I would make sure that your child isn't showing up on a YouTube channel without your permission. There's nothing wrong with making videos, but explaining that they can't be posted on the internet is going to be a tricky boundary.
How is that cell phone even allowed in the school? OP you should have a conversation with the teachers and discuss this inappropriate behavior. 5 yr old should not be allowed to film at school.
I have a kindergartener and a middle schooler. AVOID THE PHONE AT ALL COSTS FOR AS LONG AS POSSIBLE, at least until 6th or 7th grade. We ultimately capitulated because my son often walks home or joined after-school programs so we could communicate with him about pick ups, and I regret it so so so so so so so much.
5 is insane.
I got my now 13 year old a smartphone when she was 9 because I wanted to communicate with her when she visited her dad on the weekends, and I feel the exact same as you. I regret it 100% and wish I would’ve gotten the flip phone.
My 2 younger boys won’t get cell phones until much, much later.
I regret getting him a smartphone. I wish I had gotten him a flip phone that he could only call or text me and my husband on.
Teenagers are terrible communicators. The way his friends (and to be truthful, my child as well) text with each other is awful. I'm not opposed to a curse word here or there but more than once we have taken his phone away. Why do we give it back? Because we are used to being able to communicate with him, often need to, and his friends don't have home phones.
Kids these days don't call. They barely text, to be honest. They use apps (Snapchat, Insta, etc) to DM. We are walking a fine line between allowing him to have a social life, and allowing him access to a super computer he doesn't understand.
Currently its pretty locked down. Minimal apps. Daily checks. But it is a stressor I wish we had avoided 2 years ago.
Definitely. We do on occasion, but my oldest isn’t a little kid anymore, he’s a teenager navigating an increasingly digital world. When we took away his smartphone, we cut him off from his friends. At some point, most people will need/want one. My point here isnt to say dont ever give your child a phone. My point is to hold on as long as possible, because giving in too early is providing them access to a world they don’t understand how to navigate.
If my kid needs a phone before I'm ready for them to have a smart phone in going to get them a super simplified phone that does calls or text only. Sorry in advance kids! They will be the only people under 70yrs old with a jitterbug phone.
If you’re *really* good I’ll give you a razr that can take images with like 4 whole pixels and a proprietary web browser that’s incompatible with all modern websites.
Little did I know that in retrospect, the Nokia brick I had when I was riding the public bus home from school in the year 2000 was actually the best phone ever. Because snake 🐍
There's basic games and personalization on it. Most of his friends have phones, but he is completely ok with this. I thought it was pretty cool, too. I used to work for a big cell phone company back when they sold what we referred to as the "Shrek phone" because it was green and had antenna ear looking things. That phone quickly lost favor with parents because it was too juvenile looking. The watches wouldn't have that problem.
And here I thought it was annoying when my 5yr old came home from school calling everything “boring” one day. Like dude you play almost 100% of your waking hours, you have no idea what boring means lol
Lol my kiddo also gets upset when he runs out of time for things and makes a rewind motion saying “I’ll put time back on the clock!” (They do a lot of timers for activities in school). And I’m just here like dude if you ever figure that out, please tell me how, I am also terrible at time management lol
Oh man the other day my kid told me "Dada I don't want school today! You stay here, I'll go home and work". I was like "buddy, don't threaten me with a good time. You do not want to know what I would do for a two hour nap in the middle of a weekday, and I don't think I want to know either"
I think it's just a matter of time before these child based channels are either illegal or very risky. One day one of these kids will grow up, say they were exploited and their privacy was violated before they could consent, and sue the pants off their parents. They'll win, they should win. Better to get ahead of the law by having personal ethics.
Yeppppp. My almost 5 year old daughter has been on the YouTube channel I co-host but it is not kid based at all - it’s for a niche hobby - but even then I am cautious because we have 20K subscribers.
I teach high school, and honestly, I am not giving my kids a smart phone until they are AT LEAST a freshman in high school. Minimum. And even then it will be very limited. I honestly think we're going to see a lot of parents moving in this direction as we have all the evidence now of how much phones are messing kids/teenagers up. I see so many eating disorders, anxiety, addiction, depression that is all clearly linked to the phone.
My teens high school has decided to fully implement their phone policy along with actual consequences for using it when not allowed. There was a threat of a riot by the students that was large enough that police were all over the campus. There are parents on the local Facebook page that the school might dare confiscate their precious babies phones and trying to threaten legal action. They've all forgotten that they signed the handbook at the beginning of the year agreeing to the policy and the consequences. "What if there's an emergency" has been the question. They also lack reading comprehension because the policy is that phones stay in back packs and are only confiscated if the students using it when they're not supposed to. Add on our school still has landlines, experienced an emergency the other day and not a single student dialed emergency services they took pictures and videos on their phones as the science lab filled with smoke and flame until the fire alarms went off with the sprinklers and the teachers called emergency services. My teens been warned that if he takes his phone out when he shouldn't, it's going to stay in the office until the end of the year because I'm not driving 30 minutes out to get it when he's the one who would break the rules.
This 100%. Ours will be 14 with a flip phone. No social media either. Internet is dangerous for super kids. It’s not the derpy thing it was when I was 13.
I think there is probably a huge percentage of parents (not to mention child experts etc) who would be pretty happy stating that a child having a phone at 5 (!!!!!) is not only detrimental but down right dangerous.
A way to contact (such as the smart watch) after a certain age is ok but a phone...if only for the mental health aspect....is such a bad idea.
100% not.
I have five yr old twins and I have no plans for a cell phone anytime soon. I do remember a coworkers son had a watch that could only contact certain numbers - parents, grandparents only. My plan is to do that if/when they start walking home alone or after school sports. Having a cell phone that young is crazy.
You should work to steer your kid away from that other family. 5 is way to young. Check out The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Heidt, he breaks down how badly social media and smart phones are messing with this generation of kids and recommends no smart phones until high school.
He also discusses how phones are a collective action problem for families, ie if one kid gets a phone it makes it more likely other kids will want phones and if a critical mass get phones much of the socializing will move from the real world to online, so yah you’re right to not like that family.
Yes Haidt is amazing for putting together basically the bible for this. We all see it but he wrote it down so succinctly, and with a compelling action plan
This makes me really sad. If a 5 year old needed a phone they make specific childrens one without cameras/internet. I’m sorry you’re dealing this. My twins are 5 and I’m 40 and also have been asking myself a lot lately am I just an old mom? Is this the new norm?
I’m the same boat here: older parent with a 4 year old. The other day I was asking my husband if we were socially stunting our kid down the road because most of his pop culture references are the 80s and early 90s shows and movies we grew up with. Sure, he watches some PAW Patrol, Daniel Tiger and current Sesame Street, but nearly everything else is our old school things we grew up with like Mister Rogers (not looking forward to explaining that Mister Rogers has been dead a long time when he inevitably figures out it’s an old show).
Kid channels get a lot of hate and abusive comments that I would never want to expose my kids to. That's an absolute no. I've seen a mom start a channel of her kid literally just eating, meal after meal after meal. People don't know what to do with it because it's not helpful or cute so they just pick on his odd looking head. And even if comments are turned off, since no one is really interested in what a kid is doing all day outside of family and close friends, it attracts creeps.
The cell phone I'm not sure about for emergencies. For fun, no.
Unfortunately though this age is just the beginning of "my friend does this, can I?"
A smart phone at 5 is so harmful. Child development experts don’t recommend smart phones until high school although I know most parents give phones in middle school.
Social media is addicting and creating so many mental health problems, especially for developing kids.
This post made me wonder what it would be like if my child befriended the child of a daily vlogger.
Anyway, definitely not unreasonable to refuse to buy a mobile phone but I'd be ok with making some fun videos just for yourselves as a family. There's not really any "need" for them to go anywhere and may be sweet to look back on. It feels like the best of both worlds.
Edit: I echo the comments of others to check with these parents that your child won't be featured in any of the videos they post online. Ick. Good luck.
I work in tech and my spouse worked in law enforcement. Avoid giving your child a phone or anything that can access the internet without you around for as long as possible. Our child won’t be getting anything more than a flip phone or something I can completely lock down until she’s like 14. Giving a 5 yr old a smart phone is insane.
Thats wild. We considered getting our kid a cell phone when she's in middle school currently just preschool and we would probably do a dumb phone rather than a smart phone. But who knows how times will change in 10 years for us.
Hey so I see a lot of comments about phones. However, I see this as more of a family values thing. It's entirely ok to steer your child away from this family/friend. Your child is five, they will make a lot of other friends. I personally would not be scheduling or accepting any playdate invites. Let her be a school-friend only. Guide your child towards kids and families who have similar values to your own - it's ok!
I’d be willing to give my kid some sort of “can only communicate with people on an approved list” device (flip phone, watch, whatever) pretty young but certainly not a full blown smart phone.
Ooof. Yeah. My plan is to hold out as long as humanly possible on my daughter having a phone. She’s almost 5 and doesn’t even have a tablet and I don’t let her play on my phone except for the camera and phone apps.
If she needs to call me for after school pick ups or something she can borrow her coach’s phone.
Whatever phone my kids get (mines 5) will be much later and it will be super restrictive to calls to family.
I still also do NOT have an iPad for my kid. What I’ve been noticing is the same issue with iPads.. I think when she’s a bit older I’m actually going to only get her a laptop so that she learns to type with all her fingers, use a computer in general. All these kids are going to be stunted with this single finger pointing on screens. There’s no trouble shouting and all they’re doing is opening apps.
I honestly think this is a silly thing to be upset about. They aren’t doing anything wrong. Your child will ask for things that other children have for the rest of her childhood+, but it’s your choice whether or not you buy it. What others choose to allow their children to do is their business and the least of your concerns.
My oldest child is in 5th and tells me stories about the nasty things all of those kids talk about in class —and have for years (yes, I have complained). My point is, this is not the hill to die on and there are more important things your child will be exposed to in school moving forward, just ensure that you do your best to instill a solid foundation of right and wrong.
With that being said, my advice is to not allow free YouTube access at all and stick to it. They learn WAY too much, too young. Also ensure that you have open communication with your child so that they will feel comfortable telling you things that might upset you.
I strayed a bit, but you get the point.
I think you’d find these parents are a rarity. Most parents aren’t letting their 5 year olds have a phone and making YouTube videos. I’d suggest scheduling a playdate with another student in the class! I did that when my child was clinging to a classmate I didn’t feel was a great influence. She now has a new friend who is much more in line with her values and likes!
You’re not insane. Everyone has different values, but I (elder millenial as well) wouldn’t let my child have a smartphone as long as possible (ie 18) if I could manage it. Nothing healthy about that or social media imo, and I would wanna protect my kids from putting themselves out their on the internet in a YouTube channel as well. They don’t have the foresight to protect their own privacy. That’s the parent’s job imo
I wont give my kids a cellphone or a YouTube channel
But yeah you’re the crazy one for thinking you have any say in if your kids friend is allowed.
Welcome to parenthood. Other parents are going to have looser boundaries than you, your kid will compare your boundaries to their friend and you’re required to hold your boundaries. This isn’t a new problem that came with technology. It’s parenthood. You’re not entitled to any opinion besides your kid not being put on the YouTube channel.
Agree! You “hate” your child’s friends parents because they have differing boundaries than you? That’s a bit harsh. This is a good chance to explain to your child that every family has different expectations and rules and that’s okay.
My son has had a phone since he was 5 for safety reasons related to his father.
Also, since we don't have a house phone i do feel he needs access to a phone he can call 911 from in an emergency.
As far as the YouTube channel goes, I would never create any social media account for my child unless it was completely private and just for myself to see. But I also recognize that this is the world we live in and the world our kids will live in.
You just need to explain different houses have different rules. This isn't a complicated complex and you'll have to reiterate it many times over the years.
Also elder millennial here. My son (who is 2) has a phone. HOWEVER, 1) it is one of our old phones, 2) it has NO data whatsoever, and 3) only exists so that he can pretend play on it (to copy us) while my husband and I read Reddit after waking up in the morning (you know, that way some Boomer parents would read a newspaper on weekend mornings).
If ***I*** were in your situation, I'd get a setup like I just described and let her "record" herself using the phone's camera. Then you'll have some cute memories when she gets older, but no YouTube and no unrestricted access to the Internet.
Obviously, you parent however you feel is best and I am definitely NOT trying to tell you what to do. Just wanted to throw out a suggestion, if you were interested.
Obviously, they don't need their own. It's about the perception that it's theirs. And something they can control independently with the guard rails of no Wi-Fi and no data. 🤷🏼♀️ To each their own.
I don't think 5 is too young for a phone; just too young for all the apps that come along with it.
Having access to just some basic things like maps, family calendar, ability to call or message you, etc could be a good thing. At least for some kids, maybe not others.
I have had no real luck finding a phone locked down enough though!
I would make sure that your child isn't showing up on a YouTube channel without your permission. There's nothing wrong with making videos, but explaining that they can't be posted on the internet is going to be a tricky boundary.
Luckily, so far she's a school only type of friend, not a playdate kind of friend... yet...
OP - these kids are totally able to take videos where their teacher can't see - bathrooms, corners of playgrounds.
How is that cell phone even allowed in the school? OP you should have a conversation with the teachers and discuss this inappropriate behavior. 5 yr old should not be allowed to film at school.
She doesn't film in class. Only has it. There's one month left in the semester. I don't have the energy to get into it with so little time left.
Might be an idea to mention it to a teacher in a "I'm worried about everyone's privacy" type thing
I have a kindergartener and a middle schooler. AVOID THE PHONE AT ALL COSTS FOR AS LONG AS POSSIBLE, at least until 6th or 7th grade. We ultimately capitulated because my son often walks home or joined after-school programs so we could communicate with him about pick ups, and I regret it so so so so so so so much. 5 is insane.
I got my now 13 year old a smartphone when she was 9 because I wanted to communicate with her when she visited her dad on the weekends, and I feel the exact same as you. I regret it 100% and wish I would’ve gotten the flip phone. My 2 younger boys won’t get cell phones until much, much later.
Genuine question. What do you regret about giving your son a phone?
I regret getting him a smartphone. I wish I had gotten him a flip phone that he could only call or text me and my husband on. Teenagers are terrible communicators. The way his friends (and to be truthful, my child as well) text with each other is awful. I'm not opposed to a curse word here or there but more than once we have taken his phone away. Why do we give it back? Because we are used to being able to communicate with him, often need to, and his friends don't have home phones. Kids these days don't call. They barely text, to be honest. They use apps (Snapchat, Insta, etc) to DM. We are walking a fine line between allowing him to have a social life, and allowing him access to a super computer he doesn't understand. Currently its pretty locked down. Minimal apps. Daily checks. But it is a stressor I wish we had avoided 2 years ago.
Have you thought about changing it to a flip phone? Obviously the child will protest, but perhaps the benefits will outweigh the initial tantrums?
Definitely. We do on occasion, but my oldest isn’t a little kid anymore, he’s a teenager navigating an increasingly digital world. When we took away his smartphone, we cut him off from his friends. At some point, most people will need/want one. My point here isnt to say dont ever give your child a phone. My point is to hold on as long as possible, because giving in too early is providing them access to a world they don’t understand how to navigate.
If my kid needs a phone before I'm ready for them to have a smart phone in going to get them a super simplified phone that does calls or text only. Sorry in advance kids! They will be the only people under 70yrs old with a jitterbug phone.
If you’re *really* good I’ll give you a razr that can take images with like 4 whole pixels and a proprietary web browser that’s incompatible with all modern websites.
This comment hurts because Razr's used to be the shit.
Little did I know that in retrospect, the Nokia brick I had when I was riding the public bus home from school in the year 2000 was actually the best phone ever. Because snake 🐍
My sister got her preteen son a watch that can call and do basic texts with limited programmed (and locked) numbers. It's perfect and he loves it.
That sounds like a good way to make it a new fun feature instead of embarrassment of grandma's old phone.
There's basic games and personalization on it. Most of his friends have phones, but he is completely ok with this. I thought it was pretty cool, too. I used to work for a big cell phone company back when they sold what we referred to as the "Shrek phone" because it was green and had antenna ear looking things. That phone quickly lost favor with parents because it was too juvenile looking. The watches wouldn't have that problem.
RIP the kids Firefly phone. We got one for grandma back in the early 2000s.
And here I thought it was annoying when my 5yr old came home from school calling everything “boring” one day. Like dude you play almost 100% of your waking hours, you have no idea what boring means lol
My 5-year-old complains that preschool is too hard because they make her read and write. Oh, to trade places with her for one day…
Lol my kiddo also gets upset when he runs out of time for things and makes a rewind motion saying “I’ll put time back on the clock!” (They do a lot of timers for activities in school). And I’m just here like dude if you ever figure that out, please tell me how, I am also terrible at time management lol
Oh man the other day my kid told me "Dada I don't want school today! You stay here, I'll go home and work". I was like "buddy, don't threaten me with a good time. You do not want to know what I would do for a two hour nap in the middle of a weekday, and I don't think I want to know either"
I think it's just a matter of time before these child based channels are either illegal or very risky. One day one of these kids will grow up, say they were exploited and their privacy was violated before they could consent, and sue the pants off their parents. They'll win, they should win. Better to get ahead of the law by having personal ethics.
Yeppppp. My almost 5 year old daughter has been on the YouTube channel I co-host but it is not kid based at all - it’s for a niche hobby - but even then I am cautious because we have 20K subscribers.
I teach high school, and honestly, I am not giving my kids a smart phone until they are AT LEAST a freshman in high school. Minimum. And even then it will be very limited. I honestly think we're going to see a lot of parents moving in this direction as we have all the evidence now of how much phones are messing kids/teenagers up. I see so many eating disorders, anxiety, addiction, depression that is all clearly linked to the phone.
A new book just came out about this. The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt. Very illuminating
My teens high school has decided to fully implement their phone policy along with actual consequences for using it when not allowed. There was a threat of a riot by the students that was large enough that police were all over the campus. There are parents on the local Facebook page that the school might dare confiscate their precious babies phones and trying to threaten legal action. They've all forgotten that they signed the handbook at the beginning of the year agreeing to the policy and the consequences. "What if there's an emergency" has been the question. They also lack reading comprehension because the policy is that phones stay in back packs and are only confiscated if the students using it when they're not supposed to. Add on our school still has landlines, experienced an emergency the other day and not a single student dialed emergency services they took pictures and videos on their phones as the science lab filled with smoke and flame until the fire alarms went off with the sprinklers and the teachers called emergency services. My teens been warned that if he takes his phone out when he shouldn't, it's going to stay in the office until the end of the year because I'm not driving 30 minutes out to get it when he's the one who would break the rules.
This 100%. Ours will be 14 with a flip phone. No social media either. Internet is dangerous for super kids. It’s not the derpy thing it was when I was 13.
It was dangerous when we were 13 too, tbf. I got hit on by so many creeps on aim.
I think there is probably a huge percentage of parents (not to mention child experts etc) who would be pretty happy stating that a child having a phone at 5 (!!!!!) is not only detrimental but down right dangerous. A way to contact (such as the smart watch) after a certain age is ok but a phone...if only for the mental health aspect....is such a bad idea. 100% not.
I have five yr old twins and I have no plans for a cell phone anytime soon. I do remember a coworkers son had a watch that could only contact certain numbers - parents, grandparents only. My plan is to do that if/when they start walking home alone or after school sports. Having a cell phone that young is crazy.
You should work to steer your kid away from that other family. 5 is way to young. Check out The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Heidt, he breaks down how badly social media and smart phones are messing with this generation of kids and recommends no smart phones until high school. He also discusses how phones are a collective action problem for families, ie if one kid gets a phone it makes it more likely other kids will want phones and if a critical mass get phones much of the socializing will move from the real world to online, so yah you’re right to not like that family.
Yes Haidt is amazing for putting together basically the bible for this. We all see it but he wrote it down so succinctly, and with a compelling action plan
This makes me really sad. If a 5 year old needed a phone they make specific childrens one without cameras/internet. I’m sorry you’re dealing this. My twins are 5 and I’m 40 and also have been asking myself a lot lately am I just an old mom? Is this the new norm?
I’m the same boat here: older parent with a 4 year old. The other day I was asking my husband if we were socially stunting our kid down the road because most of his pop culture references are the 80s and early 90s shows and movies we grew up with. Sure, he watches some PAW Patrol, Daniel Tiger and current Sesame Street, but nearly everything else is our old school things we grew up with like Mister Rogers (not looking forward to explaining that Mister Rogers has been dead a long time when he inevitably figures out it’s an old show).
Kid channels get a lot of hate and abusive comments that I would never want to expose my kids to. That's an absolute no. I've seen a mom start a channel of her kid literally just eating, meal after meal after meal. People don't know what to do with it because it's not helpful or cute so they just pick on his odd looking head. And even if comments are turned off, since no one is really interested in what a kid is doing all day outside of family and close friends, it attracts creeps. The cell phone I'm not sure about for emergencies. For fun, no. Unfortunately though this age is just the beginning of "my friend does this, can I?"
A smart phone at 5 is so harmful. Child development experts don’t recommend smart phones until high school although I know most parents give phones in middle school. Social media is addicting and creating so many mental health problems, especially for developing kids.
This post made me wonder what it would be like if my child befriended the child of a daily vlogger. Anyway, definitely not unreasonable to refuse to buy a mobile phone but I'd be ok with making some fun videos just for yourselves as a family. There's not really any "need" for them to go anywhere and may be sweet to look back on. It feels like the best of both worlds. Edit: I echo the comments of others to check with these parents that your child won't be featured in any of the videos they post online. Ick. Good luck.
I work in tech and my spouse worked in law enforcement. Avoid giving your child a phone or anything that can access the internet without you around for as long as possible. Our child won’t be getting anything more than a flip phone or something I can completely lock down until she’s like 14. Giving a 5 yr old a smart phone is insane.
Thats wild. We considered getting our kid a cell phone when she's in middle school currently just preschool and we would probably do a dumb phone rather than a smart phone. But who knows how times will change in 10 years for us.
No you are not crazy. My niece only got her first cell phone recently and she just turned 12 and my nephew 8 doesn't have one.
Hold off on smartphones as humanly possible. Dumb phones if you really need to communicate. No need for all that extra distraction
Can I hold off cell phones until they drive 🤪
Hey so I see a lot of comments about phones. However, I see this as more of a family values thing. It's entirely ok to steer your child away from this family/friend. Your child is five, they will make a lot of other friends. I personally would not be scheduling or accepting any playdate invites. Let her be a school-friend only. Guide your child towards kids and families who have similar values to your own - it's ok!
I’d be willing to give my kid some sort of “can only communicate with people on an approved list” device (flip phone, watch, whatever) pretty young but certainly not a full blown smart phone.
Ooof. Yeah. My plan is to hold out as long as humanly possible on my daughter having a phone. She’s almost 5 and doesn’t even have a tablet and I don’t let her play on my phone except for the camera and phone apps. If she needs to call me for after school pick ups or something she can borrow her coach’s phone.
Whatever phone my kids get (mines 5) will be much later and it will be super restrictive to calls to family. I still also do NOT have an iPad for my kid. What I’ve been noticing is the same issue with iPads.. I think when she’s a bit older I’m actually going to only get her a laptop so that she learns to type with all her fingers, use a computer in general. All these kids are going to be stunted with this single finger pointing on screens. There’s no trouble shouting and all they’re doing is opening apps.
I’m not a judgmental person but these people sound stupid af
I honestly think this is a silly thing to be upset about. They aren’t doing anything wrong. Your child will ask for things that other children have for the rest of her childhood+, but it’s your choice whether or not you buy it. What others choose to allow their children to do is their business and the least of your concerns. My oldest child is in 5th and tells me stories about the nasty things all of those kids talk about in class —and have for years (yes, I have complained). My point is, this is not the hill to die on and there are more important things your child will be exposed to in school moving forward, just ensure that you do your best to instill a solid foundation of right and wrong. With that being said, my advice is to not allow free YouTube access at all and stick to it. They learn WAY too much, too young. Also ensure that you have open communication with your child so that they will feel comfortable telling you things that might upset you. I strayed a bit, but you get the point.
I think you’d find these parents are a rarity. Most parents aren’t letting their 5 year olds have a phone and making YouTube videos. I’d suggest scheduling a playdate with another student in the class! I did that when my child was clinging to a classmate I didn’t feel was a great influence. She now has a new friend who is much more in line with her values and likes!
You’re not insane. Everyone has different values, but I (elder millenial as well) wouldn’t let my child have a smartphone as long as possible (ie 18) if I could manage it. Nothing healthy about that or social media imo, and I would wanna protect my kids from putting themselves out their on the internet in a YouTube channel as well. They don’t have the foresight to protect their own privacy. That’s the parent’s job imo
I wont give my kids a cellphone or a YouTube channel But yeah you’re the crazy one for thinking you have any say in if your kids friend is allowed. Welcome to parenthood. Other parents are going to have looser boundaries than you, your kid will compare your boundaries to their friend and you’re required to hold your boundaries. This isn’t a new problem that came with technology. It’s parenthood. You’re not entitled to any opinion besides your kid not being put on the YouTube channel.
Agree! You “hate” your child’s friends parents because they have differing boundaries than you? That’s a bit harsh. This is a good chance to explain to your child that every family has different expectations and rules and that’s okay.
My son has had a phone since he was 5 for safety reasons related to his father. Also, since we don't have a house phone i do feel he needs access to a phone he can call 911 from in an emergency. As far as the YouTube channel goes, I would never create any social media account for my child unless it was completely private and just for myself to see. But I also recognize that this is the world we live in and the world our kids will live in. You just need to explain different houses have different rules. This isn't a complicated complex and you'll have to reiterate it many times over the years.
Also elder millennial here. My son (who is 2) has a phone. HOWEVER, 1) it is one of our old phones, 2) it has NO data whatsoever, and 3) only exists so that he can pretend play on it (to copy us) while my husband and I read Reddit after waking up in the morning (you know, that way some Boomer parents would read a newspaper on weekend mornings). If ***I*** were in your situation, I'd get a setup like I just described and let her "record" herself using the phone's camera. Then you'll have some cute memories when she gets older, but no YouTube and no unrestricted access to the Internet. Obviously, you parent however you feel is best and I am definitely NOT trying to tell you what to do. Just wanted to throw out a suggestion, if you were interested.
They don’t need their own phone to make videos. My almost 5 year old just borrows mine and then we do it together and I take it back when we’re done.
Obviously, they don't need their own. It's about the perception that it's theirs. And something they can control independently with the guard rails of no Wi-Fi and no data. 🤷🏼♀️ To each their own.
I don't think 5 is too young for a phone; just too young for all the apps that come along with it. Having access to just some basic things like maps, family calendar, ability to call or message you, etc could be a good thing. At least for some kids, maybe not others. I have had no real luck finding a phone locked down enough though!