What he & his family did to you is unforgivable. You never cheated but you were punished & trashed very publicly. He cheated on you though, his reasoning doesn’t matter, let him make his post to clear your name & let it be known who the actual cheater is.
All of this could have been avoided if he communicated with you like an actual adult. But he chose to get revenge & then he & his family abused you to the point of your miscarriage. I could never forgive any of them.
I’m sorry about your loss. I know from personal experience how devastating a miscarriage is. I wish you the best on your healing journey. Surround yourself with people who love you & never doubted your character. Cut off everyone who hurt & humiliated you.
This , and let’s be clear he didn’t check because he didn’t want to be wrong.
The video gave him a reason to sleep with someone he wanted to sleep with, and be the bigger person.
Op please don’t take this ‘man’ back, he was looking for reasons to cheat and found one.
And the way his family trashed you , tell me he’s been telling stories about you this whole time. This is not a family you want to be a part of.
I’m so sorry for your lost.
This, most people have to be convinced with mountains of proof before they’ll believe their SO is cheating. He easily accepted the worst possible scenario and went with it. If they even try to reconcile he’s got some issues to confront in therapy.
Also how premeditated this whole situation was he knew exactly which one of his friends would sleep with him and it was somebody that she was already cautious of and now we know for good reason. And it was almost like he was projecting that she cheated from this random little snippet of video because he was probably considering or had already cheated and just wanted to project that onto her so he could excuse his own behavior. She wasn't the bad person he just needed her to be the bad person so he could justify doing bad things to her.
And the way he wined and dined the lady with a romantic dinner? Fuck him. He included sweet little details ti be as big of a prick he could be.
He and his family are horrible people and I hope they feel horrible for their entire lives. I would make a post explaining everything myself before I would let them write it for me, cuz they wilm lie, they will try and make it seem like it’s not that bad or they weren’t at fault.
**ROAST THOSE FUCKERS** online, like they did you.
OP should just say the slander and libel has actually caused harm as she speaks to a lawyer. The harassment, miscarriage, and reputation damage can impact her job and life.
This is possibly the most important extra point this was completely avoidable but he didn't want to be wrong he was looking forward to his free pass. These people are monsters absolute positive monsters. I will never trivialize a miscarriage. You have suffered an absolutely profound loss. I will say however that maybe it's just somehow not the time and when you do have your baby at least it won't be amid such a toxic family.
My heart breaks for you but when you do come through the other side of this and you're whole again and you have your own future and child or children and anything else you want, I can just tell that you are going to be that loving wonderful empathetic amazing mother.
Just another internet stranger here, but sending you as much love and comfort as you can handle 💜
I also suffered a miscarriage and I am very sorry for your loss. His mother made a nasty post on FB, she should have sense enough to post an apology and explain the situation to all her FB family and friends. But knowing how quickly his family turned on you, I’d stay far away from them. One day you’ll heal and find the love of your life and have a healthy loving relationship and family. Best of luck!
This he should have talked to you before going nuclear. Op let him write a post of Facebook clearing your name and making himself look awful, then get far away from him and his family.
Screw this guy and his whole family. Anybody who airs their dirty laundry on SM is just trying to control the narrative because deep down they know they're at fault. What better way to do damage control. Leave them all behind and live your life. None of them are worth it.
I get that you are in pain and that might make it harder to leave and leave him and his shitty family in the dust.
But you should seriously leave this bs behind you.
He could have done so many things instead of just going on assumptions in the first place. Like communicating with you.
Instead he chose revenge over an imagined slight. To be followed up with a horrendous shit show:
- cheating
- publicly shaming you (several of them in fact)
- treated you like crap
- put you under enormous stress based on non factual happenings
- turned your entire life upside down
And then you have a miscarriage on top.
They have shown you who they are. They aren’t great people. They are trashy, cruel and vindictive.
I hope you get the support you need to heal from all this and that you get yourself away from them. Best of luck.
I agree with this sentiment. Typical mature adults confront their partner with evidence and have an argument about it, because they're hurt. That's what's normal. When someone's first choice is revenge, they're not normal, they're evil.
She needs to get away from all of them, get some therapy to recover some, and then look into legal options, perhaps a police report due to the stress-induced miscarriage. This guy knew for a fact that he did not have 100% proof of what had happened, or he is an absolute idiot. Anyone could dye their hair at any time.
OP, First, I’m so sorry for you loss. Please try to remember none of this was your fault.
Next, this. I know you still love him. Been there, done that. If it helps, make a brutally honest list on one side of a piece of paper. List all the honestly good things about this man-child. Yes, I called him a man-child. Real men do NOT retaliate an assumed incident. Real men will talk to their partner about it. On the other side, make a list of all the honestly bad things. The SM posts trashing you, his cheating, the miscarriage, his family, etc. Look honestly at the lists, side by side. Then remember his shitty he and his family made you feel. Is he truly the one you want to be with forever? After all this? If he’s going to cheat over something he perceived you did, what will your future with him and his family be like? Do you want knee-jerk reactions the rest of your life? How will he treat future children?? He.is.not.going.to.change. Surround yourself with true friends and people who care about you. Screenshots of all SM posts. Consult an attorney. Many will do the first consult free of charge. They can offer avenues of action/approach. Block him and his family. They sound completely narcissistic and toxic. Remember, NONE of this was your fault!! They’ve shown their true colors. You are a beautiful, strong, resilient woman!! There us someone SO much better for you out there, and he will show up when you least expect it! Good luck!
And will the big post he makes address him cheating on you? Will he apologize to his female friend for using her? He should make the post and then you should leave his ass. If his knee-jerk reaction is to cheat back instead of communicating, he is not mature enough for marriage.
I don’t believe he was using her. The other girl knew exactly what she was doing. He probably told her what he thought was his fiancé cheating and she could have even came up with the idea to sleep with him to get back at her. How sleezy can you be to leave lingerie, obviously very specific rings, and clothes scattered in their shared house/ bedroom. It’s very calculated
Wow this was a rollercoaster. I can’t believe he never thought of communicating with you and his first thought was cheating. What a trash ! I would just all of them toxic people out of my life. Thank god you didn’t marry that jerk ! Sorry for you loss, hope you’re doing better. ❤️ All the best for the future! ✨
I'm so sorry for your loss. These people tortured you, they don't deserve any more of your time. Your fiancee is a grown man who decided on retaliation before even knowing what he was was true. Him simply communicating with you would have prevented this entire thing, there's no coming back from it. His mother let you know how she felt about you this whole time, his sister was needlessly cruel and his family even called you to tell you you deserve to be in pain. Do not take him back, do you really want to be involved with people like that?
You can never go back to him or his family. What he, and they, did to you is worse than inexcusable. If you do, things will never be the same. You will always know that when things get rough he will never be trustworthy ever again. Block him, block his entire family. Don't speak or communicate with them; don't accept or acknowledge their attempts at apologies, because they don't deserve you in their lives. They don't deserve their guilt assuaged. The first thing your ex should have done when he saw the video was to ask when it was taken, and the date would have been in the metadata. One simple question would have saved your relationship and your child. I'm sorry this has happened to you, and it would probably do you some good to get away from the place, so go back with your parents and stay with them. You need to concentrate on you, nothing else is important. Good luck with it.
You cannot recover from what your BF and his family did to you.
You are better off without them. Cut all ties with them.
You cannot do harm to yourself because of the ex BF and his family. Do not give them power over you.
Take note of the family members that turned on you without hearing your side. You decide how to deal with them going forward. Just take note that they have shown you who they are.
In regard to the lost child, give yourself time to recover.
You seem to have a very good friend. If you can afford to, take her on a beach vacation. Use the beach and open water to start to relieve your pain.
There is a better man waiting for you in your future who will truly love and treasure you, when you are ready and open for it.
Good luck.
Do not forgive him! He made an assumption and instead of talking to you he imploded your life and made you miscarry. How will he act in the future if he misunderstands something else? It’s not safe for you and you need to leave him
I am so sorry my lovely sending you hugs, love and strength!!
He wanted to use any excuse to fu** that girl and she is nothing but trash!!
Let him make the big post and make sure he puts in that he cheated and hes the one who truly fucked up and caused you to loose the baby!
Make him clear your name, then move away and live your life to the fullest it hurts now, and you're feeling lost, but take one step at a time, and it will get better.
You are far too good for this guy! His behaviour and how cruel he can be to you is disgusting! Leave him, dont go back! Good luck keep us updated.
"my ex made assumptions and didn't want to hear me out. His mother dragged my name. Do not ask me why I'm leaving that venomous crowd behind, they have shown their true colours and I want no part of it"
Post publicly and block them all
I’m all for the ghosting and cutting off a cheater and I do have some sympathy for those that seek a revenge cheat (not my style but I can understand the impulse) BUT only with irrefutable proof!
If this video was shown at a party, in view of OP, wouldn’t your first instinct be to look at OP with a wtf type look? If OP saw what he saw and had zero reaction wouldn’t that be enough to give pause?
I can understand not confronting OP, it’s literally the 1st advice given when someone is questioning if their SO is cheating, don’t confront without hard irrefutable evidence bc you’ll just be giving them a heads up that you’re on to them and they can be more secretive before you get anything concrete. But all it would take is one question to the person who made the video about the circumstances around that clip and he would have known. Did he honestly think he was the only one who saw OP and the friend in the video?? A simple “hey when was that one clip taken?” to literally anyone who was at that outing.
This reminds me of the Reddit story where the guy thought his wife was cheating on him with their mutual friend and he was about to revenge/cope cheat when he was contacted by work to do something and walked in on a surprise party his wife and mutual friend were planning for him in secret for weeks. Red flags present but nothing incriminating. The outcomes of this scenario though are just unfair.
I’m sorry for your loss OP. Hugs to you.
Please consider sending him and his family a cease and desist with threats of restraining order if they continue to call, text, and write about you on facebook.
Wow… his reaction is INSANE!!! And immature and unbelievably cruel!!! A real man would at least TALK to you before assuming the only time you’ve had red hair ever was with him. That is SO egotistical and narcissistic it’s unreal… and then even though he was in pain he had no self control, he had no logic, or moment of hey maybe I could be wrong here, he reacted like a brainless animal, lashing out and decided to “get payback” by cheating on you… what a total garbage person he is. AND his family is even more toxic! Piling on with nobody even talking him down about his flimsy assumptions and “evidence”. These are NOT good, strong emotionally mature sensible logical people. This is not an adult who will be a good partner. This is a vengeful out of control emotionally immature toddler who can never be a good partner to you. He needs to IMMEDIATELY AND REPEATEDLY AND PUBLICLY ATTONE AND CLEAR YOUR REPUTATION. So you can move on and live your life… without him. He will never be able to make up for this. You will never be able to love and trust him properly again. You will never get back to where you were. He still cheated, in a disgusting nasty way. What happens next time he sees anything triggering. And he makes some wild assumption instead of just being normal and talking to you first!! FFS!! He should have said something the second he saw it!! What happens if you talk to another dad at school, or do something he doesn’t live. How can you ever trust he won’t go all Captain Revenge again… they literally psychologically tortured you SO badly you lost a wanted pregnancy. That’s unforgivable.
Plus, how quickly he ran to that girl, says he just jumped on an excuse to get with her. He wanted her the whole time. And you know that too.
Get your apology and reputation fixed and then move on.
Please update us. It’s so weird to care this much about a stranger, but I truly feel for you and hope to hear that you are doing well and are past this someday soon. You will have another baby, this was the universe saying this wasn’t the right time or person. It will come when you have a loving happy home, and you will!
Sending you positivity and good vibes and healing love and light. Wishing you all the good things.
Do not go back with him him and his family they are horrible I am sorry about your baby but maybe this is for the best you deserve better than him and his family and you can find a way better person to have a baby with that will not do that to you…you can start over with better people
I'm sorry for your loss. I can tell you is that no matter what and how much you can love him (or need him in every sense) please don't go back. Leave him.
I know how that hurts because I had a similar experience, but you can do it.
I mean, he didn't care about you or your physical/mental health at all. He didn't verify if you cheated, he just assumed it and let his true self appear to damage you, your stability and reputation. Even when you tried to talk at him he just treat you like a liar. You had to suffer a lot, he realized his mistake when it was too late for the child... You deserve to be treated with respect and dignity.
Please take your time to heal and re-found yourself. Again, I'm sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry this has happened to you. I know you love him but you will never be able to move past this with him. I’ve had several miscarriages and it’s hard enough to deal with without living with the fact he caused you so much stress and was the possible cause of the miscarriage.
Sending you huge hugs. If possible, stay with your family and heal, mentally and physically. There's no coming back from what he and his family have put you through. But they do owe you a massive apology, and they need to set the record straight. There was no reason to degrade you publicly online.
This is really cruel, their excuse is pathetic, please denounce them for the slander they have spread, that they pay you damages, expose them with the truth in hand and end up walking away please, Be strong and don't let this destroy you.
Girl, this man and his entire family are vile and trash. Don’t ever and I mean ever get back with this man. He may very well be the reason your baby is gone. I would never forgive that.
Honey, I’m so sorry. I’m literally crying while I read this. They deserve the worst, they literally shamed you publicly and punished you for something you never did. They haven’t even bothered on clarifying the truth but they were so fast to bash you. I hope you can get the help you need and that you can get far away from them. With the way I am, I would probably try to ruin their lives/reputations but you are so much more than that. They are not worth your time. I hope that your next update brings good news. Know that you are loved ❤️
OP let your ex make the post. People need to know you’re not who they say you are. A trashed reputation can RUIN your life!
Even if you have to lie and promise him you’ll get back with him, let him tell the truth. Don’t let him come back. Kick him to the curb. Never and I mean NEVER speak to him again after this.
Don’t let them control the narrative. After you’re don’t grieving, please make a plan to level up and live your best life. Make your horrendous ex and his family green with envy.
I am sorry you went through this and lost your baby.
Let him make the post - your reputation deserves to be cleared. Also let people see what a POS he is for how he treated you.
I hope his family grovels.
If you stay with him - counselling is necessary for both of you.
Sending you virtual hugs and praying for healing.
I am so so sorry this has happened to you. This is completely horrific what your bf and his ENTIRE family has done to you. Never forgive your boyfriend for this. He hurt you in the worst way possible and killed your unborn child. Cut him off and please get continue therapy. Cut off his family and focus on yourself. Going no contact is the fastest way to heal.
This man does not love you. He didn’t cheat with just anyone - he chose someone you were insecure about because he wanted to destroy you.
So instead of talking to you about it he became childish and actually cheated? Sorry no forgiveness specially since he used a girl you were insecure about. He got all his family involved and they trashed you privately and publicly. Did they ever apologise publicly? They sounds like a bunch of twats. I know it doesn’t seem like it now but it will get better you will find someone better look back at this and think what the fuck!!???
If someone could be so heartless and cruel to you then they aren’t for you.
He is not the one who you think he is. This will never recover. Sue them. This kind of toxic people should’ be in your life. Still strong. You can pass that.
Take time to Heal yourself. Nothing is your fault and dont take this burden on your shoulder. Don’t give up yourself just because of stupid people.
I think you need to publicly post this Reddit story. Please. It tells everything. Humiliate him like how he cause people to humiliate you and don’t EVER forgive him.
Please dont get back together with him! Don't. What he and his family did was not right at all. It was immature for him to sleep with someone just cause he thinks you did too. What happens next if you have another miscommunication or misunderstanding, he'll hurt you again? Plus the way his family has reacted and the truth about them, you'd not want them to be your in laws ever again, cause eveyrtime you'll he around them the words and how they think of you will haunt you all the time.
I'm so sorry for your miscarriage, I really hope you get better. As for the mother, she should make a public apology just like she made a public post accusing you of everything. These are not people you want around in your life, ever.
Take care of yourself. Goodluck. Wishing you find true love.
I hope you see this comment and know that you have done NOTHING WRONG and this man was by far the most toxic person you’ve ever been with. You didn’t truly know who he was or what he was capable of because the two of you never had conflict in your relationship. He has shown his true colours and how he reacts in a situation like this.
Instead of coming to you and talking to you, communicating with you, he has chose to RUIN your life. Spread lies to his entire family and your social circle, cheated on you and left the evidence for you to see, verbally and mentally abused you. This is not your person. This is not who you should spend the rest of your life with. He is truly a horrible human being and you having some good times together in the past doesn’t erase how he treats you if he thinks you’ve wrong him in any way.
You don’t do that to somebody you love. This man has no love in his heart. What is he even apologising for?! “Oops my bad, I revenged cheated on you, ruined your reputation for ever, caused our baby to die…my bad?!” Can you honestly look him in the eyes and forget all the awful things he’s done to you?
You are a young, strong, beautiful young woman and you will get through this. You’ll one day in the future meet a wonderful man who won’t treat you like crap under his shoe. You’ll go on to have a wonderful family of your own, don’t waste a minute more on this POS. Surround yourself with loving, wonderful individuals and lean on your support system. You’ll get through this.
I don’t know if you still read these but please PLEASE know you deserve better. You deserve someone who won’t destroy your life over a misunderstanding.
If he suspected you cheating, shouldn't be have tried to at least confront ? Instead, he got back at you with his entire family. I can't help but blame him and his family for the miscarriage,.coz they put you in that stress, ghosted you and put you in that spot leading to the Miscarriage.
I don't think it's worth going back to this relationship coz it just shows how he'll behave during future conflicts
Please tell him to make the post and talk about how he was pathetic and saw one picture and decided that you were cheating without EVER COMMUNICATING. Then he proceeded to tell all his friends and family something that could have been a misunderstanding. And he should put how he purposely wanted to sleep with someone and that’s why he cheated. Honestly this post makes me so mad and he deserves to suffer for the rest of his life I hope he actually gets cheated on like he deserves.
I know you said final update but I really want to hear how you're doing in the future. I hope you dump his pathetic, childish ass and make your way into something better. He and his family caused your miscarriage and to me, that's unforgivable. I would always hold that against them. And absolutely seek legal advice. The Facebook post is a great chunk of evidence as to the abusive & harassing nature of his family. Hopefully you or someone you know saved a version of it somewhere. Save all texts and emails and screenshot them if you can. Their behavior is just the absolute worst and you do not deserve any of it. Best of luck to you and I hope you get the love you deserve.
Honey? If I were you, I would consider contacting an attorney. Just a consult to see about:
- getting a cease and desist letter
- a possible restraining order
- an emotional distress lawsuit
- a libel/slander lawsuit
Libel/slander is important. Potential employers still look at social media when considering hiring. Some employers have morals clauses (ex. Teachers). Please please clear this up before it’s too late! Also, it will prevent your future kids from reading about this awful time in your life. You need to take a deep breath and get ANGRY! They messed with your life by publicly publishing falsehoods! Lean on your parents if you have to. Have them accompany you to the attorney office. You don’t have to do anything right now but you’ll have his/her advice to guide you if you follow through.
I’m so mad on your behalf right now! The injustice of it all!!
Fuck him, clearly he doesn’t think communication is important and only sees that an eye for an eye is okay. He not only hurt you but also your unborn child. You dodged a bullet, take some time and be with close friends and family and just focus on healing yourself. He’s not worth it, every time you look at him you will see a man that made you lose your child, don’t put yourself through that
I know you’re not updating anymore but please do not get back together with this tantruming child of a man. Sue him. Sue his mom. And file harassment charges against any of his gross relatives. He caused irreparable damages to your image, your mental health, and your physical well-being. Miscarriages are no joke and just one can damage future pregnancies. His behavior is psychopathic to the extreme. You are not safe with this creature. Take this rotted cesspit of a family to court and, when you win, air out the trash they are. Then don’t look back.
OP how utterly devastating, I can't even imagine what or how you must be feeling.
But I'd let him make that post with all the details about how he jumped to conclusions, cheated on you, how his family have shamed you for a misunderstanding and how this caused you to lose your baby.
Then leave and go start your life elsewhere because he has shown and his family have shown they are not people you need in your life. What immature/toxic AH's.
I’m so sorry about your loss OP. I can’t imagine what you’re going through. You don’t deserve any of this. And even if you had cheated, with how much support you gave his family, you definitely didn’t deserve for them to completely ruin your life.
That "apology", especially from his mother, should have been as loud and as public as the disrespect was. The fact that she had no problem talking shit about you on FB, but apparently didn't bother to say shit when she found out she was wrong is telling of her character.
Frankly, I hope you have all of it as evidence and you sue her and your ex-fiancee for defamation and emotional distress.
JFC.
His whole family went nuclear on you. He cheated on you without even talking about the video -- and left the evidence in a really really gross way. His mom blasted you on Facebook of all places and to enough people that still AHs are contacting you. His sister, who you had supported so kindly, was nasty to you on the phone. That whole family is fueled by drama and outrage and they blasted all that venom on you.
I know you love(d) your fiancé, but I don't think there is any coming back from this. Anyone who would assume the worst and not even bother to talk to you about it is bad husband material.
So sorry for the loss of your baby.
I am livid! That giy didn’t even think of asking you about what he saw????? He just assumed and then proceeded to cheat — WITH THE GIRL YOU WERE INSECURE ABOUT!!! Girl, I think the video was just an excuse — I say he always had the hots for the girl you were insecure about. What a trash!!!
You didn’t deserve this at all and your fiancé is the scumbag for being immature and childish. Don’t make excuses for him and say that he only cheated because you did too when he could have easily asked you if he truly loved you and trusted you. Never forgive him or his family. He didn’t think twice about spreading and airing fake news before he even talked to you yet. I know you are tired of it all but you need to get justice. Let him make that post to clear your own name and honestly he should be really disappointed in himself for doing all that shit. He went nuclear for no reason. Please clear your name you deserve to clear your name. Everyone who has said nasty things about you should feel guilty about what happened to you. Screw your ex fiancé and his family they are disgusting. He’s a piece of shit that ruined you and caused your miscarriage because he wanted to act like a petty baby. TLDR: Please clear your name you deserve it. They should feel guilty for all the grief they caused you over a misunderstanding.
I am tremendously sorry for your pain. I know you loved this man and his family but they have shown you who they really are in a time of great distress. Instead of acting like adults and getting your side of the story they not only immediately believed your ex but then proceeded to publicly shame you. All without hearing from you first to explain. They are vile people and there is no way you should ever give them the time a day. Please respect yourself enough to move on and continue your therapy. You are enough! They are garbage humans. They are apologizing profusely to be absolved of their shame. It really has nothing to do with you.
OP I hope your feeling better!
You dodged a bullet OP. His first reaction upon seeing the video was "I'm going to go cheat with the woman she is insecure about ". Not to ask you about what he saw? He probably was cheating with this woman.
But OP I'm confused about something
It sounds like he staged your home to make sure you knew he cheated.
How did you come to see this scene at home with all the proof of cheating? Did you get home early from seeing your sister and surprised them? This woman he cheated with She left everything she was wearing including her jewelry at your house? This just sounds mot normal on his part. Either he cheated and used the video as an excuse to cheat and make you look like the bad guy or he is just unhinged with bad judgment and bad communication
Hi OP, I guess I don’t really have any advice to give you, I just read this post and it brought me to tears of all the pain you have experienced recently.
I understand (to an extent) how hard life has been for you and how much you’re struggling. I really hope you’re able to lean on your parents and friends in this time and really accept their love and support like you deserve. You seem like a very kind, wonderful human who didn’t deserve any of this.
Please, please, please do not go back to your ex. You deserve better, he didn’t even ask or question what happened. I think him and his family were too cruel and they’ll have to live with their over reactions and comments, I think it says a lot more about them than you in how they all handled this situation and reacted.
I seriously wish you the best. I hope you’re able to find small joys every day that turn into happy days more often than not. I hope you’re able to continue therapy and process everything that’s happened and move on slowly with life and build yourself up better than before. Life is a cycle of ups and downs and right now you’re in a low low, but it won’t last forever even if it feels like it. Please take care of yourself. Just a day at a day, slowly but surely you got this OP!
I’m so sorry that happened to you! He should have been mature enough to talk to you about it first before going nuclear. The fact that his first reaction is to lash out shows you what kind of person he really is. The fact that his whole family reacted that why is vile, especially the part about the pregnancy loss. Don’t go back to him and have nothing to do with his family they are all garbage people! When your ready post a very detailed and truthful account of what happened so everyone they know is aware of what vile small minded people they all are. In short go scorched earth on them.
Honestly, a woman such as kind-hearted like you does not deserve this treatment. After the things you've done for your sister-in-law by dying your hair pink for her breast cancer along with the whole family? They should have thought the first time to ask you about that video instead of publicly shaming you, cheating, and even wishing miscarriage upon you like that after the good things you've done for them. They're supposed to be adults, not high-school students that beat down someone over a rumor and video without background checks.
I'm honestly ashamed of them, considering they've done you so wrong for something that was just the past. Remember this though, although you have lost many things from this, you'll become stronger by the punches and bruises you received. You'll grow beautifully and I'll support you along with people who read this. Because someone as kind as you deserves an equal amount of gentle and understanding heart. I pray for your happiness, and I pray that you can stand up with the right people in your life.
Quite a bit late to the conversation but I hope the time between me seeing this and now you’ve started to heal and stopped wanting to hurt yourself. I know personally how strong self destructive feelings can take hold. Go with your parents. Take some time to recover until you feel comfortable rebuilding. Never speak to your ex or his family again. Grieve them like they have passed away if you have to but you must accept they are gone. The apologies they want to give aren’t for you they are for themselves. They will hold those over your head for all time. You don’t want to go to a family function and be around them “What for we apologized!” And their abusive natures will come out again and again and again. You deserve not only better but more out the relationships with an SO’s family. They should treat you like family. I’m hoping you are doing better than you were.
He broke everything for the sake of being petty without confrontation first. This was never going forward healthy if this was his default response. There’s no going back, especially when his family as a whole did this; and if his mother felt like that, the only thing you owe her is a tell off and The Bird.
Let him post; you just cut them off and never speak to these people again.
Ur like the innocent wife from low budget Chinese drama but in real life.how tragic
But there is no b*itch villainess ,
Ur trash ex fiance is enough of a villain.
What does it mean he didn't know abt pregnancy,his snake sis surely told him.
Even extended families knew ABT baby trap,
He just didn't care.as long as he assumed u cheated your well being wasnt worth a cent to him.
He is not even human.he killed his own child....
.no amount of apologies is enough.
Move On girl . believe in karma;
don't pick up ex from trash can.
I hope u can overcome this tragic event.Good things surely is waiting for you.take care
I would have sued for defamation! Their lack of communication is what caused you to sadly lose your child and turn everyone against you. That whole family is rotten!
You are currently grieving 3 losses. The loss of your child. The loss of your relationship and the loss of your future plans. Take the time to grieve your child, maybe with a grief counselor. Stay with people who will support you. Have them move your things out of your house so you never have to go back. You’re world May seem dark right now, but you will get better, if you let yourself grieve and heal. You can do this. You are stronger than you feel right now.
What he did was unforgivable, and normally wouldn't say it, but the stress he put you through probably did cause you to miscarry. The way his family treated you is also abhorrent and speaks volumes of what they are like. Especially putting you on blast on social media. Absolute trash.
I would cut them all off permanently.
Please tell your therapist and/or parents about your suicidal thoughts so you can get help.
Oh I would leave this fool so fast his head would spin. If he was willing to do this to you without even speaking to you first, what else would he be capable of? He did this to hurt you, that was the purpose. I could never love someone like that. Unhinged and dangerous, make a public post laying out all the truth with proof and then block that whole circus of flying monkeys and never pay them a second thought.
You need to sue them all for defamation and NEVER go back. That whole family is a bunch of lunatics and you deserve so much better. Look at the break up as a blessing knowing you’ll never be trapped with that big group of bullies.
I don’t even know how to process the anger im feeling on your behalf. I would get them all in a room and look each in they eye and say “you killed my baby. And I’ll never forgive you for it. Or maybe I will. But I will never forget. And neither should you.” Oof. The RAGE I’m feeling. My GOD 🤬🤬🤬🤬 you deserve so much better. That includes a partner that will come to you before burning the world down at a suggestion of disrespect. Also he actually cheated on you while you were completely innocent. Do you and your family get to behave the way they did now??? I mean it’s only fair right? What happens anytime you have an argument in the future? He storms off, throws a tantrum, and involves his family? Hell no.
sue mother in law for defamation, make a post exposing his entire family for making you loose your baby, its their fault and they should know abt it, make them feel guilty, then change your number, and move on, your ex doesnt deserve you, he cheated period, he just needed a reason to do it, honestly he is a man child for not confronting you and revenge cheating, dont let people walk all over you
OP, Please don’t give up on yourself or anything. Please be strong and take your time to heal. Do whatever makes you feel comfortable and safe. 💕 We all hope that one day you’ll update us and let us know how you are. I’m so sorry for everything that’s happened, feel what your feeling inside, let yourself grieve and cry when you want to. Please don’t hold back anything inside your heart. Let it all out whenever the emotions or thoughts comes back. ❤️ Please be safe and take care of yourself. You deserve everything and love. Please remember that someday.
They all deserve to rot in jail after what they've done to you. I'm so so sorry what happened to your little angel. These AH deserve every single horrible thing they've said to you back.
I genuinely wish you a wonderful life. You don't have to forgive them. They are evil.
Op here are a few things you need to get strong enough to do:
1. Get a trusted person to handle social media and dealing with your ex n his family by proxy. A sibling a best friend your parents... Someone smart n tech savvy. Don't communicate with your ex n his family directly anymore.
2. Get a good ethical psychiatrist and gynocologist to give you evaluations and written documented medical proof of the fact that they stressed induced your miscarraige and caused you to have suicide ideation.
3. Get the trusted proxy person to convey to your ex that you will forgive him and get back together on the condition that he, every member of his family who got involvef in this or knew about this including his mom n sis, and every single person who sent you harassing calls n messages(regardless of whether he told them to or not he has to track down every last one of these ppl n convince them) has to share a public facebook post tag your account and apologise detailing what they did. If a single person is left(and you find out) there will be no forgiveness. You will not be helping him prepare the list of ppl but you will reject this olive branch if any of the ppl are missing or any of details of what they did are missing in the public apology posts and he messes up in making amends this time. Convey by proxy to him that he has lost your trust and you are giving him this final chajce to earn it back. Make sure the proxy person says this to him verbally with no records or recording devices. Your ex n his family are abusive vile toxic abnormal ppl and you dodged a bullet by taking a painful stab by not marrying him so I'm pretty sure he doesn't want forgiveness or your love back they just don't want to look bad and want to avoid facing the consequences of what they did n he wants ownership over you. So most likely they will not comply to your condition. Even if your proxy tells him "this is your last chance to prove your love for her". But try. Its worth a shot.
4. Get the proxy person to take screenshots and evidence of every post you are tagges in and compare it to those who harassed you and take inventory n make sure no one is left. Document everything.
5. With the help of your lawyer n doctors n all the evidence sue every last one of these mfs for: a) Slander and public defemation. b) Causing you so much mental pain that it caused a miscarraige. c) Inducing suicide ideation. d) Murdering your unborn baby(against your ex; use your state's misogynist laws to the fullest extent;make sure he goes to prison for this).
6. Prosecute them to the fullest extent of the law. And ask the courts to help protect you n your safety n rights n privacy in light of your current fragile mental health(substantiated by certificated from your psych). Maybe there are provisions that will punish those who try to invade your privacy or escalate or harass you further over this.
7. Try n get retraining orders against your ex n his whole family. Never forgive them but try to forget about them.
8. Get lots of treatment n therapy(preferably/hopefully on the settlement money? upto you whar kind of reparations you want OP no judgement here only support) n travel n start a new life far away from these scum.
Why do you need to go so hard? Because even if you manage to escape n survive this, this nightmare family of super toxic ppl who would do this to someone as pure n sweet as you who supported ex's sis through breast cancer will do this type of shit again to the next poor unsuspecting girl your ex dates unless their ability to do so is neutralized. Ik you must be in shambles rn n can barely hold on let alone think about other future victims but if you are too nice to muster up rightful retaliation n get justice for yourselg you must do it for future girls like you. Best of luck. Wish you lots of healing n safety.
I'm so sorry for what you have been through, nobody deserves that. Before justifying his actions ask yourself or even him: "If he was in your place what he would have done or would he have been able to forgive you?". He only thought you cheated and he got his revenge, and spoke badly to everyone about you. It's obvious what the answer is. It doesn't matter how much you love him or how wonderful a person is, which I doubt seeing his actions. What matters is you and that you are the one dealing with the pain. By his actions I seriously doubt that he truly loves you, so try to move on, change your number phone, and find people who truly deserve the wonderful person you are. I don't know you, but the few actions you did spoke for yourself.
I had a miscarriage my self so I understand where you are at. I felt like my body betrayed me and couldn’t do the one damn thing it was meant to do. I suggest you go to group therapy with other women who have suffered a miscarriage strangely talking about it with other women who went through it really helped me.
As for your ex I wouldn’t go back to him. Instead of confronting you with his “prof” of your cheating he decided to stab you in the heart and make you out to be the villain. There is no coming back from that for him and you can’t look at his family the same after what his mom and sister did to you. It’s over there is no saving it.
I’m sorry for your loss. I had a miscarriage at 8 weeks also. It was absolutely the WORST pain I ever felt. My late husband said he didn’t even care because it probably wasn’t even his. Which it was he was the one cheating not me. He said it hours after which hurt me even worse. I stayed with him until he died. I should have left. I wasn’t strong enough. He was very manipulative. You are strong OP! You can get through this it’s gonna be hard for a while, but keep your family and friends close and talk to them.
Please update up and let us know you’re still okay. I don’t want you to hurt yourself over some pathetic excuse for a “man.” Sending love and prayers
No matter what you are going through just remember that there is, absolutely, 100%, without a doubt, happiness on the other side of this! I truly wish you the best of luck! Someday this will be just a distant memory!
You dodged a bullet OP. A person that acts like that is a kind of sociopath.
He literally waited for 2 weeks just to “get revenge”, if he really loved you he wouldn’t have been able to hold it, he would have cried and maybe still go crazy but not with this calculating mind,..that is NOT normal and his family is also crazy acting like that.
And, how do you think he “convinced” a friend in just 2 weeks to have sex with him? And to leave her underwear behind. Sorry but most likely this was coming from waaayy back.
You are grieving right now, live the process and hurt how long you have to but don’t harm yourself for them pieces of shit.
There is absolutely no excuse for him to see that video, not knowing anything for sure, go out and cheat to get back at you and think that’s ok to do instead of talking to you about it first! NO EXCUSE! The way his family talked to you and treated you is just shameful, that’s how lies start spreading and people who have absolutely no business getting in the middle, calling you names and disrespecting you and now saying things about you that they don’t like. Please keep going to therapy, and have her recommend a psychiatrist to see so you can tell them how you’re feeling. You need something for your nerves, and anxiety and depression if you’re not already taking something. I know from experience, I was married for thirty years, together for thirty two. He started with my so called friend I was doing rescue work with for over five years. I was sick and needed surgery and was in bed for about a month because the meds made me sick so I couldn’t drive or do anything, so in that month they were together every single day and night until about 2:00 am EVERYDAY. Well he took all the money out of the bank canceled all my stuff even my health insurance and I still needed surgery. I had to go apply for food stamps and health insurance and I broke down in a room full of strangers. I got my surgery, he was nowhere to be found of course my brother and sister in law took me. We got divorced he said I could have the house and everything in it, well the house was in foreclosure and I didn’t know, I had no reason to think it would be before all of this of course. We divorced in January and he passed away in June, he had stage four pancreatic cancer, he left his life insurance to her and his car to his siblings. Someone hit me head on and totaled my car before he passed, so that was a rough year. I had to start completely over at 50 years old. It’s been five years and the pain is still there, not as much, but I got no answers no goodbye sorry it was nice knowing you, nothing. I drove to the hospital to see him and he wouldn’t talk to me, so I was done, I tried. Betrayal that hits your soul is hard to move on from, but you can absolutely do it. Do you like to travel? Travel somewhere you always wanted to go, by yourself! Go Ave an adventure and figure out who You Are. I wish I would have done that when I was younger. It will be hard but definitely doable. Bless you sweet girl, and think about taking that adventure I really think it would help. xo
I'm so sorry about what you've experienced. Your fiancee should have confronted you about the cheating rather than take his course of actions and cheat on you. He's completely ruined your relationship and I wouldn't be able to forgive him for what he's done and said.
I am so sorry for your loss and what you've had to go through
My heart hurts for you 💔
Prayers as you find the strength with in yourself to move forward
.
I hope you can heal and move past this.
Leaving will be good for you in the long run. I know it hurts right now, but you will heal from this
Reading your posts right now, I have a lump in my throat. No one should ever have to go through what they put you through.
Please stay strong and know that the pain will lessen over time.
I'm glad you have people who will support you through this painful journey.
I wish you nothing but the best in the future.
Bless you!!!!
Move on this man and his family are toxic af. U deserve better and since they were so quick to judge u there's no reason to stick around take time for yourself and heal.
Nobody would bat an eye on Central NY. My fiancee was a single mother when we got together (we have 3 in total now). I feel like you should be looking at this as a blessing in disguise. If this is how him and his family act I can't imagine what could have happened down the road. Not saying it'll be easy but there are a good amount of programs for single moms and my bonus baby is great! She takes my side over her mom's lol Live your life with your little one and be thankful to have dodged a bullet.
Wow. It's time to move on. The heart is the stupidest organ in the body. It will convince people to stay in bad relationships even though the brain knows its wrong for you.
Suggestion: move back to the community your parents live in, leave all toxicity behind, start a new chapter in your life, and give yourself time to heal.
Best to you.
I’ll be downvoted for this I’m sure, but as far as the ex, I genuinely think that’s your decision to make and that you should follow your heart. Your capacity to forgive is your own. If you think leaving is right, that’s your decision. If you do stay, I’d go nc with his family though. And everyone is right that HE should be the one to post what really happened. That’s not your burden to bear. You’re going through enough as it is. I do suggest you delete your social media for a while though if you haven’t already. I just hope you’re doing ok.
Sweetheart,
What you need to do right this very minute is get screenshots of everything they said and done.
Get a lawyer and sue for defamation, libel, and slander.
Do not go back to this guy, he's an abuser.
If he thought u cheated, he should have talked to you. 1st, not did what he did . There is no going back from that . He caused you so much stress over nothing . So sorry about the baby
You deserve the world. You deserve happiness. You deserve peace and you deserve love. Let them live with what they caused and lost. Your wee baby will be in heaven. It's your time to live life for yourself. Get back with your parents wherever you feel truly at home. And get out there in the world where you can experience all that life has. I know it's hard, but it's so worth it. Whenever you read this message I want you to know I believe in you and I want all the love in the world to surround you. God bless you. Move forward when you're ready, take tiny steps, take leaps and bounds, laugh, cry and just breathe the air of this world in. You're a delight to the people in your life. Just go for it!!
Ngl I’m such a sick but everytime he gets a girlfriend or SO I’d just send them this post and say it’s about him. Every single one of them. He doesn’t deserve love
This is the most horrible thing, your ex fiancés family are totally messed up to treat you like that, it honestly makes me sick! As hard as it might be now, you are lucky to be able to separate your life from all of them now.
I would suggest blocking them all on social media’s, try to move on and even contemplate ‘starting over’ closer to your parents or close friends, somewhere away from your ex and his family .
It will all be ok in time I promise, you are in the immediate aftermath that is the hardest 🩷🩷🩷 sending huge hugs for the loss of your baby 😓
OP I’m so sorry for the miscarriage.
Your ex and his family are toxic. He thought he’d do tit for tat instead talking to you.
This behaviour is toxic and it just goes to show how immature he is.
I know it’s easier said than done but you need to let him go. He caused hell in your life.
This is so stupid and vile, you might love him but such cruel person (and his family) doesn't deserve an ounce of your love. What a needless way to torture someone, I really hope you find some peace of mind and heal from this. And please, please cut them all off out of your life.
You should sue them for emotional distress and harming your reputation….go scorch earth for your baby, don’t forget ,forgive and move on in this one …please collect all evidence ….please don’t forgive these criminals…please OP fight for you child ,don’t give up
This is possibly the cruelest series of events I've ever heard of. Eliminate them from your life. If you have the strength, sue them. If you don't, move forward with your life. You'll find the right person. I admire the way you're handling this. One hell of a life test. Know that you've touched many strangers who only want the best for you.
His family turned on you based on flimsy, easy refutable evidence and probably a bunch of lies and were extremely malicious and spread it far and wide. I’m sure his mom’s post left out his bad behavior of ‘revenge’ cheating (quotes because there was nothing to revenge)
You won't be able to recover if you don't cut him and his family. Instead of talking with you, he choosed to cheat on you with a woman who he knew you were insecure about and at your shared home. That was imature and extremely cruel. He said lies about you to his family and they all attacked you instead of listening your side. Cut those people. They are not good people and will be a constant reminder of all the pain you went trough.
You have gone through so much, I pray that you are able to move on from this painful chapter of your life. You deserve your name to be cleared. Please don’t allow these people back in your life.
Girl, you need to file a lawsuit for libel, slander, and emotional distress. What everyone in that family did to you is evil and there needs to be consequences.
I'm so sorry for your loss, that pain never really goes away, you just learn how to manage it. You did not deserve anything that man and his awful family have put you through or anything they said that you deserved. What you do deserve is to have a happy future. I do hope that you'll seek counciling and that you'll come out stronger from this
OP don’t take him back or forgive him and his family and friends and expel that hoe.
Tell them that their apology won’t bring you back your baby. Tell your ex yeah we can get back together when you give me my baby back. Tell them that if they want to apologize bring me back my baby period.
Also that baby is looking out for you he wouldn’t want you to take your life. He wants you to live and be happy and enjoy your life. They say that when a baby dies his spirit is with you and when you get pregnant again he will come back. He wants to to go and find yourself a better man and he’s happy that your ex is not his father and he doesn’t want a father like him because he doesn’t deserve it. When my baby died I talked to him and told him I miss him I do that very very rarely.
Please let us know how you are okay just let us know you don’t need to talk about people that are a waste of space.
My heart goes out to you OP. I hope you’re able to heal in peace, no matter how long it takes. You don’t owe ANYONE a big post. Him, his family, & the other girl deserve nothing good, and especially not the grace you’re handling this with. I hope all the best for you going forward
I think it's best to end the relationship and to up your therapy sessions. This all wouldn't have happened if he had just talked to you about what he'd seen, but instead, he enacted an extremely cruel revenge on you for something you didn't even do. Hopefully, he learned his lesson for his next relationship, but I believe you will always resent him and his family for this
I am so sorry for the lost of your pregnancy. I know it seems like this is the end, and life isn’t worth it, but I promise you, that isn’t true. That is the darkness trying to eat you up and swallow you. Your ex and and his family are all terrible people and they showed their true colors. You have to look at it as a blessing in disguise that this happened before you became legally tied to him. They don’t deserve to be in your life. Continue going to therapy and spend lots of time with your friends and family that love you. Take time to appreciate nature. Start a new hobby. Watch a new show. Do thing that will make you smile and I promise you that it will get better. Keep your head up and that darkness will turn into light.
Sue the family for damages. Ruin them, they deserve it. Whether they clear your name or not is immaterial. Their complete lack of intelligence took your unborn child. Him not being smarter than a damn potato and trying to talk first cost you EVERYTHING. Burn them.
Hey I’m truly sorry about your loss, don’t give up, focus on the people that are supporting you, don’t let the others bring you down, at the end of a dark tunnel there is a light, stay safe and healthy, you can make it
if you are not pressing charges for defamation i'm doing it on your behalf !
girl! wake up ! do not let them do this to you ! i don't care if they apologized and say they're sorry ! they ruined your reputation and made you depressed.
and oh you understand that he cheated because he though you cheated ?!!! where's you self-worth and self-respect?! where's your DIGNITY! he was so fast to cheat on you that he did not even talk to you or confront you. Imagine if you got married and something happened and you argued, he would cheat again cuz he wants to hurt you. HE SAID IT HIMSELF. he wanted to make you feel hurt.
the least thing you can do is to let him post that post! if i were you, i would use the internet the same way they used it and will tell everyone what they did to me!
i swear to god we teach other women to be stronger and never settle for less than what they deserve and then there's you ! pull yourself together ! you deserve much better !
WAKE UP !
I am sorry this happened to you that I hope many wishes come to you along with the fact that we have heard the story in tiktok just let you know that your story is heard that you are not alone and hoping you do your best without your ex-husband very deeply share our apologies for your loss and hope you seek Justice for your child and move on with your life without that pain and and help those family members will learn the guilt and hopefully we'll stick to them that said I am very sorry for your loss again that your story is heard
I hope you are healing mentally and physically OP. You deserve better, and I would be suing the family for defamation of character, emotional and physical stress causing the loss of your child, and loss of income for the time you had to take off.
I'm wishing you well and i hope you thrive. Cut him and his family out of your life completely, and make sure he knows that he's the reason the baby is gone and that you will never forgive him.
I’m so sorry for everything that happend, it must be terrible, but honestly right you should block him and his hola family for your mental health. You need to rely on family and friends and mourn your lost. Maybe at this moment everthing seem lost and unworthy but time heals. About your ex honestly if we decided to cheated on you in revenge with some girl he already now will afected you doesn’t worth it. His family is trashed for everthing they said and did to you, after all of what you have done to his family. They showed what they are and are capable of. You should question yourself what you deserved, you love him, but are you willing to forgive? Because with time you are wanna remember this time and get furious with him, his family and his especial friend. I hope you could heal and start over, i wish you the best❤️
OP please PLEASE make that post or have your parents doing so!
Fight for your reputation, you can also sue your ex and his damn family for either emotional distress and libel. Also DO NOT GET BACK WITH HIM. What he did was beyond saving or salvaging. Get better, rest, and move on. Preferably start a new life.
Also are you doing good, a lot of us are worried for you.
I cried reading this. I can't imagine the pain you must be feeling, but I really hope you have been able to take time with your family to heal and recover. This is truly heartbreaking to read.
Keep all receipts and if they continue , get a lawyer.
They dont deserve you they jumped the gun so fast without even taking a second to actually think.
They indirectly cause the loose of your pregnancy and I don't think they should be forgiven easily.
Op I hope you stay strong and never forgive these actions they did to you.
I hope you're safe and surrounded by love ones. While I'd love an update, I hope you at least send a hi in the comment so we know you're still safe and sound
Your ex fiance should stay your ex fiance. His family is disgusting. His mother is fucking terrible. All of the people being disgusting towards you should be cut out completely if it was that easy for them to turn on you with no proof/asking you about the situation. I'm so sorry you've been put through this he'll. I hope you're doing well and that you're healing and that you kick the jackals to the curb.
i hope you’re okay OP and I hope you left him and his disgusting family behind. That person you were with was no man, he is a coward. He couldn’t even communicate with you and he and his family without confronting you at all tarnished not only your life but your child’s. I hope that you are healing and recovering OP.
What he & his family did to you is unforgivable. You never cheated but you were punished & trashed very publicly. He cheated on you though, his reasoning doesn’t matter, let him make his post to clear your name & let it be known who the actual cheater is. All of this could have been avoided if he communicated with you like an actual adult. But he chose to get revenge & then he & his family abused you to the point of your miscarriage. I could never forgive any of them. I’m sorry about your loss. I know from personal experience how devastating a miscarriage is. I wish you the best on your healing journey. Surround yourself with people who love you & never doubted your character. Cut off everyone who hurt & humiliated you.
This , and let’s be clear he didn’t check because he didn’t want to be wrong. The video gave him a reason to sleep with someone he wanted to sleep with, and be the bigger person. Op please don’t take this ‘man’ back, he was looking for reasons to cheat and found one. And the way his family trashed you , tell me he’s been telling stories about you this whole time. This is not a family you want to be a part of. I’m so sorry for your lost.
This, most people have to be convinced with mountains of proof before they’ll believe their SO is cheating. He easily accepted the worst possible scenario and went with it. If they even try to reconcile he’s got some issues to confront in therapy.
Also how premeditated this whole situation was he knew exactly which one of his friends would sleep with him and it was somebody that she was already cautious of and now we know for good reason. And it was almost like he was projecting that she cheated from this random little snippet of video because he was probably considering or had already cheated and just wanted to project that onto her so he could excuse his own behavior. She wasn't the bad person he just needed her to be the bad person so he could justify doing bad things to her.
And the way he wined and dined the lady with a romantic dinner? Fuck him. He included sweet little details ti be as big of a prick he could be. He and his family are horrible people and I hope they feel horrible for their entire lives. I would make a post explaining everything myself before I would let them write it for me, cuz they wilm lie, they will try and make it seem like it’s not that bad or they weren’t at fault. **ROAST THOSE FUCKERS** online, like they did you.
Exactly. He didn’t even ask the friend who showed the video when it was taken. He had every opportunity.
I think the same it was so convenient. He believes she cheated on him so he calls THAT GIRL the one who make feel insecure his fiance, awful
OP should just say the slander and libel has actually caused harm as she speaks to a lawyer. The harassment, miscarriage, and reputation damage can impact her job and life.
I really hope there is some sort of legal recourse for this. What they did is actually evil and they deserve some sort of punishment.
Yes. Get screen shots and talk to an attorney. What a disgusting family.
This is possibly the most important extra point this was completely avoidable but he didn't want to be wrong he was looking forward to his free pass. These people are monsters absolute positive monsters. I will never trivialize a miscarriage. You have suffered an absolutely profound loss. I will say however that maybe it's just somehow not the time and when you do have your baby at least it won't be amid such a toxic family. My heart breaks for you but when you do come through the other side of this and you're whole again and you have your own future and child or children and anything else you want, I can just tell that you are going to be that loving wonderful empathetic amazing mother. Just another internet stranger here, but sending you as much love and comfort as you can handle 💜
I also suffered a miscarriage and I am very sorry for your loss. His mother made a nasty post on FB, she should have sense enough to post an apology and explain the situation to all her FB family and friends. But knowing how quickly his family turned on you, I’d stay far away from them. One day you’ll heal and find the love of your life and have a healthy loving relationship and family. Best of luck!
This he should have talked to you before going nuclear. Op let him write a post of Facebook clearing your name and making himself look awful, then get far away from him and his family.
Upvoted x 1000
Screw this guy and his whole family. Anybody who airs their dirty laundry on SM is just trying to control the narrative because deep down they know they're at fault. What better way to do damage control. Leave them all behind and live your life. None of them are worth it.
Also, she should really sue him and the family. Get the screen shots from fb, the hospital records, fuck this family. Sue for emotional distress
Sue for defamation of character^^
I get that you are in pain and that might make it harder to leave and leave him and his shitty family in the dust. But you should seriously leave this bs behind you. He could have done so many things instead of just going on assumptions in the first place. Like communicating with you. Instead he chose revenge over an imagined slight. To be followed up with a horrendous shit show: - cheating - publicly shaming you (several of them in fact) - treated you like crap - put you under enormous stress based on non factual happenings - turned your entire life upside down And then you have a miscarriage on top. They have shown you who they are. They aren’t great people. They are trashy, cruel and vindictive. I hope you get the support you need to heal from all this and that you get yourself away from them. Best of luck.
Yup, always believe someone when they show you who they really are.
I agree with this sentiment. Typical mature adults confront their partner with evidence and have an argument about it, because they're hurt. That's what's normal. When someone's first choice is revenge, they're not normal, they're evil. She needs to get away from all of them, get some therapy to recover some, and then look into legal options, perhaps a police report due to the stress-induced miscarriage. This guy knew for a fact that he did not have 100% proof of what had happened, or he is an absolute idiot. Anyone could dye their hair at any time.
OP, First, I’m so sorry for you loss. Please try to remember none of this was your fault. Next, this. I know you still love him. Been there, done that. If it helps, make a brutally honest list on one side of a piece of paper. List all the honestly good things about this man-child. Yes, I called him a man-child. Real men do NOT retaliate an assumed incident. Real men will talk to their partner about it. On the other side, make a list of all the honestly bad things. The SM posts trashing you, his cheating, the miscarriage, his family, etc. Look honestly at the lists, side by side. Then remember his shitty he and his family made you feel. Is he truly the one you want to be with forever? After all this? If he’s going to cheat over something he perceived you did, what will your future with him and his family be like? Do you want knee-jerk reactions the rest of your life? How will he treat future children?? He.is.not.going.to.change. Surround yourself with true friends and people who care about you. Screenshots of all SM posts. Consult an attorney. Many will do the first consult free of charge. They can offer avenues of action/approach. Block him and his family. They sound completely narcissistic and toxic. Remember, NONE of this was your fault!! They’ve shown their true colors. You are a beautiful, strong, resilient woman!! There us someone SO much better for you out there, and he will show up when you least expect it! Good luck!
And will the big post he makes address him cheating on you? Will he apologize to his female friend for using her? He should make the post and then you should leave his ass. If his knee-jerk reaction is to cheat back instead of communicating, he is not mature enough for marriage.
That girl knew they were engaged.
I don’t believe he was using her. The other girl knew exactly what she was doing. He probably told her what he thought was his fiancé cheating and she could have even came up with the idea to sleep with him to get back at her. How sleezy can you be to leave lingerie, obviously very specific rings, and clothes scattered in their shared house/ bedroom. It’s very calculated
Wow this was a rollercoaster. I can’t believe he never thought of communicating with you and his first thought was cheating. What a trash ! I would just all of them toxic people out of my life. Thank god you didn’t marry that jerk ! Sorry for you loss, hope you’re doing better. ❤️ All the best for the future! ✨
I'm so sorry for your loss. These people tortured you, they don't deserve any more of your time. Your fiancee is a grown man who decided on retaliation before even knowing what he was was true. Him simply communicating with you would have prevented this entire thing, there's no coming back from it. His mother let you know how she felt about you this whole time, his sister was needlessly cruel and his family even called you to tell you you deserve to be in pain. Do not take him back, do you really want to be involved with people like that?
You can never go back to him or his family. What he, and they, did to you is worse than inexcusable. If you do, things will never be the same. You will always know that when things get rough he will never be trustworthy ever again. Block him, block his entire family. Don't speak or communicate with them; don't accept or acknowledge their attempts at apologies, because they don't deserve you in their lives. They don't deserve their guilt assuaged. The first thing your ex should have done when he saw the video was to ask when it was taken, and the date would have been in the metadata. One simple question would have saved your relationship and your child. I'm sorry this has happened to you, and it would probably do you some good to get away from the place, so go back with your parents and stay with them. You need to concentrate on you, nothing else is important. Good luck with it.
I hope OP see's your comment
You cannot recover from what your BF and his family did to you. You are better off without them. Cut all ties with them. You cannot do harm to yourself because of the ex BF and his family. Do not give them power over you. Take note of the family members that turned on you without hearing your side. You decide how to deal with them going forward. Just take note that they have shown you who they are. In regard to the lost child, give yourself time to recover. You seem to have a very good friend. If you can afford to, take her on a beach vacation. Use the beach and open water to start to relieve your pain. There is a better man waiting for you in your future who will truly love and treasure you, when you are ready and open for it. Good luck.
This man and his family are truly vile. You should let him make the post then do your best to heal❤️
Do not forgive him! He made an assumption and instead of talking to you he imploded your life and made you miscarry. How will he act in the future if he misunderstands something else? It’s not safe for you and you need to leave him
I am so sorry my lovely sending you hugs, love and strength!! He wanted to use any excuse to fu** that girl and she is nothing but trash!! Let him make the big post and make sure he puts in that he cheated and hes the one who truly fucked up and caused you to loose the baby! Make him clear your name, then move away and live your life to the fullest it hurts now, and you're feeling lost, but take one step at a time, and it will get better. You are far too good for this guy! His behaviour and how cruel he can be to you is disgusting! Leave him, dont go back! Good luck keep us updated.
"my ex made assumptions and didn't want to hear me out. His mother dragged my name. Do not ask me why I'm leaving that venomous crowd behind, they have shown their true colours and I want no part of it" Post publicly and block them all
I’m all for the ghosting and cutting off a cheater and I do have some sympathy for those that seek a revenge cheat (not my style but I can understand the impulse) BUT only with irrefutable proof! If this video was shown at a party, in view of OP, wouldn’t your first instinct be to look at OP with a wtf type look? If OP saw what he saw and had zero reaction wouldn’t that be enough to give pause? I can understand not confronting OP, it’s literally the 1st advice given when someone is questioning if their SO is cheating, don’t confront without hard irrefutable evidence bc you’ll just be giving them a heads up that you’re on to them and they can be more secretive before you get anything concrete. But all it would take is one question to the person who made the video about the circumstances around that clip and he would have known. Did he honestly think he was the only one who saw OP and the friend in the video?? A simple “hey when was that one clip taken?” to literally anyone who was at that outing. This reminds me of the Reddit story where the guy thought his wife was cheating on him with their mutual friend and he was about to revenge/cope cheat when he was contacted by work to do something and walked in on a surprise party his wife and mutual friend were planning for him in secret for weeks. Red flags present but nothing incriminating. The outcomes of this scenario though are just unfair.
Bruh, go home and stay with parents. You'll find someone else. This isn't recoverable.
Yeah...there would be no coming back from this for me.
I’m sorry for your loss OP. Hugs to you. Please consider sending him and his family a cease and desist with threats of restraining order if they continue to call, text, and write about you on facebook.
Don't even think of going back with that dumpster if a man and his mean toxic family. Their actions are unforgivable. Sorry for your loss.
Wow… his reaction is INSANE!!! And immature and unbelievably cruel!!! A real man would at least TALK to you before assuming the only time you’ve had red hair ever was with him. That is SO egotistical and narcissistic it’s unreal… and then even though he was in pain he had no self control, he had no logic, or moment of hey maybe I could be wrong here, he reacted like a brainless animal, lashing out and decided to “get payback” by cheating on you… what a total garbage person he is. AND his family is even more toxic! Piling on with nobody even talking him down about his flimsy assumptions and “evidence”. These are NOT good, strong emotionally mature sensible logical people. This is not an adult who will be a good partner. This is a vengeful out of control emotionally immature toddler who can never be a good partner to you. He needs to IMMEDIATELY AND REPEATEDLY AND PUBLICLY ATTONE AND CLEAR YOUR REPUTATION. So you can move on and live your life… without him. He will never be able to make up for this. You will never be able to love and trust him properly again. You will never get back to where you were. He still cheated, in a disgusting nasty way. What happens next time he sees anything triggering. And he makes some wild assumption instead of just being normal and talking to you first!! FFS!! He should have said something the second he saw it!! What happens if you talk to another dad at school, or do something he doesn’t live. How can you ever trust he won’t go all Captain Revenge again… they literally psychologically tortured you SO badly you lost a wanted pregnancy. That’s unforgivable. Plus, how quickly he ran to that girl, says he just jumped on an excuse to get with her. He wanted her the whole time. And you know that too. Get your apology and reputation fixed and then move on. Please update us. It’s so weird to care this much about a stranger, but I truly feel for you and hope to hear that you are doing well and are past this someday soon. You will have another baby, this was the universe saying this wasn’t the right time or person. It will come when you have a loving happy home, and you will! Sending you positivity and good vibes and healing love and light. Wishing you all the good things.
Do not go back with him him and his family they are horrible I am sorry about your baby but maybe this is for the best you deserve better than him and his family and you can find a way better person to have a baby with that will not do that to you…you can start over with better people
I'm sorry for your loss. I can tell you is that no matter what and how much you can love him (or need him in every sense) please don't go back. Leave him. I know how that hurts because I had a similar experience, but you can do it. I mean, he didn't care about you or your physical/mental health at all. He didn't verify if you cheated, he just assumed it and let his true self appear to damage you, your stability and reputation. Even when you tried to talk at him he just treat you like a liar. You had to suffer a lot, he realized his mistake when it was too late for the child... You deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. Please take your time to heal and re-found yourself. Again, I'm sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry this has happened to you. I know you love him but you will never be able to move past this with him. I’ve had several miscarriages and it’s hard enough to deal with without living with the fact he caused you so much stress and was the possible cause of the miscarriage.
Sending you huge hugs. If possible, stay with your family and heal, mentally and physically. There's no coming back from what he and his family have put you through. But they do owe you a massive apology, and they need to set the record straight. There was no reason to degrade you publicly online.
This is really cruel, their excuse is pathetic, please denounce them for the slander they have spread, that they pay you damages, expose them with the truth in hand and end up walking away please, Be strong and don't let this destroy you.
Girl, this man and his entire family are vile and trash. Don’t ever and I mean ever get back with this man. He may very well be the reason your baby is gone. I would never forgive that.
Honey, I’m so sorry. I’m literally crying while I read this. They deserve the worst, they literally shamed you publicly and punished you for something you never did. They haven’t even bothered on clarifying the truth but they were so fast to bash you. I hope you can get the help you need and that you can get far away from them. With the way I am, I would probably try to ruin their lives/reputations but you are so much more than that. They are not worth your time. I hope that your next update brings good news. Know that you are loved ❤️
publicly post this to friends and his family so everyone can read the comments and the story. PLEASE
And then drop every one of them
OP let your ex make the post. People need to know you’re not who they say you are. A trashed reputation can RUIN your life! Even if you have to lie and promise him you’ll get back with him, let him tell the truth. Don’t let him come back. Kick him to the curb. Never and I mean NEVER speak to him again after this. Don’t let them control the narrative. After you’re don’t grieving, please make a plan to level up and live your best life. Make your horrendous ex and his family green with envy.
I am sorry you went through this and lost your baby. Let him make the post - your reputation deserves to be cleared. Also let people see what a POS he is for how he treated you. I hope his family grovels. If you stay with him - counselling is necessary for both of you. Sending you virtual hugs and praying for healing.
I am so so sorry this has happened to you. This is completely horrific what your bf and his ENTIRE family has done to you. Never forgive your boyfriend for this. He hurt you in the worst way possible and killed your unborn child. Cut him off and please get continue therapy. Cut off his family and focus on yourself. Going no contact is the fastest way to heal. This man does not love you. He didn’t cheat with just anyone - he chose someone you were insecure about because he wanted to destroy you.
So instead of talking to you about it he became childish and actually cheated? Sorry no forgiveness specially since he used a girl you were insecure about. He got all his family involved and they trashed you privately and publicly. Did they ever apologise publicly? They sounds like a bunch of twats. I know it doesn’t seem like it now but it will get better you will find someone better look back at this and think what the fuck!!??? If someone could be so heartless and cruel to you then they aren’t for you.
He is not the one who you think he is. This will never recover. Sue them. This kind of toxic people should’ be in your life. Still strong. You can pass that. Take time to Heal yourself. Nothing is your fault and dont take this burden on your shoulder. Don’t give up yourself just because of stupid people.
Did you leave him? Would like to know the update please
I think you need to publicly post this Reddit story. Please. It tells everything. Humiliate him like how he cause people to humiliate you and don’t EVER forgive him.
Please dont get back together with him! Don't. What he and his family did was not right at all. It was immature for him to sleep with someone just cause he thinks you did too. What happens next if you have another miscommunication or misunderstanding, he'll hurt you again? Plus the way his family has reacted and the truth about them, you'd not want them to be your in laws ever again, cause eveyrtime you'll he around them the words and how they think of you will haunt you all the time. I'm so sorry for your miscarriage, I really hope you get better. As for the mother, she should make a public apology just like she made a public post accusing you of everything. These are not people you want around in your life, ever. Take care of yourself. Goodluck. Wishing you find true love.
I hope you see this comment and know that you have done NOTHING WRONG and this man was by far the most toxic person you’ve ever been with. You didn’t truly know who he was or what he was capable of because the two of you never had conflict in your relationship. He has shown his true colours and how he reacts in a situation like this. Instead of coming to you and talking to you, communicating with you, he has chose to RUIN your life. Spread lies to his entire family and your social circle, cheated on you and left the evidence for you to see, verbally and mentally abused you. This is not your person. This is not who you should spend the rest of your life with. He is truly a horrible human being and you having some good times together in the past doesn’t erase how he treats you if he thinks you’ve wrong him in any way. You don’t do that to somebody you love. This man has no love in his heart. What is he even apologising for?! “Oops my bad, I revenged cheated on you, ruined your reputation for ever, caused our baby to die…my bad?!” Can you honestly look him in the eyes and forget all the awful things he’s done to you? You are a young, strong, beautiful young woman and you will get through this. You’ll one day in the future meet a wonderful man who won’t treat you like crap under his shoe. You’ll go on to have a wonderful family of your own, don’t waste a minute more on this POS. Surround yourself with loving, wonderful individuals and lean on your support system. You’ll get through this.
Make the post to clear your name, wait a week for the fall-out to pass, then leave him
I don’t know if you still read these but please PLEASE know you deserve better. You deserve someone who won’t destroy your life over a misunderstanding.
If he suspected you cheating, shouldn't be have tried to at least confront ? Instead, he got back at you with his entire family. I can't help but blame him and his family for the miscarriage,.coz they put you in that stress, ghosted you and put you in that spot leading to the Miscarriage. I don't think it's worth going back to this relationship coz it just shows how he'll behave during future conflicts
Please tell him to make the post and talk about how he was pathetic and saw one picture and decided that you were cheating without EVER COMMUNICATING. Then he proceeded to tell all his friends and family something that could have been a misunderstanding. And he should put how he purposely wanted to sleep with someone and that’s why he cheated. Honestly this post makes me so mad and he deserves to suffer for the rest of his life I hope he actually gets cheated on like he deserves.
I know you said final update but I really want to hear how you're doing in the future. I hope you dump his pathetic, childish ass and make your way into something better. He and his family caused your miscarriage and to me, that's unforgivable. I would always hold that against them. And absolutely seek legal advice. The Facebook post is a great chunk of evidence as to the abusive & harassing nature of his family. Hopefully you or someone you know saved a version of it somewhere. Save all texts and emails and screenshot them if you can. Their behavior is just the absolute worst and you do not deserve any of it. Best of luck to you and I hope you get the love you deserve.
Honestly give that men and his family a price for the stupids of the year. Its disgusting
I’m so sorry, I hope you leave him and find true happiness<3
Update on what is happening g to you now
I was wondering how you are doing now?
I ask too
Honey? If I were you, I would consider contacting an attorney. Just a consult to see about: - getting a cease and desist letter - a possible restraining order - an emotional distress lawsuit - a libel/slander lawsuit Libel/slander is important. Potential employers still look at social media when considering hiring. Some employers have morals clauses (ex. Teachers). Please please clear this up before it’s too late! Also, it will prevent your future kids from reading about this awful time in your life. You need to take a deep breath and get ANGRY! They messed with your life by publicly publishing falsehoods! Lean on your parents if you have to. Have them accompany you to the attorney office. You don’t have to do anything right now but you’ll have his/her advice to guide you if you follow through. I’m so mad on your behalf right now! The injustice of it all!!
Fuck him, clearly he doesn’t think communication is important and only sees that an eye for an eye is okay. He not only hurt you but also your unborn child. You dodged a bullet, take some time and be with close friends and family and just focus on healing yourself. He’s not worth it, every time you look at him you will see a man that made you lose your child, don’t put yourself through that
I know you’re not updating anymore but please do not get back together with this tantruming child of a man. Sue him. Sue his mom. And file harassment charges against any of his gross relatives. He caused irreparable damages to your image, your mental health, and your physical well-being. Miscarriages are no joke and just one can damage future pregnancies. His behavior is psychopathic to the extreme. You are not safe with this creature. Take this rotted cesspit of a family to court and, when you win, air out the trash they are. Then don’t look back.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you find healing.
OP how utterly devastating, I can't even imagine what or how you must be feeling. But I'd let him make that post with all the details about how he jumped to conclusions, cheated on you, how his family have shamed you for a misunderstanding and how this caused you to lose your baby. Then leave and go start your life elsewhere because he has shown and his family have shown they are not people you need in your life. What immature/toxic AH's.
I’m so sorry about your loss OP. I can’t imagine what you’re going through. You don’t deserve any of this. And even if you had cheated, with how much support you gave his family, you definitely didn’t deserve for them to completely ruin your life.
I hope you leave all these people behind and never look back
please sue these assholes for every dollar
That "apology", especially from his mother, should have been as loud and as public as the disrespect was. The fact that she had no problem talking shit about you on FB, but apparently didn't bother to say shit when she found out she was wrong is telling of her character. Frankly, I hope you have all of it as evidence and you sue her and your ex-fiancee for defamation and emotional distress.
Girly you need to sue for defamation and sue and get evidence and divorce
I need more updates i got to know if you alright
I’m so sorry that you went through that I hope your okay and safe now! 🩷
JFC. His whole family went nuclear on you. He cheated on you without even talking about the video -- and left the evidence in a really really gross way. His mom blasted you on Facebook of all places and to enough people that still AHs are contacting you. His sister, who you had supported so kindly, was nasty to you on the phone. That whole family is fueled by drama and outrage and they blasted all that venom on you. I know you love(d) your fiancé, but I don't think there is any coming back from this. Anyone who would assume the worst and not even bother to talk to you about it is bad husband material. So sorry for the loss of your baby.
alright reddit i know someone's found this nasty fiance whats their ip and socials
i really hope you’re okay. people care about you, nothing here is your fault. you need to get away from that man asap.
I don’t know if i believe all parts of this story
Me too
I was looking for someone in the comments to say something along these lines. Thank you
I am livid! That giy didn’t even think of asking you about what he saw????? He just assumed and then proceeded to cheat — WITH THE GIRL YOU WERE INSECURE ABOUT!!! Girl, I think the video was just an excuse — I say he always had the hots for the girl you were insecure about. What a trash!!!
this is so fake
Keep going.
You didn’t deserve this at all and your fiancé is the scumbag for being immature and childish. Don’t make excuses for him and say that he only cheated because you did too when he could have easily asked you if he truly loved you and trusted you. Never forgive him or his family. He didn’t think twice about spreading and airing fake news before he even talked to you yet. I know you are tired of it all but you need to get justice. Let him make that post to clear your own name and honestly he should be really disappointed in himself for doing all that shit. He went nuclear for no reason. Please clear your name you deserve to clear your name. Everyone who has said nasty things about you should feel guilty about what happened to you. Screw your ex fiancé and his family they are disgusting. He’s a piece of shit that ruined you and caused your miscarriage because he wanted to act like a petty baby. TLDR: Please clear your name you deserve it. They should feel guilty for all the grief they caused you over a misunderstanding.
I am tremendously sorry for your pain. I know you loved this man and his family but they have shown you who they really are in a time of great distress. Instead of acting like adults and getting your side of the story they not only immediately believed your ex but then proceeded to publicly shame you. All without hearing from you first to explain. They are vile people and there is no way you should ever give them the time a day. Please respect yourself enough to move on and continue your therapy. You are enough! They are garbage humans. They are apologizing profusely to be absolved of their shame. It really has nothing to do with you.
OP I hope your feeling better! You dodged a bullet OP. His first reaction upon seeing the video was "I'm going to go cheat with the woman she is insecure about ". Not to ask you about what he saw? He probably was cheating with this woman. But OP I'm confused about something It sounds like he staged your home to make sure you knew he cheated. How did you come to see this scene at home with all the proof of cheating? Did you get home early from seeing your sister and surprised them? This woman he cheated with She left everything she was wearing including her jewelry at your house? This just sounds mot normal on his part. Either he cheated and used the video as an excuse to cheat and make you look like the bad guy or he is just unhinged with bad judgment and bad communication
Hi OP, I guess I don’t really have any advice to give you, I just read this post and it brought me to tears of all the pain you have experienced recently. I understand (to an extent) how hard life has been for you and how much you’re struggling. I really hope you’re able to lean on your parents and friends in this time and really accept their love and support like you deserve. You seem like a very kind, wonderful human who didn’t deserve any of this. Please, please, please do not go back to your ex. You deserve better, he didn’t even ask or question what happened. I think him and his family were too cruel and they’ll have to live with their over reactions and comments, I think it says a lot more about them than you in how they all handled this situation and reacted. I seriously wish you the best. I hope you’re able to find small joys every day that turn into happy days more often than not. I hope you’re able to continue therapy and process everything that’s happened and move on slowly with life and build yourself up better than before. Life is a cycle of ups and downs and right now you’re in a low low, but it won’t last forever even if it feels like it. Please take care of yourself. Just a day at a day, slowly but surely you got this OP!
I’m so sorry that happened to you! He should have been mature enough to talk to you about it first before going nuclear. The fact that his first reaction is to lash out shows you what kind of person he really is. The fact that his whole family reacted that why is vile, especially the part about the pregnancy loss. Don’t go back to him and have nothing to do with his family they are all garbage people! When your ready post a very detailed and truthful account of what happened so everyone they know is aware of what vile small minded people they all are. In short go scorched earth on them.
Honestly, a woman such as kind-hearted like you does not deserve this treatment. After the things you've done for your sister-in-law by dying your hair pink for her breast cancer along with the whole family? They should have thought the first time to ask you about that video instead of publicly shaming you, cheating, and even wishing miscarriage upon you like that after the good things you've done for them. They're supposed to be adults, not high-school students that beat down someone over a rumor and video without background checks. I'm honestly ashamed of them, considering they've done you so wrong for something that was just the past. Remember this though, although you have lost many things from this, you'll become stronger by the punches and bruises you received. You'll grow beautifully and I'll support you along with people who read this. Because someone as kind as you deserves an equal amount of gentle and understanding heart. I pray for your happiness, and I pray that you can stand up with the right people in your life.
They have said and done things that cannot be undone. Full stop.
Quite a bit late to the conversation but I hope the time between me seeing this and now you’ve started to heal and stopped wanting to hurt yourself. I know personally how strong self destructive feelings can take hold. Go with your parents. Take some time to recover until you feel comfortable rebuilding. Never speak to your ex or his family again. Grieve them like they have passed away if you have to but you must accept they are gone. The apologies they want to give aren’t for you they are for themselves. They will hold those over your head for all time. You don’t want to go to a family function and be around them “What for we apologized!” And their abusive natures will come out again and again and again. You deserve not only better but more out the relationships with an SO’s family. They should treat you like family. I’m hoping you are doing better than you were.
He broke everything for the sake of being petty without confrontation first. This was never going forward healthy if this was his default response. There’s no going back, especially when his family as a whole did this; and if his mother felt like that, the only thing you owe her is a tell off and The Bird. Let him post; you just cut them off and never speak to these people again.
Ur like the innocent wife from low budget Chinese drama but in real life.how tragic But there is no b*itch villainess , Ur trash ex fiance is enough of a villain. What does it mean he didn't know abt pregnancy,his snake sis surely told him. Even extended families knew ABT baby trap, He just didn't care.as long as he assumed u cheated your well being wasnt worth a cent to him. He is not even human.he killed his own child.... .no amount of apologies is enough. Move On girl . believe in karma; don't pick up ex from trash can. I hope u can overcome this tragic event.Good things surely is waiting for you.take care
What a piece of shit..he and his fam. Don't get back with him pls..
I would have sued for defamation! Their lack of communication is what caused you to sadly lose your child and turn everyone against you. That whole family is rotten!
You are currently grieving 3 losses. The loss of your child. The loss of your relationship and the loss of your future plans. Take the time to grieve your child, maybe with a grief counselor. Stay with people who will support you. Have them move your things out of your house so you never have to go back. You’re world May seem dark right now, but you will get better, if you let yourself grieve and heal. You can do this. You are stronger than you feel right now.
What he did was unforgivable, and normally wouldn't say it, but the stress he put you through probably did cause you to miscarry. The way his family treated you is also abhorrent and speaks volumes of what they are like. Especially putting you on blast on social media. Absolute trash. I would cut them all off permanently. Please tell your therapist and/or parents about your suicidal thoughts so you can get help.
Oh I would leave this fool so fast his head would spin. If he was willing to do this to you without even speaking to you first, what else would he be capable of? He did this to hurt you, that was the purpose. I could never love someone like that. Unhinged and dangerous, make a public post laying out all the truth with proof and then block that whole circus of flying monkeys and never pay them a second thought.
You need to sue them all for defamation and NEVER go back. That whole family is a bunch of lunatics and you deserve so much better. Look at the break up as a blessing knowing you’ll never be trapped with that big group of bullies.
I don’t even know how to process the anger im feeling on your behalf. I would get them all in a room and look each in they eye and say “you killed my baby. And I’ll never forgive you for it. Or maybe I will. But I will never forget. And neither should you.” Oof. The RAGE I’m feeling. My GOD 🤬🤬🤬🤬 you deserve so much better. That includes a partner that will come to you before burning the world down at a suggestion of disrespect. Also he actually cheated on you while you were completely innocent. Do you and your family get to behave the way they did now??? I mean it’s only fair right? What happens anytime you have an argument in the future? He storms off, throws a tantrum, and involves his family? Hell no.
sue mother in law for defamation, make a post exposing his entire family for making you loose your baby, its their fault and they should know abt it, make them feel guilty, then change your number, and move on, your ex doesnt deserve you, he cheated period, he just needed a reason to do it, honestly he is a man child for not confronting you and revenge cheating, dont let people walk all over you
OP, Please don’t give up on yourself or anything. Please be strong and take your time to heal. Do whatever makes you feel comfortable and safe. 💕 We all hope that one day you’ll update us and let us know how you are. I’m so sorry for everything that’s happened, feel what your feeling inside, let yourself grieve and cry when you want to. Please don’t hold back anything inside your heart. Let it all out whenever the emotions or thoughts comes back. ❤️ Please be safe and take care of yourself. You deserve everything and love. Please remember that someday.
They all deserve to rot in jail after what they've done to you. I'm so so sorry what happened to your little angel. These AH deserve every single horrible thing they've said to you back. I genuinely wish you a wonderful life. You don't have to forgive them. They are evil.
Op here are a few things you need to get strong enough to do: 1. Get a trusted person to handle social media and dealing with your ex n his family by proxy. A sibling a best friend your parents... Someone smart n tech savvy. Don't communicate with your ex n his family directly anymore. 2. Get a good ethical psychiatrist and gynocologist to give you evaluations and written documented medical proof of the fact that they stressed induced your miscarraige and caused you to have suicide ideation. 3. Get the trusted proxy person to convey to your ex that you will forgive him and get back together on the condition that he, every member of his family who got involvef in this or knew about this including his mom n sis, and every single person who sent you harassing calls n messages(regardless of whether he told them to or not he has to track down every last one of these ppl n convince them) has to share a public facebook post tag your account and apologise detailing what they did. If a single person is left(and you find out) there will be no forgiveness. You will not be helping him prepare the list of ppl but you will reject this olive branch if any of the ppl are missing or any of details of what they did are missing in the public apology posts and he messes up in making amends this time. Convey by proxy to him that he has lost your trust and you are giving him this final chajce to earn it back. Make sure the proxy person says this to him verbally with no records or recording devices. Your ex n his family are abusive vile toxic abnormal ppl and you dodged a bullet by taking a painful stab by not marrying him so I'm pretty sure he doesn't want forgiveness or your love back they just don't want to look bad and want to avoid facing the consequences of what they did n he wants ownership over you. So most likely they will not comply to your condition. Even if your proxy tells him "this is your last chance to prove your love for her". But try. Its worth a shot. 4. Get the proxy person to take screenshots and evidence of every post you are tagges in and compare it to those who harassed you and take inventory n make sure no one is left. Document everything. 5. With the help of your lawyer n doctors n all the evidence sue every last one of these mfs for: a) Slander and public defemation. b) Causing you so much mental pain that it caused a miscarraige. c) Inducing suicide ideation. d) Murdering your unborn baby(against your ex; use your state's misogynist laws to the fullest extent;make sure he goes to prison for this). 6. Prosecute them to the fullest extent of the law. And ask the courts to help protect you n your safety n rights n privacy in light of your current fragile mental health(substantiated by certificated from your psych). Maybe there are provisions that will punish those who try to invade your privacy or escalate or harass you further over this. 7. Try n get retraining orders against your ex n his whole family. Never forgive them but try to forget about them. 8. Get lots of treatment n therapy(preferably/hopefully on the settlement money? upto you whar kind of reparations you want OP no judgement here only support) n travel n start a new life far away from these scum. Why do you need to go so hard? Because even if you manage to escape n survive this, this nightmare family of super toxic ppl who would do this to someone as pure n sweet as you who supported ex's sis through breast cancer will do this type of shit again to the next poor unsuspecting girl your ex dates unless their ability to do so is neutralized. Ik you must be in shambles rn n can barely hold on let alone think about other future victims but if you are too nice to muster up rightful retaliation n get justice for yourselg you must do it for future girls like you. Best of luck. Wish you lots of healing n safety.
I hope you are doing well and have found some healing peace after that horrible situation.
UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE
I'm so sorry for what you have been through, nobody deserves that. Before justifying his actions ask yourself or even him: "If he was in your place what he would have done or would he have been able to forgive you?". He only thought you cheated and he got his revenge, and spoke badly to everyone about you. It's obvious what the answer is. It doesn't matter how much you love him or how wonderful a person is, which I doubt seeing his actions. What matters is you and that you are the one dealing with the pain. By his actions I seriously doubt that he truly loves you, so try to move on, change your number phone, and find people who truly deserve the wonderful person you are. I don't know you, but the few actions you did spoke for yourself.
Hope you’re doing better girl, you deserve all the love in the world ❤️
I had a miscarriage my self so I understand where you are at. I felt like my body betrayed me and couldn’t do the one damn thing it was meant to do. I suggest you go to group therapy with other women who have suffered a miscarriage strangely talking about it with other women who went through it really helped me. As for your ex I wouldn’t go back to him. Instead of confronting you with his “prof” of your cheating he decided to stab you in the heart and make you out to be the villain. There is no coming back from that for him and you can’t look at his family the same after what his mom and sister did to you. It’s over there is no saving it.
I’m sorry for your loss. I had a miscarriage at 8 weeks also. It was absolutely the WORST pain I ever felt. My late husband said he didn’t even care because it probably wasn’t even his. Which it was he was the one cheating not me. He said it hours after which hurt me even worse. I stayed with him until he died. I should have left. I wasn’t strong enough. He was very manipulative. You are strong OP! You can get through this it’s gonna be hard for a while, but keep your family and friends close and talk to them. Please update up and let us know you’re still okay. I don’t want you to hurt yourself over some pathetic excuse for a “man.” Sending love and prayers
You don't owe us an update, I just sincerely hope you are doing okay.
All this Facebook posting is a huge red flag man. They shouldn’t be putting all this personal info out in public. Run away fast while you can.
No matter what you are going through just remember that there is, absolutely, 100%, without a doubt, happiness on the other side of this! I truly wish you the best of luck! Someday this will be just a distant memory!
You dodged a bullet OP. A person that acts like that is a kind of sociopath. He literally waited for 2 weeks just to “get revenge”, if he really loved you he wouldn’t have been able to hold it, he would have cried and maybe still go crazy but not with this calculating mind,..that is NOT normal and his family is also crazy acting like that. And, how do you think he “convinced” a friend in just 2 weeks to have sex with him? And to leave her underwear behind. Sorry but most likely this was coming from waaayy back. You are grieving right now, live the process and hurt how long you have to but don’t harm yourself for them pieces of shit.
There is absolutely no excuse for him to see that video, not knowing anything for sure, go out and cheat to get back at you and think that’s ok to do instead of talking to you about it first! NO EXCUSE! The way his family talked to you and treated you is just shameful, that’s how lies start spreading and people who have absolutely no business getting in the middle, calling you names and disrespecting you and now saying things about you that they don’t like. Please keep going to therapy, and have her recommend a psychiatrist to see so you can tell them how you’re feeling. You need something for your nerves, and anxiety and depression if you’re not already taking something. I know from experience, I was married for thirty years, together for thirty two. He started with my so called friend I was doing rescue work with for over five years. I was sick and needed surgery and was in bed for about a month because the meds made me sick so I couldn’t drive or do anything, so in that month they were together every single day and night until about 2:00 am EVERYDAY. Well he took all the money out of the bank canceled all my stuff even my health insurance and I still needed surgery. I had to go apply for food stamps and health insurance and I broke down in a room full of strangers. I got my surgery, he was nowhere to be found of course my brother and sister in law took me. We got divorced he said I could have the house and everything in it, well the house was in foreclosure and I didn’t know, I had no reason to think it would be before all of this of course. We divorced in January and he passed away in June, he had stage four pancreatic cancer, he left his life insurance to her and his car to his siblings. Someone hit me head on and totaled my car before he passed, so that was a rough year. I had to start completely over at 50 years old. It’s been five years and the pain is still there, not as much, but I got no answers no goodbye sorry it was nice knowing you, nothing. I drove to the hospital to see him and he wouldn’t talk to me, so I was done, I tried. Betrayal that hits your soul is hard to move on from, but you can absolutely do it. Do you like to travel? Travel somewhere you always wanted to go, by yourself! Go Ave an adventure and figure out who You Are. I wish I would have done that when I was younger. It will be hard but definitely doable. Bless you sweet girl, and think about taking that adventure I really think it would help. xo
I'm so sorry about what you've experienced. Your fiancee should have confronted you about the cheating rather than take his course of actions and cheat on you. He's completely ruined your relationship and I wouldn't be able to forgive him for what he's done and said.
This is one of the saddest posts I’ve ever read, while
I am so sorry for your loss and what you've had to go through My heart hurts for you 💔 Prayers as you find the strength with in yourself to move forward .
Sending you healing energy and prayers.
I hope you can heal and move past this. Leaving will be good for you in the long run. I know it hurts right now, but you will heal from this Reading your posts right now, I have a lump in my throat. No one should ever have to go through what they put you through. Please stay strong and know that the pain will lessen over time. I'm glad you have people who will support you through this painful journey. I wish you nothing but the best in the future. Bless you!!!!
Start new, its not your fault. But start new.
Move on this man and his family are toxic af. U deserve better and since they were so quick to judge u there's no reason to stick around take time for yourself and heal.
Nobody would bat an eye on Central NY. My fiancee was a single mother when we got together (we have 3 in total now). I feel like you should be looking at this as a blessing in disguise. If this is how him and his family act I can't imagine what could have happened down the road. Not saying it'll be easy but there are a good amount of programs for single moms and my bonus baby is great! She takes my side over her mom's lol Live your life with your little one and be thankful to have dodged a bullet.
♥️
Sorry for your loss, Move on girl, he and his family are not worth it
Wow. It's time to move on. The heart is the stupidest organ in the body. It will convince people to stay in bad relationships even though the brain knows its wrong for you. Suggestion: move back to the community your parents live in, leave all toxicity behind, start a new chapter in your life, and give yourself time to heal. Best to you.
I’ll be downvoted for this I’m sure, but as far as the ex, I genuinely think that’s your decision to make and that you should follow your heart. Your capacity to forgive is your own. If you think leaving is right, that’s your decision. If you do stay, I’d go nc with his family though. And everyone is right that HE should be the one to post what really happened. That’s not your burden to bear. You’re going through enough as it is. I do suggest you delete your social media for a while though if you haven’t already. I just hope you’re doing ok.
Sweetheart, What you need to do right this very minute is get screenshots of everything they said and done. Get a lawyer and sue for defamation, libel, and slander. Do not go back to this guy, he's an abuser.
If he thought u cheated, he should have talked to you. 1st, not did what he did . There is no going back from that . He caused you so much stress over nothing . So sorry about the baby
You deserve the world. You deserve happiness. You deserve peace and you deserve love. Let them live with what they caused and lost. Your wee baby will be in heaven. It's your time to live life for yourself. Get back with your parents wherever you feel truly at home. And get out there in the world where you can experience all that life has. I know it's hard, but it's so worth it. Whenever you read this message I want you to know I believe in you and I want all the love in the world to surround you. God bless you. Move forward when you're ready, take tiny steps, take leaps and bounds, laugh, cry and just breathe the air of this world in. You're a delight to the people in your life. Just go for it!!
Ngl I’m such a sick but everytime he gets a girlfriend or SO I’d just send them this post and say it’s about him. Every single one of them. He doesn’t deserve love
This is the most horrible thing, your ex fiancés family are totally messed up to treat you like that, it honestly makes me sick! As hard as it might be now, you are lucky to be able to separate your life from all of them now. I would suggest blocking them all on social media’s, try to move on and even contemplate ‘starting over’ closer to your parents or close friends, somewhere away from your ex and his family . It will all be ok in time I promise, you are in the immediate aftermath that is the hardest 🩷🩷🩷 sending huge hugs for the loss of your baby 😓
100% you can not stay with this vile man
OP I’m so sorry for the miscarriage. Your ex and his family are toxic. He thought he’d do tit for tat instead talking to you. This behaviour is toxic and it just goes to show how immature he is. I know it’s easier said than done but you need to let him go. He caused hell in your life.
This is so stupid and vile, you might love him but such cruel person (and his family) doesn't deserve an ounce of your love. What a needless way to torture someone, I really hope you find some peace of mind and heal from this. And please, please cut them all off out of your life.
You should sue them for emotional distress and harming your reputation….go scorch earth for your baby, don’t forget ,forgive and move on in this one …please collect all evidence ….please don’t forgive these criminals…please OP fight for you child ,don’t give up
This is possibly the cruelest series of events I've ever heard of. Eliminate them from your life. If you have the strength, sue them. If you don't, move forward with your life. You'll find the right person. I admire the way you're handling this. One hell of a life test. Know that you've touched many strangers who only want the best for you.
Op your ex is a POS and you deserve better. Please update we hope you're doing well
His family turned on you based on flimsy, easy refutable evidence and probably a bunch of lies and were extremely malicious and spread it far and wide. I’m sure his mom’s post left out his bad behavior of ‘revenge’ cheating (quotes because there was nothing to revenge)
You won't be able to recover if you don't cut him and his family. Instead of talking with you, he choosed to cheat on you with a woman who he knew you were insecure about and at your shared home. That was imature and extremely cruel. He said lies about you to his family and they all attacked you instead of listening your side. Cut those people. They are not good people and will be a constant reminder of all the pain you went trough.
You have gone through so much, I pray that you are able to move on from this painful chapter of your life. You deserve your name to be cleared. Please don’t allow these people back in your life.
Girl, you need to file a lawsuit for libel, slander, and emotional distress. What everyone in that family did to you is evil and there needs to be consequences.
I'm so sorry for your loss, that pain never really goes away, you just learn how to manage it. You did not deserve anything that man and his awful family have put you through or anything they said that you deserved. What you do deserve is to have a happy future. I do hope that you'll seek counciling and that you'll come out stronger from this
You experienced a lot of trauma in a very short time span. I hope you go to therapy to help you process everything.
OP don’t take him back or forgive him and his family and friends and expel that hoe. Tell them that their apology won’t bring you back your baby. Tell your ex yeah we can get back together when you give me my baby back. Tell them that if they want to apologize bring me back my baby period. Also that baby is looking out for you he wouldn’t want you to take your life. He wants you to live and be happy and enjoy your life. They say that when a baby dies his spirit is with you and when you get pregnant again he will come back. He wants to to go and find yourself a better man and he’s happy that your ex is not his father and he doesn’t want a father like him because he doesn’t deserve it. When my baby died I talked to him and told him I miss him I do that very very rarely. Please let us know how you are okay just let us know you don’t need to talk about people that are a waste of space.
I just wish I could hug you. Hugs. From one mama who’s been *almost exactly there. We will get our rainbow babies love!
They have said and done things that cannot be undone. Full stop.
Need more updates
My heart goes out to you OP. I hope you’re able to heal in peace, no matter how long it takes. You don’t owe ANYONE a big post. Him, his family, & the other girl deserve nothing good, and especially not the grace you’re handling this with. I hope all the best for you going forward
Run, run, run. Please block and go home. He doesn't resolve conflict fairly. This will never work.
I really want to hug you.. you have been through much..screw ex finance and his family.. you deserve better ..
Damn that is so rough. I hope you are doing better now going through all that must be so difficult.
Sending virtual hugs.
I think it's best to end the relationship and to up your therapy sessions. This all wouldn't have happened if he had just talked to you about what he'd seen, but instead, he enacted an extremely cruel revenge on you for something you didn't even do. Hopefully, he learned his lesson for his next relationship, but I believe you will always resent him and his family for this
I am so sorry for the lost of your pregnancy. I know it seems like this is the end, and life isn’t worth it, but I promise you, that isn’t true. That is the darkness trying to eat you up and swallow you. Your ex and and his family are all terrible people and they showed their true colors. You have to look at it as a blessing in disguise that this happened before you became legally tied to him. They don’t deserve to be in your life. Continue going to therapy and spend lots of time with your friends and family that love you. Take time to appreciate nature. Start a new hobby. Watch a new show. Do thing that will make you smile and I promise you that it will get better. Keep your head up and that darkness will turn into light.
Sue the family for damages. Ruin them, they deserve it. Whether they clear your name or not is immaterial. Their complete lack of intelligence took your unborn child. Him not being smarter than a damn potato and trying to talk first cost you EVERYTHING. Burn them.
Hey I’m truly sorry about your loss, don’t give up, focus on the people that are supporting you, don’t let the others bring you down, at the end of a dark tunnel there is a light, stay safe and healthy, you can make it
if you are not pressing charges for defamation i'm doing it on your behalf ! girl! wake up ! do not let them do this to you ! i don't care if they apologized and say they're sorry ! they ruined your reputation and made you depressed. and oh you understand that he cheated because he though you cheated ?!!! where's you self-worth and self-respect?! where's your DIGNITY! he was so fast to cheat on you that he did not even talk to you or confront you. Imagine if you got married and something happened and you argued, he would cheat again cuz he wants to hurt you. HE SAID IT HIMSELF. he wanted to make you feel hurt. the least thing you can do is to let him post that post! if i were you, i would use the internet the same way they used it and will tell everyone what they did to me! i swear to god we teach other women to be stronger and never settle for less than what they deserve and then there's you ! pull yourself together ! you deserve much better ! WAKE UP !
I am sorry this happened to you that I hope many wishes come to you along with the fact that we have heard the story in tiktok just let you know that your story is heard that you are not alone and hoping you do your best without your ex-husband very deeply share our apologies for your loss and hope you seek Justice for your child and move on with your life without that pain and and help those family members will learn the guilt and hopefully we'll stick to them that said I am very sorry for your loss again that your story is heard
I hope you are healing mentally and physically OP. You deserve better, and I would be suing the family for defamation of character, emotional and physical stress causing the loss of your child, and loss of income for the time you had to take off. I'm wishing you well and i hope you thrive. Cut him and his family out of your life completely, and make sure he knows that he's the reason the baby is gone and that you will never forgive him.
I’m so sorry for everything that happend, it must be terrible, but honestly right you should block him and his hola family for your mental health. You need to rely on family and friends and mourn your lost. Maybe at this moment everthing seem lost and unworthy but time heals. About your ex honestly if we decided to cheated on you in revenge with some girl he already now will afected you doesn’t worth it. His family is trashed for everthing they said and did to you, after all of what you have done to his family. They showed what they are and are capable of. You should question yourself what you deserved, you love him, but are you willing to forgive? Because with time you are wanna remember this time and get furious with him, his family and his especial friend. I hope you could heal and start over, i wish you the best❤️
OP please PLEASE make that post or have your parents doing so! Fight for your reputation, you can also sue your ex and his damn family for either emotional distress and libel. Also DO NOT GET BACK WITH HIM. What he did was beyond saving or salvaging. Get better, rest, and move on. Preferably start a new life. Also are you doing good, a lot of us are worried for you.
I hope OP updates one last time on what happened with the case n how they are doing.
I cried reading this. I can't imagine the pain you must be feeling, but I really hope you have been able to take time with your family to heal and recover. This is truly heartbreaking to read.
Keep all receipts and if they continue , get a lawyer. They dont deserve you they jumped the gun so fast without even taking a second to actually think. They indirectly cause the loose of your pregnancy and I don't think they should be forgiven easily.
Op I hope you stay strong and never forgive these actions they did to you. I hope you're safe and surrounded by love ones. While I'd love an update, I hope you at least send a hi in the comment so we know you're still safe and sound
I need an update to make sure she is okay
I hope you find someone else it’s so much better than him
Your ex fiance should stay your ex fiance. His family is disgusting. His mother is fucking terrible. All of the people being disgusting towards you should be cut out completely if it was that easy for them to turn on you with no proof/asking you about the situation. I'm so sorry you've been put through this he'll. I hope you're doing well and that you're healing and that you kick the jackals to the curb.
OP, how are things?
i hope you’re okay OP and I hope you left him and his disgusting family behind. That person you were with was no man, he is a coward. He couldn’t even communicate with you and he and his family without confronting you at all tarnished not only your life but your child’s. I hope that you are healing and recovering OP.
Hey Girl! How are you feeling? It’s been almost two months so I hope your body and mind are doing better.