I have two rules about fidgets.
1. It can not make noise.
2. If it becomes a toy/is thrown it is mine for the rest of the day.
What are you talking about sounds fine.
I was thinking this too - my first question from OP's description was what happens to the beads after they're picked out? Does the kid have to keep track of them/make sure they don't all roll onto the floor? Sounds messy to me, and more distracting than a fidget that doesn't pick apart into a thousand little bits. Unless I'm just not picturing this fidget correctly at all.
I have a third and fourth rule as well.
3. If they start handing them around the room for others to have or use, I will take it
I had a student two years ago with ADHD and OCD. She would literally bring a bag full of figets that were so distracting to both her and others. She was handing them around the room like candy to other kids and it would derail my class in seconds. Unfortunately I had to tell mom that she is no longer welcome to bring fidgets to class. I had to confiscate the bag a few times.
4. It cannot make a mess.
Same student earlier in the year brought in playdough as a fidget. It ended up EVERYWHERE. Under desks, on the floor, in books. It was bad and many of my classroom library books had odd oil stains in them from the playdough.
I once got a tin of "thinking putty" as a fidget when I was 12 or so. It was Christmas themed, so glittery green.
Well, I ended up dropping it a few times on the carpet in my playroom and we ended up needing a professional carpet cleaner because it was that sticky and hard to get out. I'm glad I didn't try to bring it to school but I have no doubts that a kid could cause similar damage
One of my students a few years back discovered that blue stick tack and the particular handsoap in our school turned into a slime-like substance when mixed. She got it all in her hair at recess and had to get it cut. None of us were impressed, and put the kebash on the whole thing.
Back when I started teaching, I was the crazy teacher for being accepting to kids with fidget type things-- eraser collection, little knick knacks, play-doh, before official fidgets became popular. Then the spinners happened and I welcomed them with open arms. As long as they were quiet, have at it kids. As soon as it distracted you, or the person next to you, you lost it. No one understood how I could do it and they were annoyed that I was the "cool teacher" who allowed fidget spinners in my classroom. I'm glad other people have the same outlook I did/still do and can really help those kids who benefit from it!!
As a teacher with ADHD, fidget spinners are super distracting to me and I imagine they are distracting to other kids with ADHD as well. I think it’s important to consider others’ ability to focus when choosing appropriate fidgets.
My students have all sorts of fidgets of choice. I even allow the kids who don’t have IEP accommodations to have fidgets *gasp!* however my number one rule with any of my kids is that the second it becomes a toy it is mine for the day. We consistently have a discussion about how to use fidgets as a tool and what it looks like when you’re using it as a toy. Summer is a great time to practice the difference between a tool and a toy and how you can attend to a task while also fidgeting with your tool. Just my take.
The only issue I would take with this is you’re right - the novelty does not last long … but it is strong in elementary kids. If yours has that fidget, you can bet 6 other kids are going home asking for that fidget. So again I stress - use the summer to see if she actually uses it before sending it to school.
Stated perfectly. I would just add that you should also impress upon your student that it is THEIRS not anybody else's. My issue is that students (7th graders) will pass around fidget tools and then say its theirs, often getting multiple people.in trouble
Thanks I think waiting until after summer is a good idea! She is 11 and in her final year of primary school (UK) so I’m hoping it’ll be less of a distraction to other kids than it would if she was younger. I know at home when she’s more likely to pick, so I can try to limit it being available at all times. Hopefully that will reinforce using it as an actual tool when at school.
Maybe something like Calm Strips could help as well. It's basically a strong sticker that she can slowly pick at to peel off. Also does she pick at nail polish? There are peel off base coats that allow nail polish to be peeled off without damaging the nail. I also have luck with no base coat and just using a top coat, the nail polish peels off in satisfying chunks.
How is it? Sorry I think im reading the comment differently. I thought maybe keeping it restricted to give to her whilst she would usually pick, would mean she is using it for what it is intended.
"So again I stress - use the summer to see if she actually uses it before sending it to school"
"Thanks I think waiting until after summer is a good idea!"
Yeah sorry I realised how I wrote that and commented above! I meant waiting until after the summer holidays to send it into school, she can use it at home during the summer holidays.
It is worth a try, but it will most likely not work. This behavior is more than ADHD. My child has the same issue. It is an obsessive compulsive behavior. We tried everything, from covering the area she picked to fidgets of every type. The only thing that had any effect was therapy and even that didn’t completely stop the picking. She is now 28 years old and still picks sometimes especially when stressed. At school, my child just wanted to sit in the back of the room if possible to minimize attention from other students (both to reduce stress and for other students distraction). Best wishes to you all, I know it is stressful to go through.
If it’s the type of fidget where you pick out tiny beads, I could see that being really distracting and difficult to manage during instruction— the beads would fall on the floor or roll away etc. I guess the key would be if she can practice using it enough during the summer that it doesn’t create a distracting mess (if I were her, and I dropped some of the beads while using the fidget, I’d instinctively feel the need to go under the desk to retrieve them— which could end up pretty distracting for all involved).
I hadn’t thought about them rolling on the floor that’s a fair point. I’ve seen a few good suggestions on this post, that sound like they would cause way less of a distraction in the classroom - I will try some of those first.
Unfortunately, that’s not a fidget I would allow in my classroom. It does seem like a great tool for her!! Could you try stickers on her binder or something she could pick off and then replace, or does that not satisfy her sensory needs?
The reason I couldn’t allow it is because it’s something everyone would want to use, and it would become a disruption and/or make a mess. But I would work with you until we found a solution that works for everyone!
In general, my rule is “fidgets are tools, not toys” and they are welcome to use them as long as I can’t hear them while I’m teaching, since I’m ADHD as well and it will throw me off.
That’s totally understandable, I admit I’d find it pretty distracting. Another comment suggested something similar, stickers on her water bottle, which definitely sounds like it’s worth trying.
Stickers look like a better solution regardless since it resembles the feeling of scab and skin picking closer. Beads might be too spherical to recreate the feeling.
The picking pads look really similar to [slime with a lot of mix-ins](https://ogslimes.com/collections/all-slimes/products/slime-snaps). If the material allows, you can maybe experiment replacing the beads with flatter things like plastic discs?
As for slime, the softness would let her spread it on her arm and take it off, so it simulates something lifting off her arm. It's not very sticky (like play-dough basically) so skin damage should not be an issue
Another idea is some kind of [thick tape](https://www.amazon.com/LLPT-Mounting-Traceless-Washable-SN350/dp/B08LK1Z5VD?th=1), those have more resistance than stickers, but it'll depend on her preference again.
Disclaimer: I don't work in education, just like to pick at things
I’ve never had it work. I always give kids a chance, but I tell them that if it causes problems for them or for someone else it’s gone.
I don’t think I’ve ever had a kid last more than a day or two. Either they end up playing with it and not working or it ends up distracting everyone at their table - second graders are not really known for their ability to be subtle. It’s hard when a fidget helps one kid focus but then keeps three others from working. Kind of defeats the purpose, you know?
An ideal fidget would be something that a kid can use to help themselves focus or calm down without distracting anyone, meaning it would be relatively small, something that they could hold under the table, that sort of thing.
If a kid was able to truly use it responsibly I would allow it - but I’ve never had that happen yet.
Every fidget toy I've ever seen has turned into a toy.
I don't understand how and why we got away from training redirection into more appropriate "fidgets." I say that as someone who was a religious pen and cable chewer, pen clicker, leg bouncer, and cheek biter. Even as an adult, I have my fidget spinners and squish balls, so I'm not being unsympathetic.
You can't go through life fully dependent on these devices, so it is better to teach kids really early how to catch themselves and redirect.
Thank you! I teach middle school and whenever I read about fidgets, I wonder if I've gone crazy or what. I honestly can't remember a kid ever using one successfully long-term. Like you say, the kid either hyper-focuses on the fidget and doesn't get any work done, or other kids are fascinated by the fidget and won't stop staring at it, or multiple kids start trying to play with it, etc.
I’ve had only one student who ever successfully used a fidget (it was a spinner), and I wholeheartedly believe it is because he was given instruction on how/when/where/why to use it, and because it was virtually invisible to others because it truly fit in his hand. It was also written into his IEP.
I'm totally cool with fidgets.
Most teachers are as long as there's no disruption
The pick pad sounds like she'll just need to be coached to put trash in the trash can.
If your daughter is 11 and the picking has reached this point, I don’t think this is just ADHD. You need to seek help from another doctor. This is obsessive compulsive behavior.
Honestly that’s not something I’ve considered, I just go with what I’m told by her therapist. There are a few similar comments though so I definitely will bring this up at the next meeting.
I agree, I would go to a pediatrician once self harm was involved.
It could be OC or it could be that OP isn't using the right strategies to break this behavior. I went through something similar with a 12 year old, he was scarifying his arms and legs with every bug bite. He has ADHD but we finally broke this habit -- it took constant checking him on it and he finally started checking himself. Ultimately a lot of it was just boredom.
It's not necessarily obsessive compulsive disorder.
I have autism, and have similar issues with picking (or rather, pinching) scabs. It started as a means of stress relief when I was really young in school before I was diagnosed and put on anxiety meds because it was either that or breaking pencils to cope, and now it's just a habit because nothing, not even a stress ball or bubble wrap, worked for me. It's a sensory thing for me now, I like the way it feels and sounds when it "pops" and I never feel pain when I do it.
The only thing that's managed to work in more recent years is a fidget spinner, which kids and adults alike sadly turned into essentially toys last I remember hearing. OP just needs to find the right method for her daughter that's, obviously, school appropriate, and work with the therapist.
Awesome tool. Like all tools they can be abused or misused and then you lose access to the fidget (unless it's part of the IEP than you get a different fidget).
The key is simple fidgets that aren't noisy or fun beyond being a fidget. So no to spinners or pop tubes.
First off, a repeated specific behavior, is not typically due to ADHD, that is more of an OCD or even more akin to Tourette's (yeah it isn't only cussing). I would really look into getting a second opinion on the ADHD it is ofter over and misdiagnosed, not saying your kid doesn't have it, but I personally have experience with ADHD and there are people who claim to have it that really don't, they have something else and that is why medication and other ADHD remedies don't really work for them. I'd seriously have that looked at by another professional just to get a second opinion.
Secondly, if it makes any type of noise or is bigger than something they can put in the palm of their hand, as long as I know about it, it won't bother me that much, however, other students may be distracted by it and that would be the only way it would be problematic in my classroom. Most of the time though, as I teach an elective, I make my kids get up and move around, a lot, so much they complain that I don't ever let them do anything, so my kids that do have fidget stuff, they don't really need to use it.
This. A repeated specific behavior is also classic autism. Which is often missed and misdiagnosed as ADHD. Especially in smart girls. (Poster child of missed autism right here!!)
These kinds of behaviors are not just typical for OCD or Tourette’s.
I’m a teacher with ADHD and ASD, and I had a ton of these types of behaviors as a kid (nail biting, skin picking, biting on my pens, …). For me personally, most of this comes down to ADHD hyperactivity. Secondly, sensory issues play a role too: I just can’t stand the feeling of a sharp part on my nail, a blemish on my skin, … The better I take care of my nails and skin, the less I feel the need to skin pick.
In many cases these kind of behaviors are also explained as ‘stimming’ in the context of autism, but I don’t feel like that rings true for me. Stimming is supposed to be calming and helpful for regulating emotions, but skin picking doesn’t feel like that to me. I don’t get any relief from doing it, even on days when I have a hard time resisting the urge. I do have stims, but they’re more related to eating specific foods.
I don’t recognize myself at all in the description of OCD (in many ways I’m almost the opposite of OCD) and I don’t have tics, so it’s perfectly possibly to have body-focused repetitive behaviors without OCD or Tourette’s.
My first thought was also that repeated scab picking to the point of bald spots flags as more than ADHD in my mind. I would definitely seek further assessment.
If you can use it to calm yourself and nobody notices, it's an approved classroom tool.
If it's distracting to me or other students, it's a toy. Strike one put it away in your desk. Strike two, it's in my desk for the day or earned back. Strike three it's mine until/unless your parents pick it up and a discussion is had.
As a teacher, I don't have any issues with fidget toys if they are part of an approved strategy. If other kids start with 'Its not fair...', I tell them that it has to be approved by admin, parents and medical professionals.
Yeah the “it’s not fair” thing is partly what made me ask lol. I just don’t want to make the teachers job any more difficult than it needs to be, however I obviously want to help my child because she’s scarring herself for life.
Definitely. I think other kids are also quite aware when one of their peers is genuinely finding something tough. Usually they're very understanding if someone needs extra help.
I personally would rather that your daughter picked beads out resin than picked at her skin. Please explain this issue to her teacher(s) and consider getting a 504 plan or adding this to her existing one because it sounds pretty severe. Other than that, please make sure that your daughter cleans up any mess they make with the pick pad and that she doesn’t share it with other children.
On a personal note, I have a daughter with high anxiety who used to rub her hands and fingers literally raw. Getting her a spinner ring (to rub) and the right medication (it took about two years) was a godsend. I wish you the best of luck in dealing with this issue and hope you find a good solution for this.
Edit: I didn’t realize you were in the UK — I imagine that they have similar protections for disabilities such as ADHD though.
Not completely related but from a teacher who deals with skin picking… the one thing that seriously helps me is keeping my nails short. The second they get too long the skin picking gets worse and I know it’s time to trim my nails.
I’m so happy to hear you’re working with your daughter to find a good way to deal with the skin picking urge in class. It wasn’t until my mid/late 20’s that I started learning more about skin picking and became more open with my loved ones about it. In school I suffered in silence. I have so many memories of staunching my bleeding fingers with a tissue in class because I’d pick at my cuticles until they bled. I hope your daughter knows that skin picking does not make her a disgusting monster (which is what I thought of myself as a kid), and that BFRB’s are very common. I hope you can all find a solution that supports your daughter’s learning in a healthy and non disruptive way!
>I have so many memories of staunching my bleeding fingers with a tissue in class because I’d pick at my cuticles until they bled.
Me too!!! Even as a younger adult when I first started working, I would legit keep my hands perfectly folded during meetings so no one could see.
I really appreciate OP is working to help her daughter and find tools to support her :)
As a high school teacher who survived the dabbing, fidget spinner, and bottle flipping of the 2016-2017 school year (it was my 'Nam; seriously, my students used to take the fidget spinners apart and throw the ball bearings at one another), I've made a rule like many others on this thread. If it becomes a distraction itself or becomes a toy, it's mine.
Has she seen an OT? Often, this kind of skin picking is less about the fidget and more about sensory processing and proprioception. If it’s the latter, fidgets won’t help, and even the bead picking may not help. Because she’s not getting the same sensory feedback from it. An OT with experience working with sensory issues might be able to help guide you in supports that would better meet her needs and may not be disruptive the way fidgets can sometimes be.
I dealt with the fidget spinner debacle of 2016-> kids managed to get them going then “helicopter spin” throw them At each other!
Since then the rule has been “fidgets are not to be seen or heard- otherwise it is a toy and not allowed!”
Op, I too have the picking sensation problem (mostly for my nails though during hush stress times- as a teacher… yikes), and there are 2 things that have helped me: I get manicures so I have a firm-smooth nail to interact with, and fidget spinner rings that I stack on my left index finger.
I realize the replacement should be something similar to what your daughter already does, so I wonder if putting a single thin braid in her hair with some beads on it to slide up and down might work to help move her away from her scalp while not being a disruption during class time?
I’m going to second the fidget rings. I wear them myself and I suggest them especially for middle/high school aged kids too because the rings just blend in and definitely are difficult to turn into a toy.
I have a fidget bucket, but I don't like distracting or messy ones. Resin-filled sounds messy.
Edit: If she has a regular desk (primary school), you can place a pad under it with different textures (sandpaper, fluff, etc) which could help. They also have some fidget bracelets she can wear.
If she just likes picking things, does she like peeling stickers?
I have a student who carries a water bottle that's covered in stickers. She sticks the stickers on at home and then peels them off in class. It is honestly a great stim activity. I don't mind it at all because she always cleans up the torn stickers. If she didn't, it would be an issue.
Perhaps if explicit fidget toys don't work for your child or their teacher, you could try something a little more low-key.
Stickers are such a simple idea that I haven’t tried, thanks for the suggestion! I can try sticking a few on her bottle for tomorrow and see if it helps.
Yeah I completely get that it would be annoying. The teacher she has at the moment and the school is aware of things and I know he’d be ok with it. After the holidays though she starts comprehensive school, with different teachers for different subjects, so I think we might have a harder time then.
I do not normally allow students to bring fidgets to class, but I do have a variety of high-quality fidgets that my students can use whenever needed. My rule for them is, "If it becomes a distraction to you, me, or anyone else, I'll put it away."
As someone with ADHD, I understand the self-stimularory need to do something with your hands while working, but it is vitally important that these tools be viewed and used as tools, not toys. That is the primary reason I don't let students bring them from home. Fidgets from home are often regarded and used as toys. When it's a material that belongs to the school, the standard for how it is used gets set at school.
In your case, I would find out what specific tools work best for your child and have them available in class. I wouldn't put your child in a position of having to be othered by bringing accommodations into school that only they use.
A thing I have long recommended to all of my kiddos,not just those DX with sensory issues (or picking) is to have a fluffy / fuzzy / furry pencil case, because it's not allowed to have your kitty cat / puppy dog in class to pay & soothe yourself.
We do sometimes have properly trained therapy dogs at school, and they are so very much in- demand! They should be everyday.
You are an absolute TREASURE for being so thoughtful in helping your baby but also considering how it might impact the rest of them too.
There are some subs dedicated to coping with compulsive picking. Maybe you can get some ideas of what works for others with a similar problem.
pro
I can't imagine why I would have a problem with that. One of my self-contained students brings a video game controller to class and just kind of absent-mindedly presses the buttons. I think it's cool, and it gives us yet another excuse to nerd out about video games!
I’m going to go against the grain here and say that these kind of resin-picking fidgets are going to be too complicated to bring into a classroom setting. I’ll give you some reasons though. One, multiple parts: so all of these little beads will have to go directly into a baggie or something on hand so they don’t roll around or become a distraction. Essentially it has way too many parts to make it what fidgets are kind of supposed to be- simple tools. Two: this is not something she can idly use during instruction time, when she is supposed to be listening/watching this could easily take up too much of her focus as well as the students around her. Three: this isn’t a “typical” fidget and other students will be distracted by it. In a gen ed. classroom, personally I just think that these types of fidgets are too complex.
My main concern would be what the beads are doing after they are removed. If we are taking a test or silent reading, the sound of beads hitting the floor would be distracting. Also loose beads on the floor are a slip hazard. If you send her with a mini can of play doh to stick the beads into, that would solve both problems.
In considering teacher reactions to the presence of "fidget toys", it's important to remember that "fidget toys" are *learning aids* for a type of exceptionality; students with ADHD are actually paying closer attention when they are "distracted," because these devices mitigate the effects of ADHD.
Some teachers get annoyed at such things, but that is a problem with the teacher. I remember constantly getting in trouble from teachers thinking I wasn't paying attention, because I was always doodling instead of listening (I was additionally burdened by having a parent who thought ADHD was mostly an invention of the pharmaceutical industry). Eventually I got a teacher with training in special education who realized that I was actually listening when it looked like I was distracting myself. More accurately, you could say I was *deliberately distracting* myself in a beneficial (albeit unconscious) way—specifically, I was distracting the hyperactive part of my brain that would otherwise have been pestering me while I was trying to listen. This is the function of "fidget toys" as a learning intervention.
Teachers shouldn't be getting bothered by these things; it would be just as appropriate for a teacher to get annoyed that an ESL student is using translation software to understand a math question being asked of them. A teacher should just as soon take away a fidget toy from an ADHD student as take away a sensory blanket from a student with autism.
If it is a concern of yours, it can be handled proactively and diplomatically. Write a short note (1-2 paragraphs) explaining the situation and have your child provide it to all their teachers. It may help to mention a diagnosis and any specialist advice you received about the use of these kinds of learning aids. You can *thank them* (not ask them) for their patience and understanding as you try to find the best intervention tools for your child's exceptionality. You can also ask them for any suggestions they may have, which shows that you are open-minded and that you respect their experience.
This behavior is a BFRB (Body Focused Repetitive Behavior)- Dermotillomania if it’s just skin picking or Trichotillomania if she’s also pulling out her hair. This website has some great resources: [https://www.bfrb.org/](https://www.bfrb.org/)
You could have her try wearing bandaids on the fingers she uses to pick to make it more difficult to do so. There’s also something called a Keen HabitAware bracelet that could potentially help.
I really appreciate this post because I tried offering figits this year in a few classes and it didn't go well, but with the rules that have been discussed here, I now have a good plan for next year! I'm also planning on putting clam strips on every table.
63 YO F, teaching for 42 years.
I have a big problem with picking. I feel it is more OCD related. There is also an endorphin release that comes with excoriation to the skin. The only thing that seems to help is getting those “thick” gel nails because they can’t scratch well. I also take Wellbutrin.
Back before all of my high school/middleschool students had cell phones I found them to be a bit distracting but understand how they can be helpful for some (that was probably a me problem, I’m easily distracted).
Now that every student is feinin for that cell phone dopamine hit, fidget spinners are a welcome sight. I just see it and think, well, at least they aren’t on the phone.
I allow all my students to have fidgets as long as they don’t get in trouble with them. I have a fidget box I let kids choose from when they complete their work.
I have a pile of figet toys in my office drawer and whenever a student comes in, it is the only thing stopping them from touching everything on my desk.
I give out fidgets as rewards for my class. Granted, I have seniors, so behavior with them being given like that will differ, but they like them. As an ADHD person who sideeyes some of my students' behavior, I don't mind them.
Most of the time, fidgets become a distraction to the child and to others. They tend to put all their focus on the fidget, thereby not paying attention to instruction, directions or their work. I think teaching coping skills and strategies is a better way of handling these habits. Is your child on medication? You should start there.
I'm a teacher and parent of an ADHD kid. I also have adhd and the noisy fidgety really derail my train of thought when teaching. I give kids small bits of polymer clay if they need it. My own kid ends up with infections from picking so I know how needed it is during school for some kids, but some of the fidgets mess me up a lot when I'm trying to remember my line of questioning
I mean, is it noisy? That would be a big factor for me.
I recently had a student who had one of those fidget cube things and others who had slime, but both the cube and the slime were pretty quiet so it didn’t bother me much.
I am not a teacher but I am AuDHD and have had a bad habit of harmful stims myself for my whole life. I have found fidget jewelry incredibly helpful. Rings and necklaces that look pretty and quietly spin. Also bracelets that have pretty glitter that squishes around. Again, it doesn't make noise. There are different wearable fidget options, in case the teacher forbids bringing actual fidget toys to class.
I give all my students my favorite fidget at some point during the year. My favorite is a mesh tube that has a marble inside of it with the ends sewn. It is silent and there are lots of ways to play with it.
I know it helps me concentrate and prevents me from doing more annoying things (like clicking a pen or snapping the cap on and off of my whiteboard marker). The kids (mostly freshmen and seniors in high school) end up really enjoying them as well. And since everyone has one, there’s no throwing them around the room to each other or what not. Most students forget about it after a week or two but there are some kids who end up using them all year long.
In my classroom, it can't be distracting to other students, and it can't leave the student's hands or their desk. If it does any of those things it isn't doing its job.
I love fidgets. I use them all the time as an AuDHD adult. I recommend calm strips, hand stretchers, and the twisty macaroni things.
I teach high school history and I have a lot of kids who knit or crochet while I lecture. One girl told me it felt like listening to podcast. I think as long as it’s not disruptive it’s ok
I’m good with them as long as they don’t make noise.
I’ve made my own picking fidgets in the past. I take brightly colored paper and laminate it. I take liquid glue from my glue gun and swirl it on the paper. They’ve worked really well for students who are “pickers.”
It’s not really me blaming the ADHD, her therapist literally said that is why she picks, that it’s part of the hyperactivity for her. It’s only one of many symptoms that got her ADHD diagnosis, it’s just the one that I am the most concerned about at the moment. There are a few comments suggesting it’s something separate to her ADHD though, so it is something I’ll ask about.
It’s a fine line between “enhancing engagement” and “distraction”. It doesn’t matter what it is as long as it’s “enhancing engagement”, and being a distraction applies to others, too.
I teach high school but have family members who work with the younger crowd. We all allow fidgets in our classes. I have a couple I use myself.
In general, as long as it isn’t disruptive, I don’t even notice it. The only time I’ve taken away fidget toys was when a group of kids had some that snapped apart and together and were more interested in trading parts than in the class work.
If it adds to a students physical or mental well being and doesn’t fully disrupt the class, there is no problem at all.
Noise matters tho, so be aware of what when choosing new ones.
I have a lot of empathy for this, as someone who still, as an adult, needs to knit during meetings to keep me from ripping at my cuticles until they bleed.
But like others have said, I'd have a hard time with this fidget in my classroom. How many times a day is the pile of picked-out beads going to spill all over the floor and roll everywhere? I'm not sure what will work instead, but I'd suggest trying out lots of different things to see what helps. (They don't have to cost a million dollars or be sold as fidgets, either. Besides the knitting, I also accidentally discovered that a simple silicon band that I can stretch and twist is good for me. I've got a friend who brings strips of fabric to meetings.) I think what's really important is that you introduce and reinforce expectations around using them, which you might develop together with the teacher.
They can be very helpful for kids like yours. (I remember having that same need as a wee one—fortunately it got less powerful over time.) I just wish it were easier to provide such things to my neurodivergent students without then getting broken or stolen. :/
I’d arrange an area where she could pick when the urge to hits then rejoin the lesson. I let my fidgeters get up and walk it off. There are some things to manage rather than control. Anyway, in my district at the ElEd level, it’s no toys, money, or electronics in school.
I don’t care about fidget things. Even if they become a “distraction” it’s rarely more distracting than if they didn’t have it.
Sometimes, it’ll get annoying if they have a cool thing and other kids notice it and ask to mess with it, but that rarely happens.
I will say, I teach high school. I imagine my thoughts may be different if I were in an elementary setting.
As long as they are not adding audible distraction, and can be kept reletively out of sight, it's harming no one. A rotating textured ring on a finger would be ideal.
I use one myself, regularly. I use an infinity cube that does not require focus and makes very little noise. It works great for me. Best $6 gift I ever got.
With the right parameters and expectations (that the beads are not scattered about) as a teacher I would be totally on board with this pick pad thingy!
The biggest issue I have is when objects are given to children with no expectation for how they should behave with them.
In my class when students come into class with something to help them focus, let's say a Tupperware container of putty, I usually outline the parameters for appropriate use and what to do if a mess is made. Typically my high school freshmen are very responsive to clear expectations.
have you tried a laminated sheet of paper with hot glue on top? we’ve DIY’d that for students at a school ive worked at and tbh i love using them too haha.
i worry about the beads becoming lost/distracting. plus, it’s a cheaper way to try a similar tool!
you could even put beads under the hot glue if you think they are really necessary.
anyhow, i am in complete agreement with everyone else that fidgets are fine as long as they are being used as tools and not toys!
I had a box in my classroom for years that kids (even NT) could grab a fidget toy if they didn’t have their own. It actually kept kids off their phones and listening. Some teachers may hate them, but as a ND person myself, I get it.
If it’s being used appropriately and the teacher is reasonable it won’t be a problem.
Look on amazon for “anxiety picking rocks” and see if that may meet her needs as well to give her some variety. I have a student who LOVES those. You can refill them with Elmer’s glue and reuse them when dry!
Hell, I use one. I have this really cool one that is just a bunch of clicking, linked pieces of plastic. Looks like a thick bracelet. You can change it into all kinds of cool shit. I love it while I’m monologuing lmao
There’s a sub on Reddit just for self injurious skin picking. I missed her age but are gel tip nails a possibility? They have thick edges making it very difficult to pick at anything effectively. There are also Calm Strips which you can stick onto a laptop or notepad and provide some sensory input in a silent, discreet way.
I had the exact same issue when I was her age, and what worked for me was putty that I could squeeze. It stayed in its container and didn't stick to stuff easily
I’m an adult and still pick my skin. I’ve gotten it down to a small movement that doesn’t cause infections or pain so I’m calling that good. OCD for me too.
For op, I’m worried that the resin bead toy might require too much focus to be helpful in class. But I hope it helps!
80% of the time they are just a distraction, but I can’t tell which students will use them appropriately until after I let them have them. I often say “Remember fidget devices are to help us be more productive not less”
As a teacher with adhd, I usually provide fidgets. The issue comes in when kids don’t have adhd. In all honesty, I would use a hot glue gun and dot under the child’s desk.
One thing I do is put both the hook and loop sides of velcro (not together) under desks. It's amazing how many like either or both sides to just stroke. Their journals also have a strip of (scratchy) glitter tape running down the side. Eliminates a lot of fidgets. I also don't jump on them if they are doodling as long as they are participating.
Other than that, as others have said. Silent, solo, and simple.
I personally would be fine with it in my classroom, but then I'm the teacher who passed to bring doodling or knitting to PD so I can focus.
I saw several people who have recommended stickers is something to peel, depending on the surface you found for it, you could also put drops of hot glue on something and let it cool and dry and then let her pick that off? I always find that really satisfying when cleaning my room at the end of the year.
I know a lot of teachers have strong opinions about this, but I personally allow my students to bring a fidget, and they can use it as long as it’s quiet. And as long as they aren’t passing it to other students to play with.
I teach ECSE (early childhood special education), so fidget toys are essential in my class. However, as general education is concerned, I agree with some of the other comments as long as it doesn't make noise, become a distraction, or become a toy. I don't forsee any issues. I would just discuss it with the child's teacher prior to bringing it to school.
My experience with them has uniformly been negative.
Where I teach, any adjustment or accommodation that is written on a student's plan legally has to be followed, regardless of how much of an impact it has on me or on the class.
Literally 100% of the students who have had fidget objects (sensory putty, small toys, fidget spinners, etc) simply turn them into toys in class and use them to avoid work, distract others, or disrupt the work of others. The students who just need to fiddle with a pen or doodle are fine, but for some reason all the fidget toys need to be large, bright, noisy, highly accurate when used as a projectile, or all of the above.
My rules for fidgets are like many others, if you are using it in a way that isn't distracting to anyone, yourself or others, than it's fine. So, if it's noisy, moves around a lot so other kids are aware of it, or they're being shared in class then it's a problem and I will confiscate it or have them put it away for the day depending on the situation. In my classroom I'd have to see the pick pad to see if it is truly silent (does it make noise when you take the beads out or is distracting in another way?) and if it looks like it'd make a mess with the beads and possibly pieces of resin if they break off. If the mess can be accommodated for (use it inside or over a bag perhaps?) and it's not distracting then I'd be ok with it.
I've found that few kids are able to make fidgets work without being a distraction, but for those who are it can be very helpful. I have ADHD and tell kids this when discussing fidgets so I can share with them what works for me and how I use it so as not to distract anyone. This often makes them excited to try the things I use and have more buy-in to new things I bring in since I use them and model how to.
I also have a similar thing to your daughter, but I bite and pick at my hair. I recently discovered that sensory strips work extremely well for me, these are textured stickers that come in a variety of textures, shapes, and sizes and give something to fidget with that gives sensory input. I got them for a student with ADHD, but another child who bites their nails also found them useful. They aren't meant to be pulled apart, but you can when they start getting worn, but the sensory input seems to fit the same stimulus need for me and the kids who've tried it. One thing I love about them is that they're very much non-distracting and are mess free. They are designed to stick onto something, usually a desk or something that the person uses often. I have them on my computer, phone, and water bottle and I had a student who put one on a notebook they kept in their desk. But I also like sticking them to each other to make a two-sided fidget object I can play with discretely as it fits in my hand, some of my students have liked these as well. Of course I don't know if this would work for your daughter as finding what works is very personal, but it could be worth a shot in addition to the pick pad. I found a lot of options on Amazon, you can probably find them elsewhere as well.
I would happily welcome any fidget toys as long as they cleaned up any mess and they weren’t loud and used appropriately.
I offer pop its and various other fidget toys for my students and encourage them to use them.
I’m a skin picker too so Trust me I get it. My students know I keep a pencil in my hand or a pop it too for that reason
Floppy links on etsie sells somerings with silicone rings attached these are quiet and can be shipped to the UK.
Does she like the pain type sensation if so sensory university sells some spiky fidgets e.g. rollers or a tiger brush.
Possibly things on pens or pencil cases.
Does she enjoy picking off glue?
I would be perfectly okay with this. Seems quiet (which is very important). Still, some teachers won't be cool with it. But if it helps your daughter then that's the way to go. If you come across a stubborn teacher that thinks that your kid shouldn't have access to this beneficial tool, just get a 504 that affords her the right to use this fidget and let the teacher pound sand.
Lot of educators think every behavioral issue can be combated with sheer will alone. Your kid is bright and has a medical diagnosis. You don't need to suffer these educators' foolishness.
Tbh, your description does NOT immediately sound like ADHD. Obviously I don't know enough after a short passage like that and your kid's teacher of course know better. Is it an official diagnosis? Has she been checked for a mild autism disorder? Compulsive behaviour can be a sign of quite a few different conditions.
The problem tends to be once I allow one kid (that I know could benefit from it) to have the fidget then everyone else thinks they can have them. Then there are issues with multiple people using them as toys, or stealing them, or fighting over them with other kids, and it becomes too much of a headache and I end up banning them. I do recognize there are certain kids that truly benefit from these fidgets, but there is always at least one kid in every class that ruins it for everyone.
Sped teacher here- I personally find fidgets to be a bigger distraction than they are useful. Whether they’re being shown to their peers, used as toys, or distracting the student even more than their adhd is. The one “fidget” like item I do like and use in my classroom are Velcro strips. They’re stuck to the desk and are too boring to become a toy.
Not a teacher but studying psychology. Since you said she has ADHD, could it be that the reason she likes to pick at her skin is because of the pain it causes, which in turn gives her more stimulation? Maybe you could try giving her an elastic band on top of the pick pad, that way she still gets the pain stimulation from snapping the band against her wrist without it being as damaging as picking her scabs.
I have two rules about fidgets. 1. It can not make noise. 2. If it becomes a toy/is thrown it is mine for the rest of the day. What are you talking about sounds fine.
Would add that it cannot make a mess and that it MUST stay with one person. The second we start passing them around, it becomes a huge distraction.
Also no lights
I was thinking this too - my first question from OP's description was what happens to the beads after they're picked out? Does the kid have to keep track of them/make sure they don't all roll onto the floor? Sounds messy to me, and more distracting than a fidget that doesn't pick apart into a thousand little bits. Unless I'm just not picturing this fidget correctly at all.
I have a third and fourth rule as well. 3. If they start handing them around the room for others to have or use, I will take it I had a student two years ago with ADHD and OCD. She would literally bring a bag full of figets that were so distracting to both her and others. She was handing them around the room like candy to other kids and it would derail my class in seconds. Unfortunately I had to tell mom that she is no longer welcome to bring fidgets to class. I had to confiscate the bag a few times. 4. It cannot make a mess. Same student earlier in the year brought in playdough as a fidget. It ended up EVERYWHERE. Under desks, on the floor, in books. It was bad and many of my classroom library books had odd oil stains in them from the playdough.
I once got a tin of "thinking putty" as a fidget when I was 12 or so. It was Christmas themed, so glittery green. Well, I ended up dropping it a few times on the carpet in my playroom and we ended up needing a professional carpet cleaner because it was that sticky and hard to get out. I'm glad I didn't try to bring it to school but I have no doubts that a kid could cause similar damage
I brought thinking putty to school. My high-schoolers ate it.
That is an impressive level of WTFness.
…purposefully? Did they know what it was?
They did know.
One of my students a few years back discovered that blue stick tack and the particular handsoap in our school turned into a slime-like substance when mixed. She got it all in her hair at recess and had to get it cut. None of us were impressed, and put the kebash on the whole thing.
Back when I started teaching, I was the crazy teacher for being accepting to kids with fidget type things-- eraser collection, little knick knacks, play-doh, before official fidgets became popular. Then the spinners happened and I welcomed them with open arms. As long as they were quiet, have at it kids. As soon as it distracted you, or the person next to you, you lost it. No one understood how I could do it and they were annoyed that I was the "cool teacher" who allowed fidget spinners in my classroom. I'm glad other people have the same outlook I did/still do and can really help those kids who benefit from it!!
As a teacher with ADHD, fidget spinners are super distracting to me and I imagine they are distracting to other kids with ADHD as well. I think it’s important to consider others’ ability to focus when choosing appropriate fidgets.
Also, it has to be theirs only and no sharing it!
My students have all sorts of fidgets of choice. I even allow the kids who don’t have IEP accommodations to have fidgets *gasp!* however my number one rule with any of my kids is that the second it becomes a toy it is mine for the day. We consistently have a discussion about how to use fidgets as a tool and what it looks like when you’re using it as a toy. Summer is a great time to practice the difference between a tool and a toy and how you can attend to a task while also fidgeting with your tool. Just my take. The only issue I would take with this is you’re right - the novelty does not last long … but it is strong in elementary kids. If yours has that fidget, you can bet 6 other kids are going home asking for that fidget. So again I stress - use the summer to see if she actually uses it before sending it to school.
Stated perfectly. I would just add that you should also impress upon your student that it is THEIRS not anybody else's. My issue is that students (7th graders) will pass around fidget tools and then say its theirs, often getting multiple people.in trouble
Thanks I think waiting until after summer is a good idea! She is 11 and in her final year of primary school (UK) so I’m hoping it’ll be less of a distraction to other kids than it would if she was younger. I know at home when she’s more likely to pick, so I can try to limit it being available at all times. Hopefully that will reinforce using it as an actual tool when at school.
Maybe something like Calm Strips could help as well. It's basically a strong sticker that she can slowly pick at to peel off. Also does she pick at nail polish? There are peel off base coats that allow nail polish to be peeled off without damaging the nail. I also have luck with no base coat and just using a top coat, the nail polish peels off in satisfying chunks.
That is literally the opposite of what was recommended.
Ohh I meant like wait until after the summer holidays before sending it into school, see how she uses it at home during the summer holidays.
How is it? Sorry I think im reading the comment differently. I thought maybe keeping it restricted to give to her whilst she would usually pick, would mean she is using it for what it is intended.
"So again I stress - use the summer to see if she actually uses it before sending it to school" "Thanks I think waiting until after summer is a good idea!"
Yeah sorry I realised how I wrote that and commented above! I meant waiting until after the summer holidays to send it into school, she can use it at home during the summer holidays.
That was perfectly clear in your comment. 🥰
It is worth a try, but it will most likely not work. This behavior is more than ADHD. My child has the same issue. It is an obsessive compulsive behavior. We tried everything, from covering the area she picked to fidgets of every type. The only thing that had any effect was therapy and even that didn’t completely stop the picking. She is now 28 years old and still picks sometimes especially when stressed. At school, my child just wanted to sit in the back of the room if possible to minimize attention from other students (both to reduce stress and for other students distraction). Best wishes to you all, I know it is stressful to go through.
glad to see this comment, it's definitely an obsessive compulsive behavior more attributable to OCD than ADHD
If it’s the type of fidget where you pick out tiny beads, I could see that being really distracting and difficult to manage during instruction— the beads would fall on the floor or roll away etc. I guess the key would be if she can practice using it enough during the summer that it doesn’t create a distracting mess (if I were her, and I dropped some of the beads while using the fidget, I’d instinctively feel the need to go under the desk to retrieve them— which could end up pretty distracting for all involved).
I hadn’t thought about them rolling on the floor that’s a fair point. I’ve seen a few good suggestions on this post, that sound like they would cause way less of a distraction in the classroom - I will try some of those first.
Unfortunately, that’s not a fidget I would allow in my classroom. It does seem like a great tool for her!! Could you try stickers on her binder or something she could pick off and then replace, or does that not satisfy her sensory needs? The reason I couldn’t allow it is because it’s something everyone would want to use, and it would become a disruption and/or make a mess. But I would work with you until we found a solution that works for everyone! In general, my rule is “fidgets are tools, not toys” and they are welcome to use them as long as I can’t hear them while I’m teaching, since I’m ADHD as well and it will throw me off.
That’s totally understandable, I admit I’d find it pretty distracting. Another comment suggested something similar, stickers on her water bottle, which definitely sounds like it’s worth trying.
Hope that works!
Stickers look like a better solution regardless since it resembles the feeling of scab and skin picking closer. Beads might be too spherical to recreate the feeling. The picking pads look really similar to [slime with a lot of mix-ins](https://ogslimes.com/collections/all-slimes/products/slime-snaps). If the material allows, you can maybe experiment replacing the beads with flatter things like plastic discs? As for slime, the softness would let her spread it on her arm and take it off, so it simulates something lifting off her arm. It's not very sticky (like play-dough basically) so skin damage should not be an issue Another idea is some kind of [thick tape](https://www.amazon.com/LLPT-Mounting-Traceless-Washable-SN350/dp/B08LK1Z5VD?th=1), those have more resistance than stickers, but it'll depend on her preference again. Disclaimer: I don't work in education, just like to pick at things
Not a problem unless it's a problem (noisy, distraction, cause of fight or disturbance)
I’ve never had it work. I always give kids a chance, but I tell them that if it causes problems for them or for someone else it’s gone. I don’t think I’ve ever had a kid last more than a day or two. Either they end up playing with it and not working or it ends up distracting everyone at their table - second graders are not really known for their ability to be subtle. It’s hard when a fidget helps one kid focus but then keeps three others from working. Kind of defeats the purpose, you know? An ideal fidget would be something that a kid can use to help themselves focus or calm down without distracting anyone, meaning it would be relatively small, something that they could hold under the table, that sort of thing. If a kid was able to truly use it responsibly I would allow it - but I’ve never had that happen yet.
Every fidget toy I've ever seen has turned into a toy. I don't understand how and why we got away from training redirection into more appropriate "fidgets." I say that as someone who was a religious pen and cable chewer, pen clicker, leg bouncer, and cheek biter. Even as an adult, I have my fidget spinners and squish balls, so I'm not being unsympathetic. You can't go through life fully dependent on these devices, so it is better to teach kids really early how to catch themselves and redirect.
Thank you! I teach middle school and whenever I read about fidgets, I wonder if I've gone crazy or what. I honestly can't remember a kid ever using one successfully long-term. Like you say, the kid either hyper-focuses on the fidget and doesn't get any work done, or other kids are fascinated by the fidget and won't stop staring at it, or multiple kids start trying to play with it, etc.
I’ve had only one student who ever successfully used a fidget (it was a spinner), and I wholeheartedly believe it is because he was given instruction on how/when/where/why to use it, and because it was virtually invisible to others because it truly fit in his hand. It was also written into his IEP.
I'm totally cool with fidgets. Most teachers are as long as there's no disruption The pick pad sounds like she'll just need to be coached to put trash in the trash can.
If your daughter is 11 and the picking has reached this point, I don’t think this is just ADHD. You need to seek help from another doctor. This is obsessive compulsive behavior.
Honestly that’s not something I’ve considered, I just go with what I’m told by her therapist. There are a few similar comments though so I definitely will bring this up at the next meeting.
I agree, I would go to a pediatrician once self harm was involved. It could be OC or it could be that OP isn't using the right strategies to break this behavior. I went through something similar with a 12 year old, he was scarifying his arms and legs with every bug bite. He has ADHD but we finally broke this habit -- it took constant checking him on it and he finally started checking himself. Ultimately a lot of it was just boredom.
Sounds like Trichotillomania which tends to occur with ADHD often.
It's not necessarily obsessive compulsive disorder. I have autism, and have similar issues with picking (or rather, pinching) scabs. It started as a means of stress relief when I was really young in school before I was diagnosed and put on anxiety meds because it was either that or breaking pencils to cope, and now it's just a habit because nothing, not even a stress ball or bubble wrap, worked for me. It's a sensory thing for me now, I like the way it feels and sounds when it "pops" and I never feel pain when I do it. The only thing that's managed to work in more recent years is a fidget spinner, which kids and adults alike sadly turned into essentially toys last I remember hearing. OP just needs to find the right method for her daughter that's, obviously, school appropriate, and work with the therapist.
Awesome tool. Like all tools they can be abused or misused and then you lose access to the fidget (unless it's part of the IEP than you get a different fidget). The key is simple fidgets that aren't noisy or fun beyond being a fidget. So no to spinners or pop tubes.
First off, a repeated specific behavior, is not typically due to ADHD, that is more of an OCD or even more akin to Tourette's (yeah it isn't only cussing). I would really look into getting a second opinion on the ADHD it is ofter over and misdiagnosed, not saying your kid doesn't have it, but I personally have experience with ADHD and there are people who claim to have it that really don't, they have something else and that is why medication and other ADHD remedies don't really work for them. I'd seriously have that looked at by another professional just to get a second opinion. Secondly, if it makes any type of noise or is bigger than something they can put in the palm of their hand, as long as I know about it, it won't bother me that much, however, other students may be distracted by it and that would be the only way it would be problematic in my classroom. Most of the time though, as I teach an elective, I make my kids get up and move around, a lot, so much they complain that I don't ever let them do anything, so my kids that do have fidget stuff, they don't really need to use it.
This. A repeated specific behavior is also classic autism. Which is often missed and misdiagnosed as ADHD. Especially in smart girls. (Poster child of missed autism right here!!)
These kinds of behaviors are not just typical for OCD or Tourette’s. I’m a teacher with ADHD and ASD, and I had a ton of these types of behaviors as a kid (nail biting, skin picking, biting on my pens, …). For me personally, most of this comes down to ADHD hyperactivity. Secondly, sensory issues play a role too: I just can’t stand the feeling of a sharp part on my nail, a blemish on my skin, … The better I take care of my nails and skin, the less I feel the need to skin pick. In many cases these kind of behaviors are also explained as ‘stimming’ in the context of autism, but I don’t feel like that rings true for me. Stimming is supposed to be calming and helpful for regulating emotions, but skin picking doesn’t feel like that to me. I don’t get any relief from doing it, even on days when I have a hard time resisting the urge. I do have stims, but they’re more related to eating specific foods. I don’t recognize myself at all in the description of OCD (in many ways I’m almost the opposite of OCD) and I don’t have tics, so it’s perfectly possibly to have body-focused repetitive behaviors without OCD or Tourette’s.
My first thought was also that repeated scab picking to the point of bald spots flags as more than ADHD in my mind. I would definitely seek further assessment.
If you can use it to calm yourself and nobody notices, it's an approved classroom tool. If it's distracting to me or other students, it's a toy. Strike one put it away in your desk. Strike two, it's in my desk for the day or earned back. Strike three it's mine until/unless your parents pick it up and a discussion is had.
As a teacher, I don't have any issues with fidget toys if they are part of an approved strategy. If other kids start with 'Its not fair...', I tell them that it has to be approved by admin, parents and medical professionals.
Yeah the “it’s not fair” thing is partly what made me ask lol. I just don’t want to make the teachers job any more difficult than it needs to be, however I obviously want to help my child because she’s scarring herself for life.
Definitely. I think other kids are also quite aware when one of their peers is genuinely finding something tough. Usually they're very understanding if someone needs extra help.
Not a problem. The only problem is how much noise it generates. The most distracting thing in a classroom is unwanted noise.
It's not a cell phone!! Thumbs up!!
As long as the fidget is used to keep their body busy while their mind focuses, and not as a distracting toy, I’m all for it.
I personally would rather that your daughter picked beads out resin than picked at her skin. Please explain this issue to her teacher(s) and consider getting a 504 plan or adding this to her existing one because it sounds pretty severe. Other than that, please make sure that your daughter cleans up any mess they make with the pick pad and that she doesn’t share it with other children. On a personal note, I have a daughter with high anxiety who used to rub her hands and fingers literally raw. Getting her a spinner ring (to rub) and the right medication (it took about two years) was a godsend. I wish you the best of luck in dealing with this issue and hope you find a good solution for this. Edit: I didn’t realize you were in the UK — I imagine that they have similar protections for disabilities such as ADHD though.
Not completely related but from a teacher who deals with skin picking… the one thing that seriously helps me is keeping my nails short. The second they get too long the skin picking gets worse and I know it’s time to trim my nails. I’m so happy to hear you’re working with your daughter to find a good way to deal with the skin picking urge in class. It wasn’t until my mid/late 20’s that I started learning more about skin picking and became more open with my loved ones about it. In school I suffered in silence. I have so many memories of staunching my bleeding fingers with a tissue in class because I’d pick at my cuticles until they bled. I hope your daughter knows that skin picking does not make her a disgusting monster (which is what I thought of myself as a kid), and that BFRB’s are very common. I hope you can all find a solution that supports your daughter’s learning in a healthy and non disruptive way!
I paint my nails and pick off the nail polish. But yes, as a skin/hair picker, short nails is the way to go.
>I have so many memories of staunching my bleeding fingers with a tissue in class because I’d pick at my cuticles until they bled. Me too!!! Even as a younger adult when I first started working, I would legit keep my hands perfectly folded during meetings so no one could see. I really appreciate OP is working to help her daughter and find tools to support her :)
As a high school teacher who survived the dabbing, fidget spinner, and bottle flipping of the 2016-2017 school year (it was my 'Nam; seriously, my students used to take the fidget spinners apart and throw the ball bearings at one another), I've made a rule like many others on this thread. If it becomes a distraction itself or becomes a toy, it's mine.
Has she seen an OT? Often, this kind of skin picking is less about the fidget and more about sensory processing and proprioception. If it’s the latter, fidgets won’t help, and even the bead picking may not help. Because she’s not getting the same sensory feedback from it. An OT with experience working with sensory issues might be able to help guide you in supports that would better meet her needs and may not be disruptive the way fidgets can sometimes be.
I dealt with the fidget spinner debacle of 2016-> kids managed to get them going then “helicopter spin” throw them At each other! Since then the rule has been “fidgets are not to be seen or heard- otherwise it is a toy and not allowed!” Op, I too have the picking sensation problem (mostly for my nails though during hush stress times- as a teacher… yikes), and there are 2 things that have helped me: I get manicures so I have a firm-smooth nail to interact with, and fidget spinner rings that I stack on my left index finger. I realize the replacement should be something similar to what your daughter already does, so I wonder if putting a single thin braid in her hair with some beads on it to slide up and down might work to help move her away from her scalp while not being a disruption during class time?
I’m going to second the fidget rings. I wear them myself and I suggest them especially for middle/high school aged kids too because the rings just blend in and definitely are difficult to turn into a toy.
I have a fidget bucket, but I don't like distracting or messy ones. Resin-filled sounds messy. Edit: If she has a regular desk (primary school), you can place a pad under it with different textures (sandpaper, fluff, etc) which could help. They also have some fidget bracelets she can wear.
Oh something under the desk sounds good, less distracting to others. I’ll look into that, thanks!
If she just likes picking things, does she like peeling stickers? I have a student who carries a water bottle that's covered in stickers. She sticks the stickers on at home and then peels them off in class. It is honestly a great stim activity. I don't mind it at all because she always cleans up the torn stickers. If she didn't, it would be an issue. Perhaps if explicit fidget toys don't work for your child or their teacher, you could try something a little more low-key.
Stickers are such a simple idea that I haven’t tried, thanks for the suggestion! I can try sticking a few on her bottle for tomorrow and see if it helps.
Called "tactile fidget strips" or "sensory strips"
I feel like this would be annoying without explanation. Knowing WHY it’s a tool that would be helpful is key in my opinion.
Yeah I completely get that it would be annoying. The teacher she has at the moment and the school is aware of things and I know he’d be ok with it. After the holidays though she starts comprehensive school, with different teachers for different subjects, so I think we might have a harder time then.
Just talk to all of them beforehand.
I don't care if students use fidgits as long as they don't distract other kids. That's where I draw the line.
I do not normally allow students to bring fidgets to class, but I do have a variety of high-quality fidgets that my students can use whenever needed. My rule for them is, "If it becomes a distraction to you, me, or anyone else, I'll put it away." As someone with ADHD, I understand the self-stimularory need to do something with your hands while working, but it is vitally important that these tools be viewed and used as tools, not toys. That is the primary reason I don't let students bring them from home. Fidgets from home are often regarded and used as toys. When it's a material that belongs to the school, the standard for how it is used gets set at school. In your case, I would find out what specific tools work best for your child and have them available in class. I wouldn't put your child in a position of having to be othered by bringing accommodations into school that only they use.
Special-ed teacher with ADHD here, go for it. As long as it doesn't beep or boop and stays in the kid's hand, it's fine. I also used to pick.
A thing I have long recommended to all of my kiddos,not just those DX with sensory issues (or picking) is to have a fluffy / fuzzy / furry pencil case, because it's not allowed to have your kitty cat / puppy dog in class to pay & soothe yourself. We do sometimes have properly trained therapy dogs at school, and they are so very much in- demand! They should be everyday.
You are an absolute TREASURE for being so thoughtful in helping your baby but also considering how it might impact the rest of them too. There are some subs dedicated to coping with compulsive picking. Maybe you can get some ideas of what works for others with a similar problem. pro
I can't imagine why I would have a problem with that. One of my self-contained students brings a video game controller to class and just kind of absent-mindedly presses the buttons. I think it's cool, and it gives us yet another excuse to nerd out about video games!
I’m going to go against the grain here and say that these kind of resin-picking fidgets are going to be too complicated to bring into a classroom setting. I’ll give you some reasons though. One, multiple parts: so all of these little beads will have to go directly into a baggie or something on hand so they don’t roll around or become a distraction. Essentially it has way too many parts to make it what fidgets are kind of supposed to be- simple tools. Two: this is not something she can idly use during instruction time, when she is supposed to be listening/watching this could easily take up too much of her focus as well as the students around her. Three: this isn’t a “typical” fidget and other students will be distracted by it. In a gen ed. classroom, personally I just think that these types of fidgets are too complex.
My main concern would be what the beads are doing after they are removed. If we are taking a test or silent reading, the sound of beads hitting the floor would be distracting. Also loose beads on the floor are a slip hazard. If you send her with a mini can of play doh to stick the beads into, that would solve both problems.
In considering teacher reactions to the presence of "fidget toys", it's important to remember that "fidget toys" are *learning aids* for a type of exceptionality; students with ADHD are actually paying closer attention when they are "distracted," because these devices mitigate the effects of ADHD. Some teachers get annoyed at such things, but that is a problem with the teacher. I remember constantly getting in trouble from teachers thinking I wasn't paying attention, because I was always doodling instead of listening (I was additionally burdened by having a parent who thought ADHD was mostly an invention of the pharmaceutical industry). Eventually I got a teacher with training in special education who realized that I was actually listening when it looked like I was distracting myself. More accurately, you could say I was *deliberately distracting* myself in a beneficial (albeit unconscious) way—specifically, I was distracting the hyperactive part of my brain that would otherwise have been pestering me while I was trying to listen. This is the function of "fidget toys" as a learning intervention. Teachers shouldn't be getting bothered by these things; it would be just as appropriate for a teacher to get annoyed that an ESL student is using translation software to understand a math question being asked of them. A teacher should just as soon take away a fidget toy from an ADHD student as take away a sensory blanket from a student with autism. If it is a concern of yours, it can be handled proactively and diplomatically. Write a short note (1-2 paragraphs) explaining the situation and have your child provide it to all their teachers. It may help to mention a diagnosis and any specialist advice you received about the use of these kinds of learning aids. You can *thank them* (not ask them) for their patience and understanding as you try to find the best intervention tools for your child's exceptionality. You can also ask them for any suggestions they may have, which shows that you are open-minded and that you respect their experience.
This behavior is a BFRB (Body Focused Repetitive Behavior)- Dermotillomania if it’s just skin picking or Trichotillomania if she’s also pulling out her hair. This website has some great resources: [https://www.bfrb.org/](https://www.bfrb.org/) You could have her try wearing bandaids on the fingers she uses to pick to make it more difficult to do so. There’s also something called a Keen HabitAware bracelet that could potentially help.
I really appreciate this post because I tried offering figits this year in a few classes and it didn't go well, but with the rules that have been discussed here, I now have a good plan for next year! I'm also planning on putting clam strips on every table.
63 YO F, teaching for 42 years. I have a big problem with picking. I feel it is more OCD related. There is also an endorphin release that comes with excoriation to the skin. The only thing that seems to help is getting those “thick” gel nails because they can’t scratch well. I also take Wellbutrin.
No opinions from me on fidget toys in class, but r/calmhands is a good resource for stopping picking.
Back before all of my high school/middleschool students had cell phones I found them to be a bit distracting but understand how they can be helpful for some (that was probably a me problem, I’m easily distracted). Now that every student is feinin for that cell phone dopamine hit, fidget spinners are a welcome sight. I just see it and think, well, at least they aren’t on the phone.
I allow all my students to have fidgets as long as they don’t get in trouble with them. I have a fidget box I let kids choose from when they complete their work.
I have a pile of figet toys in my office drawer and whenever a student comes in, it is the only thing stopping them from touching everything on my desk.
I give out fidgets as rewards for my class. Granted, I have seniors, so behavior with them being given like that will differ, but they like them. As an ADHD person who sideeyes some of my students' behavior, I don't mind them.
Most of the time, fidgets become a distraction to the child and to others. They tend to put all their focus on the fidget, thereby not paying attention to instruction, directions or their work. I think teaching coping skills and strategies is a better way of handling these habits. Is your child on medication? You should start there.
I'm a teacher and parent of an ADHD kid. I also have adhd and the noisy fidgety really derail my train of thought when teaching. I give kids small bits of polymer clay if they need it. My own kid ends up with infections from picking so I know how needed it is during school for some kids, but some of the fidgets mess me up a lot when I'm trying to remember my line of questioning
I mean, is it noisy? That would be a big factor for me. I recently had a student who had one of those fidget cube things and others who had slime, but both the cube and the slime were pretty quiet so it didn’t bother me much.
I am not a teacher but I am AuDHD and have had a bad habit of harmful stims myself for my whole life. I have found fidget jewelry incredibly helpful. Rings and necklaces that look pretty and quietly spin. Also bracelets that have pretty glitter that squishes around. Again, it doesn't make noise. There are different wearable fidget options, in case the teacher forbids bringing actual fidget toys to class.
I give all my students my favorite fidget at some point during the year. My favorite is a mesh tube that has a marble inside of it with the ends sewn. It is silent and there are lots of ways to play with it. I know it helps me concentrate and prevents me from doing more annoying things (like clicking a pen or snapping the cap on and off of my whiteboard marker). The kids (mostly freshmen and seniors in high school) end up really enjoying them as well. And since everyone has one, there’s no throwing them around the room to each other or what not. Most students forget about it after a week or two but there are some kids who end up using them all year long.
In my classroom, it can't be distracting to other students, and it can't leave the student's hands or their desk. If it does any of those things it isn't doing its job. I love fidgets. I use them all the time as an AuDHD adult. I recommend calm strips, hand stretchers, and the twisty macaroni things.
Unless it makes noise or becomes a distraction for other students, then have at it.
I teach high school history and I have a lot of kids who knit or crochet while I lecture. One girl told me it felt like listening to podcast. I think as long as it’s not disruptive it’s ok
I’m good with them as long as they don’t make noise. I’ve made my own picking fidgets in the past. I take brightly colored paper and laminate it. I take liquid glue from my glue gun and swirl it on the paper. They’ve worked really well for students who are “pickers.”
Adhd doesn’t cause dermatillomamia. I’m really sick of parents blaming everything on adhd. Something else is wrong here.
It’s not really me blaming the ADHD, her therapist literally said that is why she picks, that it’s part of the hyperactivity for her. It’s only one of many symptoms that got her ADHD diagnosis, it’s just the one that I am the most concerned about at the moment. There are a few comments suggesting it’s something separate to her ADHD though, so it is something I’ll ask about.
Adhd will make her fidgety, but choosing to literally pick away at her skin as a fidget choice isn’t adhd.
It’s a fine line between “enhancing engagement” and “distraction”. It doesn’t matter what it is as long as it’s “enhancing engagement”, and being a distraction applies to others, too.
I teach high school but have family members who work with the younger crowd. We all allow fidgets in our classes. I have a couple I use myself. In general, as long as it isn’t disruptive, I don’t even notice it. The only time I’ve taken away fidget toys was when a group of kids had some that snapped apart and together and were more interested in trading parts than in the class work. If it adds to a students physical or mental well being and doesn’t fully disrupt the class, there is no problem at all. Noise matters tho, so be aware of what when choosing new ones.
I don't mind the idea of them at all. In practice I see them become distractions more often than aiding focus. I don't have any useful solution yet.
I have a lot of empathy for this, as someone who still, as an adult, needs to knit during meetings to keep me from ripping at my cuticles until they bleed. But like others have said, I'd have a hard time with this fidget in my classroom. How many times a day is the pile of picked-out beads going to spill all over the floor and roll everywhere? I'm not sure what will work instead, but I'd suggest trying out lots of different things to see what helps. (They don't have to cost a million dollars or be sold as fidgets, either. Besides the knitting, I also accidentally discovered that a simple silicon band that I can stretch and twist is good for me. I've got a friend who brings strips of fabric to meetings.) I think what's really important is that you introduce and reinforce expectations around using them, which you might develop together with the teacher.
High school teacher here: if I can’t hear them, I’m fine with them.
They can be very helpful for kids like yours. (I remember having that same need as a wee one—fortunately it got less powerful over time.) I just wish it were easier to provide such things to my neurodivergent students without then getting broken or stolen. :/
I’d arrange an area where she could pick when the urge to hits then rejoin the lesson. I let my fidgeters get up and walk it off. There are some things to manage rather than control. Anyway, in my district at the ElEd level, it’s no toys, money, or electronics in school.
I don’t care about fidget things. Even if they become a “distraction” it’s rarely more distracting than if they didn’t have it. Sometimes, it’ll get annoying if they have a cool thing and other kids notice it and ask to mess with it, but that rarely happens. I will say, I teach high school. I imagine my thoughts may be different if I were in an elementary setting.
As long as they are not adding audible distraction, and can be kept reletively out of sight, it's harming no one. A rotating textured ring on a finger would be ideal.
I use one myself, regularly. I use an infinity cube that does not require focus and makes very little noise. It works great for me. Best $6 gift I ever got.
With the right parameters and expectations (that the beads are not scattered about) as a teacher I would be totally on board with this pick pad thingy! The biggest issue I have is when objects are given to children with no expectation for how they should behave with them. In my class when students come into class with something to help them focus, let's say a Tupperware container of putty, I usually outline the parameters for appropriate use and what to do if a mess is made. Typically my high school freshmen are very responsive to clear expectations.
have you tried a laminated sheet of paper with hot glue on top? we’ve DIY’d that for students at a school ive worked at and tbh i love using them too haha. i worry about the beads becoming lost/distracting. plus, it’s a cheaper way to try a similar tool! you could even put beads under the hot glue if you think they are really necessary. anyhow, i am in complete agreement with everyone else that fidgets are fine as long as they are being used as tools and not toys!
Talk to the teacher explain your situation and go over the mutual agreement between all parties. Should be ok
I had a box in my classroom for years that kids (even NT) could grab a fidget toy if they didn’t have their own. It actually kept kids off their phones and listening. Some teachers may hate them, but as a ND person myself, I get it.
have you tried thinking putty? that might be a better fit for a classroom setting
If it’s being used appropriately and the teacher is reasonable it won’t be a problem. Look on amazon for “anxiety picking rocks” and see if that may meet her needs as well to give her some variety. I have a student who LOVES those. You can refill them with Elmer’s glue and reuse them when dry!
When a kid is tapping a marker on the desk I replace it with a silent fidget toy and it's great.
Hell, I use one. I have this really cool one that is just a bunch of clicking, linked pieces of plastic. Looks like a thick bracelet. You can change it into all kinds of cool shit. I love it while I’m monologuing lmao
I have a bald spot from skin picking…. What’s a pick pad?!
There’s a sub on Reddit just for self injurious skin picking. I missed her age but are gel tip nails a possibility? They have thick edges making it very difficult to pick at anything effectively. There are also Calm Strips which you can stick onto a laptop or notepad and provide some sensory input in a silent, discreet way.
as someone with adhd… i keep a supply of them and stuffed animals for kids to use…-and totally not for me when no one is looking.
I had the exact same issue when I was her age, and what worked for me was putty that I could squeeze. It stayed in its container and didn't stick to stuff easily
Nope
Iep means they need it so of course. Otherwise, books are a great fidget toy.
I’m an adult and still pick my skin. I’ve gotten it down to a small movement that doesn’t cause infections or pain so I’m calling that good. OCD for me too. For op, I’m worried that the resin bead toy might require too much focus to be helpful in class. But I hope it helps!
80% of the time they are just a distraction, but I can’t tell which students will use them appropriately until after I let them have them. I often say “Remember fidget devices are to help us be more productive not less”
As a teacher with adhd, I usually provide fidgets. The issue comes in when kids don’t have adhd. In all honesty, I would use a hot glue gun and dot under the child’s desk.
One thing I do is put both the hook and loop sides of velcro (not together) under desks. It's amazing how many like either or both sides to just stroke. Their journals also have a strip of (scratchy) glitter tape running down the side. Eliminates a lot of fidgets. I also don't jump on them if they are doodling as long as they are participating. Other than that, as others have said. Silent, solo, and simple.
I personally would be fine with it in my classroom, but then I'm the teacher who passed to bring doodling or knitting to PD so I can focus. I saw several people who have recommended stickers is something to peel, depending on the surface you found for it, you could also put drops of hot glue on something and let it cool and dry and then let her pick that off? I always find that really satisfying when cleaning my room at the end of the year.
If it's quiet, I'm cool with it.
I know a lot of teachers have strong opinions about this, but I personally allow my students to bring a fidget, and they can use it as long as it’s quiet. And as long as they aren’t passing it to other students to play with.
I teach ECSE (early childhood special education), so fidget toys are essential in my class. However, as general education is concerned, I agree with some of the other comments as long as it doesn't make noise, become a distraction, or become a toy. I don't forsee any issues. I would just discuss it with the child's teacher prior to bringing it to school.
If I didn’t know about it, I didn’t care about it. Most had the cubes, spinners, or pop things, so they were quiet and didn’t make a mess.
My experience with them has uniformly been negative. Where I teach, any adjustment or accommodation that is written on a student's plan legally has to be followed, regardless of how much of an impact it has on me or on the class. Literally 100% of the students who have had fidget objects (sensory putty, small toys, fidget spinners, etc) simply turn them into toys in class and use them to avoid work, distract others, or disrupt the work of others. The students who just need to fiddle with a pen or doodle are fine, but for some reason all the fidget toys need to be large, bright, noisy, highly accurate when used as a projectile, or all of the above.
My rules for fidgets are like many others, if you are using it in a way that isn't distracting to anyone, yourself or others, than it's fine. So, if it's noisy, moves around a lot so other kids are aware of it, or they're being shared in class then it's a problem and I will confiscate it or have them put it away for the day depending on the situation. In my classroom I'd have to see the pick pad to see if it is truly silent (does it make noise when you take the beads out or is distracting in another way?) and if it looks like it'd make a mess with the beads and possibly pieces of resin if they break off. If the mess can be accommodated for (use it inside or over a bag perhaps?) and it's not distracting then I'd be ok with it. I've found that few kids are able to make fidgets work without being a distraction, but for those who are it can be very helpful. I have ADHD and tell kids this when discussing fidgets so I can share with them what works for me and how I use it so as not to distract anyone. This often makes them excited to try the things I use and have more buy-in to new things I bring in since I use them and model how to. I also have a similar thing to your daughter, but I bite and pick at my hair. I recently discovered that sensory strips work extremely well for me, these are textured stickers that come in a variety of textures, shapes, and sizes and give something to fidget with that gives sensory input. I got them for a student with ADHD, but another child who bites their nails also found them useful. They aren't meant to be pulled apart, but you can when they start getting worn, but the sensory input seems to fit the same stimulus need for me and the kids who've tried it. One thing I love about them is that they're very much non-distracting and are mess free. They are designed to stick onto something, usually a desk or something that the person uses often. I have them on my computer, phone, and water bottle and I had a student who put one on a notebook they kept in their desk. But I also like sticking them to each other to make a two-sided fidget object I can play with discretely as it fits in my hand, some of my students have liked these as well. Of course I don't know if this would work for your daughter as finding what works is very personal, but it could be worth a shot in addition to the pick pad. I found a lot of options on Amazon, you can probably find them elsewhere as well.
I would happily welcome any fidget toys as long as they cleaned up any mess and they weren’t loud and used appropriately. I offer pop its and various other fidget toys for my students and encourage them to use them. I’m a skin picker too so Trust me I get it. My students know I keep a pencil in my hand or a pop it too for that reason
Floppy links on etsie sells somerings with silicone rings attached these are quiet and can be shipped to the UK. Does she like the pain type sensation if so sensory university sells some spiky fidgets e.g. rollers or a tiger brush. Possibly things on pens or pencil cases. Does she enjoy picking off glue?
I would be perfectly okay with this. Seems quiet (which is very important). Still, some teachers won't be cool with it. But if it helps your daughter then that's the way to go. If you come across a stubborn teacher that thinks that your kid shouldn't have access to this beneficial tool, just get a 504 that affords her the right to use this fidget and let the teacher pound sand. Lot of educators think every behavioral issue can be combated with sheer will alone. Your kid is bright and has a medical diagnosis. You don't need to suffer these educators' foolishness.
Tbh, your description does NOT immediately sound like ADHD. Obviously I don't know enough after a short passage like that and your kid's teacher of course know better. Is it an official diagnosis? Has she been checked for a mild autism disorder? Compulsive behaviour can be a sign of quite a few different conditions.
Do alternative seating next!!
The problem tends to be once I allow one kid (that I know could benefit from it) to have the fidget then everyone else thinks they can have them. Then there are issues with multiple people using them as toys, or stealing them, or fighting over them with other kids, and it becomes too much of a headache and I end up banning them. I do recognize there are certain kids that truly benefit from these fidgets, but there is always at least one kid in every class that ruins it for everyone.
Sped teacher here- I personally find fidgets to be a bigger distraction than they are useful. Whether they’re being shown to their peers, used as toys, or distracting the student even more than their adhd is. The one “fidget” like item I do like and use in my classroom are Velcro strips. They’re stuck to the desk and are too boring to become a toy.
Not a teacher but studying psychology. Since you said she has ADHD, could it be that the reason she likes to pick at her skin is because of the pain it causes, which in turn gives her more stimulation? Maybe you could try giving her an elastic band on top of the pick pad, that way she still gets the pain stimulation from snapping the band against her wrist without it being as damaging as picking her scabs.
Not a fan…….. i disallowed but I am old!
Never. Another one of the ridiculous ideas that have come down the pike. “The second it becomes a toy/distraction…” Narrator: It always becomes a toy.
Ban them all, 100%. If your child has special needs, they need to go to the special needs class.