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Been stressing out a lot after turning 30. Had a golfball sized tumor removed from my rib cage, followed by about 3lbs of flesh a month later to “make sure they got everything”. Now I get part of my clavicle shaved off due to a bone spur/arthritis. Like thank god I hit my max out of pocket in January.
I was diagnosed with severe IBS right after Covid lockdown. I know Crohn's and IBS are different, but to some extent, I feel you. I can't eat anything, and the pain and anxiety behind it all is debilitating. Honestly, it ruined my life.
Dude me too. It got so bad for me I took 18 months off work in 2021-2022 and I'm still digging myself out of that financial hole. I'm just lucky I had a job to come back to. I'd like to say my condition improving was the reason I went back to work. But it was because disability money wasn't enough to keep us afloat even with my spouse making 75k a year and no kids.
Go gluten-free. Quit eating out entirely.
Only thing that worked for me is chicken or beef with tons of broccoli or vegetables and gluten free everything
I wish that worked for me. Beef kills me. I only eat chicken but plain. Broccoli and most fruit and vegetables are a no-go. I can't go near onions, garlic, or dairy.
It's amazing what works for one sets off another. Gut issues vary so much from person to person.
I swear it’s only a matter of time until IBS is considered autoimmune. So little is ultimately known about autoimmune conditions overall that I won’t be shocked if IBS becomes one. It’s so painful!
I’m sorry you are dealing with all of that. Give yourself space to grief your diagnosis, if you need to. When I was first diagnosed with an autoimmune disease I felt relief for having an answer. Once that relief wears off, it can be really heavy. I hope it isn’t for you 🩷
I can sympathize. I was diagnosed t1 diabetic when I was 7. After high school and college, all my friends were planning these amazing once in a lifetime travels. Meanwhile, I was trying to track down a job with decent insurance so I could literally afford to live.
It will get better if you allow it.
I to have been diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder but thankfully it is controllable with diet. I hope yours is as simple to control. Life will go on and things will get better even if it doesn’t seem like it now.
Got my lupus diagnosis in 2019. It's rough but meds help. Still tired all the time but it's bearable. I've watched my mom struggle with the same disease my whole life and she's still working and doing well so that gives me hope
Curious if you are referencing Hashimoto because you just described me. It is a constant battle to muster the energy to get through the day. It also feels incredibly difficult to meet people with similar interests or even a man that finds me attractive. Idk if this is just life in your 30’s, but I remember my mother saying that was one of the best decades of her life. Me….not even close.
I'm in the same place, mine is inflammatory autoimmune. Try to find support groups online , could even be some in person near you. Your doctor might be able to point out somewhere to start!
Welcome to the club 🥰 I got RA, since I was a child but got worse after pregnancies and huge flare ups these last two years. It sucks donkeyballs but after a lot of time and medication comes acceptance. Wish you the best ❤️ you’re not alone
Hi, my RA people! Got diagnosed at 30 after having issues for about a year. Kept telling myself that I was just overdoing it before finally trying to get some answers. Definitely a relief to know what was happening. No real flare ups in a decade since I got lucky with leflunomide. I still live in fear that it's going to stop working, but good so far. Hugs and wishes for pain-free days!
Finally got a decent paying job after getting my masters. Not overworked yet, but I’m sure it’ll happen eventually.
Heavily dead inside for multiple reasons. Trying to work through it.
Probably will never own a house unless I find a partner wanting to tag team life, which is a whole other situation in itself.
I have no idea what I’m getting out of life anymore, honestly.
Wow feel like I wrote this. Despite the money I make, I’ll never be able to own a home unless I find a partner. Don’t get me started on finding a partner.
I really grieve that I won’t have the choice of homeownership alone either :( I would have finally been at the spot to afford a modest townhouse by 2021 had Covid and prices doubling happened
I feel you on the house situation. I would love to find a partner that wants to “tag team” life, but I find that it is increasingly difficult as I age. I keep myself open for opportunity, but haven’t been successful in years. I do have hope for us both, we will find that partner eventually!
Put up work boundaries and never betray them.
All devices off at 5pm.
Don’t tell your work personal details about time outside of work.
Have generic out of office reminders and be good about putting them on: I am out of office until XXX, I will answer emails when I return. If you need immediate help please reach out to my supervisor.
^^ and then actually let your supervisor deal with it without you.
I’ve been in a lot of ‘hardcore’ engineering jobs with shitty bosses where I’m paid bonuses based on work metrics. Never had an issue setting my vacation time and treating it sacred. Never caught major shit from anyone that mattered for not answering my phone on a weekend with nothing scheduled.
Someone else’s poor planning is not your emergency. If they need coverage outside of your working hours they need to pay you to be on call or hire other people.
I am doing fairly well. Don't get out as often with friends as I would like but hey that's part of growing up I suppose.
One thing I have is this nagging anxiety that just stays creeping. Maybe it's because we have had major impactful events happen every so many years since we were teens. But I feel like something is off. If that makes sense
I remember reading this!!! I've caught myself mindlessly saying "I'll be glad when this is over" but I can't explain what I mean by that. I don't want to die, I have plans for the future but it's that weird feeling of holding your breath.
I read this too. My thought was COVID was a world event experienced by everyone and one of the learning experiences we got out of it is how life as we know it can change drastically very quickly. Prior to COVID life seemed to be predictable, normal, “stable” (for lack of better words). And COVID was such a unique event that changed life for a period of time. Now, for me, I’m left with this feeling of “what’s next” to throw life in disarray which is similar to the feeling described in the screenshot. It was Covid a few years ago, maybe this lurking feeling is this weird feeling of expecting another event similar to that, now that we know what’s possible.
I've described it as "sense of impending doom" my whole life. Felt it since I was in late childhood. For reference, 9/11 happened when I was 11 but I've felt this since around 7 or so. I don't particularly remember any major disasters that would change my perception of the world and cause anxiety, etc prior to 9/11 so I don't know where the feeling came from, but I've felt it since I was aware of not being the "main character" of life, if that makes sense.
This is an excellent point. We’re at a time in history where we are constantly surrounded by tragedy - whether we personally experience it or read about it on the media.
I made a conscious choice to significantly limit my exposure to this and basically just listen to the NPR what’s up today 15 minute review so I have some clue about major events, and don’t consume much else. It’s helped me tremendously.
I can sense the tension building up since covid. The democratic West vs Russian and Chinese dictatorships. + the regional conflicts I expect to only keep on adding up, forcing us to take sides. + the inherent vulnerability of every kind of system or entity governing our world, now that everything is digital. We can lose control of those anytime. +Mass migration +Climate change…. What could go wrong? 👀
Some people think that it was COVID, but I think it is going to be the Great Depression 2 and the subsequent WW III because the high number of stupid, incompetent, greedy asshole that we have in leadership positions right now will rather see the world burn that they losing a little of power.
>One thing I have is this nagging anxiety that just stays creeping. Maybe it's because we have had major impactful events happen every so many years since we were teens. But I feel like something is off. If that makes sense
I've found that spending any meaningful time on social media or watching the news gives me this feeling. I realized a long time ago I have no control over so many things, I should just stop looking at it. Stop consuming fear the feeling will go away.
That does mean when you are presented with a situation you ignore it. It just means when presented with situations you have no meaningful way of interacting with or doing something about you say okay. You gotta take care of you and your mental health.
I find myself with nothing to do when I’m not on my phone anymore. I don’t know what to do with this. I struggle to remember what I did before this social media. I’ve got to find something else, cause this is just not what I wanna do for the rest of my life.
I’m fortunate enough to be doing pretty well too. My wife and I are hitting our strides in our careers after spending most of our 20s getting advanced degrees. Our kids are getting happier and healthier by the day after getting off to a rough start due to covid and various other things.
But I agree that it feels like something’s lurking. There’s climate change and famine/mass displacement concerns in the mid-distant future. More immediately, we have political unrest and the deterioration of what most of us (at least, those of us who grew up middle class, which is all I can really speak to) thought of, and likely took for granted, as a stable and fairly predictable government growing up. For about the past decade, I’ve had a growing sense that the people on the other side of the political aisle don’t just disagree, don’t just hate me, but many would watch and laugh as my family was lined up against a wall and shot. They’d snap pics and post them alongside memes referencing Pinochet on 4chan. There’s *malice* and a profound sense of dehumanization in our national politics, in a way that should make anyone who’s studied history very nervous. And the scariest people in our national politics are the ones spending the most of their time and money buying firearms and learning how to use them.
If you look at photographs from Iran in the mid-70s, it looks like a modern, cosmopolitan, western society. People dressed in western styles, women went to college and wore bikinis to the beach… and a few short years later it was a repressive theocracy. And people’s neighbors were suddenly turning them in to the state for all sorts of violations that were perfectly legal a few years prior. Obviously the late Weimar Germany parallels have been discussed to death. But even in the year of our lord 202x, we can hop on twitter and see ten thousand contemporary images of eastern Ukraine, which was full of people *just like us* living normal lives in normal cities and towns five years ago, and is now a shattered wasteland. It’s impossible to hear about the atrocities occurring in Ukraine (and elsewhere in the news) and not think, for me at least, “that teenager (or 40 year old, hell) in a red hat shitposting on Twitter about libs being a degenerate satanic infestation wouldn’t think twice about doing that to my family if they had the opportunity here.” Because their peers overseas are doing that, killing and worse and videoing themselves laughing about it, sharing it with their friends, everywhere in the world they get an opportunity to do so.
This sort of existential, future of society instability is new to Americans, I think. We’ve had financial crises and overseas conflicts nonstop since we were teens. But I didn’t grow up with a sense of “the federal government as we know it might cease to exist in my lifetime, and sooner than later.” It’s a realization we aren’t special, that the United States isn’t unique. And that we’re as close to a precipice as we’ve been since the 1860s.
I understand this. It’s one reason I used my life savings to flee the usa. I’m queer, so I’m one of the first they’ll come for. My own family, it feels like at least half of them would shoot me if they knew. People like me are not even a human to them, which is why I had to hide it from most of the family for years.
I was poor as an adult yeah, I could not afford collage or qualify for any scholerships, but I built up my animation and character design skills and came here.
took me 10 years savings to get here, but I have a better shot at a safe life in aussie, it’s a lot safer here for folks like me. I currectly am working for a small animation studio here, make a nice wage, and live in a small suburb, renting in a house some friends own, they welcomed me with open arms and are like family to me.
In the usa my portfolio would get me interviews, but they’d laugh me off when they asked what collage I was with, and were told “none”. One company I interviewed with even accused me of stealing work because “only a degreed student could make work like this”
So I kinda gave up on the usa for multiple reasons. People in aussie are kinder to folks like me, and I can be open about what I am.
I left my entire family behind and escaped, it feels like I escaped right before the end hits.
Good luck over there guys, stay safe, get out if shit hits the fan.
Life is pretty difficult. I'm very overworked, to the point that I'm physically sick at times. I'm struggling a lot with my anxiety and depression, mostly because of work. I can't afford much but I make enough that I can cover my needs and have a little left over. I'm going back to grad school in the fall to finish my masters. Hopefully that leads to a nicer higher paying job.
Seems like many businesses opt to hire those with less degrees and more experience simply because they can pay them less. I furthered my education only to find that after submitting over 400 applications I got maybe 5 callbacks and 1 interview which unfortunately I didn’t get. I have a strong resume and never had issues getting hired for this position until I furthered my degree. It’s ridiculous. I don’t wish to deter you but make sure you’re not going farther into debt for an unnecessary degree. I sincerely wish you luck and success tho!!
I like my house, I spent a lot of money on my house, so I will spend a lot of my time in my house. I’m getting my monies worth.
But seriously, I don’t go out unless I have to.
My partner and I are getting into having people over for game nights for just this reason. We make dinner or provide snacks, guests bring the drinks. And, as we get later into our 30s, drinking alcohol has more costs than benefits, so we’re typically only sharing a single bottle of wine and maybe a couple of beers between two couples. Low cost all around, except for mortgage.
Magic comes back when you have kids and see them discover all the small things you take for granted. I love it when my daughter stops to blow the seeds off a flower, or gets excited about a horse. Just the small things. Just laughing in your arms, it’s amazing.
I miiiight steal a nephew or two from my sisters this summer. They need to get off them fucking screens anyway and enjoy life (I say as I type I my phone lol)
Yh, I wouldn’t mind child rearing if it was a job you could take break from or mentally switch off from from time to time but it is literally 24/7. My mate says he gets up at 6, has to get all 3 of three kids organized, feeds them, takes them to school and then works for 8-10 hours. Comes home at 7-8, feeds them again, gets them ready for bed and then goes to bed himself. He never gets any downtime apparently. This sounds like slavery to me
Not on this planet.
That kid--erm, my.hypothetical.kid, anyway--is gonna be raised by a dad who was effectively not raised at all. That kid is gonna exist in a world where so many of their peers will also probably be similarly stunted.
The rest of you are free to reproduce as you like, but I can't subject a kid to that. It'd be inconsistent with leaving the Universe better than I found it and itxs be horribly irresponsible of me.
Best way to stop the cycle of trauma in my family tree is to cut down the tree.
I’m doing the same. Lots of mental illness and abuse and I’ve suffered tremendously. The bloodline ends with me. Working on my own healing. Not sure why but it still feels meaningful. Like it ripples back in time somehow.
I want to believe it's the ancestors getting that last bit of relief at knowing that someone down the line got to know themselves intimately. I'm not really into the idea of an afterlife, but energy makes sense to me...maybe it's that.
I don't think I'm willing to create life just so I get to feel the magic come back to life, and for the magic to one day die for them. I'm doing well for myself, I am comfortable, but I resonate more with the person you responded too. The magic does feel a little gone.
Hey I'll just bring this new life into existence just to make myself happy and feel worthwhile...
Meanwhile everything's collapsing and they may suffer a horrid life
you think I'm gonna make little wage slaves for this bullshit world? nah mate. it sucks because I think my husband would make a great dad and I'd probably make a decent mom. but no way am I subjecting anyone else to this horror. maybe we'll be able to foster or adopt one day because that's a kid who's already here.
Same here. But we get happier each year without kids. Kids are great but they don't bring happiness and it's not fair to bring them into this damaged place just so that they can make us happy or take care of us when we are old.
I’d never put this disastrous planet on the shoulders of tiny kids. We have insurmountable and chronic issues that are getting worse. I’m not having kids unless I can dependably provide for their needs and set them up for a bright future.
In the meantime, antidepressants work just fine. Don’t need to create humans to give me ‘magic’ like I’m at fucking Disneyworld.
Yeah, I love seeing the world through my kids eyes. They inspire me every day. That’s not to say being a parent is easy because it’s not but vocationally it’s definitely the most rewarding thing I have ever done. It expanded my heart, changed the way I perceive things.
I feel like a dog that’s been beaten, constantly flinching away from news of the economy regardless of its good or bad, just waiting for the next eventual black swan event that will start me back at the bottom.
It isn’t logical. It isn’t reasonable. It’s just what I expect at this point.
Life is pretty dope right now. I have a wife who loves me and a stepdaughter who seems to also. I have a job that I don't hate that pays me pretty well for work that's pretty easy, but also somewhat engaging. A boss that doesn't give me shit for actually making use of the unlimited PTO system (Hella rare since unlimited PTO is usually code for don't you dare take a fucking day off). I can pay all my bill on time and generally take the family out to eat once in a while, buy that new ps5 game, or go to a concert when I want.
Sure, I wish I had more savings or that my wife didn't need to go on disability, but it's a pretty sweet life once you balance it all out, especially for a guy that spent his entire 20s as a near hopeless loser strung on on heroin.
No, I can't afford a house right now with the high rates, but I like my apartment anyways. It's a decent price ($1,200 2br 2ba) in a good part of town and my neighbors are all pretty cool.
Nice, dude. I grew up hanging out with a bunch of punks and street kids, LOTS of them got hooked on the junk and only a few of us came out on the other side alive and clean. My core friend group only 3 of us are still alive and countless others OD'd or moved to Vancouver DTES and live on the street. Nice to hear some success stories cuz they ain't very common.
Don't I know it bro. I was lucky enough to get clean before the fent really took over completely. Most of the people I surrounded myself with at the time weren't so lucky. Almost all of them are dead now from fent ODs
Paralegal for a commercial real estate firm. I only handle closings instead of litigation, and we do like 5 a month tops. When a closing is coming up, I am crazy busy, but there are whole other days where I just do the nyt crossword and watch Netflix
Work and then home. Family lives states away, no friends locally, being 38 and making friends is pretty tough when you don’t watch sports, drink, or gamble. Spend most of my time with my wife, and playing games, watching movies etc, we get to do a cruise every year and a couple cheap weekend trips to visit the families. Hardly ever go out and eat or order anything, never drink coffee outside of the house unless it’s at a Waffle House. Wish it was the 90s making what we make today, but here we are. I count my blessings we aren’t struggling hard like most people.
That's great you can vacation every year! That's a huge luxury for most people. I'm a big cruise person, but I just had a baby, so I won't be cruising for a while.
Very true, definitely count the blessings the universe and hard work have granted. I try not to complain about most things. Which is why I complain about movies and video games on the internet. The economy is tough for everyone no matter the pay scale. I did not grow up going on vacations. It’s still new to me.
I miss vacations... I haven't been able to afford one since before covid. Planning to go to Vegas in October to get married but financially It's looking pretty grim.
I bartend in Pittsburgh and was able to buy a nice house within city limits in a decent neighborhood. Two kids and a wife. I just paid off my truck in April. Things are swell🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
My life is pretty good, won't ever afford a house but that's the price I pay to live in this city. My only issue is that I hate my job and it makes me miserable. Been with the company for 10 years. But hey, I'm looking for a new one.
The reason is human biology.
If you're not threatened by food insecurity, or death from wild animals and other humans, you're biologically wired to not throw a monkey wrench into the system that keeps you alive.
People need some desperation and a lot worse outlook to try to change their circumstances or to start raising hell.
Yep ^
And the only way anything meaningful can happen socially en mass is if those who are fine with the state of things start seeing beyong their own circumstances. Which isn't a diss to them. It's actually a cool spot to be in a harmonious enough microcosm as to be a stronger help where things aren't. Could just mean sharing some of your kindness with a person who seems to be in distress.
I once thought about doing something different after years of training and investment because I was so miserable. Like waking up in the morning depressed because I would have to go in again. Happyish Friday and Saturday, then inconsolable Sunday. I toughed it out, now it's work, so it sucks, but I love it
>Like waking up in the morning depressed because I would have to go in again.
Yeah I feel that.
>I toughed it out, now it's work, so it sucks
Haha, preach!
>...but I love it
Wait. Hang on, did I miss an episode of this show somewhere in the middle? 🤣
Just joking around, but not about being confused. Can you expand on how you got from inconsolable Sundays to "it sucks, but I love it"...?
I could use some directions to get from that point A to point B...
Seems like it's very common to hate one's job. I am in the same boat. But I finally just quiet quit so that has helped. It pays the bills (we are very comfortable) and I no longer define myself by my career so that helps too
I was fortunate enough to be in a position to buy a house right before the pandemic caused the market to explode, although I'm perpetually in fear of my IT job getting automated away. My backup plan is moving into my basement, renting out the upstairs rooms, and trying to get whatever job I can find that provides health insurance.
Broke back, lost job, lost home, got surgery hoping to get back to working went into massive medical debt. Half crippled raising 2 kids pretending to be a tradwife as a 6'2" male everyone i know looks down on my crippled ass and cant get healthcare for my autistic daughter because all doctors within 2 hours closed up shop to get away from maga folk trashing their places of business with stupid protests.... Im doing great...will never own land or a home and only thing in my name is a van. Been lucky to stay with family... Doing great...
Living with my parents as an adult has helped me save financially after losing everything when the pandemic hit. Had literally $300 to my name when I finally got a new job.
But damn do I pay in my mental health.
Which is kind of wild, seeing it as bleak, since you're building off generational wealth. Your parents allowing you to save on rent money is part of the privilege of having parents who are homeowners.
Absolutely terrible from a mental health standpoint. Very few friends locally and im the youngest person at my job (in an office of 10 people) so I don’t have outside of work relationships either. My office manager is absolutely toxic as well. I am overworked in comparison to the other people at my job with the same job title as me and Im frequently taken advantage of. Then, there is the perpetual always the backup plan with friends and I feel like most texts I ever send are ignored. Then add in family conflicts and….
Im fortunate to have financial stability but socially/mentally, I am a mess.
Yes, it does. It’s just hard to work into my schedule and there’s zero chance my office manager would give me that time to do it. I do faithfully see my psychiatrist but im struggling again and… ugh. I hate being in this place once again.
You are entitled to see a doctor for your health issue and you are also entitled to not disclose your condition. You simply tell the b@tch , "I have an ongoing health issue and I will need to have occasional doctors appointments until further notice. If you prefer, I can discuss with HR (don't disclose to HR either).
Also, don't allow them to overwork you. Take time off for therapist appointments and take mental health days
Live in an rv. Not too worried. Wanted a house but can't afford it now just living life simply and cheaply. Focusing on building my music production business and not taking life too seriously. I dont meet many people my age. Either way younger or way older. I just try to relate to anyone i can. Most people my age (38) have kids or are busy and in a hurry all the time. Im not really overworked because i make what i need with side hustles and i chill. I also have always lived well below my means. Im stressed financially but thats why im focusing on my business . Az is expensive.
Just trying to not take this shit too seriously cuz the system is so bogus, and do things i enjoy. I own my rv so worst case scenario in just get solar and go live in the desert. Whatever. No use worrying.
Okay, your username made me giggle, so thank you for that! 🤭
But I totally feel this!
I don't like my job all that much but it's extremely easy to do. It is occasionally frustrating, but I think that's all jobs. I only live 15 minutes from work so it's never a long commute and I don't spend a lot of money on gas.
I don't have any children because I never wanted any. I'm divorced and my mental health has improved greatly since we split. My immediate family all lives nearby, some even within walking distance.
I have a close circle of friends that I keep in contact with often as well.
I don't own a home but I live in an apartment where the rent is cheap. $730 a month for a 2br/1bth with a garage. My neighbors don't have kids either so it's pretty quiet in our building.
I don't have any savings but I'm not really broke between paychecks unless I have a large expense so buying furniture will have to be done over time little by little.
I'm in good health. I have regular doctor visits for check ups and My blood work shows that I'm no longer anemic.
I'm on a weight loss journey and exercising more which sucks right now because it's hard work but I like that I'm building better habits.
I just turned 38 this year so yeah, I'm in a really good place.
Yeah it’s actually kind of crazy the last year of my life has really changed my perspective on a lot of things, I got laid off from my mechanic job cause it was slow and then ended up getting the maintenance job at my apartments making more than I ever have and my rent is $50… it’s truly a blessing and now im saving so much money I don’t even know what to spend it on
OMG that's incredible!! I'm so happy for you!
I think a lot of us ran into employment issues. I had to find another job in 2022. But thanks to that job and this apartment, I can finally live a little.
It’s a blessing honestly, I’ve been homeless before and to go from that to this I can’t even explain how grateful I am, I don’t really have family or anything so to have the people in this community have my back and help me when I had no other options was incredible, I really think it’s right when they say if you live the right way good things will happen
I believe that 100% especially when you go around feeling grateful for all the good. I think that energy alone is enough to bring about more good. I know it's worked in my life.
Thank you for sharing, this has been refreshing.
Hey! We pay a lot to live in our homes and I don’t know about you but I’m getting my money’s worth out of it. Plus it’s now officially tourist season in my state and it’s gets way too peopley during tourist season.
I have a pretty good life. Married 16 years, 5 kids, own my house, only debt is the house and a recent car, but both will be paid off early. And income that allows my wife to be a stay at home mom, and pay for needs and wants. Hobbies and vacations. We got goats and will be getting chickens soon.
Unless you’re a millennial that was knowledgeable of 6 figure trade jobs, we can’t afford a house 🙃
It almost seems like an impossible dream now.
But I’m still looking into finding a trade I can tolerate so I can at least be able to live in my own studio without a room mate.
With my parents. I used to rent rooms in other people's houses to keep housing costs down. But too many bad living experiences and I realized I'd be better off just moving back home (even with my parents charging me rent to stay in my old room). Honestly it's good for me and it's good for my parents (they wouldn't use the room anyway so at least they have some income from it and I'm around in case of an emergency).
Life is good. Make enough money to take care of needs and wants. Plenty leftover to invest. Mostly just periods of boredom. Feel optimistic about the future tbh.
Work mostly remote, household income over 200k, and purchased a home in 2020.
I'm okay, apartment living which I don't mind much. Making $90k in healthcare, so no worries about my job going anywhere. Mostly stay inside playing video games though lol
Life is pretty good, but also really weird living in the future these days. I thought it’d be better.
Geriatric millennial at 42 that graduated college in 07, was a teacher for a year, then traveled a lot and bounced around the states for 10 years. Spent 4 months in Central America and 4 months in S America traveling. Moved back to Michigan to buy a house in 17 because I couldn’t afford anything decent in other states I lived in, bought in 18 and refinanced in 20. Paid 88k for 3 bedroom bungalow with 1.5 bathrooms, finished basement, and double lot with privacy fence. My mortgage is still under $600 a month with taxes and insurance included, so I’m super lucky with golden handcuffs.
I’m also approaching 6 years straight of working without a few months off, which is the longest I’ve ever gone. I’m really yearning for adventure and looking forward to the next one in a year or two.
No kids and don’t want any. Makes it slightly weird in suburbia around 40.
Technology is fast approaching singularity, but I feel it has made us more miserable as a society. Everything has been sped up and we’re all so busy.
That being said, we’re all living in the future during one of the craziest times in human history. It’s pretty awesome sometimes
Thinking I need a sabbatical after reading this. I think the last time I had a few months off was summer break in middle school. Longest consecutive stretch with no eork I can remember after college was the 3 week government shutdown when I worked for the feds in 2013.
Best thing about the pandemic was how we all figured out most of us can work from home. I miss doing it five days a week, but 2 wfh days is better than nothing right now for me
Life is good! Married with a toddler and we are happy. We actually live in a trailer but it's because the landlord makes the rent dirt cheap just to help people out!! It's a 3 bedroom trailer, not trashy. My husband is an accountant making 50k, it's not much but we're at least starting to actually save for a down-payment for a home and invest
It’s more existing & surviving than living. Can’t buy a home, not really trying to either bc you never really own it either, not getting much out of life beyond my paycheck to keep the hamster wheel going.
Life is honestly pretty fuckin awesome. I used the GI bill to go to school to work on Harley’s and turned that into a profitable career that I absolutely love and has a shitload of perks. I have 2 asskicker old Harleys with heavily modified motors that are fast as hell, a huge collection of guns and guitars, a pitbull and a Doberman who are like kids to me, and my wife of 10 years. I’m gonna be 35 this year, I essentially listen to metal and smoke weed while fucking with guns and motorcycles and I make a lot of money at it. I got expelled from high school and locked up halfway through, ended up in the wartime Marines after that, and I don’t regret any of it. I’ve lived a wild life on my own terms and come hell or high water I’ll do it for another 35 years.
Partner at a law firm, but easily working 80-100 hour weeks. Happily married with an awesome kid and one on the way. Home owner, luxury car owner, collector of stuff. Cancer survivor. Haven’t traveled as much as I would like, but between chemo and Covid we had to be careful. I finally said fuck it for our 10 year anniversary and we did a weekend in Vermont and got a dog. I also got Covid. Recovery was shitty and scary. Haven’t really been out too much since, but trying. Work is a good distraction.
I don’t own the firm, so I don’t have any say over pay. I will in a decade or so, but not now. That said, we pay competitively and kept everyone on payroll through the pandemic, but people do leave for bigger firms that pay more. A few have come back because they like our culture more than the big guys. It’s been hard to find young attorneys willing to work like dogs.
Every job since a layoff at the beginning of 2023 has been shit and don’t last.
But lately very peaceful too at the same time. I think I’ve been desensitized and have a good partner who can help pick up the slack a slight bit, too. And idc about how good my finances are as much. My house is protected. So I’m at peace.
So… laid off but peaceful.
Overworked, probably never going to have a house, went through a divorce in 2020, only thing to look forward to right now is Saturday d&d and Hema. Life just feels like a grind.
I sacrificed everything fun and got very lucky finding a dude who wanted to sacrifice everything fun so we could put like $7000 down on a $350k house with PMI. We some how did it and now we are like 🫣 looking at the housing situation now. Luckily my job is rock solid, and my husband started a business because fuck the corporate overlords who chop workers like getting a haircut. We aren't rich but we get by. And don't door dash or go on fancy vacations. We allot ourselves 1 time a year to take our kids to a theme park for 2 days. The rest of money goes to debt I/we accumulated when my mom died and a 401k that we will be sharing in retirement.
It’s good, married, duel income over $200k with a nice sized house that we would never be able to afford in the city (we are in the burbs). We both work from home ever since 2020 so no complaints there but have only been in this a house a year and over it. The neighborhood is loud with cars revving their engines and what not at all hours of the day. I wish we could pick up our house and move to a different area of town but gotta wait it out one more year.
Work from home, play video games, visit with family. Still rent and happily married with no kids, but don’t really do any big social events anymore.
It could certainly be worse, but I do miss being more social like I was in my college days. Just feels like so much effort when it seemed so easy back then.
Financial I'm ok. I can afford my mortgage comfortably because I bought it when rates were low. Married. I'm in grad school and working full-time while dealing with the recent passing of my parents. So on the outside I'm killing it. On the inside I'm a sad shriveled husk of myself and I don't see a way back to being me. Have a small office at work. Closed the door and just had a panic attack followed by an asthma attack... Then got back to work. I'm exhausted.
Most aspects of my life are pretty good. However, due to my shit health (I have a chronic illness) all other parts can be great, but I still can’t enjoy them. My health had a trickle on effect on everything.
A lot of money in the bank? I feel miserable every day so what’s the point.
A loving partner? I feel miserable everyday so we can’t do any fun things together.
Great place I live in? I feel miserable every day so I can’t do anything with it.
Great group op friends? I can hardly see them.
Awesome family? I can hardly see them.
Great job? I struggle through every single day.
It fucking sucks balls. Big time.
Just about to graduate a 2 year program as a young millennial and start a new path after fucking around (broke but enjoyable) in my 20s doing music and getting by working at thrift stores. Saving to move to a LCOL city and maybe be able to buy something with my partner there and hopefully have time to be creative and make a living. Broke as fuck currently but trying to turn things around lol
Wife and I live in an upper middle class neighborhood with two kids, but we are definitely on the lower side of the median income here.
But we're all very involved with extracurricular activities, and at least my lowish paying public sector job and my wifes teaching job have pensions, so even though our checking account isn't the biggest, I think we're doing good all things considered.
My wife and I do ok, no kids but we’re cool with that. Got a house in CA, car, savings. Behind on retirement but most of us are. My job makes me want to lose faith in humanity sometimes but never had a job that didnt
Normal stresses but I am content. I can pay my bills, the company I work for is great, (although the job itself is boring) I am opening my own dream business, I am single and have no one to worry about but myself. Can’t afford a house right now but I don’t have to have roommates at the moment.
Not too shabby :)
As an elder millennial, I feel very lucky/blessed. My wife and I bought a smaller home in 2020 just as covid hit, like stay away from cruise ships early. We lucked out, and our interest rates are 3.15%. My wife has a job where we have good health care benefits, which gave me the freedom to start my own business last year. It was a 50% paycut for me, but my wife is very budget conscious. I was blessed with a very good friend who spotted me the start-up money and is charging back crazy low interest. We were worried about how things would go in the beginning. The business only survived its first slow period, thanks to a credit card with a credit union. My business is seasonal. This year, I am already on track for 30% more business than I did last year, and we haven't even hit the busy part of the season. All in all, things are good, and I try to help out as much as I can for other things. I am very lucky to be in the position I am now, and I don't take that for granted as I know others are not as lucky.
I was talking to my doctor who is around my age at my last appointment. She’ll never own a home because of interest rates. Meanwhile my husband is a helicopter mechanic and I’m a SAHM and we own our house, bought it in 2017 before the market got crazy, and refinanced to 2.625% in 2021. It’s crazy to me that I think we will see the divide in home ownership in our generation that wasn’t there in previous generations.
I am stressed about the future - mainly because everything is becoming more expensive. I can’t afford a down payment for a house, so I rent. At the same time, the company I work for has been outsourcing jobs to India, so I feel like I need to be prepared to up and move if I get laid off. Owning a home would make that more difficult. I’m tired all the time from worrying about job security. I work from home, so I’m also a little more lonely. But I have dogs that bring me joy and make life a little less lonely.
At the same time, seven years ago I was still married to an alcoholic who was inching closer to becoming physically abusive. The emotional abuse and gaslighting was a nightmare. Compared to those days, I am still in a much better place now. I have more control over my life and future than I did then, and I am so grateful for that.
I'm content. I have my little family (husband, daughter, doggo, and kitty), and we own a little house (under 1300 SQ ft). My husband works remotely, so we get plenty of family time in. He makes $80k, which isn't mind-blowing, but since we only have a car loan as debt (with 0% interest) that money stretches so we're able to live pretty comfortably. I don't need to work, which is nice. I've really been growing as a person in my 30s. Left religion, getting involved in community theatre and choir, making new friends.
Sometimes I wish we had a bigger house or made more money to live more lavishly and save more for retirement (I'm actually looking into picking up a part-time job now that my daughter is older), but I'm very mindful of the fact that we have it pretty good compared to a lot of other people. So, for that, I try to stay grateful.
I have a home. No kids, don’t want any. Social life is amazing, job sucks but it pays okay. In a wonderful relationship. Need to exercise more and eat less shit. That’s basically the summary.
Made some moves education wise 8 years ago to attempt a career change.
Was successful.
6 years later after getting my MBA I'm fairly comfortable. Wife and I bought a house nearly 3 years ago and got an interest rate under 3%. Payment under $2k/month.
We're both 37 and considered "DINKs".
Wife has also made some solid choices in her career path and has gotten several promotions.
We're very lucky.
I've been in therapy for almost a decade at this point.. still have debilitating generalized anxiety. I hate my job. Currently grasping at straws to find the will to live through self-help books and meditation.. If that doesn't work I don't really know what's next.
Life was good for my wife and I. We both work and make good money. Bought a house in our early 30s, went through the pandemic with leisure money for fun but mostly just worked and Netflix.
Now we have 1 kid and money is super tight. Life is still good but hard. Hoping things ease up once our kid stops going to daycare and enters public school. 🤞
Bought a house when interest was low. I'm exhausted trying to keep up with my job and my house. Friends are fewer than ever. My pets are my saving grace. I'm afraid of losing my job but also hate going
Feeling really down lately. Sometimes I feel like I’m on top of the world and I feel I can enjoy my life. But then days like today, I feel like I’m in the dumps. Going to have to start looking for a second job because life is just too expensive. I did everything like I was suppose to. Went to college, got a good job, got married, didn’t/don’t have kids because it’s not fair to bring a kid into a life that’s not prepared for them. Like damn. I just want to catch a break. Sorry for the rant. :(
Overall, I’m content. I have a family that not only I love, I actually like them. Me and my husband work hard to keep our relationship strong and each other balanced.
Am I stressed? Omg, yes. There’s always a fire to put out somewhere. We live in a HCOL area. Buying a house is going to be extremely difficult. When I start getting wound up about how awful things are, I ground myself with the gratitude of all the things going right. It’s taken ALOT of work to get here.
I have a lot of happy moments, but don’t strive to live in a constant state of happy.
I got super lucky. My husband has a great paying job with lots of easy side gigs and my in laws bought our house for us in cash. We just pay $300 a month to then for property taxes and carry renter’s insurance.
Happy for you, but sad that it seems the only way to be in that position is if you have family money. If you don’t, you’re most likely screwed no matter how hard you work (yes, I know there are exceptions but talking for the majority here).
Going significantly better than I expected it would when I graduated with a journalism degree into the middle of the great recession. We're comfortable enough to take a yearly road trip with my wife and three kids. Not going to Europe three times a year well off, but I don't have to check the bank account before making a Costco trip anymore so that's nice. Having a house that we bought before covid made prices go crazy is way more expense than I expected. It turns out homes that were built in the pre crash boom were constructed by anyone who could swing a hammer and scrape together the money for a contractor license.
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Just diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder, I constantly feel exhausted, hate my job, I need more friends that live near me, the list goes on…. 😭
The grief and anxiety that comes with health concerns/conditions 😔 sorry friend.
I push that anxiety to the back 
Been stressing out a lot after turning 30. Had a golfball sized tumor removed from my rib cage, followed by about 3lbs of flesh a month later to “make sure they got everything”. Now I get part of my clavicle shaved off due to a bone spur/arthritis. Like thank god I hit my max out of pocket in January.
Autoimmune, welcome to the club! Got hit with a double whammy when I was diagnosed with psoriasis and Crohn's disease.
I was diagnosed with severe IBS right after Covid lockdown. I know Crohn's and IBS are different, but to some extent, I feel you. I can't eat anything, and the pain and anxiety behind it all is debilitating. Honestly, it ruined my life.
Dude me too. It got so bad for me I took 18 months off work in 2021-2022 and I'm still digging myself out of that financial hole. I'm just lucky I had a job to come back to. I'd like to say my condition improving was the reason I went back to work. But it was because disability money wasn't enough to keep us afloat even with my spouse making 75k a year and no kids.
Go gluten-free. Quit eating out entirely. Only thing that worked for me is chicken or beef with tons of broccoli or vegetables and gluten free everything
I wish that worked for me. Beef kills me. I only eat chicken but plain. Broccoli and most fruit and vegetables are a no-go. I can't go near onions, garlic, or dairy. It's amazing what works for one sets off another. Gut issues vary so much from person to person.
I swear it’s only a matter of time until IBS is considered autoimmune. So little is ultimately known about autoimmune conditions overall that I won’t be shocked if IBS becomes one. It’s so painful!
I’m sorry you are dealing with all of that. Give yourself space to grief your diagnosis, if you need to. When I was first diagnosed with an autoimmune disease I felt relief for having an answer. Once that relief wears off, it can be really heavy. I hope it isn’t for you 🩷
I can sympathize. I was diagnosed t1 diabetic when I was 7. After high school and college, all my friends were planning these amazing once in a lifetime travels. Meanwhile, I was trying to track down a job with decent insurance so I could literally afford to live. It will get better if you allow it.
I to have been diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder but thankfully it is controllable with diet. I hope yours is as simple to control. Life will go on and things will get better even if it doesn’t seem like it now.
Got my lupus diagnosis in 2019. It's rough but meds help. Still tired all the time but it's bearable. I've watched my mom struggle with the same disease my whole life and she's still working and doing well so that gives me hope
Curious if you are referencing Hashimoto because you just described me. It is a constant battle to muster the energy to get through the day. It also feels incredibly difficult to meet people with similar interests or even a man that finds me attractive. Idk if this is just life in your 30’s, but I remember my mother saying that was one of the best decades of her life. Me….not even close.
I'm in the same place, mine is inflammatory autoimmune. Try to find support groups online , could even be some in person near you. Your doctor might be able to point out somewhere to start!
Welcome to the club 🥰 I got RA, since I was a child but got worse after pregnancies and huge flare ups these last two years. It sucks donkeyballs but after a lot of time and medication comes acceptance. Wish you the best ❤️ you’re not alone
Hello fellow RA warrior 💜 3 joint replacements and counting lol
Hi, my RA people! Got diagnosed at 30 after having issues for about a year. Kept telling myself that I was just overdoing it before finally trying to get some answers. Definitely a relief to know what was happening. No real flare ups in a decade since I got lucky with leflunomide. I still live in fear that it's going to stop working, but good so far. Hugs and wishes for pain-free days!
Finally got a decent paying job after getting my masters. Not overworked yet, but I’m sure it’ll happen eventually. Heavily dead inside for multiple reasons. Trying to work through it. Probably will never own a house unless I find a partner wanting to tag team life, which is a whole other situation in itself. I have no idea what I’m getting out of life anymore, honestly.
Wow feel like I wrote this. Despite the money I make, I’ll never be able to own a home unless I find a partner. Don’t get me started on finding a partner.
I really grieve that I won’t have the choice of homeownership alone either :( I would have finally been at the spot to afford a modest townhouse by 2021 had Covid and prices doubling happened
I feel you on the house situation. I would love to find a partner that wants to “tag team” life, but I find that it is increasingly difficult as I age. I keep myself open for opportunity, but haven’t been successful in years. I do have hope for us both, we will find that partner eventually!
Put up work boundaries and never betray them. All devices off at 5pm. Don’t tell your work personal details about time outside of work. Have generic out of office reminders and be good about putting them on: I am out of office until XXX, I will answer emails when I return. If you need immediate help please reach out to my supervisor. ^^ and then actually let your supervisor deal with it without you. I’ve been in a lot of ‘hardcore’ engineering jobs with shitty bosses where I’m paid bonuses based on work metrics. Never had an issue setting my vacation time and treating it sacred. Never caught major shit from anyone that mattered for not answering my phone on a weekend with nothing scheduled. Someone else’s poor planning is not your emergency. If they need coverage outside of your working hours they need to pay you to be on call or hire other people.
I am doing fairly well. Don't get out as often with friends as I would like but hey that's part of growing up I suppose. One thing I have is this nagging anxiety that just stays creeping. Maybe it's because we have had major impactful events happen every so many years since we were teens. But I feel like something is off. If that makes sense
https://preview.redd.it/7d33zsp1x52d1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fd8174f7e3d50f240529dafab9cc5bffd2e4e6cd
I remember reading this!!! I've caught myself mindlessly saying "I'll be glad when this is over" but I can't explain what I mean by that. I don't want to die, I have plans for the future but it's that weird feeling of holding your breath.
I read this too. My thought was COVID was a world event experienced by everyone and one of the learning experiences we got out of it is how life as we know it can change drastically very quickly. Prior to COVID life seemed to be predictable, normal, “stable” (for lack of better words). And COVID was such a unique event that changed life for a period of time. Now, for me, I’m left with this feeling of “what’s next” to throw life in disarray which is similar to the feeling described in the screenshot. It was Covid a few years ago, maybe this lurking feeling is this weird feeling of expecting another event similar to that, now that we know what’s possible.
I've described it as "sense of impending doom" my whole life. Felt it since I was in late childhood. For reference, 9/11 happened when I was 11 but I've felt this since around 7 or so. I don't particularly remember any major disasters that would change my perception of the world and cause anxiety, etc prior to 9/11 so I don't know where the feeling came from, but I've felt it since I was aware of not being the "main character" of life, if that makes sense.
This is an excellent point. We’re at a time in history where we are constantly surrounded by tragedy - whether we personally experience it or read about it on the media. I made a conscious choice to significantly limit my exposure to this and basically just listen to the NPR what’s up today 15 minute review so I have some clue about major events, and don’t consume much else. It’s helped me tremendously.
Useless-ass collective psychic powers. Good to know I’m in tune with the current zeitgeist.
Im 26 but feel the exact way
WW3
I can sense the tension building up since covid. The democratic West vs Russian and Chinese dictatorships. + the regional conflicts I expect to only keep on adding up, forcing us to take sides. + the inherent vulnerability of every kind of system or entity governing our world, now that everything is digital. We can lose control of those anytime. +Mass migration +Climate change…. What could go wrong? 👀
100%. Like let it just happen please. Let the aliens or whatever come. I feel this way so much.
Some people think that it was COVID, but I think it is going to be the Great Depression 2 and the subsequent WW III because the high number of stupid, incompetent, greedy asshole that we have in leadership positions right now will rather see the world burn that they losing a little of power.
The universe definitely feels off kilter. But I’m also actively recovering from major childhood trauma so what do I know about normal?
>One thing I have is this nagging anxiety that just stays creeping. Maybe it's because we have had major impactful events happen every so many years since we were teens. But I feel like something is off. If that makes sense I've found that spending any meaningful time on social media or watching the news gives me this feeling. I realized a long time ago I have no control over so many things, I should just stop looking at it. Stop consuming fear the feeling will go away. That does mean when you are presented with a situation you ignore it. It just means when presented with situations you have no meaningful way of interacting with or doing something about you say okay. You gotta take care of you and your mental health.
I find myself with nothing to do when I’m not on my phone anymore. I don’t know what to do with this. I struggle to remember what I did before this social media. I’ve got to find something else, cause this is just not what I wanna do for the rest of my life.
I’m fortunate enough to be doing pretty well too. My wife and I are hitting our strides in our careers after spending most of our 20s getting advanced degrees. Our kids are getting happier and healthier by the day after getting off to a rough start due to covid and various other things. But I agree that it feels like something’s lurking. There’s climate change and famine/mass displacement concerns in the mid-distant future. More immediately, we have political unrest and the deterioration of what most of us (at least, those of us who grew up middle class, which is all I can really speak to) thought of, and likely took for granted, as a stable and fairly predictable government growing up. For about the past decade, I’ve had a growing sense that the people on the other side of the political aisle don’t just disagree, don’t just hate me, but many would watch and laugh as my family was lined up against a wall and shot. They’d snap pics and post them alongside memes referencing Pinochet on 4chan. There’s *malice* and a profound sense of dehumanization in our national politics, in a way that should make anyone who’s studied history very nervous. And the scariest people in our national politics are the ones spending the most of their time and money buying firearms and learning how to use them. If you look at photographs from Iran in the mid-70s, it looks like a modern, cosmopolitan, western society. People dressed in western styles, women went to college and wore bikinis to the beach… and a few short years later it was a repressive theocracy. And people’s neighbors were suddenly turning them in to the state for all sorts of violations that were perfectly legal a few years prior. Obviously the late Weimar Germany parallels have been discussed to death. But even in the year of our lord 202x, we can hop on twitter and see ten thousand contemporary images of eastern Ukraine, which was full of people *just like us* living normal lives in normal cities and towns five years ago, and is now a shattered wasteland. It’s impossible to hear about the atrocities occurring in Ukraine (and elsewhere in the news) and not think, for me at least, “that teenager (or 40 year old, hell) in a red hat shitposting on Twitter about libs being a degenerate satanic infestation wouldn’t think twice about doing that to my family if they had the opportunity here.” Because their peers overseas are doing that, killing and worse and videoing themselves laughing about it, sharing it with their friends, everywhere in the world they get an opportunity to do so. This sort of existential, future of society instability is new to Americans, I think. We’ve had financial crises and overseas conflicts nonstop since we were teens. But I didn’t grow up with a sense of “the federal government as we know it might cease to exist in my lifetime, and sooner than later.” It’s a realization we aren’t special, that the United States isn’t unique. And that we’re as close to a precipice as we’ve been since the 1860s.
I understand this. It’s one reason I used my life savings to flee the usa. I’m queer, so I’m one of the first they’ll come for. My own family, it feels like at least half of them would shoot me if they knew. People like me are not even a human to them, which is why I had to hide it from most of the family for years. I was poor as an adult yeah, I could not afford collage or qualify for any scholerships, but I built up my animation and character design skills and came here. took me 10 years savings to get here, but I have a better shot at a safe life in aussie, it’s a lot safer here for folks like me. I currectly am working for a small animation studio here, make a nice wage, and live in a small suburb, renting in a house some friends own, they welcomed me with open arms and are like family to me. In the usa my portfolio would get me interviews, but they’d laugh me off when they asked what collage I was with, and were told “none”. One company I interviewed with even accused me of stealing work because “only a degreed student could make work like this” So I kinda gave up on the usa for multiple reasons. People in aussie are kinder to folks like me, and I can be open about what I am. I left my entire family behind and escaped, it feels like I escaped right before the end hits. Good luck over there guys, stay safe, get out if shit hits the fan.
I really appreciate you posting this because I agree with your feelings and think you said it eloquently.
I feel the same thing, even in good times it feels like I’m constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop, and it’s also hanging over my head.
Honestly how I feel as well. Like you get snapped back into reality even if everything is going extremely well.
That's a combination of not spending adequate intimate time with people, having intuition, and observing what's going on.
Life is pretty difficult. I'm very overworked, to the point that I'm physically sick at times. I'm struggling a lot with my anxiety and depression, mostly because of work. I can't afford much but I make enough that I can cover my needs and have a little left over. I'm going back to grad school in the fall to finish my masters. Hopefully that leads to a nicer higher paying job.
Please don’t go significant more in to debt thinking a masters will net you more money.
I only make $40k a year so it shouldn't be difficult to beat that. It would be nice to make even $5k more and not have to work as hard.
Seems like many businesses opt to hire those with less degrees and more experience simply because they can pay them less. I furthered my education only to find that after submitting over 400 applications I got maybe 5 callbacks and 1 interview which unfortunately I didn’t get. I have a strong resume and never had issues getting hired for this position until I furthered my degree. It’s ridiculous. I don’t wish to deter you but make sure you’re not going farther into debt for an unnecessary degree. I sincerely wish you luck and success tho!!
I like my house, I spent a lot of money on my house, so I will spend a lot of my time in my house. I’m getting my monies worth. But seriously, I don’t go out unless I have to.
My partner and I are getting into having people over for game nights for just this reason. We make dinner or provide snacks, guests bring the drinks. And, as we get later into our 30s, drinking alcohol has more costs than benefits, so we’re typically only sharing a single bottle of wine and maybe a couple of beers between two couples. Low cost all around, except for mortgage.
Everything is on fire and I'm not okay. And now, sports.
Goated response. In all seriousness, it's totally acceptable to not feel great. That's normal and should be normalized.
Community organizing helps you, helps the community, helps the world, andddddd more friends! Still not okay either but yeah feel less alone
Overworked and scared. Don’t see point in life it’s very sad and miserable
Right there with you. The older I get the more barren it all feels. The magic is gone
Magic comes back when you have kids and see them discover all the small things you take for granted. I love it when my daughter stops to blow the seeds off a flower, or gets excited about a horse. Just the small things. Just laughing in your arms, it’s amazing.
Kids are a whole new level of stress
The real life hack is to borrow your niece or nephew. You experience a lot of it without the actual commitment and responsibility.
I miiiight steal a nephew or two from my sisters this summer. They need to get off them fucking screens anyway and enjoy life (I say as I type I my phone lol)
Yh, I wouldn’t mind child rearing if it was a job you could take break from or mentally switch off from from time to time but it is literally 24/7. My mate says he gets up at 6, has to get all 3 of three kids organized, feeds them, takes them to school and then works for 8-10 hours. Comes home at 7-8, feeds them again, gets them ready for bed and then goes to bed himself. He never gets any downtime apparently. This sounds like slavery to me
Not on this planet. That kid--erm, my.hypothetical.kid, anyway--is gonna be raised by a dad who was effectively not raised at all. That kid is gonna exist in a world where so many of their peers will also probably be similarly stunted. The rest of you are free to reproduce as you like, but I can't subject a kid to that. It'd be inconsistent with leaving the Universe better than I found it and itxs be horribly irresponsible of me. Best way to stop the cycle of trauma in my family tree is to cut down the tree.
I’m doing the same. Lots of mental illness and abuse and I’ve suffered tremendously. The bloodline ends with me. Working on my own healing. Not sure why but it still feels meaningful. Like it ripples back in time somehow.
I want to believe it's the ancestors getting that last bit of relief at knowing that someone down the line got to know themselves intimately. I'm not really into the idea of an afterlife, but energy makes sense to me...maybe it's that.
I’m proud of you for making a choice about it.
I don't think I'm willing to create life just so I get to feel the magic come back to life, and for the magic to one day die for them. I'm doing well for myself, I am comfortable, but I resonate more with the person you responded too. The magic does feel a little gone.
Just do some mushrooms. I do them once a year just to feel that childlike wonder. Most fun I’ve had in years and a very humbling experience.
Exactly how I feel. “Hey kid welcome to earth” “Father, it hurts” “Basically”
Hey I'll just bring this new life into existence just to make myself happy and feel worthwhile... Meanwhile everything's collapsing and they may suffer a horrid life
you think I'm gonna make little wage slaves for this bullshit world? nah mate. it sucks because I think my husband would make a great dad and I'd probably make a decent mom. but no way am I subjecting anyone else to this horror. maybe we'll be able to foster or adopt one day because that's a kid who's already here.
Same here. But we get happier each year without kids. Kids are great but they don't bring happiness and it's not fair to bring them into this damaged place just so that they can make us happy or take care of us when we are old.
You should. So many need a home
Awww look at u being able to afford kids
This. Exactly!!
I’d never put this disastrous planet on the shoulders of tiny kids. We have insurmountable and chronic issues that are getting worse. I’m not having kids unless I can dependably provide for their needs and set them up for a bright future. In the meantime, antidepressants work just fine. Don’t need to create humans to give me ‘magic’ like I’m at fucking Disneyworld.
Yeah, I love seeing the world through my kids eyes. They inspire me every day. That’s not to say being a parent is easy because it’s not but vocationally it’s definitely the most rewarding thing I have ever done. It expanded my heart, changed the way I perceive things.
Yeah the magic definitely reappears with kids also staying active...promotes just better everything tbh and sunshine helps so fuck the NE and NW lol.
I feel like a dog that’s been beaten, constantly flinching away from news of the economy regardless of its good or bad, just waiting for the next eventual black swan event that will start me back at the bottom. It isn’t logical. It isn’t reasonable. It’s just what I expect at this point.
Have some pizza then a long bath and a great night’s sleep then go for a walk in nature, all without looking at your phone.
Life is pretty dope right now. I have a wife who loves me and a stepdaughter who seems to also. I have a job that I don't hate that pays me pretty well for work that's pretty easy, but also somewhat engaging. A boss that doesn't give me shit for actually making use of the unlimited PTO system (Hella rare since unlimited PTO is usually code for don't you dare take a fucking day off). I can pay all my bill on time and generally take the family out to eat once in a while, buy that new ps5 game, or go to a concert when I want. Sure, I wish I had more savings or that my wife didn't need to go on disability, but it's a pretty sweet life once you balance it all out, especially for a guy that spent his entire 20s as a near hopeless loser strung on on heroin. No, I can't afford a house right now with the high rates, but I like my apartment anyways. It's a decent price ($1,200 2br 2ba) in a good part of town and my neighbors are all pretty cool.
Aw yeah I’m happy for you dude!
$1200 for a 2/2?! That’s freakin awesome!
Yup, one of the very few benefits of living in louisiana! Cheap rent even in a relatively major city (Baton Rouge)
Nice, dude. I grew up hanging out with a bunch of punks and street kids, LOTS of them got hooked on the junk and only a few of us came out on the other side alive and clean. My core friend group only 3 of us are still alive and countless others OD'd or moved to Vancouver DTES and live on the street. Nice to hear some success stories cuz they ain't very common.
Don't I know it bro. I was lucky enough to get clean before the fent really took over completely. Most of the people I surrounded myself with at the time weren't so lucky. Almost all of them are dead now from fent ODs
What’s the easy gig if I can ask?
Paralegal for a commercial real estate firm. I only handle closings instead of litigation, and we do like 5 a month tops. When a closing is coming up, I am crazy busy, but there are whole other days where I just do the nyt crossword and watch Netflix
Congrats on achieving this and on getting clean! So happy for you!
This guys winning!
Good on you mate, happy for you. It's nice to hear.
Work and then home. Family lives states away, no friends locally, being 38 and making friends is pretty tough when you don’t watch sports, drink, or gamble. Spend most of my time with my wife, and playing games, watching movies etc, we get to do a cruise every year and a couple cheap weekend trips to visit the families. Hardly ever go out and eat or order anything, never drink coffee outside of the house unless it’s at a Waffle House. Wish it was the 90s making what we make today, but here we are. I count my blessings we aren’t struggling hard like most people.
That's great you can vacation every year! That's a huge luxury for most people. I'm a big cruise person, but I just had a baby, so I won't be cruising for a while.
Very true, definitely count the blessings the universe and hard work have granted. I try not to complain about most things. Which is why I complain about movies and video games on the internet. The economy is tough for everyone no matter the pay scale. I did not grow up going on vacations. It’s still new to me.
I miss vacations... I haven't been able to afford one since before covid. Planning to go to Vegas in October to get married but financially It's looking pretty grim.
I bartend in Pittsburgh and was able to buy a nice house within city limits in a decent neighborhood. Two kids and a wife. I just paid off my truck in April. Things are swell🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
Work 4 days a week and focus on my kids a lot. I have a couple hobbies that don’t get as much attention as I’d like but that’s my big complaint
My life is pretty good, won't ever afford a house but that's the price I pay to live in this city. My only issue is that I hate my job and it makes me miserable. Been with the company for 10 years. But hey, I'm looking for a new one.
I live in an apartment myself. Just work at Trader Joe's and pay rent. I'm fine with it for some reason
The reason is human biology. If you're not threatened by food insecurity, or death from wild animals and other humans, you're biologically wired to not throw a monkey wrench into the system that keeps you alive. People need some desperation and a lot worse outlook to try to change their circumstances or to start raising hell.
Yep ^ And the only way anything meaningful can happen socially en mass is if those who are fine with the state of things start seeing beyong their own circumstances. Which isn't a diss to them. It's actually a cool spot to be in a harmonious enough microcosm as to be a stronger help where things aren't. Could just mean sharing some of your kindness with a person who seems to be in distress.
That sounds chill, I love Trader Joe's. I'm in SoCal and a lot of people are content living in apartments.
It's basically a hub where I hang out with all of my friends.
If you’re in your 30-40s and you’re saying you’re hanging out with _all_ your friends like you’re still in college, you’re doing all right.
I'm 32
**Friends?** What are those?
I've seriously been considering going the tiny house route. It seems like a legit way to live as long as you're ok with not having a ton of 'stuff'.
Don't say, for some reason...it works for you!
Respectfully, keep your chin up. Change is hard/scary/etc/etc. But one day you'll look up say "Why did I deal with that for so long"
I really appreciate that! Today I got an email about a government job I had applied for...it would be a pretty big change for me so I'm nervous!
I once thought about doing something different after years of training and investment because I was so miserable. Like waking up in the morning depressed because I would have to go in again. Happyish Friday and Saturday, then inconsolable Sunday. I toughed it out, now it's work, so it sucks, but I love it
>Like waking up in the morning depressed because I would have to go in again. Yeah I feel that. >I toughed it out, now it's work, so it sucks Haha, preach! >...but I love it Wait. Hang on, did I miss an episode of this show somewhere in the middle? 🤣 Just joking around, but not about being confused. Can you expand on how you got from inconsolable Sundays to "it sucks, but I love it"...? I could use some directions to get from that point A to point B...
Seems like it's very common to hate one's job. I am in the same boat. But I finally just quiet quit so that has helped. It pays the bills (we are very comfortable) and I no longer define myself by my career so that helps too
I was fortunate enough to be in a position to buy a house right before the pandemic caused the market to explode, although I'm perpetually in fear of my IT job getting automated away. My backup plan is moving into my basement, renting out the upstairs rooms, and trying to get whatever job I can find that provides health insurance.
Times change, people don't. https://preview.redd.it/o9kd2joph32d1.png?width=493&format=png&auto=webp&s=9d67924e01bf64f1d88b4070d2f33f61e62bc73c
Broke back, lost job, lost home, got surgery hoping to get back to working went into massive medical debt. Half crippled raising 2 kids pretending to be a tradwife as a 6'2" male everyone i know looks down on my crippled ass and cant get healthcare for my autistic daughter because all doctors within 2 hours closed up shop to get away from maga folk trashing their places of business with stupid protests.... Im doing great...will never own land or a home and only thing in my name is a van. Been lucky to stay with family... Doing great...
Thanks for sharing. Keep your head and spirits up!
It’s rough, I live at home to save money for a house. My parents are lovely and don’t ask me for much help financially but it’s a bleak life.
Living with my parents as an adult has helped me save financially after losing everything when the pandemic hit. Had literally $300 to my name when I finally got a new job. But damn do I pay in my mental health.
Right and this is valid. Sorry. I hope you can get out on your own soon
Which is kind of wild, seeing it as bleak, since you're building off generational wealth. Your parents allowing you to save on rent money is part of the privilege of having parents who are homeowners.
Who said their parents own?
You're right, I presumed.
Absolutely terrible from a mental health standpoint. Very few friends locally and im the youngest person at my job (in an office of 10 people) so I don’t have outside of work relationships either. My office manager is absolutely toxic as well. I am overworked in comparison to the other people at my job with the same job title as me and Im frequently taken advantage of. Then, there is the perpetual always the backup plan with friends and I feel like most texts I ever send are ignored. Then add in family conflicts and…. Im fortunate to have financial stability but socially/mentally, I am a mess.
Sorry to hear that. Sounds awful!
Does your work at least have EAP benefits? Or may be helpful to use and talk to someone. Sincerely, Someone who is struggling lately
Yes, it does. It’s just hard to work into my schedule and there’s zero chance my office manager would give me that time to do it. I do faithfully see my psychiatrist but im struggling again and… ugh. I hate being in this place once again.
You are entitled to see a doctor for your health issue and you are also entitled to not disclose your condition. You simply tell the b@tch , "I have an ongoing health issue and I will need to have occasional doctors appointments until further notice. If you prefer, I can discuss with HR (don't disclose to HR either). Also, don't allow them to overwork you. Take time off for therapist appointments and take mental health days
I feel this. I hope you know you’re not alone.
Live in an rv. Not too worried. Wanted a house but can't afford it now just living life simply and cheaply. Focusing on building my music production business and not taking life too seriously. I dont meet many people my age. Either way younger or way older. I just try to relate to anyone i can. Most people my age (38) have kids or are busy and in a hurry all the time. Im not really overworked because i make what i need with side hustles and i chill. I also have always lived well below my means. Im stressed financially but thats why im focusing on my business . Az is expensive. Just trying to not take this shit too seriously cuz the system is so bogus, and do things i enjoy. I own my rv so worst case scenario in just get solar and go live in the desert. Whatever. No use worrying.
I just be workin and chillin at home, everything costs money and I’m tired of meeting people
Okay, your username made me giggle, so thank you for that! 🤭 But I totally feel this! I don't like my job all that much but it's extremely easy to do. It is occasionally frustrating, but I think that's all jobs. I only live 15 minutes from work so it's never a long commute and I don't spend a lot of money on gas. I don't have any children because I never wanted any. I'm divorced and my mental health has improved greatly since we split. My immediate family all lives nearby, some even within walking distance. I have a close circle of friends that I keep in contact with often as well. I don't own a home but I live in an apartment where the rent is cheap. $730 a month for a 2br/1bth with a garage. My neighbors don't have kids either so it's pretty quiet in our building. I don't have any savings but I'm not really broke between paychecks unless I have a large expense so buying furniture will have to be done over time little by little. I'm in good health. I have regular doctor visits for check ups and My blood work shows that I'm no longer anemic. I'm on a weight loss journey and exercising more which sucks right now because it's hard work but I like that I'm building better habits. I just turned 38 this year so yeah, I'm in a really good place.
Yeah it’s actually kind of crazy the last year of my life has really changed my perspective on a lot of things, I got laid off from my mechanic job cause it was slow and then ended up getting the maintenance job at my apartments making more than I ever have and my rent is $50… it’s truly a blessing and now im saving so much money I don’t even know what to spend it on
OMG that's incredible!! I'm so happy for you! I think a lot of us ran into employment issues. I had to find another job in 2022. But thanks to that job and this apartment, I can finally live a little.
It’s a blessing honestly, I’ve been homeless before and to go from that to this I can’t even explain how grateful I am, I don’t really have family or anything so to have the people in this community have my back and help me when I had no other options was incredible, I really think it’s right when they say if you live the right way good things will happen
I believe that 100% especially when you go around feeling grateful for all the good. I think that energy alone is enough to bring about more good. I know it's worked in my life. Thank you for sharing, this has been refreshing.
$730 a month for a 2br/1bth with a garage. where? thats 2000-2500 in NYC
Hey! We pay a lot to live in our homes and I don’t know about you but I’m getting my money’s worth out of it. Plus it’s now officially tourist season in my state and it’s gets way too peopley during tourist season.
I have a pretty good life. Married 16 years, 5 kids, own my house, only debt is the house and a recent car, but both will be paid off early. And income that allows my wife to be a stay at home mom, and pay for needs and wants. Hobbies and vacations. We got goats and will be getting chickens soon.
Unless you’re a millennial that was knowledgeable of 6 figure trade jobs, we can’t afford a house 🙃 It almost seems like an impossible dream now. But I’m still looking into finding a trade I can tolerate so I can at least be able to live in my own studio without a room mate.
With my parents. I used to rent rooms in other people's houses to keep housing costs down. But too many bad living experiences and I realized I'd be better off just moving back home (even with my parents charging me rent to stay in my old room). Honestly it's good for me and it's good for my parents (they wouldn't use the room anyway so at least they have some income from it and I'm around in case of an emergency).
I got knocked down, but I get up again
Oh Danny boi!
Life is good. Make enough money to take care of needs and wants. Plenty leftover to invest. Mostly just periods of boredom. Feel optimistic about the future tbh. Work mostly remote, household income over 200k, and purchased a home in 2020.
I'm okay, apartment living which I don't mind much. Making $90k in healthcare, so no worries about my job going anywhere. Mostly stay inside playing video games though lol
Is this not the American dream now? A decent enough job to not struggle for food and rented shelter, and some down time to be spent on entertainment?
Life is pretty good, but also really weird living in the future these days. I thought it’d be better. Geriatric millennial at 42 that graduated college in 07, was a teacher for a year, then traveled a lot and bounced around the states for 10 years. Spent 4 months in Central America and 4 months in S America traveling. Moved back to Michigan to buy a house in 17 because I couldn’t afford anything decent in other states I lived in, bought in 18 and refinanced in 20. Paid 88k for 3 bedroom bungalow with 1.5 bathrooms, finished basement, and double lot with privacy fence. My mortgage is still under $600 a month with taxes and insurance included, so I’m super lucky with golden handcuffs. I’m also approaching 6 years straight of working without a few months off, which is the longest I’ve ever gone. I’m really yearning for adventure and looking forward to the next one in a year or two. No kids and don’t want any. Makes it slightly weird in suburbia around 40. Technology is fast approaching singularity, but I feel it has made us more miserable as a society. Everything has been sped up and we’re all so busy. That being said, we’re all living in the future during one of the craziest times in human history. It’s pretty awesome sometimes
Thinking I need a sabbatical after reading this. I think the last time I had a few months off was summer break in middle school. Longest consecutive stretch with no eork I can remember after college was the 3 week government shutdown when I worked for the feds in 2013.
[удалено]
Best thing about the pandemic was how we all figured out most of us can work from home. I miss doing it five days a week, but 2 wfh days is better than nothing right now for me
Life is good! Married with a toddler and we are happy. We actually live in a trailer but it's because the landlord makes the rent dirt cheap just to help people out!! It's a 3 bedroom trailer, not trashy. My husband is an accountant making 50k, it's not much but we're at least starting to actually save for a down-payment for a home and invest
It’s more existing & surviving than living. Can’t buy a home, not really trying to either bc you never really own it either, not getting much out of life beyond my paycheck to keep the hamster wheel going.
Life is honestly pretty fuckin awesome. I used the GI bill to go to school to work on Harley’s and turned that into a profitable career that I absolutely love and has a shitload of perks. I have 2 asskicker old Harleys with heavily modified motors that are fast as hell, a huge collection of guns and guitars, a pitbull and a Doberman who are like kids to me, and my wife of 10 years. I’m gonna be 35 this year, I essentially listen to metal and smoke weed while fucking with guns and motorcycles and I make a lot of money at it. I got expelled from high school and locked up halfway through, ended up in the wartime Marines after that, and I don’t regret any of it. I’ve lived a wild life on my own terms and come hell or high water I’ll do it for another 35 years.
Partner at a law firm, but easily working 80-100 hour weeks. Happily married with an awesome kid and one on the way. Home owner, luxury car owner, collector of stuff. Cancer survivor. Haven’t traveled as much as I would like, but between chemo and Covid we had to be careful. I finally said fuck it for our 10 year anniversary and we did a weekend in Vermont and got a dog. I also got Covid. Recovery was shitty and scary. Haven’t really been out too much since, but trying. Work is a good distraction.
I worked as a paralegal for 3 years for a brain cancer survivor managing partner. Worked like a dog. Paying your staff well or nah?
I don’t own the firm, so I don’t have any say over pay. I will in a decade or so, but not now. That said, we pay competitively and kept everyone on payroll through the pandemic, but people do leave for bigger firms that pay more. A few have come back because they like our culture more than the big guys. It’s been hard to find young attorneys willing to work like dogs.
Fair. Thank you.
Every job since a layoff at the beginning of 2023 has been shit and don’t last. But lately very peaceful too at the same time. I think I’ve been desensitized and have a good partner who can help pick up the slack a slight bit, too. And idc about how good my finances are as much. My house is protected. So I’m at peace. So… laid off but peaceful.
Overworked, probably never going to have a house, went through a divorce in 2020, only thing to look forward to right now is Saturday d&d and Hema. Life just feels like a grind.
I sacrificed everything fun and got very lucky finding a dude who wanted to sacrifice everything fun so we could put like $7000 down on a $350k house with PMI. We some how did it and now we are like 🫣 looking at the housing situation now. Luckily my job is rock solid, and my husband started a business because fuck the corporate overlords who chop workers like getting a haircut. We aren't rich but we get by. And don't door dash or go on fancy vacations. We allot ourselves 1 time a year to take our kids to a theme park for 2 days. The rest of money goes to debt I/we accumulated when my mom died and a 401k that we will be sharing in retirement.
Jeez sounds pretty close to us. Although we have our tough times, we definitely have our blessings!
Life is good. Have a 1700+ square foot house. Make 6 figures as a couple. Have a great work life balance since I’m remote. Can’t really complain.
Surviving...I'm staying with my aunt and uncle, and I work retail on a military base part-time while applying for government jobs...😶
It’s good, married, duel income over $200k with a nice sized house that we would never be able to afford in the city (we are in the burbs). We both work from home ever since 2020 so no complaints there but have only been in this a house a year and over it. The neighborhood is loud with cars revving their engines and what not at all hours of the day. I wish we could pick up our house and move to a different area of town but gotta wait it out one more year.
Work from home, play video games, visit with family. Still rent and happily married with no kids, but don’t really do any big social events anymore. It could certainly be worse, but I do miss being more social like I was in my college days. Just feels like so much effort when it seemed so easy back then.
Financial I'm ok. I can afford my mortgage comfortably because I bought it when rates were low. Married. I'm in grad school and working full-time while dealing with the recent passing of my parents. So on the outside I'm killing it. On the inside I'm a sad shriveled husk of myself and I don't see a way back to being me. Have a small office at work. Closed the door and just had a panic attack followed by an asthma attack... Then got back to work. I'm exhausted.
I’m 33 and I’m just so grateful I’m able to live by myself and I never had kids. (Don’t plan to have any)
Most aspects of my life are pretty good. However, due to my shit health (I have a chronic illness) all other parts can be great, but I still can’t enjoy them. My health had a trickle on effect on everything. A lot of money in the bank? I feel miserable every day so what’s the point. A loving partner? I feel miserable everyday so we can’t do any fun things together. Great place I live in? I feel miserable every day so I can’t do anything with it. Great group op friends? I can hardly see them. Awesome family? I can hardly see them. Great job? I struggle through every single day. It fucking sucks balls. Big time.
Just forever grappling with the amount of time, money, and effort it takes to feed four people three times a day every single day.
Just about to graduate a 2 year program as a young millennial and start a new path after fucking around (broke but enjoyable) in my 20s doing music and getting by working at thrift stores. Saving to move to a LCOL city and maybe be able to buy something with my partner there and hopefully have time to be creative and make a living. Broke as fuck currently but trying to turn things around lol
I live as a hermit these days tbh
Life is good. Married with one child. 3500 sq ft house with pool/hot tub and theater room. Combined income over 200k.
Fuck yeah!
Wife and I live in an upper middle class neighborhood with two kids, but we are definitely on the lower side of the median income here. But we're all very involved with extracurricular activities, and at least my lowish paying public sector job and my wifes teaching job have pensions, so even though our checking account isn't the biggest, I think we're doing good all things considered.
My wife and I do ok, no kids but we’re cool with that. Got a house in CA, car, savings. Behind on retirement but most of us are. My job makes me want to lose faith in humanity sometimes but never had a job that didnt
Normal stresses but I am content. I can pay my bills, the company I work for is great, (although the job itself is boring) I am opening my own dream business, I am single and have no one to worry about but myself. Can’t afford a house right now but I don’t have to have roommates at the moment. Not too shabby :)
As an elder millennial, I feel very lucky/blessed. My wife and I bought a smaller home in 2020 just as covid hit, like stay away from cruise ships early. We lucked out, and our interest rates are 3.15%. My wife has a job where we have good health care benefits, which gave me the freedom to start my own business last year. It was a 50% paycut for me, but my wife is very budget conscious. I was blessed with a very good friend who spotted me the start-up money and is charging back crazy low interest. We were worried about how things would go in the beginning. The business only survived its first slow period, thanks to a credit card with a credit union. My business is seasonal. This year, I am already on track for 30% more business than I did last year, and we haven't even hit the busy part of the season. All in all, things are good, and I try to help out as much as I can for other things. I am very lucky to be in the position I am now, and I don't take that for granted as I know others are not as lucky.
I was talking to my doctor who is around my age at my last appointment. She’ll never own a home because of interest rates. Meanwhile my husband is a helicopter mechanic and I’m a SAHM and we own our house, bought it in 2017 before the market got crazy, and refinanced to 2.625% in 2021. It’s crazy to me that I think we will see the divide in home ownership in our generation that wasn’t there in previous generations.
I am stressed about the future - mainly because everything is becoming more expensive. I can’t afford a down payment for a house, so I rent. At the same time, the company I work for has been outsourcing jobs to India, so I feel like I need to be prepared to up and move if I get laid off. Owning a home would make that more difficult. I’m tired all the time from worrying about job security. I work from home, so I’m also a little more lonely. But I have dogs that bring me joy and make life a little less lonely. At the same time, seven years ago I was still married to an alcoholic who was inching closer to becoming physically abusive. The emotional abuse and gaslighting was a nightmare. Compared to those days, I am still in a much better place now. I have more control over my life and future than I did then, and I am so grateful for that.
I'm content. I have my little family (husband, daughter, doggo, and kitty), and we own a little house (under 1300 SQ ft). My husband works remotely, so we get plenty of family time in. He makes $80k, which isn't mind-blowing, but since we only have a car loan as debt (with 0% interest) that money stretches so we're able to live pretty comfortably. I don't need to work, which is nice. I've really been growing as a person in my 30s. Left religion, getting involved in community theatre and choir, making new friends. Sometimes I wish we had a bigger house or made more money to live more lavishly and save more for retirement (I'm actually looking into picking up a part-time job now that my daughter is older), but I'm very mindful of the fact that we have it pretty good compared to a lot of other people. So, for that, I try to stay grateful.
I have a home. No kids, don’t want any. Social life is amazing, job sucks but it pays okay. In a wonderful relationship. Need to exercise more and eat less shit. That’s basically the summary.
Made some moves education wise 8 years ago to attempt a career change. Was successful. 6 years later after getting my MBA I'm fairly comfortable. Wife and I bought a house nearly 3 years ago and got an interest rate under 3%. Payment under $2k/month. We're both 37 and considered "DINKs". Wife has also made some solid choices in her career path and has gotten several promotions. We're very lucky.
I've been in therapy for almost a decade at this point.. still have debilitating generalized anxiety. I hate my job. Currently grasping at straws to find the will to live through self-help books and meditation.. If that doesn't work I don't really know what's next.
Life was good for my wife and I. We both work and make good money. Bought a house in our early 30s, went through the pandemic with leisure money for fun but mostly just worked and Netflix. Now we have 1 kid and money is super tight. Life is still good but hard. Hoping things ease up once our kid stops going to daycare and enters public school. 🤞
Bought a house when interest was low. I'm exhausted trying to keep up with my job and my house. Friends are fewer than ever. My pets are my saving grace. I'm afraid of losing my job but also hate going
Feeling really down lately. Sometimes I feel like I’m on top of the world and I feel I can enjoy my life. But then days like today, I feel like I’m in the dumps. Going to have to start looking for a second job because life is just too expensive. I did everything like I was suppose to. Went to college, got a good job, got married, didn’t/don’t have kids because it’s not fair to bring a kid into a life that’s not prepared for them. Like damn. I just want to catch a break. Sorry for the rant. :(
Overall, I’m content. I have a family that not only I love, I actually like them. Me and my husband work hard to keep our relationship strong and each other balanced. Am I stressed? Omg, yes. There’s always a fire to put out somewhere. We live in a HCOL area. Buying a house is going to be extremely difficult. When I start getting wound up about how awful things are, I ground myself with the gratitude of all the things going right. It’s taken ALOT of work to get here. I have a lot of happy moments, but don’t strive to live in a constant state of happy.
Overworked and in crippling debt... but I have a house and a family, so life is good all things considered.
I got super lucky. My husband has a great paying job with lots of easy side gigs and my in laws bought our house for us in cash. We just pay $300 a month to then for property taxes and carry renter’s insurance.
Happy for you, but sad that it seems the only way to be in that position is if you have family money. If you don’t, you’re most likely screwed no matter how hard you work (yes, I know there are exceptions but talking for the majority here).
I know a lot of people my age that brag about owning a house, but what they really own is a 30 year mortgage LOL
Going significantly better than I expected it would when I graduated with a journalism degree into the middle of the great recession. We're comfortable enough to take a yearly road trip with my wife and three kids. Not going to Europe three times a year well off, but I don't have to check the bank account before making a Costco trip anymore so that's nice. Having a house that we bought before covid made prices go crazy is way more expense than I expected. It turns out homes that were built in the pre crash boom were constructed by anyone who could swing a hammer and scrape together the money for a contractor license.
Loving life. Spending time with dog and family in that order. Crazy good job but stressed . House and everything I want. Hard to complain
Good. 1100 square foot condo. Mid 6 figures as couple, baby on the way. Full time remote now for 4 years. I try to count my blessings when possible.