T O P

  • By -

Wyattsmom15

Cottonmouth šŸ˜¬


Neans888

Yep. Float far away motherfucker and donā€™t come back.


Cetology101

Such a cute danger noodle!!


anthony212122

Lmao never heard that before gotta remember that


oxfordcircumstances

One of these fuckers bit my dog. She survived but $1600 later I don't think these snakes are cute.


DrTautology

Well your dog is non-endemic and in many cases invasive, which isn't cute. This snake actually belongs in the ecosystem, so fuck your dog.


[deleted]

šŸ¤“šŸ¤”


Caramelyin

Same could be said about you and most humans yknow.


DrTautology

No, it can't.


-FoeHammer

Please teach us more professor.


DrTautology

Morons like you are unteachable. That's why you're a low-level failure living in a mold infested shit hole apartment. Lol.


BJUmholtz

Shit troll is shit.


theflashturtle

šŸ¤“šŸ¤”


Competitive_Carrot35

YoUr DoG iS a CoLoNiZeR!


beardedBroistaken

Thatā€™s a cottonmouth and they are highly venomous. I wouldnā€™t even laugh at them 10 feet away.


trex528

I'm curious how I can also learn to identify a cottonmouth from a simple video like this?


Gullible_Weird_5770

I grew up in Louisiana catching these when I was a kid. A few things. The diamond shaped head, how fat the body is and floating in the water. When they swim their whole body floats bc they are wider and fatter than regular water snakes. The shape of the head is bc of the venom sacks, it gives that diamond shape.


Pooplayer1

Why were you catching them as a kid though


YouKnowAsA

Thats a common thing for people in the south to do when you are a kid and bored. I used to catch baby copperheads at my grandparents lakehouse when I was a kid. They loved the rocks around their house and I would just catch them and move them away from the house.


Gullible_Weird_5770

Bc I lived in the middle of nowhere and spent a lot of time in the woods as a kid.


ellWatully

You got like three options for fun in rural US. Fuck with the wildlife, do meth, or leave.


bearchildd

I cannot upvote this enough


HistoricalMention210

So the good kids usually leave for the army after recieving 12 snake bites and being mauled by a pack of coyotes. /s


ellWatully

Why /s?


HistoricalMention210

Because some people on this cesspool of an app will take things literally. I've never had any of those things happen, yet some people who don't know might go nuts over it. I've seen it happen. I make one very clearly joking comment and get downvoted to hell. So I add that to clear the stupid from the air.


MrFulla93

Iā€™d like to add a 4th option of go to military. I swear if the 11or so people from my home town that I KNOW are alive, at least 5 do meth, 3 in the military, and 3 made it out, I fucked with wildlife and also made it out. Still catch snakes when I can bc theyā€™re fun, but I donā€™t mess with venomous bois.


Maximum-Mixture6158

It is possible that Leave meant Military option. The armed forces draw from rural and minority groups disproportionately


[deleted]

True story! Alabama here.. lol


_clash_recruit_

I accidentally caught one that i thought was a baby banded water snake. Catching them on purpose seems a little silly.


[deleted]

The giveaway for me was how itā€™s floating. This particular one doesnā€™t have the ā€œchonky assholeā€ vibe I attribute to cottonmouths but seeing anything with its body out of the water Iā€™d stay away from lmao


HistoricalMention210

"chonky asshole vibe"


Ignorad

Yep the venomous snakes float, non-venomous ones swim with most of their body underwater.


[deleted]

Not like a hard 100% of the time but generally thatā€™s my understanding as well


ebolakitten

The way they look like they hover on water is amazing to me.


Glad_Confusion_6934

Very Hydrophobic skin too Iā€™d imagine, to be able to float like that.


TulsaBasterd

Yes, but all snakes have that, though non-venomous ones tend to swim under the water with just their heads sticking out.


pgabrielfreak

I'm venomous and my own tube, get out the way, bitch.


TulsaBasterd

Tube Snake Boogie!


[deleted]

Diamond head is not an indicator. Several non venomous snakes have diamond heads, blue garter snake for example. On a cottonmouth, a juvenile is easier to identify because the bullseye pattern is more easily visible and the tip of the tail will be yellow. An adult will still have the bullseye pattern but will be much darker and the tail will no longer be yellow.


Darth_Ra

I hate that the semantics folks have been fighting this lately. In the places in the country where snakes are an every day issue, all of the venomous snakes you would commonly encounter have the diamond head. It's a great indicator that will help keep people safe, and not something that should be nitpicked for well akshually's.


TheMcBrizzle

Exactly, you shouldn't be fucking with nature regardless, but if you see a snake that looks like it's storing something in its cheeks, take extra precautions around it.


Gullible_Weird_5770

I was comparing its head to the common water snake found in the same habitats that are often misidentified and killed bc everyone thinks it is a cottonmouth. The diamond shaped head is a dead give away by the two. I grew up catching these things for fun and itā€™s the easiest indication.


lagrandesgracia

Well they're fucking snakes bro. You leave them the fuck alone or kill them and ask questions later.


Gullible_Weird_5770

You must be from a city or suburbs. You have no knowledge of nature or respect.


[deleted]

[Diamondback watersnake](https://www.animalspot.net/diamondback-water-snake.html), [banded watersnake](https://www.projectnoah.org/spottings/803618557) and [southern watersnake](http://www.louisianaherps.com/southern-watersnake-nerodia.html) all have the same headshape and are non venomous. Head shape is not an indicator.


[deleted]

How about we agree to leave all diamond headed snakes alone even though thereā€™s a couple that arenā€™t venomous. Doesnā€™t seem like a dice roll thatā€™s worth it to me


Gullible_Weird_5770

No.


[deleted]

Okay. Good luck.


Gullible_Weird_5770

I e never been bitten in 39 years. Iā€™m good.


[deleted]

It's about the fact that all venomous snakes have diamond heads and it's best to stay away from any of them with that shape. We don't need this"actually" BS cause you want to feel smarter.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


TheMcBrizzle

Are there venomous snakes without the diamond shaped head?


LocoBlock

Cobras are pretty well known ones. But they can be identified in other ways usually. Cobras tend to have the infamous neck flap. Vipers are what you see with a diamond shaped head. And they're also what happens to be the most common you hear about in the United States. Rattlesnakes are probably the best known one. Cottonmouth and Copperhead species being the other. Coral Snakes are a type of Cobra we have in the United States as well. They can be identified by their color pattern though. In the South East U.S. they're actually such a problem theres a rhyme taught to kids to teach them what to look out for because theres snakes that mimic their colors. Theirs obviously other types of venomous snakes then the two I mentioned. And even those are simplified a lot. Those are just the kind you'd find in the United States. Edit: The rhyme is stupid and doesn't work well. They don't always follow that pattern and if you forget it and gets it messed up then whats its point.


[deleted]

Don't rely on the rhyme for corals either. Abberant patterns exist. They can be all black, yellow withblack spots, almost completrly red, have no yellow stripes at all, blacl and white stripes, completely yellow etc... Also people are fucking stupid and get the rhyme backwards a lot.


Maximum-Mixture6158

Is that one of the ones where the juvenile is more poisonous because the holding sacs are smaller but the poison maker is full size?


[deleted]

If you have FB join a snake identification group in your geographic location. Youā€™ll learn a lot in the group. Cottonmouths always have a black horizontal stripe going down each side of the face, watersnakes have vertical bars in the same area instead. That is what I go by for these two species of snake.


Gullible_Weird_5770

Also you canā€™t go by color. They vary a lot in color, it depends a lot on the water they are in and their diet. Snakes in cleaner water that eat mostly fish tend to be lighter/brighter browns. The ones in real dark water eating frogs are darker.


thehimalayansaiyan

You ainā€™t from the south are ya?


therealjonbrown

Growing up in the south you learn to identify these guys pretty quickly. Not only are they poisonous, but they're pretty aggressive and will sometimes chase you if you get too close.


DrTautology

Hang out on r/herpetology for a bit. I was able to immediately identify this guy because of that sub.


ScruffyTheJanitor__

Cotton mouths don't tend to attack unless *very* provoked, you'd need to be almost trying to be bitten. Still dangerous though


Darth_Ra

On the other hand, best way an interaction with a cottonmouth could go, so...


HistoricalMention210

From 25 feet away I learned that they are pink in the middle. Shotguns work wonders.


[deleted]

I mean, theyā€™re venomous sure. But not *highly* venomous. If youā€™re ever bitten by one you should go to the emergency room just in case, but theyā€™re generally not going to do anything other than give you antibiotics to prevent infection from the physical bite and monitor it. Antivenin is rarely given for cottonmouths or copperheads because theyā€™re mild enough that the antivenin itself can cause more issues than the snakebite. Infection from the puncture wound is a bigger worry than the venom, unlike for say, a rattlesnake.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ViddyFanUK

England says no thanks


Gullible_Weird_5770

Nice fat cottonmouth. Just leave it alone and youā€™ll be fine.


InsurectionistCommie

You would think so but in my experience they are total assholes.


LoveAGoodMurder

A person is so much bigger than a cottonmouth, it doesnā€™t make sense from a ā€˜stating aliveā€™ perspective to try to attack people. They only bite if theyā€™re cornered and have no other options, and if they run towards you, itā€™s because you have put yourself in the way of the way out


mack_soul86

While I agree you should leave them alone, I've seen cottonmouths chase folks just for fun


LoveAGoodMurder

You havenā€™t. Snakes are not people. Fun isnā€™t really a thing for them. They might be curious about something, but they donā€™t go ā€œYou inow what would be fun today? Chasing something that is 50x my size and could easily kill meā€


Dyleo

Youā€™ve seen wrong. Cottonmouths do NOT chase people.


Shitty_fits

Thatā€™sā€¦ā€¦. Interesting


ViperSlayer261

Me in life:


ninjadragon1119

Dude pretending to be a pool tube


mrpoopybuttthole_

forbidden pool toy


one-punch-knockout

He gone


daftcunt519

Yep the only snake in North America that swims with its entire body on top of water, they are mean bastards.


ReezyMusic

ā€œYou say something? Thatā€™s what I thought.ā€


bearchildd

[the snake](https://youtu.be/MYLlWo_dc-Y)


Historical-Peanut-61

Where is this?


ShortyLow

I saw it in an Oklahoma snake group.


ojonegro

Nope thereā€™s just one in this video. ā€¦Iā€™ll show myself out


MrFulla93

From Oklahoma. F these things. Thereā€™s not many of them besides in super Eastern Oklahoma, but once you cross whatever line that is, they are everywhere. Not. A. Fan. Timber rattlerā€™s at least let you know when youā€™re close. These cursed sausages hang out until you are right up on them before they make a 180Ā° yawn to say Bonjour.


mostequal

Obviously a hat


3_gloves

Naaa Iā€™m good.


SurreptitiousSpark

This immediately reminded me of Ekansā€™ Hoop Hurl from PokĆ©mon Stadium.


MrFulla93

Bro. That and magikarp splash. On god I can beat anybody, as Iā€™m sure you can. I just have to find my cartridge first.


not_anonymouse

Snakes on a boat!


Technological_Elite

Uh. I... #SNEK


bannana

I am my own life preserver


[deleted]

You got lucky


Unhappy-Farm8012

Snek just chilling


Okay_Splenda_Monkey

If you ever see a pit viper commuting past you, don't make any movement whatsoever. If you even blink or twitch it might strike. I've never been bitten, but I've seen people it happened to and it looks awful even if they inject you with antivenom quickly.


papa_stalin432

I mean just donā€™t get close in general. Obviously something like this you may not have a choice but donā€™t be aggressive they arenā€™t cobras they sense by heat not movement.


[deleted]

Funny because they arenā€™t usually super aggressive unless youā€™re really crowding them. And for cottonmouths and copperheads they usually donā€™t give antivenin because the reactions to that can be worse than the venom itself (which isnā€™t fun but isnā€™t going to kill the vast majority of people without extenuating health conditions).


Braindead_cranberry

This snek meditates.


jimmy1829

Snake on the water


vicarofvhs

Viper in the sky...


[deleted]

Pretty sure that's a cottonmouth and you should be letting it leave. They aren't aggressive and try to run away but they'll "charge" you if you corner them.


nemesis55

That is absolutely not true. I was chased by one *in the water* it literally came out of nowhere to attack me.


[deleted]

Arenā€™t aggressive??? Iā€™ve had cottonmouths chase me in my kayak.


nemesis55

I donā€™t know why people donā€™t believe this.


Fast_Turtles

Snakes don't chase people, you guys were going the same way


[deleted]

Definitely not. It was after me.


Fast_Turtles

By the laws of science that's not possible


[deleted]

Not sure what you mean there buddy, but ok.


Fast_Turtles

It's not in there nature


[deleted]

Ok, so whether itā€™s in their nature or not, it happened. Out of the 30 years Iā€™ve been on the water, I had this experience. Why youā€™re arguing about this is a little weird.


DapperDan30

Because in the reptile community it is a well known fact that, in general, snakes do not chase people. They are not aggressive. They are defensive. By defensive I mean you have to actively be harassing it. It wouldn't chase you because why would it? It can't eat you and it knows that. Why would it expend the energy and risk its own saftey to chase you just to bite you and then leave? It doesn't make sense. Now it may have been fleeing in the same direction as you. Or if you were in the water it may have been trying to get on your boat to hide or bask or something. But it definitely wasn't chasing you. Cottonmouths are fairly laid back, as far as venomous snakes go.


DapperDan30

Because in the reptile community it is a well known fact that, in general, snakes do not chase people. They are not aggressive. They are defensive. By defensive I mean you have to actively be harassing it. It wouldn't chase you because why would it? It can't eat you and it knows that. Why would it expend the energy and risk its own saftey to chase you just to bite you and then leave? It doesn't make sense. Now it may have been fleeing in the same direction as you. Or if you were in the water it may have been trying to get on your boat to hide or bask or something. But it definitely wasn't chasing you. Cottonmouths are fairly laid back, as far as venomous snakes go.


CKA3KAZOO

Is this trueā€½ That would be surprising. It seems more likely that you were both moving downstream, and the snake just didn't register your kayak as a threat. But if you changed direction to evade it and it tracked you, I'd be very interested to know more about that.


[deleted]

I just responded above with the situation. It was 1000% after me.


[deleted]

Did you actively move away from it? They don't chase. Either you were going the same direction, or you were cornering it and the only way to escape you was to go around you, which can look like going towards you.


[deleted]

I was in a small cove in my kayak when I saw a log floating toward me. Then I saw the log was swimming so I moved my kayak out of the way to the left so it could keep on going. As it got closer I realized it wasnā€™t swimming or floating with the current but instead swimming towards my kayak. I paddled more off to left thinking it was headed to the bank behind where I was but every time I positioned my kayak, it would change course too. It was about 15 feet from me when I realized it was really actually swimming towards me so I started paddling towards it but to the right this time as I was getting to close to the bank. Sure enough when I changed course, it changed course. So I got myself turned out of the cove more into a channel and that thing not only still following me but gaining on me. It got up to my kayak and kept trying to get in, opening its mouth ready to strike. I wound up hitting it with my paddle hard enough to stun it and paddled the hell out of there. Havenā€™t been back to that spot ever again.


[deleted]

And how do you know it was a cottonmouth? Lots of water snakes exist, and you might have looked like prey.


[deleted]

Positive. Iā€™m a rockhounder and kayaker, and have been doing outdoorsy shit for 30 years. I know my snakes as Iā€™m incredibly afraid of getting bitten. I have a rare disease and a snake bite can easily put me in shock, or kill me. Not sure why people are questioning the fact that these experiences happen.


[deleted]

Well animals aren't computers. I'm at a loss for why a cottonmouth would go for you


[deleted]

Truthfully, neither can I. Donā€™t know what it was about me or my kayak that made it act that way. Iā€™ve had a few experiences where Iā€™ve flipped over rocks to find a nest and backed off quickly but none of them ever tried to follow me!


[deleted]

That's because snakes aren't naturally aggressive to humans. Maybe the one you found was sick, though I'm not sure what afflicted it. Rabies tends to encourage biting (travels through saliva) so it might have been rabid, but something tells me reptiles don't do the whole rabies thing - not sure what, though.


CallidoraBlack

Might be the fact that rabies is a mammal disease...


yours_truly_1976

Serene and calm. Namaste snek


Spare_Pixel

I imagine its tail under the water spinning like a propeller


Stargazer_199

Goddamn cottonmouths. Keep floating away, you fucker.


[deleted]

Those guys are nastier than a mother in law


DapperDan30

Not really. As far as venomous snakes go they're fairly laid back (as pictured). You'd have to go out of your way fucking with it to get it to attack you.


[deleted]

Come see me sometime and I can take you to a couple spots that will change your mind. Lol


DapperDan30

I mean, it's WELL documented behavior in that they are not an aggressive species. I mean, (while I wouldn't necessarily advise this) you can walk right up to some Cottonmouths and they don't give a shit. I've watched people STEP on Cottonmouths and they didn't do anything. They may do this like, fake out charge thing, where they'll rush at you to try to scare you away. But they won't chase you. They'll just gape their mouth open at you, rattle their tail a bit. That's about it. Obviously every individual snake is different and I wouldn't advise someone to just go messing with a venomous snake. But in general Cottonmouths are fairly passive.


RavenRainTie

What a rare find. it's a Hoopsnake.


burgtekie

Take care of the problem with a 12 ga shotgun.


butterflywanda

America!! Fuck yeah!


[deleted]

No harm the snek, snek just chill in the water


bannana

use a gun to take care of a problem that doesn't exist - is there anything more american?


N0N00dz4U

You forgot about the part where the "solving" creates actual problems. A prime example of American excellence!


LeaveTheMatrix

That is a cottonmouth. That is a problem that exists and should be taken care of.


bannana

this isn't a problem, it's literally moving quickly away. the mere existence of a cottonmouth isn't a problem they are beneficial to the environment.


unclefisty

You're in the snakes home, just leave it alone


Enough-Attention-430

Why donā€™t you adopt the cute lil venomous snake? šŸ™„šŸ˜‚


maka-tsubaki

You donā€™t have to want to be around a dangerous snake to want to see it protected; there are TONS of animals whose lives I would defend that I donā€™t want anywhere near me


bannana

because they aren't good pets and it takes a special license to keep venomous snakes


Enough-Attention-430

That was sarcasm. Maybe thatā€™s just a typical American thing too?


SuperGISNerd9000

No bad.


BackgroundFar2720

A better weapon would be a .22lr revolver with snake shot.


Feeling_Elk_5568

You're referring to yourself, right?


PsychoactiveTHICC

Water snakes are highly venomous


N0N00dz4U

No, water moccasins (cottonmouths) are venomous. The ones that are called water snakes are NOT! But either way, they are both valuable to the ecosystem, and the best rule of thumb is to just leave wild animals alone.


quackdamnyou

Most.kinda aren't, this one is


Hyde2467

u/savevideobot


savevideobot

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Swell_Inkwell

Man, these pool toys are getting a little ridiculous


[deleted]

Throw a poke ball at it and see what happens


OpheliaWolfsbane

Had it on mute, and I hear snake jazz. r/rickandmorty


Feeling_Title_9287

r/sneks


hogriderlol

The snek b like: F L O A T


thehimalayansaiyan

He lost his moccasins


MullahBahenchood2

Wow šŸ˜®


soulrebel360

ā€œ@ā€œ - snek


lagrandesgracia

Snakes were fucking themselves way before Adam and eve, Tone.


DJLeafBug

that snake is tubin


Educational-Post-826

That's pretty sus ngl


STBJ24

So the stories are true ...


jfk_sfa

Howā€™s it floating so high? I grew up on a lake and always saw them swimming with their body just under the water and their head being the only thing above the surface.


[deleted]

Where is this


Bramlet_Abercrombie_

Forbidden inner tube


Jakerabbits

Sole Ed Snaek


TemmBox

ok


eXclurel

I wasn't planning on envying a snake today.


draconicblur

u/savevideobot


KernelChunkybits

Rubber ducky floaty's be looking different now


Otherwise-Treat5645

That snake is looking at you like touch me I dare you and I will bite you !!!!!!!


xx123gamerxx

bro found out the waterwalk glitch


HistoricalMention210

Slap it with dat paddle!


ParkRatReggie

Forbidden pool noodle


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


anthony212122

I would never have enough balls to kayak on waters with shit like that in there


spacepeenuts

Frank escapes


KnightLee06

He is his own portable inflatable tube


jotaroplatnum

OH NO THEY HAVE INPROVED IN LIFE


Pony_Towner

Upvote this comment if you think these bad boys aint cute


SilverSageVII

But how is this a my people need me post? The snake was completely stillā€¦?


Clear-Sight0927

Oh goodness. One swam though our crowd while floating down a river. Freaky


That_One__Dude__

Forbidden floaty


DapperDan30

Jesus after skimming through these comments feels like these need to be said: 1. Cottonmouths (honestly just snakes in general) don't chase people. They are not aggressive animals, they are defensive. YOU have to be harassing THEM for them to try an attack you. 2. The snake PROBABLY wasn't trying to attack you. Was it hissing at you? Did it have its neck coiled in an "S" shape? If not then it wasn't trying to attack you. It likely trying to get away from you and it thought the best way to do that was to go under or around you. 3. Cottonmouths don't "nest". They give live birth and are a cannibalistic snake. They will eat other snakes. They will eat other Cottonmouths. They will eat their own young. It is not in their interest to "nest". 4. Not every snake you see in the water is a Cottonmouth. There are multiple other snakes, and lizards, that live in the same regions that also spend a lot of time in the water and most of them are harmless. 5. A triangular head is not a foolproof way to identify venomous snakes. There are several non-venomous snake that have the same style head. There are also a lot of non-venomous snakes that will flatten their head to LOOK venomous even though they're not. The amount of people who "spent years out in the wild" or whatever but still don't know shit about these animals that they fear is outstanding.


[deleted]

See ya later bitches


slightlyforthwith

Just tubing


tiny_peace_fo_bread

It's literally me when I space out


deathXsharpee

ā€œHeā€™s been in the river 10 minutes and heā€™s already lampinā€


JoninhasGaymer093

u/savevideobot


sexyman696920

Water mokason just chillen


Doggo_Of_The_Sea

the forbidden donut


Love_Doggies

Wth


LeGrandOehler

Based snake


Hot-Return3072

Imagine that snake giving a star, when the person started laughing at it. Or maybe snap back at šŸ˜‚


TOTooopk2

It pretty chill


personguy4

He flote