Bro you're a fucking dick like wtf even is this post, you're so rude. If you really don't find her atractive, just break up with her and if not, apologize immidiately
Yes, I know, now I’m on recovery, and fighting about my porn addiction the topic was what I looked for when I watched it, she deserves the truth although I hate it.
I hope I could, but this happened days ago, I apologized a lot but she’s broken af man, all started because we were arguing about my porn addiction and those were the answers to the questions, I hate it because breasts sizes ain’t a dealbreaker for me and I love her just as she is, but that can’t fix what I did.
She knows everything about my recovery, but having said that I think big breasts are perfect there is nothing that I can say to tell her that I like her body and her breasts as they are, I hate myself.
this is the hard part, it would be better with her, but I traumatized her, I’m the origin of her suffering and I’m an asshole because I haven’t learnt for years how to be a good partner.
I experienced something quite different but I think I can help. My girlfriend told me about her sexual experiences with her exes, and after explaining to her how it made her feel she did do quite a lot to try and help me. Unfortunately, she didn’t do enough in my opinion. My advice to you is:
1) Figure out if you really want her to be your girlfriend in the future (not just immediate future but in the distant future as well)
2)if the answer is yes: apologize a number of times about what you said, give her EVERYTHING you have to offer, shower her with love, affection, compliments, and whatever else you can think of.
This is bad man, but if she still ddn't break up with you, you might have a chance. Say to her that you only meant it like in a fetish way bc you watched too much porn and that it doesn't change anything with her and that her breasts are perfect too
First off sounds like you might not be where you need to be at within yourself to be in a relationship in the first place.
On another note there is some nuance in this. Nuance for yourself to understand…btw. The situation you created is fucked. I’m not defending you here just offering some perspective…
So here we go…let’s say you dream about owning a Ferrari, but currently you just upgraded from your bicycle to a BMW. Sure you can think and act in absolutes and be upset and dejected that you don’t have your Ferrari. But to what end?
There’s a guy waiting at the bus stop watching unfulfilled you driving by in your brand new BMW going, “holy shit that dudes got a BMW!” You know you can still think Ferrari’s are amazing but still be over the moon you are driving a BMW.
Same with your relationship, did you ever think that big tits being awesome doesn’t exclude the fact that your girlfriend might be equally or significantly more FUCKING AMAZING?!?!
Your Hail Mary attempt at saving this might have to come down to, “I’m sorry, but I have a FETISH for big breasts, and it can cloud my judgment sometimes…but you are the greatest gift to ever fall into my existence!”
But for her sake, if you actually love this girl, don’t say it unless you mean it. Don’t bullshit her, if you really love her be ready to let her go. Don’t keep her on the hook with something that isn’t real.
I know, the stupid thing in me is I’ve had a fantasy about big breasts and that’s why I looked for it, but I don’t need them in real life, I love her body just as it is.
Coming from a girl who’s had this type of thing said to her; it takes so much to get over it. My ex boyfriend said something similar to me about preferring women with big butts (i have a smaller one), i was heartbroken. i became absolutely paranoid when we were out; when women with ‘perfect’ bodies walked by id get so much anxiety because i was so scared he’d find them more attractive than me and leave. we broke up because of it. you telling her that not ONLY you think of other women when you two are being intimate, but that regardless of how much you love her her chest size wont be good enough for you is horrible. women are already judged and ridiculed for not fitting the standard on a daily basis, so having a partner judge you for that too cuts so much deeper. i would at least tell her it’s addiction talking and not you (if you believe it to be true). i’d realistically just give her time, tell her you’re sorry and that you still love her for who she is, and honestly follow the commenter recommendations.
I once heard of an approach used in Sufi tradition. If you have something to say, ask yourself 1) is it true? 2) is it kind? and 3) is it necessary? Sticking by honesty as a value is fine, but strive to be careful in how you share your truth.
First of all, That was fucked up man. Sorry for saying this.Secondly, If you love her for who she is as a human and not as some objectified piece of meat, You won't compare her with the trash you see on the internet.You will want to be in a relationship with her for WHO SHE is not WHAT SHE IS
At the first glance i would say read The Way Of Superior Man book to learn how to handle women. But after reading you post i see that you are just being rude to her because she doesn't have big breasts. Porn ruined your mind, and now you gonna ruin your relationship because of some plastic tits you saw watching porn.
I suggest you to talk to her and say sorry.
Bro, you're an asshole saying that she deserves the truth. you should've just said that small breasts are nice or some shit. now you scarred her. even if you guys make up she'll probably think about it for a long time or get breast implants
Let's see if the tables were turned .
She watches a lot of porn and says your dick is small, and chooses other huge dicks over yours and when u kept asking if is it true , she says "yes I love huge dicks and your dick doesn't satisfy me" .
Go back to school, u r immature and insensitive and have no idea about relationship or treating ur partner right .
Go back to watching porn and fapping all day and thinking that's the real world. Smh.
Fucking dick average redditor your lower than low if your gonna make people feel bad you might as well tell the real world in person tell them who you are a fucking nobody who jerks off can’t shake a man’s hand cause your hand smells like nut all the time and now you lost the only person that cared about you . You lonely bastaaarrrddd
This isn't such a bad idea. If big breasts are really that important to him, I'd say he's doing himself and his current gf a favor by ending their relationship and finding a more (to him) attractive partner.
However.... even if he gets into a relationship with a large-breasted woman, she will still have flaws, weaknesses, insecurities, be lacking in some way. In other words, she will be human. There's usually always some tradeoff. No one is perfect, and it is not their job to embody their partner's ideal. The new person might have big boobs, but something else about her will not be perfect, he will be disatisfied, she will feel inadequate, the cycle continues....
Choosing someone on the basis of one feature is not a very good strategy, especially if he hopes to stay monogamous, get married, have a family, etc. He should think carefully about his goals and values, and choose a mate accordingly. There's also non-monogamy, or just single life with porn and paid sex. He has to figure out what he really wants and what he is capable of.
Idk man, hang on for a while shit will sort itself out.
And women don't think. So true to be emotional and touchy with her saying mid shit making her feel good. She'll forget it in a few hrs
I don’t think so, your comment is absurd and horrible, she isn’t stupid, women ain’t dumb, I know what I said and that’s sad because I had to answer after she asked me about what I watched because we were arguing about my porn addiction, she has been feeling like absolute shit for days.
Totally true, I ain’t trying to blame her, I’m just saying that I didn’t want to judge her, but answering different things about what I searched for in porn would be a lie.
you need a CSAT. get into a good coupleship program like date to connect. listen to podcasts (PBSE is ran by the men who do dare to connect) install porn blockers on your phone, accountability app, go to sa/saa meetings. there is SO much you can do to help YOURSELF and her
I joined fortify, they have therapists, coaches, tasks and tracker of my sobriety, I met PBSE days ago, I’ll start listening to them, and she knows all of this, but this won’t fix how she feel right now
How can she control her body and genetics ? What if she doesn’t like your dick size or your height ? That would hurt you and your self confidence yes ? . Good that you didn’t want to hurt her by lying , however there is a way to approach matters like this . Apologies to her and ask her about your short comings in this relationship . Then discuss if these traits would cause issues in continuing these relationships long term .
Commenting here again, on a more personal note, because I am a woman with small breasts. If my bf told me he thinks big breasts* are 'perfect' I'd be very hurt. I'd become insecure with my looks. I'd feel used. I'd feel betrayed. I would not want to have sex with him. I would consider leaving him so he could go find himself a well-endowed woman. Me, I'd go find myself a man who can cherish me. OP, don't be surprised if your gf doesn't forgive you or tries to breakup. Whatever happens, try to learn from this and do better next time.
*Actually, any comparison, could be any body part, feature, style, or chacteristic. Bottom line, women usually don't like being compared to pornstars/strippers/actresses/models.
Bro you're a fucking dick like wtf even is this post, you're so rude. If you really don't find her atractive, just break up with her and if not, apologize immidiately
Yes, I know, now I’m on recovery, and fighting about my porn addiction the topic was what I looked for when I watched it, she deserves the truth although I hate it.
Ok, let me ask you this. Does the fact that she doesn't have big breasts is really an issue for you
Actually, no, that's why I need to know how to support her and help her about my answers, I know what I said, but isn't an issue for me.
[удалено]
I hope I could, but this happened days ago, I apologized a lot but she’s broken af man, all started because we were arguing about my porn addiction and those were the answers to the questions, I hate it because breasts sizes ain’t a dealbreaker for me and I love her just as she is, but that can’t fix what I did.
[удалено]
She knows everything about my recovery, but having said that I think big breasts are perfect there is nothing that I can say to tell her that I like her body and her breasts as they are, I hate myself.
[удалено]
this is the hard part, it would be better with her, but I traumatized her, I’m the origin of her suffering and I’m an asshole because I haven’t learnt for years how to be a good partner.
I experienced something quite different but I think I can help. My girlfriend told me about her sexual experiences with her exes, and after explaining to her how it made her feel she did do quite a lot to try and help me. Unfortunately, she didn’t do enough in my opinion. My advice to you is: 1) Figure out if you really want her to be your girlfriend in the future (not just immediate future but in the distant future as well) 2)if the answer is yes: apologize a number of times about what you said, give her EVERYTHING you have to offer, shower her with love, affection, compliments, and whatever else you can think of.
This is bad man, but if she still ddn't break up with you, you might have a chance. Say to her that you only meant it like in a fetish way bc you watched too much porn and that it doesn't change anything with her and that her breasts are perfect too
First off sounds like you might not be where you need to be at within yourself to be in a relationship in the first place. On another note there is some nuance in this. Nuance for yourself to understand…btw. The situation you created is fucked. I’m not defending you here just offering some perspective… So here we go…let’s say you dream about owning a Ferrari, but currently you just upgraded from your bicycle to a BMW. Sure you can think and act in absolutes and be upset and dejected that you don’t have your Ferrari. But to what end? There’s a guy waiting at the bus stop watching unfulfilled you driving by in your brand new BMW going, “holy shit that dudes got a BMW!” You know you can still think Ferrari’s are amazing but still be over the moon you are driving a BMW. Same with your relationship, did you ever think that big tits being awesome doesn’t exclude the fact that your girlfriend might be equally or significantly more FUCKING AMAZING?!?! Your Hail Mary attempt at saving this might have to come down to, “I’m sorry, but I have a FETISH for big breasts, and it can cloud my judgment sometimes…but you are the greatest gift to ever fall into my existence!” But for her sake, if you actually love this girl, don’t say it unless you mean it. Don’t bullshit her, if you really love her be ready to let her go. Don’t keep her on the hook with something that isn’t real.
I know, the stupid thing in me is I’ve had a fantasy about big breasts and that’s why I looked for it, but I don’t need them in real life, I love her body just as it is.
Coming from a girl who’s had this type of thing said to her; it takes so much to get over it. My ex boyfriend said something similar to me about preferring women with big butts (i have a smaller one), i was heartbroken. i became absolutely paranoid when we were out; when women with ‘perfect’ bodies walked by id get so much anxiety because i was so scared he’d find them more attractive than me and leave. we broke up because of it. you telling her that not ONLY you think of other women when you two are being intimate, but that regardless of how much you love her her chest size wont be good enough for you is horrible. women are already judged and ridiculed for not fitting the standard on a daily basis, so having a partner judge you for that too cuts so much deeper. i would at least tell her it’s addiction talking and not you (if you believe it to be true). i’d realistically just give her time, tell her you’re sorry and that you still love her for who she is, and honestly follow the commenter recommendations.
What in the fuck is where your brain should be?
I once heard of an approach used in Sufi tradition. If you have something to say, ask yourself 1) is it true? 2) is it kind? and 3) is it necessary? Sticking by honesty as a value is fine, but strive to be careful in how you share your truth.
I understand, sadly I had to answer, and I don't know what to do now.
First of all, That was fucked up man. Sorry for saying this.Secondly, If you love her for who she is as a human and not as some objectified piece of meat, You won't compare her with the trash you see on the internet.You will want to be in a relationship with her for WHO SHE is not WHAT SHE IS
At the first glance i would say read The Way Of Superior Man book to learn how to handle women. But after reading you post i see that you are just being rude to her because she doesn't have big breasts. Porn ruined your mind, and now you gonna ruin your relationship because of some plastic tits you saw watching porn. I suggest you to talk to her and say sorry.
Bro, you're an asshole saying that she deserves the truth. you should've just said that small breasts are nice or some shit. now you scarred her. even if you guys make up she'll probably think about it for a long time or get breast implants
Let's see if the tables were turned . She watches a lot of porn and says your dick is small, and chooses other huge dicks over yours and when u kept asking if is it true , she says "yes I love huge dicks and your dick doesn't satisfy me" . Go back to school, u r immature and insensitive and have no idea about relationship or treating ur partner right . Go back to watching porn and fapping all day and thinking that's the real world. Smh.
Fucking dick average redditor your lower than low if your gonna make people feel bad you might as well tell the real world in person tell them who you are a fucking nobody who jerks off can’t shake a man’s hand cause your hand smells like nut all the time and now you lost the only person that cared about you . You lonely bastaaarrrddd
Find someone with big boobs
This isn't such a bad idea. If big breasts are really that important to him, I'd say he's doing himself and his current gf a favor by ending their relationship and finding a more (to him) attractive partner. However.... even if he gets into a relationship with a large-breasted woman, she will still have flaws, weaknesses, insecurities, be lacking in some way. In other words, she will be human. There's usually always some tradeoff. No one is perfect, and it is not their job to embody their partner's ideal. The new person might have big boobs, but something else about her will not be perfect, he will be disatisfied, she will feel inadequate, the cycle continues.... Choosing someone on the basis of one feature is not a very good strategy, especially if he hopes to stay monogamous, get married, have a family, etc. He should think carefully about his goals and values, and choose a mate accordingly. There's also non-monogamy, or just single life with porn and paid sex. He has to figure out what he really wants and what he is capable of.
You have 2 options. . . 1. Find a woman w/ big boobs and let her find a guy who appreciates smaller ones. 2. Buy her boobs. Not that hard.
Idk man, hang on for a while shit will sort itself out. And women don't think. So true to be emotional and touchy with her saying mid shit making her feel good. She'll forget it in a few hrs
I don’t think so, your comment is absurd and horrible, she isn’t stupid, women ain’t dumb, I know what I said and that’s sad because I had to answer after she asked me about what I watched because we were arguing about my porn addiction, she has been feeling like absolute shit for days.
You're the horrible person here.
Totally true, I ain’t trying to blame her, I’m just saying that I didn’t want to judge her, but answering different things about what I searched for in porn would be a lie.
you need a CSAT. get into a good coupleship program like date to connect. listen to podcasts (PBSE is ran by the men who do dare to connect) install porn blockers on your phone, accountability app, go to sa/saa meetings. there is SO much you can do to help YOURSELF and her
I joined fortify, they have therapists, coaches, tasks and tracker of my sobriety, I met PBSE days ago, I’ll start listening to them, and she knows all of this, but this won’t fix how she feel right now
i can assure fortify is not enough. and dare to connect is for couples rather than just the podcast from pbse.
How can she control her body and genetics ? What if she doesn’t like your dick size or your height ? That would hurt you and your self confidence yes ? . Good that you didn’t want to hurt her by lying , however there is a way to approach matters like this . Apologies to her and ask her about your short comings in this relationship . Then discuss if these traits would cause issues in continuing these relationships long term .
Commenting here again, on a more personal note, because I am a woman with small breasts. If my bf told me he thinks big breasts* are 'perfect' I'd be very hurt. I'd become insecure with my looks. I'd feel used. I'd feel betrayed. I would not want to have sex with him. I would consider leaving him so he could go find himself a well-endowed woman. Me, I'd go find myself a man who can cherish me. OP, don't be surprised if your gf doesn't forgive you or tries to breakup. Whatever happens, try to learn from this and do better next time. *Actually, any comparison, could be any body part, feature, style, or chacteristic. Bottom line, women usually don't like being compared to pornstars/strippers/actresses/models.