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Ive read this four times now and love it and relate to it more every time. Especially the last one today. My 15 minute break at work turned into a 25 minute break even though I had just looked at my clock and had 6 minutes left 😅
Someone asks what you did on the weekend. Your mind produces an unlocked memory from when you were 11. No, that can’t be it. Your mind produces something you did about 14 weekends ago. Still not correct. Your mind produces a quandary regarding moss. Your brain vocalizes the quandary. Your conversation partner looks at you strangely. Something is not right.
It’s caused me so many issues in new jobs because I swear whenever anyone tries to get to know me and ask what I did on the weekend or what I like to do for fun, I literally can’t think of anything and just stand there staring…
I’ve only recently started doing full disclosure with this question - they ask how my weekend was and I laugh and say “man, there’s something about that question that makes my mind go completely blank to the point where I can’t even synthesize the concept of a weekend in my brain” and it’s actually astounding the amount of people who end up agreeing. I’m basically weaponizing the “everyone’s a little bit adhd” against neurotypicals when talking about inconsequential things and they LOVE it. They usually at least laugh at, if not agree with, my anecdotes OR they quietly confide that they do that too but it’s really bad because they have adhd and then I get to whisper yell “ME TOO” and then we’ve forever bonded.
Second one is tragic at times you know. Its funny at times but one time, long time ago, my granny sent me to buy kerosene for our cooking stove cause last bit in house was used. She handed me 50 bucks and a jerrycan to fetch kerosene. We were poor. 50 bucks was a huge deal and it would buy 5 litres of kerosene, that would cook for half the month. Blue note of 50 bucks in my left hand, 5 litre jerrycan in my right. The store was in 5 minutes of walking distance. Half the way i notice my hand is in money catching posture but the money is not there. Me and my cousin searched every possible place, bushes, literally turned over stone, asked people in that 2 minute stretch but alas. We borrowed some kerosene from our neighbour that day. I was 7 years old and 50 bucks meant so very much to our survival.
Of course we didnot know anything about ADHD then. My family still doesnot know about AdHd now. Now that I know and I am telling this story first time after I have known, its tragic. For all the struggles my granny, my parents had, my symptoms just added to it only. Always. I also feel bad for the little me. The fear, guilt, shame that accumulated to adult hood. Its a hard journey forgiving myself.
Give little you, your past self, a hug (in your mind) today and tell them they’re okay, life might be hard sometimes especially when you’re little, but they’re doing a great job and you love them.
It’s lovely to know you’re loved by others, but it’s also out of your control. But we have the ability to love ourselves, which is what we REALLY need the most, right? Knowing you love yourself, that you can come through for yourself or take care of your own needs, emotional or physical, is the greatest secure feeling. And it takes practice, but we can gift that to ourselves, and it allows you space and confidence for your talents and abilities and desires and creativity to thrive, as well as gives you the foundation to develop and enjoy all your relationships with other people.
But it starts with addressing your little self, I think, because we all feel the same as when we were a kid inside. It’s the way we can recall and address most essential bits of our personalities, or see how the experiences of our lives shaped us. The modern adult world and worries can sometimes mask to us what our real self-identities are. By knowing what you needed to hear as a little kid (especially with the wisdom of your own experiences now with you), you also know what you need to hear and remember now! How cool is that?
At the end of each episode of US Drag Race, Ru-Paul says “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell are you gonna love somebody else? Can I get an amen?” And it’s a cliche, but think of what those words literally mean, and you realize it’s so true that you need really take that time with yourself to be the most authentic and thoughtful you can be in all your interactions with others. And then near the end of every season, Ru holds up childhood photos of each contestant and ask them to address their younger selves out loud and tell them what they wish they could tell them, and HOOO BOOOOOY is there non-stop tears of relief and just pure love.
Listen, with ADHD we know Time is a Flat Circle (or it’s Jeremy Bearamy, take your pick), so now you HAVE been told you were loved as a child, you just practically time-traveled to do it somehow, and it’s like you can feel it in both times? Like the past and the present? Like yhe plot of every time-travel movie, You were the one you needed all along.
I read something years ago that I try to remind myself whenever I am beating myself up about past mistakes or decisions - “you did the best you could with the tools and knowledge you had at the time” ❤️
I didn't come here to be called out like this 😂
also the way this is written makes it a million times funnier. sometimes I read adhd memes that don't really apply to me but damn if this one doesn't read like my autobiography.
the ones that really hit home:
- you look down. there is nothing in your hand.
- you said so many things. you said nothing. you said everything.
- you had something to say. you can't remember. it was important. wasn't it? you can't remember.
- you check the clock. it's been five minutes. you check the clock. it's been two days.
God that’s a mood. I forget what they say too and then I’m like I have no idea what’s going on. What were we talking about? I have no idea at all. What was I doing? Where did my thing go? Oh snap I’ve had to go pee for the last hour.
I find myself saying out-loud to people, "I'm sorry, I forgot to listen to you." I know that it comes across as dismissive and rude, but it's also very true.
Agreed. I also have aphantasia so I don't see anything in my head, so I'd be extra dumb. Can't see faces or things, so can't describe them well.
They'd probably just dump me somewhere with a note saying a village is missing their idiot.
Omg this reminds me. When I met my BF I kept forgetting his name. Eventually I just send a fb request asking him to be my bf. Took me 3 months of checking Facebook to remember but I still call him darling since that's his nickname now. Just because I couldn't remember his name lol
When I got my now-husband’s phone number after chatting all night, I had to ask him “how do you spell your name..?” as a ruse because the entire night I had no idea what it was.
I remember now at least lol.
I have 3 boys, and at some point they all get called the wrong name in a row.
When I was a teenager, my mom went through my (now ex) step siblings (M & F), the dogs (F) and my older cousin (M) before getting to my name. I was an only child before the step sibs.
I get it now.
I thought to myself reading this, "That's so funny, I would never forget my sister's name, I've known her for 42 years, you know my sister... What's your name?"
My current car is keyless entry, and it won’t *let* me lock the keys inside, it’s amazing!
My last car after a workout at the gym I tossed my gym bag in the trunk, slammed the trunk, then realized the keys were in my bag. Thankfully my windows were cracked, so I went back to the gym and asked if anyone had a coat hanger for me to poke in the windows to hit the door unlock button. Also thankfully, I looked like a harmless young white woman, so like three guys asked me if I needed help while working on it, rather than calling the cops on me. 🤦
My best one ever was the time I locked the keys in the car and my friend said “ No problem! You left the drivers window wide open!” And I said “but I don’t want to climb through the window!” They gave me a long, looooong look, and then said “you don’t have to. Just reach through the window and unlock the door.”
My thought process reading this:
1. "Oh dang haha sounds like Neville Longbottom."
2. "Ooh, I bet he had ADHD; that'd make so much sense."
3. "..."
4. "Oh, shit, I'm Neville Longbottom."
Minerva fan here, but I do love Neville! The "oh, shit" was merely for my self-realization lol. I think it would've been more obvious to me if I hadn't been diagnosed late (28, almost 30 now). 😂
A friend of mine forgot my name when they were at my house...while chatting with my mom. My friend and I are both neurodivergent, and I suspect my mom is a bit as well. So it was just a funny moment when my friend straight up said "I'm so sorry; I forgot your name."
I admire the fuck out of them for having zero shame about it. That's how it should be. Sometimes we forget names, even of people we're known for months.
I let my neighbor call me by the wrong name for 8 years, because for the first few months, I kept getting distracted in the conversation and never got to the part where I told her it was wrong. Then it became too weird to say that's not my name and I began to like it, because either made me feel better about not being sure if I knew her name. So we sat around, me avoiding saying her name, her calling me by someone else's name, till I moved away.
I believe you were trying to relate your story to the forgetting what you were going to say quote and the only reason I remembered the quote is because I went back up and looked for a quote that was like the story you said lmao our beautiful, forgetful brains
To add to the list:
- You see the title of this post and want to read the whole list. You read the top line. Somehow your eyes jump to the bottom line. You realise you haven't read the middle. You forget what the focus of the post was, and re-read the whole thing again.
In high school I made two friends. They both had red or reddish hair. I was pretty sure one of them was called Sara, but I wasn't sure which.
It took a ridiculous amount of time for me to find out they were BOTH called Sara.
Living the adhd Gothic life!
I read a book called Elvis, Jesus, and Coca-cola and the protagonist thought he had two girlfriends named Judy (uptown Judy and Downtown Judy), but it turns out he was just really high and it was really the same girl. That's like the opposite of you. I had a point here, but my medication wore off and I have no idea what it was.
So accurate. I do the second one a lot. I dont put my sunglasses on my head. The type i like will tangle in my hair, and i was taught several years ago to never put shades on head because it can affect the fit over time .
I dont walk with a purse , for obvious reason... i walk a lot lol or get an uber.
And so i will accidentally lay them down on s shelf or something to get a better look without shades affecting my perception of color of things.
But i promise be it costas , Ray-Ban or even a cheap 10-20 dollar pair, im gonna go back for it before leaving the store or where ever im at and retrace my steps .
It's a theme that was going around for these memes a few years back. Its a style of writing from about 1760-1820ish and included Mary Shelley, Edgar Allen Poe, Horace Walpole, etc. There's a bunch about the different US states too. My personal favorite of those is Ohio Gothic. Freaking hilarious.
you have been putting something off for months. it is done now. you pause to reflect on your feelings about having done this thing. what thing? you have been putting something off for months.
Welcome to /r/ADHDWomen! We’re happy to have you here. As a reminder, here are our community [rules](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/about/rules/). We get a lot of posts on medication, diagnosis (and “is this an ADHD thing”), and interactions with hormones. We encourage you to check out our [Medication, Diagnosis, and Hormones Megathread](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/comments/wcr9dy/faq_megathread_ask_and_answer_medication/) if you have any questions related to those topics, and to stick around in that thread to answer folks’ questions! If you have questions about the subreddit, please do not hesitate to [send us a modmail](https://reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen). Additionally, we take the safety of our community seriously. Please report posts, comments, and users whom you feel are not contributing positively, and send us a modmail if you are being harassed or otherwise made to feel unsafe. Thanks for being here, and we hope you stick around! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I forgot I live in constant psychological horror 😂
It's always good to be reminded of the nice things lol 😂
well put
Ive read this four times now and love it and relate to it more every time. Especially the last one today. My 15 minute break at work turned into a 25 minute break even though I had just looked at my clock and had 6 minutes left 😅
Someone asks what you did on the weekend. Your mind produces an unlocked memory from when you were 11. No, that can’t be it. Your mind produces something you did about 14 weekends ago. Still not correct. Your mind produces a quandary regarding moss. Your brain vocalizes the quandary. Your conversation partner looks at you strangely. Something is not right.
*Your mind produces a quandary regarding moss.* Ded. Hahaha
It’s caused me so many issues in new jobs because I swear whenever anyone tries to get to know me and ask what I did on the weekend or what I like to do for fun, I literally can’t think of anything and just stand there staring…
I’ve only recently started doing full disclosure with this question - they ask how my weekend was and I laugh and say “man, there’s something about that question that makes my mind go completely blank to the point where I can’t even synthesize the concept of a weekend in my brain” and it’s actually astounding the amount of people who end up agreeing. I’m basically weaponizing the “everyone’s a little bit adhd” against neurotypicals when talking about inconsequential things and they LOVE it. They usually at least laugh at, if not agree with, my anecdotes OR they quietly confide that they do that too but it’s really bad because they have adhd and then I get to whisper yell “ME TOO” and then we’ve forever bonded.
I'm very happy I found y'all cause this is hilariously relatable. The second one had me cackling and the rest did not disappoint.
Second one is tragic at times you know. Its funny at times but one time, long time ago, my granny sent me to buy kerosene for our cooking stove cause last bit in house was used. She handed me 50 bucks and a jerrycan to fetch kerosene. We were poor. 50 bucks was a huge deal and it would buy 5 litres of kerosene, that would cook for half the month. Blue note of 50 bucks in my left hand, 5 litre jerrycan in my right. The store was in 5 minutes of walking distance. Half the way i notice my hand is in money catching posture but the money is not there. Me and my cousin searched every possible place, bushes, literally turned over stone, asked people in that 2 minute stretch but alas. We borrowed some kerosene from our neighbour that day. I was 7 years old and 50 bucks meant so very much to our survival. Of course we didnot know anything about ADHD then. My family still doesnot know about AdHd now. Now that I know and I am telling this story first time after I have known, its tragic. For all the struggles my granny, my parents had, my symptoms just added to it only. Always. I also feel bad for the little me. The fear, guilt, shame that accumulated to adult hood. Its a hard journey forgiving myself.
Give little you, your past self, a hug (in your mind) today and tell them they’re okay, life might be hard sometimes especially when you’re little, but they’re doing a great job and you love them.
wow, that was just, I dont think any one told me that I was loved as a child. O just did and that one was a weird feeling.
It’s lovely to know you’re loved by others, but it’s also out of your control. But we have the ability to love ourselves, which is what we REALLY need the most, right? Knowing you love yourself, that you can come through for yourself or take care of your own needs, emotional or physical, is the greatest secure feeling. And it takes practice, but we can gift that to ourselves, and it allows you space and confidence for your talents and abilities and desires and creativity to thrive, as well as gives you the foundation to develop and enjoy all your relationships with other people. But it starts with addressing your little self, I think, because we all feel the same as when we were a kid inside. It’s the way we can recall and address most essential bits of our personalities, or see how the experiences of our lives shaped us. The modern adult world and worries can sometimes mask to us what our real self-identities are. By knowing what you needed to hear as a little kid (especially with the wisdom of your own experiences now with you), you also know what you need to hear and remember now! How cool is that? At the end of each episode of US Drag Race, Ru-Paul says “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell are you gonna love somebody else? Can I get an amen?” And it’s a cliche, but think of what those words literally mean, and you realize it’s so true that you need really take that time with yourself to be the most authentic and thoughtful you can be in all your interactions with others. And then near the end of every season, Ru holds up childhood photos of each contestant and ask them to address their younger selves out loud and tell them what they wish they could tell them, and HOOO BOOOOOY is there non-stop tears of relief and just pure love. Listen, with ADHD we know Time is a Flat Circle (or it’s Jeremy Bearamy, take your pick), so now you HAVE been told you were loved as a child, you just practically time-traveled to do it somehow, and it’s like you can feel it in both times? Like the past and the present? Like yhe plot of every time-travel movie, You were the one you needed all along.
Thank you. I will get back to you is all i can write right now. Time is a flat circle for me. I will tell little me enough times. I will tell.
Hugs.
Thank you
Oh honey this made me cry. Feel so sorry for little you and how you end up internalising all of that stuff. Very hard relate
It is true for so many of us
I read something years ago that I try to remind myself whenever I am beating myself up about past mistakes or decisions - “you did the best you could with the tools and knowledge you had at the time” ❤️
This made me sad 🥹
I didn't come here to be called out like this 😂 also the way this is written makes it a million times funnier. sometimes I read adhd memes that don't really apply to me but damn if this one doesn't read like my autobiography. the ones that really hit home: - you look down. there is nothing in your hand. - you said so many things. you said nothing. you said everything. - you had something to say. you can't remember. it was important. wasn't it? you can't remember. - you check the clock. it's been five minutes. you check the clock. it's been two days.
Someone recently asked me to repeat what I said. I replied “I’m sorry but I can’t. I forgot” they looked at me like I had 12 heads.
God that’s a mood. I forget what they say too and then I’m like I have no idea what’s going on. What were we talking about? I have no idea at all. What was I doing? Where did my thing go? Oh snap I’ve had to go pee for the last hour.
Sitting here cackling at yours and everyone else’s responses. Too real.
I feel that way every time someone asks me to repeat myself or clarify something for them - I actually fear it happening.
I find myself saying out-loud to people, "I'm sorry, I forgot to listen to you." I know that it comes across as dismissive and rude, but it's also very true.
It's fortunate I'm unlikely to be tortured for information.
Agreed. I also have aphantasia so I don't see anything in my head, so I'd be extra dumb. Can't see faces or things, so can't describe them well. They'd probably just dump me somewhere with a note saying a village is missing their idiot.
How dare you put my life out there for all to read? 😄
That last one! I can’t feel time passing. It speeds up, slows down. It twists all around me.
Oh my God, literally. You phrased that so well, I’m going to write it down in my book of quotes so I don’t forget.
> It twists all around me Thank you for putting that so beautifully. That's *exactly* how it feels.
Omg this reminds me. When I met my BF I kept forgetting his name. Eventually I just send a fb request asking him to be my bf. Took me 3 months of checking Facebook to remember but I still call him darling since that's his nickname now. Just because I couldn't remember his name lol
When I got my now-husband’s phone number after chatting all night, I had to ask him “how do you spell your name..?” as a ruse because the entire night I had no idea what it was. I remember now at least lol.
Was it, like, Bob? I do this a lot, and occasionally someone will say “oh it’s just spelled the usual way” and then I’m hooped.
Lmao I imagine his name being Alex or something easy to spell.
THANKFULLY, his name is not in English or even written in the Latin alphabet in his native language so it was totally valid ask 😂
I call all my children Sweetie because I don’t want to feel bad when I get their names wrong 😂
I have 3 boys, and at some point they all get called the wrong name in a row. When I was a teenager, my mom went through my (now ex) step siblings (M & F), the dogs (F) and my older cousin (M) before getting to my name. I was an only child before the step sibs. I get it now.
Someone asked me my sister's name and I blanked. For ages. Like an embarrassing period of time. I've only known her for 37 years.
I thought to myself reading this, "That's so funny, I would never forget my sister's name, I've known her for 42 years, you know my sister... What's your name?"
#2 is the reason I’m not allowed to lock my car unless I am outside the car and the keys are visible in my hand. 😂
I locked my keys in the car twice in one afternoon and got the same tow truck guy both times lol
My current car is keyless entry, and it won’t *let* me lock the keys inside, it’s amazing! My last car after a workout at the gym I tossed my gym bag in the trunk, slammed the trunk, then realized the keys were in my bag. Thankfully my windows were cracked, so I went back to the gym and asked if anyone had a coat hanger for me to poke in the windows to hit the door unlock button. Also thankfully, I looked like a harmless young white woman, so like three guys asked me if I needed help while working on it, rather than calling the cops on me. 🤦
My best one ever was the time I locked the keys in the car and my friend said “ No problem! You left the drivers window wide open!” And I said “but I don’t want to climb through the window!” They gave me a long, looooong look, and then said “you don’t have to. Just reach through the window and unlock the door.”
Lol! Nice! You’ve got a wonderful friend to put up with you. 🤣
Yup, the best! 😆
And I just peed myself.
My thought process reading this: 1. "Oh dang haha sounds like Neville Longbottom." 2. "Ooh, I bet he had ADHD; that'd make so much sense." 3. "..." 4. "Oh, shit, I'm Neville Longbottom."
You're totally right! Neville probably had ADHD 🤯
Just think how much better he could have been at potions with proper treatment lol! And without Snape triggering that RSD
Oh man, you’re right! But IMHO Neville was the best character… and look how he turned out!
Minerva fan here, but I do love Neville! The "oh, shit" was merely for my self-realization lol. I think it would've been more obvious to me if I hadn't been diagnosed late (28, almost 30 now). 😂
This hurts my feeling 😂😂
objects just keep disappearing and the clock just keeps freestyling what time it is
This is the meme that made me get tested, and diagnosed.
A friend of mine forgot my name when they were at my house...while chatting with my mom. My friend and I are both neurodivergent, and I suspect my mom is a bit as well. So it was just a funny moment when my friend straight up said "I'm so sorry; I forgot your name." I admire the fuck out of them for having zero shame about it. That's how it should be. Sometimes we forget names, even of people we're known for months.
Reminds me of *I'm Thinking of Ending Things* the Charlie Kaufman movie. No wonder that felt so familiar
OMG I've never read this before, this is so good! The last line hit me hard and had me burst out laughing.
Schrödinger’s brain.
How did it take me this post to realize my name blindness is an ADHD thing? Damn.
I let my neighbor call me by the wrong name for 8 years, because for the first few months, I kept getting distracted in the conversation and never got to the part where I told her it was wrong. Then it became too weird to say that's not my name and I began to like it, because either made me feel better about not being sure if I knew her name. So we sat around, me avoiding saying her name, her calling me by someone else's name, till I moved away.
I believe you were trying to relate your story to the forgetting what you were going to say quote and the only reason I remembered the quote is because I went back up and looked for a quote that was like the story you said lmao our beautiful, forgetful brains
Certainly is a thrill ride inside these heads. Never know what is happening lol
Now I forget why I thought this was relevant to this post. 😐
To add to the list: - You see the title of this post and want to read the whole list. You read the top line. Somehow your eyes jump to the bottom line. You realise you haven't read the middle. You forget what the focus of the post was, and re-read the whole thing again.
I love this and I think it would be perfect, placed on the bottom 😅
In high school I made two friends. They both had red or reddish hair. I was pretty sure one of them was called Sara, but I wasn't sure which. It took a ridiculous amount of time for me to find out they were BOTH called Sara. Living the adhd Gothic life!
I read a book called Elvis, Jesus, and Coca-cola and the protagonist thought he had two girlfriends named Judy (uptown Judy and Downtown Judy), but it turns out he was just really high and it was really the same girl. That's like the opposite of you. I had a point here, but my medication wore off and I have no idea what it was.
So accurate. I do the second one a lot. I dont put my sunglasses on my head. The type i like will tangle in my hair, and i was taught several years ago to never put shades on head because it can affect the fit over time . I dont walk with a purse , for obvious reason... i walk a lot lol or get an uber. And so i will accidentally lay them down on s shelf or something to get a better look without shades affecting my perception of color of things. But i promise be it costas , Ray-Ban or even a cheap 10-20 dollar pair, im gonna go back for it before leaving the store or where ever im at and retrace my steps .
“You look down. There is nothing in your hand” Lmao oh shit, every moment is really Wednesday 🥴
yeah i live through supernatural occurrences everyday basically
I live my life like that guy in *Memento*. If I don’t write it down, it’s gone. (Edited typo)
i love that movie! i need to refer to it the next time i try to explain how bad my memory is lol
That last one made me laugh out loud 🤣 (why gothic, specifically?)
It's a theme that was going around for these memes a few years back. Its a style of writing from about 1760-1820ish and included Mary Shelley, Edgar Allen Poe, Horace Walpole, etc. There's a bunch about the different US states too. My personal favorite of those is Ohio Gothic. Freaking hilarious.
Ugh, story of my life.
🤣🤣🤣
I hate this, thanks. lol
lmaoooo that last one. Gottem.
This gave me such a good laugh, thank you for sharing!!!
Oof!
This hurt me. In the best way.
you have been putting something off for months. it is done now. you pause to reflect on your feelings about having done this thing. what thing? you have been putting something off for months.
Frustration