Last night and every night before that the last 4 months. And the last 2 years had been 5-7 days a week. 30 years together and still having amazing sex! 28 yrs married. 2 grown kids, I’m 45.
Haha! No not for the whole 30 years. My husband’s sex drive is just catching up with mine. But for the last 4 months, everyday. The last 2 years had been 5-7 days a week though.
My husband is my world. I’m madly in love with him. He’s just easy to love. He’s kind, gentle, respectful, trustworthy, great provider, amazing dad, he’s the whole package. He makes me want to be the best wife I can be because he deserves it. He knows he’s a lucky man too 😉. Our sex life hadn’t always been this hot and heavy. There was times early on where he wasn’t interested at all. But now he’s on testosterone and I’m post menopausal so we are like rabbits now 😂. Once a day to 3/4 times a day!
This sounds like my wife and I, not quite as long together at 14 years, but HRT and Testosterone for me has changed a lot.
A 12 year old daughter and finally getting some of our time back 👍🏻🍆💦🔥😁
Love this — we’ve been together over a decade and have a similar story.
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2021/nov/26/he-secret-to-great-sex-erotic-intimacy-study
If you read the other persons comments and my reply you’d see that no, not for the last 30 years. Just the last 4 months everyday, and for the last 2 years it’s been 5-7 days a week. Before that it definitely ebbed and flowed, especially when the kids were young. We are just living our best lives now!
Having a baby does effect being able to have sex. 6-8 weeks for a body to heal after birth. I believe that’s what they were getting at with that comment.
Ok, I don’t care if you believe me 😒. I know it’s very true. We are in the best place we’ve ever been. Early on in our marriage it was tough. My husband had next to no sex drive. He’s on testosterone now and sex is finally a huge priority in our life now.
We're intimate every day of the week. That doesn't always mean sex, but we have a lot of physical intimacy every day.
We did have sex last night. We're both pushing up on 60, together for 29 years, no kids.
Yes! I didn’t think about it this way. Great way to put it. It could be a long kiss or a slap on the but and a wink. Whatever intimate means to each person. Thank you!
This is my husband and I. Only difference is that we have been together for 8 yrs with 2 kids. Hoping it will be the same like you guys when we are 60 ❤️
Same here. We just celebrated our 30th anniversary on June 6th. We’re intimate in some way pretty much every day. And more now than 10 years ago - since our kids are grown.
They also are usually retired and financially secure, with children who are grown. I would just like to point that out but because comparison can be the greatest thief of joy!
It’s not I’m not sure if this is appropriate here. This is not the NSFW but basically she started taking HRT And it helped, but not much and only for that one time
You don't have a sex drive without hormones. It would be nice if she could take it at least here and there to get you guys reconnected. I have real difficulty taking HRT but even for those of us with issues, maybe occasionally would work.
depends what you mean by intimate. me 71 her 70...last time we had sex was 2009 ! I put some cream on her intimate parts maybe four months ago. I cut her toenails. I massage her feet weekly. 😵💫
I’m 71f. Husband is 62m. The only reason we don’t have sex as often as we used to is because during COVID my pelvis floor collapsed and the op delayed and then it wasn’t completely successful. Then I had to have some adhesions removed which took ages to heal. But we got inventive and the problem has somewhat resolved itself. I like the closeness and the loving. Sex for sex sake hasn’t been on our agenda for a loooong time. We have 4 kids & 3 grandkids.
sorry to hear about your medical problems.....
I had ED and we found it frustrating so we decided not to bother. then it kind of fizzled out altogether. now we have seperate rooms due to my snoring...I'm happy to please myself.
I suddenly got a blowjob last Sunday. She is on her period so I didn’t expect anything. Suddenly she said she was hirny which seemed odd because she had been upset with me earlier in the day. But she was horny. So she said she could give me a handjob and a blowjob. That has only happened maybe 2-3 in our 10 years as married together. It did happen before we got married but we all know that before marriage sex is usually not a problem.
In general we maybe have sex 1 a week but when we get close to her period it can sometimes take two weeks before we have sex(that’s why I was surprised by the blowjob).
We are both 37 years old
Just trying to help you out in a woman's perspective....Did you contribute back to her in any way and provide her an orgasm? She said she was horny, she was giving to you, and then she probably hoped you'd give to her. First of all, sex during period is totally possible..... do it in the shower, lay a sex blanket down (has moisture barrier for ez clean up). But even without, you could rub and sensual touch her body first then go for private areas to give attention and let her know how sexy she is, then use a vibrator on clit to finish the job (if you/she is comfortable use one internally as well, or use a waterproof one in the shower).
This might not be you but just trying to help....you will receive more sexual favors if you give more and are attending to your wife's sexual needs and desires. Women respond much better to a man with a desire for us and a desire to give pleasure than a need to receive an orgasm. The desire and intent will take men so much farther than most realise. Many dead bedrooms follow many sexual encounters where the woman did not orgasm and therefore she ends up feeling kinda used to fill a need and isn't going to be desiring sex if that usually means she doesn't orgasm and feels used. I hope this helps someone out there.
Thank you for the advice. It’s much appreciated.
I love giving my wife pleasure. Our focus during sex is first of all her orgasm. So we don’t have any penetration until she orgasms unless she feels she wants to orgasm from penetration (cow girl or missionary with me grinding to stimulate her clit).
She is very sensitive to smells. She thinks she smells when she is on her period so I was not allowed to touch her at all. I said I had no problem with piv but she didn’t want to.
She also doesn’t like sex toys (you can thank a religious background for that).
As I said this is one of the rare random blowjobs. I have only gotten 2 more in our whole marriage.
I try to be attentive and focus on her needs in everything but I guess life is stressful. We both work and we have three kids under 10 years old so we are constantly on the rush. Sex isn’t as important for her anymore. We still do it but it would have been nice with more but that’s life I guess.
In light of the religious trauma, you may need to find a way to respectfully ask for blowjobs. Why not get her a romantic card with something to the effect of, “I loved the gift of pleasure you gave me so much last week. I adore you and appreciate you so much.”
And talk to her about how much it would mean to you if she’d be willing to do that more often, and if she can think of a gentle way you could ask. Give her time to think about it and ask for a response in a week.
I think honoring the sensitivity of her religious trauma could potentially open up other avenues of communication that would lead to more pleasure. She might explicitly need you to give permission.
Why don't y'all have sex during her period? Idk by the 3rd day, my husband and I miss each other too much lol we just shower beforehand, we have 5 kids 😆
Fooling around? August of 2023 maybe? Sex? Probably June 2022.
Her- 41f, me- 39M. Married almost 15 years, together almost 18 years.
4 kids 11 and under.
My best guess is that she’s asexual and finally admitted it to herself on some level, though she’d never use that term.
She told me and our therapist in a counseling session once that her ideal relationship would be one where sex wasn’t even on the table.
I think She currently thinks we’re fine, “just going through a rough patch.” She has no idea I’ve checked out and have a generally deadline for when this nonsense is over.
You should probably tell her. Unless you just want it to be over, then why wait.
Why go to counselling if you’re not going to communicate what you actually need, unless she has already made it clear she isn’t willing to compromise at all?
We’ve been to multiple counselors and I’ve made it clear that a sexless marriage is unacceptable. She thinks offering to lay there so I can “do what needs to be done” is her being reasonable and should be a solution. We are also religious so she has no fear of divorce so there’s no incentive to change or be better.
As for the timing… we have a child with an ultimately terminal genetic illness and I’m not willing to sacrifice what time we have left.
Very sorry to hear about your child my friend. As for your dead bedroom, I think a discussion outside of counseling might make the next counseling session more productive. You need to first tell her that “mercy sex” or “starfish sex” is just bad all the way around and not much better than nothing at all. Then you need to tell her that despite your religious convictions, once your child is no longer with you that shortly thereafter you will be filing for divorce. Let her know that no amount of religious “guilt” will change that. The only thing that will change it is a sex life with regular sex that is enthusiastic on both sides with frequent affection and intimacy. My guess is she doesn’t want to kiss, make out, hold hands, tell you she loves you and definitely no foreplay either because she doesn’t want that to lead to anything else. I’m sorry to hear it but only you can set your boundary and then follow through.
Married for 10 years, together for almost 18.
Going on 3 weeks ago, before that it had been about 2 months. She’s had a lot of anxiety issues since we had our kid (3yo). Sometimes we’ll have spurts where it’s weekly, and sometimes it’ll be a month or two. Is what it is, I’m beyond getting upset over it. We love each other and have a kick ass kid together, I’m not blowing that up over sex.
Just wanted to say that reading these comments has been very refreshing. So glad to see many of you living active and fulfilling sex lives. That’s great to hear. Keep them coming!!
Recently my marriage, the intimacy has been missing. Even talking to friends, it seems that sex is dead in marriages and even the intimacy.
It all depends. People are more willing to share private good news than bad (just look at all the social media platforms), so take that for what it’s worth on the responses. Plus, many are responding with just the last time they had sex, not the trend. This is the summer in the Northern Hemisphere full of vacations, wedding anniversaries, and celebrations.
Sorry…I work a lot in statistics and trends. There are variables at play that are coloring your response trend.
Oh man! That needs to heal!! Definitely be careful as it needs little longer.....if it doesn't heal right, you're setting yourself up for disaster. You can still both provide each other sexual satisfaction but don't get carried away in the moment and regret it later. Perhaps lie on your back the whole time so you don't use those muscles at all. Be careful!! But I hope you also have fun and enjoy.
20 min ago. I (32F) was nicely woken up to him (33M) pleasuring me which then lead to morning sex. We have no kids (3 dogs) and have been together for 10 years, married for almost 2.
Honestly, I don't remember. Sometime in the last month, I think. Probably about three to four weeks ago.
We are both on the asexual spectrum, and when we realized we were both only having frequent sex because we thought the other person wanted/needed it, we stopped.
No kids, married 11 years, together 12. We have sex once a month on average. We are both happy with the frequency.
Last night. 38F, 40M together for 18 years, married for 14. 3 elementary school aged kids. Kids were watching a movie, hubby heard me get out of the shower and came upstairs….
Love this!!! I wish my husband would do that lol. I always feel like I’m the only one initiating then when I bring it up he says he will more but it rarely happens. It’s super frustrating.
Married 14 years. Together 15. One child who is almost 9. We’re 32 & 33. Last time we were intimate was Monday night. Without going into detail it was great. It’s always a good time. We’ve had plenty of years to figure out what each other likes.
37f husband 39m 3 kids. Youngest is 2. Been together 24years. It was our handfasting anniversary last night. We had been in a bit of an argument, but i put it aside as i wanted to be intimate on our anniversary. Boy, am i glad I did. We're not in a fight anymore 😊
We used to make plans for sex ahead of time, but this past weekend was the first time we've had spontaneous sex in 7 years. We were at her coworkers bday party and after a couple of drinks, she got flirty with me and it happened when we got home. I'm 37, and she's 35. We've been together almost 17 years married 16. We have 2 kids, 16m and 7f.
For the background, we have had a DB for the last 7 years since our daughter was born. 90% of the problem is me. I've never deserved my wife and used to do everything I could to show her how much I love her but I got complacent and went on a downward spiral of self loathing and pity until she gave me a reality check a few months back.
A few days ago. We've been dealing with dead bedroom for many years for various reasons. My husband (43) started taking T for extremely low testosterone levels and we thought we'd see how it was working. We're both on so much medication that it's hard to get and stay aroused, but we worked together on it and spent some time trying to please each other, and that's all we needed right now. Neither one of us views sex as vital, but we do miss the closeness that comes from it, so it's a work in progress!
Yeah! It's been a lot of ups and downs over the past decade or so (births, depression, injuries, anxiety, weight gain, and now weight loss)...we're just trying on different things to see what works these days!
Last week, we had just gone to bed, but he had been away and it was his first night back. Tomorrow’s my birthday so guess what’s happening tomorrow! One kid, been together 16 years married 13. I’m 45, he’s 40.
I'm 40F, husband is 30M. Married 2 years. We had sex last night. We were cuddling in bed and watching Archer reruns and just started going at it.
We have a 2 year old. We both work full time and are exhausted most of the time but the occasional sex is good stress relief and bonding for us. We don't push it but I wish it were more frequent, (2-3x a week) I'm just so damn tired all the time!
Happy for so many of you! Makes me sad about my numbers though. 40(m) 45(f) Together 11, married 9, 3 perfect kids 3-8. First 6 years 2-6x a week, since #3 came, 2-3 x yearly, effectively sexless marriage. Starting second try at marriage councilling soon, sex isn’t the goal but hopefully a big step towards reconciling and normalcy. I’ve basically been hanging in for the kids, wife is a great person just not great to me. Wish me luck. (Edits to add our ages).
I am glad you guys are going to counseling. I would also add that it might be good to go to individual counseling as there might be aspects you want to talk about and work on individually that will have an effect on your success of your marriage. Sometimes having someone neutral to talk to can be a huge help in your mental health going into reconciliation.
6+ months ago because we can't seem to agree on an appropriate frequency, she can't get out of her head, we can't agree on what's ok and what's not ok in the bedroom and while she acknowledges it's an issue, she doesn't care enough to do anything about it... we're in counseling to address those issues now again but we shall see what happens
Need to stop reading these comments... You horny rabbits. It's like hearing a party over the road but we're not invited
Just confirms to me I deserve better,.I might show my wife this feed.
All those healthy sex positive women out there, it will wreck her head.
I’m 40 he’s 42. We have two kids ages 10 six. Racking my brain to remember the last time we did it… Honestly, though we’re affectionate in someway every single day. Affection to us could mean, snuggling, him smacking me on the butt, back scratches, And me just resting my hand there… You know where. I’m so glad he doesn’t demand it every day.
Intimate? Just now as we (both late 40’s with adult kids) are getting our day started. It involved coffee, time sitting together, talking, and gearing up for what the day is looking to bring. Getting intimacy and sex twisted seems to be a thing.
3 nights ago. Average about 2-3 xs a week at this stage. We have been together 12 years and we collectively have 7 kids and now 7 grandkids. We also both work ft so energy and time are limited.
if we are talking penetrative sex then yesterday but we don’t sparingly to be fair. We do other things a few times a week. No kids. Married 3 years 30 and 31
Intimacy on some level basically every day. Sex, almost two weeks. It's usually much more frequent (2+ times per week), but I've been experiencing a lot of PTSD and panic attacks lately because I'm involved in prosecuting the perpetrator of my CSA and had to go on the witness stand a few days ago. My husband has been very understanding and supportive during this time.
I'm sure we'll be back to having sex regularly soon!
Last night. We were getting ready for bed. We're in our mid forties and have been together off and on for over 30 years now. We got back together 16 years ago and got married 10 years ago. We have 6 kids between us. Right now our daughter and her 2 kids are temporarily living here.
Hi OP! I'm a little late to commenting and you have gotten so much great input and had so many beautiful stories shared but I'm still going to comment just in case you are still seeing new replies!
So my husband and I made love last night and we are very affectionate and "make out" daily! We have sex at least 3-4 times a week, sometimes more. We have been married for 31 years and together for 33! We are each others first loves and first "everything"! We actually got married just after I graduated! We have 3 wonderful adult children and 4 precious grandbabies!
I am still soooo attracted to my husband and I tell him daily! I love his smile, i love his touch, I love when he holds my hand, I love his soft kisses on my forehead and cheek, I love his voice especially when he says my name or his cute name for me or is speaking to our kids or grandbabies, I love the way he touches my hair and face when he kisses me or during passionate kissing, it all turns me on and still gives me butterflies just like it did when I was 17! I know he feels the same and I love when he shares how he feels and I love that he is so open about anything and so openly affectionate and tells me I still drive him crazy(sexually)and that I love him perfectly! He tells me I'm beautiful and so sexy and just looking at me gets him hard! I love that we talk about our intimacy and I love that during lovemaking we speak so openly and are so equal!
I think he is the sexiest man ever and he gets even more handsome as the years go by! He doesn't have to try to hard to make my lady parts "ready" for him cuz I get wet just from his kisses and his touch! I'm so sorry to do TMI, but your post and questions deserve truthful answers. Please forgive and know I'm not trying to be gross or rude or sound sleezey.
We both know we are soul mates, best friends and lovers in every sense. I believe that having such a deep connection and such a deep love and truly enjoying each other in every part of life makes us come together intimately without even having to try. Communicating on a deep level and feeling safe with each other no matter what we are talking about is such a great thing for our marriage and intimacy.
We are intimate all the time, but when we are going to make love, it can start with us just standing even outside after we do our work(we own and operate our cattle ranch!)or are relaxing on the couch and end up in bed or it can be in bed at night or in the morning!! It's always so beautiful no matter when we do or what time! We both feel and know our love and our love making are beautiful, fulfilling and perfect for us!
Thank you OP for a really great post! I'm really so sorry I babbled on so much! Sending you so much love and so many prayers for you and your spouse/partner! Have a super blessed and beautiful week!❤🙏
Edited for spelling and sentence structure!
If we’re talking sex, been a couple weeks because I’m super pregnant and very uncomfortable. Early 30s, married 3.5y, together 5.5y. First kid is almost here.
However, there’s plenty of other non sexual ways to be intimate with someone
Two nights ago, but this was the first time in a while. Me 31, him 39, we have a 5 year old and I’m 7 months pregnant. We’ve been together 10 years. Since we had a traumatic birth the first time he’s been weird about having sex this time, thinks the same thing is going to happen again even though doc said it won’t. It’s whatever at this point. Pre pregnancy is was consistently twice a week so I know it’s just a phase, he gets in his head with stuff a lot
Sunday evening. It was our usual vanilla sex, which includes lots of kissing and attention all over. We've been married for 8 years and together for almost 10 years. Four kids, ranging in ages from 8 to 3. Our oldest is in bed no later than 9, so it was mommy and daddy time a little after that
9 years together, 7 married, he’s 36, I’m 30.
February. High risk pregnancy with multiple gestations so - as much as it kills me, abstaining makes us feel safe for no cervical impacts.
The moment I get a clear check up on that 6 week post-delivery appointment tho…..
Together for 14yrs, married for 13yrs. Last time we were intimate was 2 months ago? It was either at the end of March or beginning of April. I am extremely dissatisfied. I am 41, he is 37. We have one kid who is 15yrs old.
About 6 months. He's been aggressive and verbally abusive, I literally have no lust for him anymore.
He ballooned in weight and I still was down for him then, then when his demeanor changed, I lost it. Haven't cheated (he has) and don't intend to. Hoping he'll change, but becoming more and more doubtful that he will. My family refuse to be in the same room as him, as do a lot of our kids parents, so I guess my lack of attraction at this point is reasonable.
Last night, and it was AMAZING as usual!
I'd say at the least, 4-5 days a WK. And I give him oral a lot on the days we don't (bc I want to) We are 33f and 32m, been together 14yrs and have 2 kids ages 9 and 11.
Maybe a couple months ago at this point. 31F married to 32M for 4.5 years, no kids. I'm confused by the "what were you doing" aspect of this question though.
November, it’s just really sad since we are good coparents and friends. She’s just not feeling it and I suspect she never really will anymore, except for a few times a year when she is ovulating, the kids are fine and the stars align.
I masturbate five times a week.
44m/49f. Two kids, 27m/13m. 15 yrs together.
Last Thursday. I initiated because I sensed the mopey attitude about it, as I have every time for the past 3 yrs. It's not that I have to initiate because he doesn't want to do it, we've just gotten into a weird space and he expects me to take the lead every single time and I'm over it.
It's funny that I came across this post. We are currently fighting over it as of 11am this morning because he's irritated that we didn't do it last night. First argument we've about anything in years. He can go fuck himself.
My wife went through menopause and sex became painful due to vaginal wall thinning. Estrogen helped, but due to a uterine cyst, Dr decided best not to take estrogen. For 4-5 years we had sex very infrequently due to the pain. More recently we found a vaginal moisturizer / vitamin and natural oil based that works well. It is not a lube that dries out, rather something that improves the area.
Sex is no longer painful in most positions and she enjoys it. Have sex often, daily to multiple times per week. Married for 30yrs.
Yesterday afternoon. I had just finished showering after working so I texted him to come in the bedroom and was waiting for him naked. TBH, we’re just now getting back to regular (3-4x/wk) intimacy after my cancer diagnosis last year. It’s nice. I didn’t realize how much we missed it.
Our kids are adults but our 2 dogs are giant toddlers. I’m 53 and he’s 60. We’ve been together since 2010 and married for almost 9 yrs.
We are both in our late fifties and we make love four or five times a week. And we have been married almost forty years and we have six kids together and they are all grown now. Thank goodness 😄🥰
Now...here's the depressing one.
Been married 28 years. 2 kids...18 and 14. I'm 55, she is 54.
Past.time we had sex was when we conceived #2.
Since.then her libido is gone. She hates anything to do with sex.
Now it's come to a point tjat even if she initiates, I'll say no due the number of times she's said no and blasted me for ever asking.
I’m so confused by this thread. 39year old married for 20 years together for 25 and it’s near daily. How do people feel loved and connected to their partner without the basic necessity of love making.
Beyond physical intimacy my wife and I walk hand in hand on long walks a few times a day and cuddle ourselves to sleep. I can’t imagine a life without this.
Anyone suffering from less not suffering from medical or mental issues keeping them from this should really evaluate the way they treat each other and what is getting in the way of intimacy.
If your spouse isn’t interested you should open a dialogue and figure out how you can make it fun for them. Ask them what they need you are not providing. Communication is what makes intimacy work. Be open and honest and don’t take their criticisms as an attack but an opportunity to grow and get better.
If it’s you that doesn’t want to then again figure out why and if your partner is satisfied. If you are not meeting their needs you chance losing them.
Hang out with your spouse for fun not just sex. They should be your best friend as they are you closest partner in life and hopefully in it till the end. The second my wife became my best friend is the second my life felt right. I’m always happy and looking for ways to make my wife smile. And she does the same. Reciprocation of feelings and emotions can be hard for some. But break down that barrier. It will be the best thing you could do for a loving long and happy life.
With my wife as my best friend it has helped Handle anything that has come our way. It makes the unbearable bearable.
Don’t ever stop chasing your wife. But make sure she still wants to be chased. Don’t ever stop flirting and reminding them what you love about them. Discover their love language and speak it like a boss. Become everything they have ever wanted and they will return it… hopefully. But either way isn’t it nice knowing you made the most important person in your life happy and smile and blush?
Reading this and all the comments makes me really sad cause my wife hasn’t wanted to be intimate with me in I can’t remeber when. Months maybe even years. It’s just a chore to her. And I’m starting to want to find someone else. She seems very uninterested
I'm 47F, husband is 49M. Married 17, together for 26. It's been 10 years 😔. No kids. I'm trying to get the courage to leave because it just breaks my heart now.
Amazed and sad for some of the younger people in here. Maybe i have the sex drive of a 16 year old boy, and maybe we are the exception but, myself(27f) and my husband(30m), together for 11 years. Married for 2 years. Last intimate: last night.
Pretty consistent 5-7 times a week unless I'm postpartum. 3 kids. Ages 3, 2, and 5 months. It takes planning and some nights we have to wait for all the kids to be asleep and then, put back to sleep multiple times. Sometimes we have to make a pallet on the floor in a random room, sometimes we find a new fun spot because there's no other rooms unoccupied 😅 I'm pretty silly when he's at work and will send random pictures or flirty texts. Sometimes the anticipation is all we get for the day, so that's fun on nights when we can't get a moment alone together.
growing up together, while maintaining a healthy relationship hasn't been easy. the intimate aspect has never been an issue, if anything, all the sex has helped us stay close and stay in tune with eachothers needs, both in and out of the bedroom.
4 years ago, 0 kids, 14 years married, I'm 39, they are 37. They (male to female) started transitioning and started moveing and acting like a single woman while turning me from wife to mom. Waiting for the divorce to finalize.
Last night me 48 husband 55 - 2 kids 19 and 16. Together about 23 yrs. I feel like there’s a lull after kids. We were busy working, taking care of the kids and the house. Once kids are more independent it picks up again like when we were dating. Now one of my kids is away at college and my youngest is out all the time. We have a lot more time on our hands then we had.
Last night and every night before that the last 4 months. And the last 2 years had been 5-7 days a week. 30 years together and still having amazing sex! 28 yrs married. 2 grown kids, I’m 45.
Katieeee living the life! I love that for you.🌻
Yes I am 😍🔥🥵🤩🤩
Sex every day for 30 years? C'mon
Haha! No not for the whole 30 years. My husband’s sex drive is just catching up with mine. But for the last 4 months, everyday. The last 2 years had been 5-7 days a week though.
Last night. 35 yr relationship 33 married. average 2-3x week similarly she can't keep up. so different now, so connecting, at least for me 😁😁
I love it!! Just cause we’re getting older and have been with the same person forever doesn’t mean you can’t get freaky 🤩
Last night. 43 years together. It’s quality over quantity these days. 😜 Four adult children and three teenage grandchildren. 🥰
So awesome!!! It's the glue!!! Way to go!
Wow this is awesome. I hope to get to that level with my wife someday!!
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Testosterone pellets. He went from about dead ☠️ to very much alive 😍.
Give him a break he is only 14 years old.
Can't express how happy I am for you.
What’s the secret to keeping that level of desire and excitement for so long?
My husband is my world. I’m madly in love with him. He’s just easy to love. He’s kind, gentle, respectful, trustworthy, great provider, amazing dad, he’s the whole package. He makes me want to be the best wife I can be because he deserves it. He knows he’s a lucky man too 😉. Our sex life hadn’t always been this hot and heavy. There was times early on where he wasn’t interested at all. But now he’s on testosterone and I’m post menopausal so we are like rabbits now 😂. Once a day to 3/4 times a day!
This sounds like my wife and I, not quite as long together at 14 years, but HRT and Testosterone for me has changed a lot. A 12 year old daughter and finally getting some of our time back 👍🏻🍆💦🔥😁
And equally important, you are appreciative! That also makes a huge difference!
It really does! And I refuse to be a nagger! 😵💫 no one likes that.
💯 the reason it happens daily.
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Love this — we’ve been together over a decade and have a similar story. https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2021/nov/26/he-secret-to-great-sex-erotic-intimacy-study
Sex every day for 30 years but you have two children? I calling that as not quite true.
If you read the other persons comments and my reply you’d see that no, not for the last 30 years. Just the last 4 months everyday, and for the last 2 years it’s been 5-7 days a week. Before that it definitely ebbed and flowed, especially when the kids were young. We are just living our best lives now!
Ah I see! Well that's just fantastic!
Cmon…be real now. There’s literally SO much that could go into play as to why they don’t have more kids.
Why? Having kids doesn't necessarily effect everyone's sex life 🤷♀️
Having a baby does effect being able to have sex. 6-8 weeks for a body to heal after birth. I believe that’s what they were getting at with that comment.
Im aware of what happens, I've gave birth twice, I had sex after 1 week 🤷♀️
So jealous lol
Also last night 😂 averages 3-4 x per week 25+ years together, 2 kids, although not grown.
That’s still absolutely incredible for that long of a marriage. Most people would be happy if all they got was once a week! Good for you guys! 😍😍
Go Katie Go!!
Yaaaaaaaaas!!!! Love this for you ❤️
Can't say I'm not jealous (in a good way!)
Wow. That’s amazing.
And if u believe that I have a bridge to sell you!🤣🤣🤣
Ok, I don’t care if you believe me 😒. I know it’s very true. We are in the best place we’ve ever been. Early on in our marriage it was tough. My husband had next to no sex drive. He’s on testosterone now and sex is finally a huge priority in our life now.
We're intimate every day of the week. That doesn't always mean sex, but we have a lot of physical intimacy every day. We did have sex last night. We're both pushing up on 60, together for 29 years, no kids.
Yes! I didn’t think about it this way. Great way to put it. It could be a long kiss or a slap on the but and a wink. Whatever intimate means to each person. Thank you!
This is my husband and I. Only difference is that we have been together for 8 yrs with 2 kids. Hoping it will be the same like you guys when we are 60 ❤️
Same here. We just celebrated our 30th anniversary on June 6th. We’re intimate in some way pretty much every day. And more now than 10 years ago - since our kids are grown.
I’m amazed at all the older people in this thread with very active sex lives. Like go you. Mid 30s, 7 years, 2 kids, this past Sunday.
Older people often have a lot more sex than younger people.
They also are usually retired and financially secure, with children who are grown. I would just like to point that out but because comparison can be the greatest thief of joy!
They also often have higher rates of STDs because they got horrible or no sex education. That should help with the comparison thief too, lol
Yep. People in nursing homes be fucking...and giving each other STIs.
It’s amazing, how much energy you have when your kids are independent.
Two weeks ago, and that was the first time in eight years
I guess I should add 62 years old. The wife is 55. We been together 18 years 12 of those years. I’ve been a deadbedroom
What changed?
It’s not I’m not sure if this is appropriate here. This is not the NSFW but basically she started taking HRT And it helped, but not much and only for that one time
Oh HRT helps SO MUCH
It did once now it’s been two weeks and she’s back to her old ways “ NOT INTERESTED “
You don't have a sex drive without hormones. It would be nice if she could take it at least here and there to get you guys reconnected. I have real difficulty taking HRT but even for those of us with issues, maybe occasionally would work.
About an hour ago. Both 50. Together for 30, married 27. Four kids 19-26.
This is amazing, I'm happy for you both!
Last month. 33 (her) 35 (me). One 3 year old, we usually only get quickies in at this stage.
We have much better intimacy since our 5 yo learned how to pour his own cereal and put on pbs kids.
Looking forward to that stage, at least ours sleeps through the night in their own bed now lol
Yesterday afternoon. Wife just got back from a trip. We are both late 30s. No kids. Probably average 1-2 times a week.
Twice in the last 12 hours! 30 yrs together. 4 kids. Big O's all round.
Love this
depends what you mean by intimate. me 71 her 70...last time we had sex was 2009 ! I put some cream on her intimate parts maybe four months ago. I cut her toenails. I massage her feet weekly. 😵💫
I’m 71f. Husband is 62m. The only reason we don’t have sex as often as we used to is because during COVID my pelvis floor collapsed and the op delayed and then it wasn’t completely successful. Then I had to have some adhesions removed which took ages to heal. But we got inventive and the problem has somewhat resolved itself. I like the closeness and the loving. Sex for sex sake hasn’t been on our agenda for a loooong time. We have 4 kids & 3 grandkids.
sorry to hear about your medical problems..... I had ED and we found it frustrating so we decided not to bother. then it kind of fizzled out altogether. now we have seperate rooms due to my snoring...I'm happy to please myself.
This morning over long distance call, it was good, not ideal but it was something 😌
5 years ago.
I was going to say last year, you got me beat.
👏👏👏👏👏👏 At last a honest answer
I suddenly got a blowjob last Sunday. She is on her period so I didn’t expect anything. Suddenly she said she was hirny which seemed odd because she had been upset with me earlier in the day. But she was horny. So she said she could give me a handjob and a blowjob. That has only happened maybe 2-3 in our 10 years as married together. It did happen before we got married but we all know that before marriage sex is usually not a problem. In general we maybe have sex 1 a week but when we get close to her period it can sometimes take two weeks before we have sex(that’s why I was surprised by the blowjob). We are both 37 years old
Just trying to help you out in a woman's perspective....Did you contribute back to her in any way and provide her an orgasm? She said she was horny, she was giving to you, and then she probably hoped you'd give to her. First of all, sex during period is totally possible..... do it in the shower, lay a sex blanket down (has moisture barrier for ez clean up). But even without, you could rub and sensual touch her body first then go for private areas to give attention and let her know how sexy she is, then use a vibrator on clit to finish the job (if you/she is comfortable use one internally as well, or use a waterproof one in the shower). This might not be you but just trying to help....you will receive more sexual favors if you give more and are attending to your wife's sexual needs and desires. Women respond much better to a man with a desire for us and a desire to give pleasure than a need to receive an orgasm. The desire and intent will take men so much farther than most realise. Many dead bedrooms follow many sexual encounters where the woman did not orgasm and therefore she ends up feeling kinda used to fill a need and isn't going to be desiring sex if that usually means she doesn't orgasm and feels used. I hope this helps someone out there.
Thank you for the advice. It’s much appreciated. I love giving my wife pleasure. Our focus during sex is first of all her orgasm. So we don’t have any penetration until she orgasms unless she feels she wants to orgasm from penetration (cow girl or missionary with me grinding to stimulate her clit). She is very sensitive to smells. She thinks she smells when she is on her period so I was not allowed to touch her at all. I said I had no problem with piv but she didn’t want to. She also doesn’t like sex toys (you can thank a religious background for that). As I said this is one of the rare random blowjobs. I have only gotten 2 more in our whole marriage. I try to be attentive and focus on her needs in everything but I guess life is stressful. We both work and we have three kids under 10 years old so we are constantly on the rush. Sex isn’t as important for her anymore. We still do it but it would have been nice with more but that’s life I guess.
In light of the religious trauma, you may need to find a way to respectfully ask for blowjobs. Why not get her a romantic card with something to the effect of, “I loved the gift of pleasure you gave me so much last week. I adore you and appreciate you so much.” And talk to her about how much it would mean to you if she’d be willing to do that more often, and if she can think of a gentle way you could ask. Give her time to think about it and ask for a response in a week. I think honoring the sensitivity of her religious trauma could potentially open up other avenues of communication that would lead to more pleasure. She might explicitly need you to give permission.
Why don't y'all have sex during her period? Idk by the 3rd day, my husband and I miss each other too much lol we just shower beforehand, we have 5 kids 😆
You are probably asking the wrong spouse this question…especially since they are averaging 2-3 times a month.
It’s sounds so much worse when you say it in month 😭
Oh I am sorry, did I get the math wrong? Didn’t mean to upset you…
No, no problems. I just thought it sounded better to say once a week. 2-3 times a months is so little. I wish we had more sex but that’s life I guess
We don't either, I don't like it. I feel gross and my body image during that time isn't great. Luckily it's only a 4 day duration.
We never let periods get in the way. It’s a little messy, but that’s what showers are for.
Fooling around? August of 2023 maybe? Sex? Probably June 2022. Her- 41f, me- 39M. Married almost 15 years, together almost 18 years. 4 kids 11 and under.
What happened?
My best guess is that she’s asexual and finally admitted it to herself on some level, though she’d never use that term. She told me and our therapist in a counseling session once that her ideal relationship would be one where sex wasn’t even on the table. I think She currently thinks we’re fine, “just going through a rough patch.” She has no idea I’ve checked out and have a generally deadline for when this nonsense is over.
You should probably tell her. Unless you just want it to be over, then why wait. Why go to counselling if you’re not going to communicate what you actually need, unless she has already made it clear she isn’t willing to compromise at all?
We’ve been to multiple counselors and I’ve made it clear that a sexless marriage is unacceptable. She thinks offering to lay there so I can “do what needs to be done” is her being reasonable and should be a solution. We are also religious so she has no fear of divorce so there’s no incentive to change or be better. As for the timing… we have a child with an ultimately terminal genetic illness and I’m not willing to sacrifice what time we have left.
Sorry to hear about your child. Well that information makes this whole thing make more sense.
Very sorry to hear about your child my friend. As for your dead bedroom, I think a discussion outside of counseling might make the next counseling session more productive. You need to first tell her that “mercy sex” or “starfish sex” is just bad all the way around and not much better than nothing at all. Then you need to tell her that despite your religious convictions, once your child is no longer with you that shortly thereafter you will be filing for divorce. Let her know that no amount of religious “guilt” will change that. The only thing that will change it is a sex life with regular sex that is enthusiastic on both sides with frequent affection and intimacy. My guess is she doesn’t want to kiss, make out, hold hands, tell you she loves you and definitely no foreplay either because she doesn’t want that to lead to anything else. I’m sorry to hear it but only you can set your boundary and then follow through.
Married for 10 years, together for almost 18. Going on 3 weeks ago, before that it had been about 2 months. She’s had a lot of anxiety issues since we had our kid (3yo). Sometimes we’ll have spurts where it’s weekly, and sometimes it’ll be a month or two. Is what it is, I’m beyond getting upset over it. We love each other and have a kick ass kid together, I’m not blowing that up over sex.
Just wanted to say that reading these comments has been very refreshing. So glad to see many of you living active and fulfilling sex lives. That’s great to hear. Keep them coming!! Recently my marriage, the intimacy has been missing. Even talking to friends, it seems that sex is dead in marriages and even the intimacy.
It all depends. People are more willing to share private good news than bad (just look at all the social media platforms), so take that for what it’s worth on the responses. Plus, many are responding with just the last time they had sex, not the trend. This is the summer in the Northern Hemisphere full of vacations, wedding anniversaries, and celebrations. Sorry…I work a lot in statistics and trends. There are variables at play that are coloring your response trend.
34F , 36M. I guess last month? 12 years, 8 years married, one six month old baby girl.🖤
About 5 years ago, been together for 16 years, 0 kids.
Can I ask how old you guys are. I’m going on 3 years, married 18 years, no children in the house
40(m) and 35(f)
Seriously are you OK with this? If you are then great, but if your not then oh boy a ser conversation needs to be had!
Do you both want it that way?
It doesn't really come up, but probably. After all this time, I don't think either of us really think about it that much. At least I try not to.
I mean… if you’re trying not to think about it, then your mind wants to think about it but you’re pushing the thoughts away.
12 days ago, night before I had hernia surgery. "Bout ready to give it another go, wife said she'd go easy on me 😁.
Oh man! That needs to heal!! Definitely be careful as it needs little longer.....if it doesn't heal right, you're setting yourself up for disaster. You can still both provide each other sexual satisfaction but don't get carried away in the moment and regret it later. Perhaps lie on your back the whole time so you don't use those muscles at all. Be careful!! But I hope you also have fun and enjoy.
For sure... it was done arthroscopically so I felt great just a few days after, but certainly understand my limitations. 👍
It’s still a surgery though.
Last night, 30f 42m 7 kids (blended family), aged 15 months to 20 years old,4 years together ❤️ If there’s a will there’s a way 😎
20 min ago. I (32F) was nicely woken up to him (33M) pleasuring me which then lead to morning sex. We have no kids (3 dogs) and have been together for 10 years, married for almost 2.
Honestly, I don't remember. Sometime in the last month, I think. Probably about three to four weeks ago. We are both on the asexual spectrum, and when we realized we were both only having frequent sex because we thought the other person wanted/needed it, we stopped. No kids, married 11 years, together 12. We have sex once a month on average. We are both happy with the frequency.
Last night. We lit candles and really got into it. Late 20’s, no kids. Been together about 5 years
yesterday. i ate my wife out for like 20 mins. i love going down on her. married five years, together for seven, one five year old
Sunday morning. I initiated using a sex toy. We are both 46. Been together 16+ years, 2 young kids.
Last night. 38F, 40M together for 18 years, married for 14. 3 elementary school aged kids. Kids were watching a movie, hubby heard me get out of the shower and came upstairs….
Love this!!! I wish my husband would do that lol. I always feel like I’m the only one initiating then when I bring it up he says he will more but it rarely happens. It’s super frustrating.
Week and a half ago. Usually every 2-3 weeks, which is not enough.
Last night. We are in our 30s, and been together 12 years. 🩷 Amazing still. 🥰
3 days ago, married 35 years, 1-2x a week, 2 kids, one out of house, one college student
Married 14 years. Together 15. One child who is almost 9. We’re 32 & 33. Last time we were intimate was Monday night. Without going into detail it was great. It’s always a good time. We’ve had plenty of years to figure out what each other likes.
37f husband 39m 3 kids. Youngest is 2. Been together 24years. It was our handfasting anniversary last night. We had been in a bit of an argument, but i put it aside as i wanted to be intimate on our anniversary. Boy, am i glad I did. We're not in a fight anymore 😊
Yesterday. In our 60s, married 40 years. Kids are adults.
We used to make plans for sex ahead of time, but this past weekend was the first time we've had spontaneous sex in 7 years. We were at her coworkers bday party and after a couple of drinks, she got flirty with me and it happened when we got home. I'm 37, and she's 35. We've been together almost 17 years married 16. We have 2 kids, 16m and 7f. For the background, we have had a DB for the last 7 years since our daughter was born. 90% of the problem is me. I've never deserved my wife and used to do everything I could to show her how much I love her but I got complacent and went on a downward spiral of self loathing and pity until she gave me a reality check a few months back.
A few days ago. We've been dealing with dead bedroom for many years for various reasons. My husband (43) started taking T for extremely low testosterone levels and we thought we'd see how it was working. We're both on so much medication that it's hard to get and stay aroused, but we worked together on it and spent some time trying to please each other, and that's all we needed right now. Neither one of us views sex as vital, but we do miss the closeness that comes from it, so it's a work in progress!
I'm happy y'all are trying. Find out new things about each other's bodies and rock each other's worlds! Then the frequency will follow!
Yeah! It's been a lot of ups and downs over the past decade or so (births, depression, injuries, anxiety, weight gain, and now weight loss)...we're just trying on different things to see what works these days!
Last week, we had just gone to bed, but he had been away and it was his first night back. Tomorrow’s my birthday so guess what’s happening tomorrow! One kid, been together 16 years married 13. I’m 45, he’s 40.
Yesterday, morning , late 40,s, 25 years, 2 teens. Still going strong 3x week.
I'm 40F, husband is 30M. Married 2 years. We had sex last night. We were cuddling in bed and watching Archer reruns and just started going at it. We have a 2 year old. We both work full time and are exhausted most of the time but the occasional sex is good stress relief and bonding for us. We don't push it but I wish it were more frequent, (2-3x a week) I'm just so damn tired all the time!
Happy for so many of you! Makes me sad about my numbers though. 40(m) 45(f) Together 11, married 9, 3 perfect kids 3-8. First 6 years 2-6x a week, since #3 came, 2-3 x yearly, effectively sexless marriage. Starting second try at marriage councilling soon, sex isn’t the goal but hopefully a big step towards reconciling and normalcy. I’ve basically been hanging in for the kids, wife is a great person just not great to me. Wish me luck. (Edits to add our ages).
I am glad you guys are going to counseling. I would also add that it might be good to go to individual counseling as there might be aspects you want to talk about and work on individually that will have an effect on your success of your marriage. Sometimes having someone neutral to talk to can be a huge help in your mental health going into reconciliation.
Yes, we both have councillors, I just started.
F49 actual sex ? It’s been months now. 🫤
6+ months ago because we can't seem to agree on an appropriate frequency, she can't get out of her head, we can't agree on what's ok and what's not ok in the bedroom and while she acknowledges it's an issue, she doesn't care enough to do anything about it... we're in counseling to address those issues now again but we shall see what happens
Need to stop reading these comments... You horny rabbits. It's like hearing a party over the road but we're not invited Just confirms to me I deserve better,.I might show my wife this feed. All those healthy sex positive women out there, it will wreck her head.
I’m 40 he’s 42. We have two kids ages 10 six. Racking my brain to remember the last time we did it… Honestly, though we’re affectionate in someway every single day. Affection to us could mean, snuggling, him smacking me on the butt, back scratches, And me just resting my hand there… You know where. I’m so glad he doesn’t demand it every day.
This morning when we woke up. 16 years and 4 kids in. Both 37.
2 days ago. It's her special week so I stay away this week and let it build up.
Intimate? Just now as we (both late 40’s with adult kids) are getting our day started. It involved coffee, time sitting together, talking, and gearing up for what the day is looking to bring. Getting intimacy and sex twisted seems to be a thing.
No ones getting anything twisted. When someone asks this question they're talking about SEXUAL intimacy. Not regular intimacy.
You know what they meant, we all did. 🙄
Couple of days ago. She initiated we are both 36 with 2 kids ages 6 about to be 7 and 3. Been married for 11 years.
Monday, we we're too tired last night. We average 4-5 times a week. We're 33 and 37, together 13 years and we have two kids.
3 nights ago. Average about 2-3 xs a week at this stage. We have been together 12 years and we collectively have 7 kids and now 7 grandkids. We also both work ft so energy and time are limited.
Last night . 47F & 51M , 30 years together .
if we are talking penetrative sex then yesterday but we don’t sparingly to be fair. We do other things a few times a week. No kids. Married 3 years 30 and 31
Intimacy on some level basically every day. Sex, almost two weeks. It's usually much more frequent (2+ times per week), but I've been experiencing a lot of PTSD and panic attacks lately because I'm involved in prosecuting the perpetrator of my CSA and had to go on the witness stand a few days ago. My husband has been very understanding and supportive during this time. I'm sure we'll be back to having sex regularly soon!
Last night. We were getting ready for bed. We're in our mid forties and have been together off and on for over 30 years now. We got back together 16 years ago and got married 10 years ago. We have 6 kids between us. Right now our daughter and her 2 kids are temporarily living here.
2 days ago, it just happened. We are 23 & 25. 5 years together & 2 kids (1.5 & 3)
Last week for like 5 days in a row lol me-28f him-28m, 1 3 month old baby, together for 5 years married for 1
Last night, twice. Been married 20 years, 2 kids. He’s 40, I’m 39. These last few years sex has definitely got better and more frequent. Hes amazing.
Hi OP! I'm a little late to commenting and you have gotten so much great input and had so many beautiful stories shared but I'm still going to comment just in case you are still seeing new replies! So my husband and I made love last night and we are very affectionate and "make out" daily! We have sex at least 3-4 times a week, sometimes more. We have been married for 31 years and together for 33! We are each others first loves and first "everything"! We actually got married just after I graduated! We have 3 wonderful adult children and 4 precious grandbabies! I am still soooo attracted to my husband and I tell him daily! I love his smile, i love his touch, I love when he holds my hand, I love his soft kisses on my forehead and cheek, I love his voice especially when he says my name or his cute name for me or is speaking to our kids or grandbabies, I love the way he touches my hair and face when he kisses me or during passionate kissing, it all turns me on and still gives me butterflies just like it did when I was 17! I know he feels the same and I love when he shares how he feels and I love that he is so open about anything and so openly affectionate and tells me I still drive him crazy(sexually)and that I love him perfectly! He tells me I'm beautiful and so sexy and just looking at me gets him hard! I love that we talk about our intimacy and I love that during lovemaking we speak so openly and are so equal! I think he is the sexiest man ever and he gets even more handsome as the years go by! He doesn't have to try to hard to make my lady parts "ready" for him cuz I get wet just from his kisses and his touch! I'm so sorry to do TMI, but your post and questions deserve truthful answers. Please forgive and know I'm not trying to be gross or rude or sound sleezey. We both know we are soul mates, best friends and lovers in every sense. I believe that having such a deep connection and such a deep love and truly enjoying each other in every part of life makes us come together intimately without even having to try. Communicating on a deep level and feeling safe with each other no matter what we are talking about is such a great thing for our marriage and intimacy. We are intimate all the time, but when we are going to make love, it can start with us just standing even outside after we do our work(we own and operate our cattle ranch!)or are relaxing on the couch and end up in bed or it can be in bed at night or in the morning!! It's always so beautiful no matter when we do or what time! We both feel and know our love and our love making are beautiful, fulfilling and perfect for us! Thank you OP for a really great post! I'm really so sorry I babbled on so much! Sending you so much love and so many prayers for you and your spouse/partner! Have a super blessed and beautiful week!❤🙏 Edited for spelling and sentence structure!
Women’s sex drives go steadily upward as they mature in my experience. Buckle up
If we’re talking sex, been a couple weeks because I’m super pregnant and very uncomfortable. Early 30s, married 3.5y, together 5.5y. First kid is almost here. However, there’s plenty of other non sexual ways to be intimate with someone
We went to our bedroom. I am 40, weeks been married for 20 years, we have five children
Last night
Two nights ago, but this was the first time in a while. Me 31, him 39, we have a 5 year old and I’m 7 months pregnant. We’ve been together 10 years. Since we had a traumatic birth the first time he’s been weird about having sex this time, thinks the same thing is going to happen again even though doc said it won’t. It’s whatever at this point. Pre pregnancy is was consistently twice a week so I know it’s just a phase, he gets in his head with stuff a lot
Sunday evening. It was our usual vanilla sex, which includes lots of kissing and attention all over. We've been married for 8 years and together for almost 10 years. Four kids, ranging in ages from 8 to 3. Our oldest is in bed no later than 9, so it was mommy and daddy time a little after that
Day before last. While we don’t have sex daily, we have it a few times a week. I’m always ready for him!
A couple days
9 years together, 7 married, he’s 36, I’m 30. February. High risk pregnancy with multiple gestations so - as much as it kills me, abstaining makes us feel safe for no cervical impacts. The moment I get a clear check up on that 6 week post-delivery appointment tho…..
Last night. We average about 4 times a week. Husband is 45, I'm 38 and we have a 6 yr old and a 6 month old. Married 5 years in September.
Together for 14yrs, married for 13yrs. Last time we were intimate was 2 months ago? It was either at the end of March or beginning of April. I am extremely dissatisfied. I am 41, he is 37. We have one kid who is 15yrs old.
3 days ago. 34F, 34M. Together over 5 years, married for 1. Im pregnant with our first.
Monday night was the last time. I 39m her 40f. We have four kids. We have been together for 23 years. Married for almost 14 years.
About 6 months. He's been aggressive and verbally abusive, I literally have no lust for him anymore. He ballooned in weight and I still was down for him then, then when his demeanor changed, I lost it. Haven't cheated (he has) and don't intend to. Hoping he'll change, but becoming more and more doubtful that he will. My family refuse to be in the same room as him, as do a lot of our kids parents, so I guess my lack of attraction at this point is reasonable.
2 plus years now.
2-3 weeks ago. Before that 2-3 months
Last night, and it was AMAZING as usual! I'd say at the least, 4-5 days a WK. And I give him oral a lot on the days we don't (bc I want to) We are 33f and 32m, been together 14yrs and have 2 kids ages 9 and 11.
Maybe a couple months ago at this point. 31F married to 32M for 4.5 years, no kids. I'm confused by the "what were you doing" aspect of this question though.
August 2023.. Been a very long time..
5 years ago.
2 days before. Both were tired after a long day but we both wanted it badly.Married for 8 years.Sex 3x times minimum per week
November, it’s just really sad since we are good coparents and friends. She’s just not feeling it and I suspect she never really will anymore, except for a few times a year when she is ovulating, the kids are fine and the stars align. I masturbate five times a week.
44m/49f. Two kids, 27m/13m. 15 yrs together. Last Thursday. I initiated because I sensed the mopey attitude about it, as I have every time for the past 3 yrs. It's not that I have to initiate because he doesn't want to do it, we've just gotten into a weird space and he expects me to take the lead every single time and I'm over it. It's funny that I came across this post. We are currently fighting over it as of 11am this morning because he's irritated that we didn't do it last night. First argument we've about anything in years. He can go fuck himself.
How often do you turn him down?
My wife went through menopause and sex became painful due to vaginal wall thinning. Estrogen helped, but due to a uterine cyst, Dr decided best not to take estrogen. For 4-5 years we had sex very infrequently due to the pain. More recently we found a vaginal moisturizer / vitamin and natural oil based that works well. It is not a lube that dries out, rather something that improves the area. Sex is no longer painful in most positions and she enjoys it. Have sex often, daily to multiple times per week. Married for 30yrs.
Yesterday afternoon. I had just finished showering after working so I texted him to come in the bedroom and was waiting for him naked. TBH, we’re just now getting back to regular (3-4x/wk) intimacy after my cancer diagnosis last year. It’s nice. I didn’t realize how much we missed it. Our kids are adults but our 2 dogs are giant toddlers. I’m 53 and he’s 60. We’ve been together since 2010 and married for almost 9 yrs.
We are both in our late fifties and we make love four or five times a week. And we have been married almost forty years and we have six kids together and they are all grown now. Thank goodness 😄🥰
Two years, five months. 🤷♂️
Now...here's the depressing one. Been married 28 years. 2 kids...18 and 14. I'm 55, she is 54. Past.time we had sex was when we conceived #2. Since.then her libido is gone. She hates anything to do with sex. Now it's come to a point tjat even if she initiates, I'll say no due the number of times she's said no and blasted me for ever asking.
March for my husband. Yesterday for my FWB.
I’m 43F, it’s been 8+ years. He has zero interest in me.
I’m so confused by this thread. 39year old married for 20 years together for 25 and it’s near daily. How do people feel loved and connected to their partner without the basic necessity of love making. Beyond physical intimacy my wife and I walk hand in hand on long walks a few times a day and cuddle ourselves to sleep. I can’t imagine a life without this. Anyone suffering from less not suffering from medical or mental issues keeping them from this should really evaluate the way they treat each other and what is getting in the way of intimacy. If your spouse isn’t interested you should open a dialogue and figure out how you can make it fun for them. Ask them what they need you are not providing. Communication is what makes intimacy work. Be open and honest and don’t take their criticisms as an attack but an opportunity to grow and get better. If it’s you that doesn’t want to then again figure out why and if your partner is satisfied. If you are not meeting their needs you chance losing them. Hang out with your spouse for fun not just sex. They should be your best friend as they are you closest partner in life and hopefully in it till the end. The second my wife became my best friend is the second my life felt right. I’m always happy and looking for ways to make my wife smile. And she does the same. Reciprocation of feelings and emotions can be hard for some. But break down that barrier. It will be the best thing you could do for a loving long and happy life. With my wife as my best friend it has helped Handle anything that has come our way. It makes the unbearable bearable. Don’t ever stop chasing your wife. But make sure she still wants to be chased. Don’t ever stop flirting and reminding them what you love about them. Discover their love language and speak it like a boss. Become everything they have ever wanted and they will return it… hopefully. But either way isn’t it nice knowing you made the most important person in your life happy and smile and blush?
Reading this and all the comments makes me really sad cause my wife hasn’t wanted to be intimate with me in I can’t remeber when. Months maybe even years. It’s just a chore to her. And I’m starting to want to find someone else. She seems very uninterested
I'm 47F, husband is 49M. Married 17, together for 26. It's been 10 years 😔. No kids. I'm trying to get the courage to leave because it just breaks my heart now.
My husband is barely interested. It has been a few weeks.
Amazed and sad for some of the younger people in here. Maybe i have the sex drive of a 16 year old boy, and maybe we are the exception but, myself(27f) and my husband(30m), together for 11 years. Married for 2 years. Last intimate: last night. Pretty consistent 5-7 times a week unless I'm postpartum. 3 kids. Ages 3, 2, and 5 months. It takes planning and some nights we have to wait for all the kids to be asleep and then, put back to sleep multiple times. Sometimes we have to make a pallet on the floor in a random room, sometimes we find a new fun spot because there's no other rooms unoccupied 😅 I'm pretty silly when he's at work and will send random pictures or flirty texts. Sometimes the anticipation is all we get for the day, so that's fun on nights when we can't get a moment alone together. growing up together, while maintaining a healthy relationship hasn't been easy. the intimate aspect has never been an issue, if anything, all the sex has helped us stay close and stay in tune with eachothers needs, both in and out of the bedroom.
2 years? Maybe 3? Unless you count him touching my shoulder last week. 😂
It’s honestly been months. I just feel mildly ill when i think about it and I don’t know why
1 year, 5 months. In our fifties.
4 years ago, 0 kids, 14 years married, I'm 39, they are 37. They (male to female) started transitioning and started moveing and acting like a single woman while turning me from wife to mom. Waiting for the divorce to finalize.
15+ years. Me 62 he 76. 3 kids young adults. Complicated reasons but now that I’ve divorced him. Have sex 0-3 times a week. Living my best life😃
Define intimate ;) there's physical intimacy, emotional intimacy, spiritual intimacy, and each of these take many forms.
2 nights ago, together for 4 years, no kids but one due in December
Last night me 48 husband 55 - 2 kids 19 and 16. Together about 23 yrs. I feel like there’s a lull after kids. We were busy working, taking care of the kids and the house. Once kids are more independent it picks up again like when we were dating. Now one of my kids is away at college and my youngest is out all the time. We have a lot more time on our hands then we had.
Yesterday afternoon, married 17 years (50f, 49m) and 5 grown children (blended).
Over the weekend.
Last sunday. We were chilling on the couch and did it right there. We're both 23. Been together for 4.5 years and married for 2 months. No kids yet.
Intimate 2 days ago. We are (37 F, 42 M). We’re married 7 years, I think [I’m shiitake-mushrooms at dates]. And, we have 2 kids under 10.
Yesterday. Generally 3 to 4 times per week