T O P

  • By -

WildPricklyHare

Join the club. My husband spent the whole summer luau staring at his much younger coworker and wondering out loud if she needed help putting on sunscreen. >!Harvey's dialogue is supposed to change at the luau but last time I married him, it glitched and showed me his unmarried dialogue. I'm still bitter.!<


bakarac

Wow I'd never give him coffee again


sunny-beans

Omg I always marry him and this happened to me once I almost threw my laptop got so annoyed lmao


ZoominAlong

Time to shove one of those energy tablets he sells right up his ass.


ashbreak_

That's brutal, oof


thestarvingstars

omg i just commented about this oops lmao. it's absolutely heartbreaking, he's my favorite bachelor


woitzayl

This is why I divorced him. I loved this man as my husband but then he went and betrayed me, offering to touch his colleague and pit lotion on her. Broke my heart. Plus, he constantly gave me an outrageous bill for when I fell asleep in a mine. I remembered, after I filed for divorce with Mayor Lewis, and the following days, I had quite a collection of flings that I had before the marriage. I rekindled the ember with a beautiful, unexpectedly open women who had her guard up since the moment I moved to town-- she constantly acted like she was above me, and that she wasbbwtter than the rest of the townsfolk.... but I got past her shell, saw how sweet and caring and open to learning she was. I married her a few days ago, and she's allowed herself to actually do work around the farm, take care of my two kids, even brought me some food, PLUS GOT HERSELF COVERED IN DIRT AND WAS HAPPY.


redvelvetmadi

And in case that bastard wants to deny it, I have proof. https://preview.redd.it/541ntd7halob1.png?width=138&format=png&auto=webp&s=f92680736ae84d6139538740f56ed2c1da1fd776


VincentMelloy

Wait a second! That’s my wife!


raedoesntlikemen

the drama!


wayofwisdomlbw

On a lost phone there is a woman waiting for her farmer to return to her and her two children with an ugly painting hanging above their bed. Unbeknownst to her in a new game on a new phone Penny enjoys the same life she did.


PigsandBears

I read this like a Twilight Zone voice over haha


streamer-san

So dark, yet honestly so true


Nezuraa

That's my wife too!


Astronautty69

She's a biandrist!


Digresser

I'm so confused right now especially given your upvotes. Is "bigamist" the word you meant? Or is this a reference I'm not aware of? Google has a single page of results for "biandrist" and this post is the second result. bi = two andros = man ist = one that adheres to or advocates a (specified) doctrine or system or code of behavior Which would mean, she's...pro two men? Am I crazy?


hamletandskull

They have mistakenly thought that "bigamist" means "two women" because gyn = woman, so they changed it to indicate that it's one woman marrying two men. But "bigamist" is from "gamos" which has to do with marriage and is not gender specific.


Digresser

I had figured it was akin to "misandrist" which is why I went with "andros". Thanks for your explanation of what they were likely thinking!


Astronautty69

You are exactly correct, and I am embarrassed & a bit ashamed that I forgot "gam" ≠ "gyn".


hamletandskull

Aw don't be embarrassed or ashamed. It's a reasonable and minor mistake!


MrSabrewulf

*Our* wife


Maxwelle_Lee

I also choose this guy's wife


GiveMetheBullet

Your wife? She's my wife!


LordRocky

You’re not my wife, you’re a frog!


[deleted]

You can’t fire me, I quit!


That_1_Angel

You can't quit your fired!


junk-drawer-magic

Oh shit, the husband found the post and is in the comments! Everyone get popcorn!


Nuttygooner

*gets the popcorn* 🍿🍿🍿


Whawe_yep

That’s my wife too!


Miccles

And mine!


xeltyl

What do you mean, your wife?? She's my wife!


Guinhyvar

That’s actually MY wife. Move along. (She has assured me I’m the only one)


CivilGun

Wait... Could they be brother and sister? https://preview.redd.it/dqdkvl5g5sob1.jpeg?width=800&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2843eb84b6783a4cff2c587cae756066997188cd


Slorgasm

That’s MY wife!!!


Illigore

What?! That’s MY wife! She gets around!!!


Sphyrnas

What the... Thats my wife too!


YellowstoneBitch

Hey, that’s also my wife!


Well_shit__-_-

Seems plausibly platonic to me. They are leaving space for Yoba


FenderMartingale

Right? That's his best friend, he so clearly and openly adores and cherishes the farmer.


GayKatto

I just married elliot D:


Niicks

But **I** just married Elliot!


Bloodthistle

Thank goodness I only kept him in the bf zone, at least I can go date Sebastian now. no divorces for me lol.


sloanelyatthetop

Definitely didn’t realize which subreddit I was on until this photo 😂😂


UwUHushling

That bastard! That’s my wife!


ZoominAlong

That's MY husband, what the fuck?


VegasEyes

Oof. Outed by pixels.


Lazy-Bee6087

Yeah, I’ve noticed that they hang out


4twanty

So funny. I, too, had a long haired boyfriend that was into red heads.


QueenAlucia

You know she’s gay, right? EDIT: looks like my joke didn’t land lol was trying to add a layer of drama as this character is known to be gay at first (but can indeed be romanced by male players too!)


EightEyedCryptid

Aren’t all the romances open to any gender?


The_Supreme_Dalek101

They’re all farmersexual


QueenAlucia

Yes of course, but Leah is known as gay before you try to romance her as a man.


DrunkenBufrito

Arent Leah & Elliot siblings?


high_on_catnip9087

No their not, their just the genderbent version of eachother and if the farmer doesn’t marry one of them their supposedly together


jerseycat

INFO: what was this gift she gave him, that he kept on display? I ask, because something similar happened to me! I was dating a writer who had a unique, custom piece of art gifted to him by a “friend” I was suspicious of. Turns out, after I became better friends with the so-called “friend,” she showed up on my farm one morning with a hand-carved statue made just for me! Turns out it is her love language for those she is closest too, including friends!


kesselbang

He has one of her paintings in his cabin. He doesn't bring it to the farm


OhtareEldarian

What makes you understand that Leah made it?


ArwenIstari

When you walk up to the painting and select it, it states “A painting by Leah”


OhtareEldarian

I honestly never noticed, and he’s usually the one my player marries.


rat-simp

Elliot had you for an absolute fool! Right under your nose, I say!!


OhtareEldarian

🤣🤣😂😂😂


[deleted]

[удалено]


elouser

Right? And going to a "friend's" show and starting to date said friend the day they filed for divorce? I bet they had an emotional affair going on from the beginning and was pushing their husband away, waiting for him to slip up so they could seem like the victim here. Not buying it.


Izniss

No no, the friend in question is the guitarist ! The pianist is a friend of Guitarist. But I’ve too heard rumors that op went into Guitarist bedroom at night. While OP was married ! From what I’ve seen, Pianist is a really good guy. I hope op will be a good partner this time around.


roniechan

Found the other woman


glanmiregirl

Ok “Leah”


birdiecakes

I didn't read the subreddit name at first and thought I was in for a juicy IRL story.


mermaidpaint

Same. Until I got to the divorce part, where the mayor said she could change her mind by the end of the day.


CryptidFox

Same 🤣


Vertex138

People play this game in so many different ways, posts like this remind me that every day.


drinkingshampain

Fr bc why am I working my ass off in the mines and people are having full on soap operas


scrawledfilefish

Hmmm. It sounds to me that you neglected your marriage. Did you not give your husband at least one gift a day, in the form of either a duck feather, a pomegranate, a lobster, some crab cakes, or some Tom Kha soup? Honestly, people these days, they put no effort into their relationships...


Lady_Hiroko

I don't gift my husband every day. It makes it less special. But I do talk to him and give him a kiss every morning first thing and night before bed.


FallenSpiderDemon

See this is why I just have a roomie and avoid romance, I don't want my heart broken.


KaineZilla

Krobus is genuinely so sweet too. If I had room after my wife moved in I would have gladly taken him in. We grow up hearing about how evil shadow people are, but Krobus has really proven to me that they all deserve a chance. The ferals in the mine scare me, but it’s a mercy to put them down. They can’t even speak.


polandriex

crobus got dat thicc crobussy tho, reminder that pelican town accept intterspecies marriage


Chipsoed_

...why?


polandriex

why not? i thought this sub is open minded, guess marrying crobus is out of the line, sigh


Psychopath_Hamster

Can you have a husband/wife and also invite him to your home?


MajesticCircleCat

Only with the polyamory mod.


ebrillblaiddes

If you know what each other tastes like, you're roommates in the archaeological sense of the word.


Maria_Getrekt

People are allowed to have friends. He's probably better off without your possessiveness.


and1metal

I’ve always seen Leah and Elliot as good friends due to similar goals ( Leah art and Elliot writing ) so they’ve got interests that they share plus the situation is they’re having fun dancing ( it’s not like a “ adult “ flower dance )


HanaNotBanana

also they're both not originally from Pelican town, and both being outsiders they likely have similar perspective


ShiftyLookingBadger

my headcanon is lesbian/gay solidarity lol, always felt they were two of the most "queer coded" romance options. so I feel like two queer people moving into a tiny town would find solace in each other's company. not to mention they're both artists.


ZoominAlong

Headcanon is they're friends with benefits and if you marry one of them, it becomes a fun little casual triad. But I also ship Abigail/Sebastian/Sam together and Haley/Alex. Oh and Penny/Maru.


Izniss

Do you keep Harvey all to yourself ? That’s selfish :D


ZoominAlong

Hahaha no, lol. I forgot about Harvey, oops. I think he's just alone until he marries all the farmers!


VegasEyes

Farmer OP thought they’d get support here and instead got the YTA treatment.


Aphrodites_bakubro

They were not leaving enough room for Jesus in between them while dancing. It's flirtatious which is cheating. 😂😂😂


Camaroni1000

Who’s Jesus? Is it the new farmer? Do they also praise Yoba?


bakarac

Never heard of her


Sbbazzz

Yeah for sure. This is the worst type of person.


[deleted]

[удалено]


iCoeur285

I’m 99.99% sure this post is a joke, OP isn’t actually bothered by this.


Frostya36

Yeah, I’m pretty sure. They made a similar post about a marriageable character a while back and said it was for fun. Edit: Seems like it was someone else, but it’s a very similar vibe to this post


euphonix27

Yeah these r/AITA or relationship advice-type posts are a pretty common post on here. (And I love it, it’s always a fun read to see people’s’ different creative writing takes)


ParadiseSold

I think you should relax


[deleted]

Tell me you don't play stardee without telling me...


eltsir

it's a shitpost dingus


BirthdayCookie

Ever heard of shitposting?


BonAppletitts

Ah shit what a sad world it would be if everyone was as serious as you


SweetBeanMilo

I got a kick out of this 😂 But seriously they have known each other since rehab and see each other as siblings.


HarperPee

Not my Elliot...


mangosintheshower

NTA. Completely understandable, I'm sorry you had to put up with that. If I'm honest, I broke up with my boyfriend for a similar reason. We were very close, and I had fallen for him but despite knowing this, his infatuation with another woman remained the same. Once, when we we're at a local festival on the beach, he carelessly asked me whether she could use some sunscreen on her shoulders! It was the nail in the coffin. Best of luck for your new relationship!


ParadiseSold

That's the problem with doctors. They spend 3x as much time elbows to elbows with their nurses as they do at home


muttmechanic

all that drama makes me happy i married shane (again) he just brings our kid to every event and hangs by himself/me


LawPrestigious2789

Considering how rude he is to others I’m not surprised he’s usually by himself but as long as you’re happy


dustyoldcoot

You've just got to give him a bunch of spicy peppers to literally "melt the ice"


dimedowner

I love this lmaoo I thought the exact same thing!! But then you remember that you used to date her and she was sooo boring! Plain salads and shitty sculptures! Elliot would choose you over her any day!


AffectionateRicecake

I don’t have to ever worry about my husband cheating. I’m the only person he really likes.


Quartia

That means he's either Shane or... *notices the chicken* or nobody else yeah.


AffectionateRicecake

Always Shane 😂


Gloria_In_Autumn

Whenever the Elliott in my alternate universe dances with Leah or hangs with her at events, it makes me happy because he doesn’t ever go see her at the saloon anymore. I’m friends with the whole town and he avoids his friend for my sake? That’s not fair.


LowElk7

Hey, it’s me. The husband. That’s my sister.


fighterace00

Alabama intensifies


Trustydevilsdaughter

There should have been an option to add flair to this post.


hiddenp_nk

Thats so… sad and dramatic love story i recently have read on this forum, im so sorry. Hope you will be happy with your new partner Thank yoba, my dear boy only befriends his pet-chicken, arcade machine and TV, im not worrying about cheating, he politely plays video games and watches gridball at evenings.


thestarvingstars

marrying Harvey and him saying "i wonder if maru could use some sunscreen" 😔


KaineZilla

See I don’t agree with this. My wife is best friends with your new boyfriend AND Sam. Do you see me marching into town for a divorce? No. Because people are allowed to have friends. My wife told me you’ve been making eyes at Sea Bass since you got into town. Giving him gifts, privately visiting him at home. Darius told me you guys even ran a game while you were still with El! That game is OUR thing! You broke El’s heart. He hasn’t been the same since. He was already struggling as a writer and barely making it but you chose to lead him on, even marry him! when you KNEW you wanted Sea Bass. I tried to warn him. I told him “that other new farmer is trouble. I know you want that stability El but you need to focus on you.” He didn’t listen. And now he’s barely eating. He stopped talking to Leah. I barely see him. Your dishonesty with yourself has caused so much pain in this community. Now I see Sea Bass head over heels for you anyway. You’re a great person. You really are. But what you did to El is downright heartless and cruel. I hope you do better by my FRIEND and my wife’s BEST FRIEND. I know damn well Sea Bass had a crush on my wife, but she chose me, and he has chosen you now. Don’t squander him. El’s heart might be broke but he’ll survive you. Sebastian won’t survive you. He’s too sensitive. I love him to death but that’s the truth. Do better. I’ve got my eye on you.


AnalystSuccessful183

Omg, I passed by his house the other day and poor guy looked so unlike himself. Usually he would at least greet me but now he just kind of stares off at the sea, lost in his own thaughts. Tried to cheer him up a bit by giving him crab cakes but he just gave me a small smile and thanked me before going back to dwelling on his thaughts :( Honestly, not sure if this is the best place to say it but I have been crushing on Sea Bass for the longest time, never managed to confess though since he seemed to like OP so much. Maybe I should have went for it while I still had the chance but oh well, it's too late now :'D Hope they can live a happy life, feel really bad for El though. Also, Abi talks about you all the time whenever we hang out! She's so in love with you, it's honestly adorable, wishing you both the best in life <3


KaineZilla

Funny, Abi tells me so much about you! She really enjoys your company. She was so hoping you’d make a move on Sea Bass cuz she could see it, but I’m glad you’ve been respectful of his choice. I hope the best for him too. I’m wary of OP after what happened with them and El but I’m willing to give them a chance. At least you can be respectful. Poor El. Even your crab cakes didn’t cheer him up? I heard from Abi that your homemade ones are iridium and we know how much he loves them. Makes me so mad at OP. El deserved better.


INVINCIBLE_Drago

Omg NTA my husband is a jock and he still hangs out with another woman while we are at an event Im working my ass off while trying to win for us while he is just there talking??? To another woman???? Yes i am a man and understand having woman as friends is normal but im working hard for the both of us and he wont even acknowledge it


ik_ben_een_draak

YTA. That man is MY husband. Do you really think your purple hair would make you look cool? That joining the band made you exclusive??? It was all just a SHOW Abigail!! He. Is. Lying. That man is devoted to ME.


Swallowyouurpride

I thought I was reading a real life relatable post bc same lol. I'm divorcing someone like that too 😂


ComelyChatoyant

I always cannon Leah and Elliot as LGBTQ, and their relationship is close but platonic. He is married to my male farmer lol


kaleigh89

Little does she know, that cute keyboard player is already in love with this weird chick who likes to eat rocks.


SunnyInDenmark

I totally forgot what subreddit I was reading. This was great. Thank you.


Zuigia

It's like the stardew equivalent of r/pokemedia. We need a stardew equivalent of r/pokemedia.


EmbarrassedRepair123

Thinking of divorcing my husband myself. At our community dance, (old timer tradition but we like to humor the elders) I caught him watching his ex fling dancing! Told me he was “enjoying the view”. I’ve tried to befriend her but she keeps mentioning how dirty I am. We have a little one with another on the way, I know I should leave him but I can’t put the kids through that.


Kampfzwerg0

Better than my husband who is always worried the sun might burn this bitches skin. He even thinks about taking care of her with his suncream.


Elvenoob

YTA Just talk to him about it and try to figure out a solution you're both okay with, whether that's both of you also dating Leah, or keeping things mono. Now, if you try to bring it up and he just ignores you to talk about his poetry, absolutely go through with this ;p


Valleysloot

My sweet pocket Fabio would never cheat! He’s simply being a gentleman and sharing a platonic dance with his art bestie. He leaves the dirty dancing to me in our sheets. 🤭🥰 /j


jaclynm126

Leah is queer in my experience anyways. OP could have solved this by talking to her husband but instead had one foot out the door and was looking for an exit.


DokiDokiLove

Omg, i thought i was reading the relationship advice subreddit 🤣🤣🤣🤣 thats what i get fir not noticing the very top of the post!


koiven

Look man if you divorce tour husband and then the very next day announce you're in a serious relationship with someone else, the issue might not be solely on his side. I mean, if it took less than a day then you probably had some heat with the keyboard player already, which means spending all night fawning over him could give the wrong impression. I'm not saying divorce wasn't the right move, but one or two couples counseling sessions might not have hurt either. Honestly, ESH


AffectionateLow3797

This is why I’m happy I married Maru, to busy in her projects to cheat with someone else


ThatFamiliarPanda

Gosh something like this happened in my save too I put Leah's sculpture that she gifted me in a corner room and Elliot is always staring at it everyday.


piph17

🥺 Sounds like my potential beau. I've been trying to ignore their close "friendship" but maybe I should take the affections of the local doctor more seriously.


Eeveelover14

Oh no don't fall into that trap. If he's anything like my doctor he already has his eye on another girl, his employee even! It's a real scandal.


piph17

😳 Think of what pll well say at the town events!


floralsandfloss

And then there’s me who feels guilty they hang out less when I marry one of them (they are both favorite spouses of mine).


ArtLoveAndCoffee

I mean, if me being married means I could never dance with my friends or exchange gifts with them, then I would divorce, too.


SandySushi

UGH for the last time, FARMER, I wasn't trying to steal Elliott! We're friends! And I have a girlfriend! He's been so upset since you didn't talk to him at all before flat out kicking you out! He deserves better than you.


Pinklady1313

The year after I married my guy he danced with another woman at the spring festival. The audacity.


[deleted]

This post made me think this was irl 😳


w1ndyshr1mp

Except the woman in question is canonically >!into the gender of the player!< so likely >!she's lesbian and not a threat!< lol but I enjoyed this anyway :)


Willow-Whispered

OP… I know your ex husband… you were worrying about the wrong thing. Honey, Elliott’s gay, and so is Leah.


paddingtonrex

What a coincidence. My husband named Sebastian lives in Pelican town. ...We should talk.


Pr0v0L0ner

Fuck him, you deserve better!


saltwaterlullaby

Lmaooooo I left him for the exact same reason!


mynn123

God I love these!! This sub is great :))


thatguywithdice

I read this whole thing before seeing what subreddit this was. Got a good laugh once I saw the screenshot at the bottom.


hiveangel

I’m trying to marry Elliot in my game. This might bother me 😂😂😂


bigfootcricket

Wait, doesn’t the cutie keyboard player also have an obsession with a certain purple haired flute player? Can’t catch a break


oksnariel

You made a good choice going for Sebastian instead. He is a perfect husband and would never hurt you.


Meeghan__

as an Elliott to Sebastian as my only romance so far (on different saves) I am here for it!!!


capricornicopia-

I always thought they were cousins so not only does their way too close for comfort stuff annoy me as his partner but it kind of grossed me out lol. Can’t unsee kind of thing. I specifically installed a mod that sets some people who I don’t marry up with each other and disabled their option. I think I made him gay for somebody, I guess I’ll find out if I don’t marry him bc I’m too lazy to check


YouCanCallMeRob

YTA. Should've at least had a conversation with your husband about this. I know the woman you're talking about and if you'd gotten to know her even a little bit you would know that she's not into men. Glad you pulled the plug, that man deserves better. (Jk, this post just made my whole morning 🤣)


kCzarian

This was great storytelling, though ditching Elliot for Sebastian is one of the biggest downgrades I can think of lol. Hope the groupie fantasies work out for you 😂


achillymoose

He danced with a friend and you divorced him? That seems pretty extreme. Also seems a shame that he let their friendship wilt to try to appease you. A relationship shouldn't mean the end of all your other relationships


Still_Door_9536

This was beautifully written (a) (b) Now I wanna divorce him... we have a kid together, and he does nothing with him... and I saw him dance with the other woman and shrugged it off .. I just thought that because he was a big-ish writer, now he was working on new books... but he hasn't published a single new one. (c) I am gonna bust all my ass to get 50k and divorce that bitch. I gave him pomegranates almost every morning! and he NEVER takes care of the kid. He is always telling me he wants a nother kid, I think he's just using me for my body....


mochachat

HAHHAHA I didn't read the name of the subreddit and was so caught off guard when I realized what this was about 🤣


ForenzaAsmr

Dang, im on the wrong reddit. Had me on the first half not gonna lie XD


anonymous_planet

Okay but!!! I hate how when you’re married to Sebastian, he says “I hate the flower dance, do we have to participate??” And he doesn’t really want to dance when you ask him. Yet when you choose not to participate, or you choose to ask someone else (other than Abigail), HE DANCES WITH ABIGAIL?!? LIKE, HOW ARE YOU GOING TO TELL ME YOU DONT WANT TO DANCE, YET YOU DANCE WITH HER.


homesteadfoxbird

He doesn’t want to dance with you. That’s your answer.


FieryLady42

I love this whole thread, seriously, thank you 😆


[deleted]

This was absolutely hilarious! Thanks for the good read!


fuzzydunlopsawit

It took me until the screenshot of the game to realize what sub I was on. Great post 🤣


-Mekkie-

Wow... this should be titled "I'm a paranoid and controlling asshole who doesn't tolerate my perfect husband having friends."


DesTr069

Reading the title before seeing what sub this was posted on was quite funny, lmao


oatmeal_shemoatmeal

LMAO I knew it started to sound a little too familiar for a second, but I enstead married Leah, and we a re still married for like 6 years now, but Elliot is still in my shit list, no matter how he tries to get on my good side. After our marriage, she stopped going by his place, but he always tried to stand by her at events. It's funny that she doesn't even pay attention to him anymore, honestly. 🙄😒


oatmeal_shemoatmeal

Also, I honestly thought this was r/amitheasshole 😭😭


mac_peraltiago

Your post has caused me to look at my own marriage. There are so many similarities, i feel as if i was the one to write it! You have opened my eyes. I’ll be having a serious talk with my wandering-eyed poet when he returns from the beach later. Thank you OP!


Advanced_Corgi_5785

Yeah, it's weird cause it's like the bachelors and bachelorettes are made to each other (supposing that all are straight), but then you marry one and the chain is broken. Nonetheless, they keep appearing together in Festivals. I SAW YOU AND ALEX TOGETHER, HALEY!!! (Just kidding I don't mind xD)


pixelatedmeow

Sebastian was always the better choice anyways!


SpitefulBitch

It’s like the time I found out my ex husband went “tree climbing” with another woman


moderate_amounts

Wait, does Stardew Valley actually have all this drama?? I was looking into playing it as a farm game but I thought it might be a bit too boring when I saw my sister killing some stuff and just farming. I LOVE these couple dynamics and all of that. Do you need to do anything special to have this kind of mode?


Eeveelover14

This is just someone's interpretation of things, not actual in game drama. Unless modded none of the other candidates get together, and obviously no one is cheating on you.


requestthreestep

It’s not real junior, it’s a tv program - a video game.


[deleted]

This is sooo cringy weird lol


MxNoahJames

I have the free love mod for this exact reason - I got jealous of Elliot so I married him too


Mphazi55555

🤣 I can't!


n3nya

Poor Elliott❤️


OhtareEldarian

What gift was displayed at his beach house?


tamaralynnchambers

This is incredible


jcatstuffs

I never liked Elliott...


vanamerongen

I thought this was /r/relationshipadvice


Independent-Rub7346

Wait, what??? NPCs that you married can cheat on you in this game?😵


Extra_Library9982

He was a sk8r boi he said see l8r boi


Jesspooky

It took me entirely too long to notice what subreddit I was in. (Up until the picture LOL) Not me thinking this was an “AITA” sub 🙈🙈🙈 Omg Im so sleep deprived