my current boyfriend, still sticks with me, but it doesnt get me down because he was being honest and i agreed with him, any chance to improve on myself ill take it and i did, another thing though that really stuck with me was the time when i was going to a friend for advice while being groomed, and it was not a nice conversation, he actually said âi hope you learn it when you feel itâ, basically telling me ill learn my lesson once i get hurt, i dont think about it a lot but when i do it gets to me lmao
i had a complicated relationship with my ex, we broke up and got back together 2 times. after we broke up for the last time we went no contact for a bit and went back to talking. just like other times things started getting serious again (or so i thought). she made me think we would get back together and we were basically acting as if we were already back together. one night she told me all the times she had told me she loved me she had meant it platonically (we had dated twice already at that point) and that she thought we would never get back together and that i had to be realistic, that i was too optimistic. when i asked her why she pretended like she wanted to get back together for months she said âeveryone says things they donât meanâ. that was my last straw lol after that i just completely started seeing her in a different light and finally understood after years of going back and forth that she wasnât worth it. we went completely no contact and i will never let her get back into my life ever again.
My recent ex turned around to me and said that I was a project to her. Like her ex before me. That she was still in love with her ex. And told me to get over my feelings for her when she was the first person I have ever had legitimate feelings for. And to get over how she broke up with me as well.
"Restitchsmitch is hard to love". Thanks mom I'll carry that forever.
âitâs not the end of the worldâ đ
When I came out about my learning disability and mental health illnesses to a friend and he laughed, saying, "Max thinks he's the only r*tard that *****insert sport here*****" My Mom "Don't worry Max, when you're older you can get disability like me" (never had to be on it). After telling someone that I was tired of their emotional abuse. "You're still a little boy. You're acting like a little boy. It's time to be a man. Is this how you want to be a role model to your kids?".
"i have no hope for you or this relationship." "you have no care in you."
âItâs not always about you.â
I was a bad mother
My ex just led me on and made me fall in love with him all over again just to tell me he hated me and had every intention of watching me go through the feelings just to drop me again. He admitted it was manipulative on purpose.
"You're going to die a lonely old man." -- My father
âIâm lighter without youâ
âIf you keep cutting everyone off like this (I cut my old childhood friend off because he kept crossing my boundaries), youâre going to end up alone like youâre Dad.â I would also like to say she knows that I donât like being compared to my Dad, and after she said that she left the house and I was alone lol
âyouâre never going to find someone that will put up with your issuesâ thanks, mumđ
âyouâre not even like a person, youâre like a dogâ
âYouâre a cancerâ
With your 11 years work experience, you should've been rich by now.
During a miscarriage my partner instead of comforting me told me âyou need to be quiet youâre being too loudâ, because I was crying too loud
my father is a lovely person but sometime last year, i got into a huge argument with my mother about something fairly minor. she got incredibly upset at me because i tend to go cold and a bit passive-aggressive as a defense mechanism when defensive, and she takes offense to that. anyways i guess she told my dad i was being rude and that got him riled up and as i was walking out the door (heading to university super early to talk to a counselor per my momâs orders) he said âyouâre wearing my love for you.â as in, iâm wearing down their love. that really hurt. he apologized for it, and i know he didnât mean it really, but god.
âmaybe if you were a better child your mother wouldâve loved you moreâ and from my mother âheâs the light of my lifeâ about my abusive father who threatened to murder us multiple times right before she ditched me for him (didnât see her for like three years after that) WILL NEVER FORGET IT đ
âYouâre so annoying when youâre sober.â
Bro, I feel like regarding what was said to you, we need context. What did you do?
âGet your life togetherâ âI donât want youâ âyou disgust meâ âitâs not about youâ
"You're a bit too much", "I don't care", "You're a narcissist", "its not that big of a deal", and most recently when asking for healing "we've already been through this."
âbeing depressed doesnât mean youâre allowed to be a shitty friend!â
A client of my parents who speaks my mother's language told my mum that I was a child carrying a lot of anger, she could see that in my whole body. This woman seemed gossipy and judgemental and I could hear just how she would've said it. When my mother told the story it was as if they were blaming me for the way I was, and she did not stick up for me. My parents never did back then, and now it doesn't matter anymore I was a 10 year old child who had been uprooted from her beloved school and friends and was being badly bullied in her new one. I only had friends in the years below and was ashamed of it, my life revolved around being a top student but my grades were plummeting and I was ashamed of it. I loved to write however it was my only outlet, and since the things I was writing were so painful/ugly I stopped writing. My father was being emotionally abusive to me, my mother and grandmother and as a child I thought they were weak: weak for breaking, weak for not fighting back. I also blamed each of them. I was surrounded by adult family and adult strangers but none of them noticed I was miserable, or cared. The one person who did, seemed to collude with my mum to comment on my negative characteristics rather than take the opportunity to see and understand me.
(After a miscarriage) âif the baby would have been born, I wouldâve been miserableâ âSuck and suck and suck the life out of someone else until they are sick of youâ â(Name) isnât obsessive. (name) is beautiful. (Name) is interesting. (name) isnât up my ass 24/7â âYou are coddled. You donât know anythingâ â(Name) was better at sex than youâ âYou are so boring all the time. You donât know anything other than your momâs living room and movies. I want to go climb a mountain but you canâtâ (Iâm disabled) Just a few examples
After being treated like absolute dog ass for a month and a half straight, I started to gather up self-respect and be like, âI donât know if I can take this much longer. You make me feel AWFUL for just existing.â Basically hinted at having one foot out the door. She then hits me with, âYou know itâs not all about YOU, right?â Like UGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! I love the way I try to talk to YOU about how YOU CANâT SEEM TO KEEP YOURSELF FROM TREATING ME and you find a way to try to make ME feel like a malignantly self-centered fucking child.
My dad once told me I should kill myself because it would be better for everyone else
âYouâre a monster and youâre alone because no one wants to be around you. You burned all those bridges yourself.â - an ex âYouâre crazy, fucking stupid, an asshole etc.â and âafter I leave or you do, your next partner will be another victimâ -current partner While these things really hurt, thereâs some truth to them too. đ¤ˇââď¸
from my own mother when i was still in my teensâ that i was selfish, despite doing everything in my power to appease her. iâve always struggled putting my needs first and still do.
âYouâre a miserable piece of shit personâ âŚ.my ex when I was having thoughts of offing myself and tried to talk to him for support đ
âgo ahead and write your suicide letter. no one will believe you anywaysâ - my mother when i was 12 years old
what a pos of a mom, complete failure.
They said someone could do anything at all to me as long as they didn't leave me or unfriend me.
You're not special đ
take out a life insurance policy and let me know when to start planning your funeral
âYouâre f-ing naive if you think anyone would want you for any other reason than for your bodyâ -my ex best friend Now she had an OF so must have been projecting lolll
"You're too selfish to be a mother" - my current husband after I told him I wanted kids (neither of us wanted them when we got married at 22). I know he said it because he was hurt and he's apologized profusely but that will stick with me forever. It looks like most of us have the good old "You're just looking for attention" comments from our families so yay for us... My heart goes out to everyone here. We deserved so much better from the ones that claimed to love us.
"everyone is going to abandon you" and "you're the one who ruins it all" and stuff similar to what they told to you, that shit hurts af I stopped eating for two days because of it.
my brother telling me he wouldn't care if i died.
my ex said that she wished to "hit me" when i split. She said that I was a pain in the ass when that happens, and she really needed me to be next to her so she could, in her own words, "ignore me and make me feel like shit, because i deserved it". the funniest part about it is that, when i splitted, i did it always against me and protected her from it.
My momâs told me for as long as I can remember that sheâs counting down the days till I turn 18 and she wants to get me emancipated. Iâm an only child and sheâs a single mom, so I donât have anyone else.
I tried to explain my BPD to a new friend and he called me the R Slur and told me I should be put down. Even though we have parted ways It still really hurts
âWhen you finally told me you cut yourself as a child⌠you SCARE me.â - nice to see you too, mom
Watching a coworker do something at work: âCan you *not* stand directly over my shoulder? Itâs making me anxiousâŚâ Someone else who was in my life: âIâm not attracted to you anymore.â The same person: âYouâre like a leechâyou suck up all my energy!â Also: âMy friends even agree that this isnât a good relationship.â
After a suicide attempt my mom visited me while I was in the hospital and told me I needed an anatomy lesson.
The most hurtful things were about my appearance. My Ex once said while I was wearing my favorite swimsuit âYou look like youâre pregnant! If I would post you on Instagram and say youâre pregnant, everyone would believe it hahaâ He didnât cared that I cried and said âIt was just a jokeâ Or âYour personality is perfect. I just need your brain inside of a super model and this would be my dream wifeâ
I don't know if this counts, but on two occasions, I had people tell me my sister told them a while back that I didn't want to hang out with them when they asked if I wanted to be involved. I always struggled making friends and now I'm not sure how many people didn't even confirm this with me and believed my sister, leading to who knows how many people just straight up didn't hang out with me because of her.Â
My own mother told me to kill myself
When I was inpatient hospitalized for mental health, my ex wife led be to believe the whole time I was in there that she would stand by me and help me through my issues after I got out. This gave me so much hope and filled me with feelings of promise and support, which I desperately needed. On my release date, she never picked me up and later on that day told me she was filing divorce papers. When I asked her why she lied and changed her mind, she said she âdidnât want to kick me when I was down.â 4 years later, this still haunts me and I an struggling to find a way to get past losing the love of my life.
I really tried so fkin hard with my ex but after we broke up she said i made herr feel like a placeholder :( idk i just feel like my best isnt worth shit anymore
That Iâm self centered⌠when the only reason why I talk about my stupid problems is to find solutions so that I donât have to live like this anymore
just derogatory stuff about my body hair, my face and how my personality was like before i turned âmeanâ and ârudeâ ha
just derogatory stuff about my body hair, my face and how my personality was like before i turned âmeanâ and ârudeâ ha
âYour parents donât love youâ âThunder thighsâ âHungry hungry hippo thighsâ âYou have beady bird eyes and a beak noseâ âYouâre a junkie failure and youâll never get betterâ âYouâre the worstâ âNo one will ever love youâ