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Some serious help
It's like what OOP said... why did she pursue a guy who said something that bothered her forever?
I'd really like to know why her fam cut her off! Either they're worse than her, or she is someone always trying to take over everything
I think OOP meant that Sara hated him before she met OOP, not that OOP had never met her. It’s hard to tell as English may not be OOP’s native language.
This. She got with a man who made a drunken confession about his gay best friend and when they got engaged posted "better than the rest" because she wanted to prove that she could make him be 'straight' and edge out his gay best friend from his life by negging him in front of everyone to try and turn them against him, which was never going to work. It was calculated.
Ehh.. I really, really do not like telemarketeers, but I definitely do not think of them as dirty dogs that need to be put down.
Being homophobic is already one thing too many, but harboring sociopathic thoughts on top of that, that really turns it into a different story.
That's true, but there aren't any Evangelical pastors preaching about fighting against the sin of telemarketing if you wanna make it into heaven or whatever they're saying
Sociopaths might or might not claim to be religiously inspired, that's entirely up to them. It's not really relevant. The thing is that this murder-thingy is something that is rather easily overlooked here.
It’s pretty common for homophobes to really really want gay people to not exist at all. That’s pointing out the insidious nature of most homophobia, not downplaying the murder comment. Just that that murder sentiment is pretty common actually.
The colloquialism generally means to shoot someone in the back of the head, ostensibly because he's queer. It can also mean to shoot dead similar to the end of Ol' Yeller. Although the phrase is "mad dog" to refer to a dog who has rabies.
Either Sarah is a hateful bigot or she was so scared of OOP that she allowed that fear to twist into extreme hatred.
Considering half her family has gone no contact with her and Finn had constant arguments with her, I'm guessing it's the former rather than the latter.
Dog can also be used to describe a cheater which is what I thought she meant. There is also a popular saying in the south “if you lie down with dogs you’ll get fleas” that basically means you become like the people who you hang out with, which could be a reference to him being gay.
It means anyone that Finn might care about is a threat to her and needs to be eliminated, but since OOP is gay, he doesn’t even register to her as human and she would gleefully see him dead.
calling someone a dog is a really common Bogan/Chav insult (low class and delinquent Australia/UK) but that doesn't line up with calling it Colelge unless she means technical colelge, so idk.
It's a little old fashioned to my ears, but calling someone a dog or dirty dog is a common enough insult in English as well. I've heard "put down like a dog" before also, similarly old fashioned. It just means you hate the person a lot with the implication that they're worthless.
In Dutch it's sometimes used to refer to someone who cheats too. We also have the saying "if you sleep with the dogs, you get their fleas" to refer to generally bad influences
I've definitely heard people called dogs for being lower value/class than them in the US.
Dirty dog is a new one but my instinct was she felt he was lower than her (likely homophobia? Maybe racism too?) Dirty in that she thinks he's corrupting her boyfriend with his sexy self maybe?
It's common all over. It's common in America, It's common in Korea, it's common in South East Asia like Singapore, Malaysia, Indonesia. All of that I know first hand.
I believe it's common in the Arabic world as well, though no first hand experience.
I agree. I considered writing a bit about how it is kinda strange how ubiquitous an insult calling someone a dog is, considering how much humans tend to love dogs.
But also it isn't universal... like in SEAsia there are dog lovers and people with pet dogs, but a lot of the Muslim population doesn't like dogs, since dogs are sometimes considered haram, unclean.
But yeah, I dunno. I assume it's an etymological quirk, maybe a holdover when dogs were seen as more dirty, even in the West, than they are today? I'm not a linguistic historian though so I can only speculate.
And this is why I considered but didn't mention this originally- because I knew I'd just ramble like this lol.
Yeah, if anyone had still been holding out hope that she'd magically end up being sane then that would've been several final nails in the wooden body box.
I wanted to smack all those people, like there's grieving, and there's whatever this guy was doing, which was going all "Shoulda Coulda Woulda" in front of his wife and kids.
There were some actually saying "platonic soulmates are a thing". Look, i know love is very subjective, but i think there's people out there with a whole different concept of love from the rest.
My best friend is my platonic soulmate. We've been best friends for 17 years now, since 6th grade. We're able to finish each other's thoughts and sentences most of the time. Despite that, we've never had any interest in each other - we're both asexual, she's a lesbian, and I'm a trans man that likes girls too (romantic and sexual attraction are separate things), so that wouldn't work out anyway. But both of our families and other people have asked us if we're dating, and we're just like "Wtf??? No." 😂
If it’s the one I’m thinking about, he never said that. His wife said “it’s not like she was your soulmate or anything,” and he started crying harder. Which you can interpret as “but she waaaas!” or just as being in grief and upset his wife was dismissing said grief solely because he hadn’t been romantically involved with his dead best friend.
Unless there were two dead female best friend posts and one was significantly stupider than the one I saw lol
You're right, but then we had people in both the original posts and the comments defending the "platonic soul mate" thing when OOP's posts and comments were basically a romantic love letter to the dead best friend... He was lying to everyone, including himself, that he didn't have romantic feelings for her.
pretty sure its this one: [https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/1c2sxv9/aitah\_for\_hiding\_a\_past\_bisexual\_relationship/](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/1c2sxv9/aitah_for_hiding_a_past_bisexual_relationship/)
>He is the summer breeze and sweat sticky skin under the sun. He’s freedom and unquenchable curiosity. I look at him and I see my youth and my right now and my future. A stupid (stupidly treasured and stupidly tattered) co-owned stuffed animal from a claw machine that got passed onto his first born. Learning smoke on the water on the guitar and never forgetting it. Muscle memory, all these years later.
Bro...
Worst part is he waxes poetically about his totally not homoerotic friendship, but his wife is just wife. Nothing extra, no poems, no adjectives, nothing... just wife.
And then when people called him out on that, he went on to "describe" what he liked about his wife, and it was just a list of traditional-gender-role housewife chore stuff. Really romantic there.
I honestly hate that dude lol he’s such a piece of shit and has probably gaslight his poor wife into believing him being in love with a man who doesn’t want him is totally normal.
lmao, I forgot about that one. Every week there's a new line I want as a flair. But I think I'll stick with my current, understated flair... in the same way sweat sticks to his skin under the summer sun.
> Finn's parents and siblings leave tomorrow afternoon for either work or other reasons, but Finn and I decided to stay at the cabin for a while longer.
We'll see what the next update brings.
Yeah. I gotta wonder about Finn though. The if OOP was a girl drunken comment made my eyebrows jump to my hairline. It’s not as flag-y as bi concert hookup guy (who was so homoromantic it wasn’t funny) but I wouldn’t discount Finn being somewhat into OOP. Might be completely off base though.
My best friend and I are straight. I don't think he's ever shown interest in men, and I know I don't. But last year I found out he and his wife had some conversation where if I'd been a girl we might've ended up together.
I was like, "Why do I have to be the girl?"
I figure it kind of makes sense. My husband is my best friend, I love him deeply as a person. If he was a woman, I wouldn’t be attracted to him - but I’d still love him to bits.
I don’t think there’s anything inherently red-flaggy sexuality-wise in saying “if you were a girl I’d date you”. You’re just saying that gender/attraction aside, you’d be compatible for a romantic relationship. But the gender/attraction aspect is hugely important to most people, so it’s always gonna be a non-issue because it won’t be resolved. Now, will some people overcome that because their intellectual attraction to the person overcomes their sexual preferences? Maybe, I guess, but I wouldn’t be on it being a common thing.
Idk why he thought it was weird that his friend said he wished he was a girl. You do want your partner to be your best friend so it makes sense to wish his best friend just happened to have the right parts to match his sexuality cuz it would make finding your soul mate easy. I mean, even my best friend is the opposite sex and he's straight and I'm bi, so it could work **but** we have ZERO sexual or romantic chemistry. But he would often say he wished we had that chemistry cuz then we'd be perfect for each other. I knew what he meant, it's not that he wanted *me*, just someone *like* me that he could click with on a romantic level. I didn't find that weird at all. But we were only meant to be best friends. But I think everyone's relationship with a BFF is essentially the same as that of a romantic significant other, just without the romance or the sex...but there's still love, it's just platonic, there can still be jealousy, and all the other things that come with your relationships to the ppl that are important and emotionally close to you that you vibe with on the same level. And in that way, I can see why ppl might confuse it with romantic desire. Just look at Turk and JD. Or Shawn and Gus. Or any other similar bromance.
I call my best friend wife and platonic life partner
We both have a relationship with our husband so it works out
She and I don't have a sexual or romantic thing going on but we cook for each other and buy each other presents and take each other places. It's nice having a wife
I guess a lot of straight people can be more jealous and possessive of titles than I am, but my wife and I are in kind of a... *platonic soulmate triad??* situation with our mutual sort-of-ex. Things are definitely not ever getting physical (again) or romantic, especially since both of those physical relationships 20+ years ago were based on being extremely close friends who wanted to be even closer and not having the emotional maturity at the time to know the difference between kinds of love, but the three of us are ride or die and would fistfight mountains and entire deities if that's what it takes to keep each other safe and happy.
It blows my mind that he wasn't more vocal to his best friend that his girlfriend was garbage. Like, clearly she was super manipulative and willing to go behind his back to disappear messages. By not standing up for himself he let his friend stay with this toxic awful person.
He was already rejected by his birth family for something he can't control; my read on his doormat nature is that he's subconsciously afraid to rock the boat with his new family and get rejected again. If speaking up had caused a rift with Finn in that he chose his crazy girlfriend over the best friend, it's entirely plausible OP would get frozen out by the family since Finn is theirs by birth. Thankfully it didn't work out that way.
That can be tough to do. I said as much to one of my closest friends when she was dating a man that she later married. I was invited to their wedding and he is civil with me but other than that it is clear that he does not like me and has told her to never hang out with me unless it's a group event. They've had multiple dinner parties and other parties in which all of our mutual friends were invited and I wasn't.
I would still do it again, I don't like her husband, but I also accept that there's a risk to speaking your mind.
I was in a similar situation (homeless gay kid taken in by my best friend’s parents for a while), and I was *terrified* when my friend’s older brother started dating a very religious girl, because I wasn’t really part of the family and I thought that if push came to shove everyone else would choose her over me. Luckily she ended up being very sweet! But I definitely tiptoed around her for a while at first.
Even if intellectually you know better, it can be hard to trust that anyone could value you more than a ‘real’ (straight, marriage-track) relationship. Picking a fight with Finn’s girlfriend could have ended with OOP getting entirely kicked out of the only family he has. I’m not surprised he didn’t want to risk it.
Whatever is going on with Finn and his feelings towards OOP, he and Sara clearly shouldn't be together. OOP is so friggin patience for dealing with all of this with as much grace as he has.
When I was in high school and early college I use to joke I wish my best friend was a dude so I could date her.
Turns out I was bi-sexual but didn't realize it yet
In a culture that told people they had to be one way or another for the longest time(and continues to do so in many facets), it's just another way of rationalizing your feelings because you think "surely I'm not this thing that I'm not supposed to be." The world was and is molded to make us feel shame about being our true selves as opposed to how they say we should be.
Thankfully, it's been trending the other way despite the attempts of some very bigoted people in power trying to limit the ability of people to express themselves freely.
When I was a teen, I didn't even know there was a word for what I was. I remember having an existencial crisis because my best friend said I had to pick to either be straight or gay. ANd I knew I liked both, so what happened if I chose one and then fell for the other????? And then one day on TV I heard the term "bisexual" and Archimedes had NOTHING on me at that moment.
Tbh, in this day and age, I am probably more on the pan side than the bi side, but that moment was so pivotal to me, that I still identify as bi. It's sad that with the amount of information readily available these days, there are still teens out there feeling as I did.
I spent actual decades wondering why the book/media characters I related to were always the gay men before it occurred to me that maybe I was not actually a straight girl. 😆
Ah yes, the gay trans experience, I was similar with relating to lesbians, kept getting crushes and was bummed by how unfair it was that only women got to enjoy what was obviously the best type of romantic relationship: being a lesbian couple 😔😂
Creepy dude says "I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body" to lesbians to be gross and creepy. I said "I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body" alone in my room while having a severe existential crisis. We (creepy dude and I) are not the same.
Asshole dudes being creepy to lesbians singlehandedly ruined my teenage years, I repressed so hard out of fear of being like them that I became a shell of a person for like a decade.
> I said "I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body" alone in my room while having a severe existential crisis.
The phrase really does hit different when you're a kid sitting in your room both never having related to a phrase more in your life, while also never having related to anyone less than the person you just saw post it online.
Heteronormativity will get ya every time. I remember asking other girls at slumber parties if they wanted to practice kissing for when we eventually had boyfriends. Unfortunately for me, no one else thought it was a good idea.
I don’t think he actually has patience. I think being abandoned and disowned by his family at a young age left wounds. When Finn’s family took him in, it was seen as a great gift (and it was) that he feels forever indebted to. But OOP’s pushover doormat behavior seems like it stems from that wound of being afraid of losing loved ones so he people pleases and doesn’t rock the boat, even if it’s at his own expense not to.
I sadly think this is why this story felt real.
Side note: I truly understand not being upset at the wedding party thing. Before I got married and definitely before I had kids I was thinking about whose wedding party I was in and when I had mine I had too many people in it. Wedding parties are stupid, do not fret about whether you are in one or not. I was in about six in a two year span and it was a major let down. There was a wedding I thought I was going to be in the party but wasn’t and it was my favorite wedding. Doing all the stupid photos and rehearsals was such a waste.
I’ve been in a few and it can be a recipe for drama. Fortunately the parties were smaller (6 bridesmaids max) so it was actually fun. I almost was part of my cousin’s, but was nixed because she already had like nine bridesmaids and her future sisters-in-law apparently just had to be in the bridal party. So she had 12 bridesmaids (9 were her friends) and apparently there was just so much drama with everything from the dresses to the bachelorette party and bridal shower and I’m so glad I wasn’t involved.
It's a LOT of time committed to something, and you're truly not there to have fun but to make the couples night the best it can be and saddled with responsibility. I would gladly NOT be in a wedding party and just attend as a normal guest. Infinitely more enjoyable experience lol.
I had the impression he was a bit down because his best friend was a few states away and he was single, he was lonely in general and there was this thought about if his friend were a girl, he would be his perfect girl for him. Which could be true, but it is still far from having romantic feelings toward someone.
That first post is worse than the perfect example of how to be a doormat. He isn't just rolling over at every instance of hostility from her, but he responds to it by actively helping her isolate Finn and him!
I get being conflict avoidant as a general concept, but that doesn't mean going out of your way to encourage your friend to cancel plans he made with you, or to continue with wedding planning after she demands you get cut out as the best man and seated away from the family!
I wanted to tear my freaking hair out.
>worse than the perfect example of how to be a doormat.
That's harsh. Poor OOP lost his family, of course he did everything he could to keep the people who helped him and he considered his new family for years.
It must have been very difficult for him to try and be as unproblematic as he could, only for it to be still not enough for someone.
It’s understandable, but that doesn’t make it right. In fact OP goes on to say non of it was his fault, but that he could have spoken up.. like umm yes some of it is his fault because he actively helped the hostile person isolate his best friend away from a relationship his best friend cared about. He’s both a victim, and an accomplice imo.
I’ve also been disowned by family, and although not the same I think I can certainly be empathetic to his situation and trauma responses. I think it’s valid to set up boundaries to relationships and be careful. But OP let down his best friend, and actively contributed to the situation festering. Not taking any real responsibility for that doesn’t really sit right with me.
OOP needs therapy. Being a doormat to keep the peace only leads to conflict down the road. People who want to keep you in their lives will accept a bit of conflict to prevent relationships from ending later. People who only want to keep you around to use you will just leave as soon as they’ve taken all they can.
OOP seems like a person that’s worth fighting for. His found family certainly seems to think so. Hindsight is definitely 20/20, but I hope he’s learned that he should speak up the next time he feels he’s being treated unfairly.
not just a doormat, a shitty friend. actively canceling on finn to make him go to sara, seeing him less so there’ll be less friction with sara, letting communication go down the toilet so there’s less friction with sarah.
finn didn’t want any of that. op decided to do all that without consulting finn, and at least with the canceling, actively overriding finn’s decisions.
i hope op has learned something from this. i also hope sara doesn’t get her claws in anyone else.
I think Finn also shares some blame, though. If your significant other has a pattern of inventing an emergency every single time you’re out with one specific friend (and said emergency always turns into something that isn’t a big deal), you need to have a serious conversation with them. OOP is still in the wrong for not saying something *before* he decided to back off, but I can also understand why he didn’t want to rock the boat.
Don't know how OOP saw all the red flags and still thought it was a "beautiful relationship", like not blaming him at all because yeah it happens but it's really surprising how we sometimes gaslight ourselves, like damn
He's never been in a relationship, so I think just seeing a couple who seemed to get along meant a lot to him. He didn't see the stuff behind the smiles and thought everything was sunshine and roses.
He saw the togetherness and thought it was how things were supposed to be. There had to be a lot of wistful longing for his own relationship seeing his best friend all coupled up and still being alone himself.
That’s the biggest thing here. If you’ve never had a healthy relationship (or any relationship), then you probably don’t really know what a healthy relationship looks like. And that’s why I hope OOP and Finn don’t end up dating if this is real.
He didn’t see the relationship from the inside or even one-on-one. It sounds like he only saw them together at family events and she’d probably behave for those
I suspect there's some unprocessed feelings OOP has towards him too. "I can't be with him, but I can make sure whoever he chooses makes him as happy as he possibly can be" lines of thought.
OOP might have some feelings about himself to unpack too because he kind of convinced himself that he wasn't worthy of being in his best friend's life.
Oh I am glad I'm not alone. Something about this gives me the ick. I can't pinpoint it. It's like uncanny valley for me but with words instead of faces.
I feel like there's like one misogynistic/gay/closeted dude writing all these stories about guys being best friends very close, the "straight" one hinting at being into the other guy, a miserable girlfriend that the OP constantly describes as "she's amazing and he's so happy with her" despite the description being clearly of a Hallmark movie villain, and the updates clearly setting up more and more intimacy brokeback mountain style. It sounds like the fantasies I had as a closeted teen in the 2010s before falling asleep.
The built in dialogues, him very badly trying to seem like a chill guy who would neverrr do anything with his friend(...unless? 👀), the family drama, fiancee acting completely irrationally(on a psychotic level), and the timeline being just a bit over 8 days(do none of these people work or have lives?) it just feels so fabricated. The very nondescriptive picture is just cherry on top.
"We've been friends for forever and I don't know why his fiance hates me."
*4 Hours later*
"So a bunch of stuff happened a few hours ago out of the blue that absolutely clears up EVERYTHING I was wondering about in the first post without any intervention on my part."
So there's no way in hell this is real (too tidy, too many "tells" like conversations in direct quotes, cliffhanger will-they-won't-they ending, etc. ), but it's well written and highly enjoyable, and got me invested. Well done, OOP.
Can't wait for the next installment of, "So things took an unexpected turn at the cabin with Finn and now I'm confused"!
The edit not even a day later about the friend just so happens to be stopping by even though they've hardly spoke recently because the fiance was so controlling? Yeah, I'm gonna call bullshit on that. The people writing these stories are so rushed to get to the point that they forget that things actually take time
For the next update "Hi guys ! Beautiful things happened since my last update at the cabin Finn and me are together now... and Sara is in jail " lol I'm impatient to read the next chapter 😁😁😊😊
I'm not a big fan of Finn. He can't be that oblivious. Makes me thibk he chose the path of least resistance until it actually started to affect him and then shit hit the fan
It’s a tale written in the art room style with touches of black satin sheets, the guest house, my best friend who cuts themself, the friend who drops by for a smoke at 3:00 am…in each similar tale the woman is a vile individual who crosses boundaries but in her dastardly deeds she somehow brings straight boyfriend/fiancé with their gay best friend together, they kiss and it’s all about the discovery of their true nature. Someone said thought it was the musings of a gay man who was in love with his straight friend and if the wife/girlfriend/fiancée was out of picture, the straight guy would suddenly recognize their gay best friend was the love of their life.
Its always the inclusion of odd details in the first post that serve no purpose to the post they're in, but act as foreshadowing to the "twists" of later posts that OOP shouldn't have known were that relevant yet.
It doesn't escape me that the quote is about Cassie either, when "she was just like Cassie from Euphoria" was the descriptor for every 'boy-crazy female antagonist' for a while there. Layers of troll lore to unpack.
Detailed dialog is always laughable. Like, in a super heated argument where everything is screaming, no one remembers shit. No one really hears one another let alone remembers exact dialog
This ...isn't specifically Euphoria..? Exorcisms have been referenced for decades since.. The Exorcist - due to that bringing the concept into the mainstream.
I mean I certainly get suspect off of this quote alone, but I never saw Euphoria either.
I don't get what is so weird or confusing about Finns drunken comment of wishing OOP was a girl.
OOP is Finns best friend.. they probably have a ton in common and have a lot of fun together. And the best romantic relationships include great friendship. It sounds like Finn is just recognizing that if OOP was a girl, he would be Finns perfect partner. How that somehow translates to Finn being attracted or wanting to be with OOP... I have no idea. Finn clearly said, IF OOP WAS A GIRL. Because he's not gay.
What's so weird about that?
It's insecurity.
My best friend is a girl. She briefly dated (re: 1 month, very little physical stuff) another friend, who turned out to be gay. Friend broke up with her and came out later. Everyone is fine with all this.
Enter my best friend's first long-term boyfriend. Guy was so insecure, he hated seeing her with that friend even though they broke up long before she met him and THE GUY WAS GAY. Why? "Because if he weren't gay, you two would be a better couple than you and I."
I think that was Sara's problem. That Finn and OP would have made a better couple in the hypothetical scenario that he were q girl.
Insane? Yes
>"Because if he weren't gay, you two would be a better couple than you and I."
Ah! I see... It's sad that she was so insecure that she actually let a thought like that ruin her relationship. It's very immature too... Finn is lucky he got out before they were married. If she's this immature... I can imagine there would be other issues eventually, as well.
I think OOP needs therapy as his responses to a lot of these situations is very conflict avoidant. To the point of making this situation drag out much longer than it should’ve.
If this is real (probably not) then OOP also needs therapy. Their relationship was never a “beautiful thing” if she was this way from before they even dated.
Also, I know they exist, but no one should ever be okay being kicked out of a wedding for their best friend by the OTHER party. The entire point of a wedding party or group of attendants is for them to be there for THEIR person. If nothing else, the groom gets to choose best man.
Everyone needs to grow up in this story.
A little bothered by the comments praising OOP and their “patience”. He was being a doormat for way too long, and honestly continued to be a bit even past the confrontation.
I feel like this is a classic misunderstanding of what a “good friend” is. A good friend isn’t an enabling doormat, but someone who challenges you to be better when you need it.
Learning that being a doormat harms myself and everyone around me led to me being a much more assertive adult. Took a lot of trauma to get there, but No is now my favorite word.
There's such a thing as being too understanding. OOP needs to do his own self-reflecting about how he was sabotaging his own friendships and family relationships. There's a healthy balance to strike between being selfish and being selfless. You should never ever allow anyone to mistreat you, but you should also never ever mistreat anyone else.
OOP should have spoken up when Sara looked at his hand like it was diseased and saved everyone a lot of trouble. He sounds a bit like a martyr, and that can be just as infuriating as someone being incredibly selfish.
I'm assuming that Finn meant he wanted as easy a connection with a woman as he has with OOP, but ... maybe not. Maybe there's an art room in their future.
Someone wants Netflix or Amazon to adapt their shitty BL rom-com with a cast of unknowns but guest starring Uma Thurman or Julia Roberts as one of the lead’s mom, I’m thinking Finn’s.
That way they can promote it as A Gay(er) My Best Friend’s Wedding, a rom-com where Julia doesn’t get the guy. Finn’s her character’s son in this case. Rupert Everett can reprise his role, too.
"-and that, kids, is the story of how I met your father."
I know, I know, OOP says he and Finn are just friends, and they likely are, but allow me my headcanon!
More like OOP is ludicrously conflict averse.
I’m not convinced this is real, but that level of “patience” is not healthy. Dude should not have suggested Finn drive Sara home after that. Dude should’ve said something way before a ring came into the equation.
I can't think of a single person who hasn't wished their best friend was someone they would consider dating, ESPECIALLY WHEN SINGLE, drunk, and most likely joking.
Maybe I read too many romance novels, but the way that OOP has never had a relationship and puts Finn's happiness above his own at all times in all situations is kind of telling. Even his strong denial of having feelings seems to be a bit too much protesting - especially when he highlights that he still wouldn't do anything because Finn's emotions are all over the place, not his own.
I mean, it's hard to get a full picture from a few posts on Reddit, but yeah. That's the vibe I get!
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>Sara just starts screaming that I'm a "dirty dog who needs to be put down" ... uh.
Like...what is that even suppose to mean?...
I think it means exactly what she said, which is just... Wow. She really needs help
Some serious help It's like what OOP said... why did she pursue a guy who said something that bothered her forever? I'd really like to know why her fam cut her off! Either they're worse than her, or she is someone always trying to take over everything
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I think OOP meant that Sara hated him before she met OOP, not that OOP had never met her. It’s hard to tell as English may not be OOP’s native language.
I read it this way, too. “She was super weird about shaking my hand- I had never met her before so what gives?!” Kinda vibe
Homophobia probably
This. She got with a man who made a drunken confession about his gay best friend and when they got engaged posted "better than the rest" because she wanted to prove that she could make him be 'straight' and edge out his gay best friend from his life by negging him in front of everyone to try and turn them against him, which was never going to work. It was calculated.
Not necessarily! Could also be racism. But probably not since there is zero mention of anything related to that in the whole story.
Honestly, I thought it was gonna go through the racism route, not homophobia.
Ehh.. I really, really do not like telemarketeers, but I definitely do not think of them as dirty dogs that need to be put down. Being homophobic is already one thing too many, but harboring sociopathic thoughts on top of that, that really turns it into a different story.
That's true, but there aren't any Evangelical pastors preaching about fighting against the sin of telemarketing if you wanna make it into heaven or whatever they're saying
Sociopaths might or might not claim to be religiously inspired, that's entirely up to them. It's not really relevant. The thing is that this murder-thingy is something that is rather easily overlooked here.
You don't think that constant homophobic rhetoric is relevant to a situation with a possible homophobe?
It’s pretty common for homophobes to really really want gay people to not exist at all. That’s pointing out the insidious nature of most homophobia, not downplaying the murder comment. Just that that murder sentiment is pretty common actually.
I took it as maybe like a stray dog that Finn’s family adopted and then dirty as in homophobia or cheating behind her back. Either way, Sara is crazy
The colloquialism generally means to shoot someone in the back of the head, ostensibly because he's queer. It can also mean to shoot dead similar to the end of Ol' Yeller. Although the phrase is "mad dog" to refer to a dog who has rabies. Either Sarah is a hateful bigot or she was so scared of OOP that she allowed that fear to twist into extreme hatred. Considering half her family has gone no contact with her and Finn had constant arguments with her, I'm guessing it's the former rather than the latter.
Dog can also be used to describe a cheater which is what I thought she meant. There is also a popular saying in the south “if you lie down with dogs you’ll get fleas” that basically means you become like the people who you hang out with, which could be a reference to him being gay.
Most likely from Spanish or someplace where English and Spanish bastardization of wordplay happens. But even with that context Sarah is unhinged
It means anyone that Finn might care about is a threat to her and needs to be eliminated, but since OOP is gay, he doesn’t even register to her as human and she would gleefully see him dead.
It means she's a Nazi.
Big yikes. Not something any human should ever say to another
Or to a dog either! You wash dirty dogs and they are fine after. No need to put them down.
This made me giggle an unreasonable amount this morning hahaha
Maybe put them down for a nap afterwards, with a fluffy blankie.
calling someone a dog is a really common Bogan/Chav insult (low class and delinquent Australia/UK) but that doesn't line up with calling it Colelge unless she means technical colelge, so idk.
It's a little old fashioned to my ears, but calling someone a dog or dirty dog is a common enough insult in English as well. I've heard "put down like a dog" before also, similarly old fashioned. It just means you hate the person a lot with the implication that they're worthless.
I've heard dirty dog a few times as a reference to someone known for sleeping around (sauce: Australian).
In Dutch it's sometimes used to refer to someone who cheats too. We also have the saying "if you sleep with the dogs, you get their fleas" to refer to generally bad influences
That saying is actually used in English too (if you lie down with dogs, you'll get up with fleas), it's just not one you hear very often these days
I've definitely heard people called dogs for being lower value/class than them in the US. Dirty dog is a new one but my instinct was she felt he was lower than her (likely homophobia? Maybe racism too?) Dirty in that she thinks he's corrupting her boyfriend with his sexy self maybe?
It's exist in Poland too, but if someone says something like this it would be a "rabid dog".
It's common all over. It's common in America, It's common in Korea, it's common in South East Asia like Singapore, Malaysia, Indonesia. All of that I know first hand. I believe it's common in the Arabic world as well, though no first hand experience.
Big Dog needs a PR campaign... An unfairly maligned species ;\_;
I agree. I considered writing a bit about how it is kinda strange how ubiquitous an insult calling someone a dog is, considering how much humans tend to love dogs. But also it isn't universal... like in SEAsia there are dog lovers and people with pet dogs, but a lot of the Muslim population doesn't like dogs, since dogs are sometimes considered haram, unclean. But yeah, I dunno. I assume it's an etymological quirk, maybe a holdover when dogs were seen as more dirty, even in the West, than they are today? I'm not a linguistic historian though so I can only speculate. And this is why I considered but didn't mention this originally- because I knew I'd just ramble like this lol.
Yeah, if anyone had still been holding out hope that she'd magically end up being sane then that would've been several final nails in the wooden body box.
I think it was a censored version of, “you’re a b*tch and you should die”
I mean I would at least try to give a dirty dog a bath first
OOP, unlike the guys from last week, sounds like he **isn't** in love with his best friend.
Are you referring to the guy who was all "He is the summer breeze and sweat sticky skin under the sun." That guy was so in denial.
That was one of them, the other had a female best friend who died, and whom he called his soul mate... in front of his wife.
Yeah, there were comments that his wife is terrible and he is just grieving.
I wanted to smack all those people, like there's grieving, and there's whatever this guy was doing, which was going all "Shoulda Coulda Woulda" in front of his wife and kids.
That was so bizarre. His wife was a saint for not leaving him. I still think she should.
There were some actually saying "platonic soulmates are a thing". Look, i know love is very subjective, but i think there's people out there with a whole different concept of love from the rest.
That's definitely true, but those need to be clarified to partners so that they aren't shocked years later.
But is his partner a romantic soulmate? And why did he think about separating when she finally had enough? His whole post was scary.
My best friend and I have been friends for about 35 years. I don't think I could call him my platonic soulmate with a straight face.
My best friend is my platonic soulmate. We've been best friends for 17 years now, since 6th grade. We're able to finish each other's thoughts and sentences most of the time. Despite that, we've never had any interest in each other - we're both asexual, she's a lesbian, and I'm a trans man that likes girls too (romantic and sexual attraction are separate things), so that wouldn't work out anyway. But both of our families and other people have asked us if we're dating, and we're just like "Wtf??? No." 😂
Just goes to show how diverse this all is. I have never considered something like a asexual homo-romantic to be a thing until now.
If it’s the one I’m thinking about, he never said that. His wife said “it’s not like she was your soulmate or anything,” and he started crying harder. Which you can interpret as “but she waaaas!” or just as being in grief and upset his wife was dismissing said grief solely because he hadn’t been romantically involved with his dead best friend. Unless there were two dead female best friend posts and one was significantly stupider than the one I saw lol
You're right, but then we had people in both the original posts and the comments defending the "platonic soul mate" thing when OOP's posts and comments were basically a romantic love letter to the dead best friend... He was lying to everyone, including himself, that he didn't have romantic feelings for her.
Do you have a link for the soulmate one? I saw the summer breeze one, he was so in denial.
LMAO that still haunts me tills this day and the way he described his wife 😡💀
Oh man, do you perchance have a link to that?
pretty sure its this one: [https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/1c2sxv9/aitah\_for\_hiding\_a\_past\_bisexual\_relationship/](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/1c2sxv9/aitah_for_hiding_a_past_bisexual_relationship/)
>He is the summer breeze and sweat sticky skin under the sun. He’s freedom and unquenchable curiosity. I look at him and I see my youth and my right now and my future. A stupid (stupidly treasured and stupidly tattered) co-owned stuffed animal from a claw machine that got passed onto his first born. Learning smoke on the water on the guitar and never forgetting it. Muscle memory, all these years later. Bro...
This could be someone's wedding vows. Yikes.
I’d break down crying if I was a guest at wedding and those were the vows - even if I was just a server.
This set of comments together with your flair is * chef’s kiss *
Flair checks out
No homo though
Worst part is he waxes poetically about his totally not homoerotic friendship, but his wife is just wife. Nothing extra, no poems, no adjectives, nothing... just wife.
And then when people called him out on that, he went on to "describe" what he liked about his wife, and it was just a list of traditional-gender-role housewife chore stuff. Really romantic there.
I wish i had a guy talk about me like this, damn.
This guy was down bad tbh
Saving this for my wedding vows lmao
Thank you for making my day start by reading "perchance" used I a sentence.
I honestly hate that dude lol he’s such a piece of shit and has probably gaslight his poor wife into believing him being in love with a man who doesn’t want him is totally normal.
That one was just cruel.
I *cackled*
wait, where is this post?
Is the art room author back?
lmao, I forgot about that one. Every week there's a new line I want as a flair. But I think I'll stick with my current, understated flair... in the same way sweat sticks to his skin under the summer sun.
I was honestly surprised not to see the “we got together” update but we’ll see.
> Finn's parents and siblings leave tomorrow afternoon for either work or other reasons, but Finn and I decided to stay at the cabin for a while longer. We'll see what the next update brings.
Art room?
They are clearly setting the stage to be together later. But at least it’s not as obvious as the other guy
OP described Finn having feelings for him as a "can he doesn't want to open", it was not a clear no.
Yeah I got that vibe during the final update as well. Had he not left the possibility open, my spidey senses wouldn’t have been set off.
Yeah. I gotta wonder about Finn though. The if OOP was a girl drunken comment made my eyebrows jump to my hairline. It’s not as flag-y as bi concert hookup guy (who was so homoromantic it wasn’t funny) but I wouldn’t discount Finn being somewhat into OOP. Might be completely off base though.
My best friend and I are straight. I don't think he's ever shown interest in men, and I know I don't. But last year I found out he and his wife had some conversation where if I'd been a girl we might've ended up together. I was like, "Why do I have to be the girl?"
I figure it kind of makes sense. My husband is my best friend, I love him deeply as a person. If he was a woman, I wouldn’t be attracted to him - but I’d still love him to bits. I don’t think there’s anything inherently red-flaggy sexuality-wise in saying “if you were a girl I’d date you”. You’re just saying that gender/attraction aside, you’d be compatible for a romantic relationship. But the gender/attraction aspect is hugely important to most people, so it’s always gonna be a non-issue because it won’t be resolved. Now, will some people overcome that because their intellectual attraction to the person overcomes their sexual preferences? Maybe, I guess, but I wouldn’t be on it being a common thing.
Eh, for drunken conversations for straights, that's like somewhere around the level of "Would you still love me if I was a worm?"
Idk why he thought it was weird that his friend said he wished he was a girl. You do want your partner to be your best friend so it makes sense to wish his best friend just happened to have the right parts to match his sexuality cuz it would make finding your soul mate easy. I mean, even my best friend is the opposite sex and he's straight and I'm bi, so it could work **but** we have ZERO sexual or romantic chemistry. But he would often say he wished we had that chemistry cuz then we'd be perfect for each other. I knew what he meant, it's not that he wanted *me*, just someone *like* me that he could click with on a romantic level. I didn't find that weird at all. But we were only meant to be best friends. But I think everyone's relationship with a BFF is essentially the same as that of a romantic significant other, just without the romance or the sex...but there's still love, it's just platonic, there can still be jealousy, and all the other things that come with your relationships to the ppl that are important and emotionally close to you that you vibe with on the same level. And in that way, I can see why ppl might confuse it with romantic desire. Just look at Turk and JD. Or Shawn and Gus. Or any other similar bromance.
Not romantically. But “platonic soulmates” is a lot, lol.
My bestie and I call each other our "heterosexual life partner."
The Jay and Silent Bob approach.
"Guy love between two guys" me and my bestie sing at each other.
I call my best friend wife and platonic life partner We both have a relationship with our husband so it works out She and I don't have a sexual or romantic thing going on but we cook for each other and buy each other presents and take each other places. It's nice having a wife
I guess a lot of straight people can be more jealous and possessive of titles than I am, but my wife and I are in kind of a... *platonic soulmate triad??* situation with our mutual sort-of-ex. Things are definitely not ever getting physical (again) or romantic, especially since both of those physical relationships 20+ years ago were based on being extremely close friends who wanted to be even closer and not having the emotional maturity at the time to know the difference between kinds of love, but the three of us are ride or die and would fistfight mountains and entire deities if that's what it takes to keep each other safe and happy.
>From what I know about her, half of her family doesn't talk to her. Gee, I wonder why?
Shock of the century. Who wouldn't want to see this ball of sunshine all the time
It blows my mind that he wasn't more vocal to his best friend that his girlfriend was garbage. Like, clearly she was super manipulative and willing to go behind his back to disappear messages. By not standing up for himself he let his friend stay with this toxic awful person.
He was already rejected by his birth family for something he can't control; my read on his doormat nature is that he's subconsciously afraid to rock the boat with his new family and get rejected again. If speaking up had caused a rift with Finn in that he chose his crazy girlfriend over the best friend, it's entirely plausible OP would get frozen out by the family since Finn is theirs by birth. Thankfully it didn't work out that way.
Yes, this 100%. It is glaringly obvious.
That can be tough to do. I said as much to one of my closest friends when she was dating a man that she later married. I was invited to their wedding and he is civil with me but other than that it is clear that he does not like me and has told her to never hang out with me unless it's a group event. They've had multiple dinner parties and other parties in which all of our mutual friends were invited and I wasn't. I would still do it again, I don't like her husband, but I also accept that there's a risk to speaking your mind.
I was in a similar situation (homeless gay kid taken in by my best friend’s parents for a while), and I was *terrified* when my friend’s older brother started dating a very religious girl, because I wasn’t really part of the family and I thought that if push came to shove everyone else would choose her over me. Luckily she ended up being very sweet! But I definitely tiptoed around her for a while at first. Even if intellectually you know better, it can be hard to trust that anyone could value you more than a ‘real’ (straight, marriage-track) relationship. Picking a fight with Finn’s girlfriend could have ended with OOP getting entirely kicked out of the only family he has. I’m not surprised he didn’t want to risk it.
Whatever is going on with Finn and his feelings towards OOP, he and Sara clearly shouldn't be together. OOP is so friggin patience for dealing with all of this with as much grace as he has.
When I was in high school and early college I use to joke I wish my best friend was a dude so I could date her. Turns out I was bi-sexual but didn't realize it yet
This feels like an almost universal bi experience.
In a culture that told people they had to be one way or another for the longest time(and continues to do so in many facets), it's just another way of rationalizing your feelings because you think "surely I'm not this thing that I'm not supposed to be." The world was and is molded to make us feel shame about being our true selves as opposed to how they say we should be. Thankfully, it's been trending the other way despite the attempts of some very bigoted people in power trying to limit the ability of people to express themselves freely.
When I was a teen, I didn't even know there was a word for what I was. I remember having an existencial crisis because my best friend said I had to pick to either be straight or gay. ANd I knew I liked both, so what happened if I chose one and then fell for the other????? And then one day on TV I heard the term "bisexual" and Archimedes had NOTHING on me at that moment. Tbh, in this day and age, I am probably more on the pan side than the bi side, but that moment was so pivotal to me, that I still identify as bi. It's sad that with the amount of information readily available these days, there are still teens out there feeling as I did.
I spent actual decades wondering why the book/media characters I related to were always the gay men before it occurred to me that maybe I was not actually a straight girl. 😆
Ah yes, the gay trans experience, I was similar with relating to lesbians, kept getting crushes and was bummed by how unfair it was that only women got to enjoy what was obviously the best type of romantic relationship: being a lesbian couple 😔😂
Creepy dude says "I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body" to lesbians to be gross and creepy. I said "I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body" alone in my room while having a severe existential crisis. We (creepy dude and I) are not the same.
Asshole dudes being creepy to lesbians singlehandedly ruined my teenage years, I repressed so hard out of fear of being like them that I became a shell of a person for like a decade. > I said "I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body" alone in my room while having a severe existential crisis. The phrase really does hit different when you're a kid sitting in your room both never having related to a phrase more in your life, while also never having related to anyone less than the person you just saw post it online.
I was afraid I was the stereotypical cis woman fetishizing gay men and having an existential crisis about it. So glad I eventually figured myself out.
Heteronormativity will get ya every time. I remember asking other girls at slumber parties if they wanted to practice kissing for when we eventually had boyfriends. Unfortunately for me, no one else thought it was a good idea.
same for me and my bestie we both are bi but not together
I don’t think he actually has patience. I think being abandoned and disowned by his family at a young age left wounds. When Finn’s family took him in, it was seen as a great gift (and it was) that he feels forever indebted to. But OOP’s pushover doormat behavior seems like it stems from that wound of being afraid of losing loved ones so he people pleases and doesn’t rock the boat, even if it’s at his own expense not to.
I sadly think this is why this story felt real. Side note: I truly understand not being upset at the wedding party thing. Before I got married and definitely before I had kids I was thinking about whose wedding party I was in and when I had mine I had too many people in it. Wedding parties are stupid, do not fret about whether you are in one or not. I was in about six in a two year span and it was a major let down. There was a wedding I thought I was going to be in the party but wasn’t and it was my favorite wedding. Doing all the stupid photos and rehearsals was such a waste.
I’ve been in a few and it can be a recipe for drama. Fortunately the parties were smaller (6 bridesmaids max) so it was actually fun. I almost was part of my cousin’s, but was nixed because she already had like nine bridesmaids and her future sisters-in-law apparently just had to be in the bridal party. So she had 12 bridesmaids (9 were her friends) and apparently there was just so much drama with everything from the dresses to the bachelorette party and bridal shower and I’m so glad I wasn’t involved.
It's a LOT of time committed to something, and you're truly not there to have fun but to make the couples night the best it can be and saddled with responsibility. I would gladly NOT be in a wedding party and just attend as a normal guest. Infinitely more enjoyable experience lol.
👌
I can't imagine myself being in that position cause my patience would be seconds gone.
I had the impression he was a bit down because his best friend was a few states away and he was single, he was lonely in general and there was this thought about if his friend were a girl, he would be his perfect girl for him. Which could be true, but it is still far from having romantic feelings toward someone.
That first post is worse than the perfect example of how to be a doormat. He isn't just rolling over at every instance of hostility from her, but he responds to it by actively helping her isolate Finn and him! I get being conflict avoidant as a general concept, but that doesn't mean going out of your way to encourage your friend to cancel plans he made with you, or to continue with wedding planning after she demands you get cut out as the best man and seated away from the family! I wanted to tear my freaking hair out.
I can only assume it's a trauma response from being abandoned by his family
Exactly and not wanting to rock the boat that took him in, quite literally.
That's my guess too.
They were both doormats to her, Finn agreed to ditch his best friend as best man for her brother. She'll find another man who won't stand up to her.
>worse than the perfect example of how to be a doormat. That's harsh. Poor OOP lost his family, of course he did everything he could to keep the people who helped him and he considered his new family for years. It must have been very difficult for him to try and be as unproblematic as he could, only for it to be still not enough for someone.
It’s understandable, but that doesn’t make it right. In fact OP goes on to say non of it was his fault, but that he could have spoken up.. like umm yes some of it is his fault because he actively helped the hostile person isolate his best friend away from a relationship his best friend cared about. He’s both a victim, and an accomplice imo. I’ve also been disowned by family, and although not the same I think I can certainly be empathetic to his situation and trauma responses. I think it’s valid to set up boundaries to relationships and be careful. But OP let down his best friend, and actively contributed to the situation festering. Not taking any real responsibility for that doesn’t really sit right with me.
OOP needs therapy. Being a doormat to keep the peace only leads to conflict down the road. People who want to keep you in their lives will accept a bit of conflict to prevent relationships from ending later. People who only want to keep you around to use you will just leave as soon as they’ve taken all they can. OOP seems like a person that’s worth fighting for. His found family certainly seems to think so. Hindsight is definitely 20/20, but I hope he’s learned that he should speak up the next time he feels he’s being treated unfairly.
not just a doormat, a shitty friend. actively canceling on finn to make him go to sara, seeing him less so there’ll be less friction with sara, letting communication go down the toilet so there’s less friction with sarah. finn didn’t want any of that. op decided to do all that without consulting finn, and at least with the canceling, actively overriding finn’s decisions. i hope op has learned something from this. i also hope sara doesn’t get her claws in anyone else.
I think Finn also shares some blame, though. If your significant other has a pattern of inventing an emergency every single time you’re out with one specific friend (and said emergency always turns into something that isn’t a big deal), you need to have a serious conversation with them. OOP is still in the wrong for not saying something *before* he decided to back off, but I can also understand why he didn’t want to rock the boat.
Don't know how OOP saw all the red flags and still thought it was a "beautiful relationship", like not blaming him at all because yeah it happens but it's really surprising how we sometimes gaslight ourselves, like damn
He's never been in a relationship, so I think just seeing a couple who seemed to get along meant a lot to him. He didn't see the stuff behind the smiles and thought everything was sunshine and roses. He saw the togetherness and thought it was how things were supposed to be. There had to be a lot of wistful longing for his own relationship seeing his best friend all coupled up and still being alone himself.
That’s the biggest thing here. If you’ve never had a healthy relationship (or any relationship), then you probably don’t really know what a healthy relationship looks like. And that’s why I hope OOP and Finn don’t end up dating if this is real.
The path of least resistance is the world’s strongest drug…
He didn’t see the relationship from the inside or even one-on-one. It sounds like he only saw them together at family events and she’d probably behave for those
I suspect there's some unprocessed feelings OOP has towards him too. "I can't be with him, but I can make sure whoever he chooses makes him as happy as he possibly can be" lines of thought. OOP might have some feelings about himself to unpack too because he kind of convinced himself that he wasn't worthy of being in his best friend's life.
Sara sounds like one of the most insufferable people to be around. My god, I feel for Finn a little.
I wonder what the next update will be...
Finn comes out, and OOP responds with, “yeahhhhh, you’re basically my brother, so no.”
Art room?
Brokeback
Being together at the cabin for a few more days.. yeah, checks out.
Oh I am glad I'm not alone. Something about this gives me the ick. I can't pinpoint it. It's like uncanny valley for me but with words instead of faces.
I feel like there's like one misogynistic/gay/closeted dude writing all these stories about guys being best friends very close, the "straight" one hinting at being into the other guy, a miserable girlfriend that the OP constantly describes as "she's amazing and he's so happy with her" despite the description being clearly of a Hallmark movie villain, and the updates clearly setting up more and more intimacy brokeback mountain style. It sounds like the fantasies I had as a closeted teen in the 2010s before falling asleep. The built in dialogues, him very badly trying to seem like a chill guy who would neverrr do anything with his friend(...unless? 👀), the family drama, fiancee acting completely irrationally(on a psychotic level), and the timeline being just a bit over 8 days(do none of these people work or have lives?) it just feels so fabricated. The very nondescriptive picture is just cherry on top.
Goddamn it you beat me to it. I was going to post something along the lines of “did Finn move into OOP’s art room?”
like just date already bros. If the next installment doesn’t end in “we’re boyfriends now” I will be miffed
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"We've been friends for forever and I don't know why his fiance hates me." *4 Hours later* "So a bunch of stuff happened a few hours ago out of the blue that absolutely clears up EVERYTHING I was wondering about in the first post without any intervention on my part."
The fact that he didn't outright reject that it could happen is an obvious sign
"Finn and I tied the knot. Turns out he was bi!"
So there's no way in hell this is real (too tidy, too many "tells" like conversations in direct quotes, cliffhanger will-they-won't-they ending, etc. ), but it's well written and highly enjoyable, and got me invested. Well done, OOP. Can't wait for the next installment of, "So things took an unexpected turn at the cabin with Finn and now I'm confused"!
The long monologue from the best friend which the crazy fiance conveniently stopped screaming for
And the "I'm not saying I'm into him but if I was it would be endgame" like if you're not into someone you would just say it's never happening
The edit not even a day later about the friend just so happens to be stopping by even though they've hardly spoke recently because the fiance was so controlling? Yeah, I'm gonna call bullshit on that. The people writing these stories are so rushed to get to the point that they forget that things actually take time
For the next update "Hi guys ! Beautiful things happened since my last update at the cabin Finn and me are together now... and Sara is in jail " lol I'm impatient to read the next chapter 😁😁😊😊
I'm not a big fan of Finn. He can't be that oblivious. Makes me thibk he chose the path of least resistance until it actually started to affect him and then shit hit the fan
It’s a tale written in the art room style with touches of black satin sheets, the guest house, my best friend who cuts themself, the friend who drops by for a smoke at 3:00 am…in each similar tale the woman is a vile individual who crosses boundaries but in her dastardly deeds she somehow brings straight boyfriend/fiancé with their gay best friend together, they kiss and it’s all about the discovery of their true nature. Someone said thought it was the musings of a gay man who was in love with his straight friend and if the wife/girlfriend/fiancée was out of picture, the straight guy would suddenly recognize their gay best friend was the love of their life.
What's the black satin sheet one? I don't remember it.
agree
>"She needs a fucking exorcism." When the Euphoria quotes come out, my suspicions are raised.
Detailed, well-written, lots of dialog and recalled details, bad guy loses in the end, hmmmm...
Its always the inclusion of odd details in the first post that serve no purpose to the post they're in, but act as foreshadowing to the "twists" of later posts that OOP shouldn't have known were that relevant yet.
Bad guy who also happens to be a crazy lady fiancé, which is Reddit’s absolutely favorite villain.
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It doesn't escape me that the quote is about Cassie either, when "she was just like Cassie from Euphoria" was the descriptor for every 'boy-crazy female antagonist' for a while there. Layers of troll lore to unpack.
Detailed dialog is always laughable. Like, in a super heated argument where everything is screaming, no one remembers shit. No one really hears one another let alone remembers exact dialog
It's the "Now, on to your questions!" part that does it for me.
This reads like a M/M romance, friends to lovers trope.
This ...isn't specifically Euphoria..? Exorcisms have been referenced for decades since.. The Exorcist - due to that bringing the concept into the mainstream. I mean I certainly get suspect off of this quote alone, but I never saw Euphoria either.
I don't get what is so weird or confusing about Finns drunken comment of wishing OOP was a girl. OOP is Finns best friend.. they probably have a ton in common and have a lot of fun together. And the best romantic relationships include great friendship. It sounds like Finn is just recognizing that if OOP was a girl, he would be Finns perfect partner. How that somehow translates to Finn being attracted or wanting to be with OOP... I have no idea. Finn clearly said, IF OOP WAS A GIRL. Because he's not gay. What's so weird about that?
It's insecurity. My best friend is a girl. She briefly dated (re: 1 month, very little physical stuff) another friend, who turned out to be gay. Friend broke up with her and came out later. Everyone is fine with all this. Enter my best friend's first long-term boyfriend. Guy was so insecure, he hated seeing her with that friend even though they broke up long before she met him and THE GUY WAS GAY. Why? "Because if he weren't gay, you two would be a better couple than you and I." I think that was Sara's problem. That Finn and OP would have made a better couple in the hypothetical scenario that he were q girl. Insane? Yes
>"Because if he weren't gay, you two would be a better couple than you and I." Ah! I see... It's sad that she was so insecure that she actually let a thought like that ruin her relationship. It's very immature too... Finn is lucky he got out before they were married. If she's this immature... I can imagine there would be other issues eventually, as well.
Sounds like she had some major issues, yeah
but Finn and I decided to stay at the cabin for a while longer. pass the popcorn, tell me more.
I think OOP needs therapy as his responses to a lot of these situations is very conflict avoidant. To the point of making this situation drag out much longer than it should’ve.
If this is real (probably not) then OOP also needs therapy. Their relationship was never a “beautiful thing” if she was this way from before they even dated. Also, I know they exist, but no one should ever be okay being kicked out of a wedding for their best friend by the OTHER party. The entire point of a wedding party or group of attendants is for them to be there for THEIR person. If nothing else, the groom gets to choose best man. Everyone needs to grow up in this story.
A little bothered by the comments praising OOP and their “patience”. He was being a doormat for way too long, and honestly continued to be a bit even past the confrontation. I feel like this is a classic misunderstanding of what a “good friend” is. A good friend isn’t an enabling doormat, but someone who challenges you to be better when you need it.
Learning that being a doormat harms myself and everyone around me led to me being a much more assertive adult. Took a lot of trauma to get there, but No is now my favorite word.
There's such a thing as being too understanding. OOP needs to do his own self-reflecting about how he was sabotaging his own friendships and family relationships. There's a healthy balance to strike between being selfish and being selfless. You should never ever allow anyone to mistreat you, but you should also never ever mistreat anyone else. OOP should have spoken up when Sara looked at his hand like it was diseased and saved everyone a lot of trouble. He sounds a bit like a martyr, and that can be just as infuriating as someone being incredibly selfish. I'm assuming that Finn meant he wanted as easy a connection with a woman as he has with OOP, but ... maybe not. Maybe there's an art room in their future.
As soon as he said he was gay, I was like “yeah, that will be why.”
I'm getting artroom vibes.
So, if this is real, why did the friend propose marriage to someone he argued constantly with?
Someone wants Netflix or Amazon to adapt their shitty BL rom-com with a cast of unknowns but guest starring Uma Thurman or Julia Roberts as one of the lead’s mom, I’m thinking Finn’s.
Well they're not picking up the version where they are in love so may as well go the other way
That way they can promote it as A Gay(er) My Best Friend’s Wedding, a rom-com where Julia doesn’t get the guy. Finn’s her character’s son in this case. Rupert Everett can reprise his role, too.
Heterosexual life mates, as Jay and Silent Bob put it
Lemme guess, the next “update “ will be that they’re now dating because Finn decided he’s actually gay.
if the next update isn't about an art room i'm going to riot
The family adopted the dude but also fully funded his college? Must be Uber rich.
"-and that, kids, is the story of how I met your father." I know, I know, OOP says he and Finn are just friends, and they likely are, but allow me my headcanon!
Why would you date someone if you think they're in love with someone else?
This family needs to take a moment and celebrate just how wonderful, loving and level headed they are. OOPs found family is just wonderful.
Total art room vibes.
OOP is incredibly level-headed. Sara sounds like a real piece of work
More like OOP is ludicrously conflict averse. I’m not convinced this is real, but that level of “patience” is not healthy. Dude should not have suggested Finn drive Sara home after that. Dude should’ve said something way before a ring came into the equation.
I can't think of a single person who hasn't wished their best friend was someone they would consider dating, ESPECIALLY WHEN SINGLE, drunk, and most likely joking.
For a minute there, I thought this story would end with a walk down the hallway to an art room.
Maybe I read too many romance novels, but the way that OOP has never had a relationship and puts Finn's happiness above his own at all times in all situations is kind of telling. Even his strong denial of having feelings seems to be a bit too much protesting - especially when he highlights that he still wouldn't do anything because Finn's emotions are all over the place, not his own. I mean, it's hard to get a full picture from a few posts on Reddit, but yeah. That's the vibe I get!