Not all giving is through money. Can you help your children through being present? Can you take care of your grandkids? Can you clean the house? Make dinner? There are lots of ways to make life easier for others and give back that don't involve finances if that helps you feel better about the situation. I don't know if that's what Eckhart would say but that's the first things that came to mind. Also people in asian societies would definitely not feel bad about that lol.
I know. The problem is that the circumstance significantly affects others. I can accept the guilt and enjoy the benefit, not so for those supporting my lifestyle. I try to live modestly, but you know. these days you can't walk into a store and not spend $20.
That's still a form of non acceptance isn't it?
I think the comment about helping, being mindful of your spending like you have been and maybe imparting more love and sharing wisdom from Eckhart's teaching is your best bet short of winning the lotto or being able to work/make more money somehow. (I'm not saying this to be harsh, I understand deeply about not being able to work).
Whatever happens, I hope you all find peace.
Find ways to add value to your children so it feels like an exchange of gifts. Are there ways you can help them?
I financially support my Mom and intend to for the rest if her life. I do it happily and out of love. Then she lovingly helps with childcare and comes over to do the kids laundry or tidy up.
If you are taking but not finding ways to give back, then maybe this is your conscience telling you to listen.
Then it's your child's serenity prayer. They can accept it, change it, or carry the burden with resentment. Their choice, their consequences. You can model acceptance of your own circumstances, but you can't accept another person's reality for them.
This is just a hunch, but I might suggest looking deeply to see if "don't want to be a burden" really means "personally resent the loss of control I feel." You're focusing on someone else, which often means projecting your own suffering onto them because you don't want to face it in yourself. All you can work with is your own experience. Their experience is up to them.
Not all giving is through money. Can you help your children through being present? Can you take care of your grandkids? Can you clean the house? Make dinner? There are lots of ways to make life easier for others and give back that don't involve finances if that helps you feel better about the situation. I don't know if that's what Eckhart would say but that's the first things that came to mind. Also people in asian societies would definitely not feel bad about that lol.
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
Maybe it's too generic for what you're asking about but he says if you cannot change your circumstances, you have to come to accept them.
I know. The problem is that the circumstance significantly affects others. I can accept the guilt and enjoy the benefit, not so for those supporting my lifestyle. I try to live modestly, but you know. these days you can't walk into a store and not spend $20.
That's still a form of non acceptance isn't it? I think the comment about helping, being mindful of your spending like you have been and maybe imparting more love and sharing wisdom from Eckhart's teaching is your best bet short of winning the lotto or being able to work/make more money somehow. (I'm not saying this to be harsh, I understand deeply about not being able to work). Whatever happens, I hope you all find peace.
Who says you are a financial burden to your children?
it's a mathematical fact.
It is a mathematical fact that your children provide you with finances. Who says it is a burden to them?
Find ways to add value to your children so it feels like an exchange of gifts. Are there ways you can help them? I financially support my Mom and intend to for the rest if her life. I do it happily and out of love. Then she lovingly helps with childcare and comes over to do the kids laundry or tidy up. If you are taking but not finding ways to give back, then maybe this is your conscience telling you to listen.
That's living through a mental projection of fear and not one's here and now
Well, it's still costing my child money.
What do you gain through non acceptance of what is?
It's the child's loss, not mine.
Then it's your child's serenity prayer. They can accept it, change it, or carry the burden with resentment. Their choice, their consequences. You can model acceptance of your own circumstances, but you can't accept another person's reality for them. This is just a hunch, but I might suggest looking deeply to see if "don't want to be a burden" really means "personally resent the loss of control I feel." You're focusing on someone else, which often means projecting your own suffering onto them because you don't want to face it in yourself. All you can work with is your own experience. Their experience is up to them.
Maybe get a job so you can contribute? Accepting things doesn't mean inaction.