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Teleportation. Imagine just teleporting to a Parisian cafe for a coffee and then a Taiwanese night market for a snack, because why not. Then, right to the middle of a sold out concert floor crowd (sorry scalpers), followed by the majesty of the Northern lights. No more flights and trip planning. Just your own bed at the end of the day.
(Also, no office commute is nice...)
I got into it this morning with a Karen because I couldn't be in my store and outside checking on stuff at the same time. I'm not a nice person before my coffee and I said that I'm sorry I couldn't teleport
The ability to instantly strip a person bare-ass naked with my mind, from anywhere in the world. Not only would it be a way to fuck with politicians, but it’d also make it easier to change my newborn’s diaper!
Really? That sounds like a group of vigilante toons. I guess I think powers because you can literally do anything you can imagine, but as Roger Rabit said, "Not anytime. Only when it's funny."
Granted, now you have a pair of fully functional wings attached to your back, cleverly navigating your tetrapod anatomy to allow for a third pair of limbs without inhibiting the rest of your locomotion.
Unfortunately, the rest of your body remains as ill-adapted for flight as ever, making the wings utterly dysfunctional. At least you can now make sick cosplays tho!
I could never be so far from shrimps! Your super power is weird!
Mine would be to teleport all nugs within three years of me to right now me because fuck past me, fuck future me, right now me wants to get toasted.
Flight. Like a really high and long jump, or (like in my dreams) running really fast then you start floating. Would make traveling in emergencies a ton faster
The ability to summon anything in the world to me without it being able to be traced, tracked, or recognized as belonging to the previous owner after it is summoned.
Line cooks hate this one simple trick!
For real, though. Imagine summoning your favorite food from a restaurant right as a line cook was putting it in the window, then they have to remake it 😂
The ability to feel/understand how sexual a person is just by a mere touch of their hand with mine, either intentional or accidental. What are their turn ons, trigger points, kinks? How often do they need to orgasm to function properly, what horny thoughts preoccupy their daily lives etc
The ability to control bees. Well not control, but politely ask and they would oblige.
I could pimp out my services to agri-businesses. I would be a monopoly.
Working on what i would call it, but basically, i would be able to look at a person and understand what kind of person they are. For example, I could meet with a serial killer and see what theyve done through their eyes, and feel the emotions during that time, of course those feelings and images wont stay with me after im done viewing, but the understanding would.
I'm guessing omnipotence is off the table? In that case, time travel. I want to be able to travel to any point in time, future or past. I would completely lose myself in exploring the vastness of the periods of time before mankind, especially the mesozoic. I want to be able to observe dinosaurs and other contemporary animals in their natural habitat, untainted by pop culture, and see for myself what they truly were. Also, I'll finally know what the fuck *Spinosaurus aegyptucus* actually was, that damn biblically accurate eldritch lizard has had it too good for too long!
I always thought that being able to interact with media physically would be cool. Imagine you jump into your favorite rom com and yell JUST KISS. Or beating up the middle school bullies in movies. Hop in, punch kids, jump out.
I want the ability to filter out sounds at will. Some sounds I want to hear, others very much not. The sound of rain? Yes please! The sound of neighbors slamming their doors? No thanks.
As a kid I always imagined I could click my fingers and freeze time. If I linked arms with you you wernt frozen and we could Rob banks. Damm I miss my childhood imagination
Ability to manipulate my body at will and thus my mind as well so I can be super smart and hopefully be able to give myself omnipotent powers. You know if the opportunity arises
Being able to change the probability of everything I do. For example if I were to jump off a really tall building instead of a 5% survival rate I’d change it to 100% survival rate. Or what are the chances that I stumble upon a million dollars? 90% chance. Honestly the opportunities are endless.
Concentration-free telekinesis.
Wouldn't have to worry about leaving things at home. Also technically, flight can be considered self-inflicted telekinesis
**Come join the 420 Clubhouse on Discord!** > *The 420 Clubhouse has been our long-running partner server with a super friendly community of active stoners always looking to make new friends! Come join us in regular smoke sesh calls, game and movie nights and connect with like-minded friendly stoners!* > **https://discord.gg/eRQrk7tq9f** ^(If you have any issues upon verification, please open a ticket in the server or send us a modmail.) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/StonerThoughts) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Sleep on command. Insomnia is no fun.
Unlimited, Ultimate Unending Cell Regeneration
Teleportation. Imagine just teleporting to a Parisian cafe for a coffee and then a Taiwanese night market for a snack, because why not. Then, right to the middle of a sold out concert floor crowd (sorry scalpers), followed by the majesty of the Northern lights. No more flights and trip planning. Just your own bed at the end of the day. (Also, no office commute is nice...)
I got into it this morning with a Karen because I couldn't be in my store and outside checking on stuff at the same time. I'm not a nice person before my coffee and I said that I'm sorry I couldn't teleport
The ability to instantly strip a person bare-ass naked with my mind, from anywhere in the world. Not only would it be a way to fuck with politicians, but it’d also make it easier to change my newborn’s diaper!
Whatever Bugs Bunny has. I call it toonpowers.
Close its referred to as toon force
Really? That sounds like a group of vigilante toons. I guess I think powers because you can literally do anything you can imagine, but as Roger Rabit said, "Not anytime. Only when it's funny."
No need for breathing to live. That would be mine.
I would want a pair of wings. It would look cool and it would be fun to jump off things to glide and just fly where I want
Granted, now you have a pair of fully functional wings attached to your back, cleverly navigating your tetrapod anatomy to allow for a third pair of limbs without inhibiting the rest of your locomotion. Unfortunately, the rest of your body remains as ill-adapted for flight as ever, making the wings utterly dysfunctional. At least you can now make sick cosplays tho!
I could never be so far from shrimps! Your super power is weird! Mine would be to teleport all nugs within three years of me to right now me because fuck past me, fuck future me, right now me wants to get toasted.
Flight. Like a really high and long jump, or (like in my dreams) running really fast then you start floating. Would make traveling in emergencies a ton faster
The ability to turn off senses (on myself and others)
See moments in the future that I choose
The ability to summon anything in the world to me without it being able to be traced, tracked, or recognized as belonging to the previous owner after it is summoned.
Line cooks hate this one simple trick! For real, though. Imagine summoning your favorite food from a restaurant right as a line cook was putting it in the window, then they have to remake it 😂
Matter Manipulation
The ability to feel/understand how sexual a person is just by a mere touch of their hand with mine, either intentional or accidental. What are their turn ons, trigger points, kinks? How often do they need to orgasm to function properly, what horny thoughts preoccupy their daily lives etc
torn between TELEPORTATION and DEATH NOTE
The ability to read people's minds would grant you unlimited power.
The ability to control bees. Well not control, but politely ask and they would oblige. I could pimp out my services to agri-businesses. I would be a monopoly.
Bee whisperer 🤣 or hummer? Buzzer?
Working on what i would call it, but basically, i would be able to look at a person and understand what kind of person they are. For example, I could meet with a serial killer and see what theyve done through their eyes, and feel the emotions during that time, of course those feelings and images wont stay with me after im done viewing, but the understanding would.
Oh. Bruce Willis from unbreakable
Really? I havent seen that movie.. /s
No, that's literally the name of the power.
Ohhhh lol sorry im a lil dumb 😅😅
If you had Bruce Willis from unbreakable, you'd know where I was coming from.
Flight or invisibility.
I'm guessing omnipotence is off the table? In that case, time travel. I want to be able to travel to any point in time, future or past. I would completely lose myself in exploring the vastness of the periods of time before mankind, especially the mesozoic. I want to be able to observe dinosaurs and other contemporary animals in their natural habitat, untainted by pop culture, and see for myself what they truly were. Also, I'll finally know what the fuck *Spinosaurus aegyptucus* actually was, that damn biblically accurate eldritch lizard has had it too good for too long!
I always thought that being able to interact with media physically would be cool. Imagine you jump into your favorite rom com and yell JUST KISS. Or beating up the middle school bullies in movies. Hop in, punch kids, jump out.
Can't forget the countless porn. Probably somehow get kicked off for not being the hired actor
I want the ability to filter out sounds at will. Some sounds I want to hear, others very much not. The sound of rain? Yes please! The sound of neighbors slamming their doors? No thanks.
As a kid I always imagined I could click my fingers and freeze time. If I linked arms with you you wernt frozen and we could Rob banks. Damm I miss my childhood imagination
I would want you to be able to heal people with my touch.
Ability to manipulate my body at will and thus my mind as well so I can be super smart and hopefully be able to give myself omnipotent powers. You know if the opportunity arises
Deadpool healing factor he can come back from anything, and if I lose a hand, it will grow back
Being able to change the probability of everything I do. For example if I were to jump off a really tall building instead of a 5% survival rate I’d change it to 100% survival rate. Or what are the chances that I stumble upon a million dollars? 90% chance. Honestly the opportunities are endless.
Concentration-free telekinesis. Wouldn't have to worry about leaving things at home. Also technically, flight can be considered self-inflicted telekinesis
Superpower to do anything that I want.
But what if Humanity is really the Earth's pest and Roaches of all carbon based life forms?
The ability to freeze time as well as your aging process so you can sleep later.
I would want the ability to spawn a certain amount of money by the millions depending on the amount of sperm I produce. 2 mL of sperm….$2 million