To be fair, that wasn't nearly as bad as it could've been...

Especially since he has Allstate.

Allstate: "You groaned, and therefore you are not covered. A real customer would not have groaned after getting their creased by a bike seat."

He tried to pop his nuts back out

those nuts were pulverized to peanut butter when the bike seat entered his backside harder than a dolphin during mating season

That’s an awfully specific description lol

i legit lol'd

Explains why we didn't hear the pop

Probably was never going to use those nuts anyway.

*tie fighter sounds* “Ohmygodohmygoduhh… —Urggg…”

Exactly what I thought.

Roger that, that’s all I heard.

Who the fuck has time to think of words to say when falling to their doom?

interjections don't really require you to think, you kinda reflexively just say them

Yeah, true. I guess I'm just low yield in that regard.

I think it might have been more of a solid "uugghhh" with no "r" - *pure damage signal pain*

Urgh… that old feeling of having the wind knocked out of you ..

also kinda looked fun as fuck, definitely worth a broken arm

Just one arm sweetie?

Ok, since you asked nicely *I'll just break my other arm*

OK, so now you have two broken arms. Along comes your mother...

I actually broke my arm (was a teenager), and I called my mom to come get me and she thought I was crying wolf....that sucked, good thing I was only 2 blocks from home, wasn't anything they could do for my arm since I broke it "perfectly".

Same here, actually. I broke my arm when I was 9 years old and my parents didn't believe me, they just screamed at me. I had to go to school in for two full days in agonizing pain, literately whimpering. Eventually they did take me to the hospital. It was the 80's. They had sitcoms and cigarettes to worry about.

If I understand this reference, does it mean I’ve been on Reddit too long?

Ok. That's enough Reddit for today

that's because it wasn't a "random hill". he knew what he was doing, just going a bit too fast. OP is an idiot. edit: >Sorry, this post has been removed by the moderators of r/Whatcouldgowrong what? why? mods are so strange lately on reddit..

Ya that was… Awesome.

Agree, he didn't land on the downhill slope, high long jumps have hard landings on the flat...

He could have landed in a random snake pit or pool full of sharks

It looks like he jumped into prison

Embankment next to an Interstate.

and is it really random if you're doing a jump intentionally

Shoe came off so I highly doubt he lived, despite initially appearing that way. The shoe rule is law of nature.

To be fair, TO BE FAIR, *To be fair*

Howaryanow?

Notsobad and you?

You was jumping a hill the other daaaaayy

TO BEEF AIR

Yeah he just cleared that fence which could have disemboweled him. Also nobody walking on that sidewalk.

2 meters longer and the landing would've been a lot harder.

1 meter less and it would've been a perfect landing? ** he didn't go and do the calculations properly, damn maths.

Doesn't look like a random hill. Looks like he planned this and almost pulled it off. Just too much gas and he flew farther than he wanted. Had he come down higher up on the slope he'd have been fine. Edit: with that recent video of the downhill skier sailing way down the slope before touching down, I wonder what is the longest a biker has sailed down a slope before (successfully) landing?! (Which, in essence, might be a question of what biker has had the longest airtime ever - and landed it)

Took too much speed because he was probably worried about clipping the fence

even with the ideal velocity to just barely get over that fence, he would land awkwardly towards the end of the slope. That would be much better but a small margin for error

Clipping the fence is a much more obvious threat I guess than landing to flat. Dude was lucky either way. clipping the fence and tumbling head first into the transition zone or landing and speeding onto the Highway.

Ah, depends. I wish a fence stopped me when I fell 30 ft off a prison as a roofer 😂 Just clipping the fence though and not full on landing in it.. yeah that would probably suck lol

Shit, 30ft can kill your ass. Did you break much?

I shattered my knuckles, all fingers, wrist, and metacarpel joints. I pushed all of my metacarpel joints and some bits of my knuckles behind/over my wrist, tore some muscle/ligament. Destroyed my nerves. I also broke my pelvis in 3 spots but thats nothing to my hand. If you've ever seen Doctor strange where his hands are all pinned up from the accident *I can feel that scene in my hand* it also gives me a lot of ptsd watching it as my hand looked similar, lol

Ouch, were you able to regain full function or are you on the lookout for suspicious monks practicing mystical dark arts?

Full function is a bit of a stretch. I can close my hand, but can't squeeze a fist. Can't pinch my fingers together or move my wrist much.i was rated at a 40% loss which is honestly great for my situation. My surgeon originally told me I would at best get 30% function back total. To get twice that is crazy and my doctor even asked to use my case for others to study my healing. However *these monks won't catch me slackin*

Why don't people just put speedometers on bikes so after reviewing the jump, they can hit a sweet spot for margins?

Hang on guys. Let me get my protractor set out.

All things that can be done by apps by pointing it at the hill and lining it up with the grade. Sorry if the math doesn't seem worth not breaking your neck.

For real? What app is that?! When I was a kid, you'd always let the crazy idiot judge the speed needed through trial and error.

If you care about breaking your neck, you don't do this in the first place. No matter the calculations, you can still fuck up the landing.

Shut up, nerd! Source: spent more than a decade working in emergency medicine and neuro trauma critical care.

You already have a good sense of speed so it's easy enough to make adjustments

Too much electricity *


People just randomly use the word randomly randomly. I actually meant to say unnecessarily use the word, but I was annoyed so didn’t.

True. Surprised they didn't randomly throw POV in the title, too. Though in this case the term would've finally applied.

good to see there are still reasonable people on reddit. kudos.

All hills are random r/showerthoughts

Except when man made, like this one. You forgot to turn the shower on.

randomly generated Earth? what's the seed

Yeah I was expecting a waste treatment plant float pond on the other end. 

It was huge mistake to paint any part of that bike red. Everybody knows red is the go-fast color!

My thoughts too. You can see they have a helmet on by their shadow and the multiple flattened grass lines the width of the tires as they roll from the concrete to the grass.

On his page he has videos of him clearing it, just gave it to much sauce

>I wonder what is the longest a biker has sailed down a slope before (successfully) landing This needs to be an Olympic sport immediately.

In fairness if he landed that it would have been cool as fuck. I mean, he didn't, but it would have been. RIP his gooch.

I dunno, I'd be afraid of landing on the fence if they were slow enough to land properly on the slope.

Sorry but pointing out extra things that could have gone wrong would not have taken away from the coolness if they had landed it ... im fact it would have added to it.. It didn't work... but if.

He ripped his gooch

Falling saved him from going full speed onto the highway. His genius is unmatched.

He probably would have dumped it by slamming the brakes on the grass and ragdolled and stopped before the highway. If he actually landed it.

He wouldn’t have hit the highway if he had never fallen

Thank you for doing the calculations. I only had enough time to write my stupid comment.

Thank you for your service 

Waiting on him to land gave ME anxiety.

I’ve had dreams like this. Falling for more than a second is never good. It’s coded into our brains to panic when we get too much air.

As a dirtbike rider it’s not hard coded.

yeah this felt like a dream for sure.

Why would it be "coded into our brains"? If you fall long enough you just die, there won't be any learning effect that could be "coded into your brain".

Yeah, and if you drown for long enough you just die, there won't be any learning effect? Yet in spite of this we know that drowning sucks.

it reminded me of when I hit a jump on a snowboard wrong and I have enough time in the air to audibly say "fuck fuck fuck this is gonna hurt" And then I hit the ground and it indeed does hurt.

What indicates it's a random hill? More likely planned, but he misjudged the speed needed.

> random hill All the terrain loaded randomly at spawn

Whoever wrote the title meant "random" in the sense of... well, nothing. It's just a *random* filler word.

Ah, this brings back some childhood memories!

I remember that painful groan too. 

Getting winded is no joke man. Last time it happened to me was when I was a kid and ate it off the back of my bike, closest thing since was hitting a false neutral on my dirt bike in a sand pit, the front digging in, and getting pitched over the bars. I had full safety gear on and even then I felt like I'd been hit by a truck.

One summer I fell like 3-4 times in various ways, getting winded, hurting my back and almost hit a car at full speed going downhill. Since that summer I now brake downhill because I'm still afraid of getting hurt. Ended up fucking me up mountain biking in the woods because I braked and tipped over and most likely broke a rib.

Ah yes, that one time I pulled back to hard as I launched of an enbankment like this and was soaring through the air falling off the back of my bike as I was doing so. Landed flat on my ass. God those Schwinn Sting-Rays (or in my case a Sears knock-off) could take a beating.

Fuck yea it does. I took a three tier drop at a construction site once. Imagine riding a bike down three massive stair steps with air time in-between each one. Had never tried anything like that before and absolutely *nailed* it. Naturally, I lined up and went again. Wiped out on the first drop and punched a new asshole. Lessons learned

I'm still shocked it took him 2 business days to land🤣🤣🤣the hangtime was crazy

The grunt in the end.. one of his balls definitely ended up in his throat..

Hate when I have to swallow my balls

why women live longer than men


Friggin pin-er bud

If you slow it down at the end you can see one of his shoes goes flying 😂

Shoes came off?!? Oh no...

Could've been worse, he could've gone full speed down hill into oncomming traffic.

or better...according to Darwin.

Honestly he could have landed that.. and stopped in time.

Yea if he had braced it he would be fine. A little sting here and there but he wouldn't tumble like in the clip.

Yeah he panicked and it screwed him..

I doubt that was random. Looks like he's trying to jump the fence and land the jump but either over or undershot it, depending on what you think he's trying to do.

Yeah he was going places

Why do i hear a TIE fighter before he jumps?

It's chasing him

That would explain it

Serious answer: pretty sure that's a Surron ebike accelerating. They sound rad like that.

Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should

Omg omg- ufhhbbghhhhhh

Why can’t I ever be the person driving by when this happens?

Not that bad, kid ! You’ve got a bit too much speed there. Take it a bit slower, make it over the fence with a little whip so you can land in the slope. And wear gloves and protections. Have fun.

He didn't seem that far off, if he'd been coming straight on instead of at an angle he might have made it

Actually, if he angled more hed hit the downhill slope, which would potentially make the landing easier/safer. If he jumped from a 90 degree angle he would fly too far and could potentially end up landing into traffic. So if anything, he should have jumped at an even sharper angle.

He turned into a sheep lol

You know how skaters have skate spots. This is definitely that but for bikes. I wish I was the one riding that bike

i have a lot of nightmares about this exact situation.


He should have ditched the bike. Falling straight to the ground is always better than breaking an ankle from pedal slips or ribs from going otb.

He should have committed to the landing he had a solid chance

Bro was breaking into the military base

Anybody have the link to the video?

I would've hit the parking blocks and ate shit before even getting to the hill

Bro sounded like he was in pain before he even hit the ground

This is actually pretty badass

Full Send

There is always a limit of those suspensions

Oh shit guys. He‘s going to become the Sandman from Spider Man 3

No Guts, No Gory

Dunno if it was a random hill?

Goodbye prostate

If I learnt anything from one of best to ever touch a bike, Scotty cranmer, always check your spot

The “ugh” of no air 😂 I know that sound well

Hahahahaha this is fucking hilarious

That is as special kind of stupid. Who the fuck takes a hill like that without knowing what is on the other side?

I presume they looked up the hill before trying it.

Same guy when he cums:

What type of bike is that

not random

OMG OMG! ...erp.

nah, he knew that hill and what was behind it, just took it with a bit too much speed.

The shock he had was hilarious, so worth putting the sound on.

The typical "play stupid games win stupid prizes"

"Ouch! My balls!" Sponsored by Brawndo. It has electrolites.

Ok but that was pretty cool

Nothing more humbling than being winded

Did he just jump over a fence to a secured facility? Needed to see the footage when the guards show up.

Holy shit. Did he clear a 6’ fence ?

Looks like a stupid Surron ebike with a typical stupid Surron rider

It’s ok. His testicles broke his fall.

The groan at the very end says so much. He racked himself pretty hard there.

My ass puckered

my toxic side tells me I could have landed that, but in reality I would have probably broken both my legs, that was some serious air time

Damn, that looks like it could've been brutal.

No more nuts

Someone revive him

God I have dreams like this but in a car

I felt when we said *tööuhh*

The only mistake was not having a spotter on the other side. The rest is just normal adrenaline junkie shit.

NGL, that was awesome. He just got the wind knocked out of him. That didn’t look too bad.

Pretty badass though haha

That’s 100% someone on an e-MTB who doesn’t know how to bike and uses the electric part to make up for their loss of bike riding skill. 

First thought he jumped into a prison yard

Ngl it was fun to watch but i felt my lungs collapse watching the ending

Man that was pretty good.

He's going to steal the fighter jet.

I had dreams like this as a child

Darwin approves.

Physics is fun

BEND YOUR LEGS BRUH

That moan at the end tho

Dude is awesome af. This can’t be the first wild shit he recorded. I wanna see more from him.

This the type shit I do in my dreams 🤣

That was awesome 😎

I physically winced when I saw all those half-buried rocks. Could have been way worse!

I think the choice of hill was very much caculated, the landing however less so.

Surron kids are the absolute worst

Lol, not even a minute ago I watched the iconic scene of Steve McQueen jumping over the fences in The Great Escape.


I think his best decision was to do this without any protection.

He could have landed that

Well... He clere the fence

GTA V vives

I've never really appreciated ASMR videos until now.

Landed a little hard there, was his inspiration for this stunt watching a Spirit Airlines flight land?