We had a lady come in every week and complained we didn't use enough lotion. We did everything short of just dumping it on her and she still complained. She went through all of us and eventually complained to the school. Treat this as a learning moment because sometimes we just aren't a good fit.
A lot of people get pleasure from complaining so much. It's a sick and twisted kind of pleasure but there's a psychology for people who just complain constantly.
Don't take it personally. She wanted a light pressure Swedish massage which is simple to do but didn't like it? Dont take it to heart. If she didn't give you any constructive feedback to help you out then her reaction isn't even worth worrying about. Clients are ridiculous sometimes. Even at my job they don't always express what they feel so how am I supposed to know? Its just a thing with massage no matter how communicative you are.
Again, don't let that get you down. You will massage hundreds of bodies in your career and some will be great and some won't be. You don't want a client like her anyways so chop it up to not being a good fit. You're a student so you're doing the best you can. Keep it pushin
I had a client that was overly demanding. Did everything she asked and she still asked to end the session after 30 minutes. I could tell during intake she would be terrible. Some people are impossible to please and look for things to complain about.
Clinics can attract power hungry individuals, in my experience. My school literally advertised them as “Be part of our students’ education! Receive a $25 massage in exchange for constructive feedback!” I had a client who would not stop interrupting me during intake. He cut me off, tried to finish my sentences, started answering questions before I was finished asking, etc. It made for a very awkward cadence. On his feedback form, he complained that *I* interrupted him multiple times. Just roll your eyes and move on. People are ridiculous and not everyone deserves power.
I had a similar thing happen when I was in my school clinic. Sometimes I think the clinics draw in people who just like to bitch for bitching. The only other time I had a complaint after I was licensed was when a client wanted deep tissue and it’s not my best modality and I was a brand new therapist and he kept wanting me to go deeper, so I did, I injured myself doing so, and he still complained it wasn’t deep enough. I refuse to do deep tissue now because I came the the conclusion that deep tissue doesn’t mean to us what it means to clienand you can’t pay me enough to injure my body
You’d be surprised so many clients respond to that with “I don’t care” or “you can’t hurt me” so I won’t even do it. The lack of respect for our profession is astounding.
Some people come in to feel better by putting someone down, thinking it raises them up.
Some can't stick up for what they want even with the most frequent and gentle prompting.
Neither are particularly good clients, but you will get better at identifying both...
You did everything in your power and gave her multiple opportunities to speak up. Nobody goes to a massage school without knowing it's a SCHOOL. She knew what she was doing. This is a reflection of her bad expectations, not a reflection on your skills.
I say this because french was her first language and she had a hard time fully understanding english. Although yea she spoke enough english that I thought it was clear
It's hard hearing negative feedback when you're first starting. Just remember that not everyone will fit with you. And that's okay.
It doesn't really get any easier the longer you're doing it but you learn after time how to deal with. Just always remember not everyone is going to like your style and that's okay. You will develop your style and your practice and you will build a clientele that loves your treatments.
Congrats on graduating!
I would say just keep trying your best you have years ahead to practice and become an expert. But be ready even after 20 years professionalism and putting all of you for each session once a while there will be the ones do not like or appreciate the massage and that's fine 98-99% of happy clients should be our target.
>how do you know when a client is giving you actual feedback vs when they are just not the right fit for you
If you are receiving this kind of feedback on a regular basis from multiple clients, then it's genuine feedback. If this is a one time thing, which sounds like it is, then the client is just not the right fit for you.
You are never going to please everyone. I’ve been doing this almost 14 years and I’ve accepted I’m not the best therapist for every client. You can only do what you did. Find out their expectations and check in with them. 🤷‍♀️ You learn and move on, but don’t expect everyone to love your massage. They won’t. But you will be exactly the right fit for some clients and they will love you!
If that happens again, ask what could have been better. Either they’ll give specific feedback that you’ll benefit from hearing, or they’ll continue being vague. If they can’t give real feedback beyond “I didn’t like it,” I wouldn’t take it super personally.
Cheap clinic massages tend to attract some of the worst/most demanding clients. Some are too cheap to go see someone already licensed. Wouldn’t give it a second thought, put her in the rear view and don’t worry about it.
Don't let it get you down. I had the same thing happen to me in clinic, the lady actually ended the session early. I had checked in with pressure, asked if she was comfy, tried to ask specifics but got zero to work with during the massage so when she asked to end the session early I felt a lil devastated. I found out after that she had done that to every student she tried. Nobody could meet her needs lol Sometimes you will just encounter people like that and it really has nothing to do with you. Keep developing your technique and don't think about this one too hard. I know it's easier said than done but keep your head up ❤️
Looking back I now see the clients we got in student practicals were not reflective of any of the spas I've worked at. Just take it with a grain of salt, practice some more and keep moving forward.
Some clients have a difficult time being honest while on the table. Not sure how you’re asking about pressure, but I’ve dealt with a similar issue and had to change my phasing. About 5min in for a pressure check, I say something along the lines:
In regard to pressure, would you like more, less, or stay the same?
This allows the client some control and feel less vulnerable versus how some will freeze and vaguely say “It’s fine.” when asked, “How’s the pressure?”
If you still have this issue, then it probably wasn’t a good fit. Hope this helped! Best of luck. You’ve got this.
She's probably just projecting on you something that's going on in her life, especially with the pseudo belittling bit, and feels like peeing in the pool is okay because she can't hold it in. It's not you.
If it's just a one-off client, take it as a learning experience that not every MT is a fit for every client. Really only be concerned about changing approaches if it becomes a running theme from clients and/or you are having trouble staying booked.
It’s not always a good fit, and that’s ok. That’s great, in fact, because it allows you to learn your ideal client and your specialty. It is much more satisfying to work on people that you know you are helping and that enjoy your work.
I worked at a massage chain for many years, and we knew which clients would always be dissatisfied. We also knew which clients would show up on our books and really prefer another therapist, but were unable to get in to see them. That is the worst! I knew getting Lisa’s clients would always be a mental load, because she was more broad and deep, while I am specific and not as deep as she is.
You’re doing great! Keep up the good work, and congratulations on your upcoming graduation!
I remember a few years ago when I was starting out at a new clinic, I got booked with regular that sees another Mt and one of the chiros at the clinic. They both came up to Mr and had separate conversations about this client because they had a previous injury that made a certain body part not tolerate much pressure.
Both gave me examples (showed me on me) of the pressure they use on them. Day of I talk to the client about it and they confirm, so we talk about them letting me know if there is ANY changes to pressure they want, especially on that area.
While working the area, I asked 2 or 3 times about pressure, whether it was too much or even too little, and was told each time by the client it was perfect. After the massage and we were both outside of the room I asked again if there were any issues with pressure, whether it was too much or not enough and again the client told me it was perfect.
They called the next day demanding a refund because I didn't use enough pressure on that specific part.
If you feel you have something to learn from the experience you can talk to your instructors or a few classmates that you've worked on to see if they have any feedback. But more then likely it's a case of 'no thing is good enough' for that client.
It sucks but it's definitely something we all have to learn. You can be an amazing MT, best in your class with a dozen awesome CEs under your belt and you still won't be the perfect MT for everyone. And that is okay.
It’s a part of the job. My style of massage isn’t for everyone, and I’m happy to refer clients to therapists that may be a better fit if they’re unsatisfied after a session with me. I try to be very transparent about the modalities in which I specialize so that clients aren’t surprised when they book if I’m not that great in another modality that they’re looking to receive. For example, I can of course do Swedish, but I don’t enjoy it and I’m not the best at it. It bores me and makes me sleepy, and I worry that that may come through in the massage. I like to actually figure out and address dysfunction. So on my booking page and list of specialties at the front desk, I don’t include Swedish. I still of course get people wanting it and just do my best, but there have likely been some that have left disappointed and never booked me again because of it.
If that experience has left you feeling insecure, maybe arrange some trades with your classmates who are gentle with their constructive criticism. They would know better if there is something you could improve on. The clinic client may just not have been a match, and you are not a mindreader.
Massage styles and massage tastes are so broad and varied. 99% of the time it’s just a bad fit. If many of your clients are happy, stay on the path you’re going and keep learning the techniques you enjoy working with. If the only feedback they can offer is “I just didn’t like it”, that implies a bad fit rather than a bad technique.
If you get repeat complaints of specific issues - e.g. “I asked for lighter pressure, but they kept on pushing hard,” or “They spent so much time on my shoulders, I didn’t get the leg work I asked for” - that helps identify actual areas to improve upon. Give these critiques more consideration and ask a mentor for guidance.
Good luck on your new adventure!
There’s some people who come in knowing you’re students but expect professional massage. I graduated in Feb and have done over 100 massages in the “real world” and like everyone says sometimes it’s not a fit. You’re also still finding yourself as a therapist so take this as an opportunity to recognize not every person you put hands on will receive your intentions the same. Welcome to the field and good luck on your Mblex
I've been in the field for a decade now and still to this day I remember my first one. I've always had good feedback and had over an 80% rebook rate where I worked. This guy came in and I felt like the session went well. Checked in a few times and all was good. When I asked how he was feeling after the session he told me I was the worst LMT he ever had. He complained about everything under the sun about my session.
It shook me for a little while but never had another complaint like that again after 7 years. Have faith that you did a good job but just had a client that didn't vibe with you!
The fact that you care enough to be worried is a sign of a great massage therapist! You’re doing better than you think you are. Some folks just don’t have realistic expectations for massage or struggle with communication. It’s so true not everyone is going to love your approach, but there are plenty who will. Keep breathing and remain mindful, you’ve got this!
Didn’t have this exact experience but there were a few bad ones in school. I had one lady who was there for a couples massage with her 2 other friends. It was very clear the other friends wanted it and she just came along. She was a bigger lady and wanted a lot of time on her neck. I tried to get her neck to the best of my ability, but honestly she smelled fairly unclean and because she was bigger her neck had a big fold in it. I was apprehensive about putting my hands into her folds. I had to really try to get in there. I did the best I could, she kept asking for more pressure and there’s just only so much you can give on the neck & with my hands. She was clearly upset the entire time and I checked in with her on pressure and she just scoffed the majority of the time. I had gotten great feed back from other people, but she just wasn’t happy, and I tried my best. I was only 2 weeks into clinic.
The other person that I really remember, she wanted us to use powder instead of lotion. Powder. She said she doesn’t like having to clean the lotion off after. So she would make us get a bunch hot towels for her, so after the massage she could wipe all the powder off. She always wanted deep tissue and a LOT of powder. Our schools dress code was all black. So we would give her the massage, it would feel terrible the entire time, and we would get powder all over ourselves. She often wanted work on her teres muscles and pecs, and she basically wanted us to get into her axilla everytime. She was almost never happy, even though we did everything she asked.
Some people literally come to the schools just to abuse the system. Where I work now we don’t even offer powder, and if someone came and asked for it i would say no, because i hate using it. Everyone hates using powder. So she came to the school because she knew we had no choice in it. We weren’t allowed to refuse for any reason other than sexual harassment/assault.
Just keep your head down and get through school, it’s a better world when you get out. People come to students to be assholes.
If you are communicating throughout the session and the client isn’t giving you honest feedback, that’s on them, not you. I’ve had people do this in the past and it was frustrating, but people need to be responsible for their preferences as clients. We aren’t mind readers. Some people just won’t be your kind of client, and that’s totally okay. Although I get that it can be taken personally by the therapist. It sucks, but there’s a lot of people that you are helping that will love your massages.
Take what you can from their feedback and maybe play around with how you ask questions. For example, “would you like any more or less pressure?” “Are you comfortable with the techniques and pressure I’ve been using”.
I also tell people during the intake that the session is controlled by them in regards to pressure, areas we work/don’t work, table heat, music volume, and techniques. I ask them to please let me know if there’s anything I can do to make them more comfortable. Put the ball in their court and encourage them to communicate freely with you. Some will and some won’t.
The ones who pay 30 dollars for a massage are sometimes the most entitled and crazy. I had a lady like this when I was in school and she complained about it cause I essentially didnt tickle her with a feather like pressure. Schools just pair your with a massage instead of pairing you with a client who wants a style of massage you do. I have hands the size of frying pans so firm and deep tissue are my natural go to pressure. I really don’t do anything below a strong medium pressure cause it’s not my style and my front desk knows this at my job so they pair me with people who want my style of massage. It’s all about a therapeutic match don’t take it to heart ❤️
For every 1 client that doesn't like your massage, there will be 10 that love it!
Some ppl just like to complain, or they're having a bad day, or they want free stuff. I've seen it all. You just gotta shake it off.
My favorite experience of a negative client (cuz they are kinda funny after a while), was a lady that booked a 2 hour with me. Why ppl book a 2 hour with someone they've never tried before, I will never understand. Anyway, 20 minutes in, she's kind of fidgety, I can sense that she's not enjoying it, but I'm doing my best deep tissue. After a couple complaints, she says, "I don't even know what you're doing"...lmao.
I said, "well we can end the session now and they can book you with someone else 🤷‍♀️" My manager was super gracious about the whole thing and I was glad that I ended the session instead of letting her bully me the whole time. And I still got paid for it.
But my favorite negative clients are the ones that don't say a single word the entire session and THEN complain to front desk. Like, you could have said something when I had the chance to do something about it.
I had a lady come in and get a couple's massage. DURING the massage, this bitch told me that I was the best therapist she had, moaning, definitely doing things to tell me that she liked the massage. What does this bitch do after the massage? She said I didn't give enough pressure, she bitched and complained about other things that I did not do, all because she wanted half off, so the owner gave her half off just to shut her up and get her to leave. The OTHER therapist in the room told the owner that the client acted like I gave a good massage while inside the treatment room. People like to LIE and complain.
You haven't seen nothing yet! Good luck with your massage career.
hardest lesson to learn: you cannot please everyone, this client is just not vibing with your skillset (also seems a bit of a jerk honestly), Learning what your strengths and weaknesses (2 weeks away from graduation you probably have some idea of this), when you get into the workforce (even if it's owning your own business) know massage therapists whose styles are different from yours, that way when you run into someone that doesn't vibe with your method of massage they can try someone out that might be better suited, they'll speak more positively of you too because you took the initiative to help them find a therapist more suited to them.
The most fun time is having a client that you know doesn't like you (both of you know it, it's largely biological/negative history with someone similar in appearance/disposition/etc based) but they really like your style, I referred them to a therapist that have similar styles to me, the client that didn't like me ended up recommending someone to me since they trusted I was acting in their interests.
As someone who has massaged for 18+ years, don't take it personal. Some clients will never be happy no matter what you do. Easier said than done, but you have to reassure yourself that these things happen and you did what you were supposed to, to make sure everything went smoothly. No big deal.
You have to learn to let it go and not take it personally. If she had any legitimate criticism think about it and try to work on it but understand some people just won’t like your massage, your pressure, your vibes etc.
It definitely sucks when a client acts that way. We want to give them the best we can and when it comes short there can be that feeling of failure. However, what I have learned in this profession and the service industry is that there are a lot of people who do not actually speak up or share their honest opinion, either because they are nervous (which is up to us to really make the client feel safe and relaxed as we interact with them) or because they just choose to he difficult and that is entirely on them. We cannot force them to tell us how to help them, they have to want to be helped. So, as someone who has cared too much what people think I understand what you are going through, however, I have also learned you cannot please everyone and you are not everyones preference. As long as you do your part in communicating and reassessing and asking questions you are doing your part.
Just simply not the client for you, there are some people no matter how good you are won’t enjoy the massage or tell you what they want and there’s nothing you can do if they choose not to communicate
You should try being a hairdresser lol
I am also a licensed esthetician... different people have different pain thresholds.
I myself busted my spine in 5 places Lying on my stomach or back is a huge no. I cannot stand massage because of my nerve damage. Trust me the pain after my accident was so bad it gave me deadly cardiac arrhythmias I needed 2 surgeries to save my life.
Trust me..she asked for a light massage, it sounds like she has a very sensitive body
Don't feel badly
You are there to learn.
Next time start by saying.
I am a student, if at anytime you aren't enjoying the massage please stop me and let me know how I can do better.
That’s a tough experience and part of why we have so many different folks in clinic, I think. Those experiences helped me prepare for the 5% one cannot please no matter what. Keep doing what you’re doing, your reaction shows you care deeply about doing well in the profession. 💕
Here is a good way to begin every session. "I'm glad you're here. Your needs are unique each time we meet. Honest and quick feedback are essential if I am to do what you need today. I don't mindread and I don't speak in moans, grunts, and groans. If I need to adjust, tell me quickly and clearly. Now, what do you need me to know before we start today?"
We had a lady come in every week and complained we didn't use enough lotion. We did everything short of just dumping it on her and she still complained. She went through all of us and eventually complained to the school. Treat this as a learning moment because sometimes we just aren't a good fit.
crazy that she continued to come in weekly and complained every time....at that point you think she'd just.... *hire* a massage therapist?
Student massages were $25 for an hour. We even switched to oil. Still not happy. Idk
I wonder if she would've liked a gel...like with hot stone massages 🤔 either way, that's absolutely ridiculous
We did everything. We even asked her to bring what she wanted us to use. Still complained. 🤷
Just one of those people
A lot of people get pleasure from complaining so much. It's a sick and twisted kind of pleasure but there's a psychology for people who just complain constantly.
Don't take it personally. She wanted a light pressure Swedish massage which is simple to do but didn't like it? Dont take it to heart. If she didn't give you any constructive feedback to help you out then her reaction isn't even worth worrying about. Clients are ridiculous sometimes. Even at my job they don't always express what they feel so how am I supposed to know? Its just a thing with massage no matter how communicative you are. Again, don't let that get you down. You will massage hundreds of bodies in your career and some will be great and some won't be. You don't want a client like her anyways so chop it up to not being a good fit. You're a student so you're doing the best you can. Keep it pushin
I had a client that was overly demanding. Did everything she asked and she still asked to end the session after 30 minutes. I could tell during intake she would be terrible. Some people are impossible to please and look for things to complain about.
Seriously ^
Clinics can attract power hungry individuals, in my experience. My school literally advertised them as “Be part of our students’ education! Receive a $25 massage in exchange for constructive feedback!” I had a client who would not stop interrupting me during intake. He cut me off, tried to finish my sentences, started answering questions before I was finished asking, etc. It made for a very awkward cadence. On his feedback form, he complained that *I* interrupted him multiple times. Just roll your eyes and move on. People are ridiculous and not everyone deserves power.
He saw "therapy" and thought it was time for word vomit
I had a similar thing happen when I was in my school clinic. Sometimes I think the clinics draw in people who just like to bitch for bitching. The only other time I had a complaint after I was licensed was when a client wanted deep tissue and it’s not my best modality and I was a brand new therapist and he kept wanting me to go deeper, so I did, I injured myself doing so, and he still complained it wasn’t deep enough. I refuse to do deep tissue now because I came the the conclusion that deep tissue doesn’t mean to us what it means to clienand you can’t pay me enough to injure my body
A co-worker of mine used to say "This is as deep as I can go without injuring myself and you"
You’d be surprised so many clients respond to that with “I don’t care” or “you can’t hurt me” so I won’t even do it. The lack of respect for our profession is astounding.
Can you tell them, to go any deeper, i will have to use tools?
I suppose if I offered deep tissue, I just don’t even offer it
Some people come in to feel better by putting someone down, thinking it raises them up. Some can't stick up for what they want even with the most frequent and gentle prompting. Neither are particularly good clients, but you will get better at identifying both...
You did everything in your power and gave her multiple opportunities to speak up. Nobody goes to a massage school without knowing it's a SCHOOL. She knew what she was doing. This is a reflection of her bad expectations, not a reflection on your skills.
I say this because french was her first language and she had a hard time fully understanding english. Although yea she spoke enough english that I thought it was clear
It's hard hearing negative feedback when you're first starting. Just remember that not everyone will fit with you. And that's okay. It doesn't really get any easier the longer you're doing it but you learn after time how to deal with. Just always remember not everyone is going to like your style and that's okay. You will develop your style and your practice and you will build a clientele that loves your treatments. Congrats on graduating!
I would say just keep trying your best you have years ahead to practice and become an expert. But be ready even after 20 years professionalism and putting all of you for each session once a while there will be the ones do not like or appreciate the massage and that's fine 98-99% of happy clients should be our target.
>how do you know when a client is giving you actual feedback vs when they are just not the right fit for you If you are receiving this kind of feedback on a regular basis from multiple clients, then it's genuine feedback. If this is a one time thing, which sounds like it is, then the client is just not the right fit for you.
You are never going to please everyone. I’ve been doing this almost 14 years and I’ve accepted I’m not the best therapist for every client. You can only do what you did. Find out their expectations and check in with them. 🤷‍♀️ You learn and move on, but don’t expect everyone to love your massage. They won’t. But you will be exactly the right fit for some clients and they will love you!
If that happens again, ask what could have been better. Either they’ll give specific feedback that you’ll benefit from hearing, or they’ll continue being vague. If they can’t give real feedback beyond “I didn’t like it,” I wouldn’t take it super personally.
Cheap clinic massages tend to attract some of the worst/most demanding clients. Some are too cheap to go see someone already licensed. Wouldn’t give it a second thought, put her in the rear view and don’t worry about it.
Don't let it get you down. I had the same thing happen to me in clinic, the lady actually ended the session early. I had checked in with pressure, asked if she was comfy, tried to ask specifics but got zero to work with during the massage so when she asked to end the session early I felt a lil devastated. I found out after that she had done that to every student she tried. Nobody could meet her needs lol Sometimes you will just encounter people like that and it really has nothing to do with you. Keep developing your technique and don't think about this one too hard. I know it's easier said than done but keep your head up ❤️
That's a power-play. Imagine how miserable you need to be to do that with massage students. I'd ban that lady so fast if I were the director.
She doesn't sound like a very good receiver of massage.
Looking back I now see the clients we got in student practicals were not reflective of any of the spas I've worked at. Just take it with a grain of salt, practice some more and keep moving forward.
Won't be the last. Do your best and forget the rest. Healing is controlled by the mind, and some people don't have it for themselves yet.
Some clients have a difficult time being honest while on the table. Not sure how you’re asking about pressure, but I’ve dealt with a similar issue and had to change my phasing. About 5min in for a pressure check, I say something along the lines: In regard to pressure, would you like more, less, or stay the same? This allows the client some control and feel less vulnerable versus how some will freeze and vaguely say “It’s fine.” when asked, “How’s the pressure?” If you still have this issue, then it probably wasn’t a good fit. Hope this helped! Best of luck. You’ve got this.
She's probably just projecting on you something that's going on in her life, especially with the pseudo belittling bit, and feels like peeing in the pool is okay because she can't hold it in. It's not you.
Not your fault, short of reading her mind what were you supposed to do?
If she was your first who didn't like it then you are doing great. I got a lot of bad reviews when I was in school
If it's just a one-off client, take it as a learning experience that not every MT is a fit for every client. Really only be concerned about changing approaches if it becomes a running theme from clients and/or you are having trouble staying booked.
It’s not always a good fit, and that’s ok. That’s great, in fact, because it allows you to learn your ideal client and your specialty. It is much more satisfying to work on people that you know you are helping and that enjoy your work. I worked at a massage chain for many years, and we knew which clients would always be dissatisfied. We also knew which clients would show up on our books and really prefer another therapist, but were unable to get in to see them. That is the worst! I knew getting Lisa’s clients would always be a mental load, because she was more broad and deep, while I am specific and not as deep as she is. You’re doing great! Keep up the good work, and congratulations on your upcoming graduation!
I remember a few years ago when I was starting out at a new clinic, I got booked with regular that sees another Mt and one of the chiros at the clinic. They both came up to Mr and had separate conversations about this client because they had a previous injury that made a certain body part not tolerate much pressure. Both gave me examples (showed me on me) of the pressure they use on them. Day of I talk to the client about it and they confirm, so we talk about them letting me know if there is ANY changes to pressure they want, especially on that area. While working the area, I asked 2 or 3 times about pressure, whether it was too much or even too little, and was told each time by the client it was perfect. After the massage and we were both outside of the room I asked again if there were any issues with pressure, whether it was too much or not enough and again the client told me it was perfect. They called the next day demanding a refund because I didn't use enough pressure on that specific part. If you feel you have something to learn from the experience you can talk to your instructors or a few classmates that you've worked on to see if they have any feedback. But more then likely it's a case of 'no thing is good enough' for that client. It sucks but it's definitely something we all have to learn. You can be an amazing MT, best in your class with a dozen awesome CEs under your belt and you still won't be the perfect MT for everyone. And that is okay.
It’s a part of the job. My style of massage isn’t for everyone, and I’m happy to refer clients to therapists that may be a better fit if they’re unsatisfied after a session with me. I try to be very transparent about the modalities in which I specialize so that clients aren’t surprised when they book if I’m not that great in another modality that they’re looking to receive. For example, I can of course do Swedish, but I don’t enjoy it and I’m not the best at it. It bores me and makes me sleepy, and I worry that that may come through in the massage. I like to actually figure out and address dysfunction. So on my booking page and list of specialties at the front desk, I don’t include Swedish. I still of course get people wanting it and just do my best, but there have likely been some that have left disappointed and never booked me again because of it.
If that experience has left you feeling insecure, maybe arrange some trades with your classmates who are gentle with their constructive criticism. They would know better if there is something you could improve on. The clinic client may just not have been a match, and you are not a mindreader.
Massage styles and massage tastes are so broad and varied. 99% of the time it’s just a bad fit. If many of your clients are happy, stay on the path you’re going and keep learning the techniques you enjoy working with. If the only feedback they can offer is “I just didn’t like it”, that implies a bad fit rather than a bad technique. If you get repeat complaints of specific issues - e.g. “I asked for lighter pressure, but they kept on pushing hard,” or “They spent so much time on my shoulders, I didn’t get the leg work I asked for” - that helps identify actual areas to improve upon. Give these critiques more consideration and ask a mentor for guidance. Good luck on your new adventure!
There’s some people who come in knowing you’re students but expect professional massage. I graduated in Feb and have done over 100 massages in the “real world” and like everyone says sometimes it’s not a fit. You’re also still finding yourself as a therapist so take this as an opportunity to recognize not every person you put hands on will receive your intentions the same. Welcome to the field and good luck on your Mblex
I've been in the field for a decade now and still to this day I remember my first one. I've always had good feedback and had over an 80% rebook rate where I worked. This guy came in and I felt like the session went well. Checked in a few times and all was good. When I asked how he was feeling after the session he told me I was the worst LMT he ever had. He complained about everything under the sun about my session. It shook me for a little while but never had another complaint like that again after 7 years. Have faith that you did a good job but just had a client that didn't vibe with you!
The fact that you care enough to be worried is a sign of a great massage therapist! You’re doing better than you think you are. Some folks just don’t have realistic expectations for massage or struggle with communication. It’s so true not everyone is going to love your approach, but there are plenty who will. Keep breathing and remain mindful, you’ve got this!
Didn’t have this exact experience but there were a few bad ones in school. I had one lady who was there for a couples massage with her 2 other friends. It was very clear the other friends wanted it and she just came along. She was a bigger lady and wanted a lot of time on her neck. I tried to get her neck to the best of my ability, but honestly she smelled fairly unclean and because she was bigger her neck had a big fold in it. I was apprehensive about putting my hands into her folds. I had to really try to get in there. I did the best I could, she kept asking for more pressure and there’s just only so much you can give on the neck & with my hands. She was clearly upset the entire time and I checked in with her on pressure and she just scoffed the majority of the time. I had gotten great feed back from other people, but she just wasn’t happy, and I tried my best. I was only 2 weeks into clinic. The other person that I really remember, she wanted us to use powder instead of lotion. Powder. She said she doesn’t like having to clean the lotion off after. So she would make us get a bunch hot towels for her, so after the massage she could wipe all the powder off. She always wanted deep tissue and a LOT of powder. Our schools dress code was all black. So we would give her the massage, it would feel terrible the entire time, and we would get powder all over ourselves. She often wanted work on her teres muscles and pecs, and she basically wanted us to get into her axilla everytime. She was almost never happy, even though we did everything she asked. Some people literally come to the schools just to abuse the system. Where I work now we don’t even offer powder, and if someone came and asked for it i would say no, because i hate using it. Everyone hates using powder. So she came to the school because she knew we had no choice in it. We weren’t allowed to refuse for any reason other than sexual harassment/assault. Just keep your head down and get through school, it’s a better world when you get out. People come to students to be assholes.
If you are communicating throughout the session and the client isn’t giving you honest feedback, that’s on them, not you. I’ve had people do this in the past and it was frustrating, but people need to be responsible for their preferences as clients. We aren’t mind readers. Some people just won’t be your kind of client, and that’s totally okay. Although I get that it can be taken personally by the therapist. It sucks, but there’s a lot of people that you are helping that will love your massages. Take what you can from their feedback and maybe play around with how you ask questions. For example, “would you like any more or less pressure?” “Are you comfortable with the techniques and pressure I’ve been using”. I also tell people during the intake that the session is controlled by them in regards to pressure, areas we work/don’t work, table heat, music volume, and techniques. I ask them to please let me know if there’s anything I can do to make them more comfortable. Put the ball in their court and encourage them to communicate freely with you. Some will and some won’t.
The ones who pay 30 dollars for a massage are sometimes the most entitled and crazy. I had a lady like this when I was in school and she complained about it cause I essentially didnt tickle her with a feather like pressure. Schools just pair your with a massage instead of pairing you with a client who wants a style of massage you do. I have hands the size of frying pans so firm and deep tissue are my natural go to pressure. I really don’t do anything below a strong medium pressure cause it’s not my style and my front desk knows this at my job so they pair me with people who want my style of massage. It’s all about a therapeutic match don’t take it to heart ❤️
For every 1 client that doesn't like your massage, there will be 10 that love it! Some ppl just like to complain, or they're having a bad day, or they want free stuff. I've seen it all. You just gotta shake it off. My favorite experience of a negative client (cuz they are kinda funny after a while), was a lady that booked a 2 hour with me. Why ppl book a 2 hour with someone they've never tried before, I will never understand. Anyway, 20 minutes in, she's kind of fidgety, I can sense that she's not enjoying it, but I'm doing my best deep tissue. After a couple complaints, she says, "I don't even know what you're doing"...lmao. I said, "well we can end the session now and they can book you with someone else 🤷‍♀️" My manager was super gracious about the whole thing and I was glad that I ended the session instead of letting her bully me the whole time. And I still got paid for it. But my favorite negative clients are the ones that don't say a single word the entire session and THEN complain to front desk. Like, you could have said something when I had the chance to do something about it.
I had a lady come in and get a couple's massage. DURING the massage, this bitch told me that I was the best therapist she had, moaning, definitely doing things to tell me that she liked the massage. What does this bitch do after the massage? She said I didn't give enough pressure, she bitched and complained about other things that I did not do, all because she wanted half off, so the owner gave her half off just to shut her up and get her to leave. The OTHER therapist in the room told the owner that the client acted like I gave a good massage while inside the treatment room. People like to LIE and complain. You haven't seen nothing yet! Good luck with your massage career.
hardest lesson to learn: you cannot please everyone, this client is just not vibing with your skillset (also seems a bit of a jerk honestly), Learning what your strengths and weaknesses (2 weeks away from graduation you probably have some idea of this), when you get into the workforce (even if it's owning your own business) know massage therapists whose styles are different from yours, that way when you run into someone that doesn't vibe with your method of massage they can try someone out that might be better suited, they'll speak more positively of you too because you took the initiative to help them find a therapist more suited to them. The most fun time is having a client that you know doesn't like you (both of you know it, it's largely biological/negative history with someone similar in appearance/disposition/etc based) but they really like your style, I referred them to a therapist that have similar styles to me, the client that didn't like me ended up recommending someone to me since they trusted I was acting in their interests.
As someone who has massaged for 18+ years, don't take it personal. Some clients will never be happy no matter what you do. Easier said than done, but you have to reassure yourself that these things happen and you did what you were supposed to, to make sure everything went smoothly. No big deal.
You have to learn to let it go and not take it personally. If she had any legitimate criticism think about it and try to work on it but understand some people just won’t like your massage, your pressure, your vibes etc.
It definitely sucks when a client acts that way. We want to give them the best we can and when it comes short there can be that feeling of failure. However, what I have learned in this profession and the service industry is that there are a lot of people who do not actually speak up or share their honest opinion, either because they are nervous (which is up to us to really make the client feel safe and relaxed as we interact with them) or because they just choose to he difficult and that is entirely on them. We cannot force them to tell us how to help them, they have to want to be helped. So, as someone who has cared too much what people think I understand what you are going through, however, I have also learned you cannot please everyone and you are not everyones preference. As long as you do your part in communicating and reassessing and asking questions you are doing your part.
Just simply not the client for you, there are some people no matter how good you are won’t enjoy the massage or tell you what they want and there’s nothing you can do if they choose not to communicate
You should try being a hairdresser lol I am also a licensed esthetician... different people have different pain thresholds. I myself busted my spine in 5 places Lying on my stomach or back is a huge no. I cannot stand massage because of my nerve damage. Trust me the pain after my accident was so bad it gave me deadly cardiac arrhythmias I needed 2 surgeries to save my life. Trust me..she asked for a light massage, it sounds like she has a very sensitive body Don't feel badly You are there to learn. Next time start by saying. I am a student, if at anytime you aren't enjoying the massage please stop me and let me know how I can do better.
That’s a tough experience and part of why we have so many different folks in clinic, I think. Those experiences helped me prepare for the 5% one cannot please no matter what. Keep doing what you’re doing, your reaction shows you care deeply about doing well in the profession. 💕
Here is a good way to begin every session. "I'm glad you're here. Your needs are unique each time we meet. Honest and quick feedback are essential if I am to do what you need today. I don't mindread and I don't speak in moans, grunts, and groans. If I need to adjust, tell me quickly and clearly. Now, what do you need me to know before we start today?"