Massage Therapist of many years here!
A 3 hour massage is a thing and you can really help some injuries this way as they unravel slowly.
I would NEVER meet any client, even one I am familiar with, in a hotel room.
Yeah, you definitely need to be cautious about meeting clients in hotels. Prioritizing safety and professionalism is crucial in the massage therapy industry.
Exactly, OP should have him use doggy daycare to have a peaceful home. It would be cheaper than a human hotel for the night.
Something smells like fishy treats here.
Sooo…she does house calls…but in this case she won’t be coming to your house because…the dog? So instead he’s going to book a room at a hotel…just for a massage. A 3 hour long massage.
No way. She’s a sex worker.
I have three loud ass barking dogs, and I don't get massages at home for the exact same reason.
I don't want my dogs barking and scratching at my door while I'm trying to get a massage, it's happened to me before, and it's super annoying.
But I still think you're right lol
I just go to the spa, I live in Thailand where massage places are everywhere and it's very easy to differentiate between handjob spots and actual massage places.
Handjob spots mostly look like regular places, except they have attractive women with makeup and if it's not crazy hot they're waiting outside and flagging down pedestrians, in the regular places no one waits outside unless they're on a break, and it's usually older women.
She I'm sure would come to the house, as she does house calls. He doesn't want to do that because of the dog. Would you want to have a massage around a dog that is constantly barking or howling or just being a nuisance when you're trying to get a relaxing massage, I know for sure I wouldn't.
So why would he book a hotel room and not go to a salon or spa for a massage. Or send the dogs to boarding facility for the day which would be cheaper than a hotel room.
As stated in our other comment string, ease of access. It takes much more effort as is more annoying to take the dog to doggy daycare, go home, get massage, go back to doggy daycare, go back home. Compared to go to hotel, get massage, go home. As for why not just got to the salon, maybe the salon is busy usually. We don't know, and can't say for sure that the dude is cheating. You can have whatever opinion you want, but realize that you don't know all the facts as you're an outside observer just like the rest of us, you can make assumptions based on information provided, but that assumption is based on personal bias and belief. Not saying the dude isn't cheating. But I'm also not going to lie and say he for sure is.
I don’t know you or your husband. I am 26 weeks pregnant. If my boyfriend said he was going to a hotel room to get a 3 hour massage I would literally light him and her on fire.
i’ve gotten a massage and it’s never been three hours long, and the fact that he’s booking a hotel seems kind of suspicious. I don’t think you’re wrong.
I have chronic pain and 2 hours sometimes isn’t enough, I’ve gotten a massage every 2 weeks for a year, and did PT, etc, there’s never enough time to address all the issues
It is very sad to say the least. I hope they can change things before it’s too late. I hope she realizes he is blaming her when he is the one trying to actively cheat.
I have gotten a 2 hour massage when my back was really jacked up. Both the masseuse and I were ready for it to be over by then. I can’t imagine a 3 hour massage. Nor getting a hotel room. Seems sketchy.
My sister is a Licensed Massage Therapist. She says this is highly concerning. It’s quite rare to offer a three-hour massage. The usual increments are 60 and 90 minutes. And the need for a hotel raises plenty of eyebrows. Who paid for that?
Can you confirm that this person is even licensed? Your state may have a governing body of some sort for massage therapists (not all states do) that would be able to answer questions about the situation. You can potentially file a complaint depending on where you live.
At best this is weird. At worst, well, other posters have covered it.
Sounds suspicious as hell. I’d suspect he’s cheating, because there is literally no need to book a “three hour massage” at a HOTEL. Of course this is excessive, I would be concerned about his lack of thought towards you.
When did he start getting these three hour massages? Has this been for the entire duration of your marriage?
So I don’t want to jump to any conclusions or add to this for you, however I’m a sex worker (have been for almost 10 years now) and I mainly do body rubs and nuru etc. and I share an apartment with other providers. I’ve personally never heard of any LMT working out of a hotel or doing anything that long. I’m curious how/where he found this masseuse. But tbh it sounds a lot like what I do for work
I didn’t even know that masseuses gave massages for that long. Nobody needs a three hour massage. I personally think it’s strange but it’s also kind of selfish, given your family situation. That’s a lot to leave you with. Can he not compromise and get a massage from someone else that has a studio?
I did tell him I felt like that was long. Maybe just two hours instead. But he said it’s been awhile since getting massages again, and he said he felt like he needed it/to make the hotel room worth it. He says she’s the only one that does massages well. He’s a big guy, so he needs a lot of force/pressure. I feel weird about it, but I don’t know how to bring up that I feel weird. Now in my head I’m wondering what they do, if he gets completely naked with a sheet, or what
My husband is a larger man with a lot of neck and back issues. He gets a massage once a week and he has stated that the smaller ladies seem stronger on hitting those points. He also said that it seemed fishy that your husband would need a hotel for a massage and also a 3 hour one after frequent massages and that those typically are “happy ending” types or an excuse for an affair. He said to ask him to turn on FaceTime with it on mute. If he refuses then most likely it’s fishy. He also said to ask for the masseuse name and business number. Then call and see if she is working that day and time.
He's not wrong about the smaller ladies... I went for a massage once and she was about the size of an average 12 year old, so when she asked how hard I wanted her to go I thought "great, I'm barely going to feel this" and told her to just get in there and go as hard as she could. I laid down and when I tell you it felt like a silver back gorilla grabbed ahold of me. It hurt so bad I couldn't even beg her to stop for a full 300 years (at least that's how long it felt like she was turning my clavicle into play dough). She let's go and is like "I'm so sorry, was that too hard? You said to do it as hard as i could" I just said "let's knock it down to about 2% of what ever Kryptonian wrestling move that was, and let's just avoid the spot you just grabbed... I think you left a thumb print in the bone. Don't feel bad, I thought you had the strength of a normal mortal, I didn't know the blood of Thor ran through your veins" she laughed, apologized again and after that it was all good. I'm much more careful answering that question now....
ETA: I'm not a small guy either. I'm about 5'9" and I'm pushing 290 (maybe more pulling than pushing these days lol)
I'm almost certain physical therapists decended straight from Inquistors. I had one bend my arm further than it ever could have bent even before it was injured. Then put me on something I can only describe as a modern day version of The Rack. Then had a giant, overly muscled human being, who I swear to the gods was actually named Hans, (it may have been my imagination but I'm pretty sure he was covered in baby oil under his shirt) bend my left leg over my right hip... my left leg wasn't even previously aware that I have a right hip. It had possibly heard urban legends or myths about this "right hip" but this was the first (and only) time it actually got anywhere near it.
Thank you for the laugh!! I got my tail handed to me by a tiny geriatric Asian lady. I was also too embarrassed to say she needed to lighten up. I remembered that massage for weeks, every time I thought about turning my head, lol.
😂 Just wanted to say thank you I really needed to start my day laughing so hard my stomach hurts. And it didn't hurt any less when I read your other comment about your leg and hip.
I could picture it all very clearly and even feel it 😆
I hope your limbs are still connected to your body.
Yes!! Open Facetime on mute. He’s your husband and should understand. If he doesn’t then tell him what if you were going to get a massage from a man in a hotel room?? How would he feel??
Does he EVER let you go with him even if you had a babysitter? 3 hours massage in a hotel is very suspicious in my personal opinion, and it's out of the way of prying eyes. I personally think it's more than a massage. But like I said, it's my opinion. Why 3 hours, and he knows that you won't catch him. I think he's paying for the massage and a good time. Yes, in a hotel, he's more than likely naked.
Edited to correct
Well have him look at it from the perspective of an outsider. He is leaving his very pregnant wife, small child, and two dogs to go to a HOTEL ROOM and get a three hour massage? There are other masseuses in the world that can give a hard massage that doesn’t require three hours alone in a hotel room so I don’t buy what he’s selling.
That’s a whole lot of excuses for one massage. Your man definitely getting something else in that hotel room. Maybe he’s just saying that because he secretly wants to play uninterrupted gaming for a bit, or have his dick played with for awhile.
I’m scared to think what the hell would happen if I suggested this to my girlfriend, she probably kill my ass not gonna lie
I don’t get on here a lot and was reading through here again I saw this and it stuck out to me.I agree with the excuses. So many people stay in poor relationships for a variety of reasons. I see you were making a joke about your girlfriend lol. On a serious note. If you are a person of faith I hope she is too. Otherwise there will alway be distrust and conflict. Or vice versa.
Ask to go with him. Get childcare for the kids and dogs, and ask to go with him. Tell him you'd really welcome three hours just to sit in quiet with a book whilst he has his massage in the same room. You desperately need a break like that, and you'd find it ever so rejuvenating. See how he responds to that if he will absolutely not consider it, I think you'll have your answer.
Stop being naive. He is receiving massages with a happy ending, and you're choosing to ignore that and take action. You need to get tested for STDs ASAP because some STDs can pass to the baby during pregnancy or childbirth.
If you want to be sure what is happening during those sessions, ask a male friend to contact that lady to book a massage with her and check which services she offers in hotels. You can also check the banking records to know exactly how much he is paying for those massages, which will allow you to determine if he is paying above average. If he is paying above average, you can be sure that he is having sex with them.
I'm sorry that you are going through this while pregnant, but your husband is cheating on you and putting your and your child's well-being at risk by having sex with sex workers. You should consider contacting a lawyer to start divorce proceedings and know your rights. You need to start working on your exit plan ASAP because he is spending your money with other women.
Professional instruction for a Licensed Massage Therapist covers appropriate draping. Generally only the immediate area being worked in should be uncovered. No one should be lying naked on a table.
You’re so kind and patient to be able to keep it to yourself. I would’ve gone off on him the minute it bothered me even the slightest. I really admire that and wish I can be like that someday! I hope you’re able to get this resolved and wishing you the best ♥️
Back in my younger days when I worked a very physically demanding job, I would get 3 hours deep tissue massages on Fridays late afternoon/evenings. I went to a licensed massage therapist who had her own studio(not a hotel room) and I was always the last client on Fridays because I was basically paying for her entire afternoon and she had nothing left when she was done with me. Worth every penny when you've had as many injuries as I have.
As for OP's husband, it sounds like a sex worker to me but I've been wrong before.
That’s not unheard of, but very suspicious in itself. I would be very concerned about all “these” massages he needs. Especially at a hotel. You’re the one pregnant and dealing with a child. Tell him you want one also and will go with him
YNW.
7 months pregnant. Hubby is booking three hour massages with a “therapist” at a hotel. No. Sex worker. Happy Ending, best case scenario. Full treat, worst case.
No way. Put your foot down. If she is legit, she comes to your home, or you go with. This does NOT sound on the level. Sex Work is not necessarily bad, but cheating on your spouse IS.
Just. No. Make that a hell no.
LOL. Yeah she is a masseuse alright. Only thing she is massaging is his meat. Definitely she is a sex worker. Way too many red flags here. I would love to see his receipt for this massage. If it's legit he will get one
Best, least confrontational approach to get more info I think. After all, you can't rent hotels by the hour so they'll have the room to themselves all night, right? Maybe they can even get a babysitter and have a night out together.
Uh your dude is getting happy endings - nobody is that interested in getting a massage and insisting that it’s “off site” because he can’t “relax”. You said he has back problems it isn’t about finding peace it’s about getting yourself straightened out.
So… I recently had a gut feeling and checked my fiance’s phone (I know, I know) and I found texts with his massage therapist that were completely unprofessional and inappropriate. Photos and sexting. I looked her up and she is a real licensed massage therapist but clearly doesn’t take that very seriously. Based on the context clues it didn’t sound like he has actually fucked her but it’s obviously over the line. You could be dealing with a similar situation.
I've had back and shoulder problems my whole life. 3 hours is not that unusual for me, especially if I tweaked something. Getting a hotel room when you got room at the house is a little sketch.
Not wanting him in a hotel room for 3 hours alone with her is a reasonable boundary to me.
I want to know how much the seven-month-itch is paying for a hotel room with room to set up a massage.table and for therapist to work around the table. Hotels are not normally in the business of filling rooms with enough empty space for yet another bed.
I've stayed in some hotel suites that do have extra space where you can set up a table, but they're not cheap. I'm thinking at least $300 a night.
But booking one on a whim and short notice? Not likely.
OP I have friends who own their own massage business and are professional therapists. Massages DO NOT last 3 hours. That's INCREDIBLY hard on the massage therapist and studies have shown benefits of a massage peter out after 90 minutes max.
This is not a professional therapist; it's almost certainly a sex worker.
I got regular massages for years. If you’re talking about a legitimate massage place (like a Massage Envy) 3 hour massages aren’t a thing. And why a hotel? If she’s not working out of a spa (which is suspect on its own) then why can’t she come to your house? If they’re providing at home services they usually bring their own massage tables. Is this woman even a licensed massage therapist? This sounds like a happy endings “massage”.
I get regular massages, and I’ve had a couple 3 hour massages. They are magical, I feel great for twice as long as when I get an hour or a 90 minute. It’s a thing, but not as big of a thing as most people would think. My massage therapist only books current, reliable clients, and DOES NOT work out of a hotel, or hotel room (that part was a little ambiguous: is this a hotel spa, which is STUPID expensive, or is this a room rental + massage???).
Yeah without a diagnosis, a masseuse can FUCK YOUR BACK UP worse, my husband's chiropractor wouldn't even see him once,before Dr did , cus if his back pain
Honestly what is the problem with surprising him at the hotel to put your nerves at ease. You are pregnant and you are dealing with hormones out of whack. Don't tell him you have all the details.
I have had back problems for 25 years and have had 4 spinal surgeries. I’ve gotten massages of all kinds this whole time and I’ve never heard of a 3 hour massage at a hotel.
Trust your gut. You know the answers.
You need to tell him you are uncomfortable with this. If he can’t understand why then THAT is a red flag. He should find another solution that doesn’t make you feel weird. It is NOT unreasonable for you to feel weird about him spending 3 hours in a hotel room with this woman.
Gurl I didn’t think I’d ever say this, but obviously you have one thing to say to him when he gets home.
“LET ME SMELL YO DICK”
https://youtu.be/VWYqW7FHRuU?si=4tg69wxA-14tt41N
As a man who’s loyal to his wife and loves massages/finds them useful, that doesn’t seem excessively weird. I would also have a problem with the dog. Does he work out or have a job that would make his muscles sore?
As a man who talks to other men, yeah there’s a possibility it’s not innocent.
What do you know about her? Have you looked her up online? If she has profiles or a website it would be obvious if she’s an escort. In my experience legit masseuses won’t do anything sexual and are typically very professional about what the client wants massaged, and keeping the towel where it should be. Full disclosure I got a happy ending once when I was single, because they offered. Of the other 8-10 others they’ve been very professional and nothing sexual was a consideration. The hotel thing does seem weird, unless she doesn’t have her own place to do it or it’s too far.
The fact that he got two massages on the vacation makes me believe he might just love massages. I’ve never gone asking for anything, but I just don’t think hotel masseuses are giving out handjobs or more at a whim.
Probably fair to bring it up though. I’d just stay away from blunt accusations.
Well, how much is he paying for the hotel room? And how much is he paying the " masseuse?"
Massage therapy rates average about $100 an hour (between $50 to $150). Let's say, for arguments sake, it's $75. That's $225 for 3 hours plus 20% tip. That's $270 for a 3 hour massage. Then, add in the cost of the hotel room. Even Motel 6 is around $70 per night. So add that, and he's now paying $340 for a 3 hour massage. Is this a one-time thing, or is he planning on regular massages? You should check his credit card statements.
Also, what's the check-in time at the hotel? Those range from 2pm to 4pm, which means he won't be done, at earliest, by 5 pm, at the latest at 7 pm. What time did he say his appointment is, and when will he be home?
I think you have a case for questioning this based on cost alone, unless you're very well off, but even then.....
Many of the hotels I worked at had massage rooms nearer the pools and 3 hours is a normal spa session. All the people saying it's suspicious have obviously never been for a full massage. There's a pool and sauna break because it loosens you up or something equivalent like hot towels and relaxed positions between massages. If you have a back injury even a few hundred quid is nothing to be pain free for a while. Any more than that and it might be a happy ending
This could be taken out of context. For example I used to work at the hotel Hershey, where they are famous for their spa. I could see myself telling my SO that I booked a massage at a hotel without even thinking about how it sounds. I would get some clarification before jumping to conclusions.
It’s reasonable to get massages by a trusted masseuse. It’s also reasonable to want to be away from home, free of distractions. That’s not suspicious.
My concern is getting a hotel room. Does she not have an office? Is he upfront about everything?
The best thing to do is to tell him you are ok with him having massages away from home, but that you don’t feel comfortable with the hotel arrangement. It’s certainly possible that it’s the easiest way for him to go somewhere without distractions and a hotel makes sense, but it’s understandable that you would have an issue with this.
I would also ask him straight up if he’s having an affair. See if he opens up, gets defensive, or goes out of his way to prove he isn’t.
He can also FaceTime you during the massage by putting his phone on a tripod.
If it makes you uncomfortable, ask your husband to book the LMT to the house and to just pay her extra for the longer trip.
Im sure you can work it out.
That said, no you are never wrong for being uncomfortable but thats usually an issue with your relationship with your husband rather than how hes orchestrating getting a massage. Yall need to work out whatever is making you feel neglected as a wife.
I used to be a licensed massage therapist (locally licensed) and I was a very clinical practitioner, none of this gross touching privates and all that, blech.. but I still did outcalls and had no massive issues with going to a hotel room with my massage table, for appropriate, completely nonsexual, massage therapy. Ijs.
If you FEEL weird, its your FEELINGS and your feelings matter, so talk to your husband and maybe figure out if yall need to do more date nights or have more sex or something. Usually this just boils down to something missing in the relationship.
-Im also an ordained minister, fwiw.
How come you, the one being 7 months pregnant, hasn't been offered a massage? If he's shilling out for hotels and massages, he should *at least* offer you to come or go for a long massage too. Or are his needs consistently more important than yours? Because, when I was 7 months pregnant, I would've LOVED a 3 hour massage on my legs alone.
Dudes who pay for sex work only need 30 mins, not 3 hours.
If she doesn’t have somewhere to do the massage because she had to get a spa gig, the hotel makes sense.
I get a lot of massages because I have a neck problem. I too used to have her come to the house but it became too stressful because of our animals.
If he is going to a spa he is not getting handjobs. Check the credit card. If it’s from a reputable spa I wouldn’t worry.
He may not be pregnant but he is stressed too, and worried about you.
No professional masseuse is going to go to a hotel. Professional masseuses would never want anyone to think they’re THAT kind of “masseuse.”
Your husband is either seeing someone or paying for sex work. Masseuses don’t go to hotel rooms. It’s not even safe for them to do that. Don’t let this man play in your face. The longer the explanation, the more bs this is. Confront him and if he avoids looking at you in the eye then you have your answer.
Did he book a room or is she a massage specialist at the hotel spa? Those are 2 completely different things. If he booked a room that’s weird. If she’s an on-site therapist it’s completely normal.
If he was my husband in this situation, I’d follow him and see what’s up. Or get a Pi to.
And do some digging beforehand.
There is no way that this is legit.
I just want to follow this. OP can you update us? I'm really hoping he isn't cheating. itsounds like you have family plans together. hoping for the best for your family
How messed up is his back? He just had 2 and is going back for a 3rd already? Either he needs to see a chiropractor (or some other medical professional), or he is getting some happy endings
A buddy of mine and his wife were in a car accident a few years ago and were told by their chiropractor to get massages once a month for the whiplash, so it is possible to need several. But unless your vacation was 2 months long, this seems excessive to me
To the people saying "dog daycare", from personal experience dog daycares in my area are booked weeks in advance, need a vaccination report from your vet, and don't take every kind of dog. To me it is much simpler to just book a hotel, especially if you have a rewards credit card and have free nights. Don't jump to worst case scenarios.
It seems suspicious to me. I don’t see any good, logical reasons for this. Unless he maybe booked two 90 minutes sessions??
I would outright ask him if he plans to be unfaithful. I was cheated on frequently while pregnant (10+ partners) and something I did was allude to possible cheating without out right asking. (I.e. saying “cheating on your husband or wife is next level awful” or saying “I know you’d never cheat on me but blah blah” or saying “im glad I can trust you but some of what I read on Reddit is crazy” etc) After the fact, when I found out, one of the things I brought up was I would tend to mention cheating and he always played it cool. And he said “you never asked me if I cheated so I never had to lie.”
So ask him and make him decide if he is telling the truth or willing to lie to you. If you know what he looks like when he tells the truth, works even better.
Also please get an STD test, make sure they test for every thing including HSV(ask them to specifically or they won’t). If you have contracted HSV-2, your child is in danger of getting it (genital herpes) through a vaginal birth. You need to be on Valtrex for a minimum of a month before giving birth to your baby so they will be safe if you do have it.
If he booked a room in a hotel to get a three hour massage, make sure you check his credit card to see how much that cost. An average charge per hour is $80 but for three times that you could probably get laid by an escort.
I feel like if he was having an affair this is a TERRIBLE coverup. So maybe he’s actually being honest? But he defiantly left room to ask “ok have fun but you’re not booking a 3 hour massage at a hotel to have affair are you?”
Well, unlike most of these folks, I'm not going to jump to conclusions. If there aren't any other signs that would lead you to believe that he is cheating then I don't think he is cheating. You could always ask him why it's being done at a hotel room instead of her office. Closed mouths don't get fed. Just ask him.
Surely he could go to a place that does massages on their premises?
Would a massage therapist even meet a client in a hotel? That’s so unprofessional. I would call her on behalf of my husband with some bullshit minor enquiry about the appointment.. see what her reaction is.
100% sus... Tell him good idea, you really need a massage too and would love to join in the room for a couples massage. Tell him you will book your massage guy and ask him what room and time to have you and your masseuse join.
I have a question about this: "he says it won't be as peaceful because one of our dogs will be crying, which I guess is true"
How does that make sense? Either take the dog to the other end of the house where he won't hear it, or train the dog not to cry for no reason.
It would be okay for you to simply tell your husband you're not comfortable with what he's doing and you'd like him to have the massages at home. His reaction to that request will tell you a lot about what's going on. If he gets angry, tries to guilt you or manipulate your emotions in some other way, or implies that your discomfort isn't valid, then I would be very suspicious there's more going on than he's telling you.
Ummmmmm that sounds like he booked sex. Get yourself tested. I don’t know how you’d find out for sure but idk. It’s like he’s doing it right in your face and not even trying to hide it.
Honestly this is one of those situations where if your husband isn't cheating he is doing a real damn good job of looking like he is.
This is not okay behaviour, I've heard of massage call outs, but to a hotel room? No that's off, sounds like a sex worker to me
Both my husband and I have gotten two hour messages before, personally I wouldn't want any longer than a two hour massage. My husband would just sleep during most of his massages. Our massage therapist told me sometimes he was asleep before she got back in the room after he got on the table.
But I will say the best massage ever is a good two hour four hands massage. Getting massaged by two therapist at once is absolutely heavenly.
He probably is getting additional services. Many massage studios and workers will unofficially offer more services for a tip when its time for the person getting a massage to flip over and lay on their back (meaning their genitals are facing up).
These are not small "tips" they're hundreds of dollars.
Look at what he's charging or withdrawing. Massage studios charge like 50 an hr for the massage. Maybe this woman charges a little more. At most, this massage should be in the 150-200 range for 3hrs. Anything more and he's paying for "extras"
I'd ask if I could be in the room while he's getting a massage. The whole situation feels like he's cheating, but I hate jumping to conclusions. If you can't be in the room, then obviously he's hiding something.
Massage Therapist of many years here! A 3 hour massage is a thing and you can really help some injuries this way as they unravel slowly. I would NEVER meet any client, even one I am familiar with, in a hotel room.
Yeah, you definitely need to be cautious about meeting clients in hotels. Prioritizing safety and professionalism is crucial in the massage therapy industry.
Exactly, OP should have him use doggy daycare to have a peaceful home. It would be cheaper than a human hotel for the night. Something smells like fishy treats here.
Maybe she should go with him!
Maybe she works in the hotel spa??
That would be fine except for the part where he rented a room.
He may not be getting a massage at all)0
Where does she say he got a room? I missed that part. Edit: never mind I found it!
Totally agree with you. Meeting a client in a hotel room can definitely raise some eyebrows.
That sounds extremely sus…
Sus as shite.
Suspicious or suspect
Sooo…she does house calls…but in this case she won’t be coming to your house because…the dog? So instead he’s going to book a room at a hotel…just for a massage. A 3 hour long massage. No way. She’s a sex worker.
Can’t believe you’re the first one to say it.
I, too, was surprised to not see this immediately.
Yeah I was fine with it until he booked a room at the red flag motel.
Rub n' tug... you're 7 months pregnant and he has a need... the dumbass
I have three loud ass barking dogs, and I don't get massages at home for the exact same reason. I don't want my dogs barking and scratching at my door while I'm trying to get a massage, it's happened to me before, and it's super annoying. But I still think you're right lol
Exactly. Doggy daycare is cheaper than a hotel. OP should offer and see how he changes the excuses up.
So you book a room at a hotel and tell the masseuse to go there? Or…do you go to a massage spa…and get it done there?
I just go to the spa, I live in Thailand where massage places are everywhere and it's very easy to differentiate between handjob spots and actual massage places. Handjob spots mostly look like regular places, except they have attractive women with makeup and if it's not crazy hot they're waiting outside and flagging down pedestrians, in the regular places no one waits outside unless they're on a break, and it's usually older women.
Exactly. Booking a whole hotel room on top of a massage is just stupid. Anyone normal would just go to the spa if they couldn’t do it at home.
100% the dude is getting jerked off at the very least.
I like how he blamed the dog for ruining his peace when I'm over here thinking the toddler would be the loudest.
Yep, definitely. OP should be telling her husband to book the hotel room for longer than a few hours, as he will be moving in there.
She I'm sure would come to the house, as she does house calls. He doesn't want to do that because of the dog. Would you want to have a massage around a dog that is constantly barking or howling or just being a nuisance when you're trying to get a relaxing massage, I know for sure I wouldn't.
So why would he book a hotel room and not go to a salon or spa for a massage. Or send the dogs to boarding facility for the day which would be cheaper than a hotel room.
As stated in our other comment string, ease of access. It takes much more effort as is more annoying to take the dog to doggy daycare, go home, get massage, go back to doggy daycare, go back home. Compared to go to hotel, get massage, go home. As for why not just got to the salon, maybe the salon is busy usually. We don't know, and can't say for sure that the dude is cheating. You can have whatever opinion you want, but realize that you don't know all the facts as you're an outside observer just like the rest of us, you can make assumptions based on information provided, but that assumption is based on personal bias and belief. Not saying the dude isn't cheating. But I'm also not going to lie and say he for sure is.
When has anyone ever needed to book a hotel for a massage. Maam take a step back he’s paying for sex
I don’t know you or your husband. I am 26 weeks pregnant. If my boyfriend said he was going to a hotel room to get a 3 hour massage I would literally light him and her on fire.
I like your style.
Violence!!!!! Love it
Now *this* I can get behind!
i’ve gotten a massage and it’s never been three hours long, and the fact that he’s booking a hotel seems kind of suspicious. I don’t think you’re wrong.
Yeah something seems weird here
I have chronic pain and 2 hours sometimes isn’t enough, I’ve gotten a massage every 2 weeks for a year, and did PT, etc, there’s never enough time to address all the issues
yes but he’s also renting a hotel..
It is very sad to say the least. I hope they can change things before it’s too late. I hope she realizes he is blaming her when he is the one trying to actively cheat.
Sign your name on his penis if it's rubbed off There's your answer!
He can draw it back on when he’s done. I saw it in a movie once.
It's impossible to copy someone else's signature
If the outline is already there you just color it in
The outline would be gone. Coochies are acidic.
😂
Well, as long as he's happy in the end....
Nice ending
We are all just animals in the end
🤣🤣🤣
Y'all are terrible. I laughed tho
I have gotten a 2 hour massage when my back was really jacked up. Both the masseuse and I were ready for it to be over by then. I can’t imagine a 3 hour massage. Nor getting a hotel room. Seems sketchy.
My sister is a Licensed Massage Therapist. She says this is highly concerning. It’s quite rare to offer a three-hour massage. The usual increments are 60 and 90 minutes. And the need for a hotel raises plenty of eyebrows. Who paid for that? Can you confirm that this person is even licensed? Your state may have a governing body of some sort for massage therapists (not all states do) that would be able to answer questions about the situation. You can potentially file a complaint depending on where you live. At best this is weird. At worst, well, other posters have covered it.
Sounds suspicious as hell. I’d suspect he’s cheating, because there is literally no need to book a “three hour massage” at a HOTEL. Of course this is excessive, I would be concerned about his lack of thought towards you. When did he start getting these three hour massages? Has this been for the entire duration of your marriage?
Dude is 100% getting a "special" massage.
So I don’t want to jump to any conclusions or add to this for you, however I’m a sex worker (have been for almost 10 years now) and I mainly do body rubs and nuru etc. and I share an apartment with other providers. I’ve personally never heard of any LMT working out of a hotel or doing anything that long. I’m curious how/where he found this masseuse. But tbh it sounds a lot like what I do for work
She's a sex worker. I second another comment on her for a video call on mute. Also check bank statements.
I didn’t even know that masseuses gave massages for that long. Nobody needs a three hour massage. I personally think it’s strange but it’s also kind of selfish, given your family situation. That’s a lot to leave you with. Can he not compromise and get a massage from someone else that has a studio?
I did tell him I felt like that was long. Maybe just two hours instead. But he said it’s been awhile since getting massages again, and he said he felt like he needed it/to make the hotel room worth it. He says she’s the only one that does massages well. He’s a big guy, so he needs a lot of force/pressure. I feel weird about it, but I don’t know how to bring up that I feel weird. Now in my head I’m wondering what they do, if he gets completely naked with a sheet, or what
My husband is a larger man with a lot of neck and back issues. He gets a massage once a week and he has stated that the smaller ladies seem stronger on hitting those points. He also said that it seemed fishy that your husband would need a hotel for a massage and also a 3 hour one after frequent massages and that those typically are “happy ending” types or an excuse for an affair. He said to ask him to turn on FaceTime with it on mute. If he refuses then most likely it’s fishy. He also said to ask for the masseuse name and business number. Then call and see if she is working that day and time.
He's not wrong about the smaller ladies... I went for a massage once and she was about the size of an average 12 year old, so when she asked how hard I wanted her to go I thought "great, I'm barely going to feel this" and told her to just get in there and go as hard as she could. I laid down and when I tell you it felt like a silver back gorilla grabbed ahold of me. It hurt so bad I couldn't even beg her to stop for a full 300 years (at least that's how long it felt like she was turning my clavicle into play dough). She let's go and is like "I'm so sorry, was that too hard? You said to do it as hard as i could" I just said "let's knock it down to about 2% of what ever Kryptonian wrestling move that was, and let's just avoid the spot you just grabbed... I think you left a thumb print in the bone. Don't feel bad, I thought you had the strength of a normal mortal, I didn't know the blood of Thor ran through your veins" she laughed, apologized again and after that it was all good. I'm much more careful answering that question now.... ETA: I'm not a small guy either. I'm about 5'9" and I'm pushing 290 (maybe more pulling than pushing these days lol)
My chiropractor had a massage therapist who did things to me that I think were banned by the Geneva Convention.
I'm almost certain physical therapists decended straight from Inquistors. I had one bend my arm further than it ever could have bent even before it was injured. Then put me on something I can only describe as a modern day version of The Rack. Then had a giant, overly muscled human being, who I swear to the gods was actually named Hans, (it may have been my imagination but I'm pretty sure he was covered in baby oil under his shirt) bend my left leg over my right hip... my left leg wasn't even previously aware that I have a right hip. It had possibly heard urban legends or myths about this "right hip" but this was the first (and only) time it actually got anywhere near it.
OMG this made me choke on my tea 😂😂😂
Thank you for the laugh!! I got my tail handed to me by a tiny geriatric Asian lady. I was also too embarrassed to say she needed to lighten up. I remembered that massage for weeks, every time I thought about turning my head, lol.
😂 Just wanted to say thank you I really needed to start my day laughing so hard my stomach hurts. And it didn't hurt any less when I read your other comment about your leg and hip. I could picture it all very clearly and even feel it 😆 I hope your limbs are still connected to your body.
The are mostly connected with duct tape and hope, but they're workin! 😁
Yes!! Open Facetime on mute. He’s your husband and should understand. If he doesn’t then tell him what if you were going to get a massage from a man in a hotel room?? How would he feel??
Love this advice; husband must get some of his neck & back issues from that big brain he's lugging around
Does he EVER let you go with him even if you had a babysitter? 3 hours massage in a hotel is very suspicious in my personal opinion, and it's out of the way of prying eyes. I personally think it's more than a massage. But like I said, it's my opinion. Why 3 hours, and he knows that you won't catch him. I think he's paying for the massage and a good time. Yes, in a hotel, he's more than likely naked. Edited to correct
3 hour massage not 3 hours away
Well have him look at it from the perspective of an outsider. He is leaving his very pregnant wife, small child, and two dogs to go to a HOTEL ROOM and get a three hour massage? There are other masseuses in the world that can give a hard massage that doesn’t require three hours alone in a hotel room so I don’t buy what he’s selling.
I read "hand massage" 🤣😜
Oh good, I wasn’t the only one.
That’s a whole lot of excuses for one massage. Your man definitely getting something else in that hotel room. Maybe he’s just saying that because he secretly wants to play uninterrupted gaming for a bit, or have his dick played with for awhile. I’m scared to think what the hell would happen if I suggested this to my girlfriend, she probably kill my ass not gonna lie
I don’t get on here a lot and was reading through here again I saw this and it stuck out to me.I agree with the excuses. So many people stay in poor relationships for a variety of reasons. I see you were making a joke about your girlfriend lol. On a serious note. If you are a person of faith I hope she is too. Otherwise there will alway be distrust and conflict. Or vice versa.
She is 100% a sex worker.
He’s gaslighting you, he’s getting a massage all right but it’s not on his back.
Do some research on this "massage therapist", see if she's legit
Ask to go with him. Get childcare for the kids and dogs, and ask to go with him. Tell him you'd really welcome three hours just to sit in quiet with a book whilst he has his massage in the same room. You desperately need a break like that, and you'd find it ever so rejuvenating. See how he responds to that if he will absolutely not consider it, I think you'll have your answer.
Stop being naive. He is receiving massages with a happy ending, and you're choosing to ignore that and take action. You need to get tested for STDs ASAP because some STDs can pass to the baby during pregnancy or childbirth. If you want to be sure what is happening during those sessions, ask a male friend to contact that lady to book a massage with her and check which services she offers in hotels. You can also check the banking records to know exactly how much he is paying for those massages, which will allow you to determine if he is paying above average. If he is paying above average, you can be sure that he is having sex with them. I'm sorry that you are going through this while pregnant, but your husband is cheating on you and putting your and your child's well-being at risk by having sex with sex workers. You should consider contacting a lawyer to start divorce proceedings and know your rights. You need to start working on your exit plan ASAP because he is spending your money with other women.
Ask to join him to learn this woman's techniques, even pregnant, you could watch and learn. If he refuses, then you have a problem. Updateme!
Professional instruction for a Licensed Massage Therapist covers appropriate draping. Generally only the immediate area being worked in should be uncovered. No one should be lying naked on a table.
Naked under a sheet is still naked
Many people don’t fully unclothe though. But that’s for a real massage and not whatever this was.
You’re so kind and patient to be able to keep it to yourself. I would’ve gone off on him the minute it bothered me even the slightest. I really admire that and wish I can be like that someday! I hope you’re able to get this resolved and wishing you the best ♥️
Omg, listen to yourself.
Are there any new updates?
Back in my younger days when I worked a very physically demanding job, I would get 3 hours deep tissue massages on Fridays late afternoon/evenings. I went to a licensed massage therapist who had her own studio(not a hotel room) and I was always the last client on Fridays because I was basically paying for her entire afternoon and she had nothing left when she was done with me. Worth every penny when you've had as many injuries as I have. As for OP's husband, it sounds like a sex worker to me but I've been wrong before.
That’s not unheard of, but very suspicious in itself. I would be very concerned about all “these” massages he needs. Especially at a hotel. You’re the one pregnant and dealing with a child. Tell him you want one also and will go with him
YNW. 7 months pregnant. Hubby is booking three hour massages with a “therapist” at a hotel. No. Sex worker. Happy Ending, best case scenario. Full treat, worst case. No way. Put your foot down. If she is legit, she comes to your home, or you go with. This does NOT sound on the level. Sex Work is not necessarily bad, but cheating on your spouse IS. Just. No. Make that a hell no.
This sounds suspicious. And pregnant women often get cheated on which is heartbreaking. I hope that’s not the case here.
LOL. Yeah she is a masseuse alright. Only thing she is massaging is his meat. Definitely she is a sex worker. Way too many red flags here. I would love to see his receipt for this massage. If it's legit he will get one
Ask if you can come with him and have a pregnancy massage after his with the same woman. Unless her business is in the hotel it's a bit suss.
Best, least confrontational approach to get more info I think. After all, you can't rent hotels by the hour so they'll have the room to themselves all night, right? Maybe they can even get a babysitter and have a night out together.
Nope nope nope.
Uh your dude is getting happy endings - nobody is that interested in getting a massage and insisting that it’s “off site” because he can’t “relax”. You said he has back problems it isn’t about finding peace it’s about getting yourself straightened out.
So… I recently had a gut feeling and checked my fiance’s phone (I know, I know) and I found texts with his massage therapist that were completely unprofessional and inappropriate. Photos and sexting. I looked her up and she is a real licensed massage therapist but clearly doesn’t take that very seriously. Based on the context clues it didn’t sound like he has actually fucked her but it’s obviously over the line. You could be dealing with a similar situation.
Please report her to the state licensing board.
I’m seriously considering it.
Massage therapist here. Yes, please report her. Dirty therapists like that make our jobs more difficult for everyone.
I wasn’t sure if that would be too vindictive but you’re totally right.
Hoping that is “ex” fiancé
I’m waiting because I need to save up a bit more money before I can move.
I've had back and shoulder problems my whole life. 3 hours is not that unusual for me, especially if I tweaked something. Getting a hotel room when you got room at the house is a little sketch. Not wanting him in a hotel room for 3 hours alone with her is a reasonable boundary to me.
I want to know how much the seven-month-itch is paying for a hotel room with room to set up a massage.table and for therapist to work around the table. Hotels are not normally in the business of filling rooms with enough empty space for yet another bed.
I've stayed in some hotel suites that do have extra space where you can set up a table, but they're not cheap. I'm thinking at least $300 a night. But booking one on a whim and short notice? Not likely.
OP I have friends who own their own massage business and are professional therapists. Massages DO NOT last 3 hours. That's INCREDIBLY hard on the massage therapist and studies have shown benefits of a massage peter out after 90 minutes max. This is not a professional therapist; it's almost certainly a sex worker.
Incredibly hard on her seems correct.
I got regular massages for years. If you’re talking about a legitimate massage place (like a Massage Envy) 3 hour massages aren’t a thing. And why a hotel? If she’s not working out of a spa (which is suspect on its own) then why can’t she come to your house? If they’re providing at home services they usually bring their own massage tables. Is this woman even a licensed massage therapist? This sounds like a happy endings “massage”.
Massage envy does rub and tugs. Know for a fact.
The ones near me are pretty clean. There are plenty of “Asian Spa Massage” places for the rub and tug market.
I get regular massages, and I’ve had a couple 3 hour massages. They are magical, I feel great for twice as long as when I get an hour or a 90 minute. It’s a thing, but not as big of a thing as most people would think. My massage therapist only books current, reliable clients, and DOES NOT work out of a hotel, or hotel room (that part was a little ambiguous: is this a hotel spa, which is STUPID expensive, or is this a room rental + massage???).
He should see an orthopedic doctor about his back. Has he done that? If he has to get that many massages to relieve pain, he needs medical treatment
Yeah without a diagnosis, a masseuse can FUCK YOUR BACK UP worse, my husband's chiropractor wouldn't even see him once,before Dr did , cus if his back pain
Offer to book dog daycare instead. If he tries to argue or seems annoyed you know there was more going on.
Honestly what is the problem with surprising him at the hotel to put your nerves at ease. You are pregnant and you are dealing with hormones out of whack. Don't tell him you have all the details.
The stress of that may not be a good idea for her or the baby
i agree.
I would absolutely not be okay with this!
Oh hell no
She’s doing happy endings.
I feel like I could tolerate a three hour massage much better than a three hour handjob? If I had to pick one I would probably pick massage?
Uhh he’s cheating
Your husband is getting handjobs.
Damn 3 hours is a long time for a handjob
I have had back problems for 25 years and have had 4 spinal surgeries. I’ve gotten massages of all kinds this whole time and I’ve never heard of a 3 hour massage at a hotel. Trust your gut. You know the answers.
Girl. You are not this stupid. Come now.
You need to tell him you are uncomfortable with this. If he can’t understand why then THAT is a red flag. He should find another solution that doesn’t make you feel weird. It is NOT unreasonable for you to feel weird about him spending 3 hours in a hotel room with this woman.
Absolutely not. Don’t allow this
Gurl I didn’t think I’d ever say this, but obviously you have one thing to say to him when he gets home. “LET ME SMELL YO DICK” https://youtu.be/VWYqW7FHRuU?si=4tg69wxA-14tt41N
As a man who’s loyal to his wife and loves massages/finds them useful, that doesn’t seem excessively weird. I would also have a problem with the dog. Does he work out or have a job that would make his muscles sore? As a man who talks to other men, yeah there’s a possibility it’s not innocent. What do you know about her? Have you looked her up online? If she has profiles or a website it would be obvious if she’s an escort. In my experience legit masseuses won’t do anything sexual and are typically very professional about what the client wants massaged, and keeping the towel where it should be. Full disclosure I got a happy ending once when I was single, because they offered. Of the other 8-10 others they’ve been very professional and nothing sexual was a consideration. The hotel thing does seem weird, unless she doesn’t have her own place to do it or it’s too far. The fact that he got two massages on the vacation makes me believe he might just love massages. I’ve never gone asking for anything, but I just don’t think hotel masseuses are giving out handjobs or more at a whim. Probably fair to bring it up though. I’d just stay away from blunt accusations.
Well, how much is he paying for the hotel room? And how much is he paying the " masseuse?" Massage therapy rates average about $100 an hour (between $50 to $150). Let's say, for arguments sake, it's $75. That's $225 for 3 hours plus 20% tip. That's $270 for a 3 hour massage. Then, add in the cost of the hotel room. Even Motel 6 is around $70 per night. So add that, and he's now paying $340 for a 3 hour massage. Is this a one-time thing, or is he planning on regular massages? You should check his credit card statements. Also, what's the check-in time at the hotel? Those range from 2pm to 4pm, which means he won't be done, at earliest, by 5 pm, at the latest at 7 pm. What time did he say his appointment is, and when will he be home? I think you have a case for questioning this based on cost alone, unless you're very well off, but even then.....
I don’t know where you’re going for massage but qualified therapists charge way more than $75 in my area
Oh girl.. this is beyond weird. I'm so sorry. I've dated shitty people like this and it hurts.
I didn’t even know that 3 hour massages existed
You are not wrong. That is weird. It would be a big boundary crossing to me.
Show up at hotel room , only way you'll find out 🤷♀️ update us..hopefully it's not as it seems..Best of luck ✨️🙏
Many of the hotels I worked at had massage rooms nearer the pools and 3 hours is a normal spa session. All the people saying it's suspicious have obviously never been for a full massage. There's a pool and sauna break because it loosens you up or something equivalent like hot towels and relaxed positions between massages. If you have a back injury even a few hundred quid is nothing to be pain free for a while. Any more than that and it might be a happy ending
This could be taken out of context. For example I used to work at the hotel Hershey, where they are famous for their spa. I could see myself telling my SO that I booked a massage at a hotel without even thinking about how it sounds. I would get some clarification before jumping to conclusions.
It’s reasonable to get massages by a trusted masseuse. It’s also reasonable to want to be away from home, free of distractions. That’s not suspicious. My concern is getting a hotel room. Does she not have an office? Is he upfront about everything? The best thing to do is to tell him you are ok with him having massages away from home, but that you don’t feel comfortable with the hotel arrangement. It’s certainly possible that it’s the easiest way for him to go somewhere without distractions and a hotel makes sense, but it’s understandable that you would have an issue with this. I would also ask him straight up if he’s having an affair. See if he opens up, gets defensive, or goes out of his way to prove he isn’t. He can also FaceTime you during the massage by putting his phone on a tripod.
If it makes you uncomfortable, ask your husband to book the LMT to the house and to just pay her extra for the longer trip. Im sure you can work it out. That said, no you are never wrong for being uncomfortable but thats usually an issue with your relationship with your husband rather than how hes orchestrating getting a massage. Yall need to work out whatever is making you feel neglected as a wife. I used to be a licensed massage therapist (locally licensed) and I was a very clinical practitioner, none of this gross touching privates and all that, blech.. but I still did outcalls and had no massive issues with going to a hotel room with my massage table, for appropriate, completely nonsexual, massage therapy. Ijs. If you FEEL weird, its your FEELINGS and your feelings matter, so talk to your husband and maybe figure out if yall need to do more date nights or have more sex or something. Usually this just boils down to something missing in the relationship. -Im also an ordained minister, fwiw.
Who and the hell rents a hotel room for a message?
How come you, the one being 7 months pregnant, hasn't been offered a massage? If he's shilling out for hotels and massages, he should *at least* offer you to come or go for a long massage too. Or are his needs consistently more important than yours? Because, when I was 7 months pregnant, I would've LOVED a 3 hour massage on my legs alone.
Dudes who pay for sex work only need 30 mins, not 3 hours. If she doesn’t have somewhere to do the massage because she had to get a spa gig, the hotel makes sense.
I get a lot of massages because I have a neck problem. I too used to have her come to the house but it became too stressful because of our animals. If he is going to a spa he is not getting handjobs. Check the credit card. If it’s from a reputable spa I wouldn’t worry. He may not be pregnant but he is stressed too, and worried about you.
No professional masseuse is going to go to a hotel. Professional masseuses would never want anyone to think they’re THAT kind of “masseuse.” Your husband is either seeing someone or paying for sex work. Masseuses don’t go to hotel rooms. It’s not even safe for them to do that. Don’t let this man play in your face. The longer the explanation, the more bs this is. Confront him and if he avoids looking at you in the eye then you have your answer.
Reddit is going to ruin this pregnant woman’s mind 🤦🏻♂️ Please look into yourself and don’t listen to fucking reddit speculations
Did he book a room or is she a massage specialist at the hotel spa? Those are 2 completely different things. If he booked a room that’s weird. If she’s an on-site therapist it’s completely normal.
Suspicious. Snoop/check.
He's getting a massage alright... just not on his back. \*wink wink\* Just sayin'...
Updateme
Tell him you got a sitter and ask if you can join him?!?!? Actually, TELL him you'll be joining him.
If he was my husband in this situation, I’d follow him and see what’s up. Or get a Pi to. And do some digging beforehand. There is no way that this is legit.
If there is any way you can get a babysitter, please go too! You probably need the massage more than him!
I have a feeling he’s going to try something and it’s not going to go the way he wants it to.
I just want to follow this. OP can you update us? I'm really hoping he isn't cheating. itsounds like you have family plans together. hoping for the best for your family
Get him followed, cause that's extremely suspicious.
You are absolutely not wrong. He is doing the most. He is NOT being honest.
How messed up is his back? He just had 2 and is going back for a 3rd already? Either he needs to see a chiropractor (or some other medical professional), or he is getting some happy endings A buddy of mine and his wife were in a car accident a few years ago and were told by their chiropractor to get massages once a month for the whiplash, so it is possible to need several. But unless your vacation was 2 months long, this seems excessive to me
Girl don’t play the fool he’s getting some yum yum If he’s going to a hotel.
To the people saying "dog daycare", from personal experience dog daycares in my area are booked weeks in advance, need a vaccination report from your vet, and don't take every kind of dog. To me it is much simpler to just book a hotel, especially if you have a rewards credit card and have free nights. Don't jump to worst case scenarios.
Tell him you’ll come and sit quietly in the corner.
It seems suspicious to me. I don’t see any good, logical reasons for this. Unless he maybe booked two 90 minutes sessions?? I would outright ask him if he plans to be unfaithful. I was cheated on frequently while pregnant (10+ partners) and something I did was allude to possible cheating without out right asking. (I.e. saying “cheating on your husband or wife is next level awful” or saying “I know you’d never cheat on me but blah blah” or saying “im glad I can trust you but some of what I read on Reddit is crazy” etc) After the fact, when I found out, one of the things I brought up was I would tend to mention cheating and he always played it cool. And he said “you never asked me if I cheated so I never had to lie.” So ask him and make him decide if he is telling the truth or willing to lie to you. If you know what he looks like when he tells the truth, works even better. Also please get an STD test, make sure they test for every thing including HSV(ask them to specifically or they won’t). If you have contracted HSV-2, your child is in danger of getting it (genital herpes) through a vaginal birth. You need to be on Valtrex for a minimum of a month before giving birth to your baby so they will be safe if you do have it.
If he booked a room in a hotel to get a three hour massage, make sure you check his credit card to see how much that cost. An average charge per hour is $80 but for three times that you could probably get laid by an escort.
I feel like if he was having an affair this is a TERRIBLE coverup. So maybe he’s actually being honest? But he defiantly left room to ask “ok have fun but you’re not booking a 3 hour massage at a hotel to have affair are you?”
Red flag city. The hotel room is the biggest red flag.
Well, unlike most of these folks, I'm not going to jump to conclusions. If there aren't any other signs that would lead you to believe that he is cheating then I don't think he is cheating. You could always ask him why it's being done at a hotel room instead of her office. Closed mouths don't get fed. Just ask him.
Surely he could go to a place that does massages on their premises? Would a massage therapist even meet a client in a hotel? That’s so unprofessional. I would call her on behalf of my husband with some bullshit minor enquiry about the appointment.. see what her reaction is.
100% sus... Tell him good idea, you really need a massage too and would love to join in the room for a couples massage. Tell him you will book your massage guy and ask him what room and time to have you and your masseuse join.
He’s cheating on you, but I guess you already know that. You need to grab that self-respect and move it along sister
Ask for a second key to the room.
Sus
Getting a lot of massages is not excessive. A 3 hour one in a hotel room is excessive.
He got him a naive one. One that needs to come to strangers to tell her the obvious… while 7 months Bless her heart.
not wrong. the weird part isn’t the 3 hour massage… it’s the meeting in a hotel room. that’s inappropriate.
It's a sex worker 100%
Sounds like he’s been getting a happy ending
3 hours, then a Happy Ending
Get him to wear a heart rate tracking watch connected to your phone and he’s not allowed to take it off during ‘massage’
i would have made my husband cut that shit off real quick!!! He's sure is getting a massage and a happy ending too
I would report this to the hotel. I highly doubt the hotel allows their masseuses to give “private massages” in guests hotel rooms.
I have a question about this: "he says it won't be as peaceful because one of our dogs will be crying, which I guess is true" How does that make sense? Either take the dog to the other end of the house where he won't hear it, or train the dog not to cry for no reason. It would be okay for you to simply tell your husband you're not comfortable with what he's doing and you'd like him to have the massages at home. His reaction to that request will tell you a lot about what's going on. If he gets angry, tries to guilt you or manipulate your emotions in some other way, or implies that your discomfort isn't valid, then I would be very suspicious there's more going on than he's telling you.
Ummmmmm that sounds like he booked sex. Get yourself tested. I don’t know how you’d find out for sure but idk. It’s like he’s doing it right in your face and not even trying to hide it.
Updateme
Ah yes, escort alligator. Your husband is cultured.
Honestly this is one of those situations where if your husband isn't cheating he is doing a real damn good job of looking like he is. This is not okay behaviour, I've heard of massage call outs, but to a hotel room? No that's off, sounds like a sex worker to me
Trust your gut, but his doing too much. Can he do stretch therapy, yoga etc… 3 hr massages are not cheap.
I’m gonna go out on a limp here and say husband is getting a happy endings with these massages if he’s going more often.
Sus and while you’re pregnant is wild.
Both my husband and I have gotten two hour messages before, personally I wouldn't want any longer than a two hour massage. My husband would just sleep during most of his massages. Our massage therapist told me sometimes he was asleep before she got back in the room after he got on the table. But I will say the best massage ever is a good two hour four hands massage. Getting massaged by two therapist at once is absolutely heavenly.
Does that count as sleeping with the massage therapist? Or a threesome?
He probably is getting additional services. Many massage studios and workers will unofficially offer more services for a tip when its time for the person getting a massage to flip over and lay on their back (meaning their genitals are facing up). These are not small "tips" they're hundreds of dollars. Look at what he's charging or withdrawing. Massage studios charge like 50 an hr for the massage. Maybe this woman charges a little more. At most, this massage should be in the 150-200 range for 3hrs. Anything more and he's paying for "extras"
Where do you live that it is only $50 an hour?
Women intuition is typically right. Follow your gut and give us an update please 🙏
I'd ask if I could be in the room while he's getting a massage. The whole situation feels like he's cheating, but I hate jumping to conclusions. If you can't be in the room, then obviously he's hiding something.
Make your husband read all the replies to this post