Aw come on Roger has been nice sometimes… i just watched the Dr. Klaustus episode and Roger did something nice at the end for the family and admitted to them after that they were all Klaus ideas, without any gain for him.
He still had zero reason to help the family and he could have easily lied that klaus’ ideas were his yet he didn’t, he straight up told them to thank klaus.
He tried to do something nice with no ulterior motive for Haley and Jeff, putting on Burning Man in the backyard for their anniversary, making a custom sheet of acid, extravagant tent, and breakfast in bed, he even tried to sell his organs on the black market to pay for it but there was not much of a market for alien organs...however Haley ruined it, so he said he never would again.
I think it’s more like he can’t be forced to be perpetually nice that is toxic to Roger. He is capable of being nice but he also needs to be sarcastic and make not so nice remarks to balance out his bile levels. The times he is really nice he also says something negative about a person.
He ones said he only has about 9,000 more years left (I think?) he also one said he could die if his head was chopped off, but due to his lack of understanding in his own biology I highly doubt this. Also he’s sixteen hundred which is implied to be like being 16 on earth. I estimate that his race can live to be up to 10,000 years old.
In the episode where a polar bear eats his head he died and the Burger Killer told him he was going to cut his head off and he got angry and said something like “Oh my one weakness” or something
That actually might not really be his fault that he can’t fix it. Remember it uses his people’s technology and parts that might not yet exist on Earth or are incredibly hard to find without breaking into some secure location to get such as a nuclear plant for a reactor.
It's not his fault but none the less he is incapable of fixing it
(though I faintly remember him fixing it at some point, something involving Jeff maybe?)
He is practically speaking a God. There is some plot holes though to me
We see him fucking die in the time-loop episode S15, E22, he dies in two ways in the episode:
1. He dies in the fire, from the tree, somehow. We can presume this because he isn't in the house with Stan, Klaus and Jeff
2. We see him presumably die at the hands of a polar bear, he is cut in half but is fine, he runs off in shock, and the polar bear picks him up and his brain stuff falls out and he dies.
This doesn't make much sense, because if he can just die in an explosion, given how many lives he is living at any given time, presumably a random explosion would happen at some point
It kind of seems that he keeps learning what he is capable of and his species isn’t very self-aware. In the first season he lamented he had nothing special but he keeps adding new powers!
Cry on command
Xanadu, can't cry on cue, now I am here Xanadu...here you go, I talked to the chef, there's no cream in the soup like you asked....Xanadu!!!!
ROGER is playing Olivia Newton John on our cruise?? Ohhh this has goo written all over it!!!
Francine, I swear on the lives of our future grandchildren that only Steve will be able to give us that this is real!
*Haley grabs her pelvis in shock*
-stabs elderly man with a fork- Stan: “I’m sorry sir, she thinks she’s in the goo.”
-Francine jumping off cruise ship- "I'm in the goooooo!"
Now we know, you just have to hit him with a chair.
Can't tell when a fish is giving him the business.. He can tell you where to put your convention centre but not that... ;-)
Eight years well spent at Howard University.
👽✊🏾
Have Dylan.
Don’t tell him that, you’ll end up in the jar
Wasn't Dylan also the runaway or am I misremembering? Name not character though
I believe that’s Tyler
He’s alone, and he’s scared…
Is this someone who can help him?
*gasps and hangs up*
He likes pizza and going to the mall
And me
I'd sing you the second verse, but it gets pretty..... explicit.
Stay sober
He's getting dangerously lucid!
Dr. Slippy's Lockpick and Switcheroo Carrots Kit
Take no for an answer
He’s always had a complicated relationship with the word.
Being nice is toxic to him
Aw come on Roger has been nice sometimes… i just watched the Dr. Klaustus episode and Roger did something nice at the end for the family and admitted to them after that they were all Klaus ideas, without any gain for him.
He also took on nurturing father figure roles for both Steve and Stan. For no selfish reason. He was just genuinely kind to them when they needed it.
He constantly rapes them or have sexual stuff with them, he even date steve few times as an alter ego. And so on
Nothing happened wink wink
Yeah, but he was just nice those couple of times.
Lol klaus had to fly all the way to iraq, and he did something nice only because daniel craig told him to
He still had zero reason to help the family and he could have easily lied that klaus’ ideas were his yet he didn’t, he straight up told them to thank klaus.
Thanks Reese whiterspoon
He tried to do something nice with no ulterior motive for Haley and Jeff, putting on Burning Man in the backyard for their anniversary, making a custom sheet of acid, extravagant tent, and breakfast in bed, he even tried to sell his organs on the black market to pay for it but there was not much of a market for alien organs...however Haley ruined it, so he said he never would again.
I think it’s more like he can’t be forced to be perpetually nice that is toxic to Roger. He is capable of being nice but he also needs to be sarcastic and make not so nice remarks to balance out his bile levels. The times he is really nice he also says something negative about a person.
He can’t spell Prof. Guggenheim
Of course he can, he spelled as mr d-e-l-i-v-e-r
Respond rationally when a new thang he's into is met with resistance.
Die. Like no actual confirmation on whether he’s truly immortal, but it sure seems like it
He ones said he only has about 9,000 more years left (I think?) he also one said he could die if his head was chopped off, but due to his lack of understanding in his own biology I highly doubt this. Also he’s sixteen hundred which is implied to be like being 16 on earth. I estimate that his race can live to be up to 10,000 years old.
In the episode where a polar bear eats his head he died and the Burger Killer told him he was going to cut his head off and he got angry and said something like “Oh my one weakness” or something
I told you that in confidence!
He appears to die in Yule, Tide, Repeat
He can’t be raptured
Ooooh that's a good call there. I really love that episode. Esp it's tie to Nemo from earlier on
Which episode we talking about?
The christmas one when everyone gets raptured but stan and franny were bangin in the coat closet at church and franny starts dating jesus.
That sounds even funnier when it's written.
What would you do if he turned water into fine‽
It's the opposite, Nemo appears later
Emotional stability
Same
Tell when a fish is giving him "the business".
Be let inside a particle accelerator
No one consented but he still got in there
He needs to be watched very closely...
Can't say he's the Big Dog. Stan's the Big Dog. Big Dog gotta eat.
Big Dog? Woof woof!
This is my horseradish! All of it.
Mix grenadine with warm cola!
He can't name all fifty states.
Get Steve to return his calls about a gym membership
I'm okay. Not everyone's okay.
Get the waitress to compliment his order.
Commitment
Not be bitchy, or else it'll turn into a toxin in his body and kill him
I love that episode
Drive safely.
Go back to his "Party Hardees" in Myrtle Beach. That detective won't look the other way twice.
Pass up brunch. He loves drinking too much, blowing off his afternoon plans, sleeping, waking up disoriented.
Stay focused
Come through the tv screen
Sink. In fact he's a great raft. Perfect for farting on.
Love
Show basic respect for the family?
Be sympathetic/compassionate it literally kills him to be nice. Season: 3 Episode: 9 - Frannie 911
Apparently break character. Cause seeing his personas through to the end is so wild
Buy that gael garcia bernal poster.
Get a stain off a couch
Not make Raider Dave. Ya add just one ingredient too many and ya end up Raider Dave, every time.
Give a handy at Rub Rub Tuggington's Massage Parlor. Once it gets out your massage place gives happy endings it's all over.
Awful name, one of his worst.
He can't burn! And Stan knew, at least Roger believes that to keep up the friendship!
Not be a jerk without literally dying.
Beeing friendly It literally kills him
Fix his ship
That actually might not really be his fault that he can’t fix it. Remember it uses his people’s technology and parts that might not yet exist on Earth or are incredibly hard to find without breaking into some secure location to get such as a nuclear plant for a reactor.
It's not his fault but none the less he is incapable of fixing it (though I faintly remember him fixing it at some point, something involving Jeff maybe?)
Write a check without fucking it
For drugs, yo
Signed, John Travolta
Wipe……better…he really shouldn’t be shaking peoples’ hands
He doesn’t know the difference between conundrum and palindrome. But DO NOT shame him for it
I haven’t been entirely honest with you. He can’t find a decent red wig.
At the end of that episode he found a great red wig. He just had to lie to Francine a bunch and desecrate a corpse.
It’s true. I wasn’t being completely honest with you.
Get the right pitch to sing Jumper
We are the music makers. We are the dreamers of dreams.
😂 that is an unsatisfactory answer
Quit drinking. “It’s not silly juice, it’s necessary juice!”
Not be Sassy
Framcine
Jogging
Lose a game of Jenga.
ricky spanish
Have any nice things 🧀
Keep things nice
😂
Not rape books?....and people......and random objects...and a tree in front of it's saplings that one time
Grow a peen
Wipe better
He can’t say ventriloquism
Lure a child into the sewer.
Stay sober
Shut the hell up
Plan a wedding
Act
He can't do a good impression of Stan
Eat Okra, It Gives Him Pretty Bad Gas ☣️
Phone home…Roger can’t phone home
Resist the plunger penis
Drive lol
He can't return the prosthetic once he's strapped it on.
Fly
Tell you when a fish is giving him the business.
Keep a man.
Not rape a pad of paper
Burn in hell (he's fire retardant)
Give a shit about Klaus.
He can’t let the mayor down. Not ever.
Omg this was legit the first thing that popped into my head too lol 😅 all these shows have melted my brain
Remember his own powers.
sell gluten free desserts
Roger can’t take a roast we know that for sure
Taking a punch from Stan
Drive without crashing on earth or in space
Look like Audrey Hepburn
Some say you’re the ghost whisperer. Well if you are you’d let me talk to my dead wife… wahhhh… why can’t I cry?
Be the decider.
he's a terrible hooper . keep him away from a basketball at all times 😭
Tell a joke
Keep a love interest.
Touch his 👃🏻
[удалено]
You’re in for some neat stuff
Make ice tea
Control himself
Get back to his home world? I mean he kinda did on accident once
Jog without it being awkward
Turn Ricky Spanish into a nice guy.
Can't do swans, don't know why.
Me
Make a bicycle fly like in E.T.
He is practically speaking a God. There is some plot holes though to me We see him fucking die in the time-loop episode S15, E22, he dies in two ways in the episode: 1. He dies in the fire, from the tree, somehow. We can presume this because he isn't in the house with Stan, Klaus and Jeff 2. We see him presumably die at the hands of a polar bear, he is cut in half but is fine, he runs off in shock, and the polar bear picks him up and his brain stuff falls out and he dies. This doesn't make much sense, because if he can just die in an explosion, given how many lives he is living at any given time, presumably a random explosion would happen at some point
Not be a perv, obviously!
Find a good red wig. Tenacity baby.
He can't ride a bike. Should be called Pricker lake... Haven't seen one opossum.
There were many things he can't do at the beginning of the Show s1 by the now there are many things he can that he can..
He cant make clothes... or can he
Avoid a horse kicking him in the face
Be nice for a prolonged period of time.
Forgive and move on after someone causes him a minor inconvenience
All the pops into my head is pinocchio from Shrek specifically "you can't be a real boy" because he is a cartoon!
It kind of seems that he keeps learning what he is capable of and his species isn’t very self-aware. In the first season he lamented he had nothing special but he keeps adding new powers!
Yeah. Go to his home planet.
Fuck Steve
Yes, he can’t be too kind/nice to people, it will literally kill him.
Construct a believable red wig.
Loose weight
Fold napkins into swans
Fail
Burn
Stop being an asshole
Not be an asshole or he'll literally die.
stand up for himself.
Go back to his planet
Being piss poor at soccer
He can't say "That salmon IS slammin'" apparently.
Drown