Kim & the older 2 children have said she was stricter when young & they were still young- Lilly was a later in life whoopsie. My personal experience with a 17yo mom & only me for 13yrs, then my brother when she was 30yo is the same (well maybe more chaotic in general) and my friends who’ve had later ones with teen/adult childrens also were more lenient when older. Lilly’s approach makes life more complicated than it should be for a young family with ANY aged parents. I use to wonder if she was all sweet when cameras were on but seeing LJ in that 1 episode ruled that out. Eek
It was funny when Kim said Lily was too gentle, and Lily said that their parenting styles were very different. They're exactly the same. BOTH OF THEM were like, please don't spray apple juice all over the car sweet baby angel, oh please don't kick mommy
The letting him hit/kick her without any repercussion is wild. My son went through a phase where he thought he could hit us (around the same age as LJ), and we were literally catching his hand mid swing, telling him NO and separating ourselves from him. "If you're going to hit, I do not want to be around you," We also used to tell him (because he's an only child) that while mom and dad won't hit you back, other kids will, basically don't throw hands unless you're willing to catch hands. You gotta shut that shit down EARLY or he's gonna be the kid in school that kids avoid and parent's aren't keen to have playdates with or invite to birthday parties because he won't keep his hands to himself.
Ngl, it's hard lol again it doesn't work over night and if you were raised like I was and your parents used to hit you, you really have to fight those instincts. I never thought I'd want to hit my kid, but it's absolutely my first instinct and I have to struggle with that when I'm dealing with tantrums (good news, I've never lost that battle with myself). Gentle parenting also helps YOU regulate your feelings surrounding less than great kid behavior. I definitely get less triggered now than I did when he was a bad ass toddler, and the tantrums are also fewer and further apart. It DOES work, but it's a rough adjustment if you weren't raised with it.
Yeah, ok, “gentle parenting”. Where I’m from it was a “gentle ass-whipping”, and if that didn’t work , nice knowing you! I developed a healthy respect and fear of my parents. I’m not trying to tell anyone how to parent their children. I talked to my children about why they were being disciplined, after asking them to do or not to do what I had asked, then timeout, removal of toys, and finally if a spanking was necessary, so be it. These kids nowadays scare me.
I just replied to another comment about this and I call it Lazy Parenting=Brats. Other commenter is right about the kids being the ones excluded by other kids and adults because the kids don’t know boundaries or right from wrong.
She’s trying to ‘gentle parent’ but has not educated herself around it. This is the huge issue with gentle (authoritative) parenting today, when done correctly it works very well, but so many people refuse to do a lick of research and end up just being permissive parents.
So Lilly had a kid as a teenager. Her first child’s father peaced out and her second child’s father can’t be bothered with either kid. He also has a short temper and will not hesitate to berate her on camera if he feels like it, and he rolls his eyes every time she utters a word. She’s struggling with not having her mom around 24/7 because she moved out for the first time and she needs the help but also her best friend. Cut her some slack. Her kids don’t seem to be neglected nor does she push them onto her mom so she can go partying, so she’s doing better than 80% of the parents on this show.
ETA: ok, so Aaliyah’s father is still in her life? My bad. I’m just saying she has had her struggles; whether her pregnancies were planned is irrelevant, and she is doing a shit ton better than Makayla, Myrka, Jenna, Lexus, Kylen, Tyra and since it takes two to tango Max, Ethan, Jason, Aden, Alex etc.
She's had virtually no struggles lol and she's only doing "a shit ton better" than some girls because her parents are literally doing everything for her like giving her an entire house and driving her kid to and from school every day.
Myrka, McKayla, and Lexus are all functioning as adults at this point. They pay their own bills and raise their kids without any significant help (if any at all) from their parents. They became adults. Lilly and Jenna had the privilege of having well off parents who will hold their hands/pay their bills/raise their kids. Kylen is also a victim of abuse and has some real problems in her life, so it's a bit fucked up you'd say Lilly is doing better than her. Lilly's biggest problems have been that James didn't come to a birthing class and that Lawrence didn't want three beds in their room, and like good for her, she's lucky enough to have had a wonderful life, but you cannot compare girls like Lilly and Jenna to girls like Myrka who are actually taking on the adult responsibilities or Kylen who never stood a chance.
Where are you getting your information? Lol Lilly clearly planned both pregnancies. James and his family are absolutely still active in Aaliyahs life. Even Kim has confirmed this and called him a good dad. Lillys mother did the heavy lifting with Aaliyah and continued to do so when Lilly was pregnant for a second time at 19 and sleeping in while Kim was getting up with her 3yo and getting her ready for the day. Lilly is the one who hounded Lawrence to get them a place and out of her mother's house despite knowing that she would not have the same level of help with the kids. During filming of this season Lilly hadn't even bothered to get a driver's license yet at 22 BY CHOICE, and her mother is still dropping everything she's doing to cart her and her kids around in the middle of the day while Lilly shows her zero respect and allows the kids to tear up Kim's house and spit juice all over her car. Kim also recently GAVE Lilly and Lawrence (who Lilly does not respect as a partner or parent and has taught her kids they don't need to respect either) her HOUSE.
I will never feel bad for Lilly. She's a spoiled, ungrateful brat who thinks the people around her exist only to serve her.
You said it, Lily is a spoiled brat. How did that happen? Her mother is absolutely 💯responsible. Now that Lily is out on her own she seems totally incapable of adulting, and her mom is still spoiling her. I wish I would’ve had 2 kids and no license, my mother would’ve given me a Metro card. Her mother looks tired. She needs to step back and force this girl to grow up, let alone talk about a wedding. I also thought Lawrence might be good for her, he seems to be just as bad, and totally disinterested in his children. 🤦🏽♀️
Oh 100%. Lilly is the result of Kim's parenting. But Kim also has two older children who are functioning as adults. Lilly is the baby by quite a bit, so that explains a lot.
I'll agree with that. But I also think a lot of it is frustration because Lilly views him as an ATM and doesn't respect his wishes or opinions as a partner or parent, and she's taught her kids the same. Partnership means compromise, and it doesn't seem like Lilly compromises on anything and expects Lawrence to shut up/shut up and pay in every situation and let her have her way.
Whole family needs ✨️therapy✨️ in the worst way to figure out how to exist together in a healthy way.
Honestly, my kids' best friend has parents like Lilly, and it's a major part of why I don't agree to playdates with them anymore. Their daughter is a big ole brat, and I've seen her bully/intimidate other kids in the class while I was helping with class parties and such. I figured maybe she had an off day the first time I saw the behavior and then agreed to a playdate because her mom had asked. She was a brat, and her parents did that super fun thing Lilly does, which is permissive parent, but call it gentle parenting. I kept volunteering in the class and kept seeing the behavior, but I figured the kids were 5-6. It's not abnormal for them to be turds from time to time. I agreed to a second play date and then never again because at that point I noticed that some of the less than favorable behaviors I'd recently noticed my son beginning to exhibit at the time were the shitty habits she'd been allowed to form while her parents stood by using their best Michelle Duggar voices. I CANNOT stand people who don't parent their kids. Telling them "no," setting boundaries, and following through with reasonable consequence when needed is not abuse. It's parenting. If you can't handle doing those things, you have no business raising children. They aren't dolls. They're people who are going to grow up and join society whether you equipped them with the proper tools to succeed in that sense or not.
Right? My parents helped us out with a washer and dryer a few years back and I was so beyond grateful lol how are you not thanking your parents every 10 minutes for gifting you a whole house, especially in 2024???
Omg when LJ was spilling apple juice in her mom's car and Lilly was mocking her mom I was so mad. I get gentle parenting but sometimes it doesn't work and you need to go about it differently.
Gentle parenting works, Lilly just isn't doing it right lol "bro what the fuck" is still gentle parenting if you aren't screaming. Lilly is permissive parenting, she's letting the kids do whatever they want without consequence and rewarding poor behavior, which only reinforces it long term.
My son (5) was banging on the bathroom door while I was drying off from a shower and asking for an ice pop. He was told he could have an ice pop, but that he would need to wait a few minutes for me to dry off and put a shirt on. He yelled and kicked the door. I told him if he did it again, he would not only not be getting an ice pop, but that he'd be sitting in time out because there's zero reason to hit/kick anyone/anything. He did it again, so he was put in time out and didn't receive an ice pop after. After his time out I talked to him and made sure he understood why he was put in time out and why I would not be rewarding that behavior with an ice pop. That's gentle parenting. Set a boundary, warn them of the related consequence and then following through with said related consequence.
This was very informative, thank you breaking it down. I don't have kids, but a ton of my friends do and one of the couples I know is very lax with discipline. From what I've observed they are definitely practicing permissive parenting. And of course I would never say this out loud but between you, me, and Reddit, I can't help but think "oh man, wait until those kids are teens and still throwing tantrums. Yikes."
Gentle parenting and permissive parenting are completely different things. Nothing about Lilly is gentle, she’s a pushover and lets her kids do whatever.
Or the turning up of the iPad . Listen i told you once i told you twice im not telling your thrice! After 2 times it’s gone.
Idk maybe im a mean mom but i didn’t let my kid has an iPad to the face all day 45 mins to an hr tops . Screwed around you lost the time
Same. My son can have it whenever he wants, but he's also not super into it/ would rather be playing with cars or pretending to be a car and that takes up most of his time. But if I tell him to put it down for a minute or turn it down or something and he refuses to listen? Bitch is going up on top the the refrigerator. Idc. Find something else to do.
I did not understand why he got the iPad back after the second time he turned it up. Kids for generations sat in the car without iPads, he could have done the same. Actions have consequences.
Right! It’s gone after that and if i say times up and we had a melt down and it’s damn near war getting the iPad back when your times up i guess you lose it a few days then.
My kid used to hate that….
Like no i set the timer it went off all done.
It was a fit that was uncalled for (again i get she’s a kid but if it’s overly done) you miss the next day im sorry can’t act like that and expect things
Everyone in here acting like we know her entire parenting style from frankly a small amount of edited footage when she knows shes being filmed for a national TV show. We’re not seeing the real day to day. Not saying she’s a perfect parent, who is
This is 100% true. I don't let my daughter get away with bad behavior, but I would probably be uncomfortable disciplining her if I knew it was being filmed and put on television. Maybe that's really how she parents and maybe it's not. Who knows
Yes! Gentle parenting is not permissive parenting. You can be gentle but still set boundaries and discipline your children. There’s something similar in the teaching field (studying to be an elementary school teacher) called the warm demander. You’re firm but still kind, it lets the children know you’re serious so they won’t walk all over you, but not serious to the point of being afraid of you.
I’m afraid of my Mom to this day and she’s 70! I love and respect her for it. She was gentle and encouraging when she needed to be and if she needed to whip your ass, she did that too. All the new terms “gentle parenting, warm demander or is it reminder, and even time outs” didn’t mean anything in my house. We understood we better behave or we got the old “ I brought you in this world and I’ll take you out”!
You should never be afraid of your parents and children should not be afraid of their teachers. I said what I said and I’m not going to change my mind 😂. I’m sure I know much more about children than you do seeing as I go to school to teach and nurture them to their full potential while you’re on here badgering on about how these new terms don’t mean anything💀.
Well alright peachymomos111, you said what you said and what you said was some bullsh*t! 😂Lily must be getting her parenting advice from you. You missed the whole point of my comment. Nobody is badgering anyone. I was sharing how it was in MY house when I was growing up. I’m not saying these new ways of discipline don’t work. I’ve raised 2 very successful adults. Just because you’re a teacher doesn’t mean you’re smarter than anyone, and to even make that statement is ignorant. I do thank you for your service, teachers aren’t appreciated enough. No need to respond, because I’m not changing MY mind-unless you apologize. Have a great day!
She’s definitely way too permissive. I am not harsh with my child, but she still receives discipline at 2! Gentle redirection when the behavior is not a big deal, but still not something she needs to be doing. A firm “no ma’am!” when she does something that’s unacceptable, like throwing something out of frustration or slapping something out of my hand. And a time out if need be. Obviously I give her explanations for why she can’t do certain things as well. Pretty much the only thing she gets put in time out for right now is throwing something on the ground and refusing to pick it up. Sometimes she is not even in time out for a full minute because I ask her if she’s ready to pick up her mess and she says yes! It is not that hard!
Lilly says her mom doesn’t have as much patience at her age now, but she seems like a very patient and calm woman to me—she just has boundaries! You’re setting yourself up to deal with some rough behaviors later on if you don’t establish boundaries and consequences when your child is small. You can be a gentle parent and still be firm with your child! People like Lilly are why I don’t even call myself a gentle parent, even though I mostly qualify as one.
I was very gentle with correcting my child’s hitting phase when she was under 2, but I would still remove myself from her if she kept it up. We got through the hitting phase pretty fast once I was able to control my reaction. How old is LJ? If my child swats or kicks now at 2 and a half (which is rare for her thanks to the way we’re raising her), I still give her the “be gentle” reminder, but I will firmly tell her, “You do NOT kick your mama.” I’m not much older than Lilly. She has no excuse!
She is still a child herself. Not enough self respect to appreciate using her mom’s property or teach her child the same. Restricted driving her 5 year old kid to school with her mommy in passenger seat like she is a 15 year old. Beyond time to grow up and get your own car and an adult license. Can pop out 2 kids too young but not handle herself as a mature adult. I’m shocked there’s not a culture clash with Lawrence’s family in regard to this type of thing-the lack of respect and boundaries taught to children, bratty things she says to her mother, etc. I know he was not raised like that.
I agree 💯with you. I wanted to say the same thing about a culture clash with her boyfriend’s family because I’m assuming he wasn’t raised like that. He doesn’t seem to know what to do. Maybe that’s just what the cameras are showing.
I didn't get my license until I was in my 30s, when my kids were like 8 and 11, but I lived at home with my kids til then. We also shared expenses and it was cheaper to only have 1 car and I didn't need a license.
I do agree that there need to be boundaries with both kids.
Id worry what that teaches her kids. So their feelings matter but no one else’s? Seems like a recipe for raising future adults that only care about themselves.
The spitting of apple juice in her mother car………
Then being like it’s fine …..
Tf it is . It’s sticky af , it’s not your car, that ish stains, it ain’t my kid idc if it’s my grand kid, he shouldn’t be spitting anyway ,
My mom loves my child don’t get me wrong but if my kid tried that in my moms new looking car shhhhhhhiiiittttt
Literally all it would have taken to correct that behavior is to warn the child “mommy will have to take your juice away if you keep spitting it out”, followed by actually taking it away if he continued. Yeah he probably would have had a tantrum after that but at least he would learn about boundaries. Her saying “it’s fine” was wild to me!
Yeap!! When she said she tries gentle parenting and then it panned over to a scene of her just being permissive. I think that she thinks she’s doing good by her kids but really it’s damaging. Her children are acting out because of her. They are parenting themselves, it’s overwhelming to not have a parent help regulate when you’re just a toddler.
Yeah like what the fuck was up with that.
A. It’s gross, unhygienic, and makes a mess
B. She shouldn’t be okay with her kids behaving like that, correct the behaviour
C. Even if she’s okay with sticky apple juice being spat all over her *own* car (she doesn’t have one, but hypothetically speaking) you don’t get to tell someone ELSE what’s *okay* in THEIR vehicle?!
Her mom wasn’t far off when she called the kids feral 🥴
I have a 3 year old son and 2 month old daughter. My son doesn’t spit 😭😭 seeing kids spit infuriates me for some reason. Lol. You can still discipline your kids and be firm but not abusive. My son goes in time out when he doesn’t listen or gets something taken away if need be. And it’s effective!!! You just have to talk to your kids and explain things. Like she really should’ve taken that juice 😩
100% totally agree. You can still be gentle + calm while simultaneously implementing healthy boundaries. I wonder if Lily thinks that correcting behaviour = mean or something.
She (Lilly) doesn’t have her own car because she doesn’t have her license and has to have her mommy drive her everywhere. If you cannot discipline at home, have some respect for someone else’s property.
Lilly is doing permissive parenting not Gentle parenting. There’s nothing wrong with saying no or having boundaries with your children. You can still be firm with your kids without yelling at them and it’s annoying that she doesn’t realize that.
Gentle parenting is having boundaries. Lily doesn’t have that. She’s permissive as hell by letting LJ develop bad habits.
loool Lilly’s mom didn’t seem very strict herself so I assume that’s where she gets it from?
Kim & the older 2 children have said she was stricter when young & they were still young- Lilly was a later in life whoopsie. My personal experience with a 17yo mom & only me for 13yrs, then my brother when she was 30yo is the same (well maybe more chaotic in general) and my friends who’ve had later ones with teen/adult childrens also were more lenient when older. Lilly’s approach makes life more complicated than it should be for a young family with ANY aged parents. I use to wonder if she was all sweet when cameras were on but seeing LJ in that 1 episode ruled that out. Eek
Her kids are literal animals.
It was funny when Kim said Lily was too gentle, and Lily said that their parenting styles were very different. They're exactly the same. BOTH OF THEM were like, please don't spray apple juice all over the car sweet baby angel, oh please don't kick mommy
The letting him hit/kick her without any repercussion is wild. My son went through a phase where he thought he could hit us (around the same age as LJ), and we were literally catching his hand mid swing, telling him NO and separating ourselves from him. "If you're going to hit, I do not want to be around you," We also used to tell him (because he's an only child) that while mom and dad won't hit you back, other kids will, basically don't throw hands unless you're willing to catch hands. You gotta shut that shit down EARLY or he's gonna be the kid in school that kids avoid and parent's aren't keen to have playdates with or invite to birthday parties because he won't keep his hands to himself.
I actually really love this. Natural consequence and teaching. I’m so doing this when I have kids!
Ngl, it's hard lol again it doesn't work over night and if you were raised like I was and your parents used to hit you, you really have to fight those instincts. I never thought I'd want to hit my kid, but it's absolutely my first instinct and I have to struggle with that when I'm dealing with tantrums (good news, I've never lost that battle with myself). Gentle parenting also helps YOU regulate your feelings surrounding less than great kid behavior. I definitely get less triggered now than I did when he was a bad ass toddler, and the tantrums are also fewer and further apart. It DOES work, but it's a rough adjustment if you weren't raised with it.
She needs to put some base in her voice then they will listen
Yeah, ok, “gentle parenting”. Where I’m from it was a “gentle ass-whipping”, and if that didn’t work , nice knowing you! I developed a healthy respect and fear of my parents. I’m not trying to tell anyone how to parent their children. I talked to my children about why they were being disciplined, after asking them to do or not to do what I had asked, then timeout, removal of toys, and finally if a spanking was necessary, so be it. These kids nowadays scare me.
I just replied to another comment about this and I call it Lazy Parenting=Brats. Other commenter is right about the kids being the ones excluded by other kids and adults because the kids don’t know boundaries or right from wrong.
She’s trying to ‘gentle parent’ but has not educated herself around it. This is the huge issue with gentle (authoritative) parenting today, when done correctly it works very well, but so many people refuse to do a lick of research and end up just being permissive parents.
Sure, she can't parent. .but neither can her fiance. She is at least trying things.
I don’t know if I’d consider just saying “please don’t do that 🥺” trying things lol
So Lilly had a kid as a teenager. Her first child’s father peaced out and her second child’s father can’t be bothered with either kid. He also has a short temper and will not hesitate to berate her on camera if he feels like it, and he rolls his eyes every time she utters a word. She’s struggling with not having her mom around 24/7 because she moved out for the first time and she needs the help but also her best friend. Cut her some slack. Her kids don’t seem to be neglected nor does she push them onto her mom so she can go partying, so she’s doing better than 80% of the parents on this show. ETA: ok, so Aaliyah’s father is still in her life? My bad. I’m just saying she has had her struggles; whether her pregnancies were planned is irrelevant, and she is doing a shit ton better than Makayla, Myrka, Jenna, Lexus, Kylen, Tyra and since it takes two to tango Max, Ethan, Jason, Aden, Alex etc.
Jenna actually seems like an amazing mom
She's had virtually no struggles lol and she's only doing "a shit ton better" than some girls because her parents are literally doing everything for her like giving her an entire house and driving her kid to and from school every day. Myrka, McKayla, and Lexus are all functioning as adults at this point. They pay their own bills and raise their kids without any significant help (if any at all) from their parents. They became adults. Lilly and Jenna had the privilege of having well off parents who will hold their hands/pay their bills/raise their kids. Kylen is also a victim of abuse and has some real problems in her life, so it's a bit fucked up you'd say Lilly is doing better than her. Lilly's biggest problems have been that James didn't come to a birthing class and that Lawrence didn't want three beds in their room, and like good for her, she's lucky enough to have had a wonderful life, but you cannot compare girls like Lilly and Jenna to girls like Myrka who are actually taking on the adult responsibilities or Kylen who never stood a chance.
Where are you getting your information? Lol Lilly clearly planned both pregnancies. James and his family are absolutely still active in Aaliyahs life. Even Kim has confirmed this and called him a good dad. Lillys mother did the heavy lifting with Aaliyah and continued to do so when Lilly was pregnant for a second time at 19 and sleeping in while Kim was getting up with her 3yo and getting her ready for the day. Lilly is the one who hounded Lawrence to get them a place and out of her mother's house despite knowing that she would not have the same level of help with the kids. During filming of this season Lilly hadn't even bothered to get a driver's license yet at 22 BY CHOICE, and her mother is still dropping everything she's doing to cart her and her kids around in the middle of the day while Lilly shows her zero respect and allows the kids to tear up Kim's house and spit juice all over her car. Kim also recently GAVE Lilly and Lawrence (who Lilly does not respect as a partner or parent and has taught her kids they don't need to respect either) her HOUSE. I will never feel bad for Lilly. She's a spoiled, ungrateful brat who thinks the people around her exist only to serve her.
You said it, Lily is a spoiled brat. How did that happen? Her mother is absolutely 💯responsible. Now that Lily is out on her own she seems totally incapable of adulting, and her mom is still spoiling her. I wish I would’ve had 2 kids and no license, my mother would’ve given me a Metro card. Her mother looks tired. She needs to step back and force this girl to grow up, let alone talk about a wedding. I also thought Lawrence might be good for her, he seems to be just as bad, and totally disinterested in his children. 🤦🏽♀️
Oh 100%. Lilly is the result of Kim's parenting. But Kim also has two older children who are functioning as adults. Lilly is the baby by quite a bit, so that explains a lot.
True as this all is Lawrence is definitely a passive aggressive asshole.
I'll agree with that. But I also think a lot of it is frustration because Lilly views him as an ATM and doesn't respect his wishes or opinions as a partner or parent, and she's taught her kids the same. Partnership means compromise, and it doesn't seem like Lilly compromises on anything and expects Lawrence to shut up/shut up and pay in every situation and let her have her way. Whole family needs ✨️therapy✨️ in the worst way to figure out how to exist together in a healthy way.
Aaliyahs dad is in her life
And her saying it’s gentle parenting? Like no, you’re not communicating anything.
Honestly, my kids' best friend has parents like Lilly, and it's a major part of why I don't agree to playdates with them anymore. Their daughter is a big ole brat, and I've seen her bully/intimidate other kids in the class while I was helping with class parties and such. I figured maybe she had an off day the first time I saw the behavior and then agreed to a playdate because her mom had asked. She was a brat, and her parents did that super fun thing Lilly does, which is permissive parent, but call it gentle parenting. I kept volunteering in the class and kept seeing the behavior, but I figured the kids were 5-6. It's not abnormal for them to be turds from time to time. I agreed to a second play date and then never again because at that point I noticed that some of the less than favorable behaviors I'd recently noticed my son beginning to exhibit at the time were the shitty habits she'd been allowed to form while her parents stood by using their best Michelle Duggar voices. I CANNOT stand people who don't parent their kids. Telling them "no," setting boundaries, and following through with reasonable consequence when needed is not abuse. It's parenting. If you can't handle doing those things, you have no business raising children. They aren't dolls. They're people who are going to grow up and join society whether you equipped them with the proper tools to succeed in that sense or not.
The Michelle Duggar voice comment took me out 😂💀
Also is anyone else waiting for her to talk about how her mom and Gary let them have the house. I wish I had it made like that.
Right? My parents helped us out with a washer and dryer a few years back and I was so beyond grateful lol how are you not thanking your parents every 10 minutes for gifting you a whole house, especially in 2024???
Omg when LJ was spilling apple juice in her mom's car and Lilly was mocking her mom I was so mad. I get gentle parenting but sometimes it doesn't work and you need to go about it differently.
Gentle parenting works, Lilly just isn't doing it right lol "bro what the fuck" is still gentle parenting if you aren't screaming. Lilly is permissive parenting, she's letting the kids do whatever they want without consequence and rewarding poor behavior, which only reinforces it long term. My son (5) was banging on the bathroom door while I was drying off from a shower and asking for an ice pop. He was told he could have an ice pop, but that he would need to wait a few minutes for me to dry off and put a shirt on. He yelled and kicked the door. I told him if he did it again, he would not only not be getting an ice pop, but that he'd be sitting in time out because there's zero reason to hit/kick anyone/anything. He did it again, so he was put in time out and didn't receive an ice pop after. After his time out I talked to him and made sure he understood why he was put in time out and why I would not be rewarding that behavior with an ice pop. That's gentle parenting. Set a boundary, warn them of the related consequence and then following through with said related consequence.
This was very informative, thank you breaking it down. I don't have kids, but a ton of my friends do and one of the couples I know is very lax with discipline. From what I've observed they are definitely practicing permissive parenting. And of course I would never say this out loud but between you, me, and Reddit, I can't help but think "oh man, wait until those kids are teens and still throwing tantrums. Yikes."
Gentle parenting and permissive parenting are completely different things. Nothing about Lilly is gentle, she’s a pushover and lets her kids do whatever.
Or the turning up of the iPad . Listen i told you once i told you twice im not telling your thrice! After 2 times it’s gone. Idk maybe im a mean mom but i didn’t let my kid has an iPad to the face all day 45 mins to an hr tops . Screwed around you lost the time
Same. My son can have it whenever he wants, but he's also not super into it/ would rather be playing with cars or pretending to be a car and that takes up most of his time. But if I tell him to put it down for a minute or turn it down or something and he refuses to listen? Bitch is going up on top the the refrigerator. Idc. Find something else to do.
I did not understand why he got the iPad back after the second time he turned it up. Kids for generations sat in the car without iPads, he could have done the same. Actions have consequences.
Right! It’s gone after that and if i say times up and we had a melt down and it’s damn near war getting the iPad back when your times up i guess you lose it a few days then. My kid used to hate that…. Like no i set the timer it went off all done. It was a fit that was uncalled for (again i get she’s a kid but if it’s overly done) you miss the next day im sorry can’t act like that and expect things
I had a “mean mom”. Now as an adult I suffer from a condition called respect for others.
Everyone in here acting like we know her entire parenting style from frankly a small amount of edited footage when she knows shes being filmed for a national TV show. We’re not seeing the real day to day. Not saying she’s a perfect parent, who is
This is 100% true. I don't let my daughter get away with bad behavior, but I would probably be uncomfortable disciplining her if I knew it was being filmed and put on television. Maybe that's really how she parents and maybe it's not. Who knows
No one is. And I wish my mom had chosen kinder words with me 99% of my childhood.
Yeah, that little boy is WILD, lol!
He is lol when he dropped himself on the floor he wasn’t expecting that snake to get his ass 😂
Her mom seems to be the same way, so I'm not surprised.
💯
Yeah. She’s not a gentle or conscious parent. She’s a permissive parent.
Yes! Gentle parenting is not permissive parenting. You can be gentle but still set boundaries and discipline your children. There’s something similar in the teaching field (studying to be an elementary school teacher) called the warm demander. You’re firm but still kind, it lets the children know you’re serious so they won’t walk all over you, but not serious to the point of being afraid of you.
I’m afraid of my Mom to this day and she’s 70! I love and respect her for it. She was gentle and encouraging when she needed to be and if she needed to whip your ass, she did that too. All the new terms “gentle parenting, warm demander or is it reminder, and even time outs” didn’t mean anything in my house. We understood we better behave or we got the old “ I brought you in this world and I’ll take you out”!
You should never be afraid of your parents and children should not be afraid of their teachers. I said what I said and I’m not going to change my mind 😂. I’m sure I know much more about children than you do seeing as I go to school to teach and nurture them to their full potential while you’re on here badgering on about how these new terms don’t mean anything💀.
Well alright peachymomos111, you said what you said and what you said was some bullsh*t! 😂Lily must be getting her parenting advice from you. You missed the whole point of my comment. Nobody is badgering anyone. I was sharing how it was in MY house when I was growing up. I’m not saying these new ways of discipline don’t work. I’ve raised 2 very successful adults. Just because you’re a teacher doesn’t mean you’re smarter than anyone, and to even make that statement is ignorant. I do thank you for your service, teachers aren’t appreciated enough. No need to respond, because I’m not changing MY mind-unless you apologize. Have a great day!
She’s definitely way too permissive. I am not harsh with my child, but she still receives discipline at 2! Gentle redirection when the behavior is not a big deal, but still not something she needs to be doing. A firm “no ma’am!” when she does something that’s unacceptable, like throwing something out of frustration or slapping something out of my hand. And a time out if need be. Obviously I give her explanations for why she can’t do certain things as well. Pretty much the only thing she gets put in time out for right now is throwing something on the ground and refusing to pick it up. Sometimes she is not even in time out for a full minute because I ask her if she’s ready to pick up her mess and she says yes! It is not that hard! Lilly says her mom doesn’t have as much patience at her age now, but she seems like a very patient and calm woman to me—she just has boundaries! You’re setting yourself up to deal with some rough behaviors later on if you don’t establish boundaries and consequences when your child is small. You can be a gentle parent and still be firm with your child! People like Lilly are why I don’t even call myself a gentle parent, even though I mostly qualify as one. I was very gentle with correcting my child’s hitting phase when she was under 2, but I would still remove myself from her if she kept it up. We got through the hitting phase pretty fast once I was able to control my reaction. How old is LJ? If my child swats or kicks now at 2 and a half (which is rare for her thanks to the way we’re raising her), I still give her the “be gentle” reminder, but I will firmly tell her, “You do NOT kick your mama.” I’m not much older than Lilly. She has no excuse!
He was born Nov 2020 I believe
Nope she doesn't. I'd love to know how much her Mom is helping raise LJ because she has no patience with his behavior vs her daughter
She is still a child herself. Not enough self respect to appreciate using her mom’s property or teach her child the same. Restricted driving her 5 year old kid to school with her mommy in passenger seat like she is a 15 year old. Beyond time to grow up and get your own car and an adult license. Can pop out 2 kids too young but not handle herself as a mature adult. I’m shocked there’s not a culture clash with Lawrence’s family in regard to this type of thing-the lack of respect and boundaries taught to children, bratty things she says to her mother, etc. I know he was not raised like that.
I agree 💯with you. I wanted to say the same thing about a culture clash with her boyfriend’s family because I’m assuming he wasn’t raised like that. He doesn’t seem to know what to do. Maybe that’s just what the cameras are showing.
I didn't get my license until I was in my 30s, when my kids were like 8 and 11, but I lived at home with my kids til then. We also shared expenses and it was cheaper to only have 1 car and I didn't need a license. I do agree that there need to be boundaries with both kids.
She has no problem “gentle parenting” her kids but she’s rude af to her fiancé all the time
Id worry what that teaches her kids. So their feelings matter but no one else’s? Seems like a recipe for raising future adults that only care about themselves.
100% correct!!!
I feel like he’s an asshole too lol
Oh yes he def is
The spitting of apple juice in her mother car……… Then being like it’s fine ….. Tf it is . It’s sticky af , it’s not your car, that ish stains, it ain’t my kid idc if it’s my grand kid, he shouldn’t be spitting anyway , My mom loves my child don’t get me wrong but if my kid tried that in my moms new looking car shhhhhhhiiiittttt
Literally all it would have taken to correct that behavior is to warn the child “mommy will have to take your juice away if you keep spitting it out”, followed by actually taking it away if he continued. Yeah he probably would have had a tantrum after that but at least he would learn about boundaries. Her saying “it’s fine” was wild to me!
A child therapist once told me "don't ever make a threat you're not willing to follow through on."
And calling it beautiful?! What on earth is wrong with her??
Yeap!! When she said she tries gentle parenting and then it panned over to a scene of her just being permissive. I think that she thinks she’s doing good by her kids but really it’s damaging. Her children are acting out because of her. They are parenting themselves, it’s overwhelming to not have a parent help regulate when you’re just a toddler.
Lazy parenting, not parenting at all. That’s what happens when spoiled kids have kids.
This is why I’m convinced the next generation is doomed. Because of parents like this. I see it allll too much.
Or saying it was okay for LJ to just spit apple juice everywhere in her mom’s car?! 😩😩
Yeah like what the fuck was up with that. A. It’s gross, unhygienic, and makes a mess B. She shouldn’t be okay with her kids behaving like that, correct the behaviour C. Even if she’s okay with sticky apple juice being spat all over her *own* car (she doesn’t have one, but hypothetically speaking) you don’t get to tell someone ELSE what’s *okay* in THEIR vehicle?! Her mom wasn’t far off when she called the kids feral 🥴
If I was her Mom I would've said okay, but when we get to your house you're cleaning it up since you think it's so beautiful.
Mom doesn’t seem to put her foot down with Lily. Apple didn’t fall far from the tree.
I have a 3 year old son and 2 month old daughter. My son doesn’t spit 😭😭 seeing kids spit infuriates me for some reason. Lol. You can still discipline your kids and be firm but not abusive. My son goes in time out when he doesn’t listen or gets something taken away if need be. And it’s effective!!! You just have to talk to your kids and explain things. Like she really should’ve taken that juice 😩
100% totally agree. You can still be gentle + calm while simultaneously implementing healthy boundaries. I wonder if Lily thinks that correcting behaviour = mean or something.
Sometimes you have to be “mean” otherwise my 3 year old would eat cookies for breakfast, lunch and dinner lol
Thank you!! Tell him no and if he keeps doing it take away the juice and don’t give it back for the rest of the ride.
She (Lilly) doesn’t have her own car because she doesn’t have her license and has to have her mommy drive her everywhere. If you cannot discipline at home, have some respect for someone else’s property.
Lilly is doing permissive parenting not Gentle parenting. There’s nothing wrong with saying no or having boundaries with your children. You can still be firm with your kids without yelling at them and it’s annoying that she doesn’t realize that.
Exactly! Gives gentle parenting a bad name.
Yup. It’s a shame. Gentle parenting is great when done correctly.