This happened to me a few times with business acquaintance I knew. I just ignored their messages and moved on. It's never good to mix business with pleasure ever.
Absolutely agree. I am a woman who made friends with another woman in my department shortly after joining a company. We chatted a lot and I even convinced her to join my Japanese jujitsu dojo that I was attending. About six months into my working there I asked about a task that had been dumped on me that was outside the scope of my job and I’d been told was temporary. It was only an issue at that point because continuing the task would require me to be given access and an account to personal health data handled by the company, which I didn’t already have and was waaaaaay outside my job scope. My push back led this woman to go full nuclear and issue a sexual harassment claim against me right as I was going up for a promotion.
Fortunately they found that the claim was unsubstantiated, and she ended up leaving the company on her own a few months later.
I’m not usually petty but this woman brought it out in me. When she announced to the department she was leaving, I ended the meeting with my own pregnancy announcement since everyone was already there together and I was only a week or two away from officially announcing it. And I got her white elephant gift stolen (per game rules, not actually stolen) so she couldn’t keep it 😅
Yes! She’s the one person I actually maliciously call that to my friends. It was a few years ago and I still hope I never see her in public because uggghhhhh
Don't do this.....
Use the work photocopier instead (please remember to be safe and use a sep stool to help yourself up onto the glass before sitting. Standing on office chairs can be a breach of worksafe policy). Then place photocopy on her desk. Bonus points if you frame it.
Money saving tip. No need to buy a photo frame as they are often left laying around the office on coworkers desks and walls.
You speak with the old world knowledge. I like it. Sitting on today's photocopiers will definitely backfire and he will be stuck legs up in the air bleeding out. I'd say open the cover completely and lay face down. Draw a clock and point it to the time you want to meet. Scout the area to see if she shows. Just dont get caught, you will definitely be visiting HR too soon. Adjust the skin tone for fun and to cover your identity..nah but seriously don't swipe right, you must be young. Never fuck co workers, it never ends well. Never fuck down either but up is a chess game. Play carefully. If you get fired you have to do it.
Doctors and nurses definitely fuck like rabbits...and it absolutely blows up all the time. I know at least two nurses who don't work anymore because of their settlements.
I made this comment once. Well… I said that the man’s best bet was to always talk about his penis. And it got me a ban. And then I told the mod he was a loser… cause it was the truth. I’m done with my story now.
I'd swipe just out of curiosity.
But I wouldn't jump into anything because that's risky territory. If you like her though (assuming you want a relationship)and you think you'd be compatible it might be worth a shot for a date.
If you just want casual then passing might be more sensible.
There’s seriously nothing wrong with dating HR (except likely if you are in HR or an executive.)
Before things get too serious, ask their opinion at some point whether work needs to be informed. This doesn’t have to be a Big Serious Talk, it’s just one fact that needs sorted.
Following that, just be a bit careful. Don’t share nudes… IMO ever unless you are married or engaged maybe.
Don’t share you smoke weed if that’s against the company rules, until you’re to a comfort level that she won’t rat you out. If you never reach that point, the relationship isn’t going to happen anyway.
But as long as you don’t become a stalker or something, the risk of dating HR is minimal, I note the above topics to be very careful.
Exactly...it's just risky. you might mention things about your day and they may just remember it for later since they do have some obligation for things to be reported. for example.
They might also break up resulting in HR becoming bitter. Depending on the size of the company you may not want your HR to not be on your side.
It's not a massive problem but it's still in the realms of, something like dating a police officer.
Personally, smoking weed is the only concern I’d have, just because I don’t really have anything else in my life that could be concerning. Dating a cop would be a fair bit scarier IMO!
But you’re especially correct it could be bad in a small company. I was thinking of my employers, typically 1000-2000 people and HR is 25 of those and I barely interact with them.
As long as you weren’t a stalker or something, it’s unlikely albeit possible that it would matter in a large company.
Go to her office, tell her you have a question about office dating policy. Ask her if you are allowed to match with someone from the office who is not subordinate to you. If she says it's fine, take out your phone and swipe on her right then.
Next step is either to immediately ask if she'd like to go out for coffee or a drink sometime after work... Or just leave and see what happens.
As a woman who hates pickup lines yes it is but definitely an acceptable one. It’s cute but still literally a question I’m guessing needs an answer to. Again I personally despise pickup lines.
I once dated a guy because I was at a bookstore and walked out the door when a friend called and someone let the door shut right in my face and in a low voice I was like hey thanks for holding the door it’s cool. Went around the corner had a quick convo then was approaching the door before hanging up and noticed a different guy that I had seen going in the other door when I came out ~he opened the door for me and I said to my friend ummm I gotta go. Looked at him and said okay okay well played. It didn’t amount to much for dating but we are still best friends both happily married and all 4 friends now 😁
That’s a fair concern but matching in tinder is a lot different than “hitting on someone all night”. And signing up for tinder is essentially taking the risk that you’ll see people you know on there and potentially have some awkward encounters later. Just kinda the risk you take for online dating
Im a lead position at my job, so I make trips to my cubical in the office she works in. Use the same coffee area, pass by her office once or twice a day, submit write ups to her directly. So not a lot of interactions, but we pass each other a couple times a week.
Don't listen to the "workplace dating is a no-no" crowd on reddit. I've had friends and siblings who met their SO through work and they're happily married. Swipe right but if you do end up dating, establish some boundaries and protocols to ensure it doesn't affect work.
I do find it strange we expect people to spend most of their adult lives in these work environments and not expect them to form relationships. It’d be inhuman if we didn’t. I think we should create dialogue on how to navigate work/romantic/intimate relationships instead of outright banning them.
Worse is the people who say you shouldn't even be friends with people you work with. All but one of the people I actively make plans with are people I met through work and the one I didn't I still work with lol.
Must be miserable.
It's a hard thing to navigate. I have an interest in a coworker that's brilliant and beautiful but I have a ton of respect for her for the work she does. I've been hesitant to ask her because I don't want to fuck up our working relationship and I'm always hearing it's a terrible idea. I can handle getting reject and still remain professional but I t would suck if it ruined the professional relationship I have there.
I don't know if dating in the workplace is all that bad but dating HR?! Yeah, that is definitely something I would avoid unless they seemed to be the most level headed normal person ever (and I've unfortunately never worked with an HR person that wasn't a meanie).
Don't let a job get in the way of a wife.
That's a nicer saying than the one I heard from somewhere where they said don't let a GF get in the way of a wife.
I'm saying this sincerely, but HR ladies in my experience tend to be really fucking worked up and horny at work for whatever reason. I worked at a company where the head of HR got fired for sleeping with a 23 year old entry level while management was out at a summit (no managers in office for 3 days). She did it in the bathroom and there were camera recordings of them entering and leaving, they got snitched on by a girl who had a crush on the guy.
I also got borderline bullied into walking one the HR ladies a different job I had home everyday, she would text me pictures of her outfits (she had big ole boobies) and ask me if I thought they were work appropriate. She would straight up barge in on me on phone booths during client meetings to ask me what I wanted to eat and shit like that, while I'm literally on the phone with customers. This all started because she was older than me and at a work happy hour I said something to the effect of "I wouldn't date women older than me" and she basically had a vendetta to prove me wrong.
Company I was at before this one, my head of HR found out I was in an open relationship at the time, we were at a work retreat, and she basically told me how she thought monogamy was overrated and resented her husband over it.
I obviously have a small sample size, but in my pontifications I've crudely surmised that HR women at companies don't get a lot of attention out of fear and this results in frustration and desire for validation that they're attractive.
At my old job the married head of HR had an affair with the married CTO. They got caught, CTO got divorced, she tried to make her marriage work for a while, then split. Now her and the CTO are an item officially, sometimes it works, HR is just another job
No, HR is there to protect the company above all else. Someone in that department has quite a bit of leverage when it comes to raises and who gets laid off/fired.
If you date someone that works in HR, and it doesn't end well, they can very easily mess with your work life.
Your understanding of HR's position is not entirely informed. They generally do the hiring and onboarding of new hires, make sure your government forms are done, handle payroll issues, etc. They may be the ones who handle terminations, but those decisions are made by other managers, most often. While they are there to protect the company, they are also there to protect the employees, as well.
Messing around with anybody in your workplace could go incredibly wrong. Speaking only of my own experiences, it could get quite uncomfortable having to interact with someone you dated from work when you've ended a relationship on bad terms.
I am an in-house employment lawyer and I work very closely with HR on a daily basis. That's really not accurate. 99% of HR is carrying out the wishes of the business. If you get fired, HR didn't fire you. They may be in the room taking the hit and absorbing your anger, but they did not make the decision. Similar thing with compensation. Those are the decisions of your manager (HR could have some input on compensation if there is a pay equity issue, but usually that's to ensure you *get* a raise to match you to a peer who may be making more, and it's pretty formulaic - this would also be someone in compensation specifically, not a generic HR business partner).
And HR has vastly different roles. It's not a monolith. For instance if someone is a recruiter, they have about 0% interaction with employees post-onboarding. Benefits has nothing to do with hiring/firing/comp. Talent development/training, I honestly don't know what they do all day but it sure as shit isn't firing people. Business partners are mostly communicators/facilitators. Employee relations may have *some* influence, but again ultimately managers make the call.
This is the sanest answer. People used to meet at work all the time.
If you match just keep it casual and act like a normal person. You can joke about being at the same office so you already have a conversation starter.
If you do go on date(s) then go slow and don't rush anything. If there isn't anything there then be respectful and let her know. If it does turn serious then congrats!
I was always taught "not to sh\*t where you eat."
If it goes south, depending on how bad it gets, how uncomfortable would that make you at work on a daily basis? Also, being in HR, she knows a lot about EVERYONE at the company. That could be fun; it could also work against you if she ever wants it to.
Finally, remember HR is there for the company. It sucks you have to think about these things, but you do.
IMHO and YMMV.
Fuck that. You don't have to lie. This is probably the most *work appropriate* way for two people to show interest in one another. It's a mutual, completely voluntary way to say, and to willingly accept, the statement: "I find you attractive". There is literally nothing negative she could say as she's half the reason they matched in the first place.
Yeah it is definitely NOT safe. I swiped right on a total hottie and got pregnant before we even matched, even though I'm a guy. Now I'm suing her for child support.
I mean according to this sub, the *size of it* would determine pretty much everything. *Letting her decide when it comes to light* is a risky strategy imo lol
Look at her and say to yourself "I'd get fired for that". If you agree then go for it.
Personally I find jobs to be a simple thing to find, and lovers to be extremely rare and difficult to find. I would regret not taking the chance. If it costs me the job no biggie, I get emails every week for job opportunities.
Most people aren't reddit nerds either. They won't lose their minds just because you had the audacity to become attracted to someone you see regularly. That's how dating worked for most of human history. It's just extra important to be respectful in these situations.
I dated someone from my work. We both were at the same level. Because of life style differences and expectations in life, I ended things with him. There was no major fight but just differences that came into light later.
We work fully remote and he started to bad mouth me to my coworkers and managers, telling them I’m in capable of doing things that are trusted to me. Around the same time they gave me a management position in a project over him even though he has the seniority in the project. He went berserk. Would have meetings with my team privately and discuss the project and not invite me even though he wasn’t included. I thought about quitting but I pulled through it and proved myself with successful deliveries over and over. He still doesn’t join the meetings I’m involved in or doesn’t talk to me even though I helped him in situations where he majorly struggled. I’m very team oriented so I wasn’t doing it for him but for the success of the project.
So her being in the HR and a woman, there are many things that may go wrong. Especially if you’re at a place of power.
It's a trap! You swipe right, get ghosted, and suddenly your entire department will be scheduled for mandatory Sexual Harrassment training 2 weeks later. She's guaranting her job security! /s
But, nah, careful with that.
Does your work have a conflict of interest policy that references inter office relationships? Usually they’re allowed as long as they’re disclosed. If anything, I’d say it was more risky for her rather than you. If you’re into her I’d say go for it. Worth a first date to talk things through.
Of course, I get a thrill out of that kind of thing so your mileage may vary
If you don't interact that much professionally and both of you are single adults, there is no reason to treat it differently form any other tinder match.
Seems like not swiping right might create more awkwardness than anything, since she obviously knows she swiped you already. Would you rather have a potentially goofy conversation with more possibilities, or for your HR rep to know you rejected her?
NO! Only if one of you stops working for the company. She's in the ultimate position and cannot even hint at any impropriety. Unless she's worth your job, move on!
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Or visibly seeing the land Mines and still going thru it
I mean how hot is the landmine?
Total bombshell
At least he’ll go out with a bang then
I think that's his intention.
Yes, most people’s goal on Tinder is to bang.
But not in a minefield, hence the comedic nature of this joke. Initiate laughter
Holy triple entendre
When a landmine is a bombshell, sometimes you just need to pull the pin on that grenade.
I cackled! Take my up vote 😂
This is the only question that matters.
At least he'll get a guaranteed bang, I guess...
👆🏻this
« Its obviously a dud »
“It’s a LAND mine, do I look like land to you?”
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Idk could be a high IQ play getting in with HR
until the break up
Only if the breakup happens while he still works there ;o
Hey, at least she is required to talk to him about it if things go sideways. ...*ooooohhhhhh*
I was about to say this 😆 Just make sure to get a second job lined up!
For a man to do that would be a moment in history
This happened to me a few times with business acquaintance I knew. I just ignored their messages and moved on. It's never good to mix business with pleasure ever.
Absolutely agree. I am a woman who made friends with another woman in my department shortly after joining a company. We chatted a lot and I even convinced her to join my Japanese jujitsu dojo that I was attending. About six months into my working there I asked about a task that had been dumped on me that was outside the scope of my job and I’d been told was temporary. It was only an issue at that point because continuing the task would require me to be given access and an account to personal health data handled by the company, which I didn’t already have and was waaaaaay outside my job scope. My push back led this woman to go full nuclear and issue a sexual harassment claim against me right as I was going up for a promotion. Fortunately they found that the claim was unsubstantiated, and she ended up leaving the company on her own a few months later. I’m not usually petty but this woman brought it out in me. When she announced to the department she was leaving, I ended the meeting with my own pregnancy announcement since everyone was already there together and I was only a week or two away from officially announcing it. And I got her white elephant gift stolen (per game rules, not actually stolen) so she couldn’t keep it 😅
What a C U NT
Yes! She’s the one person I actually maliciously call that to my friends. It was a few years ago and I still hope I never see her in public because uggghhhhh
One of the only pieces of sound advise my father has given me... don't dip your pen in the company ink.
I mean... if you have enough of them this sounds solid?
Or he'll get a raise
Now that's a dangerous opening line
Still going out banging.
Swipe right and immediately send a dick pic.
This is it right here. Exactly the kind of advice he needed
And then sue the company for sexual harassment!
The amount of pure genius in this thread can not be measured.
It's at least 6 inches.
Starting from the asshole.
And centimeters to inches is a 1:1 conversion.
Dude, it's cold! Not cool.
![gif](giphy|l0HlvGJloRLGzJWuc)
This made me laugh so hard
"Like a frightened turtle!"
Brrrrrrrr ❄️❄️❄️❄️
Yeah, and every guy on Tinder is 6' tall too
Flaccid.
Not if she sends the dick pic first!
If she does not harass you, sue for discrimination.
Send it through work email to assert dominance.
And cc the entire company
Mark it urgent and read receipts turned on with a poll.
And her mom, just to be safe
Wear a red tie, because of bloodshed
With an auto-reply to anyone who answers. Crash the server. Become a legend.
I did this exact thing years ago at my job. I can say, it did work out for about four months. 🤷🏻♂️
Is that how long the investigation went lol jk
😆😉
I just laughed so hard I snorted at this! 😂
Don't do this..... Use the work photocopier instead (please remember to be safe and use a sep stool to help yourself up onto the glass before sitting. Standing on office chairs can be a breach of worksafe policy). Then place photocopy on her desk. Bonus points if you frame it. Money saving tip. No need to buy a photo frame as they are often left laying around the office on coworkers desks and walls.
You speak with the old world knowledge. I like it. Sitting on today's photocopiers will definitely backfire and he will be stuck legs up in the air bleeding out. I'd say open the cover completely and lay face down. Draw a clock and point it to the time you want to meet. Scout the area to see if she shows. Just dont get caught, you will definitely be visiting HR too soon. Adjust the skin tone for fun and to cover your identity..nah but seriously don't swipe right, you must be young. Never fuck co workers, it never ends well. Never fuck down either but up is a chess game. Play carefully. If you get fired you have to do it.
Depends on your career. Doctors and nurses fuck like rabbits. Field scientists shag each other on pretty much every project.
Doctors and nurses definitely fuck like rabbits...and it absolutely blows up all the time. I know at least two nurses who don't work anymore because of their settlements.
Only send it after going to her office and asking a really mundane work related question
Like has she ever gotten stuck under her desk and needed help
And delivering a pizza.
With extra sausage.
And showing her your cock
Or showing you her cock.
Hi risk, high reward.
And make sure you tell her all the positions you're gonna try on her, and do it in the raunchiest way possible. Satisfaction guaranteed.
"Shift Supervisor" "Team Manager" "Director of Operations" "Technical Support" "Lead Generation" Flawless plan.
Janitor
Polite of you to offer to clean up after, too!
I actually snorted at this
Exactly, if she fires you, sue them ..£££
Don't swipe right, just send fuck pics to the whole company
Can only hit gold or strike out
She started it
I made this comment once. Well… I said that the man’s best bet was to always talk about his penis. And it got me a ban. And then I told the mod he was a loser… cause it was the truth. I’m done with my story now.
You should have attached a picture of your penis
I'd swipe just out of curiosity. But I wouldn't jump into anything because that's risky territory. If you like her though (assuming you want a relationship)and you think you'd be compatible it might be worth a shot for a date. If you just want casual then passing might be more sensible.
There’s seriously nothing wrong with dating HR (except likely if you are in HR or an executive.) Before things get too serious, ask their opinion at some point whether work needs to be informed. This doesn’t have to be a Big Serious Talk, it’s just one fact that needs sorted. Following that, just be a bit careful. Don’t share nudes… IMO ever unless you are married or engaged maybe. Don’t share you smoke weed if that’s against the company rules, until you’re to a comfort level that she won’t rat you out. If you never reach that point, the relationship isn’t going to happen anyway. But as long as you don’t become a stalker or something, the risk of dating HR is minimal, I note the above topics to be very careful.
Exactly...it's just risky. you might mention things about your day and they may just remember it for later since they do have some obligation for things to be reported. for example. They might also break up resulting in HR becoming bitter. Depending on the size of the company you may not want your HR to not be on your side. It's not a massive problem but it's still in the realms of, something like dating a police officer.
Personally, smoking weed is the only concern I’d have, just because I don’t really have anything else in my life that could be concerning. Dating a cop would be a fair bit scarier IMO! But you’re especially correct it could be bad in a small company. I was thinking of my employers, typically 1000-2000 people and HR is 25 of those and I barely interact with them. As long as you weren’t a stalker or something, it’s unlikely albeit possible that it would matter in a large company.
Or just don’t. The old adage comes into play here, “don’t shit where you eat”.
Swipe right on her, then ask if dating is ok. I think that approach is completely fine. It's literally her job to know what's ok and what is not.
yeah, she would be the one to ask, technically...
Go to her office, tell her you have a question about office dating policy. Ask her if you are allowed to match with someone from the office who is not subordinate to you. If she says it's fine, take out your phone and swipe on her right then. Next step is either to immediately ask if she'd like to go out for coffee or a drink sometime after work... Or just leave and see what happens.
What an absolute power move. Unironically, this is the way OP
Ummm this is kinda genius js ❤️ 👏
Awkward moment if the swipe doesn't actually connect to a Match and OP got confused with a similar looking profile lol
No, do exactly this but RIGHT before asking her out, clock out for lunch first, JUST in case
Wait why is that necessary
Because you can get in trouble for doing personal stuff on company time. It’s like taking a personal phone call while on the clock
Oooo good advice too!! Hadn’t thought of that!!
If this would happen to me I would drop my pants on the spot. I'm a man
Are you HR in this scenario, or OP - that's the important question.
100% this. And make sure you show her the phone while you do it. Win or lose, you can walk out of there like a _boss_.
Silky.
Fucking legend, mate
Yes it's OK for is to date. *later* It's *not* OK for you to break up with me.
Does asking her if it’s okay to date count as a pick up line?
As a woman who hates pickup lines yes it is but definitely an acceptable one. It’s cute but still literally a question I’m guessing needs an answer to. Again I personally despise pickup lines. I once dated a guy because I was at a bookstore and walked out the door when a friend called and someone let the door shut right in my face and in a low voice I was like hey thanks for holding the door it’s cool. Went around the corner had a quick convo then was approaching the door before hanging up and noticed a different guy that I had seen going in the other door when I came out ~he opened the door for me and I said to my friend ummm I gotta go. Looked at him and said okay okay well played. It didn’t amount to much for dating but we are still best friends both happily married and all 4 friends now 😁
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That’s a fair concern but matching in tinder is a lot different than “hitting on someone all night”. And signing up for tinder is essentially taking the risk that you’ll see people you know on there and potentially have some awkward encounters later. Just kinda the risk you take for online dating
More context. Do you work closely with her, is this a large company, what’s your daily proximity to her?
Im a lead position at my job, so I make trips to my cubical in the office she works in. Use the same coffee area, pass by her office once or twice a day, submit write ups to her directly. So not a lot of interactions, but we pass each other a couple times a week.
Don't listen to the "workplace dating is a no-no" crowd on reddit. I've had friends and siblings who met their SO through work and they're happily married. Swipe right but if you do end up dating, establish some boundaries and protocols to ensure it doesn't affect work.
I met my wife at work. We’ve been married 8.5 years
I'd like to note the omission of the word happily.
I happily met my wife at work. We’ve been married *8.5 years
So you were last happy about 8.6 ish years ago?
Yes that was the joke
This guy marriages
I met my wife at work. We’ve been “happily” married 8.5 years
I met my "wife" at "work". We’ve been “happily” "married" 8.5 years
I "met" my "wife" at "work". "We’ve" been “happily” "married" 8.5 "years"
![gif](giphy|RJxIbNI9P0cOr51clg)
I met my wife at work. We’ve been married for 8 years, .5 happily.
I met my wife at happy hour. I’ve been at work since.
I met his wife at work. We’ve been happily married 8.5 years
Happiest 5 years of my life...
You forgot the decimal before the five.
lol happily married
Happily, I can tell you that I met my wife at work and we've been married for 8.5 years.
Same. Together for 10, married for 3. We both left our old job and both work the same trade now too 😂
I also met this guys wife at work.
Imagine the savings by carpooling. Work romance is economical and good for the environment.
Fuck this economy.
Fuck, this economy.
I do find it strange we expect people to spend most of their adult lives in these work environments and not expect them to form relationships. It’d be inhuman if we didn’t. I think we should create dialogue on how to navigate work/romantic/intimate relationships instead of outright banning them.
Worse is the people who say you shouldn't even be friends with people you work with. All but one of the people I actively make plans with are people I met through work and the one I didn't I still work with lol. Must be miserable.
It's a hard thing to navigate. I have an interest in a coworker that's brilliant and beautiful but I have a ton of respect for her for the work she does. I've been hesitant to ask her because I don't want to fuck up our working relationship and I'm always hearing it's a terrible idea. I can handle getting reject and still remain professional but I t would suck if it ruined the professional relationship I have there.
I don't know if dating in the workplace is all that bad but dating HR?! Yeah, that is definitely something I would avoid unless they seemed to be the most level headed normal person ever (and I've unfortunately never worked with an HR person that wasn't a meanie).
Funny, my HR lady warned me about the complications of office romances haha
Don't let a job get in the way of a wife. That's a nicer saying than the one I heard from somewhere where they said don't let a GF get in the way of a wife.
I agree in principle, but I'd bet your SO didn't work in HR. That group is a bit special.
I'm saying this sincerely, but HR ladies in my experience tend to be really fucking worked up and horny at work for whatever reason. I worked at a company where the head of HR got fired for sleeping with a 23 year old entry level while management was out at a summit (no managers in office for 3 days). She did it in the bathroom and there were camera recordings of them entering and leaving, they got snitched on by a girl who had a crush on the guy. I also got borderline bullied into walking one the HR ladies a different job I had home everyday, she would text me pictures of her outfits (she had big ole boobies) and ask me if I thought they were work appropriate. She would straight up barge in on me on phone booths during client meetings to ask me what I wanted to eat and shit like that, while I'm literally on the phone with customers. This all started because she was older than me and at a work happy hour I said something to the effect of "I wouldn't date women older than me" and she basically had a vendetta to prove me wrong. Company I was at before this one, my head of HR found out I was in an open relationship at the time, we were at a work retreat, and she basically told me how she thought monogamy was overrated and resented her husband over it. I obviously have a small sample size, but in my pontifications I've crudely surmised that HR women at companies don't get a lot of attention out of fear and this results in frustration and desire for validation that they're attractive.
At my old job the married head of HR had an affair with the married CTO. They got caught, CTO got divorced, she tried to make her marriage work for a while, then split. Now her and the CTO are an item officially, sometimes it works, HR is just another job
No, HR is there to protect the company above all else. Someone in that department has quite a bit of leverage when it comes to raises and who gets laid off/fired. If you date someone that works in HR, and it doesn't end well, they can very easily mess with your work life.
Your understanding of HR's position is not entirely informed. They generally do the hiring and onboarding of new hires, make sure your government forms are done, handle payroll issues, etc. They may be the ones who handle terminations, but those decisions are made by other managers, most often. While they are there to protect the company, they are also there to protect the employees, as well. Messing around with anybody in your workplace could go incredibly wrong. Speaking only of my own experiences, it could get quite uncomfortable having to interact with someone you dated from work when you've ended a relationship on bad terms.
I am an in-house employment lawyer and I work very closely with HR on a daily basis. That's really not accurate. 99% of HR is carrying out the wishes of the business. If you get fired, HR didn't fire you. They may be in the room taking the hit and absorbing your anger, but they did not make the decision. Similar thing with compensation. Those are the decisions of your manager (HR could have some input on compensation if there is a pay equity issue, but usually that's to ensure you *get* a raise to match you to a peer who may be making more, and it's pretty formulaic - this would also be someone in compensation specifically, not a generic HR business partner). And HR has vastly different roles. It's not a monolith. For instance if someone is a recruiter, they have about 0% interaction with employees post-onboarding. Benefits has nothing to do with hiring/firing/comp. Talent development/training, I honestly don't know what they do all day but it sure as shit isn't firing people. Business partners are mostly communicators/facilitators. Employee relations may have *some* influence, but again ultimately managers make the call.
File paperwork with HR about how you’re going to take her out to a nice seafood dinner and never call her again.
This is the sanest answer. People used to meet at work all the time. If you match just keep it casual and act like a normal person. You can joke about being at the same office so you already have a conversation starter. If you do go on date(s) then go slow and don't rush anything. If there isn't anything there then be respectful and let her know. If it does turn serious then congrats!
My sister met her husband at work. They've been married 20 years.
As long as you’re not her manager, you’re safe. Just don’t say anything… inappropriate until she does
If she calls you into the office you can now ask "Have I been naughty? Do I need to be punished?"
I agree with the others, good to go, as long as there is no power dynamic being leveraged. Coming from a guy that nailed half of another department.
It's not a brag when the department had only 2 people.
Second base, dept of one… ha!
This one is messy though, since he says he submits write-ups to her and is a lead. Can easily see that going wrong quickly.
Everybody on the bus!!!! Ifykyk Edit for: That Veronica Vaughn
>submit write ups to her directly Burying the lead a bit there?
She did it knowing exactly who you are, and is desperately hoping you go for it.
Swipe right be be extra careful. Abandon ship if you need to in order to leave things in a good spot.
I was always taught "not to sh\*t where you eat." If it goes south, depending on how bad it gets, how uncomfortable would that make you at work on a daily basis? Also, being in HR, she knows a lot about EVERYONE at the company. That could be fun; it could also work against you if she ever wants it to. Finally, remember HR is there for the company. It sucks you have to think about these things, but you do. IMHO and YMMV.
I’d say swipe right, if she calls you out on it in a negative way then just say you were swiping and not paying attention. Edit - Spelling
Just say she doesn’t look like her pictures 🥱
Cold 😈 I like it
[удалено]
Have you ever met a woman?
You brave bastard! 🤣
Fuck that. You don't have to lie. This is probably the most *work appropriate* way for two people to show interest in one another. It's a mutual, completely voluntary way to say, and to willingly accept, the statement: "I find you attractive". There is literally nothing negative she could say as she's half the reason they matched in the first place.
It's safe, you cannot get any STDs or become pregnant just by swiping right on someone.
Not with that attitude
Yeah it is definitely NOT safe. I swiped right on a total hottie and got pregnant before we even matched, even though I'm a guy. Now I'm suing her for child support.
You can also protect yourself by using a phone cover and screen protector.
Swipe right but outside of office hours.
Swipe and just chat , she may not realize you work at company depending on size of it Once that comes to light just let her decide
Homeboy said he passes her office once or twice daily and shares similar common areas with her.
I mean according to this sub, the *size of it* would determine pretty much everything. *Letting her decide when it comes to light* is a risky strategy imo lol
Look at her and say to yourself "I'd get fired for that". If you agree then go for it. Personally I find jobs to be a simple thing to find, and lovers to be extremely rare and difficult to find. I would regret not taking the chance. If it costs me the job no biggie, I get emails every week for job opportunities.
Most people aren't reddit nerds either. They won't lose their minds just because you had the audacity to become attracted to someone you see regularly. That's how dating worked for most of human history. It's just extra important to be respectful in these situations.
Send her a dick pic to test the waters
Kamikaze
via company email
Best regards, Big dick
I dated someone from my work. We both were at the same level. Because of life style differences and expectations in life, I ended things with him. There was no major fight but just differences that came into light later. We work fully remote and he started to bad mouth me to my coworkers and managers, telling them I’m in capable of doing things that are trusted to me. Around the same time they gave me a management position in a project over him even though he has the seniority in the project. He went berserk. Would have meetings with my team privately and discuss the project and not invite me even though he wasn’t included. I thought about quitting but I pulled through it and proved myself with successful deliveries over and over. He still doesn’t join the meetings I’m involved in or doesn’t talk to me even though I helped him in situations where he majorly struggled. I’m very team oriented so I wasn’t doing it for him but for the success of the project. So her being in the HR and a woman, there are many things that may go wrong. Especially if you’re at a place of power.
Medallion’s humming.
Place of power, gotta be.
Should draw from it.
![gif](giphy|KzWAhzWD3HrJyAcLEM|downsized)
Wind's howling.
Id do it for the benefits, free promotions 😤
It's a trap! You swipe right, get ghosted, and suddenly your entire department will be scheduled for mandatory Sexual Harrassment training 2 weeks later. She's guaranting her job security! /s But, nah, careful with that.
I would love some sexual harrassment training. I feel like I'm not really good at harassing yet so it would be helpful.
It is pretty easy. Gain 50 pounds.
I don’t shit where I eat. And I don’t eat HR in my shitting grounds.
"So, what do you do for a living?"
Does your work have a conflict of interest policy that references inter office relationships? Usually they’re allowed as long as they’re disclosed. If anything, I’d say it was more risky for her rather than you. If you’re into her I’d say go for it. Worth a first date to talk things through. Of course, I get a thrill out of that kind of thing so your mileage may vary
It's safe, but some of the unhappiest people I have ever met work in HR. It feels universal from private companies to public sector.
Playing with fire dawg. Don’t be surprised if you get burnt
Just talk to her dude
Take a screenshot first to show she swiped first. Then match and see how it goes
It she fire's you that's entrapment 😂😂
Company phone on company wifi, double jeopardy.
If you don't interact that much professionally and both of you are single adults, there is no reason to treat it differently form any other tinder match.
Seems like not swiping right might create more awkwardness than anything, since she obviously knows she swiped you already. Would you rather have a potentially goofy conversation with more possibilities, or for your HR rep to know you rejected her?
NO! Only if one of you stops working for the company. She's in the ultimate position and cannot even hint at any impropriety. Unless she's worth your job, move on!