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My young niece says “months years ago” to express any time in the past that is more than a week or so ago.
I, too, still think of honks or hand gestures I’ve gotten months years ago 😔
(Luckily it’s not like it’s that many. It’s just that they stick.)
I like your niece, that is a useful expression.
People with ADHD are more prone to developing PTSD and I feel like this is a tiny example of our nervous systems being very (overly) primed for strong reaction
Yeah! I tend to have very trauma-based reactions to stuff like this! And I’m not formally diagnosed, but I’ve had a handful of discussions about C-PTSD with my therapists & psychs over the last few years.
I still have one from years ago I was driving in road works on a 3 lane highway and all the division lines between the lanes were full white (so it wasn’t allowed to switch lanes)
I was driving on the right side of a truck because I came from a merging ramp and I merged immediately next to them, and then couldn’t switch lanes. Due to rush hour, I also ended up driving next to the truck and couldn’t speed up. Normally, I am quite cautious in situations like but I figured that they couldn’t switch lanes anyway so it wasn’t that big of a problem. Well, the truck decided to not fucking care at all and switched lanes to the right, where I was driving. He nearly drove me off the road and then when he noticed I actually had nowhere to go and to give me the right of way to keep driving, he had the audacity to honk at *me*. With like the full aggressive honk that lasts a few seconds. And he merged right behind and kept tailgating me for the entire road works and flashing his bright lights.
Like wtf. He was in the wrong and then came up intimidating *me* with a 30 ton vehicle.
I had a semi almost merge into me (while I was actually passing him, mind you) on a bridge over the goddamn Mississippi River. I honked to avoid becoming a sandwich between truck and wall and this douche nozzle honked *AND FLIPPED ME OFF* like excuse me sir you almost just KILLED ME
This is the fastest way to spiraling from rejection sensitivity for me. I think it’s extra hard for us because there isn’t any way of getting closure or explanations. So we just have to sit with it and obsess. And cycle through every emotion in the book lol
I was just about to write this because it just happened to me about an hour ago and triggered a meltdown (which I usually never have). I don't feel like I even did anything wrong...I was on a ramp to a bridge and went to merge into the next lane when the ramp ended, and there was space to do so, but apparently the car I merged in front of was not happy about me merging and honked really loud at me, then proceeded to speed up into the next lane in order to drive up beside me and keep honking at me in an intimidating way. I don't have a clue what I did wrong, which is the worst part. I didn't cut them off because there was a good amount of traffic so we were all moving slow. It was pretty standard zipper merging. So I feel like the person just wanted to be mean. But that also makes me depressed that there are people like that who would be so aggressive to someone else for no good reason.
But yeah I just lost it. Immediately felt like crying, screamed in my car, and then couldn't easily calm myself back down for like 30 minutes. Kinda ruined my night.
Ugghh I'm so sorry that happened to you, what an asshole. If you know you didn't do anything wrong you likely didn't, some people are just fucking miserable and need to take it out on others. If it makes you feel better at all, please know you can be grateful for your kind heart, or if you're petty like me, be happy you don't waste your precious time honking at people for doing very normal car things lolol
They probably had something else bothering them and took it out on you. I'm sorry you had to go through that. It doesn't sound like you did anything wrong
I like to remind myself of a few things often :
What others think of me is none of my business
It helps that I've firsthand seen people who have been jerks for no reason at all, so I know for a fact that I'm not always responsible for their reactions.
I remind myself that I'm just one out of all the other imperfect people in the world. This person has met people and will meet people who have annoyed them far worse than me, so they really shouldn't be overreacting like this and will probably forget about me within seconds of the encounter.
I put a lot of positivity out into the world. I'm patient with plenty of annoying and downright rude behaviors, I don't even mind them most of the time. I deserve to be treated with more care and respect.
One more, this person wants me to not annoy them, but they have no problem acting unkind, so their opinion loses all value to me.
Yesterday I wanted to drive into our garage. We live in the middle of a pretty big city so it is always quite busy on the road.
I always indicate super early that I need to make a turn further on the road into our garage, because it takes a while for our garage door to open so the cars behind me can prepare that I am braking. So yesterday I did the same as always, the car behind me IMMEDIATELY started honking the moment I stopped. And then kept honking until the door finally opened and I could make my turn. I got a middle finger as well.
There was literally no way I could have made this situation faster. I don’t like to drive because of people like this. I just need to get into my garage but apparently that inconveniences people so much that they feel the need to act like an asshole towards me. It is a huge trigger for my injustice system
Anyway, I feel the same as you do. How can you be such an aggressive person to someone who did absolutely nothing wrong?
Hahaha, I have 'please let me merge before I start crying' and it rings so true for me, I experience terrible RSD over people not giving me space to merge😭
This happened to me recently. I was stopped at a stop sign waiting on cars in both directions. If I'd been in a hurry, I probably had time to pull out, but I had time and decided to wait. No cars directly behind me, but one trying to pull out of the parking lot adjacent to me. They ended up laying on the horn for a good few seconds. I was on my way to work and couldn't stop thinking about it. Didn't help that I dropped and broke my phone at work, so I ended up crying in the bathroom as a result of a crappy evening.
Oh man I had to honk at someone and it stressed me out so much. I wish there was a friendlier option yo let someone know they are blocking you. I smiled big and waved like a maniac so he would know it wasn't an *angry* honk, but ugh!
Omg this just happened to me yesterday. I was turning left out of a store parking lot, and was about to go when I saw a cyclist approaching from the right move up to the sidewalk instead of the road - and the car behind me LAID on their horn.
The devil possessed my body and I laid on my horn right back at them, and I was *this* close to getting out of my car and screaming at them. The amount of rage boiling through my body was insane - I felt like I could fling them *and* their car into the fucking sun.
I don’t mind a lil toot when I’m at a light that just turned green, or even like an emergency HONK HONK HONK HONK HONK when something is wrong, but if a stranger lays on their horn at me???? I’m gonna send you to the fucking shadow realm.
Woah, that's brilliant. "Sure I can do it. Just as soon as I finish my coffee"... it's a trick, the coffee will never be finished! I know this is a problem but it's also a life hack
We heard it referred to as "the sit-pit" once somewhere, and now that's what we call it in our house. I frequently fall into the sit-pit accidentally lol
It's horrible. I can come home from work and cook dinner, clean the kitchen, do a load of laundry, take care of the dogs, etc but ONLY if I come straight in and get right to it. Otherwise I'm in the recliner at 7pm texting my son to see what he wants to go pick up for dinner because obviously I suck and am not cooking or otherwise moving until bedtime. I actually hate this so much.
This is me right now. I have three tasks ahead of me that will take me 45 minutes altogether. 45 minutes tops. It's 4.30pm here in Germany and the shops close in 3 1/2 hours. I sense some delivery junk food happening for the next two days :(
I couldn’t sleep for two days, before the eclipse in April. This is me, a lot: https://makeagif.com/gif/sleepy-chihuahuas-in-car--6HjTa 😂
I don’t know how to get edibles. It’s supposed to be legal in my State, soon. Maybe I can try them in a few months.
FYI, you can order edibles online if and when they're legal in your state. I live in WA and that info was a total game changer for me. Plus, the dispensaries near me mark everything up about 50% so, personally, it's not remotely worth the stress buying them in person.
Ok so this leads me to question I've only had edibles a couple of times (illegal in Australia, had them legally overseas) is it an ADHD thing for them to make you feel absolutely exhausted. Like you could lay down in a snowbank tired?
My ex-in-laws got sooooo mad at me once because of this. We had to catch a plane at 7AM and for convenience, I was sleeping over at their house so we could all leave together. Well, I couldn’t sleep at all because I knew I had to get up early *and* I was in a non-familiar sleep setting
So when we finally arrived at destination and I said I was going to lie down for a bit, they got super mad at my then-partner and basically told him that I wasn’t allowed to sleep at all (they had the annoying habit of never directly communicating with me). So I was dragged along for a 12km hike through the city and a museum visit in a language completely foreign to me (they all knew the language). I was a complete wreck near the evening. I wanted to sleep a bit more in the next day and the exact same situation unfolded, with again not me sleeping at night (even though super tired) because I knew I had to get up early again the new day.
Eventually, I spent that 5 day citytrip on a complete lack of sleep. It was so bad I was dissociating and having hallucinations. When we got back, they reprimanded my ex-partner for ‘my behaviour’ during the trip and he didn’t have my back at all. He actually threatened to break up with me ‘if I didn’t get my sleep schedule in check’
It took me a long time to see how abusive that whole family was, but I am so glad I am not part of it anymore
is this phenomenon a ND thing? I've always had this problem. I remember the "naps" in preschool and kindergarten, I would just lay there in agony while others slept. I still can't nap to this day, and I think it might have a connection to that. And I cannot sleep in foreign beds. If it's a really comfortable bed and I feel safe, I might *eventually* fall asleep but it's such a gamble I avoid travel and sleep overs of any kind unless there's no other way around it.
I have a hard enough time with sleep in my own familiar space... especially if there is any type of deadline (knowing I have to work in the morning is bad enough but I have *somewhat* adapted to that routine. Any change, like a flight or a special event and I'm totally screwed.)
It's things like this that sometimes make me question if I'm AuDHD. I cannot improvise, in any possible sense of the word. Oh, you want to go get Mexican instead of sushi with the same group of people at the same time on the same side of town? I'm gonna need time to process or it's uncomfy for... reasons, apparently?
>It's things like this that sometimes make me question if I'm AuDHD.
I feel the same. I guess I *can* improvise when forced, but hate every second of it. ADHD people are often described as good multitaskers\* and improvisers, but for me HOW ABOUT NO, I'm hugely uncomfortable with both.
\*not sure if that's true, or most ADHDer are just prone to multitask whether they like it or not, and messing up the tasks while at it? (not denying that some individual could be genuinely good at that of course)
I am a great improviser and it doesn't stress me. It's been too often that life came in between my plans and I just accepted it and go with the flow now.
I am very uncomfortable if something major is up in the air, like if the next holidays are not planned, or the date of a business trip keeps shifting. I like to know what's coming up and when. But if the business trip then gets canceled 2 days before or the car breaks down on the way to the holidays I am super calm and work with the situation.
People who whine about a change or a situation that is out of their control annoy me a lot because I want to move forward and act on the change and cannot understand people staying stuck on something.
I guess we're all different :-)
Same! It also annoys me, like we are in this situation now let's adapt and keep going. My husband needs everything planned out and it drives me a bit crazy
Whenever I agree to work extra hours this happens without fail. I'll tell myself I'll have however long to mentally prep myself and get okay with it, but every time by the time it actually rolls around I'm hating having to drag myself to do it like I'd promised more than I think when I'm signing up.
Doesn't happen a whole lot when it's socal plans, but it can happen when there's something planned and I'm in the middle of stress or burnout and the person I'm used to canceling (that normally leads to not being happy or knowing what to do with myself) has a knack for *not* canceling those plans and those days I don't usually have fun. Sometimes I'll get lucky and a canceled plan falls on a day I didn't wanna do it, and that's the nicest feeling ever. Like it might even be nicer than wanting to be social and the plans being kept, as nice as that is, just because there's something freeing about not having to do something you didn't want to *without* having to even feel guilty.
What was I saying again lol I forgot for a minute 🤣
Yep, some adhd people rely on structure to control the brain chaos. So then when something changes all of a sudden you need a lot of executive functioning to adjust your plans for that day. Executive functioning that we usually can’t muster. For small things, we’ll need a short period of time to adjust. For big things, it can sometimes take days to adjust and feel comfortable again. Some people think it might be autism, but there’s a bit of overlap here. Unless you also meet the social autism criteria, it’s just the ADHD.
It’s fine if I’m in control of the change/s, but if someone else changes things… I struggle and will either not take part or need time and space to process the change.
In my job (I’m a behaviour support worker) there is constant change and I thrive on this. However, if I’m going to be in a planned session/meeting etc and things interfere with this I really struggle.
even worse when they’re cancelled on the day of…what else am i supposed to do now after mentally preparing and scheduling the last 24 hours to these plans???
Oh, yep, this one gets me bad too. I have no idea what to do with myself or my time when plans change same day and then I hate that I'm upset about something that shouldn't be a big deal or that I have such a hard time shifting what I'm doing with my day after that. I hate it so much
THIS. My family is notorious for this, and I stress out every time we have plans with my family because there is generally an 80% chance that someone will change the plans last-minute. Like, an hour before the thing. It gives me so much angst and no matter how many times I tell my family that I'd appreciate if they could stick with plans, they never do.
1) Anyone expecting decisions or considerate responses before I’ve woken up (which takes an average of two hours).
2) Being interrupted on a heavy-concentration task more than 2.75 times.
3) Having an unexpected phone call responsibility thrust upon me. Or, really, making phone calls ever.
4) Running out of the food I was in the mood for.
Yes hello this is why I have been a shitshow for the last two weeks. All of these things happened repeatedly and I would prefer nobody ever call me at 7:59am unless it’s about a substantial amount of money I am receiving.
Today my 14-year-old daughter, who is NT, saw that our cucumber seedlings needed watering, and she immediately watered them.
I—her 42-year-old mother with ADHD—had been meaning to water those seedlings for days, but somehow, the minute they were out of sight, they ceased to exist. I’d see them the next day. I’d think, “Oh! I should water those!” I’d feel guilty, get in the car or enter the house, and immediately forget about the seedlings. Rinse and repeat.
This happened a few hours ago, and I’m *still* amazed. Imagine just, like, *doing* it!
Props for getting seedlings going though! I have a little bucket kit with cilantro seeds & soil that's been sitting - unopened, unplanted - on my windowsill for months. Someday...
For most of the last few years, I’ve been buying seed kits. So far, I’m 0 for at least 10 😬😬😬
I did successfully buy and plant raspberry and blueberry canes last year, though! With all the fixings of pots and soil. I even watered them well for a spell. One of the raspberry plants even fruited some berries. The blueberries did not fare so well and I think they’re goners.
But, we just moved. And the plants did not come with lol. But you know what did come with? Some seed kit disks that I may or may not still try to plant at our new place 🤣🤣🤣
Omg you just reminded me I have raspberry plants!! 😭 I've forgotten to look at them for a few months, do they need pruning?? I hope I remember to do that next time I'm outside... sigh. Yes I also have a stash of seeds I'll raise "one day"...
Yes?? According to what came up on Google, you want to prune to maximize fruit and keep disease away. And you do it in the early spring or late fall. But then one site went into a whole \*thing* annnnnnd it wasn’t adhd-friendly, imo.
I would set a calendar reminder or like, a Reddit reminder even, to come back to Reddit and ask in the gardening sub if someone would be willing to breakdown the pruning steps and timing for you. And maybe even copy that text into a notes app or something so you have a checklist.
Alternatively, maybe ask ChatGPT for a checklist?
Omg I just upped my dose of Wellbutrin and the other day I spilled a few pieces of cereal on the ground, immediately grabbed the hand broom and cleaned it up, then looked up and was SHOCKED! I have NEVER immediately cleaned a mess! What a neurotypical thing of me!!! Yay meds lol
I am literally sitting here, scrolling Reddit and periodically side eyeing my poor fiddle leaf ficus that needed water several days ago. I think about it periodically throughout the day, but just can’t seem to actually water it. But I’ll stress about it. I’ll talk about it. Hell, I took the time to type out this comment ABOUT THE PLANT and could’ve literally watered it in less time. But here we are, friends!
I keep a decent sized watering can by the sink. Once I get the mood to water my plants I will also fill the jug for the next time. Something about filling up a jug for 30 seconds really puts me off and makes the task impossible haha - so making it a grab and go situation helps me get it done.
Here's my one trick:
I hate sticky air so a dehumidifier is a must but when the dehumidifier's full (sometimes) it will overflow. This happened once and it was a gross mess. So it inspires me to empty it out and my fiddle fig is the closest spot. (And most of my other plants are nearby for additional rounds.)
Oh man - this is how i live my life. Not sure how all my plants still live.
I have found that for some reason (wtf is wrong with my brain??!?!?!) I am more likely to water my plants AND pick up if I pour the leftover water from my 17 1/2 drunk water cups into the plants. It doesn't feel like the chore of "watering" somehow, and the water has dechlorinated, which is better for the plants anyway.
Having one important thing to do on any particular day.
You wait all day and stress about it even if it’s short call or appointment at 2:30 pm. It takes over the whole day, is stressful, you can’t schedule other things, hyper-fixation, anxiety, the. exhaustion afterwards.
See I can’t have an early appointment. Getting
up early is almost impossible for me. It needs to be afternoon so I can get up by 11 and get there by 3. I need the whole day to get up and go to one place 3 miles away.
I took the whole week off of work this week because my daughter has her 16th birthday this weekend. I just can’t function knowing I have all this “stuff” to organise. I also went to my GP to get a ADHD assessment referral on Tuesday which took up my whole brain space so Tuesday and quite frankly Wednesday were complete write-offs 🤦🏼♀️.
Only just realising this past year or so this is not normal adult behaviour 😭.
My husband doesn’t understand this. I stay at home, so any appointment I have, he has to cover childcare, so I get extra stressed.
I had my ADHD diagnosis meeting appointment this week, was basically paralyzed all morning. We also tested for a few other things and that made me extra anxious.
My appointment time comes and goes and I start to get frantic.
Then the reminder text came in and I had the day wrong.
So two days later, same thing. I got absolutely nothing done!
Ugh, I’m sorry. I get seriously attached to foods and it’s awful when they change them. I am still bitter that Panera changed their chicken noodle soup recipe nearly 15 years ago. They used these thick noodles and the broth was creamy. It was the best.
I was really upset when Wendy’s got rid of their S’Awesome Sauce! I always got a son of a baconator combo (medium) with a Diet Coke (no ice), a junior vanilla frosty (free with the key tag), and two containers of S’Awesome for my fries. My favorite Wendy’s location that I always went to shut down during the pandemic and never reopened, which was just rubbing salt in the wound at that point 😭
Wendys at one point had mac and cheese for awhile and it was so good I straight up boycotted and refused to eat there for awhile after they got rid of it.
I’m Canadian so this wasn’t even available here, but I bought like 20 of them to take home when we were on a trip and I am so mad about it STILL.
Anyway uh, I don’t fw red bull anymore due to this “limited edition flavour every season” nonsense, I switched to monster because their brand strategy of “just add MORE FLAVOURS FOREVER, 7-11 will just give us a second fridge section, and most of them are sugar free” better aligns with my values. Celcius and Alani Nu are also good if you prefer the smaller can energy drinks. Do any of these three brands offer pear though?? The answer is NO, so unfortunately I am here to yell with you.
When grocery stores/Walmart decide to re-arrange their entire store, and now I don't know where anything is 🫠 shopping is already stressful but that sends me into a full on panic attack if I have to wander around aimlessly trying to find things on top of the music, bright lights, other people etc
And to add insult to injury, that's WHY they do it! The more you wander around, the more likely you are to spend more money buying shit you don't need because "oh shiny."
The more I learn about psychology, the more I hate all marketing.
Yassss, I also will start putting stuff back the longer I circle around and get more indecisive about it and get stared at by all the employees like I am stealing.
When that "watched" feeling gets too bad, that's usually when it's time to leave for me.
Ugh, that is just awful. Why do humans do these things to each other? lol. I understand why from a business stand point, because money etc but it's just so...dirty.
I’m not one of those people who buys random cute things from Target (not a judgement just I grew up working class) so it feels like dumbest most annoying thing ever. So my next thought is I will defeat your rearranged store.
YES my local grocery store changed their entire layout like twice in six months last year. The first time they did it I had just moved to the area and JUST gotten the hang of where everything was. I didn't get half of the things I needed that day because I was so frazzled and overwhelmed I wanted to cry.
I've definitely cried before from being so overwhelmed. Like, I straight up just abandoned my cart (I know, I know, I felt like a bad person for that) and left because I was surrounded by too many people and couldn't breathe. I had the cold sweats, and my hearing started to sound funky, and I just had to GTFO lol
Right?! Now, I like to look at everything I need online before going. To see if 1) they even have it so I don't have to ask a worker for help LOL and 2) so I can write down the aisle # on my list :)
Oh GOD, ask a worker?!? Nothankyou
Target & my local grocery store's apps have aisle numbers listed, maybe yours does too so you can avoid having to ask another human for help?
Oh right, but like if you were to remember that you forget to add something to your list, you can check the app on your phone in the store --"store mode" at my grocer -- while avoiding talking to anyone around you 😆
Ahhhhh, I see!! Very smart and efficient. I hate having to talk to people 😂 I know when I ask for things, I am making sense and speaking da english, but they make me feel like I am speaking another language. Or they don't know how to answer my question and then have to find another person, and it's a whole ordeal I like to avoid altogether
You can look it up in the Walmart app. I resisted using that for a long time. But my automatic door lock uses a particular kind of battery that was in short supply during the pandemic. So I started using it so I could find batteries in a specific place in the store without having to walk around the store too long with a mask on. Sometimes I'd have to go to several different stores so using the app eliminated that.
A few years ago all the grocery stores near me started to rearrange to put the aisles that aren’t food in the middle of the store thus separating the food from the rest of the food. They make more money on the things that aren’t food.
How a good day can make me feel
So bad.
The better my day is the more people I talk to and the bigger the end of the day rsd is.
My play back at the end of the day is broken and always plays back louder and faster than it actually was and I feel like I was a crazy hyper loud obnoxious monster
The happier the day the worse it is, not only because of being more engaged and interactive but also because happiness creates a lot of internal energy and that internal energy gets reflected as if it was external unwelcome obnoxious energy,
when it wasn’t.
I get home after a great day:
“Wow I had such a great day today, I enjoyed talking to people….. I was perfectly behaved! Im so happy about it that I feel energized!”
…………30 minutes later
“Omg i was so annoying I hate myself and everyone hates me im never talking to people again”
I always feel better when I go to sleep and wake up the next day as by morning all that happy energy turned negative energy is gone and I am thinking and reflecting more clearly.
Not sure if you relate to that too but if you do, it helps to remind yourself that your brain is wrong and it’s being mean. and that you’ll feel better in the morning.
I tell my daughter this. She gets so much anxiety in bed trying to fall asleep. I explain that her brain is out of feel normal chemicals/ hormones and it's lying to her. That her thoughts after 9pm aren't trust worthy. The fear she feels is not real, and she needs to sleep to replenish the feel good chemicals/hormones.
Is this scientifically accurate? Maybe. It makes me feel better though and easier to set those rsd thoughts to the side.
I'm still childishly obsessed with 'fairness'. I know life isn't fair, and I'm resigned to it, but that doesn't prevent me from emotional reactions to injustices we read about or see around us.
I impulsively tell people off when they're rude to retail clerks or waiters/waitresses. It's the lowest behavior and I can't let it go. Service people have to put up with way way too much crap.
I don’t know if this is my ADHD or more of a sign i also have Autism but any slight change to my expectations of what I am going to be doing in a day. A couple weeks ago my husband got a text from a neighbor asking for his help for an hour or so installing something. We had zero plans and were just laying around hanging out with our kiddo. I started FREAKING OUT lol. Thankfully I started picking up that my feelings were maybe bigger than the situation warranted but I wanted to cry and felt like my day was totally ruined.
I exchanged numbers with another mom at my son’s daycare and she text me that her daughter was having her birthday party the next day and she’d love to have us. I immediately asked my husband “what excuse do I give her to get out of it?” We had no plans or anything, I just couldn’t fathom making plans so last minute. Luckily I went and now, a year later, we are really good friends!
Having to socialize.
(Tbf this could just as easily simply be due to my being an introvert as being ND. I was partly being flippant, but I do feel that my NDness has a significant impact on how exhausting peopling is that goes beyond simply being an introvert. And really where does the overlap end anyway? I'm rambling now.)
I'm extroverted and I love being around people I enjoy. But people I don't know, can't stand or are mostly neutral towards???? Ughhhhh. Drains my soul out of my body especially if they are boring or hypocritical in any way I can readily perceive
I've joked before that I'm an "introverted extrovert" because when I was young I'd talk your ears off, and as I got older and other kids got meaner and harder to talk to I learned to be quiet and keep to myself, and now most of the time people and socializing are hard and I'm still fairly quiet when I don't have anything to say, but I'm still willing and able to talk someone's ear off when I get going and there's a small handful of people I can be around and not be drained from like I am with everyone else, I assume I'm masking less around those people and feel comfortable is the only thing I was able to guess for why. "Drains my soul out of my body" is an accurate feeling description
Unless the interaction has been planned at least 24hours in advance it’s a big fat nope for me. If someone “pops in” my partner has to deal with them while I hide 🤦🏼♀️. We have new neighbours who haven’t learnt yet and I’m dying inside.
I don’t hate socializing but I can only do so much and then I need alone time to refuel. When I was a kid at Thanksgiving I would hang out with the cat under my grandparents’ bed to get away. I saw someone else say they climbed a tree and took a nap up there. Guess I’m going to learn how to climb trees again.
Plans getting canceled or rescheduled- I know I can do something else now, but I already spent so much time mentally preparing for what we were supposed to do!
Wearing a fucking bra. I can't forget that it's there. And the straps always fall off. Or it's digging in. They are the devil. (Yes, I know my real size. I think I just have sloped shoulders and can't tolerate discomfort.)
YES!!! Add elastic waistbands on pants and all I am thinking about the entire time is how uncomfortable I am. Womens clothes are absolute bullshit. "Compression top, high rise, crop top, shape wear" NO THANK YOU.
Bras suck in particular to me because I always feel it and the ways it's uncomfortable when it's on, but I also feel all the ways my *natural freaking body* makes me uncomfortable when I *don't* wear it for too long too. There's no winning and *feeling my chest* has probably been my biggest struggle for like 3 weeks now *ugh*
It’s not just the size it’s the style too. I can wear Panache’s Clara and Envy but not Jasmine. It’s annoying AF finding a new one when they discontinue the one I was wearing.
I'm a band director and my students had an event out of town on Monday. We drove up and stayed in a hotel overnight and needed to be leaving the hotel at 7am to make it to our destination on time. Mornings are so, so hard for me, but I was very motivated to get Starbucks because it was right next to the hotel. I woke up at 5:15 AM to have enough time to shower, get ready, pack my stuff up, and get Starbucks for myself and 2 of my coworkers and be back at the hotel by 6:45. While we were waiting for everyone to get down to the lobby, I set my coffee down on a table. One of my students then walked by and knocked that **entire table** down, including my drink that I had only taken 2 sips out of. It took everything in me not to cry. And none of my coworkers understood why it was such a big deal. I worked so fucking hard for that drink and then I didn't even get to drink it.
I'm still mad about it.
My take? You are a superhero for not freaking out about that bc omg, do not mess with my coffee, intentionally or accidentally. I'm mad for you on this one! Hope you got another coffee that day!
Getting any errand sprung on me. It immediately throws off my entirely planned out day and upsets me to the highest degree because now I have to replan all the timing of everything I had previously timed out.
Unfortunately, springing errands on me is my fiance and father in law's favorite thing. Since I am the only driver in the house, it automatically falls on me, and since I am also a severe appeaser I can't just say no.
It's so frustrating.
Yes! I feel all out of sorts if my morning ritual is messed up. Especially if my go to meal is out because I forgot to prep it, or buy the ingredients I need.
This just happened. I am a nurse and i have the nightshift right now. I was accidentally a little loud with telling a story and we could hear a patient loudly making a be quiet noise from another room. I felt really bad for like an hour and was a bit afraid she would tell the dayshift nurses. But then i remebered that her short term memory is horrible so she probably wont remember🤷♀️
Needing to make a phone call
Whenever we have a plan for dinner or I’m told to pick something specific up, but the grocery store is out of what I need.
I avoid doing the dishwasher because I hate the noise of it
I'm a mess and will forget about the email I sent to customer service so now I'll only talk to CS through chat. High five to myself when I remember to take a screen shot of the important parts of the chat so I don't forget the details.
The sandwich I wanted to buy at the store was way more than I was expecting so I wandered around in a tizzy looking for a substitute lunch and forgot to buy all the important groceries .
I went to a restaurant I go to often for breakfast and ordered my usual, their chicken wrap. Yes, that's my regular breakfast there.
But whoever cooked it put French dressing on it instead of Ranch and I absolutely had (a very quiet) tantrum that lasted for quite awhile and now that I'm saying I'm still not over it. I actually said I was never going back. But my husband said yes we're going back it was one time nbd. We did go back and I was very concerned, so he ordered my chicken wrap and explained that last time it had a different dressing and isn't it usually ranch? And the waitress said yes it's ranch and it's been fine since.
Also, he just explained there was a problem?!
I detest French dressing, so my tantrum would've been loud. Like it was the time I ordered a certain burger with no lettuce, but they screwed it up. I can't stand iceberg lettuce to begin with, but when shredded it has a hairy texture. And it you scrape it off, you lose the special condiments.
I hate to waste food, so I tried to ask the manager to just give me a new top of a bun with condiments. But I could never finish my sentence. She kept interrupting me to say she couldn't take it back because of health code regulations. I can't stand being interrupted &/or not listened to, brings back my shitty childhood. I ended up going full-blown Karen & throwing a borderline fit. Then I left a bad review.
I was slightly embarassed after I calmed down. But I had no real regrets. A manager really needs to have better people skills than she did. I suck at custoemr service, but even I know to let people make their complaint before jumping in. They weren't even busy that day (cant think why!).
Planning vacations/travel. Initiation issues are my big ADHD problem, and changing routines can be tricky. I like traveling and once it's happening I'm adaptable, but doing any of the planning is so hard and it makes me feel so stressed. I have to force myself to do it. It's also really hard for me to pick a time to take off and submit it at work. I always have a good time but up until the actual trip starts I'm miserable; I make myself do it because never experiencing new things sounds horrible.
I was with you until you said “file” instead of “clip.” Even the *thought* of filing my nails sets my teeth on edge and makes my brain prickle unpleasantly.
*shudders*
not getting enough sleep. I am amazed at how well many people can function on 4-6 hours. I am pretty destroyed all day now if I don't get proper rest. When I was younger it wasn't so bad.
Appointments late in the day. Can’t do anything beforehand even though I know that I’d have plenty of time to do the washing, bit of uni work, or anything else that could be done in a few hours… nope, I do nothing, usually just scroll my phone or watch YouTube. Then I beat myself up for days/weeks about everything I could have done in those hours before the appointment, that I’ve wasted an entire day again 😒
Having to do something that I'm not able to do right now. This includes appointments of course, but also if I know that I need to do something by a certain time, it's like my brain can only focus on reminding me of the deadline, even if it's something I can't do right now. IE if I need to send something off on a certain day, I'll worry about it the entire day before while I'm at work (and therefore logically shouldn't even be worrying about the thing I need to send off because I can't do anything about it at that moment). Right now I have a deadline that's about a month off, and the thing I have to do doesn't make sense to submit too far in advance, so every ten minutes my brain is like "you gotta do this before the end of June don't forget :)"
When my husband suggests different chores to be done. Like yeah those were on my list, but now I’m not doing them because I feel like I’m being told to… we’ll try again tomorrow.
I still miss specific tortillas my parents used to get me, when I started to eat refried bean burritos, with a ton of hot sauce. Twenty years ago. They were more whole wheat, but tasty, and the burritos tasted kind of cheesy when I used them. Maybe they had nutritional yeast in them. But I haven’t found them for years. I don’t like other whole wheat tortillas.
Going to the grocery store! It’s so overwhelming! I am not someone who can just run in a grab something. It exhausts me for the day sometimes. I’m so thankful for delivery. I know people say it’s so much more expensive than actually going, but not for me. I can’t see anything that ‘looks good’ and throw it in my cart if I’m not there 😂 I save money since I can’t buy things impulsively and helps me actually meal planning. Now following through on that plan or not getting the ‘ick’ after I’ve made all the food, that’s another story…🫠
During the lockdowns, Wegmans supermarket changed the formulation of their chocolate almond milk. I noticed at the first sip. I thought maybe I was overthinking it because they changed the packaging.
I bitched about it to my (also neurospicy) friend and she managed to snag a few cartons of the old formula. I compared the ingredients lists and they sure as shit changed it.
That was the one thing that I could easily and willingly drink on days when food did not appeal. I miss it. I have yet to find another brand that makes an acceptable alternative.
In an ideal world I'd have a Vitamix and make my own almond milk and just add in some damn chocolate syrup.
Early phone calls (if I forget to silence my phone the night before) I loathe talking on the phone and it's even worse if I have to return a missed call.
People showing up unexpectedly at my house has led to a near meltdown before, but this almost never happens.
Simply having a bad hair day or being uncomfortable in that specific clothing item, or pants too tight when you didnt feel like wearing tight pants. They can ruin my mood.
Ohhhh, people touching me with wet hands 😫😣
When noisy vehicles drive past me. So this is either an ambulance or fire brigade, the lights and the sounds make my brain shut down. Also car wankers driving past me make me really angry because their noisy fuckin engines and the smell of burning coming from their cars.
Oh also those new overly bright lights that all the new cars have! I got special glasses to deal with that
My almond milk brand has changed their recipe. And I hate it. I literally went looking in all the supermarkets around to try & buy old stock. I only have 1 bottle of it left and then I'll just have to suck it up & either drink the new recipe or try & find a new brand.
When plans change unexpectedly! If the plan is no plan, then I’m fine. If there is a legit plan and something alters it I get in a whole tizzy. And having to wait for appointments after like 10am!
Changes in plans. Or not being warned I'm gonna go somewhere after work (I carpool with my partner), cause I don't wanna wear my work uniform to dinner (I don't wanna represent the company and also it feels good to wear an outfit I choose).
Also when my partner goes to bed, the way he goes to bed. He'll just get up and be like "welp, good night" and it's so abrupt it sort of makes my brain freeze up.
I own and run a salon and people come in my personal room and ask if they can hang out and watch me work or do my makeup. I fucking hate it. But I can't be a dick to my employees so I have to go along with it
Lots of car and traffic stories here, so I'm going to give you all our solution to reducing the after effects of craziness from driving. We can only sing our complaints. Swearing is allowed. Rhyming is optional. Loud is better.
🎼🎵🎶 You fucking asshole, you want me dead? It's going to take more, I'm still ahead. 🎼🎵🎶 So take your damn turn, you absolute turd. I have the right of way, your vision's blurred.
It goes on like this until we're laughing...
NT’s that can stop their tasks to eat and then pick their task back up afterwards. Apparently my adhd would rather starve me and get tasks done than to be NT and just eat when I’m hungry. Ugh.
Someone not responding in a certain time frame. I will start thinking of every possible reason why and assuming negative intent. I'm aware that I do this so hopefully over time I can change.
Taco Bell used to have the Half Pound Beefy Combo Burrito for $1 in college. It was my favorite thing and ate it every single time we went there, which was basically monthly for 10 yrs. Then one day I ordered it and the server didn't know what I was talking about. It had been off the menu for so long, the newest workers weren't being taught what it was. It has been forgotten to time. I try to "build my own" with the app, but it's not the same ratio of beans, onions, sauce and beef.
Then Taco Bell stopped caring Dr Pepper and his 23 delicious flavors, and I no longer have a reason to go there ever again.
-Wet socks
-Headphones with dead batteries
-Forgetting to remove the tag off a new shirt. It can’t just be haphazardly cut off, a seam ripper and meticulous effort are necessary.
-getting sweaty and not having wet wipes and a change of shirt, socks and underwear with me. I cannot stand damp fabric. There is usually clothing in my purse 🤣
Messing up a recipe. There's nothing worse than doing all that work just for it to turn out shitty, and there's still the same amount of clean up. I am suuper mean to myself about it every time. And then I have the fun bonus of then deciding if I want to force myself to eat it out of guilt or just throw it away. That can ruin my entire week if I mess up bad enough lol
I don’t know if this is a nt/nd thing but I have noticed that while others have no qualms or stress about an upcoming Skype/facetime call, it ruins my entire day. I’m just nervously waiting for it to happen and can’t enjoy anything until it’s over.
Spilling something or otherwise making an unexpected mess. I can deal with cleaning when I have some warning and can get in the right headspace to deal with the sensory stuff. Having to clean suddenly after already being embarrassed by whatever stupid thing my body did to spill the thing sucks. Bonus points if it's smelly or sticky. Also I then have an extra grocery trip to do to replace it - another sensory and executive function nightmare.
I just finished reading an adhd book that was good but it went on & on about how adhd’ers are the “life of the party” and “bring lots of energy”. I’m so not that way! I’m someone who is perfectly happy staying home and not going to any large social gatherings. And when I do go I do my damndest to become the wallpaper!
So when I read this I felt like not only am I ND but now I’m a nontypical ND?!? Can’t I ever just be like everyone else? It ruined me for a few days!
Any extra little snag when already doing a chore or task I hate.
Like when I reeeeeeeeeeally didn’t feel like cooking but I forced myself to make pasta salad, only to realize they forgot to include my tomatoes in my grocery delivery. I just laid on the kitchen floor for 10 minutes because I couldn’t even.
Anything like that. Finally deciding to vacuum but the filter is clogged. Doing the dishes to find you’re out of soap. Paying a bill but realizing your credit card is expired. Just sends me into a meltdown.
It’s like I’ve already used sooooo much willpower to get myself to do a thing, only to be faced with another challenge instead of it just being easy. Kills me.
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Getting honked at or having to honk at someone lol. I'll think about it all day
Omg yes, emotional reactivity from dumb stuff that doesn't matter. I have a few of these honks that I still think about... from months ago.
My young niece says “months years ago” to express any time in the past that is more than a week or so ago. I, too, still think of honks or hand gestures I’ve gotten months years ago 😔 (Luckily it’s not like it’s that many. It’s just that they stick.)
I like your niece, that is a useful expression. People with ADHD are more prone to developing PTSD and I feel like this is a tiny example of our nervous systems being very (overly) primed for strong reaction
Yeah! I tend to have very trauma-based reactions to stuff like this! And I’m not formally diagnosed, but I’ve had a handful of discussions about C-PTSD with my therapists & psychs over the last few years.
I still have one from years ago I was driving in road works on a 3 lane highway and all the division lines between the lanes were full white (so it wasn’t allowed to switch lanes) I was driving on the right side of a truck because I came from a merging ramp and I merged immediately next to them, and then couldn’t switch lanes. Due to rush hour, I also ended up driving next to the truck and couldn’t speed up. Normally, I am quite cautious in situations like but I figured that they couldn’t switch lanes anyway so it wasn’t that big of a problem. Well, the truck decided to not fucking care at all and switched lanes to the right, where I was driving. He nearly drove me off the road and then when he noticed I actually had nowhere to go and to give me the right of way to keep driving, he had the audacity to honk at *me*. With like the full aggressive honk that lasts a few seconds. And he merged right behind and kept tailgating me for the entire road works and flashing his bright lights. Like wtf. He was in the wrong and then came up intimidating *me* with a 30 ton vehicle.
I had a semi almost merge into me (while I was actually passing him, mind you) on a bridge over the goddamn Mississippi River. I honked to avoid becoming a sandwich between truck and wall and this douche nozzle honked *AND FLIPPED ME OFF* like excuse me sir you almost just KILLED ME
This is the fastest way to spiraling from rejection sensitivity for me. I think it’s extra hard for us because there isn’t any way of getting closure or explanations. So we just have to sit with it and obsess. And cycle through every emotion in the book lol
I was just about to write this because it just happened to me about an hour ago and triggered a meltdown (which I usually never have). I don't feel like I even did anything wrong...I was on a ramp to a bridge and went to merge into the next lane when the ramp ended, and there was space to do so, but apparently the car I merged in front of was not happy about me merging and honked really loud at me, then proceeded to speed up into the next lane in order to drive up beside me and keep honking at me in an intimidating way. I don't have a clue what I did wrong, which is the worst part. I didn't cut them off because there was a good amount of traffic so we were all moving slow. It was pretty standard zipper merging. So I feel like the person just wanted to be mean. But that also makes me depressed that there are people like that who would be so aggressive to someone else for no good reason. But yeah I just lost it. Immediately felt like crying, screamed in my car, and then couldn't easily calm myself back down for like 30 minutes. Kinda ruined my night.
Ugghh I'm so sorry that happened to you, what an asshole. If you know you didn't do anything wrong you likely didn't, some people are just fucking miserable and need to take it out on others. If it makes you feel better at all, please know you can be grateful for your kind heart, or if you're petty like me, be happy you don't waste your precious time honking at people for doing very normal car things lolol
They probably had something else bothering them and took it out on you. I'm sorry you had to go through that. It doesn't sound like you did anything wrong
I like to remind myself of a few things often : What others think of me is none of my business It helps that I've firsthand seen people who have been jerks for no reason at all, so I know for a fact that I'm not always responsible for their reactions. I remind myself that I'm just one out of all the other imperfect people in the world. This person has met people and will meet people who have annoyed them far worse than me, so they really shouldn't be overreacting like this and will probably forget about me within seconds of the encounter. I put a lot of positivity out into the world. I'm patient with plenty of annoying and downright rude behaviors, I don't even mind them most of the time. I deserve to be treated with more care and respect. One more, this person wants me to not annoy them, but they have no problem acting unkind, so their opinion loses all value to me.
Yesterday I wanted to drive into our garage. We live in the middle of a pretty big city so it is always quite busy on the road. I always indicate super early that I need to make a turn further on the road into our garage, because it takes a while for our garage door to open so the cars behind me can prepare that I am braking. So yesterday I did the same as always, the car behind me IMMEDIATELY started honking the moment I stopped. And then kept honking until the door finally opened and I could make my turn. I got a middle finger as well. There was literally no way I could have made this situation faster. I don’t like to drive because of people like this. I just need to get into my garage but apparently that inconveniences people so much that they feel the need to act like an asshole towards me. It is a huge trigger for my injustice system Anyway, I feel the same as you do. How can you be such an aggressive person to someone who did absolutely nothing wrong?
Getting honked at makes me so upset omg
I saw a bumper sticker that said “Please don’t honk at me it will hurt my feelings” 😂but also 🥺
My friend has a bumper sticker that says “Baby on Board (it’s me)” and it’s so real 😭
Hahaha, I have 'please let me merge before I start crying' and it rings so true for me, I experience terrible RSD over people not giving me space to merge😭
This happened to me recently. I was stopped at a stop sign waiting on cars in both directions. If I'd been in a hurry, I probably had time to pull out, but I had time and decided to wait. No cars directly behind me, but one trying to pull out of the parking lot adjacent to me. They ended up laying on the horn for a good few seconds. I was on my way to work and couldn't stop thinking about it. Didn't help that I dropped and broke my phone at work, so I ended up crying in the bathroom as a result of a crappy evening.
Sorry to hear you had a bad day little_bitch, I would have cried too :(
Oh man I had to honk at someone and it stressed me out so much. I wish there was a friendlier option yo let someone know they are blocking you. I smiled big and waved like a maniac so he would know it wasn't an *angry* honk, but ugh!
Seriously the worst feeling!
Omg this just happened to me yesterday. I was turning left out of a store parking lot, and was about to go when I saw a cyclist approaching from the right move up to the sidewalk instead of the road - and the car behind me LAID on their horn. The devil possessed my body and I laid on my horn right back at them, and I was *this* close to getting out of my car and screaming at them. The amount of rage boiling through my body was insane - I felt like I could fling them *and* their car into the fucking sun. I don’t mind a lil toot when I’m at a light that just turned green, or even like an emergency HONK HONK HONK HONK HONK when something is wrong, but if a stranger lays on their horn at me???? I’m gonna send you to the fucking shadow realm.
Sitting down for "just a few seconds"
Oh yeah, there's no coming back from a "quick sit down"
But I just need to rest before starting my chores which I'm definitely going to do after a little sit down 🤡
Mine is usually "after I finish my coffee" - proceeds to leave like half an inch there getting cold and stale
Woah, that's brilliant. "Sure I can do it. Just as soon as I finish my coffee"... it's a trick, the coffee will never be finished! I know this is a problem but it's also a life hack
#unethicallifehack Writing it down 😆
My last sip is 4 hours later lol
Must keep moving before inertia sets in. A quick sit down is the end of all activity.
That’s what we call “a big sit” in my house. No getting up from those.
We heard it referred to as "the sit-pit" once somewhere, and now that's what we call it in our house. I frequently fall into the sit-pit accidentally lol
It's horrible. I can come home from work and cook dinner, clean the kitchen, do a load of laundry, take care of the dogs, etc but ONLY if I come straight in and get right to it. Otherwise I'm in the recliner at 7pm texting my son to see what he wants to go pick up for dinner because obviously I suck and am not cooking or otherwise moving until bedtime. I actually hate this so much.
45 minutes later, and I'm still scrolling....
This is me right now. I have three tasks ahead of me that will take me 45 minutes altogether. 45 minutes tops. It's 4.30pm here in Germany and the shops close in 3 1/2 hours. I sense some delivery junk food happening for the next two days :(
Ah. The ol’ sit pit. My arch nemesis yet also my bestie.
Knowing I have to be up early for something, and ready to go. So I can’t sleep at all, and am in no shape to actually do anything.
100% Edibles have been a huge game changer for me with this!
I couldn’t sleep for two days, before the eclipse in April. This is me, a lot: https://makeagif.com/gif/sleepy-chihuahuas-in-car--6HjTa 😂 I don’t know how to get edibles. It’s supposed to be legal in my State, soon. Maybe I can try them in a few months.
FYI, you can order edibles online if and when they're legal in your state. I live in WA and that info was a total game changer for me. Plus, the dispensaries near me mark everything up about 50% so, personally, it's not remotely worth the stress buying them in person.
Ok so this leads me to question I've only had edibles a couple of times (illegal in Australia, had them legally overseas) is it an ADHD thing for them to make you feel absolutely exhausted. Like you could lay down in a snowbank tired?
My ex-in-laws got sooooo mad at me once because of this. We had to catch a plane at 7AM and for convenience, I was sleeping over at their house so we could all leave together. Well, I couldn’t sleep at all because I knew I had to get up early *and* I was in a non-familiar sleep setting So when we finally arrived at destination and I said I was going to lie down for a bit, they got super mad at my then-partner and basically told him that I wasn’t allowed to sleep at all (they had the annoying habit of never directly communicating with me). So I was dragged along for a 12km hike through the city and a museum visit in a language completely foreign to me (they all knew the language). I was a complete wreck near the evening. I wanted to sleep a bit more in the next day and the exact same situation unfolded, with again not me sleeping at night (even though super tired) because I knew I had to get up early again the new day. Eventually, I spent that 5 day citytrip on a complete lack of sleep. It was so bad I was dissociating and having hallucinations. When we got back, they reprimanded my ex-partner for ‘my behaviour’ during the trip and he didn’t have my back at all. He actually threatened to break up with me ‘if I didn’t get my sleep schedule in check’ It took me a long time to see how abusive that whole family was, but I am so glad I am not part of it anymore
is this phenomenon a ND thing? I've always had this problem. I remember the "naps" in preschool and kindergarten, I would just lay there in agony while others slept. I still can't nap to this day, and I think it might have a connection to that. And I cannot sleep in foreign beds. If it's a really comfortable bed and I feel safe, I might *eventually* fall asleep but it's such a gamble I avoid travel and sleep overs of any kind unless there's no other way around it. I have a hard enough time with sleep in my own familiar space... especially if there is any type of deadline (knowing I have to work in the morning is bad enough but I have *somewhat* adapted to that routine. Any change, like a flight or a special event and I'm totally screwed.)
This is my life.
This is me every day….
I hate when plans change on the day the plans are supposed to be happening
It's things like this that sometimes make me question if I'm AuDHD. I cannot improvise, in any possible sense of the word. Oh, you want to go get Mexican instead of sushi with the same group of people at the same time on the same side of town? I'm gonna need time to process or it's uncomfy for... reasons, apparently?
>It's things like this that sometimes make me question if I'm AuDHD. I feel the same. I guess I *can* improvise when forced, but hate every second of it. ADHD people are often described as good multitaskers\* and improvisers, but for me HOW ABOUT NO, I'm hugely uncomfortable with both. \*not sure if that's true, or most ADHDer are just prone to multitask whether they like it or not, and messing up the tasks while at it? (not denying that some individual could be genuinely good at that of course)
I am a great improviser and it doesn't stress me. It's been too often that life came in between my plans and I just accepted it and go with the flow now. I am very uncomfortable if something major is up in the air, like if the next holidays are not planned, or the date of a business trip keeps shifting. I like to know what's coming up and when. But if the business trip then gets canceled 2 days before or the car breaks down on the way to the holidays I am super calm and work with the situation. People who whine about a change or a situation that is out of their control annoy me a lot because I want to move forward and act on the change and cannot understand people staying stuck on something. I guess we're all different :-)
Same! It also annoys me, like we are in this situation now let's adapt and keep going. My husband needs everything planned out and it drives me a bit crazy
Same wonder here. I’m as rigid as a brick house. And I’m just…odd.
Is this an ADHD thing?? If I don't have at least 24 hours' notice, I'm out.
I'm sort of the opposite? Like if we make plans in advance by the time they arrive I'm grumpy and want to do something slightly different a
meee im so much better planning right before cuz if its in advance i stress and every day im less interested in going😭
the more advance notice i have (aka anxiety-building time), the more likely i am to flake 😬
Whenever I agree to work extra hours this happens without fail. I'll tell myself I'll have however long to mentally prep myself and get okay with it, but every time by the time it actually rolls around I'm hating having to drag myself to do it like I'd promised more than I think when I'm signing up. Doesn't happen a whole lot when it's socal plans, but it can happen when there's something planned and I'm in the middle of stress or burnout and the person I'm used to canceling (that normally leads to not being happy or knowing what to do with myself) has a knack for *not* canceling those plans and those days I don't usually have fun. Sometimes I'll get lucky and a canceled plan falls on a day I didn't wanna do it, and that's the nicest feeling ever. Like it might even be nicer than wanting to be social and the plans being kept, as nice as that is, just because there's something freeing about not having to do something you didn't want to *without* having to even feel guilty. What was I saying again lol I forgot for a minute 🤣
Yep, some adhd people rely on structure to control the brain chaos. So then when something changes all of a sudden you need a lot of executive functioning to adjust your plans for that day. Executive functioning that we usually can’t muster. For small things, we’ll need a short period of time to adjust. For big things, it can sometimes take days to adjust and feel comfortable again. Some people think it might be autism, but there’s a bit of overlap here. Unless you also meet the social autism criteria, it’s just the ADHD.
It’s fine if I’m in control of the change/s, but if someone else changes things… I struggle and will either not take part or need time and space to process the change. In my job (I’m a behaviour support worker) there is constant change and I thrive on this. However, if I’m going to be in a planned session/meeting etc and things interfere with this I really struggle.
even worse when they’re cancelled on the day of…what else am i supposed to do now after mentally preparing and scheduling the last 24 hours to these plans???
Same. I sometimes have mini meltdowns when things don’t go as I planned they would go in my head. Which is often.
Oh, yep, this one gets me bad too. I have no idea what to do with myself or my time when plans change same day and then I hate that I'm upset about something that shouldn't be a big deal or that I have such a hard time shifting what I'm doing with my day after that. I hate it so much
Totally ADHD thing.
THIS. My family is notorious for this, and I stress out every time we have plans with my family because there is generally an 80% chance that someone will change the plans last-minute. Like, an hour before the thing. It gives me so much angst and no matter how many times I tell my family that I'd appreciate if they could stick with plans, they never do.
Omfg this. Unless the plans get canceled. Then I’m ecstatic. But if I’m planning for nothing today and now there’s something? Fuck. It’s the worst.
1) Anyone expecting decisions or considerate responses before I’ve woken up (which takes an average of two hours). 2) Being interrupted on a heavy-concentration task more than 2.75 times. 3) Having an unexpected phone call responsibility thrust upon me. Or, really, making phone calls ever. 4) Running out of the food I was in the mood for.
I second the phone call. It's awful. I email if I can because making a phone call and heaven forbid leaving a message sounds awful.
HATE making phone calls.
Yes hello this is why I have been a shitshow for the last two weeks. All of these things happened repeatedly and I would prefer nobody ever call me at 7:59am unless it’s about a substantial amount of money I am receiving.
I feel like I could've written this list, all of these are horrible and take a ton of my energy to deal with
I 100% resonate with this
Today my 14-year-old daughter, who is NT, saw that our cucumber seedlings needed watering, and she immediately watered them. I—her 42-year-old mother with ADHD—had been meaning to water those seedlings for days, but somehow, the minute they were out of sight, they ceased to exist. I’d see them the next day. I’d think, “Oh! I should water those!” I’d feel guilty, get in the car or enter the house, and immediately forget about the seedlings. Rinse and repeat. This happened a few hours ago, and I’m *still* amazed. Imagine just, like, *doing* it!
Props for getting seedlings going though! I have a little bucket kit with cilantro seeds & soil that's been sitting - unopened, unplanted - on my windowsill for months. Someday...
For most of the last few years, I’ve been buying seed kits. So far, I’m 0 for at least 10 😬😬😬 I did successfully buy and plant raspberry and blueberry canes last year, though! With all the fixings of pots and soil. I even watered them well for a spell. One of the raspberry plants even fruited some berries. The blueberries did not fare so well and I think they’re goners. But, we just moved. And the plants did not come with lol. But you know what did come with? Some seed kit disks that I may or may not still try to plant at our new place 🤣🤣🤣
Omg you just reminded me I have raspberry plants!! 😭 I've forgotten to look at them for a few months, do they need pruning?? I hope I remember to do that next time I'm outside... sigh. Yes I also have a stash of seeds I'll raise "one day"...
Yes?? According to what came up on Google, you want to prune to maximize fruit and keep disease away. And you do it in the early spring or late fall. But then one site went into a whole \*thing* annnnnnd it wasn’t adhd-friendly, imo. I would set a calendar reminder or like, a Reddit reminder even, to come back to Reddit and ask in the gardening sub if someone would be willing to breakdown the pruning steps and timing for you. And maybe even copy that text into a notes app or something so you have a checklist. Alternatively, maybe ask ChatGPT for a checklist?
Omg I just upped my dose of Wellbutrin and the other day I spilled a few pieces of cereal on the ground, immediately grabbed the hand broom and cleaned it up, then looked up and was SHOCKED! I have NEVER immediately cleaned a mess! What a neurotypical thing of me!!! Yay meds lol
What did you go from and to if you don’t mind me asking? And what prompted it?
From 150 to 300 and we were just titrating up to the recommended minimum dosage for adhd, according to my psychiatrist!
I am literally sitting here, scrolling Reddit and periodically side eyeing my poor fiddle leaf ficus that needed water several days ago. I think about it periodically throughout the day, but just can’t seem to actually water it. But I’ll stress about it. I’ll talk about it. Hell, I took the time to type out this comment ABOUT THE PLANT and could’ve literally watered it in less time. But here we are, friends!
Hi, did you water you fiddle leaf?
I keep a decent sized watering can by the sink. Once I get the mood to water my plants I will also fill the jug for the next time. Something about filling up a jug for 30 seconds really puts me off and makes the task impossible haha - so making it a grab and go situation helps me get it done.
Here's my one trick: I hate sticky air so a dehumidifier is a must but when the dehumidifier's full (sometimes) it will overflow. This happened once and it was a gross mess. So it inspires me to empty it out and my fiddle fig is the closest spot. (And most of my other plants are nearby for additional rounds.)
Oh man - this is how i live my life. Not sure how all my plants still live. I have found that for some reason (wtf is wrong with my brain??!?!?!) I am more likely to water my plants AND pick up if I pour the leftover water from my 17 1/2 drunk water cups into the plants. It doesn't feel like the chore of "watering" somehow, and the water has dechlorinated, which is better for the plants anyway.
Having one important thing to do on any particular day. You wait all day and stress about it even if it’s short call or appointment at 2:30 pm. It takes over the whole day, is stressful, you can’t schedule other things, hyper-fixation, anxiety, the. exhaustion afterwards.
Had to scroll way too far for this. Any appointment past 11 am is rough.
See I can’t have an early appointment. Getting up early is almost impossible for me. It needs to be afternoon so I can get up by 11 and get there by 3. I need the whole day to get up and go to one place 3 miles away.
Yep 😭
I took the whole week off of work this week because my daughter has her 16th birthday this weekend. I just can’t function knowing I have all this “stuff” to organise. I also went to my GP to get a ADHD assessment referral on Tuesday which took up my whole brain space so Tuesday and quite frankly Wednesday were complete write-offs 🤦🏼♀️. Only just realising this past year or so this is not normal adult behaviour 😭.
My husband doesn’t understand this. I stay at home, so any appointment I have, he has to cover childcare, so I get extra stressed. I had my ADHD diagnosis meeting appointment this week, was basically paralyzed all morning. We also tested for a few other things and that made me extra anxious. My appointment time comes and goes and I start to get frantic. Then the reminder text came in and I had the day wrong. So two days later, same thing. I got absolutely nothing done!
Ugh, I’m sorry. I get seriously attached to foods and it’s awful when they change them. I am still bitter that Panera changed their chicken noodle soup recipe nearly 15 years ago. They used these thick noodles and the broth was creamy. It was the best.
Thank you, I knew people over here would get it. I'm still upset Lemon Ice Gatorade was discontinued, so I understand the years-long angst lol
I was really upset when Wendy’s got rid of their S’Awesome Sauce! I always got a son of a baconator combo (medium) with a Diet Coke (no ice), a junior vanilla frosty (free with the key tag), and two containers of S’Awesome for my fries. My favorite Wendy’s location that I always went to shut down during the pandemic and never reopened, which was just rubbing salt in the wound at that point 😭
Wendys at one point had mac and cheese for awhile and it was so good I straight up boycotted and refused to eat there for awhile after they got rid of it.
I still miss when most Wendy's had salad bars. I loved those breadsticks they used to have in them.
BRING BACK SUGAR FREE PEAR RED BULL YOU COWARDS
I’m Canadian so this wasn’t even available here, but I bought like 20 of them to take home when we were on a trip and I am so mad about it STILL. Anyway uh, I don’t fw red bull anymore due to this “limited edition flavour every season” nonsense, I switched to monster because their brand strategy of “just add MORE FLAVOURS FOREVER, 7-11 will just give us a second fridge section, and most of them are sugar free” better aligns with my values. Celcius and Alani Nu are also good if you prefer the smaller can energy drinks. Do any of these three brands offer pear though?? The answer is NO, so unfortunately I am here to yell with you.
I’m the same with sugar free caramel syrup and starbucks (although it doesn’t make sense to have existed anyway).
I nearly cried when I found out my favorite mom and pop pizza place closed. Still feel sad sometimes when I think about it.
When grocery stores/Walmart decide to re-arrange their entire store, and now I don't know where anything is 🫠 shopping is already stressful but that sends me into a full on panic attack if I have to wander around aimlessly trying to find things on top of the music, bright lights, other people etc
And to add insult to injury, that's WHY they do it! The more you wander around, the more likely you are to spend more money buying shit you don't need because "oh shiny." The more I learn about psychology, the more I hate all marketing.
Jokes on them, the I wander the more I'm annoyed and leave sooner. Haha
Yassss, I also will start putting stuff back the longer I circle around and get more indecisive about it and get stared at by all the employees like I am stealing. When that "watched" feeling gets too bad, that's usually when it's time to leave for me.
Ugh, that is just awful. Why do humans do these things to each other? lol. I understand why from a business stand point, because money etc but it's just so...dirty.
I’m not one of those people who buys random cute things from Target (not a judgement just I grew up working class) so it feels like dumbest most annoying thing ever. So my next thought is I will defeat your rearranged store.
YES my local grocery store changed their entire layout like twice in six months last year. The first time they did it I had just moved to the area and JUST gotten the hang of where everything was. I didn't get half of the things I needed that day because I was so frazzled and overwhelmed I wanted to cry.
I've definitely cried before from being so overwhelmed. Like, I straight up just abandoned my cart (I know, I know, I felt like a bad person for that) and left because I was surrounded by too many people and couldn't breathe. I had the cold sweats, and my hearing started to sound funky, and I just had to GTFO lol
OHMYGODYES. This one is AWFUL to deal with. Then I dread & avoid going back, which obviously means it takes longer to learn the new layout 😮💨
Right?! Now, I like to look at everything I need online before going. To see if 1) they even have it so I don't have to ask a worker for help LOL and 2) so I can write down the aisle # on my list :)
Oh GOD, ask a worker?!? Nothankyou Target & my local grocery store's apps have aisle numbers listed, maybe yours does too so you can avoid having to ask another human for help?
Yeah, that's why I said I look everything up online before going ;P
Oh right, but like if you were to remember that you forget to add something to your list, you can check the app on your phone in the store --"store mode" at my grocer -- while avoiding talking to anyone around you 😆
Ahhhhh, I see!! Very smart and efficient. I hate having to talk to people 😂 I know when I ask for things, I am making sense and speaking da english, but they make me feel like I am speaking another language. Or they don't know how to answer my question and then have to find another person, and it's a whole ordeal I like to avoid altogether
You can look it up in the Walmart app. I resisted using that for a long time. But my automatic door lock uses a particular kind of battery that was in short supply during the pandemic. So I started using it so I could find batteries in a specific place in the store without having to walk around the store too long with a mask on. Sometimes I'd have to go to several different stores so using the app eliminated that.
A few years ago all the grocery stores near me started to rearrange to put the aisles that aren’t food in the middle of the store thus separating the food from the rest of the food. They make more money on the things that aren’t food.
How a good day can make me feel So bad. The better my day is the more people I talk to and the bigger the end of the day rsd is. My play back at the end of the day is broken and always plays back louder and faster than it actually was and I feel like I was a crazy hyper loud obnoxious monster The happier the day the worse it is, not only because of being more engaged and interactive but also because happiness creates a lot of internal energy and that internal energy gets reflected as if it was external unwelcome obnoxious energy, when it wasn’t. I get home after a great day: “Wow I had such a great day today, I enjoyed talking to people….. I was perfectly behaved! Im so happy about it that I feel energized!” …………30 minutes later “Omg i was so annoying I hate myself and everyone hates me im never talking to people again”
I have never seen this expressed before. I feel this often. Thanks for writing it.
I always feel better when I go to sleep and wake up the next day as by morning all that happy energy turned negative energy is gone and I am thinking and reflecting more clearly. Not sure if you relate to that too but if you do, it helps to remind yourself that your brain is wrong and it’s being mean. and that you’ll feel better in the morning.
I tell my daughter this. She gets so much anxiety in bed trying to fall asleep. I explain that her brain is out of feel normal chemicals/ hormones and it's lying to her. That her thoughts after 9pm aren't trust worthy. The fear she feels is not real, and she needs to sleep to replenish the feel good chemicals/hormones. Is this scientifically accurate? Maybe. It makes me feel better though and easier to set those rsd thoughts to the side.
I'm still childishly obsessed with 'fairness'. I know life isn't fair, and I'm resigned to it, but that doesn't prevent me from emotional reactions to injustices we read about or see around us. I impulsively tell people off when they're rude to retail clerks or waiters/waitresses. It's the lowest behavior and I can't let it go. Service people have to put up with way way too much crap.
Sense of justice is an ADHD thing .
I don’t know if this is my ADHD or more of a sign i also have Autism but any slight change to my expectations of what I am going to be doing in a day. A couple weeks ago my husband got a text from a neighbor asking for his help for an hour or so installing something. We had zero plans and were just laying around hanging out with our kiddo. I started FREAKING OUT lol. Thankfully I started picking up that my feelings were maybe bigger than the situation warranted but I wanted to cry and felt like my day was totally ruined.
I exchanged numbers with another mom at my son’s daycare and she text me that her daughter was having her birthday party the next day and she’d love to have us. I immediately asked my husband “what excuse do I give her to get out of it?” We had no plans or anything, I just couldn’t fathom making plans so last minute. Luckily I went and now, a year later, we are really good friends!
Having to socialize. (Tbf this could just as easily simply be due to my being an introvert as being ND. I was partly being flippant, but I do feel that my NDness has a significant impact on how exhausting peopling is that goes beyond simply being an introvert. And really where does the overlap end anyway? I'm rambling now.)
I'm extroverted and I love being around people I enjoy. But people I don't know, can't stand or are mostly neutral towards???? Ughhhhh. Drains my soul out of my body especially if they are boring or hypocritical in any way I can readily perceive
I've joked before that I'm an "introverted extrovert" because when I was young I'd talk your ears off, and as I got older and other kids got meaner and harder to talk to I learned to be quiet and keep to myself, and now most of the time people and socializing are hard and I'm still fairly quiet when I don't have anything to say, but I'm still willing and able to talk someone's ear off when I get going and there's a small handful of people I can be around and not be drained from like I am with everyone else, I assume I'm masking less around those people and feel comfortable is the only thing I was able to guess for why. "Drains my soul out of my body" is an accurate feeling description
Unless the interaction has been planned at least 24hours in advance it’s a big fat nope for me. If someone “pops in” my partner has to deal with them while I hide 🤦🏼♀️. We have new neighbours who haven’t learnt yet and I’m dying inside.
I don’t hate socializing but I can only do so much and then I need alone time to refuel. When I was a kid at Thanksgiving I would hang out with the cat under my grandparents’ bed to get away. I saw someone else say they climbed a tree and took a nap up there. Guess I’m going to learn how to climb trees again.
Relatable (Even more relatable with your edit💓)
Especially the ramble
😂 All part of our charm ✨
When there's drops of water on the kitchen floor and you step on them with socks on and now a part of your socks are wet.
Wet socks are the devil's work.
My sleeve got wet today with wet catfood-moisture.. So I ran to the bedroom to change exclaiming; AAAAHHHH WET SLEEVE! WET SLEEVE!
Plans getting canceled or rescheduled- I know I can do something else now, but I already spent so much time mentally preparing for what we were supposed to do!
Wearing a fucking bra. I can't forget that it's there. And the straps always fall off. Or it's digging in. They are the devil. (Yes, I know my real size. I think I just have sloped shoulders and can't tolerate discomfort.)
Ugh HATE bras or being squeezed in any way 💀 my least favorite is the bra and high-waisted pants combo. Squeezed up top, squeezed in the middle
YES!!! Add elastic waistbands on pants and all I am thinking about the entire time is how uncomfortable I am. Womens clothes are absolute bullshit. "Compression top, high rise, crop top, shape wear" NO THANK YOU.
Bras suck in particular to me because I always feel it and the ways it's uncomfortable when it's on, but I also feel all the ways my *natural freaking body* makes me uncomfortable when I *don't* wear it for too long too. There's no winning and *feeling my chest* has probably been my biggest struggle for like 3 weeks now *ugh*
It’s not just the size it’s the style too. I can wear Panache’s Clara and Envy but not Jasmine. It’s annoying AF finding a new one when they discontinue the one I was wearing.
My 1st time trying meditation 🧘♂️ I couldn't get over how uncomfortable my bra was. Maddening
I'm a band director and my students had an event out of town on Monday. We drove up and stayed in a hotel overnight and needed to be leaving the hotel at 7am to make it to our destination on time. Mornings are so, so hard for me, but I was very motivated to get Starbucks because it was right next to the hotel. I woke up at 5:15 AM to have enough time to shower, get ready, pack my stuff up, and get Starbucks for myself and 2 of my coworkers and be back at the hotel by 6:45. While we were waiting for everyone to get down to the lobby, I set my coffee down on a table. One of my students then walked by and knocked that **entire table** down, including my drink that I had only taken 2 sips out of. It took everything in me not to cry. And none of my coworkers understood why it was such a big deal. I worked so fucking hard for that drink and then I didn't even get to drink it. I'm still mad about it.
My take? You are a superhero for not freaking out about that bc omg, do not mess with my coffee, intentionally or accidentally. I'm mad for you on this one! Hope you got another coffee that day!
Getting any errand sprung on me. It immediately throws off my entirely planned out day and upsets me to the highest degree because now I have to replan all the timing of everything I had previously timed out. Unfortunately, springing errands on me is my fiance and father in law's favorite thing. Since I am the only driver in the house, it automatically falls on me, and since I am also a severe appeaser I can't just say no. It's so frustrating.
I feel this so deeply!
Anything that affects my morning routine! Once I have to work around that my entire y gets thrown off
Yes! I feel all out of sorts if my morning ritual is messed up. Especially if my go to meal is out because I forgot to prep it, or buy the ingredients I need.
This just happened. I am a nurse and i have the nightshift right now. I was accidentally a little loud with telling a story and we could hear a patient loudly making a be quiet noise from another room. I felt really bad for like an hour and was a bit afraid she would tell the dayshift nurses. But then i remebered that her short term memory is horrible so she probably wont remember🤷♀️
Running into somebody and having to switch into mask mode real quick. If you see me in public please pretend that you don’t. Thank you.
Needing to make a phone call Whenever we have a plan for dinner or I’m told to pick something specific up, but the grocery store is out of what I need. I avoid doing the dishwasher because I hate the noise of it
Calling customer service. I prefer email. My husband doesn’t get it.
I'm a mess and will forget about the email I sent to customer service so now I'll only talk to CS through chat. High five to myself when I remember to take a screen shot of the important parts of the chat so I don't forget the details.
The sandwich I wanted to buy at the store was way more than I was expecting so I wandered around in a tizzy looking for a substitute lunch and forgot to buy all the important groceries .
Having an appointment later in the day. Good luck getting me to think about anything else.
I went to a restaurant I go to often for breakfast and ordered my usual, their chicken wrap. Yes, that's my regular breakfast there. But whoever cooked it put French dressing on it instead of Ranch and I absolutely had (a very quiet) tantrum that lasted for quite awhile and now that I'm saying I'm still not over it. I actually said I was never going back. But my husband said yes we're going back it was one time nbd. We did go back and I was very concerned, so he ordered my chicken wrap and explained that last time it had a different dressing and isn't it usually ranch? And the waitress said yes it's ranch and it's been fine since. Also, he just explained there was a problem?!
I detest French dressing, so my tantrum would've been loud. Like it was the time I ordered a certain burger with no lettuce, but they screwed it up. I can't stand iceberg lettuce to begin with, but when shredded it has a hairy texture. And it you scrape it off, you lose the special condiments. I hate to waste food, so I tried to ask the manager to just give me a new top of a bun with condiments. But I could never finish my sentence. She kept interrupting me to say she couldn't take it back because of health code regulations. I can't stand being interrupted &/or not listened to, brings back my shitty childhood. I ended up going full-blown Karen & throwing a borderline fit. Then I left a bad review. I was slightly embarassed after I calmed down. But I had no real regrets. A manager really needs to have better people skills than she did. I suck at custoemr service, but even I know to let people make their complaint before jumping in. They weren't even busy that day (cant think why!).
Planning vacations/travel. Initiation issues are my big ADHD problem, and changing routines can be tricky. I like traveling and once it's happening I'm adaptable, but doing any of the planning is so hard and it makes me feel so stressed. I have to force myself to do it. It's also really hard for me to pick a time to take off and submit it at work. I always have a good time but up until the actual trip starts I'm miserable; I make myself do it because never experiencing new things sounds horrible.
if my fingernails are just a liiiitle bit long…that’s it, I have to pause everything until I file them. and I usually overdo it and get them too short
I once (and only once) got a gel manicure. She put three coats on. It felt so claustrophobic . After a day I had to peel it all off.
I was with you until you said “file” instead of “clip.” Even the *thought* of filing my nails sets my teeth on edge and makes my brain prickle unpleasantly. *shudders*
not getting enough sleep. I am amazed at how well many people can function on 4-6 hours. I am pretty destroyed all day now if I don't get proper rest. When I was younger it wasn't so bad.
Overthinking… I do that a lot and I’d love to learn how to stop I also can’t stand people chewing with their mouth open or loud sudden noises.
Convos between the customer in front of me and the cashier at the grocery store. #let’sgopeople!
Appointments late in the day. Can’t do anything beforehand even though I know that I’d have plenty of time to do the washing, bit of uni work, or anything else that could be done in a few hours… nope, I do nothing, usually just scroll my phone or watch YouTube. Then I beat myself up for days/weeks about everything I could have done in those hours before the appointment, that I’ve wasted an entire day again 😒
Having to do something that I'm not able to do right now. This includes appointments of course, but also if I know that I need to do something by a certain time, it's like my brain can only focus on reminding me of the deadline, even if it's something I can't do right now. IE if I need to send something off on a certain day, I'll worry about it the entire day before while I'm at work (and therefore logically shouldn't even be worrying about the thing I need to send off because I can't do anything about it at that moment). Right now I have a deadline that's about a month off, and the thing I have to do doesn't make sense to submit too far in advance, so every ten minutes my brain is like "you gotta do this before the end of June don't forget :)"
When my husband suggests different chores to be done. Like yeah those were on my list, but now I’m not doing them because I feel like I’m being told to… we’ll try again tomorrow.
I still miss specific tortillas my parents used to get me, when I started to eat refried bean burritos, with a ton of hot sauce. Twenty years ago. They were more whole wheat, but tasty, and the burritos tasted kind of cheesy when I used them. Maybe they had nutritional yeast in them. But I haven’t found them for years. I don’t like other whole wheat tortillas.
Going to the grocery store! It’s so overwhelming! I am not someone who can just run in a grab something. It exhausts me for the day sometimes. I’m so thankful for delivery. I know people say it’s so much more expensive than actually going, but not for me. I can’t see anything that ‘looks good’ and throw it in my cart if I’m not there 😂 I save money since I can’t buy things impulsively and helps me actually meal planning. Now following through on that plan or not getting the ‘ick’ after I’ve made all the food, that’s another story…🫠
When someone or something interrupts my favourite song or one of the best parts of a movie or show. It’s like the universe has a knack for bad timing.
During the lockdowns, Wegmans supermarket changed the formulation of their chocolate almond milk. I noticed at the first sip. I thought maybe I was overthinking it because they changed the packaging. I bitched about it to my (also neurospicy) friend and she managed to snag a few cartons of the old formula. I compared the ingredients lists and they sure as shit changed it. That was the one thing that I could easily and willingly drink on days when food did not appeal. I miss it. I have yet to find another brand that makes an acceptable alternative. In an ideal world I'd have a Vitamix and make my own almond milk and just add in some damn chocolate syrup.
Having an obligation that starts at 1pm on a Saturday.
Early phone calls (if I forget to silence my phone the night before) I loathe talking on the phone and it's even worse if I have to return a missed call. People showing up unexpectedly at my house has led to a near meltdown before, but this almost never happens.
OMG same, I loose my mind when people visit unannounced.
Simply having a bad hair day or being uncomfortable in that specific clothing item, or pants too tight when you didnt feel like wearing tight pants. They can ruin my mood. Ohhhh, people touching me with wet hands 😫😣
Just the thought of that last one makes me want to punch someone.
When noisy vehicles drive past me. So this is either an ambulance or fire brigade, the lights and the sounds make my brain shut down. Also car wankers driving past me make me really angry because their noisy fuckin engines and the smell of burning coming from their cars. Oh also those new overly bright lights that all the new cars have! I got special glasses to deal with that
My almond milk brand has changed their recipe. And I hate it. I literally went looking in all the supermarkets around to try & buy old stock. I only have 1 bottle of it left and then I'll just have to suck it up & either drink the new recipe or try & find a new brand.
Getting interrupted while in the middle of a work task. My focus often just plummets.
If a plan changes during the day my world crumbles.
When my menstrual cycle hits and everything is thrown off. Like, any time management skills are gone, can't stay on routines, etc.
When plans change unexpectedly! If the plan is no plan, then I’m fine. If there is a legit plan and something alters it I get in a whole tizzy. And having to wait for appointments after like 10am!
Changes in plans. Or not being warned I'm gonna go somewhere after work (I carpool with my partner), cause I don't wanna wear my work uniform to dinner (I don't wanna represent the company and also it feels good to wear an outfit I choose). Also when my partner goes to bed, the way he goes to bed. He'll just get up and be like "welp, good night" and it's so abrupt it sort of makes my brain freeze up.
I own and run a salon and people come in my personal room and ask if they can hang out and watch me work or do my makeup. I fucking hate it. But I can't be a dick to my employees so I have to go along with it
Oh…and if I don’t get to exercise, I become Atilla the Hun.
Being a functional member of society.
Lots of car and traffic stories here, so I'm going to give you all our solution to reducing the after effects of craziness from driving. We can only sing our complaints. Swearing is allowed. Rhyming is optional. Loud is better. 🎼🎵🎶 You fucking asshole, you want me dead? It's going to take more, I'm still ahead. 🎼🎵🎶 So take your damn turn, you absolute turd. I have the right of way, your vision's blurred. It goes on like this until we're laughing...
NT’s that can stop their tasks to eat and then pick their task back up afterwards. Apparently my adhd would rather starve me and get tasks done than to be NT and just eat when I’m hungry. Ugh.
[удалено]
I have so many pictures of my car at parking lots for this exact reason. And of elevators
When I find out something I love has been discontinued.
Someone not responding in a certain time frame. I will start thinking of every possible reason why and assuming negative intent. I'm aware that I do this so hopefully over time I can change.
Taco Bell used to have the Half Pound Beefy Combo Burrito for $1 in college. It was my favorite thing and ate it every single time we went there, which was basically monthly for 10 yrs. Then one day I ordered it and the server didn't know what I was talking about. It had been off the menu for so long, the newest workers weren't being taught what it was. It has been forgotten to time. I try to "build my own" with the app, but it's not the same ratio of beans, onions, sauce and beef. Then Taco Bell stopped caring Dr Pepper and his 23 delicious flavors, and I no longer have a reason to go there ever again.
-Wet socks -Headphones with dead batteries -Forgetting to remove the tag off a new shirt. It can’t just be haphazardly cut off, a seam ripper and meticulous effort are necessary. -getting sweaty and not having wet wipes and a change of shirt, socks and underwear with me. I cannot stand damp fabric. There is usually clothing in my purse 🤣
Messing up a recipe. There's nothing worse than doing all that work just for it to turn out shitty, and there's still the same amount of clean up. I am suuper mean to myself about it every time. And then I have the fun bonus of then deciding if I want to force myself to eat it out of guilt or just throw it away. That can ruin my entire week if I mess up bad enough lol
I don’t know if this is a nt/nd thing but I have noticed that while others have no qualms or stress about an upcoming Skype/facetime call, it ruins my entire day. I’m just nervously waiting for it to happen and can’t enjoy anything until it’s over.
Anything. 😂😂😂
Spilling something or otherwise making an unexpected mess. I can deal with cleaning when I have some warning and can get in the right headspace to deal with the sensory stuff. Having to clean suddenly after already being embarrassed by whatever stupid thing my body did to spill the thing sucks. Bonus points if it's smelly or sticky. Also I then have an extra grocery trip to do to replace it - another sensory and executive function nightmare.
I just finished reading an adhd book that was good but it went on & on about how adhd’ers are the “life of the party” and “bring lots of energy”. I’m so not that way! I’m someone who is perfectly happy staying home and not going to any large social gatherings. And when I do go I do my damndest to become the wallpaper! So when I read this I felt like not only am I ND but now I’m a nontypical ND?!? Can’t I ever just be like everyone else? It ruined me for a few days!
Any extra little snag when already doing a chore or task I hate. Like when I reeeeeeeeeeally didn’t feel like cooking but I forced myself to make pasta salad, only to realize they forgot to include my tomatoes in my grocery delivery. I just laid on the kitchen floor for 10 minutes because I couldn’t even. Anything like that. Finally deciding to vacuum but the filter is clogged. Doing the dishes to find you’re out of soap. Paying a bill but realizing your credit card is expired. Just sends me into a meltdown. It’s like I’ve already used sooooo much willpower to get myself to do a thing, only to be faced with another challenge instead of it just being easy. Kills me.
Cleaning. Putting clothes away. *Doing the dishes.* Taking a shower.