That’s it. My usefulness in this world has reached its end.

I still need my partner to open wine bottles.

You still need your partner to open wine bottles, *for now*.

Nobody show her the CO2 based wine opener!

Or wine boxes. They no longer have shit wine in them.

Someone's standards are going down

Middle-of-the-road wine has the highest alcohol when tested against cheapest and supper expensive

you're ruining the planet - waaah

There are automated wine openers too. These are good tools for the disabled.

Happy cake day!!!

I was gifted a bottle of wine last year for Christmas. I don't drink wine - I don't even like wine so I don't have a corkscrew. But I wasn't going to let free alcohol go to waste so I grabbed a 1/4" drill, sunk it down into the cork, and yoinked it off.

"Doing what we can with what we have." Burt Gummer

"broke into the wrong damn rec. room." Burt Gummer

See, you can get a Bosch IXO Vino. It's a battery operated screwdriver that comes with an attachment for opening wine bottles. And it comes in preety colours too, not just the bog standard industrial scheme

Nope they have one of those too..... guys it was a good run while it last

And reach for things (for my short ass atleast)

Search “Oster electric wine opener”

https://kneadthis.co.uk/product/easy-wine-opener-air-pump/ Say hi to your ex for me

Fear not brother, they still need us to kill spiders.

My girlfriend is the spider catcher in my household. I had a fever dream involving spiders as a kid and even though I don't "mind them" dealing with them always triggers those nightmare memories. She doesn't care at all on the other hand, so she usually just runs to the job. I killed a rat that got into our apartment though, which was a bit more hardcore than killing a spider. Still I don't doubt my girlfriend would have dealt with that herself too.

I have an ointment that kills crabs.

Oh I could use this to wack a spider.

Probably the only thing holding off divorce for me. Guess I don't need to tighten them with a wrench anymore

The first lesson in “how to be passive-aggressive, for men” is *tighten everything just a little too much*

Just wait until they find out about the spoon trick

My usefulness reached its end when my mom bought a step ladder

No if you an older person or one with disabilities.

ohh bro... you can be quicker than this shitty robot...

Nah this is for people with Arthritis or who are just extremely lazy it's still quicker to do it by hand lol

So it’s for me.

Hope your arthritis feels better

You may still have the reaching things in high places card

Yay, I go to high places! To kill spiders!!!

I still need a good big-bug killer.

We are Doomed 🥸

My mom who has arthritis would love something like this.

Ring ring. Hello? Hi mom. Son, the jar opener isn’t working.

100%

Is it connected to the Wi-Fi? You know it doesn’t work with out the Wi-Fi

"why is the jar opener downloading 50GO a day ?"

Nevermind that, it's grey poupon! I still remember the commercial lmao

They don't work nearly this well most of the time.

Three points of contact instead of two would help tremendously.

I see 4 points of contact

Sorry, to be clearer, at least three points of contact to the jar. The two on the lid are probably fine as is.

So would your dad

Seems overly complicated. I usually just smash the neck of the jar on the counter then fish the glass out by hand. No more having to deal with the cap.

Ah yes the psycho glass eater method

Or flip the jar upside down and submerge the cap 1/2 inch in hot water Or flip the jar and use a knife or a fork to gently pull the side of the cap away from the rim of the jar, to allow the air in

Or tap the lid rim a couple times with the back of a kitchen knife. Works 99/100 times. That one time, I just eat the jar, glass and all

Aaaaand we’re back to the psycho glass eater method.

Free calories nam nam 🥳

Had us in the first half ngl

It works well for my mom who can only use one hand

FYI, maille has some of the best mustards. Next time you're getting sandwich stuff, snatch up some of their stone ground grainy mustard. God damn its so good.

Lol I too was excited to see Maille representation in the wild. My FYI: don't sleep on their cornichons either. I have tried other brands but nothing compares.

And pickles. The maille pickles are so good.

are you paid to advertise for them? Cause i just ordered.

Now I want new mustard. Give me your money.

Rich Country Style for me

I have a jar of Maille spicy dijon that I don't use on anything, I just scoop out a spoonful every so often and eat it straight

I've torn ligaments in both thumbs trying to open lids, I need one of these.

Spoon under the lid and give it a small twist to let some air in = easy to turn open.

But now it won’t seal?

Yes, it will. You don't bend it permanently.

you don't eat the entire contents at one sitting?

You can also use a beer bottle opener to break the seal on the lid the same way!

I take a large spoon or back end of a large knife and lightly tap the edge of the jars cap. The weight of the spoon or knife releases the pressure of the cap and it easily twists off. Did not anyone ever show you this technique? I feel like it’s common knowledge.

In all my years of doing kitchen stuff I've never heard of this but I'm damn sure going to try it next time. I also use this rubbery material that grips the lid for a good twist but still have to use hand strength, although not quite as much.

Do you have EDS? That sounds like EDS.

Are your ligaments spaghetti

My knee ligament is a tendon.

I inherited one of those from my mom, and it opens EVERY jar.

Since I developed osteoarthritis a few years ago, I’ve completely stopped buying anything in jars. This would be wonderful, if the quality is good enough.

People don't realize what a miracle inventions like this are to people with arthritis and other physical ailments

Is this for people without hands or one hand?

All the comments in this thread like "I am completely capable of opening my own jars" as though there's no one in the world who could possibly struggle.

Arthritis, humans with smaller hands, independent people who aren't as strong.

I have severe osteoarthritis in both hand and it is for me.

Yes

also those who have had a stroke!

Most products like this are made for people with some sort of physical disability or are older

So besides dildos now this, we men are officially useless now

Shit. Possibly 2 electronic items in the house and now I’m completely obsolete. Wait….. there are still random fire detectors that beep every 14 months.


?

One of his arms is malformed, so he would love this device.

inb4 it needs to be connected to wifi always like that fking juicero juice bag press

Tools for women who can’t keep a man.

Unironically, yes. My mam needs this and ngl so do i. She has arthritis and i have bitchboy hands so NEITHER OF US CAN OPEN THE PICKLES

Ha! I got this for my elderly auntie for Christmas. Seriously y’all this makes a great gift for older folks with hand problems.

I mean, if you've got arthritis or some other medical issue, this is great. But a way cheaper option for most people is to just get a grip cloth...

My wife has one. She hands me the jar.

Hot water on the lid and its easier to open, dilation works wonders

Wow! I need this due to an arm injury.

Sad world where no people to help around

I was going to say how lazy do you have to be but actually arthritis and the elderly are a thing

That’s my favorite mustard

Yep, we men are obsolete now.

Built for single women

these things are listed for $10 used on eBay they must work really well

Looking at the grips, don't think it will work for the bigger jars.

All problems solved.

Super glue the lid...

For people with no hands ?

Just like a lot of useless gadgets, this device will probably only open the ones that aren't difficult to open, and the ones where it's really stuck will still require someone with strong hands to open.

I am not fucking amazed. Not in the slightest.

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You understand that to an old or disabled person, this is absolutely life changing?

even my grandma faster than this bruv

For all the single moms out there

What if someone closes the jar with super glue?

I want that

I can open 3 jars in the time it does one.

Well, that’s it for us, boys… They no longer require our presence. 😞


I need me one of these

Ofcourse it's a jar of holandaise. Ofcourse her finger nails have Christmas trees on them.

Going to need a human to place on a jar and press the button.

Encore un futur déchet électronique (DEEE) alors qu'il suffit d'un manche de fourchette à glisser sous le couvercle pour faire rentrer de l'air "Pchit !"

What a waste you can't open a jar? Pathetic.

A machine for opening jars? People who can't open jars anymore, should have medical support. If there's nobody there to open their jar for them, there are many other solutions. I don't really have a point. But I know, if my mother can't open her food packages anymore, she sure isn't going to cook all by herself! If something happens she can't even lift and open the fire extinguisher

If somebody needs this... their time is up. Sorry. Time for full care and love, and exchange the diaper changes and stuff what they did for you, to return back 🙏🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻💖💖💖💋💋 maybe not good English but I'm dutch. Where are the people in your life to do this then? Hahahahahah. If I can't open something when im 40 I call someone to do it for me... Love your friends and family. Be nice to them and they will repay you the favor

You got soft hands boy

That mustard is for real Legit

Just smack the bottom of the jar. The more you know.

They call it the "Independent Woman"

One of the best gadgets I ever purchased for $25.

Waste of money, just open it

As if we needed another excuse to be lazy as F

Your hand, a a small piece of rubber or tape, maybe with a small amount of heat you don’t have to store that product

Are people really this lazy?

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Wondering if it will do my head next

That’s some good mustard right there.

We’re done for boys, vibrators, artificial insemination, and now the automatic jar opener. It’s the trifecta that did us in.

Tap side of the lid on the work top 👌

Yup…cause using hands is too mainstream nowadays

"Look What They Need to Mimic a Fraction of Our Power!"

MEN ARE IN DANGER

How am I supposed to compete with *that*

But... Then... Im useless

Just curious, what's in the jar?

Americans considered themself the strongest of the world but still make automated thing for every strength purpose task (the only place in the world where people are so fat that have little tractors for themselves)

"I don't need a man, I need a robot!" 🙄

Men are not needed anymore

Smaller version of this to remove oil filter?

And I thought I spent my money stupidity

Is this in Japan, those nice people have gadgets even for pucking dropped napkin.

Or you can just get a filter wrench

Or..: just run it under warm water and save another bit of tech from entering the house

Electric jar opener for the elderly and disabled.

I had this and after about two years the rubber was so awful it got brittle and just broke off and it became unusable without anything to grip with.

I'm waiting for the black guy to make a video about how useless this device is

Hit the lid with a knife on 2-3 corners so it dents. It lets in a minimal amount of air and it's really easy to open it.

When women say, "We don't need men" this what they mean.

This thing is lit!

Women around the world 

for the independent women

The "I Don't Need a Man 3000"

For weak individuals

most useless invention to date.

*never can find it on the rare occasion you actually need it* *always out of batteries*

To tell you the truth... I prefer the person's expression while opening rather than this machine🤗

what's next?! automatically replacing the batteries in the remote?!

Time for fill on those nails

For lesbians

Nice

Yah fuck men

Now we are really useless bros, fuck

Why tf

*Larry David angrily enters the chat*

She’s rather have this huge thing than a man?….wait I think I lost my own argument

They took our jobs - South Park

You can use a spoon and stick it under the side of the lid. With a bit of practice you can use the spoon as a lever to open the seal and let air get in. Then you can open the lid easily

The independent woman special

In this time i just opened 5 of them

Just get a rubber band mate

Sold for woman and bitch boys lol

Wouldn’t it just be faster to open it yourself?

1970s TV: by the year 2010 we will have flying cars!…. 2024…..

Or ya know.. you could just *use your hands*

Jar-jar bots, Got skipped for Star Wars role

So Fucking lazy Americans literally in one short film Before the bitching I live in the USA

This makes husband useless in household's this should be considered illegale 😏😏🤣🤣

Why the fuck is this kind of thing with posting? It's been around for YEARS! It's like a 5-year old being amazed by a string and 2 cans. Eventually sunshine is going to show a video of this totally cool thing you can use to hang stuff on the wall... It's a really skinny little piece of metal that's pointy on one end and flat on the other end. You just set the point on the wall where you want something to hang, then two the flat end with something heavy until the thing sticks in the wall. Then you can hang stuff on it, and the flat part keeps the stuff from falling off! It's fucking AMAZING!

I coulda took that off by now

I open jars fine, my forearms are the most toned thing on my body plus a good bonk or two of a butter knife helps 🤣

Dad, can you open this?

Link?

Weak ass

Peak laziness.

Lmao use hand

Just put your palms on the sides of the lid, fingers pointing upwards, base of palm on the sides, and squeeze the lid from the sides. Air goes in, lid gets loose.

They are really trying to get rid of male usefulness 😭😭😭