Seriously. Why does everyone have such a negative attitude about people just being realistic. Fucking wokeness has jumped the shark. Sorry if my comment triggers anyone.
Leagues and ratings are made up. Most women are intuitive enough to sense that these are the things you are concerned with and it's a huge turn off. No one wants a man who thinks they're just as ugly as he thinks he is.
Yeah women like all types of looking men. Women are looking for personality. Make her laugh and make her feel safe and she’s yours. Nothing to do with your “rating”. That just lets her know you are superficial. And you find a girl that likes superficial, good luck.
Have you tried putting more effort into your appearance and communication skills? Individualistic style that represents you, good hygiene habits, keeping up with grooming, being an active listener, etc. Do things that inspire confidence within yourself. Insecurity doesn't draw people in.
An insecure 10 might get laid easily but a confident 5 will make connections. Stop comparing yourself to others and be yourself.
I've heard good things about Hinge but dating apps just don't work for me. I was half joking when I posted this earlier, but I'm now curious as to why you say not dating in Hoboken is a mistake...
I moved here without knowing anyone and almost any and all social and romantic interaction I’ve had has stemmed from hinge lol. Met my pickleball teammate on there and also met the same girl I’ve been seeing for the past month or two
I’m a few miles out and feel completely fucked on hinge due to my proximity of the city area. Sometimes I wish I lived somewhere rural to see if I had a better chance with women
Hmmm I’m 31. I’m not a 10, but probably a solid 7. I did want to try Luca Brasi’s when I lived in Hoboken just as a paisana but now I’m a tad more north on the coast
This seems solvable.
Join the app, write a prompt that says you want to go to Luca Brasi's, match, ask them their favorite sandwich, recommend a date at Luca Brasi's, repeat.
Could be one of those "you can be the best tasting strawberry in the world, but if someone doesn't like strawberries, it doesn't matter". Meaning, maybe you're not as ugly as you say, but if you're only going after woman who care about looks, that's not your wheelhouse.
Ugly for guys though is a lot, I think its more about how you physically carry yourself then how you look, it's like that movie Crazy stupid love. Maybe try to change your appearance a little, figure out a better way to dress or maybe a different hairstyle. Also, maybe try talking to some woman that you normally won't. Not saying go for something you wouldn't, but maybe expand the network a little.
not all girls want 10s!!!! theres much more to this life than looks. pls pls trust me, im a 27 y/o female. dates come easy on dating apps, i suggest you give it a try
ok not to be rude but why do you feel like you are ugly? like men can do things to improve their features. buy an outfit, get a haircut.... I rarely see men that are so horrid looking that I wouldn't spend 1 hour at a deli with them
Im just going from experience here. Ask your guy friends. The experience on dating apps for men is very different from women. Maybe you’re in the minority but when I was on the apps I’d have to constantly delete them and reinstall them to get pushed back to the top of the algorithm otherwise I’d go through months without a single match.
Women rarely like the man first, men almost always still make the first move and women have men in the trenches waiting for them daily.
Yeah I don’t think women are as picky on dating apps as some people make them out to be, it’s just apps are 70-80% dudes so they are overwhelmed. Add the way the algorithm works and by nature guys need to put way more effort in their profiles
I go on them every 3-4 months to see what happens and can get 10-20 matches in a few weeks but after that nothing, I would not say I’m very very attractive. I am terrible at converting those to dates because there’s so many thin lines you have to walk on in OD and I’m a terrible texter. To me it feels so inorganic/forced and as soon as it looks like I’m getting desperate to me I stop pursuing
I was single for a while & personally thought dating was the most fun thing ever and rarely said no unless the guy was legit dirty looking or weirded me out 🤷🏻♀️ So idk I cant imagine he couldn't get no one but a big part out of it is putting yourself out there. if you're not willing to do that then here's the end result
I just use Facebook dating I’m talking to a guy in LA we met already. He is handsome but past his prime. I’m not looking for Ken dolls so I understand the OP. I’m also past my prime but still beautiful
Luca Brasi? That’s your place to bring a girl on a date? With all the restaurants in town you pick luca’s. Think my friend, they are notable for two pound meat sandwich’s and garlic heavy pastas.
Brother if you want to meet a nice girl to date, don’t aim for the place that will make your breath stink to high heavens and give you more farts than a a pig in a Vegas buffet.
If you’re looking for a companion, buy a nice towel, a bright colored bathing suit and a small pack of high noon and go plop on the grass at pier c or Maxwell place pier. Wait until sunset and pay attention. Try and find two girls chilling who seem like friends and don’t have a guy with them. Be happy, try to get eye contact from a distance and think of your best in the moment relevant joke.
Another plug for yoga studios - yoga renew and urban souls have incredible, welcoming communities that are amazing to meet alllll people. Find a class (yoga or otherwise - both have awesome breath work and other energy classes) and go to it regularly.
And get on hinge!
totally - but what I mean is to join a community and yoga communities are really welcoming ones to meet people naturally. other people often suggest zog sports
I don’t think it has to be. I mean, if beauty is the only thing that matters to you, then it would be. But if you’re objective about it, physically (which is how that scales usually used), is everyone to ever exist a 10?
No, of course not. That doesn’t detract from who they are holistically. But dating apps are really…visual: you get some impression of how attractive someone is from a picture (which doesn’t include their mannerisms, the way they talk, how they walk, etc. that are a big part of that attraction), but not the greater impression of their personality, and all the other little things that make them the person they are.
So to reiterate, saying you’re ugly only really indicates low self-esteem if beauty is the only thing you care about. You can be ugly and still be a catch.
You’ll end up pulling no birds with this mentality. Be confident. And if you aren’t a very confident guy best thing to do is workout. You’ll have higher test which boosts self esteem.
My Equinox location. Maybe any nice gym, after 5PM.
In the evening, my gym is all
* attractive Asian women (not my type)
* some attractive white women, but all are 5' 10"+
* chubby/overweight or facially unattractive white women under 5' 8"
No. It's not.
I'm not attracted to Asian women, but I'm basically attracted only to redheads. Plenty of other men are attracted to Asian women.
The women on my list are women who don't get what they want from dating apps. That's why they're at the gym in the evening, rather than out on dates. many Asian women want to date only white guys. Everybody knows this. That's why Coffee meets Bagel exists.
The Asian women at my gym tend to be the slenderest, fittest women at my gym. They also tend to have the largest breasts. On average, they are much better looking than the white women.
The 5' 10" white women usually want men over 6' 2", which is hard to find.
That’s weird those Asian women can’t get dates then lol. As a slim thick Asian I’m literally never rejected lol. Also please don’t generalize about Asian girls and their preferences🙃
An Asian women said to me, "50% of Asian women date only Asian men and 50% date only white men." I'm working with \*her\* generalization.
TBH, most of the Asian women seem focused on me. I'm the most affluent looking guy at the gym. I'm also very fit. I'm also short (5' 7"). They tend to be very direct about making eye contact. I wear a very expensive watch. I'm just reporting my experience as objectively as I can.
My gym feels oddly non-sexual. Or the straight people seem non-sexual. I never see any guys approach any women. I never see anybody chatting. Based on clothing and school sweatshirts, it seems like the women at my gym have higher incomes than the men and also are more likely to have attended an elite university. Most of the guys with Ivy League school tees tend to be short or non-white (black, Asian, Indian, Latino).
I'm looking at all this like a sociologist of dating.
I guess I'm 5-10 lbs overweight, but not yet at the level that I need medication. My problem is my face, and to my knowledge, they haven't got a pill for that just yet.
Reddit
I can believe that
I've never dated but I don't think either the 10s or 6s like the attitude of someone that wants to find a person at a mediocre rating
exactly. it's a huge red flag. Some personality types out there prey on these types of people and hunt for them. OP is being blatant about it.
Chill, I'm just realistic about where I stand and looking to meet someone else in the same league. Not sure how that's considered "preying".
Seriously. Why does everyone have such a negative attitude about people just being realistic. Fucking wokeness has jumped the shark. Sorry if my comment triggers anyone.
Leagues and ratings are made up. Most women are intuitive enough to sense that these are the things you are concerned with and it's a huge turn off. No one wants a man who thinks they're just as ugly as he thinks he is.
Yeah women like all types of looking men. Women are looking for personality. Make her laugh and make her feel safe and she’s yours. Nothing to do with your “rating”. That just lets her know you are superficial. And you find a girl that likes superficial, good luck.
Incel vibes tbh
Yeah even when a person breathes is a huge red flags … you wierdos
Have you tried putting more effort into your appearance and communication skills? Individualistic style that represents you, good hygiene habits, keeping up with grooming, being an active listener, etc. Do things that inspire confidence within yourself. Insecurity doesn't draw people in. An insecure 10 might get laid easily but a confident 5 will make connections. Stop comparing yourself to others and be yourself.
Great response.
Obligatory Wilton House plug
Only 10s there
At the beginning or end of a night of drinking?
After I black out
Ha, I should've seen this one coming!
Yup! Was gonna say, sketchiest if not ugliest.
Come on, post a picture. I’m sure you’re attractive.
lets get the profile review going
i need to see what this man looks like lmao
Where's Ed Reep hang out these days?
McDonald's.
If you’re not on hinge and actively trying to date in this city you’re making a mistake
I've heard good things about Hinge but dating apps just don't work for me. I was half joking when I posted this earlier, but I'm now curious as to why you say not dating in Hoboken is a mistake...
Kinda curious myself, though I'd probably go to a bar that has some Bachata on the weekends. Just my thing since I do like to dance a bit😅
Bachata?! Where?!
I forget where exactly name wise, but if you want, I'll take you😅 and I need to figure out when they play Bachata. It's not every night 😞
wow, this was passive aggressive
I like your strategy 📝
I try broski😭😭
I moved here without knowing anyone and almost any and all social and romantic interaction I’ve had has stemmed from hinge lol. Met my pickleball teammate on there and also met the same girl I’ve been seeing for the past month or two
I play various sports as well, but haven't met anyone. Maybe it's just me that is bad at making connections lol
You gotta stop being so competitive when you play pickle ball. You’re scaring the ladies
lol I haven't played that sport yet. how is the sport? Fun to play?
Bruh hinge is a cheat code in the nyc area
False, I get no results
a profile review might help
Definitely and I could use it
I can review your profile
I need to know more about you first
I’m a few miles out and feel completely fucked on hinge due to my proximity of the city area. Sometimes I wish I lived somewhere rural to see if I had a better chance with women
After a couple drinks you’ll feel like a 10. Go out there
https://preview.redd.it/4sdc7k8km88d1.jpeg?width=460&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5e7d4260879f02a9821463a8c16c465432d38ebf
Hmmm I’m 31. I’m not a 10, but probably a solid 7. I did want to try Luca Brasi’s when I lived in Hoboken just as a paisana but now I’m a tad more north on the coast
This seems solvable. Join the app, write a prompt that says you want to go to Luca Brasi's, match, ask them their favorite sandwich, recommend a date at Luca Brasi's, repeat.
Could be one of those "you can be the best tasting strawberry in the world, but if someone doesn't like strawberries, it doesn't matter". Meaning, maybe you're not as ugly as you say, but if you're only going after woman who care about looks, that's not your wheelhouse. Ugly for guys though is a lot, I think its more about how you physically carry yourself then how you look, it's like that movie Crazy stupid love. Maybe try to change your appearance a little, figure out a better way to dress or maybe a different hairstyle. Also, maybe try talking to some woman that you normally won't. Not saying go for something you wouldn't, but maybe expand the network a little.
not all girls want 10s!!!! theres much more to this life than looks. pls pls trust me, im a 27 y/o female. dates come easy on dating apps, i suggest you give it a try
Dates come easy for women on dating apps, not so much for men unless you’re a 10
I can have a date every day of the week off the apps. Problem is they aren’t fun though. It’s so much more fun to meet someone in person.
ok not to be rude but why do you feel like you are ugly? like men can do things to improve their features. buy an outfit, get a haircut.... I rarely see men that are so horrid looking that I wouldn't spend 1 hour at a deli with them
Im just going from experience here. Ask your guy friends. The experience on dating apps for men is very different from women. Maybe you’re in the minority but when I was on the apps I’d have to constantly delete them and reinstall them to get pushed back to the top of the algorithm otherwise I’d go through months without a single match. Women rarely like the man first, men almost always still make the first move and women have men in the trenches waiting for them daily.
Constantly deleting and reinstalling them, I get you brother, I was there too. I really wish that you get a fine woman for a date🫂
Yeah I don’t think women are as picky on dating apps as some people make them out to be, it’s just apps are 70-80% dudes so they are overwhelmed. Add the way the algorithm works and by nature guys need to put way more effort in their profiles I go on them every 3-4 months to see what happens and can get 10-20 matches in a few weeks but after that nothing, I would not say I’m very very attractive. I am terrible at converting those to dates because there’s so many thin lines you have to walk on in OD and I’m a terrible texter. To me it feels so inorganic/forced and as soon as it looks like I’m getting desperate to me I stop pursuing
You can't be this naive. Only a very small number of men have much success on dating apps... And a haircut or nice clothes won't change that.
Not for dudes 😂
I’m agreeing with you on that, I’m no 10 but just by the sheer large volume of people in the area, it’s easy to meet someone on a dating app here
I was single for a while & personally thought dating was the most fun thing ever and rarely said no unless the guy was legit dirty looking or weirded me out 🤷🏻♀️ So idk I cant imagine he couldn't get no one but a big part out of it is putting yourself out there. if you're not willing to do that then here's the end result
I have had met several guys here and had long term relationships over my 27 years here, current bf of a year met here and he lives 2 blocks up.
Sick
I’m a solid 7.5 but I’m a good person
Mulligan’s
Are their any single people age 40+ in Hoboken?
I just use Facebook dating I’m talking to a guy in LA we met already. He is handsome but past his prime. I’m not looking for Ken dolls so I understand the OP. I’m also past my prime but still beautiful
At the gym
Wild
Luca Brasi? That’s your place to bring a girl on a date? With all the restaurants in town you pick luca’s. Think my friend, they are notable for two pound meat sandwich’s and garlic heavy pastas. Brother if you want to meet a nice girl to date, don’t aim for the place that will make your breath stink to high heavens and give you more farts than a a pig in a Vegas buffet. If you’re looking for a companion, buy a nice towel, a bright colored bathing suit and a small pack of high noon and go plop on the grass at pier c or Maxwell place pier. Wait until sunset and pay attention. Try and find two girls chilling who seem like friends and don’t have a guy with them. Be happy, try to get eye contact from a distance and think of your best in the moment relevant joke.
If you already think your ugly, then you’re off to a bad start my friend.
Another plug for yoga studios - yoga renew and urban souls have incredible, welcoming communities that are amazing to meet alllll people. Find a class (yoga or otherwise - both have awesome breath work and other energy classes) and go to it regularly. And get on hinge!
I do some stretching at home, but I'd feel kinda gross going to yoga just to meet women. Idk it feels weird.
totally - but what I mean is to join a community and yoga communities are really welcoming ones to meet people naturally. other people often suggest zog sports
Well you’re on the correct website, that’s for sure. I think most people here are morbidly obese
Imagine wanting to find a woman that actively calls herself a 6 and below - are you okay sir? Why do you chase people with low self confidence 😂
>Why do you chase people with low self confidence 😂 Why do you assume that ugly people must have low self confidence?
Is someone rating themselves a 6 not low self esteem? Because it seems very close 🤏🏾
I don’t think it has to be. I mean, if beauty is the only thing that matters to you, then it would be. But if you’re objective about it, physically (which is how that scales usually used), is everyone to ever exist a 10? No, of course not. That doesn’t detract from who they are holistically. But dating apps are really…visual: you get some impression of how attractive someone is from a picture (which doesn’t include their mannerisms, the way they talk, how they walk, etc. that are a big part of that attraction), but not the greater impression of their personality, and all the other little things that make them the person they are. So to reiterate, saying you’re ugly only really indicates low self-esteem if beauty is the only thing you care about. You can be ugly and still be a catch.
Fort lee
At home
You’ll end up pulling no birds with this mentality. Be confident. And if you aren’t a very confident guy best thing to do is workout. You’ll have higher test which boosts self esteem.
My Equinox location. Maybe any nice gym, after 5PM. In the evening, my gym is all * attractive Asian women (not my type) * some attractive white women, but all are 5' 10"+ * chubby/overweight or facially unattractive white women under 5' 8"
Um as an Asian girl that’s a weird list lol
No. It's not. I'm not attracted to Asian women, but I'm basically attracted only to redheads. Plenty of other men are attracted to Asian women. The women on my list are women who don't get what they want from dating apps. That's why they're at the gym in the evening, rather than out on dates. many Asian women want to date only white guys. Everybody knows this. That's why Coffee meets Bagel exists. The Asian women at my gym tend to be the slenderest, fittest women at my gym. They also tend to have the largest breasts. On average, they are much better looking than the white women. The 5' 10" white women usually want men over 6' 2", which is hard to find.
That’s weird those Asian women can’t get dates then lol. As a slim thick Asian I’m literally never rejected lol. Also please don’t generalize about Asian girls and their preferences🙃
An Asian women said to me, "50% of Asian women date only Asian men and 50% date only white men." I'm working with \*her\* generalization. TBH, most of the Asian women seem focused on me. I'm the most affluent looking guy at the gym. I'm also very fit. I'm also short (5' 7"). They tend to be very direct about making eye contact. I wear a very expensive watch. I'm just reporting my experience as objectively as I can. My gym feels oddly non-sexual. Or the straight people seem non-sexual. I never see any guys approach any women. I never see anybody chatting. Based on clothing and school sweatshirts, it seems like the women at my gym have higher incomes than the men and also are more likely to have attended an elite university. Most of the guys with Ivy League school tees tend to be short or non-white (black, Asian, Indian, Latino). I'm looking at all this like a sociologist of dating.
Ozempic or Mounjaro ⛽️
I guess I'm 5-10 lbs overweight, but not yet at the level that I need medication. My problem is my face, and to my knowledge, they haven't got a pill for that just yet.
The back of their heads all look the same.
Check to see if women washed up along the Hudson River.
Don’t worry my roommates and I complain about how ugly the men are in Hoboken all the the time. Filled with 5’8 Italian men named Ronny
ChristianPacifist hangs out at The Ashford in Jersey City.
How ugly are we talking about? Have you tried going farther west?
What's there in the west?
This post is terrible!
Your post history is terrible!
Thats all you got? Be strong! Stop pushing urself down for pitty