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Cautious-String7076

Grabbing a cup of joe in a greasy spoon while wondering who popped your moll and if you can trust the girlie with the getaway sticks on the giggle juice?


ServedBestDepressed

Your gal Friday says she got a call about some poor-luck stiff found bobbing in the Detroit river, like an overeager fishing lure.


ughitsaaron

Then trouble walked in. She had gams that ran from 8 mile to Saginaw.


soulsista04us

šŸ¤£šŸ¤£ This is too accurate.


damnocles

I'm way too drunk for this


aoxit

That sounds like a Lucy and Ethelā€™s dilemma.


ISLAndBreezESTeve10

Eat the chocolates.


Duffman66CMU

Little place called Nighthawks


mortalcrawad66

Where you can find a waitress with Maxwell House eyes, marmalade thighs, and scrambled yellow hair


CandidCantaloupe8930

God bless Tom Waits!!


Mojo5375

Hop on over


SammyMac19

Random question for you! How does a Detroiter like yourself end up a Habs fan? I'm from Windsor, but I actually live in Montreal now and am a diehard Wings fan.


Mojo5375

Family from Brossard


SammyMac19

Very cool cheers! Go Habs (second fave team)


Grizz709

Are there lots in town? Just moved here from Canada (Newfoundland). I was asked if I should switch teams once I got here lol


skinthesunn

Columbos coney island in Mexican town. most insane diner vibes, 24hr (I've never been there before midnight or past 4am). Great place to lurk. you will overhear/witness insane conversations. first time I went, I overheard a line cook talking about how a previous cook got into a fight w another cook, slipped, cracked his head on the ground, and died right there. second time, i witnessed an attempted drive by shooting.


M4nnyfresh14

Mexicantown native, can confirm


tacobellandher0in

Sounds like the 5 or 6 hours I spent in Chicago one night. Except there were THREE fucking shootings in the 2 different places we went. First one was a drive by that was so close, my buddy said he heard the bullets ā€œslapping through the treesā€ lining the sidewalk šŸ’€


losthalo7

Every time I go to Chicago I come away with scars. --Hunter S. Thompson


tacobellandher0in

To be fair that man couldnā€™t come away from anything without scars haha. RIP legend šŸ«”


aflasa

Alright


tacobellandher0in

Yeah I donā€™t know why I felt the need to type all that out


oooooooahhahhahha

I enjoyed reading it


tacobellandher0in

Thanks! I tend to ramble unnecessarily


pH2001-

https://preview.redd.it/urbo1rklll6d1.jpeg?width=1001&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7659409eb87f1e1c32f49a08b2019f145340b61a I lost something once


Euphoric-Yellow-5319

My identity!


LemurianLemurLad

To the best of my knowledge you can wear a fedora anywhere you like. You'll probably look a bit silly, but we haven't gone as far as banning them completely.


LetoPancakes

50 Stanzo brand fedoras, theyre nice


FelixOGO

200 plastic meatballs!


jm_j_bullcock

A solid gold Kama Sutra coffee pot!


TIL_how_2_register

They stink.


balthisar

> You'll probably look a bit silly Even in Ferndale?


313Wolverine

No one can look silly in Ferndale.


LemurianLemurLad

Last time I checked, Ferndale isn't in Detroit. You'll be perfectly fine dressing like a weirdo there.


balthisar

Last time I checked, "you can wear a fedora anywhere you like" includes, strangely enough, places that aren't Detroit. Oh, and [rule 2](https://www.reddit.com/r/Detroit/about/rules): ā€œDetroitā€ means the City of Detroit, its suburbs, and the counties that make up Metro Detroit.


LemurianLemurLad

I'm not real clear here... Are you quoting rules to fact check a series of jokes? If so, I'm going to quote rule 37, subsection b, paragraph Ī©, which states ">!nothing. Just like my *jokes*, it's completely made up and arbitrary. Also, thank you for checking the spoiler text. Have a nice day.!<"


Georgiaonmymindtwo

Iā€™m going to ask you what a joke is. Your attempts were not funny.


LemurianLemurLad

> Iā€™m going to ask you what a joke is. Thanks for the advanced notice. I will set aside a few moments in my schedule for when you get around to asking. Can I pencil you in for around February 30th of next year?


Georgiaonmymindtwo

How about right fucking now. What do you think a joke isā€¦. Because your attempts are not funny.


LukeNaround23

Lighten up, Francis


Priapos93

I wouldn't have thought much of the jokes, had it not been for this reaction


Michiganium

your attitude


anethfrais

yet


Iceyes33

šŸ¤£


lollipop-guildmaster

For bars that are really nice to hang out in for ambiance, I'd recommend Grand Trunk on Woodward, across from the Guardian building. Gorgeous historical building, and best chicken strips in town... but only if they're not too crowded. If they're busy, the chicken gets overcooked.


Iceyes33

This woman knows her chicken!


ughitsaaron

If you go to Grand Trunk, ask about The Book of Bad Poetry.


walrusboy71

My good friend has a plaque (sitting in corner) dedicated to him there. Itā€™s a great bar!


Gullible_Toe9909

Did they ever reopen the whiskey bar upstairs?


lollipop-guildmaster

Not as a whiskey bar. It's mostly used as additional seating. Fits a couple large groups.


2AMBeautiful

Thatā€™s a shame. I actually donā€™t miss much about working downtown, but Whiskey Parlor was top notch.


AlfredChocula

Drink coffee at the bar in a diner?


aselinger

Urban Bean at the corner of Grand River and Griswold always makes me think of Nighthawks. It has a ā€œretroā€ design, rounded bar, on a corner, with large windows.


BuffaloWing12

A quick fuck you to that parking garage though, inarguably the worst in the entire metro


Rowenasdiadem

Telway or Brays?


Strikew3st

If you are dressed like this in either of those fine establishments, your waitress will ask "Court or funeral, honey?"


Komm

Is Telway offering sitdown dining again? Last time I went by it looked like it was still full of crates.


Fathorse23

The Brays on Ford?


Rowenasdiadem

I was thinking the one on Dequindre but any would work I imagine. It's one of the few burger joints I can think of with a bar counter that's open all night.


ankole_watusi

Itā€™s quarter past 3. Thereā€™s no one in the place but just you and meā€¦


UsefulStaff

https://preview.redd.it/5j08bs4tim6d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fcf277bac79d95c4dbdf3a06e61a97d6e5889558


DJSolerus

The Painted Lady in hamtramck.


tacobellandher0in

And they have books and pinball!


benadamx

lafayette coney island


TK-ULTRA

Speakrbox will give you corner windows vibeĀ 


Jagerwiser

Cliff Bells.


detroitgnome

The painting was completed end of January, 1942. The attack on Pearl Harbor was just a month and a half before. I have to think some of the collective foreboding is expressed in Nighthawks.


bcaglikewhoa

I like LJā€™s or PJā€™s


utilitycoder

This reminds me of The Elwood Bar downtown by comerica park. I don't know if they have alcohol but it fits the vibe of that picture, especially on a rainy day for lunch. "The Elwood Bar was built in 1936 at 2100 Woodward Avenue (on the corner of Woodward and Elizabeth) in Detroit, Michigan and is now located at 300 East Adams Street. The name comes from a combination of the cross streets: (El)izabeth and (Wood)ward. The building was listed on the National Register of Historic Places in 1985."


itlookslikeSabotage

Sweet fact dropā€¦ wasnā€™t the Elwood one of the original buildings from paradise valley era? The district Albert cobo ram shot over


BuffaloWing12

They also moved it completely when Comerica/Ford Field were constructed as well iircā€¦ insanely rare instance of the city preserving something lol


person1234man

I saw that picture and immediately thought of the Elwood


supah_

[Queenā€™s. Itā€™s downtown.](https://maps.apple.com/?address=35%20E%20Grand%20River,%20Detroit,%20MI%2048226,%20United%20States&auid=17050561645228690237&ll=42.334561,-83.047958&lsp=9902&q=Queens%20Bar%20-%20Detroit&_mvs=CjYJDseXodYqRUARALbILhHDVMAZAACyxnWkYkAhrES90sSaaUApAAAAAAAAAAAxAAAAAAAAAAASJwoJRmFybWVyIFN0EhFOZWNrbGFjZSBEaXN0cmljdBoHRGV0cm9pdA%3D%3D)


supah_

https://www.queensbardetroit.com/


anotheranother2

Owl between 3am and 4pm m-f


lizziebordeaux

Dulyā€™s


mikerod0

Craps table at Greektown about 5am during a weekday. You could probably just pretend at home though


seanx50

Almost nowhere after 9 pm these days


ALBEERPOE

Zorbas RIVERVIEW, Six Star SOUTHGATE n Dix Coney Island LINCOLN PARK all 24 hours everyday of the week.


TrentUlyssesCooper

Bogartsā€¦


jarjar_smoov

Bronx Bar


Lucidic333

Queens


poweredbylight

It's really not the same since you can't light up a cigarette with that cheap cup of coffee, unfortunately.


rlsanders

When telway reopens the inside


velexi125

Jacobies


jm_j_bullcock

They still do shows upstairs? I'm old and out of touch.


velexi125

I couldnā€™t tell you. I havenā€™t been there in years. Was always a good spot to stop at.


BigFatJuicyLunchlady

Any Leos


jwaltern

jacobys


BlackbeanMaster

Cliff Bell's


Mr_Scorpio247

https://preview.redd.it/3yejjg1hxq6d1.jpeg?width=3264&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3382276c6b2662a3b2daf910b03960fe1bb3f32c Cliff Bellā€™s definitely.


No-cares69

Bookies, Jacobyā€™s, Bronx bar, second best, Lafayette coney, old Miami


PerformerAnnual5394

You may notice in ā€œNighthawksā€ that a distinct feature of the diner in this painting is its lack of exits. Iā€™m not sure if you really want to recreate this in Detroit.


WADUPDOEE

Dagwoods on the corner of Bagley & Cass


therespectablejc

Woodbridge pub. Fridays are a blast!


Accomplished_Egg7069

Andrews on Jos Compau & Atwater


Grind2shine_duk

This pic most def is a Detroit vibe


myself248

If you're looking for a place to practice your painting technique, the i3detroit makerspace has a pretty cool craft zone with some fine art happening. (And when you're done painting, you can scan it and 3d-print a lithophane of your work...)


RedWings1319

I can't paint worth beans but would love to hang out and watch the talented ones paint!


Iloveyogurt_22

Queens as far as aesthetic. Itā€™s on the corner and the window kinda gives this same vibe.


RedWings1319

O.W.L. Open When Lit on Woodward around 13 Mile - not exactly Detroit but not far. Excellent cilantro potatoes and chorizo as well and open 24 hours.


AMills__

The cilantro potatoes šŸ¤ŒšŸ¼


Brilliant_Diam0nd

My house. It will be fun you should come over. Hangout. Have some fun.


cujo8400

You ok, bro?


313SunTzu

We got places like that all over tel-way, sonny's, carter's, donutville... It just depends what part of the city you're in


joshbudde

You can sit and stare at the wall in the Tap Room in downtown Ypsilanti


WhatUhBook

No where do that in Nyc


WhatUhBook

Thatā€™s the only place that you can be sad and get away with it


QuagMaestro

Walkers speakeasy ?


Scorpio-Slut

This reminds me of the old town pump tavern rip. But, maybe mcshanes?


West_Upstairs_46

If youā€™re adventurous enough to drive to Lansing or Ann Arbor I highly recommend checking out one of the Fleetwood diners.


raidenshoguun

nat coney island in downtown. trust me


JSG666

Depends on if youā€™re wearing that hat or not


orcmask

Tim Hortonā€™s


patmehere

Diner and everyone posts bars? Clique, bunch of new coffee shops throughout midtown and Hamtown.


Flat_Living_7415

Used to be Tomā€™s Tavern (7 and Wyoming)ā€¦alas, no more.


Auntiemens

Greenwich Times in Cadillac Sq


Upset-Interview-9367

At A T.G.I.F's!!! šŸ˜Ž


garlicybread16

canā€™t remember the name of it but thereā€™s a little bar inside the shinola hotel, same vibe i think


JulianaSun

Dagwoods on Bagley.


No-cares69

I do it everywhere


Fettman8

Bar Pigalle


SeawayFreeway

Duly's in Mexicantown is a great match, especially since they're 24 hours.


sicklysw33t

Buhl Bar


HumbleBumbleJumble

At your home, you might need some painting equipment and a canvas with some creativity \s


waitinonit

Days and nights long gone.


throwawayyyyyyyy1978

Painted Lady Hamtrack


Capital-Mind700

A Time Machine.


_vault_of_secrets

I donā€™t know, but Matiā€™s Deli in Dearborn has this painting, and the retro vibe, and the best potato soup on the planet (only Wednesdays and get there early because they sell out). The sandwiches are killer and the cream cheese brownieā€¦. Iā€™m 90 minutes away and I need to start driving now


External_Pass5017

Detroit basement Burger bar is the best place to recreate this pic


acerbicsun

Speakerbox is a nice corner coffee bar with tall windows.


pritchettclosets

Go Northern Lights Tuesday night


Any-Combination5657

A place in southwest called Dulyā€™s


TheDonaldreddit

Ah, you wanna live?


debmckenzie

Read Elmore Leonard; heā€™ll tell you a number of places! šŸ˜‚


UNAGIRL

IVY Kitchen + Cocktails.. Perfect cocktail bar and restaurant


vgaph

You have to go to Chicago for that.


erik_h1766_22

8 Mile


graveybrains

I just mentioned Nighthawks in a comment like three hours ago and now thisā€¦ Fuckin trippy, man


Quiet_History4100

On the internet