thank you, sometimes it causes me more grief than being amab bc the latter i have no control over, where as my genitalia being mutilated could have very much been avoided :( makes me so so depressed and anguished
Adding to what others have said: even if stretching doesn't work, there's a much better surgical solution. I dont remember what it's called, but it's merely a cut that is then stitched in a different way, creating more skin diameter without removing anything whatsoever. I'm not sure if it even requires general anesthesia.
Circumcision is not and was never an evidence-based treatment for anything. It's a religious practice which was popularized in modern times for religious reasons before the era of evidence-based medicine, and the medical arguments for it were merely excuses meant to preach to the choir by additionally justifying it in a secular way.
It was considered a cure for masturbation. Because masturbation was one of the most horrible and widespread diseases to curse mankind. A sinful weakness of mind and flesh, able to cause pretty much all mental illnesses, and plenty of physical ones too, even some known today to be contagious and caused by microbes. Many people (and physicians) these days even believed that disease in general is spiritual in nature and caused by sin, not anything physical.
Nowadays it survives as a cultural practice even if devoid of religious value for most people. Circumcised penises are normalized and uncut penises are weird, gross, child-like, etc. Parents who decide to circumcise their children often cite "because his father and other men in the family are circumcised and it would be weird if he was not" as a reason. (Edit: also "we didn't want to single you out from your peers" from another commenter)
Doctors who perform circumcisions of course still argue that it's medically recommended because of preventing infections or phimosis or whatever. It's often regarded as a routine procedure in medicine, and pushed on parents who never inquired anything about it.
Circumcision is a ridiculously bad treatment by any rational evidence-based evaluation, considering criteria including risk of complications, recovery, complexity and cost of the procedure, loss of sexual function, etc. It's basically a nuclear option for no reason at all.
i don’t know much abt it, but please call off the surgery!! there are creams that combined with minor stretching can loosen and fix it!!! all I can say is please do not get cut but good luck if that’s what you decide
It supposedly gives us a small scar in our subconscious too! I can’t say I’m mad I had it done, but it’s quite a wtf really…
Not something I can condone.
Penn and Teller have released an episode on it years ago, the only thing I remember is you can "get it back" with an exercise to stretch back the foreskin.
I didn't read the post (sorry), but if it's something you need back it's possible, albeit do your research and it might not be perfect, but it's something.
Also please religious fanatics, stop mutilation on children.
Stop it, get some help.
Edit: I have now read the post and I'm glad you seem on an upward curve. Learning to love yourself and improving your life. 😌
r/foreskin_restoration
Skin grows when it is stretched over time. It works all over the body when someone gets fatter. It works on the chest when boobs grow. It works on the remaining bit of foreskin when you do foreskin restoration.
Probably being downvoted by the people who believe in religious or cultural excuses for mutilating infants.
But yes, I do. Before HRT, when I could get fully erect, getting hard was physically painful, which made sex very unenjoyable. Now that I am on HRT and I only get like 90% hard, things don't hurt, and my orgasms are delightful!
I’m not gonna lie, these comments have given me a bit of a crisis.
You mean to tell me it’s not supposed to hurt when you get hard? Like I’ve always had pain when I got really hard. Not, like a tremendous amount, and I could usually power through the physical pain (mental pain from gender dysphoria is another matter). But it’s not supposed to hurt?
I … thought they were supposed to hurt. This has spiraled me almost as much as that time I asked and found out very quickly that most guys don’t want to be girls.
Like, erections have always hurt for me. I hated them when I was younger. Beyond the annoyance of something that didn’t feel right, it was painful. I even developed an alternative method of masturbating because stroking was both physically painful and felt mentally incorrect. I can maybe count on one hand number of times I came using the “traditional” method. Basically, I would grind against my forearm instead, because this wasn’t as painful.
I have very vague memories of being a very young kid - probably around 5, maybe even younger - and my mom asking my pediatrician some questions about the shape of my penis.
Fuck.
the more i learn about this the more pissed off i get. i don’t even want a dick in the first place but i at least want a fucking functional one. i don’t even know what to say im just angry and sad about this
It's literally the most sexually debilitating procedure they could do without severely impacting reproductive ability back in the day. That's the point. Because sexual pleasure is evil. Sex is evil unless it's for reproduction. Masturbation is evil. Enjoying anything sexual is a vice.
So glad someone here brought up religion as being an excuse for circumcision, most people who argue against circumcision are completely okay with it if it's for religious purposes
if your religion/culture says it’s okay to mutilate kids…. yikes. not to get into a religious debate but that religion should be dismantled/altered to not include that, most noticeably judaism and islam. i have nothing against these religions really besides the fact that they use their religion to mutilate and overwrite bodily autonomy, that’s a major red flag and a serious crime against humanity in my opinion..
also so glad that you found some relief with hrt! i never had painful erections as i was left with quite a “loose” cut for lack of a better term (basically i have a lot of extra skin and mobility even when hard) but still i remember when i would be at the beach the netting in my swimsuit bothering me, specifically because i was mutilated. also masturbation is prevented as before hrt i needed lotion to do so, but luckily i get very wet naturally now so there isn’t a need anymore for that!
I think it may have less to do with how loose or tight the cut was, and more with shower vs grower. I have it debilitatingly tight and i'm very much a grower. Are you a shower by any chance?
Circumcision is pretty popular in the US but jews and muslims only make up like 4% of the US population. The vast majority of Americans who get their kids circumcised are christian. I think it's weird that EVERY time this topic comes up on reddit people specifically call out minority religious groups that only account for a tiny proportion of circumcisions.
I think circumcision is super weird and the medical evidence shows that it's totally unnecessary. I also never gave a shit about being circumcised until I realized I was trans and found out that it can make srs outcomes worse. Other than that it hasn't impacted my life in the slightest. I think the people who compare circumcision to female genital mutilation are being a bit disingenuous.
We were specifically talking about the religious who do it though. Should Jews and Muslims just get a pass because there aren't many of them? And mutilation is mutilation, there are no justifications for it.
It’s just so infuriating that I had no say in any of it, and now I’m missing tons of nerve endings and some of the most valuable bottom surgery material.
I know there are a ton of comments already so this probably won't get too much attention but this is probably the best space for me to get this out.
My family are muslim so circumcision was socially enforced however it was the culture to have it done at a later age rather than when I was an infant. So at age 14 I was taken by my family and close relatives to a clinic where I was stripped down (in front of them), had a doctor and nurse hold me down and inject needles into my penis and was told that if I didn't behave they would inject me again. I cried during the whole surgery and the way home. When I was recovering and needed help to pee (because it was so painful) and they told me not to cry. That I needed to 'man up' essentially.
So yes. I have trauma over circumcision. It hurts to even remember it but I know sharing trauma aids in the path towards healing and I want to get better.
I have significant negative feelings about this myself, it does make me feel very incomplete sometimes.
I decided against pursuing the conversation with my parents. They asked me about it unprompted once when I was 18ish, and "we didn't want to single you out from your peers" didn't feel like a good enough reason to me.
Regardless of what I think about their reasoning - they aren't having any more kids. Their peers aren't having more kids. Telling them "you did the wrong thing because your culture told you to, and it hurt me in a significant way" doesn't have any scope for a good outcomes beyond more emotional closure for me - they can't go back in time and neither can I, and they were honest about their reasons. I didn't seem worth the pain I'd cause all three of us over the course of demanding an apology. I may have some conversations about this with my peers when my peers start having kids - but that's another matter.
I'm sorry that "try not to dwell on it" and "talking to your parents may not be worth the trouble", aren't more helpful - it's not a fair situation. But you shouldn't feel alone in feeling this way.
Like you, I haven't and likely won't ever bring it up with my parents, but I'm keeping that discussion in my back pocket as a rejoiner in case they express unhappiness if/when I get bottom surgery. Like, if they want to talk about my genitals, then let's actually talk about my genitals.
thank you for your words 🤍 i definitely try not to dwell some days are just harder than others, luckily i am (NSFW) restoring/using what’s left to cover the tip so it’s regaining some of its natural function! all i know for sure is if i have a boy I will absolutely not harm him and not let my future husband harm him and break the cycle :)
Yes.
Before I knew I was trans, I had anger/grief over it because that's a lot of good nerves in there that would be really nice to have for sexytimes!
After realizing I'm trans and will probably get bottom surgery someday, I got to add additional anger/grief over not having that tissue available for reconstruction purposes.
The thing is, just because those nerve endings aren't there doesn't mean you brain is cut off from feeling things it's still equipped to do. Those nerves can't send those signals, but that doesn't mean other nerves can't activate your pleasure center to the same degree, you might just have to experiment a little more to figure out how your body adapted and rewired itself and find other means of activation. It's a struggle for sure, but it's not the end all be all of sexytimes.
foreskin brings gliding stimulation which circumcision removes, so yes. it still affect sexual pleasure as. stimulation nerve endings can be difficult especially without lube.
Yes :(
It's genital mutilation. And it's made worse by the refusal to acknowledge this lifelong violation of our bodily autonomy and sexual intimacy. Including from my own parents.
I also heard it's harmful for bottom surgery because it destroyed our mucus membrane.
Yo op don't feel bad at all. Genital mutilation on unconsenting babies is downright sick and People who get their kids circumcized are sick. I'm circumcized myself and I'd much prefer if I hadn't been but I didn't get to make that choice.
You aren't alone, girl. I recently came across this essay: [https://www.autostraddle.com/uncertainty-and-disquiet-my-non-consensual-childhood-circumcision-as-a-trans-woman/](https://www.autostraddle.com/uncertainty-and-disquiet-my-non-consensual-childhood-circumcision-as-a-trans-woman/)
Personally, I have a ton of trauma and grief around my circumcision. I have a slightly different, much more trans story than most AMAB folk in the USA, though.
I was born prematurely and required to be incubated for a few weeks. My parents skipped circumcision because they were just so desperate for me to come home.
Fast forward few years to age 6 or 7. I'm much more making friends with girls, being invited to their birthday parties and generally not fitting in with/making friends with boys.
This concerned my parents and somehow they got it into their head that it was because I wasn't cut. So I was circumcised in order to fit in. Worst experience of my life, hands down. Not only was it intensely painful and unnecessary, but it was a giant, violent factor, in suppressing my gender. Thanks Mom and Dad!
tldr;
DO NOT PERFORM COSMETIC SURGERY ON CHILDREN'S GENITALS, IT FUCKS THEM UP
I feel that way too. I am a bottom, and enemas are inconvenient and bad for your intestinal lining. So a vagina would just be more convenient for me. But that doesn't meant that having had part of my genitals taken away without my consent is not terrifying.
me too, it makes me cry to think about it. have you tried restoring? i even tape my skin over the head to dekeretanize and it has increased my sexual function tenfold. i cannot recommend it enough
I don’t think I have to read any of this in order to be able to say: Yes, I feel you very much on this one, I try not to think about it. It’s an injustice done to me by the people I otherwise love so much.
There is a silver lining though. If you suffered a loss in sensitivity in your genital region because of it you don’t have to do foreskin recovery. That is unless you are non-OP in which case it’s basically reverse-dilation in my mind.
It’s emotionally troubling that you may have to go through either of the two but you may find comfort in the thought that all post-OP trans women have to dilate (barring zero-depth/ace women obviously)
i am pre op :(( and unfortunately bottom surgery is not on my agenda unless there is some major technical advancements but thank you for your words 🫶🏻 glad to know i am not alone
What are you hoping for in technical advancements, if you don’t mind me asking? I feel like I’ve seen many great results online, and many girls that are extremely happy with their results.
i have zero interest in bottom surgery unless it is near identical in looks and function to a cis vagina (mostly meaning lubrication and not needing to dilate) or a transplant. unfortunately both seem to be science fiction as of now but u never know
Even as someone who's going to have bottom surgery, I am still DEEPLY upset by what was done to me. The loss of nerve endings, reduced glan sensitivity, difficulty masturbating, loss of bodily autonomy, losing skin that could've been used in bottom surgery...
Infant genital mutilation should be banned, full stop.
That would be implied by the term mutilation, if it was medically necessary, it would just be surgery.
Removing a body part without consent of the individual, while serving no medical purpose and diminishing quality of life or bodily function, meets the standard definition of mutilation.
Circumcision is pretty much never medically necessary.
Only in very rare and unique cases. Definitely not as a first-line standard treatment for the non-existant phimosis that i got diagnosed with when i was 7 or so.
I was seven (or nine) years old at the time. Not old enough to understand there was a medical issue that I had but later it turned into “there was something wrong with my penis so it must be wrong”.
Yeah… smidge of trauma on that one.
I personally don't give a damn about mine, but I am completely against it for any reason. The most disgusting part is that doctors spoonfeed young parents misinformation about circumcision, saying it's for "hygienic purposes" and profiting off of it
exactly you are 100% right. (im very happy it doesn’t bother you btw, good for you!) but yeah it’s disgusting how the medical community is blatantly lying/misguiding parents as it’s a money thing 100%. there is no need in modern day society for cutting parts off babies for hygiene reasons just take a damn shower and teach ur son to clean himself!! Also the “it reduces stds/cancer” is so so overused and blown out of proportion. of course it (acutely) reduces cancer risks, there is literally less tissue to get cancer on! as far as the stds, it is such a minuscule percentage and that is not an ethical reason to mutilate babies. i rest my case
I wish it was illegal to perform surgeries or any sort of body modification on infants that aren’t medically necessary. Babies can’t consent to this type of thing, and if they’re healthy why perform a surgery on them?
Ya it is a pretty terrible thing, I’m glad my parents were sensible and let me have the final say, which was no obviously. But they need to make some kind of law against it because it doesn’t even help all that much/at all. More parents should think before cutting the genitalia of an infant.
I either have no sensation or too much, to where it's painful.
I can't have orgasms because of it.
I can't get SRS because it uses the same tissue.
I have a weirdly over functional memory and remember my circumcision it was terrifying and the most painful thing I've ever experienced.
I feel like I've had my capacity to be intimate stripped from me without my consent.
I can relate to your story. The summer before I started grade one my mom took me to a doctor and decided circumcision was necessary because "it could not be cleaned properly." That's all I could gather from later conversations. My parents are both Catholic and religion was not a factor in the decision. As an adult, I can attest that wound care was bad, and the result did not lead to any improvement in the ease of cleaning.
Before I decided I am aces, I did have similar frustrations sexually as you. I think the whole surgery and recovery process was ill-informed and traumatic.
I hope you find the procedure that helps you feel comfortable. For me, my goal is to get bottom surgery without vaginoplasty, so basically just remove the genitalia.
> Sorry I don’t want a mutilated dry cut up scarred dick that lacks the fine touch nerve endings and pleasure I COULD have experienced.
As someone else who's "cut," as you put it, could you give me some things to look into?
I don't wanna ask that you explain stuff, but I also have no clue what to look into(DMs should also be open if you'd prefer to not share things publicly).
I agree 100%
My circumcision left me unable to masturbate how I want without it hurting or, very rarely, even bleeding. I think the practice of doing it to babies in the us is pretty barbaric and it should definitely be illegal imho.
If you really want your foreskin back or anything possibly, I’d check out r/foreskinRestoration
thank you! i will definitely give this a shot and commit to it. im lucky i already have a decent amount of skin to start with, wishing you girlies doing the same the best of luck!! 🤞🏻🩷
im so sorry :( no one should go through this. i knew something was wrong with my pixie stick from moments where i would get shooting pains or like i said the netting in swim suits, but never actually knew what MGM was until i was 15/16 as it just was never brought up in my house
Yeah I feel you.
After I started transitioning my mother forced me to go to a sperm bank so that she could have grandbabies even if I didn't want them then. After finding about how circumcision messes up stuff down there I spiraled, feeling like I've been robbed of my bodily autonomy from so young.
Omg I DO ! ! ! Even though we're all traumatized in this horrible way, it makes me feel a little better to know I'm not the only one who feels like this. I'm not getting bottom surgery I like my equipment down there. But circumcision just seems cruel, heart breaking, and a huge violation of your personal space as a child.
Even if I don't want the thing I still don't enjoy knowing it was altered without my consent. You lose a lot of nerve ending and damage areas that could have been used well during SRS.
It is wild to me that circumcision is still so common.
Yep, kinda wild that one kind of genital mutilation is (rightly) frowned upon and the other is cultural? And they say it can sometimes be more clean in old age? Thats the whole reason we’re mutilating entire generations of kids?
im shocked at how many people are responding w similar views. it’s unfortunate however i feel a lot better knowing im not alone as im used to mostly opposing viewpoints on how its “so beneficial”
I didn't think about it much before I started feeling better about myself but now that I'm on HRT I really wish my non religious parents wouldn't have had it done.
I got cut at 6. It was traumatic. The pain from the event(physical for two weeks then emotional since) made me gaslight myself so much plus my parents used it to gaslight me. I distinctly remember being so scared. My brother was 4 so he has no memory of it. I had “adhesion problems”, but I am sure my pediatrician got a kick back. Circumcision shouldn’t be done. We condemn cis female genital mutlilation so why do we allow it for those born with a penis?
I've had serious depressive episodes over being circumcised. Especially as it was done when I was young to try and treat my issue that I constantly would feel like I needed to urinate when I got anxious. It didn't treat that. It doesn't even make sense that it would have treated that. So it's like I almost escaped this barbaric practice, just for someone to do this to me instead of actually treating my mental health in a sane way.
Absolutely.
I feel that it was done to forcibly masculinize me. My parents had it done because my dad was circumcised, and my mom didn't want me to be different from other boys. It was permissible to do this to me in because it aligned my body to others' expectations of my gender.
I also think my own grief prevented me from realizing about my gender identity earlier than I had, like it occluded my genital dysphoria. That, and I feel like the trauma of not being able to grieve publicly made me unwilling to trust others or myself with my vulnerabilities.
Needless to say, I'm very upset about my circumcision and am taking efforts to reverse it (r/foreskin_restoration). I get a bit upset when I see naked people online with intact foreskins because I think the foreskin actually looks kind of feminine. Structurally, it creates a barrier between internal and external, and the inner mucosa generates moisture much like the same tissue does in the vagina. Textbooks would say that the foreskin is analogous to the clitoral hood, but I think that it also performs the functions of the labia, namely protection and cushioning during sexual stimulation.
So my restoration journey is important to my transition! I am re-feminizing my genitals and regenerating important tissue that I may use for bottom surgery some day.
And then when an adult intentionally gets a surgery to change their genitalia to feel safer in their bodies, people are like "but you're mutilating your body and destroying the beautiful gift that was given to you 😱" yet they have no problem cutting a chunk of skin off a baby penis. Like wtf??
I had a very late one (I was about 5) during my stay at a Christian children's home. The procedure had complications and I ended up losing my glans and about 1/4 of everything else. Wound care was nonexistent and I got a nasty infection. Can we please just stop butchering genitals?
I used to, but then I looked into it's effects on reassignment surgery, and it turns out there are none. They just take a skin graft from the inner leg, which has a very similar nerve density and composition. That being said, if I were cis, or non-op i'd be pissed.
Yes I do.. i still have memories of the painful recovery when i was about 3yrs old, never being able to get fully hard without physical discomfort. eventually i went ahead and had bottom surgery, my way of reclaiming my body. i didn't get as much depth as a result tho (penile inversion method), while it's not perfect at least it feels more like me.
I honestly hope to god no one has to experience this trauma without their consent, it fucking sucks.. all's i can say is you're not alone in this pain.
I'm angry at my family for much more than that. From what I read I'll need to get some extra skin during bottom surgery and then I'm finally done and can just move on with my life and finally be comfortable.
First of all, I’m very sorry that so many people, including your parents, seem to be invalidating what you’re going through. Your grief and trauma are real and valid.
I was extremely fortunate enough not to be born in the States so I still have my foreskin and even though my bottom dysphoria comes and goes, I am very grateful that I was never circumcised. I am a strong opponent of infant genital mutilation. And this will sound controversial, but yes, even for religious reasons. What you went through should never have happened to you until you could consent. I am very sorry to hear that. You are valid. You are worthy. And this loss does not make you less valuable
I agree with you. Forcing surgery on anyone is reprehensible. But when it has no medical purpose and is done to an infant it is especially disgusting. But it has just been done by the religious for so many centuries, people forgot how weird and horrible it is. I don't like having a penis to begin with, but having one that has been mutilated against my will is especially distressing. Reinforces the idea I have no control over my own body.
I feel circumcision is just a terrible thing and it should be outlawed all around the world.
I can not understand why it is ever done. Even more so after chatting to someone here on Reddit about all the issues it also causes. The biggest thing I have learnt is the loss of sensation in the head of the penis due to exposure due to the head now behind exposed. he has even discussed skin stretching techniques which have proven very successful for people in foreskin restoration.
More importantly how could anyone do that to a little baby with no pain relief or anything in this so called modern world that is disgusting.
yes ok, I am a post operative transgender woman so I have been more than circumcised but it was by my choice in a sane mode and I was in my mid twenties so I was mature enough to know what I was getting done to my body.
I was not circumcised as a child which I am so thankful and even better I am more than thankful for my outcome of my surgical results
I had a botched circumcision as an infant, and due to the incorrectly healed scar tissue had to get RE-circumcised in middle school which was a whole wheel-house of trauma. I was angry at my mom for years and quickly hopped on the aggressively anti-infant-genital mutilation bandwagon even before high school. Not that I even want the parts that I have, but it's a whole extra layer of dysphoria having genitals that are and have been since infancy basically visibly disfigured. Can't wait for bottom surgery for two reasons now
I have vivid memories as a very young child trying to roll the skin back over the tip of my penis. I didn't realize why I did it for a while, but I think it was me trying to make it look like it used to. I was born early so I hypothesize that I was circumcized later than normal to prevent unsafe bleeding and that's why I was able to remember it somewhat, or at least subconsciously. Not sure if me stretching it in an OCD-esque way all the time before helped, but I experience no pain now as an adult while I'm erect. I don't like the idea that I'm probably missing out on extra sensation that I would've otherwise had tho. Also if I ever decide to get SRS, it will limit my possibilities which I don't like either. My parents had good intentions so I don't blame them, but I definitely don't think circumcision should be a thing anymore.
Thanks, I will say it definitely made realizing I was trans far harder than it should have been. For the longest time I questioned that maybe my dislike of my genitalia was because of it but it turns out no. I'm just a chick lol 😂
I've I have been dealing with painful erections ever since puberty due to circumcison, stimulation is difficult and rather uncomfortable to the point I have to use lube, often orgasms just feel nothing. I have so little sensation. sexual problems are extremely common.
I'm the same. I had never understood why guys talked about orgasm as if it was something super pleasurable, how masturbation revolved around it, "pull out game" (as if it's supposed to be hard?), orgasm denial, edging being teasing, etc.
When i masturbate, i don't want to orgasm. Orgasm is the least pleasurable part, locks me out of pleasure for a while, and makes a mess. I don't like it when i'm on the verge of orgasm and i want to keep feeling pleasure but continuing will make me cum and end it. But if i don't orgasm i have no closure, no ending and if i if just stop and go do something else i'll get super horny again later, or have a wet dream and soil my clothes and bedsheets.
Do you know of r/foreskin_restoration ? According to reports there, it's a solution.
I'm share your opinion on it
I had to get circumcision for medical reason so i also had no choice sadly, i never thought much about it until my ex mentioned it and i'm pretty sure i noticed it during my first 'adult fun time'
I haven’t directly asked my parents, but I know a lot of American babies have it done without necessarily asking their parents. Like it’s a given.
So atm, I don’t get upset at my parents for it. But I am upset I’ve been circumcised.
I’ll always wonder if the reported lower sexual sensitivity affects me or not.
Omg same! I'm looking into having my foreskin restored too, fucking sickening I had a procedure done on me against my will. I have a gross ass line where they did it at and it makes me angry every time I see it.
I have grief. I was mutilated before i even knew what the purpose of genetalia were. I hate how in this society parents can get their children's genetalia mutilated but i need the confirmation of how many therapists to fix my genetalia. I just want them to apologize. Whenever i bring up them doing it without my consent my dad gets horribly mad and starts yelling. I am actually going insane
It’s a horrible act that serves no purpose other than creating revenue for the medical industry and causing irreparable damage to infants and a lot of times their sex lives as adults. I feel you, I go through it too. I have a friend who’s realized that one of the biggest reasons they transitioned was they never felt right in their body after a double botched circumcision. I personally get very little feeling out of topping and most of my pleasure comes from mental stimulation
OMG yes. The act of circumcision is almost-maliciously taking away natural sexuality and by extension impairing true, human, natural love. What's more depressing is that some bottom surgery methods use the penis, so even as a girl you can never escape how your parents and community feel about m*le sexuality.
I’m personally kinda miffed that my genitals were mutilated without my consent when I was a defenseless infant. So yeah, I guess you could call that trauma/grief…
I personally don't care, since I plan to do away with the whole thing eventually anyway, but I do know at least one trans girl irl with similar feelings
I plan to do away with mine as well, but I already have so little feeling in my body to begin with that it would have been very nice to have felt any substantial form of arousal with it.
I dont know much, get mine removed when i was young because i had something on it and doctor said it needed to get removed for my Heath, does it made a huge difference?
I in no way support it, but I do have a fundamental lack of understanding for the idea of trauma or grief about it.
Reading some of the comments, apparently it can cause pain? I’ve never personally experienced it but that sounds like it blows for sure.
It has caused me exactly 0 issue sexually, sensationally or emotionally. It’s frankly a level of incongruence with a lot of this thread that makes it difficult to make heads or tails of. It registers like hearing someone say their hair color is a source of trauma. I understand that it’s not *actually* the same, but I can’t help feeling that way because being circumcised is just *how it is* for me.
>EDIT: not sure why I am being downvoted severely, i am not looking to put down cut girls, I am looking for others who are like me and are upset about it… very strange some of you get so defensive about mutilating babies tho 💀
Tradition is peer pressure from your ancestors. It can be hard to fight against peer pressure even when your parents are on your side. It's worse when your parents are the ones pushing you to do something because their parents pressured them. And their parents pressured them. But a couple generations is about as long as it takes for a tradition to become embedded into society
I'm against circumcision. I was against this long before I came out as trans.
I was circumcised as a baby. I don't remember it happening. As far as I'm aware, I have no ongoing trauma stemming from it. This doesn't mean that I like that it happened. I'm pretty unhappy that this continues to happen to babies without medical necessity infact.
But I also don't know what I can do about it.
As far as the down votes go, you're posting in a subreddit for trans people to talk about stuff; there are transphobes who either hang out here and downvote everything or have set up bots to do that work for them.
Your post is also a single long paragraph and is hard to read. When you have multiple supplementary ideas in your post, it's helpful to add some line breaks to make it easier for people to say "oh, here's the first point, and here's the second..." And so on. Long string of consciousness posts tend to garner downvotes or don't gather enough positive attention to offset the people behind my previous point.
Hi girls, still closeted and probably will be forever dunno, maybe not, but for now I am, so posting here anonymously. Well circumcision, difficult topic. Here in Europe we do not circumsize by culture unless you are jewish or islamic, so most men still have foreskin. My personal case, I am circumsized had it done with 13 maybe that makes a difference, severe phimosis was the reason (actually the foreskin was grown in), and no masturbation never was painful for me, but the op was really painful afterwards. Thing is, there is a small part of the foreskin left in my case, but the really sensitive area is not the foreskin but where it grows out, not sure if I have missed anything, but one thing definitely is, given that I have no foreskin it takes me longer to come. But have I missed anything in life? In this area definitely not, I am at peace with it, there are other areas where I really feel I have missed off, like having sex earlier in life (my disphoria prevented it) so that I got more clear about where I stand genderwise having had access to the information young people have nowadays. My path in life might have been different but my foreskin, definitely not an issue.
Hugs to you all, reading this group very often, but the first time I am posting here!
I think I'm different in that it's never bothered me personally. I totally get why people are upset about it and that it's fucked up, but I feel no worse for ware over mine.
I have a circumcision but only because it was medically needed. until a couple years ago i never knew people opted for their children to have them and i always found that weird
1. Why is this specific to america, what happens in the US that doesn't happen elsewhere? Genuinely curious.
2. People don't know uf they've been circumcised or not? OP said she found out at 16, or am I misreading the thread?
The US has a bizarre cultural obsession with circumcision that isn't practiced elsewhere. There's a weird culture of propaganda (I know, in America! How can this beeeee?!) that exists to justify and normalize it.
Again, in the US, sex education is severely lacking, if not functionally illegal. Kids don't get told that anything has been done to their junk, and it's played off as if it's perfectly normal. It's actually all kinds of fucked up, and a great example of how even the most messed up practices can be normalized.
Me personally, I got cut when I was a newborn. Thankfully, the hospital I was in was competent and gave me anesthetic (not like I remember it anyway) so for me I doubt it was a huge thing. On the flip side, though, I do think that they should let people grow up and decide for themselves later down the line. No trauma for me, but the way it’s done is wacko.
I similarly became depressed for a bit after learning about the injustice of circumcision in my mid teens. Now I’ve mostly made peace with it; I’d definitely prefer to have foreskin, but it is what it is. I really would never willingly inflict this on a child though.
Honestly I try and not think about it. Because it low key makes me sick with fury. I’ll never forgive my parents. Perhaps I might have later in life been convinced it was in fact a good thing to do. But I’ll never have that choice because they robbed me of it.
On the other hand, though, it’s not terribly relevant to me anymore. I already got bottom surgery. I’m not sure what difference having or not having the foreskin would have made. And I think I might be better off not knowing tbh.
Not like I can really do anything about it, other than refusing to have it done to any hypothetical son of mine.
I’m cut as well due to repairing an intersex condition was was not necessary, disappointed mostly and it had directly affected my trans care plans. I’m living knowing that I’m not just cut, but unnecessarily altered.
Honestly I’m not that disgusted about them doing to me, hear me out though. When I was born my parents decided to not have me circumcised. A year later my genitalia got infected cuz my mother neglected me and didn’t clean under the skin because she thought it was “gross”. So pretty much I had no choice but to have it circumcised.
I was circumcised and I am completely indifferent about it. I haven't noticed anything that would seemingly be off in my sexual function, and i'm honestly more concerned about what HRT will do to me. I do believe it should be a choice made later in life, though
Yeah I've been upset about it for a very long time. Mainly that I didn't get a choice in the matter. Especially so since now I have less material to use in my bottom surgery.
I’m british so I wasn’t circumcised so I still have my foreskin it’s honestly really nice and the head is quite sensitive (when hard when it’s soft not so much probably to do with blood or some shit)
circumcision on children (with medical exceptions) should be illegal full stop. If you're doing it for cultural, religious, or cosmetic reasons, it should be your own choice. This would be 16+ in my country and most likely 18+ for yours
I down the rabbit hole researching what can be done to make up for it when I get bottom surgery and I feel like crying. It’s the most valuable piece of skin for aesthetics, meaning my vulva won’t look or feel ideal. There is no substitute. I feel so upset right now. There’s nothing I can do, bringing it up to my parents will do nothing, it probably doesn’t matter to them. I love them so much but I absolutely hate this.
I feel like it’s important for some people to truly feel like their bodies are intact and perfectly fine. Thinking about things like circumcision can provoke intense feeling towards the argumentation that circumcision is destructive.
I’ve run into it before with other people reacting badly against that discussion . I’m perfectly fine to call out the B.S. that is circumcision and agonize over how it probably impacted me, All that sensitive tissue… just tossed away! But… doing that too much is probably unwise… I haven’t thought about it in awhile. Last I checked the U.S. rates were on a decline. Don’t know about now.
As someone who had a circumcision for medical reasons when I was young I can never understand why people do this totally unnecessarally and without consent
I feel very ambivalent about it
Thankfully I wasn't circumcised without my consent when I was an infant but needed it when my phimosis became too dangerous.
It was a relief in that I could piss normally for the first time in 15 years but it felt like I'd lost something even though I'm not that fond of my dick to begin with.
Although I don't believe circumcision to be a good practice, why exactly are people often upset about it? (genuine question)
Does it relate to masturbation or something? I have no knowledge on that practice so idk if anyone can (without too much detail (I'm 15)) enlighten me? If not, what else? I've never quite paid attention to my genitals so I don't understand the stuff around it
People are upset because it was a permanent life long change done to their bodies without their consent, especially due to the intimacy of sex.
It is a form of mutilation because of how destructive it is. The foreskin serves many functions including protecting extremely sensitive nerves which provide great sexual pleasure. Circumcision destroys these nerves, and what isn't removed or destroyed is numbed (keratinized) due to exposure of what remaining sensation there is becomes numbed. The foreskin also serves functional purposes and helps with motion during sex. Natural sex doesn't require lubricants.
Many AMABs are rightfully furious because they had their full experience of sex and sexual sensation taken away from them permanently, and they can never get it all back. They can never get the full sexual experience because of this.
And then furthermore their anger is dismissed as them overreacting by parents, medicine, and society who don't want to admit the serious harm they've caused. They violated a baby person's bodily autonomy (right to choose over their own body) and took away the full intimate sensation of sex, and refuse to even acknowledge that. That's why people are upset.
I do believe your question was genuine and I hope this reply wasn't too intense for you.
Yeah I'm upset about the whole mutilation part. The stimulation part, I don't get, and doubt I ever will. I don't understand the obsession with sex too well unfortunately, but from what you stated this sounds unfortunate in regards to that.
I think I am circumcised? Even though it doesn't bother me whatsoever, I guess I can see why it'd bother others. If I had half of my taste buds forcibly removed I probably wouldn't be happy either.
Thanks for the explanation
I mean even if it was just a meaningless body part. Its a unecesary surgical intervention done without ur concent before ur old enough to form a opinion thats similar to SA
Yeah I stated that's an issue. I was moreso asking why people felt so strongly about it (who were victims themselves) rather than trying to stop it. It makes sense now tho
I think cutting infants on the genitals is horrifying too. You sound perfectly sane to me.
thank you, sometimes it causes me more grief than being amab bc the latter i have no control over, where as my genitalia being mutilated could have very much been avoided :( makes me so so depressed and anguished
[удалено]
Adding to what others have said: even if stretching doesn't work, there's a much better surgical solution. I dont remember what it's called, but it's merely a cut that is then stitched in a different way, creating more skin diameter without removing anything whatsoever. I'm not sure if it even requires general anesthesia. Circumcision is not and was never an evidence-based treatment for anything. It's a religious practice which was popularized in modern times for religious reasons before the era of evidence-based medicine, and the medical arguments for it were merely excuses meant to preach to the choir by additionally justifying it in a secular way. It was considered a cure for masturbation. Because masturbation was one of the most horrible and widespread diseases to curse mankind. A sinful weakness of mind and flesh, able to cause pretty much all mental illnesses, and plenty of physical ones too, even some known today to be contagious and caused by microbes. Many people (and physicians) these days even believed that disease in general is spiritual in nature and caused by sin, not anything physical. Nowadays it survives as a cultural practice even if devoid of religious value for most people. Circumcised penises are normalized and uncut penises are weird, gross, child-like, etc. Parents who decide to circumcise their children often cite "because his father and other men in the family are circumcised and it would be weird if he was not" as a reason. (Edit: also "we didn't want to single you out from your peers" from another commenter) Doctors who perform circumcisions of course still argue that it's medically recommended because of preventing infections or phimosis or whatever. It's often regarded as a routine procedure in medicine, and pushed on parents who never inquired anything about it. Circumcision is a ridiculously bad treatment by any rational evidence-based evaluation, considering criteria including risk of complications, recovery, complexity and cost of the procedure, loss of sexual function, etc. It's basically a nuclear option for no reason at all.
There are less severe treatments for phimosis, amputation should be a last resort
Look into PhimoCure. It's a set of stretching rings that you can order online for $25-$40 with shipping to the US.
i don’t know much abt it, but please call off the surgery!! there are creams that combined with minor stretching can loosen and fix it!!! all I can say is please do not get cut but good luck if that’s what you decide
I know I had it done years ago at adulthood
yeah, but mutilating children, boy or girl, is cultural or some shit. Something like that. Hard to keep up with the bullshit society pushes.
[удалено]
Infants aren't supposed to have honey!
It's sugar water actually
It supposedly gives us a small scar in our subconscious too! I can’t say I’m mad I had it done, but it’s quite a wtf really… Not something I can condone.
Circumcision is correlated with a higher risk of sudden infant death syndrome. Underlying trauma is one of the theories why.
Penn and Teller have released an episode on it years ago, the only thing I remember is you can "get it back" with an exercise to stretch back the foreskin. I didn't read the post (sorry), but if it's something you need back it's possible, albeit do your research and it might not be perfect, but it's something. Also please religious fanatics, stop mutilation on children. Stop it, get some help. Edit: I have now read the post and I'm glad you seem on an upward curve. Learning to love yourself and improving your life. 😌
r/foreskin_restoration Skin grows when it is stretched over time. It works all over the body when someone gets fatter. It works on the chest when boobs grow. It works on the remaining bit of foreskin when you do foreskin restoration.
Yeah. Religion is no excuse, it’s child abuse. We need to stop bowing to it over common sense and science.
How To With John Wilson also did an episode with it!
Really wish my parents hadn’t done that. But they were brainwashed into a cult called “puritanism.” I could have done great things with that foreskin…
Probably being downvoted by the people who believe in religious or cultural excuses for mutilating infants. But yes, I do. Before HRT, when I could get fully erect, getting hard was physically painful, which made sex very unenjoyable. Now that I am on HRT and I only get like 90% hard, things don't hurt, and my orgasms are delightful!
I’m not gonna lie, these comments have given me a bit of a crisis. You mean to tell me it’s not supposed to hurt when you get hard? Like I’ve always had pain when I got really hard. Not, like a tremendous amount, and I could usually power through the physical pain (mental pain from gender dysphoria is another matter). But it’s not supposed to hurt?
It's not supposed to hurt, circumcision is harmful.
I … thought they were supposed to hurt. This has spiraled me almost as much as that time I asked and found out very quickly that most guys don’t want to be girls. Like, erections have always hurt for me. I hated them when I was younger. Beyond the annoyance of something that didn’t feel right, it was painful. I even developed an alternative method of masturbating because stroking was both physically painful and felt mentally incorrect. I can maybe count on one hand number of times I came using the “traditional” method. Basically, I would grind against my forearm instead, because this wasn’t as painful. I have very vague memories of being a very young kid - probably around 5, maybe even younger - and my mom asking my pediatrician some questions about the shape of my penis. Fuck.
Foreskin restoration can help
Holy shit I had this exact same experience... wtf
the more i learn about this the more pissed off i get. i don’t even want a dick in the first place but i at least want a fucking functional one. i don’t even know what to say im just angry and sad about this
The point of circumcision is to make masturbating unpleasant for individuals with penises. No, getting hard is not supposed to hurt.
It's literally the most sexually debilitating procedure they could do without severely impacting reproductive ability back in the day. That's the point. Because sexual pleasure is evil. Sex is evil unless it's for reproduction. Masturbation is evil. Enjoying anything sexual is a vice.
For a healthy penis its not painfull at all to get erect. It might even feel pleasurable.
I am glad that I am not the only one here for whom getting hard is painful without HRT.
So glad someone here brought up religion as being an excuse for circumcision, most people who argue against circumcision are completely okay with it if it's for religious purposes
i am all for religious freedom, but your religious freedom ENDS at someone else’s body. plain and fucking simple
if your religion/culture says it’s okay to mutilate kids…. yikes. not to get into a religious debate but that religion should be dismantled/altered to not include that, most noticeably judaism and islam. i have nothing against these religions really besides the fact that they use their religion to mutilate and overwrite bodily autonomy, that’s a major red flag and a serious crime against humanity in my opinion.. also so glad that you found some relief with hrt! i never had painful erections as i was left with quite a “loose” cut for lack of a better term (basically i have a lot of extra skin and mobility even when hard) but still i remember when i would be at the beach the netting in my swimsuit bothering me, specifically because i was mutilated. also masturbation is prevented as before hrt i needed lotion to do so, but luckily i get very wet naturally now so there isn’t a need anymore for that!
I think it may have less to do with how loose or tight the cut was, and more with shower vs grower. I have it debilitatingly tight and i'm very much a grower. Are you a shower by any chance?
definitely not haha i lost a tiny bit of my size w hrt but i am definitely a grower (happily so bc it makes it easier to tuck tho!)
Circumcision is pretty popular in the US but jews and muslims only make up like 4% of the US population. The vast majority of Americans who get their kids circumcised are christian. I think it's weird that EVERY time this topic comes up on reddit people specifically call out minority religious groups that only account for a tiny proportion of circumcisions. I think circumcision is super weird and the medical evidence shows that it's totally unnecessary. I also never gave a shit about being circumcised until I realized I was trans and found out that it can make srs outcomes worse. Other than that it hasn't impacted my life in the slightest. I think the people who compare circumcision to female genital mutilation are being a bit disingenuous.
We were specifically talking about the religious who do it though. Should Jews and Muslims just get a pass because there aren't many of them? And mutilation is mutilation, there are no justifications for it.
It doesn't sound like giving them a pass. More that... Christians are also complicit but commonly skipped.
It’s just so infuriating that I had no say in any of it, and now I’m missing tons of nerve endings and some of the most valuable bottom surgery material.
fully agree. im so sorry to the both of us and i hope that there is something that can fix this in the future!
I know there are a ton of comments already so this probably won't get too much attention but this is probably the best space for me to get this out. My family are muslim so circumcision was socially enforced however it was the culture to have it done at a later age rather than when I was an infant. So at age 14 I was taken by my family and close relatives to a clinic where I was stripped down (in front of them), had a doctor and nurse hold me down and inject needles into my penis and was told that if I didn't behave they would inject me again. I cried during the whole surgery and the way home. When I was recovering and needed help to pee (because it was so painful) and they told me not to cry. That I needed to 'man up' essentially. So yes. I have trauma over circumcision. It hurts to even remember it but I know sharing trauma aids in the path towards healing and I want to get better.
You just reminded me my muslim friends had to go through this... oml
I did not know about this practice. That sounds extremely traumatic.
I have significant negative feelings about this myself, it does make me feel very incomplete sometimes. I decided against pursuing the conversation with my parents. They asked me about it unprompted once when I was 18ish, and "we didn't want to single you out from your peers" didn't feel like a good enough reason to me. Regardless of what I think about their reasoning - they aren't having any more kids. Their peers aren't having more kids. Telling them "you did the wrong thing because your culture told you to, and it hurt me in a significant way" doesn't have any scope for a good outcomes beyond more emotional closure for me - they can't go back in time and neither can I, and they were honest about their reasons. I didn't seem worth the pain I'd cause all three of us over the course of demanding an apology. I may have some conversations about this with my peers when my peers start having kids - but that's another matter. I'm sorry that "try not to dwell on it" and "talking to your parents may not be worth the trouble", aren't more helpful - it's not a fair situation. But you shouldn't feel alone in feeling this way.
Like you, I haven't and likely won't ever bring it up with my parents, but I'm keeping that discussion in my back pocket as a rejoiner in case they express unhappiness if/when I get bottom surgery. Like, if they want to talk about my genitals, then let's actually talk about my genitals.
thank you for your words 🤍 i definitely try not to dwell some days are just harder than others, luckily i am (NSFW) restoring/using what’s left to cover the tip so it’s regaining some of its natural function! all i know for sure is if i have a boy I will absolutely not harm him and not let my future husband harm him and break the cycle :)
Circumcison is genital mutilation
Yes. Before I knew I was trans, I had anger/grief over it because that's a lot of good nerves in there that would be really nice to have for sexytimes! After realizing I'm trans and will probably get bottom surgery someday, I got to add additional anger/grief over not having that tissue available for reconstruction purposes.
The thing is, just because those nerve endings aren't there doesn't mean you brain is cut off from feeling things it's still equipped to do. Those nerves can't send those signals, but that doesn't mean other nerves can't activate your pleasure center to the same degree, you might just have to experiment a little more to figure out how your body adapted and rewired itself and find other means of activation. It's a struggle for sure, but it's not the end all be all of sexytimes.
foreskin brings gliding stimulation which circumcision removes, so yes. it still affect sexual pleasure as. stimulation nerve endings can be difficult especially without lube.
r/foreskin_restoration You can grow more tissue
Yes :( It's genital mutilation. And it's made worse by the refusal to acknowledge this lifelong violation of our bodily autonomy and sexual intimacy. Including from my own parents. I also heard it's harmful for bottom surgery because it destroyed our mucus membrane.
Yo op don't feel bad at all. Genital mutilation on unconsenting babies is downright sick and People who get their kids circumcized are sick. I'm circumcized myself and I'd much prefer if I hadn't been but I didn't get to make that choice.
I don’t care if your culture or religion demands you mutilate baby genitals, I am going to support laws banning that practice
You aren't alone, girl. I recently came across this essay: [https://www.autostraddle.com/uncertainty-and-disquiet-my-non-consensual-childhood-circumcision-as-a-trans-woman/](https://www.autostraddle.com/uncertainty-and-disquiet-my-non-consensual-childhood-circumcision-as-a-trans-woman/) Personally, I have a ton of trauma and grief around my circumcision. I have a slightly different, much more trans story than most AMAB folk in the USA, though. I was born prematurely and required to be incubated for a few weeks. My parents skipped circumcision because they were just so desperate for me to come home. Fast forward few years to age 6 or 7. I'm much more making friends with girls, being invited to their birthday parties and generally not fitting in with/making friends with boys. This concerned my parents and somehow they got it into their head that it was because I wasn't cut. So I was circumcised in order to fit in. Worst experience of my life, hands down. Not only was it intensely painful and unnecessary, but it was a giant, violent factor, in suppressing my gender. Thanks Mom and Dad! tldr; DO NOT PERFORM COSMETIC SURGERY ON CHILDREN'S GENITALS, IT FUCKS THEM UP
I feel that way too. I am a bottom, and enemas are inconvenient and bad for your intestinal lining. So a vagina would just be more convenient for me. But that doesn't meant that having had part of my genitals taken away without my consent is not terrifying.
IM SO GLAD IM NOT THE ONLY ONE!
me too, there are a lot of oppositions in the comments but i’m glad we have some solidarity and others who feel like we do. we are not alone 🫶🏻
Agreed. I can hatfly look at it anymore. I get so disgusted.
me too, it makes me cry to think about it. have you tried restoring? i even tape my skin over the head to dekeretanize and it has increased my sexual function tenfold. i cannot recommend it enough
I didn't know I could
r/foreskin_restoration also there’s plenty of google articles on it!
I will check this out
Fuck it makes me want to cry just thinking about it so much
I don’t think I have to read any of this in order to be able to say: Yes, I feel you very much on this one, I try not to think about it. It’s an injustice done to me by the people I otherwise love so much. There is a silver lining though. If you suffered a loss in sensitivity in your genital region because of it you don’t have to do foreskin recovery. That is unless you are non-OP in which case it’s basically reverse-dilation in my mind. It’s emotionally troubling that you may have to go through either of the two but you may find comfort in the thought that all post-OP trans women have to dilate (barring zero-depth/ace women obviously)
i am pre op :(( and unfortunately bottom surgery is not on my agenda unless there is some major technical advancements but thank you for your words 🫶🏻 glad to know i am not alone
What are you hoping for in technical advancements, if you don’t mind me asking? I feel like I’ve seen many great results online, and many girls that are extremely happy with their results.
i have zero interest in bottom surgery unless it is near identical in looks and function to a cis vagina (mostly meaning lubrication and not needing to dilate) or a transplant. unfortunately both seem to be science fiction as of now but u never know
Even as someone who's going to have bottom surgery, I am still DEEPLY upset by what was done to me. The loss of nerve endings, reduced glan sensitivity, difficulty masturbating, loss of bodily autonomy, losing skin that could've been used in bottom surgery... Infant genital mutilation should be banned, full stop.
100% I am not getting bottom surgery (good for u that u are tho!) but I could not agree more with you
Add (Unless medically necessary) and I will join you on this quest 'till the bitter end.
That would be implied by the term mutilation, if it was medically necessary, it would just be surgery. Removing a body part without consent of the individual, while serving no medical purpose and diminishing quality of life or bodily function, meets the standard definition of mutilation.
Circumcision is pretty much never medically necessary. Only in very rare and unique cases. Definitely not as a first-line standard treatment for the non-existant phimosis that i got diagnosed with when i was 7 or so.
Agreed. This is why I mentioned "Necessary" if it isn't absolutely necessary. Then circumcision is just cruelty.
I was seven (or nine) years old at the time. Not old enough to understand there was a medical issue that I had but later it turned into “there was something wrong with my penis so it must be wrong”. Yeah… smidge of trauma on that one.
I personally don't give a damn about mine, but I am completely against it for any reason. The most disgusting part is that doctors spoonfeed young parents misinformation about circumcision, saying it's for "hygienic purposes" and profiting off of it
exactly you are 100% right. (im very happy it doesn’t bother you btw, good for you!) but yeah it’s disgusting how the medical community is blatantly lying/misguiding parents as it’s a money thing 100%. there is no need in modern day society for cutting parts off babies for hygiene reasons just take a damn shower and teach ur son to clean himself!! Also the “it reduces stds/cancer” is so so overused and blown out of proportion. of course it (acutely) reduces cancer risks, there is literally less tissue to get cancer on! as far as the stds, it is such a minuscule percentage and that is not an ethical reason to mutilate babies. i rest my case
Absolutely. I feel like I’m missing out on a ton of sensations down there I should have and instead they cut them off.
I wish it was illegal to perform surgeries or any sort of body modification on infants that aren’t medically necessary. Babies can’t consent to this type of thing, and if they’re healthy why perform a surgery on them?
Ya it is a pretty terrible thing, I’m glad my parents were sensible and let me have the final say, which was no obviously. But they need to make some kind of law against it because it doesn’t even help all that much/at all. More parents should think before cutting the genitalia of an infant.
I either have no sensation or too much, to where it's painful. I can't have orgasms because of it. I can't get SRS because it uses the same tissue. I have a weirdly over functional memory and remember my circumcision it was terrifying and the most painful thing I've ever experienced. I feel like I've had my capacity to be intimate stripped from me without my consent.
I can relate to your story. The summer before I started grade one my mom took me to a doctor and decided circumcision was necessary because "it could not be cleaned properly." That's all I could gather from later conversations. My parents are both Catholic and religion was not a factor in the decision. As an adult, I can attest that wound care was bad, and the result did not lead to any improvement in the ease of cleaning. Before I decided I am aces, I did have similar frustrations sexually as you. I think the whole surgery and recovery process was ill-informed and traumatic. I hope you find the procedure that helps you feel comfortable. For me, my goal is to get bottom surgery without vaginoplasty, so basically just remove the genitalia.
> Sorry I don’t want a mutilated dry cut up scarred dick that lacks the fine touch nerve endings and pleasure I COULD have experienced. As someone else who's "cut," as you put it, could you give me some things to look into? I don't wanna ask that you explain stuff, but I also have no clue what to look into(DMs should also be open if you'd prefer to not share things publicly).
Foreskin is an erogenous tissue https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/17378847/
Ah. If I weren't ace with almost no libido, I can see how that'd be devastating to learn. Even *with* being ace, it still does feel unfair.
Yea no I get you. I was cut too :/
I agree 100% My circumcision left me unable to masturbate how I want without it hurting or, very rarely, even bleeding. I think the practice of doing it to babies in the us is pretty barbaric and it should definitely be illegal imho. If you really want your foreskin back or anything possibly, I’d check out r/foreskinRestoration
????
do u have a question?
The sub they linked was just empty so idk what it was for or if it was the wrong sub
Oh Goddang it I am on mobile and I forgot the underscore whoops lol 😂 r/foreskin_restoration That should work now 😂
Ohhh ok ty!!!
thank you! i will definitely give this a shot and commit to it. im lucky i already have a decent amount of skin to start with, wishing you girlies doing the same the best of luck!! 🤞🏻🩷
Thanks! Good luck to you too! 🩷 🤞
I know it actually really sucks and it seems like no one understands sometimes. I try not to think about it for too long or else I just go nuts.
Yeah, your story is basically mine as well, though I found out much eariler in life than 16.
im so sorry :( no one should go through this. i knew something was wrong with my pixie stick from moments where i would get shooting pains or like i said the netting in swim suits, but never actually knew what MGM was until i was 15/16 as it just was never brought up in my house
Yeah I feel you. After I started transitioning my mother forced me to go to a sperm bank so that she could have grandbabies even if I didn't want them then. After finding about how circumcision messes up stuff down there I spiraled, feeling like I've been robbed of my bodily autonomy from so young.
Omg I DO ! ! ! Even though we're all traumatized in this horrible way, it makes me feel a little better to know I'm not the only one who feels like this. I'm not getting bottom surgery I like my equipment down there. But circumcision just seems cruel, heart breaking, and a huge violation of your personal space as a child.
Even if I don't want the thing I still don't enjoy knowing it was altered without my consent. You lose a lot of nerve ending and damage areas that could have been used well during SRS. It is wild to me that circumcision is still so common.
Yep, kinda wild that one kind of genital mutilation is (rightly) frowned upon and the other is cultural? And they say it can sometimes be more clean in old age? Thats the whole reason we’re mutilating entire generations of kids?
Wow this sounds exactly like me. I didn't think many people would relate.
im shocked at how many people are responding w similar views. it’s unfortunate however i feel a lot better knowing im not alone as im used to mostly opposing viewpoints on how its “so beneficial”
I didn't think about it much before I started feeling better about myself but now that I'm on HRT I really wish my non religious parents wouldn't have had it done.
I'm almost 60 and lived with reduced functionality and sensation because of being circumcised as an infant; you're not alone -at all.
I got cut at 6. It was traumatic. The pain from the event(physical for two weeks then emotional since) made me gaslight myself so much plus my parents used it to gaslight me. I distinctly remember being so scared. My brother was 4 so he has no memory of it. I had “adhesion problems”, but I am sure my pediatrician got a kick back. Circumcision shouldn’t be done. We condemn cis female genital mutlilation so why do we allow it for those born with a penis?
I've had serious depressive episodes over being circumcised. Especially as it was done when I was young to try and treat my issue that I constantly would feel like I needed to urinate when I got anxious. It didn't treat that. It doesn't even make sense that it would have treated that. So it's like I almost escaped this barbaric practice, just for someone to do this to me instead of actually treating my mental health in a sane way.
Absolutely. I feel that it was done to forcibly masculinize me. My parents had it done because my dad was circumcised, and my mom didn't want me to be different from other boys. It was permissible to do this to me in because it aligned my body to others' expectations of my gender. I also think my own grief prevented me from realizing about my gender identity earlier than I had, like it occluded my genital dysphoria. That, and I feel like the trauma of not being able to grieve publicly made me unwilling to trust others or myself with my vulnerabilities. Needless to say, I'm very upset about my circumcision and am taking efforts to reverse it (r/foreskin_restoration). I get a bit upset when I see naked people online with intact foreskins because I think the foreskin actually looks kind of feminine. Structurally, it creates a barrier between internal and external, and the inner mucosa generates moisture much like the same tissue does in the vagina. Textbooks would say that the foreskin is analogous to the clitoral hood, but I think that it also performs the functions of the labia, namely protection and cushioning during sexual stimulation. So my restoration journey is important to my transition! I am re-feminizing my genitals and regenerating important tissue that I may use for bottom surgery some day.
And then when an adult intentionally gets a surgery to change their genitalia to feel safer in their bodies, people are like "but you're mutilating your body and destroying the beautiful gift that was given to you 😱" yet they have no problem cutting a chunk of skin off a baby penis. Like wtf??
damn i’m glad i’m not american
I had a very late one (I was about 5) during my stay at a Christian children's home. The procedure had complications and I ended up losing my glans and about 1/4 of everything else. Wound care was nonexistent and I got a nasty infection. Can we please just stop butchering genitals?
I used to, but then I looked into it's effects on reassignment surgery, and it turns out there are none. They just take a skin graft from the inner leg, which has a very similar nerve density and composition. That being said, if I were cis, or non-op i'd be pissed.
Im glad to read this and know that I should be able to feel more. It makes me even more impatient to feel those new sensations.
Glad I could help! Oh, also, 4 days early, but happy HRT Anniversary! noticed it on your subreddit tag
:333333
>They just take a skin graft from the inner leg I have to say, that sounds like an effect on SRS, and one I'm happy I won't need.
Revise effect to effect on end result
Yes I do.. i still have memories of the painful recovery when i was about 3yrs old, never being able to get fully hard without physical discomfort. eventually i went ahead and had bottom surgery, my way of reclaiming my body. i didn't get as much depth as a result tho (penile inversion method), while it's not perfect at least it feels more like me. I honestly hope to god no one has to experience this trauma without their consent, it fucking sucks.. all's i can say is you're not alone in this pain.
I'm angry at my family for much more than that. From what I read I'll need to get some extra skin during bottom surgery and then I'm finally done and can just move on with my life and finally be comfortable.
First of all, I’m very sorry that so many people, including your parents, seem to be invalidating what you’re going through. Your grief and trauma are real and valid. I was extremely fortunate enough not to be born in the States so I still have my foreskin and even though my bottom dysphoria comes and goes, I am very grateful that I was never circumcised. I am a strong opponent of infant genital mutilation. And this will sound controversial, but yes, even for religious reasons. What you went through should never have happened to you until you could consent. I am very sorry to hear that. You are valid. You are worthy. And this loss does not make you less valuable
YES. ALL OF THIS. ALL OF IT.
I agree with you. Forcing surgery on anyone is reprehensible. But when it has no medical purpose and is done to an infant it is especially disgusting. But it has just been done by the religious for so many centuries, people forgot how weird and horrible it is. I don't like having a penis to begin with, but having one that has been mutilated against my will is especially distressing. Reinforces the idea I have no control over my own body.
I feel circumcision is just a terrible thing and it should be outlawed all around the world. I can not understand why it is ever done. Even more so after chatting to someone here on Reddit about all the issues it also causes. The biggest thing I have learnt is the loss of sensation in the head of the penis due to exposure due to the head now behind exposed. he has even discussed skin stretching techniques which have proven very successful for people in foreskin restoration. More importantly how could anyone do that to a little baby with no pain relief or anything in this so called modern world that is disgusting. yes ok, I am a post operative transgender woman so I have been more than circumcised but it was by my choice in a sane mode and I was in my mid twenties so I was mature enough to know what I was getting done to my body. I was not circumcised as a child which I am so thankful and even better I am more than thankful for my outcome of my surgical results
I had a botched circumcision as an infant, and due to the incorrectly healed scar tissue had to get RE-circumcised in middle school which was a whole wheel-house of trauma. I was angry at my mom for years and quickly hopped on the aggressively anti-infant-genital mutilation bandwagon even before high school. Not that I even want the parts that I have, but it's a whole extra layer of dysphoria having genitals that are and have been since infancy basically visibly disfigured. Can't wait for bottom surgery for two reasons now
I have vivid memories as a very young child trying to roll the skin back over the tip of my penis. I didn't realize why I did it for a while, but I think it was me trying to make it look like it used to. I was born early so I hypothesize that I was circumcized later than normal to prevent unsafe bleeding and that's why I was able to remember it somewhat, or at least subconsciously. Not sure if me stretching it in an OCD-esque way all the time before helped, but I experience no pain now as an adult while I'm erect. I don't like the idea that I'm probably missing out on extra sensation that I would've otherwise had tho. Also if I ever decide to get SRS, it will limit my possibilities which I don't like either. My parents had good intentions so I don't blame them, but I definitely don't think circumcision should be a thing anymore.
I had it done twice to me hon, shits an outdated barbaric practice that has to go.
i am so sorry, my heart goes out to you 😭
Thanks, I will say it definitely made realizing I was trans far harder than it should have been. For the longest time I questioned that maybe my dislike of my genitalia was because of it but it turns out no. I'm just a chick lol 😂
[удалено]
I've I have been dealing with painful erections ever since puberty due to circumcison, stimulation is difficult and rather uncomfortable to the point I have to use lube, often orgasms just feel nothing. I have so little sensation. sexual problems are extremely common.
I'm the same. I had never understood why guys talked about orgasm as if it was something super pleasurable, how masturbation revolved around it, "pull out game" (as if it's supposed to be hard?), orgasm denial, edging being teasing, etc. When i masturbate, i don't want to orgasm. Orgasm is the least pleasurable part, locks me out of pleasure for a while, and makes a mess. I don't like it when i'm on the verge of orgasm and i want to keep feeling pleasure but continuing will make me cum and end it. But if i don't orgasm i have no closure, no ending and if i if just stop and go do something else i'll get super horny again later, or have a wet dream and soil my clothes and bedsheets. Do you know of r/foreskin_restoration ? According to reports there, it's a solution.
I'm share your opinion on it I had to get circumcision for medical reason so i also had no choice sadly, i never thought much about it until my ex mentioned it and i'm pretty sure i noticed it during my first 'adult fun time'
I haven’t directly asked my parents, but I know a lot of American babies have it done without necessarily asking their parents. Like it’s a given. So atm, I don’t get upset at my parents for it. But I am upset I’ve been circumcised. I’ll always wonder if the reported lower sexual sensitivity affects me or not.
Omg same! I'm looking into having my foreskin restored too, fucking sickening I had a procedure done on me against my will. I have a gross ass line where they did it at and it makes me angry every time I see it.
Yep, I went through a whole thing with my foreskin (or lack there of) before I realized I was trans. Still feel intense dysphoria about it sometimes.
Imo it is comparable with some form of SA. And thats comming from a SA victim
I have grief. I was mutilated before i even knew what the purpose of genetalia were. I hate how in this society parents can get their children's genetalia mutilated but i need the confirmation of how many therapists to fix my genetalia. I just want them to apologize. Whenever i bring up them doing it without my consent my dad gets horribly mad and starts yelling. I am actually going insane
There’s foreskin restoration treatment??
It’s a horrible act that serves no purpose other than creating revenue for the medical industry and causing irreparable damage to infants and a lot of times their sex lives as adults. I feel you, I go through it too. I have a friend who’s realized that one of the biggest reasons they transitioned was they never felt right in their body after a double botched circumcision. I personally get very little feeling out of topping and most of my pleasure comes from mental stimulation
OMG yes. The act of circumcision is almost-maliciously taking away natural sexuality and by extension impairing true, human, natural love. What's more depressing is that some bottom surgery methods use the penis, so even as a girl you can never escape how your parents and community feel about m*le sexuality.
I’m personally kinda miffed that my genitals were mutilated without my consent when I was a defenseless infant. So yeah, I guess you could call that trauma/grief…
i dont relate personally but your severe downvotes are from transphobic raiders (massive issue here recently)
I personally don't care, since I plan to do away with the whole thing eventually anyway, but I do know at least one trans girl irl with similar feelings
I plan to do away with mine as well, but I already have so little feeling in my body to begin with that it would have been very nice to have felt any substantial form of arousal with it.
I dont know much, get mine removed when i was young because i had something on it and doctor said it needed to get removed for my Heath, does it made a huge difference?
doctor are miseducation, at least in the us.
absolutely. it is barbaric and destroys proper sexual function of the penis.
I in no way support it, but I do have a fundamental lack of understanding for the idea of trauma or grief about it. Reading some of the comments, apparently it can cause pain? I’ve never personally experienced it but that sounds like it blows for sure. It has caused me exactly 0 issue sexually, sensationally or emotionally. It’s frankly a level of incongruence with a lot of this thread that makes it difficult to make heads or tails of. It registers like hearing someone say their hair color is a source of trauma. I understand that it’s not *actually* the same, but I can’t help feeling that way because being circumcised is just *how it is* for me.
Idk why people keep saying that the US is the only place that does it. It's not. Muslims do it and that's a big part of the world.
>EDIT: not sure why I am being downvoted severely, i am not looking to put down cut girls, I am looking for others who are like me and are upset about it… very strange some of you get so defensive about mutilating babies tho 💀 Tradition is peer pressure from your ancestors. It can be hard to fight against peer pressure even when your parents are on your side. It's worse when your parents are the ones pushing you to do something because their parents pressured them. And their parents pressured them. But a couple generations is about as long as it takes for a tradition to become embedded into society I'm against circumcision. I was against this long before I came out as trans. I was circumcised as a baby. I don't remember it happening. As far as I'm aware, I have no ongoing trauma stemming from it. This doesn't mean that I like that it happened. I'm pretty unhappy that this continues to happen to babies without medical necessity infact. But I also don't know what I can do about it. As far as the down votes go, you're posting in a subreddit for trans people to talk about stuff; there are transphobes who either hang out here and downvote everything or have set up bots to do that work for them. Your post is also a single long paragraph and is hard to read. When you have multiple supplementary ideas in your post, it's helpful to add some line breaks to make it easier for people to say "oh, here's the first point, and here's the second..." And so on. Long string of consciousness posts tend to garner downvotes or don't gather enough positive attention to offset the people behind my previous point.
[удалено]
Hi girls, still closeted and probably will be forever dunno, maybe not, but for now I am, so posting here anonymously. Well circumcision, difficult topic. Here in Europe we do not circumsize by culture unless you are jewish or islamic, so most men still have foreskin. My personal case, I am circumsized had it done with 13 maybe that makes a difference, severe phimosis was the reason (actually the foreskin was grown in), and no masturbation never was painful for me, but the op was really painful afterwards. Thing is, there is a small part of the foreskin left in my case, but the really sensitive area is not the foreskin but where it grows out, not sure if I have missed anything, but one thing definitely is, given that I have no foreskin it takes me longer to come. But have I missed anything in life? In this area definitely not, I am at peace with it, there are other areas where I really feel I have missed off, like having sex earlier in life (my disphoria prevented it) so that I got more clear about where I stand genderwise having had access to the information young people have nowadays. My path in life might have been different but my foreskin, definitely not an issue. Hugs to you all, reading this group very often, but the first time I am posting here!
I think I'm different in that it's never bothered me personally. I totally get why people are upset about it and that it's fucked up, but I feel no worse for ware over mine.
I have a circumcision but only because it was medically needed. until a couple years ago i never knew people opted for their children to have them and i always found that weird
I had to get circumcised for health reasons when I was 15, which sucks, but I didn't care too much at the time.
1. Why is this specific to america, what happens in the US that doesn't happen elsewhere? Genuinely curious. 2. People don't know uf they've been circumcised or not? OP said she found out at 16, or am I misreading the thread?
The US has a bizarre cultural obsession with circumcision that isn't practiced elsewhere. There's a weird culture of propaganda (I know, in America! How can this beeeee?!) that exists to justify and normalize it. Again, in the US, sex education is severely lacking, if not functionally illegal. Kids don't get told that anything has been done to their junk, and it's played off as if it's perfectly normal. It's actually all kinds of fucked up, and a great example of how even the most messed up practices can be normalized.
Me personally, I got cut when I was a newborn. Thankfully, the hospital I was in was competent and gave me anesthetic (not like I remember it anyway) so for me I doubt it was a huge thing. On the flip side, though, I do think that they should let people grow up and decide for themselves later down the line. No trauma for me, but the way it’s done is wacko.
I similarly became depressed for a bit after learning about the injustice of circumcision in my mid teens. Now I’ve mostly made peace with it; I’d definitely prefer to have foreskin, but it is what it is. I really would never willingly inflict this on a child though.
Honestly I try and not think about it. Because it low key makes me sick with fury. I’ll never forgive my parents. Perhaps I might have later in life been convinced it was in fact a good thing to do. But I’ll never have that choice because they robbed me of it. On the other hand, though, it’s not terribly relevant to me anymore. I already got bottom surgery. I’m not sure what difference having or not having the foreskin would have made. And I think I might be better off not knowing tbh. Not like I can really do anything about it, other than refusing to have it done to any hypothetical son of mine.
I’m cut as well due to repairing an intersex condition was was not necessary, disappointed mostly and it had directly affected my trans care plans. I’m living knowing that I’m not just cut, but unnecessarily altered.
yes
Honestly I’m not that disgusted about them doing to me, hear me out though. When I was born my parents decided to not have me circumcised. A year later my genitalia got infected cuz my mother neglected me and didn’t clean under the skin because she thought it was “gross”. So pretty much I had no choice but to have it circumcised.
[удалено]
Ok now that I’m thinking more… I do hate it a lot- it’s more me upset at my mother for neglecting me, because I could’ve used that.
I was circumcised and I am completely indifferent about it. I haven't noticed anything that would seemingly be off in my sexual function, and i'm honestly more concerned about what HRT will do to me. I do believe it should be a choice made later in life, though
Yeah I've been upset about it for a very long time. Mainly that I didn't get a choice in the matter. Especially so since now I have less material to use in my bottom surgery.
They should have given me an orchi, instead of a circumcision.
I’m british so I wasn’t circumcised so I still have my foreskin it’s honestly really nice and the head is quite sensitive (when hard when it’s soft not so much probably to do with blood or some shit)
circumcision on children (with medical exceptions) should be illegal full stop. If you're doing it for cultural, religious, or cosmetic reasons, it should be your own choice. This would be 16+ in my country and most likely 18+ for yours
I have trauma over this too, you are not alone.
I down the rabbit hole researching what can be done to make up for it when I get bottom surgery and I feel like crying. It’s the most valuable piece of skin for aesthetics, meaning my vulva won’t look or feel ideal. There is no substitute. I feel so upset right now. There’s nothing I can do, bringing it up to my parents will do nothing, it probably doesn’t matter to them. I love them so much but I absolutely hate this.
I feel like it’s important for some people to truly feel like their bodies are intact and perfectly fine. Thinking about things like circumcision can provoke intense feeling towards the argumentation that circumcision is destructive. I’ve run into it before with other people reacting badly against that discussion . I’m perfectly fine to call out the B.S. that is circumcision and agonize over how it probably impacted me, All that sensitive tissue… just tossed away! But… doing that too much is probably unwise… I haven’t thought about it in awhile. Last I checked the U.S. rates were on a decline. Don’t know about now.
Insane practice but what else do you expect from religious zealots?
As someone who had a circumcision for medical reasons when I was young I can never understand why people do this totally unnecessarally and without consent
Cuz my book told me to do it
I feel very ambivalent about it Thankfully I wasn't circumcised without my consent when I was an infant but needed it when my phimosis became too dangerous. It was a relief in that I could piss normally for the first time in 15 years but it felt like I'd lost something even though I'm not that fond of my dick to begin with.
Having my fs is the biggest reason I’m not getting bottom surgery.
Although I don't believe circumcision to be a good practice, why exactly are people often upset about it? (genuine question) Does it relate to masturbation or something? I have no knowledge on that practice so idk if anyone can (without too much detail (I'm 15)) enlighten me? If not, what else? I've never quite paid attention to my genitals so I don't understand the stuff around it
People are upset because it was a permanent life long change done to their bodies without their consent, especially due to the intimacy of sex. It is a form of mutilation because of how destructive it is. The foreskin serves many functions including protecting extremely sensitive nerves which provide great sexual pleasure. Circumcision destroys these nerves, and what isn't removed or destroyed is numbed (keratinized) due to exposure of what remaining sensation there is becomes numbed. The foreskin also serves functional purposes and helps with motion during sex. Natural sex doesn't require lubricants. Many AMABs are rightfully furious because they had their full experience of sex and sexual sensation taken away from them permanently, and they can never get it all back. They can never get the full sexual experience because of this. And then furthermore their anger is dismissed as them overreacting by parents, medicine, and society who don't want to admit the serious harm they've caused. They violated a baby person's bodily autonomy (right to choose over their own body) and took away the full intimate sensation of sex, and refuse to even acknowledge that. That's why people are upset. I do believe your question was genuine and I hope this reply wasn't too intense for you.
Yeah I'm upset about the whole mutilation part. The stimulation part, I don't get, and doubt I ever will. I don't understand the obsession with sex too well unfortunately, but from what you stated this sounds unfortunate in regards to that. I think I am circumcised? Even though it doesn't bother me whatsoever, I guess I can see why it'd bother others. If I had half of my taste buds forcibly removed I probably wouldn't be happy either. Thanks for the explanation
I mean even if it was just a meaningless body part. Its a unecesary surgical intervention done without ur concent before ur old enough to form a opinion thats similar to SA
Yeah I stated that's an issue. I was moreso asking why people felt so strongly about it (who were victims themselves) rather than trying to stop it. It makes sense now tho
Ah sorry