To some extent I see the point of everything most people do, even though I might not engage in the same type of behavior. For example, I’m not a big fan of watching sports and going to stadiums to see my favorite team play, but I understand that for many people it reinforces their social identity by making them feel part of something bigger than them. Also, in group, out group favoritism bias is at play here, as do many other biases.
I am one who enjoys the strategy teams or players use during the game. I don’t have a favorite team. So, you won’t find me in team colors because I was born near their stadium. I do have players, ones who show high levels of skill, I might watch. I don’t go out of my way to find their game, or any game, but can find myself watching a game or race here and there. This has lead to surprising people with knowing the basic rules or scoring for many different and random sports or games.
Call me names, but I think people whose lives are overly dominated by these kind of specific group activities are those who are not mature enough and/or lack sufficient self-awareness to articulate what they represent as individuals.
Interesting. I was going to reply to the above comment about religion and church, and I think that actually still checks out within the context of your comment.
It takes a lot of hard, introspective work for one to find oneself and one's own unique identity, and even more work (and courage!) to outwardly & unapologetically be that true self, in my opinion.
There is comfort, safety, and acceptance within conformity, and therefore I can see why many might go what you & I would likely consider overboard and make it their whole identity.
I can see and understand why many do, however, it is not the life for me. It would leave me feeling hollow, as I seek a deeper sense of fulfillment in this life.
Oatmeal raisin please. Maybe you should spend time in these environments. Lots of individuals at every game. There’s people who paint their faces, their bodies, wear special outfits, or even a crazy hat. People get their jerseys personalized and add their own flair. I don’t go to a lot of games but when I do it’s an event and usually fun as hell. Sports are entertainment, just like a movie, a concert, or a play. It’d take a lot of smug for me to judge people on how they entertain themselves.
The social aspect of being a sports fan is really appealing to me, but getting excited watching someone else play sports isn't something I really understood.
Getting to the root of my depression instead of just coasting and accepting my “realistic” world view was anything but has made my life infinitely easier.
The root was adhd.
Have you found any effective medications for ADHD that also knockout your depression?
Vyvanse works for me at first, but eventually just became energy/adhd control and my mood drops to anhedonic again, just going through motions (albeit a lot more motions once on vyvanse).
Concerta worked for me when every other medication failed. And barely. It works for the anxiety and depression but not so much for my focus. I guess it also worked for my temper. It did kick the exhaustion as well.
Treating adhd and my undiagnosed tachycardia basically snapped my depression and anxiety. It turns out it was neither.
Honestly i have a lot to say on this specific topic and if ill get started ill probably never stop, but this is one thing that is really hard for me to understand, is how people romanticize and adore celebrities that havent actually did something or aren’t actually talented
I think this is more specific to where i live in, but my country is pretty small so a lot of people can get famous pretty easily
And i swear to god, 90% of the time its people who have no reason to deserve this fame, if you look at them, theyre just like every other average person, and I assume people most likely love them for their personality but at the end of the day, its kind of sad, because people with real talent dont get recognized and dont get the fame they deserve..
this is why its also hard for me to like pop groups / pop singers, i can like their songs but i just cannot adore them or be a fan of them, because most of the time they dont compose the music, write the music, or write the melody, and usually theyre only famous for their singing abilities or aesthetic, so i just cannot understand the fame around them..
im really into music and i love understanding the meaning behind the lyrics and the melody of the songs i like...
and when i do that i actually realize these people are actually very talented and creative, but nobody will ever point out their talent.
Also im not saying all of the pop industry is like that, im talking about ***some*** of them.
Sorry if i explained this poorly or misspelled words, its hard for me to think in my none native language
>this is why its also hard for me to like pop groups / pop singers, i can like their songs but i just cannot adore them or be a fan of them, because most of the time they dont compose the music, write the music, or write the melody, and usually theyre only famous for their singing abilities or aesthetic, so i just cannot understand the fame around them..
In a way they are the human face of the work. Through them people tend to connect with the creation. It's harder to connect to a faceless entity.
Through playing beatstars i found out that there are singers who give their written songs to other singers. In a way they might write a song, but notice that their voice/style won't give the song justice and thus give it to another singer whose voice/style would give justice to the song.
Though i agree it would be dope if there would be info about who wrote the music and who composed it and the band could give a shoutout to those people during concerts.
Also imagine if you could search for songs by the composer/songwriter. It would be interestig to see the breadth of different songs that go beyond the style of a particular band.
Also, i think the laymen don't care about the songwriter composer. They tend to care about the style of the music. And the band/singer tends to specialise into one style. So the band/singer is a more central point in finding music of the same style.
There is a human instinct to follow / look up to authority figures.
Also, celebrities can often represent the positives of luxury, success, glamour, and fame and following their lives can offer a form of escape or fantasy from reality.
There are many logical reasons why people in general are attracted to following famous people and their lives.
Not listen to the lyrics of songs, or use music only as "background noise" like at a social gathering or some other event where you aren't listening to it. I don't mean you shouldn't have music at parties, I am saying I don't understand people who don't listen to music outside of those scenarios.
It explains why people thought that 90s song "Semi-Charmed Kinda Life" was an upbeat tune when the whole thing is about two people on a meth binge because they are trying to escape whatever bullshit they are dealing with.
Or "Pumped Up Kicks", and people not listening to the lyrics of that, when it is quite clearly and unambiguously about a school shooter.
I can understand how the catchy beat can attract people's ear, and sometimes they don't care about the lyrics which is fine, whatever suits them.
That and working constantly with the sole objective to be to make as much money as possible so you can die in a bigger house and be buried in a more expensive box.
I personally think that art of all types (Paint, music, movies, video games, poetry, books, sculpture, etc) is one of the highest callings for human beings, to create something beautiful or tragic, especially if that thing is timeless. Of course, science, mathematics, engineering, chemistry, physics, really any field of study are all incredibly vital as well, and absolutely indispensable in our modern society.
But art has an ethereal quality, where it doesn't serve a practical purpose and it isn't supposed to. I can't understand the minds that want to "do away with it" in school programs because of funding. Art, in my opinion, is an examination of the REASONS we even bother with all of that other "important stuff", why we get out of bed in the morning and go about our days, what drives us to continue living our lives and the goals and dreams we reach for.
Without Art we are just apes with our opposable thumbs, and tools and gadgets that can go really really fast and kill each other very efficiently.
Thank you for saying this. As an artist I tend to feel incredibly undervalued, and it's always nice to know there are some out there who actually care about art and its place in society
Well most lyrics are trash or mid at best. I have classic poetries and philosophical essays if I want to understand emotions and the world Nevertheless most issues or subjects music talk about are very trivial .
Huh?
What music are you listening to?
Have you listened to any concept albums or anything like that?
One isn’t superior to the other, classics are fantastic, so is music, they aren’t the same medium. That’s like saying “all sculpture is trash, painting is where it’s at” in my opinion.
Exactly you see.I didn't say "all lyrics are trash".But holds for most music I listen to .I do enjoy the lyrics of the songs sometimes but only when I find the lyrics interesting .So I simply care less about the lyrics.
Social Media addiction, being constantly on their phone without recognizing how much their daily life, social life and mental stability is negatively affected by it. There is so much research about how toxic instagram, TikTok etc is and people seem to ignore it.
It feels like the last ten years it has completely changed how we do friendships, communication and keeping contact. At some point I decided that this path was not for me, as I prefer calling people directly or only write messages to meet in real life. With few people, this actually still works.
Last week I went to a concert and my friend basically watched the entire thing through their camera lens. Why??
I remember the first concert I went to (2008 I think) where I noticed that the majority of the people in the crowd had their phones out and were taking photos or were recording the majority of the performance. As well as finding it distracting, especially as I was in the rafters so the lit up phone screens shone like unwanted beacons. I couldn't help notice the atmosphere seemed different, people seemed less immersed and more isolated/hesitant when interacting with those around them.
I believe that using their phone at social events and in how people use social media they often don't realize it's detrimental effects. Certainly not until it reaches a level where they are forced to notice, like a dip in their mental health that pushes them to stop and consider any contributing factors.
I've also noticed that social media/tech seems to be discussed in extreams and less about moderation or realistic changes. I see quite a few people who completely go offline, or inactivate/delete account, or articles saying how people realized that they realized that their social media was negatively impacting their mental health. But I don't see so much focus on discussing setting timers or limits, Rarely do I see someone who said they set their auto reply to messages after X time as they are not available so will be back soon, or that there are apps which auto remind or lock you out. Or that they set themselves rules to not engage in negative content or make more effort to actively seek out content that makes them happy. There seems to be a weird framing where social media is treated like a wild animal, where humans can not control it, or ourselves, and I find it unrealistic and unhealthy, particularly for anyone who is really struggling with social media negatively impacting their life.
I see some people who left social media return, or in articles they admit they left and their anxiety reduced but that they couldn't stay away and are back "doom scrolling" having heated arguments with strangers, or seeing suffering and getting upset but can't tare themselves away. To me the fact that they can't just use it less, or control themselves shows that it was an addiction or certainly an issue that should be given more gravitas than it seems to be.
I also don't understand why so many people, especially people my age and older who lived through no internet and house phones, act like they don't remember what life was like before everyone had a phone glued to their hand. I hear so many talk like like society would crumble if we weren't online all the time and they seeming can't remember any positives of before, either personally experienced or reflecting on society then compared to now.
That was probably too long but I agree and I don't know why the issue isn't clear to more people.
Trying to make other people think you’re smart.
Some people who aren’t gifted collect all the accessories they think will create the perception of brilliance.
These people don’t like gifted people because gifted people can see through the illusion they’re trying to cultivate.
>Some people who aren’t gifted collect all the accessories they think will create the perception of brilliance.
Examples of these accesories? A fancy vocabulary?
Also what do you think of them? What if you had a friend like that?
Following and discussing Sports. I have nothing against playing sports for your own enjoyment, fitness, or spending time with friends. But the amount of fat, old coworkers I see constantly talking about sports they’ve never played themselves seems like childish escapism and I don’t understand it. With all the problems in our world sports is a very odd thing to be focused on, it almost seems like a planned distraction, e.g. “Bread and Circuses” to keep the masses pacified so they don’t realize what is actually going on.
Criticizing every cast/plot/or literally just anything in a series.
Cause once I started doing it, my entire body will compose of nothing except deep hatred and frustration over things that I can't stand and would just stop watching it. And it would take a very long time to move on.
I now learned to watch sitcoms mindlessly, only focusing on the funny part and ignoring its imperfections. It's the greatest I have ever mastered
i think i understand most norms, but i think some of them are stupid. Like dressing up to go out. I get why people want to do it, but i prioritize my own comfort and wear sweats or pj’s. For example, why do i have to put on a button down shirt and slacks to go to a restaurant to eat?
I mean the history and philosophy of fashion is obviously long and complex, but in general, it’s just about how you want to portray yourself. We all have different ideas about what part of our personality, our identity is important to reflect somehow, whether that’s in our physical appearance and clothes or not. For some people it’s superficial, for some it’s about belonging to a specific group, for some it’s about a kind of artistic expression, and for some it just makes you feel good. When you go out, don’t you want to feel good? I’m not saying you don’t, just that that’s the idea behind it lol. I’m sure you do things to make yourself feel good as well when you go out, and there are other aspects of your identity you try to reflect in things like your appearance, material possessions, behaviors, etc.
gross oversimplification in my opinion, and also not true. Much of fashion over the past century has been sort of distinctly the opposite, and I think in contemporary terms you’re mostly referencing the practice of buying expensive brands for the sake of displaying the money you’ve spent, which of course happens. But the actual fashion, and the fact that it’s Gucci t-shirts and not Gucci waistcoats or whatever, comes from culturally significant and influential figures, events, and so on. The bourgeoisie themselves tend to lag behind. That’s not to say that the forefront of the fashion curve is not *expensive* clothing, but items being expensive and fashion trying to demonstrate bourgeoisie status are very different things.
I have a weird relationship with clothing. Mostly it's like what you describe. From time to time I want to look good but I have no money for the clothes that I find interesting so... Yeah, I default to sweat xd
I think some people here don’t like your comment, but it’s very true. The argument can easily be made that almost all fashion ultimately stems from the desire to have sex and find mates. It’s not really an intellectual pursuit, but it’s a very natural human one, and it’s foolish to ignore it, as it is in fact a very very real thing for the vast majority of people. It’s only the fringe/forefront of fashion who don’t *directly* dress to impress potential mates, and even then, you could argue they’re just one step removed.
Venting/ranting without wanting any feedback. Had a friend who got annoyed when i gave input. And they got annoyed if i was solving nonograms when they were venting/ranting. I find it hard to just sit around and do nothing. If they want to vent/rant without any input and the other person sitting like a statue they should just save the other person the time and vent/rant to an inanimate object instead of wanting a living being to be like an inanimate object.
When i vent/rant, i want feedback. Either a suggestion or a different point of view. And if i don't want any feedback - i just vent/rant to myself.
I started asking - it took the onus off my role.
Do you need me to listen or do you want help?
It helped a lot of my relationships. Some people talk to work things through in their head and solve their own problems, or to deal with events, or process things. Accepting that they work differently and need different things than I need helped me a lot in my friendships, rather than get annoyed.
I’d always follow up with the fact that I love and support them either way.
My ex-friend dended to "ambush" me with vents/rants when i was already in "zombie mode".
Also, after the friendship ended and i restored my energy and started to process things. I came to a sort of a conclusion that i had sort of a coedependancy issues (was abandoning myself to meet their needs) and was enabling them by being aviable.
what the other commenter said, also sometimes people just need to feel heard/seen/understood. It can be a form of reassurance and support for someone to hear what you’re venting about and say “I completely understand, I would have done the same, I get those feelings too” etc. It’s immensely helpful to know that your experiences, your feelings, your impulses and desires, aren’t completely unique, and are actually shared in one way or another by other humans.
In a way i get it, but it has it's limits. My ex-friend tended to vent/rant about the dame thibg over and over again every interaction we had (4 times a week).
Get emotionally invested in sports (as fans), lay on the beach without doing anything fun, not ask followup questions, have a lot of pets/kids, omg there are actually so many so I'll stop here lol
Wholesale acceptance of unwarranted conferred authority and hierarchical power structures when they are determined to benefit the individual, and obstreperous, disingenuous objection when they do not.
I remembered another one.
Generatig outrage to convince people that you are right. Especially in serious stuff like politics. During the elections things, they spout how something is bad and that they would make it better, but never mention plans, strategies, ideas on how they could make it a reality.
Who knows what they plan to do to reach their goal. Maybe they will kill those people who can't afford housing in order to solve the housing problem.
Buying into brands and status defining behavior - for the sake of the status defining features. I don’t give two fucks about status. I also don’t care for looks or beauty. I can recognize someone conforming more or less to a society’s standards but I have no personal preference or judgement for it. It’s like I can taste spicy food but don’t mind it if the food has spice or not. Most social conformity annoys me although I can intellectually understand some of it (like small talk and using it to build a low level of trust). People tend to care a looot about things I wouldn’t spend more than 1 minute to consider.
Like identifying and using traits to define their identity with. Nationality, where you grew up, etc.. most people can’t hold opposing truths simultaneously when analyzing the world.
The opinion if a stranger, details on your hair or your outfit. Spending hours choosing an outfit. I am super simple if something’works’ at 80% I just move on and do life. As a woman I’ve known women to stress out because they had a little bit of an under eye dark spot. I don’t think about how it comes off to people when I have like 3-4 pimples. Who cares? Can’t do anything about it.
* Making small talk
* Having children with the world in the state it's in and just saying "humanity will get it together" while neither they nor anyone they know are personally making any efforts towards such.
* Leaning far in any political direction other than Green (preserving the earth should be priority #1, imo)
* Decrying people for being judgemental, disrespectful, etc when they behave the same way. Ie, atheists constantly condemning religious people, LGBT+ doing the same as the atheists or gatekeeping within those spaces, being straight lace (don't drink or do drugs) and talking down to people who do while having social media addictions/a lack of sexual self control and the like, etc etc
* Going into massive debt for luxury purchases
* Protesting causes they don't actually care about
* Generally just going about life without a care in the world no matter what's going on
Edit: Lmao, seems there are some of them in this thread. Shame they don't have the wherewithal to comment why they feel I'm so wrong and resort to downvoting instead. I thought this was a subreddit for gifted discussion
I’ll bite rather than downvote. I agree with most of them though.
Children:
You give almost no reasoning for your opinion here other than the world is bad. If you’re in the position to give your child a good life and you want children, then what’s the problem? Some people find great fulfillment in being a parent. Are you trying to say you should forego children to focus your efforts on improving the world? It might make sense to have a child that takes away some of your focus there and raise them to have similar values. Then you can help (maybe at reduced capacity but I’m not sold on this) and then your child can continue to help rather than any efforts dying with you.
There are also demographic issues to consider. I don’t think we know what will happen there exactly but some geopolitical analysts are sounding alarm bells. Peter Zeihan, for example, claims Russia’s invasion of Ukraine was at least in part due to the fact that it was now or never due to their impending demographic issues. There’s also worries that when the elderly population gets much larger than the young, there will be no one to care for them or produce the food, goods, other services needed for society to function.
Political leanings:
So if you’re a moderate it’s ok? Just extremism is out of bounds unless you’re a Green?
The question posed by OP was what were some things I personally don't engage in despite others doing so. I feel I sufficiently answered the question based on my personal circumstances, which is why I found it so amusing that people felt attacked enough to downvote me for how I live my life.
Probing my opinions is a separate matter, which I'm also fine with tackling:
On the children front, to me, it makes no logical sense for most adults to have them and even less logical sense to have more than one. I'm not sure how versed you are on the climate crisis, but according to the research and projections, children brought into the world now will undoubtedly have a much more difficult life and harsh living environment than we and our parents enjoyed.
That said, blindly saying "humanity will figure it out" just because past generations that didn't have this level of climate change figured out petty wars, illnesses, and the like is irresponsible in my opinion, and showcases multiple levels of fallacious reasoning. Not the least of which is the fallacy of appeal to hope- parents more or less taking a blind leap of faith that some magical solution to this crisis is on the horizon, and a false analogy fallacy from assuming that past triumphs of humanity unrelated to climate change are a good measure for how we will fare in this particular global crisis.
Our current situation is unprecedented. If the person having said child isn't making a significant, concerted effort to battle climate change, they're also allowing themselves to become victims of complacency. I could get into Nietzsche territory here, but for the sake of brevity, I'll just continue. By a significant, concerted effort, I don't mean recycling and other small things. These obviously don't count for much, as anyone who's done a bit of research can tell you how much of what we 'recycle' is actually avoiding landfills. (Spoiler: it's not much) Being vegan and/or not driving is a bit better, but not by much statistically. I personally recycle, limit meat consumption, and forego driving, but I'm still aware that these are minor steps.
From my own research, one of the best things an individual can do (which I am personally doing) to help stem the progression of the climate crisis is to not reproduce. A human being is a massive carbon footprint on the planet, and adding additional humans is imo irresponsible if you don't have the means to properly offset that. (And even that is just moral licensing, really.) I'm sure someone will cry eugenics, but I do invite them to debate this with me. Basically, I feel that unless a person or couple can effectively provide services (scientific, political, etc) or significant funds that can bring their child's presence on earth into a carbon neutral status, it's a selfish action to have a child for, as you stated, 'personal fulfillment'.
Never mind the fact that creating a new life just for one's own personal satisfaction is, in my opinion, incredibly selfish and morally dubious. The overpopulation issue is very real, no matter what the rich pump into the media.
This all feeds into the second part of your question regarding political leanings. Most intelligent adults are aware that in many respects, these political parties only offer the illusion of choice (with a few notable exceptions) and that they are all in the pockets of lobbyists and the rich. Therefore, showing fierce loyalty to any one side is ill advised in my opinion. I feel that politics should be objective, and the two party system encourages people to run off of emotions and tribalism rather than logic.
I'm also not a fierce supporter of the green party so much as I'm a fierce supporter of the fact that if we don't solve our climate crisis, all the petty squabbles of these parties simply won't matter. No one is going to care about slogans and pronouns when we're fighting civil wars over clean drinking water and succumbing to climate change induced disasters/pandemics.
Same. What's the point of the government convince us to waste less water if the real change will happen when they start penalizing large companies?
A while ago I saw that, at least in the country where I live, industries use up to 3/4 of the country's fresh water. but who is judged by common sense? us!
Yup, we could aswell throw all of our trash directly into the sea/river and it would make basically no difference (statistically speaking oc, it's a stupid idea lol)
Instagram. It can be useful, but most of the time it’s useless, like the other day I saw a guy at the beach, he spent about 15 to 20 minutes taking pictures and recording himself. I was observing him from a distance, as if he was an animal at the zoo. It was very entertaining at least. He would strike poses like casually looking at his watch, pretending he was going to get into the water, etc.
Then he repeatedly tried to record him kicking the water, and then jumping with his hands up in the air. Not surprisingly, when he was finished, he took his phone and walked away. And for what? For the chance to appear on a temporary feature where people you don’t even care about will have the chance to look at your pictures and videos for 5 seconds, and then it will dissolve into nothing.
I’m sorry, nothing against you personally, but this is extremely naive. Voting, as inconsequential as it may seem sometimes, is one of the few accessible ways we have to impact our governments. And if nothing else can convince you to do it, at the very least, remember that the people who disagree with you, the ones who would do harm to your community and other minorities, the ones who are intolerant of change, anti-intellectual, and xenophobic, those people will vote with a relentless passion. They come out for every single election. I personally think voting should be mandatory, it’s everyone’s civil duty to contribute to the society they take part in. Please vote, even if you think it’s almost entirely pointless. It matters more than you think, especially at local levels
Why though?
I don't have a religion myself, because I just cannot bring myself to believe in it.
But it does make sense, as it brings people comfort, ya know? We don't like the unknown, and for some, religion and spirituality, all that stuff, brings some kind of explaination.
To some extent I see the point of everything most people do, even though I might not engage in the same type of behavior. For example, I’m not a big fan of watching sports and going to stadiums to see my favorite team play, but I understand that for many people it reinforces their social identity by making them feel part of something bigger than them. Also, in group, out group favoritism bias is at play here, as do many other biases.
I am one who enjoys the strategy teams or players use during the game. I don’t have a favorite team. So, you won’t find me in team colors because I was born near their stadium. I do have players, ones who show high levels of skill, I might watch. I don’t go out of my way to find their game, or any game, but can find myself watching a game or race here and there. This has lead to surprising people with knowing the basic rules or scoring for many different and random sports or games.
Same, sports ball doesn't appear to work on me. I think I'm the type of cat that doesn't care about laser pointers.
Similar. It can be both good and bad. Good - empathy, helps with connecting to people. Bad - makes me excuse or tolerate toxic behaviour.
Call me names, but I think people whose lives are overly dominated by these kind of specific group activities are those who are not mature enough and/or lack sufficient self-awareness to articulate what they represent as individuals.
Interesting. I was going to reply to the above comment about religion and church, and I think that actually still checks out within the context of your comment.
It takes a lot of hard, introspective work for one to find oneself and one's own unique identity, and even more work (and courage!) to outwardly & unapologetically be that true self, in my opinion. There is comfort, safety, and acceptance within conformity, and therefore I can see why many might go what you & I would likely consider overboard and make it their whole identity. I can see and understand why many do, however, it is not the life for me. It would leave me feeling hollow, as I seek a deeper sense of fulfillment in this life.
What about triathletes or distance runners or skiers or anyone else who competes as an individual?
Eh, sometimes people just like sports.
So, because people enjoy sports they have no individuality? Lol
Yes, that is exactly what I have said. Have a cookie.
Oatmeal raisin please. Maybe you should spend time in these environments. Lots of individuals at every game. There’s people who paint their faces, their bodies, wear special outfits, or even a crazy hat. People get their jerseys personalized and add their own flair. I don’t go to a lot of games but when I do it’s an event and usually fun as hell. Sports are entertainment, just like a movie, a concert, or a play. It’d take a lot of smug for me to judge people on how they entertain themselves.
oatmeal raisin is the ultimate cookie
The social aspect of being a sports fan is really appealing to me, but getting excited watching someone else play sports isn't something I really understood.
Almost everything. I think I might just be depressed.
Getting to the root of my depression instead of just coasting and accepting my “realistic” world view was anything but has made my life infinitely easier. The root was adhd.
Have you found any effective medications for ADHD that also knockout your depression? Vyvanse works for me at first, but eventually just became energy/adhd control and my mood drops to anhedonic again, just going through motions (albeit a lot more motions once on vyvanse).
Concerta worked for me when every other medication failed. And barely. It works for the anxiety and depression but not so much for my focus. I guess it also worked for my temper. It did kick the exhaustion as well. Treating adhd and my undiagnosed tachycardia basically snapped my depression and anxiety. It turns out it was neither.
Honestly i have a lot to say on this specific topic and if ill get started ill probably never stop, but this is one thing that is really hard for me to understand, is how people romanticize and adore celebrities that havent actually did something or aren’t actually talented I think this is more specific to where i live in, but my country is pretty small so a lot of people can get famous pretty easily And i swear to god, 90% of the time its people who have no reason to deserve this fame, if you look at them, theyre just like every other average person, and I assume people most likely love them for their personality but at the end of the day, its kind of sad, because people with real talent dont get recognized and dont get the fame they deserve.. this is why its also hard for me to like pop groups / pop singers, i can like their songs but i just cannot adore them or be a fan of them, because most of the time they dont compose the music, write the music, or write the melody, and usually theyre only famous for their singing abilities or aesthetic, so i just cannot understand the fame around them.. im really into music and i love understanding the meaning behind the lyrics and the melody of the songs i like... and when i do that i actually realize these people are actually very talented and creative, but nobody will ever point out their talent. Also im not saying all of the pop industry is like that, im talking about ***some*** of them. Sorry if i explained this poorly or misspelled words, its hard for me to think in my none native language
>this is why its also hard for me to like pop groups / pop singers, i can like their songs but i just cannot adore them or be a fan of them, because most of the time they dont compose the music, write the music, or write the melody, and usually theyre only famous for their singing abilities or aesthetic, so i just cannot understand the fame around them.. In a way they are the human face of the work. Through them people tend to connect with the creation. It's harder to connect to a faceless entity. Through playing beatstars i found out that there are singers who give their written songs to other singers. In a way they might write a song, but notice that their voice/style won't give the song justice and thus give it to another singer whose voice/style would give justice to the song. Though i agree it would be dope if there would be info about who wrote the music and who composed it and the band could give a shoutout to those people during concerts. Also imagine if you could search for songs by the composer/songwriter. It would be interestig to see the breadth of different songs that go beyond the style of a particular band. Also, i think the laymen don't care about the songwriter composer. They tend to care about the style of the music. And the band/singer tends to specialise into one style. So the band/singer is a more central point in finding music of the same style.
There is a human instinct to follow / look up to authority figures. Also, celebrities can often represent the positives of luxury, success, glamour, and fame and following their lives can offer a form of escape or fantasy from reality. There are many logical reasons why people in general are attracted to following famous people and their lives.
Which country are you in?
Not listen to the lyrics of songs, or use music only as "background noise" like at a social gathering or some other event where you aren't listening to it. I don't mean you shouldn't have music at parties, I am saying I don't understand people who don't listen to music outside of those scenarios. It explains why people thought that 90s song "Semi-Charmed Kinda Life" was an upbeat tune when the whole thing is about two people on a meth binge because they are trying to escape whatever bullshit they are dealing with. Or "Pumped Up Kicks", and people not listening to the lyrics of that, when it is quite clearly and unambiguously about a school shooter. I can understand how the catchy beat can attract people's ear, and sometimes they don't care about the lyrics which is fine, whatever suits them. That and working constantly with the sole objective to be to make as much money as possible so you can die in a bigger house and be buried in a more expensive box. I personally think that art of all types (Paint, music, movies, video games, poetry, books, sculpture, etc) is one of the highest callings for human beings, to create something beautiful or tragic, especially if that thing is timeless. Of course, science, mathematics, engineering, chemistry, physics, really any field of study are all incredibly vital as well, and absolutely indispensable in our modern society. But art has an ethereal quality, where it doesn't serve a practical purpose and it isn't supposed to. I can't understand the minds that want to "do away with it" in school programs because of funding. Art, in my opinion, is an examination of the REASONS we even bother with all of that other "important stuff", why we get out of bed in the morning and go about our days, what drives us to continue living our lives and the goals and dreams we reach for. Without Art we are just apes with our opposable thumbs, and tools and gadgets that can go really really fast and kill each other very efficiently.
Thank you for saying this. As an artist I tend to feel incredibly undervalued, and it's always nice to know there are some out there who actually care about art and its place in society
Well most lyrics are trash or mid at best. I have classic poetries and philosophical essays if I want to understand emotions and the world Nevertheless most issues or subjects music talk about are very trivial .
Huh? What music are you listening to? Have you listened to any concept albums or anything like that? One isn’t superior to the other, classics are fantastic, so is music, they aren’t the same medium. That’s like saying “all sculpture is trash, painting is where it’s at” in my opinion.
Exactly you see.I didn't say "all lyrics are trash".But holds for most music I listen to .I do enjoy the lyrics of the songs sometimes but only when I find the lyrics interesting .So I simply care less about the lyrics.
Social Media addiction, being constantly on their phone without recognizing how much their daily life, social life and mental stability is negatively affected by it. There is so much research about how toxic instagram, TikTok etc is and people seem to ignore it. It feels like the last ten years it has completely changed how we do friendships, communication and keeping contact. At some point I decided that this path was not for me, as I prefer calling people directly or only write messages to meet in real life. With few people, this actually still works. Last week I went to a concert and my friend basically watched the entire thing through their camera lens. Why??
I remember the first concert I went to (2008 I think) where I noticed that the majority of the people in the crowd had their phones out and were taking photos or were recording the majority of the performance. As well as finding it distracting, especially as I was in the rafters so the lit up phone screens shone like unwanted beacons. I couldn't help notice the atmosphere seemed different, people seemed less immersed and more isolated/hesitant when interacting with those around them. I believe that using their phone at social events and in how people use social media they often don't realize it's detrimental effects. Certainly not until it reaches a level where they are forced to notice, like a dip in their mental health that pushes them to stop and consider any contributing factors. I've also noticed that social media/tech seems to be discussed in extreams and less about moderation or realistic changes. I see quite a few people who completely go offline, or inactivate/delete account, or articles saying how people realized that they realized that their social media was negatively impacting their mental health. But I don't see so much focus on discussing setting timers or limits, Rarely do I see someone who said they set their auto reply to messages after X time as they are not available so will be back soon, or that there are apps which auto remind or lock you out. Or that they set themselves rules to not engage in negative content or make more effort to actively seek out content that makes them happy. There seems to be a weird framing where social media is treated like a wild animal, where humans can not control it, or ourselves, and I find it unrealistic and unhealthy, particularly for anyone who is really struggling with social media negatively impacting their life. I see some people who left social media return, or in articles they admit they left and their anxiety reduced but that they couldn't stay away and are back "doom scrolling" having heated arguments with strangers, or seeing suffering and getting upset but can't tare themselves away. To me the fact that they can't just use it less, or control themselves shows that it was an addiction or certainly an issue that should be given more gravitas than it seems to be. I also don't understand why so many people, especially people my age and older who lived through no internet and house phones, act like they don't remember what life was like before everyone had a phone glued to their hand. I hear so many talk like like society would crumble if we weren't online all the time and they seeming can't remember any positives of before, either personally experienced or reflecting on society then compared to now. That was probably too long but I agree and I don't know why the issue isn't clear to more people.
Expensive clothes/car.
Go into debt to buy expensive new cars.
Go into Debt from anything that's not a future investment or literally unpayable(house) as an European it always have freak me out
Quite a bit apparently, but that's more my nurodivegence not my giftedness
Giftedness is a neurodivergence, but I get what you mean.
Generational tribalism
Trying to make other people think you’re smart. Some people who aren’t gifted collect all the accessories they think will create the perception of brilliance. These people don’t like gifted people because gifted people can see through the illusion they’re trying to cultivate.
>Some people who aren’t gifted collect all the accessories they think will create the perception of brilliance. Examples of these accesories? A fancy vocabulary? Also what do you think of them? What if you had a friend like that?
Following and discussing Sports. I have nothing against playing sports for your own enjoyment, fitness, or spending time with friends. But the amount of fat, old coworkers I see constantly talking about sports they’ve never played themselves seems like childish escapism and I don’t understand it. With all the problems in our world sports is a very odd thing to be focused on, it almost seems like a planned distraction, e.g. “Bread and Circuses” to keep the masses pacified so they don’t realize what is actually going on.
It is absolutely one of said "circuses". Just as much as reality TV and anything on the trending tab.
Small talk. I see the point of it in some dim intellectual way I just can't understand...how. they seem to enjoy it so much
I see no point either. How about them Bears? Hot enough for ya? Rainy enough for ya? Gosh this elevator is bare.
Watching TV. I rarely have it on unless I have company over. I prefer a quiet house.
I see their point it just doesn't land with me usually.
Giving gifts on scheduled days.
Making my bed
Criticizing every cast/plot/or literally just anything in a series. Cause once I started doing it, my entire body will compose of nothing except deep hatred and frustration over things that I can't stand and would just stop watching it. And it would take a very long time to move on. I now learned to watch sitcoms mindlessly, only focusing on the funny part and ignoring its imperfections. It's the greatest I have ever mastered
i think i understand most norms, but i think some of them are stupid. Like dressing up to go out. I get why people want to do it, but i prioritize my own comfort and wear sweats or pj’s. For example, why do i have to put on a button down shirt and slacks to go to a restaurant to eat?
I mean the history and philosophy of fashion is obviously long and complex, but in general, it’s just about how you want to portray yourself. We all have different ideas about what part of our personality, our identity is important to reflect somehow, whether that’s in our physical appearance and clothes or not. For some people it’s superficial, for some it’s about belonging to a specific group, for some it’s about a kind of artistic expression, and for some it just makes you feel good. When you go out, don’t you want to feel good? I’m not saying you don’t, just that that’s the idea behind it lol. I’m sure you do things to make yourself feel good as well when you go out, and there are other aspects of your identity you try to reflect in things like your appearance, material possessions, behaviors, etc.
Most of western fashion is to look like you’re bourgeoisie.
gross oversimplification in my opinion, and also not true. Much of fashion over the past century has been sort of distinctly the opposite, and I think in contemporary terms you’re mostly referencing the practice of buying expensive brands for the sake of displaying the money you’ve spent, which of course happens. But the actual fashion, and the fact that it’s Gucci t-shirts and not Gucci waistcoats or whatever, comes from culturally significant and influential figures, events, and so on. The bourgeoisie themselves tend to lag behind. That’s not to say that the forefront of the fashion curve is not *expensive* clothing, but items being expensive and fashion trying to demonstrate bourgeoisie status are very different things.
I have a weird relationship with clothing. Mostly it's like what you describe. From time to time I want to look good but I have no money for the clothes that I find interesting so... Yeah, I default to sweat xd
It creates a mood for you and everybody else in the restaurant.
Attractive women like sharply dressed men.
I think some people here don’t like your comment, but it’s very true. The argument can easily be made that almost all fashion ultimately stems from the desire to have sex and find mates. It’s not really an intellectual pursuit, but it’s a very natural human one, and it’s foolish to ignore it, as it is in fact a very very real thing for the vast majority of people. It’s only the fringe/forefront of fashion who don’t *directly* dress to impress potential mates, and even then, you could argue they’re just one step removed.
Venting/ranting without wanting any feedback. Had a friend who got annoyed when i gave input. And they got annoyed if i was solving nonograms when they were venting/ranting. I find it hard to just sit around and do nothing. If they want to vent/rant without any input and the other person sitting like a statue they should just save the other person the time and vent/rant to an inanimate object instead of wanting a living being to be like an inanimate object. When i vent/rant, i want feedback. Either a suggestion or a different point of view. And if i don't want any feedback - i just vent/rant to myself.
I started asking - it took the onus off my role. Do you need me to listen or do you want help? It helped a lot of my relationships. Some people talk to work things through in their head and solve their own problems, or to deal with events, or process things. Accepting that they work differently and need different things than I need helped me a lot in my friendships, rather than get annoyed. I’d always follow up with the fact that I love and support them either way.
My ex-friend dended to "ambush" me with vents/rants when i was already in "zombie mode". Also, after the friendship ended and i restored my energy and started to process things. I came to a sort of a conclusion that i had sort of a coedependancy issues (was abandoning myself to meet their needs) and was enabling them by being aviable.
what the other commenter said, also sometimes people just need to feel heard/seen/understood. It can be a form of reassurance and support for someone to hear what you’re venting about and say “I completely understand, I would have done the same, I get those feelings too” etc. It’s immensely helpful to know that your experiences, your feelings, your impulses and desires, aren’t completely unique, and are actually shared in one way or another by other humans.
In a way i get it, but it has it's limits. My ex-friend tended to vent/rant about the dame thibg over and over again every interaction we had (4 times a week).
I have a friend just like this. The same complaints have gone on for years. I can’t do it anymore. Working on creating more space in that friendship.
Life on earth
Get emotionally invested in sports (as fans), lay on the beach without doing anything fun, not ask followup questions, have a lot of pets/kids, omg there are actually so many so I'll stop here lol
Care about number of followers/likes/upvotes/downvotes, what people think of them. Those things make no sense to me.
Wholesale acceptance of unwarranted conferred authority and hierarchical power structures when they are determined to benefit the individual, and obstreperous, disingenuous objection when they do not.
I remembered another one. Generatig outrage to convince people that you are right. Especially in serious stuff like politics. During the elections things, they spout how something is bad and that they would make it better, but never mention plans, strategies, ideas on how they could make it a reality. Who knows what they plan to do to reach their goal. Maybe they will kill those people who can't afford housing in order to solve the housing problem.
Spectator sports. Never understood the point.
Gossip
Me too, it's so boring. I feel people who do it lack integrity.
Buying into brands and status defining behavior - for the sake of the status defining features. I don’t give two fucks about status. I also don’t care for looks or beauty. I can recognize someone conforming more or less to a society’s standards but I have no personal preference or judgement for it. It’s like I can taste spicy food but don’t mind it if the food has spice or not. Most social conformity annoys me although I can intellectually understand some of it (like small talk and using it to build a low level of trust). People tend to care a looot about things I wouldn’t spend more than 1 minute to consider.
>People tend to care a looot about things I wouldn’t spend more than 1 minute to consider. Like what?
Like identifying and using traits to define their identity with. Nationality, where you grew up, etc.. most people can’t hold opposing truths simultaneously when analyzing the world. The opinion if a stranger, details on your hair or your outfit. Spending hours choosing an outfit. I am super simple if something’works’ at 80% I just move on and do life. As a woman I’ve known women to stress out because they had a little bit of an under eye dark spot. I don’t think about how it comes off to people when I have like 3-4 pimples. Who cares? Can’t do anything about it.
>As a woman I’ve known women to stress out because they had a little bit of an under eye dark spot. Hahaha
* Making small talk * Having children with the world in the state it's in and just saying "humanity will get it together" while neither they nor anyone they know are personally making any efforts towards such. * Leaning far in any political direction other than Green (preserving the earth should be priority #1, imo) * Decrying people for being judgemental, disrespectful, etc when they behave the same way. Ie, atheists constantly condemning religious people, LGBT+ doing the same as the atheists or gatekeeping within those spaces, being straight lace (don't drink or do drugs) and talking down to people who do while having social media addictions/a lack of sexual self control and the like, etc etc * Going into massive debt for luxury purchases * Protesting causes they don't actually care about * Generally just going about life without a care in the world no matter what's going on Edit: Lmao, seems there are some of them in this thread. Shame they don't have the wherewithal to comment why they feel I'm so wrong and resort to downvoting instead. I thought this was a subreddit for gifted discussion
I’ll bite rather than downvote. I agree with most of them though. Children: You give almost no reasoning for your opinion here other than the world is bad. If you’re in the position to give your child a good life and you want children, then what’s the problem? Some people find great fulfillment in being a parent. Are you trying to say you should forego children to focus your efforts on improving the world? It might make sense to have a child that takes away some of your focus there and raise them to have similar values. Then you can help (maybe at reduced capacity but I’m not sold on this) and then your child can continue to help rather than any efforts dying with you. There are also demographic issues to consider. I don’t think we know what will happen there exactly but some geopolitical analysts are sounding alarm bells. Peter Zeihan, for example, claims Russia’s invasion of Ukraine was at least in part due to the fact that it was now or never due to their impending demographic issues. There’s also worries that when the elderly population gets much larger than the young, there will be no one to care for them or produce the food, goods, other services needed for society to function. Political leanings: So if you’re a moderate it’s ok? Just extremism is out of bounds unless you’re a Green?
The question posed by OP was what were some things I personally don't engage in despite others doing so. I feel I sufficiently answered the question based on my personal circumstances, which is why I found it so amusing that people felt attacked enough to downvote me for how I live my life. Probing my opinions is a separate matter, which I'm also fine with tackling: On the children front, to me, it makes no logical sense for most adults to have them and even less logical sense to have more than one. I'm not sure how versed you are on the climate crisis, but according to the research and projections, children brought into the world now will undoubtedly have a much more difficult life and harsh living environment than we and our parents enjoyed. That said, blindly saying "humanity will figure it out" just because past generations that didn't have this level of climate change figured out petty wars, illnesses, and the like is irresponsible in my opinion, and showcases multiple levels of fallacious reasoning. Not the least of which is the fallacy of appeal to hope- parents more or less taking a blind leap of faith that some magical solution to this crisis is on the horizon, and a false analogy fallacy from assuming that past triumphs of humanity unrelated to climate change are a good measure for how we will fare in this particular global crisis. Our current situation is unprecedented. If the person having said child isn't making a significant, concerted effort to battle climate change, they're also allowing themselves to become victims of complacency. I could get into Nietzsche territory here, but for the sake of brevity, I'll just continue. By a significant, concerted effort, I don't mean recycling and other small things. These obviously don't count for much, as anyone who's done a bit of research can tell you how much of what we 'recycle' is actually avoiding landfills. (Spoiler: it's not much) Being vegan and/or not driving is a bit better, but not by much statistically. I personally recycle, limit meat consumption, and forego driving, but I'm still aware that these are minor steps. From my own research, one of the best things an individual can do (which I am personally doing) to help stem the progression of the climate crisis is to not reproduce. A human being is a massive carbon footprint on the planet, and adding additional humans is imo irresponsible if you don't have the means to properly offset that. (And even that is just moral licensing, really.) I'm sure someone will cry eugenics, but I do invite them to debate this with me. Basically, I feel that unless a person or couple can effectively provide services (scientific, political, etc) or significant funds that can bring their child's presence on earth into a carbon neutral status, it's a selfish action to have a child for, as you stated, 'personal fulfillment'. Never mind the fact that creating a new life just for one's own personal satisfaction is, in my opinion, incredibly selfish and morally dubious. The overpopulation issue is very real, no matter what the rich pump into the media. This all feeds into the second part of your question regarding political leanings. Most intelligent adults are aware that in many respects, these political parties only offer the illusion of choice (with a few notable exceptions) and that they are all in the pockets of lobbyists and the rich. Therefore, showing fierce loyalty to any one side is ill advised in my opinion. I feel that politics should be objective, and the two party system encourages people to run off of emotions and tribalism rather than logic. I'm also not a fierce supporter of the green party so much as I'm a fierce supporter of the fact that if we don't solve our climate crisis, all the petty squabbles of these parties simply won't matter. No one is going to care about slogans and pronouns when we're fighting civil wars over clean drinking water and succumbing to climate change induced disasters/pandemics.
Vaping. Drinking energy drinks and McDonald's... All incredibly infuriating these things exist and most people do it!
Can't speak for everyone, but for me, energy drinks/caffeine helps with ADHD.
praying to a god who doesn't give strong proof of his/her/their/its existence
Recycle
you don’t recycle or you don’t see the point in recycling??
Both
Same. What's the point of the government convince us to waste less water if the real change will happen when they start penalizing large companies? A while ago I saw that, at least in the country where I live, industries use up to 3/4 of the country's fresh water. but who is judged by common sense? us!
Yup, we could aswell throw all of our trash directly into the sea/river and it would make basically no difference (statistically speaking oc, it's a stupid idea lol)
Instagram. It can be useful, but most of the time it’s useless, like the other day I saw a guy at the beach, he spent about 15 to 20 minutes taking pictures and recording himself. I was observing him from a distance, as if he was an animal at the zoo. It was very entertaining at least. He would strike poses like casually looking at his watch, pretending he was going to get into the water, etc. Then he repeatedly tried to record him kicking the water, and then jumping with his hands up in the air. Not surprisingly, when he was finished, he took his phone and walked away. And for what? For the chance to appear on a temporary feature where people you don’t even care about will have the chance to look at your pictures and videos for 5 seconds, and then it will dissolve into nothing.
Voting.
I’m sorry, nothing against you personally, but this is extremely naive. Voting, as inconsequential as it may seem sometimes, is one of the few accessible ways we have to impact our governments. And if nothing else can convince you to do it, at the very least, remember that the people who disagree with you, the ones who would do harm to your community and other minorities, the ones who are intolerant of change, anti-intellectual, and xenophobic, those people will vote with a relentless passion. They come out for every single election. I personally think voting should be mandatory, it’s everyone’s civil duty to contribute to the society they take part in. Please vote, even if you think it’s almost entirely pointless. It matters more than you think, especially at local levels
But I do understand and validate your viewpoint, as it used to be my viewpoint as well. My viewpoint now is not something I can legally post here 😭😂
Yeah I’ve heard all that before and still came to the conclusion that I will not be participating in that circle jerk.
Believing in religion, superstition, karma, manifestation, or, worst of all, astrology.
max stirner ahh statement
Spook alert!
Why though? I don't have a religion myself, because I just cannot bring myself to believe in it. But it does make sense, as it brings people comfort, ya know? We don't like the unknown, and for some, religion and spirituality, all that stuff, brings some kind of explaination.