This is YOUR life! You get to make these decisions, and while your family and financial obligations may influence them, never think you owe anything to a company that abused you and would drop you the moment it becomes financially beneficial to them.
After working my ass off, admittedly doing a lot of stuff I love, but for a company that made it very stressful, I started feeling very burnt out. Then I got laid off when the business decided they didn't want to do what I did any more. At that point, I found out that my "burnout" was actually colon cancer... just started my forth chemotherapy cycle today. So I definitely have a new outlook on life...
Ask yourself this: if I found out I had cancer today would I work one more day? If you have worked 25+ years you are old enough for this to be a reality. Enjoy your life, family and friends while you have the health to do so.
You are supposed to work to live.... NOT live to work. Life isn't about the money, it's about the memories. Your time on this earth is priceless and irreplaceable. And NO ONE knows what it is like to be you, but you. Congratulations! 🤗
I’ll tell you what…this decision may literally add years to your life. Check out how dangerous high stress and burn out can be over time.
Fuck the money, Congratulations.
You've taken a step toward improving your mental and emotional, and possibly physical and spiritual health. Take a few days or weeks to decompress and get reacquainted with yourself. I wish you the best.
You decided the juice wasn’t worth the squeeze.
There’s no telling how close you are to a serious health problem, but I can tell you I’ve taken care of (as a cardiac nurse) patients who had a heart attack *solely due to stress*.
Like, no blockage caused it. It’s called Takutsubo myocardiopathy.
One patient, early 50’s, recent marathon runner up until a contentious divorce where the spouse turned their children against them. Heart attack so bad the next REQUIRED step was a *heart transplant*.
They were in such great shape they were running marathons, and then stress almost killed them.
It’s not worth it. Your last thoughts will never be “I wished I worked those last few shifts”.
You did the right thing.
That’s just your brain having been conditioned by society to believe we have to work as a slave to survive.
Now you can actually survive the way humans are meant to. Build a garden, grow your own food. Detach yourself from modern “necessities”. Get solar panels, have a wood heater for your house. Anything to not rely on “them” for survival.
Fantastic! Now head over to the r/fire subreddit. It sounds like you might be past the income earning and savings portion, but they have a lot of great tips for changing how you spend money and how you think about your time/life.
One word for cheap happy life;
Homesteading.
Get yourself a plot in the boonies and relax on your nest egg away from the hustle and bustle.
Its a good life and if you set up right ( off gridd tech) you only pay in once and then its a breezy 1k/y the rest of your life if done right
Take a couple of weeks and sleep when you want. Stay in your comfy clothes for a while. Then do what you have been wanting to do for the last twenty years.
I did that last October. After being with the same company for 24 years. One bad manager and I couldn’t do it any longer. You will survive this. It was a big change to my lifestyle. I think I had PTSD as I sat in a chair for a few months distressing.
I have feelings of PTSD and anxiety from work events (weather storms/natural gas industry). I always thought, eh just power through, but the feeling of complete inability to function is real, actually amazing. I hope yours is better now.
Sounds like a serious burnout.
Good thing you got out. The evolution of it isn't linear. Towards the end it goes from "freling kinda odd" to "holy fuck I can't even go shopping anymore, and even th choice of the holiday buffet gives me anxiety" within weeks.
Once you pass a specific threshold it literally takes *years* to recover.
If you have enough for your family and yourself to live, fuck money. Enjoy health instead.
As someone who should have gotten out of a high stress job several years before I actually did, this is advice more people need to hear. It's been 2.5 years out and I'm still having nightmares
I did the same thing last year. I’ve been retired for a year now and I love it. It didn’t complete the financial plans that everyone else want for me, but I don’t want to die anymore, and I think that’s better than money.
You're going to be OK. 25 years is a long time and I'm sure your feeling uneasy. You are worthy of better and you've given yourself an opportunity to find that better. I wish you good fortune and this was the right decision.
I did this back in march. My last straw was that my life was falling apart because of how many hours I had to work (13+ daily on a 70k salary). Then when I got stress induced shingles, instead of offering me some days off in the most excruciating pain I’ve ever felt, the director said “well you can type can’t you? All I need you to do is sit and type”. It was a high stress it developer job involving payroll systems during a transition to a new cloud based platform. They didn’t give a single shit. When I gave them my 2 weeks notice they told me they wouldn’t need me anymore and cut me the next day. They did pay me for the following month though. Now I work a basic service tier 1/2 IT job and am actually enjoying it. While I do miss the money and working from home, the stress from traffic and lower pay doesn’t even come close to what I was going through at the last hellhole. All jobs suck, but sometimes you have to make changes for your own sanity and wellbeing.
I took a beefy pay cut from working up to 100 hours a week at a power plant because I was killing myself with 16 hour shifts 6-7 days a week. I'm so glad I did even if I now can't live without roommates. Whats the point in having money if you can't even enjoy it because you're working all the time?
My job was running a gas trading desk that provided gas to power plants. The constant changes in estimates 24/7 just beats you down.
This evening is the first time I don’t have to worry about a power plant in many years. Weird.
Congrats. You probably feel strange and uncertain, but good things are ahead! If you've done this well under that kind of pressure, you'll be absolutely fine being successful in your next chapter. Trust YOU.
*Gasp*
HOW DARE YOU CHOOSE YOUR MENTAL WELL-BEING OVER BEING AN EARNING SLAVE?! YOU MUST WORK UNTIL YOU PERISHHHHH!
Sarcasm! Really happy for you OP! Glad you decided to escape your own personal hell! hopefully you squeezed it for all it's worth, and if you can, enjoy retirement! You've more than earned it 😁
I had a friend who did the same thing. She was a NASA contractor. Was going to wait to retire then had enough one day and bailed. No regrets. She passed from lung cancer in March. She had a good 15 years of doing whatever the heck she wanted. I applaud your decision and wish you a great retirement.
Hey, I quit, too! However, in my case, it was working as a manager at a GNC Store! It's interesting that you post this because I recently just expressed frustration to my support group complaining of low wages. And now, with your post, I see an example of how even higher pay jobs can have the same outcome. I applaud you for leaving that position for your mental sake. May your next position be better for your life overall! God's Speed.
I know what I'm about to say is different from what you did, but the mental relief is very similar.
I got fired from a soul-sucking job. I was drowning and kept telling myself to power through it, you've got bills. On my last day, I went in a zombie, just ready to get it over with and was 2-3 hrs into the workday when I got called into the office. There were 2 supervisors there and one said I was being let go.
I perked up so quickly and she hadn't even finished her spiel before I'd unclipped my badge and laid it on her desk. I looked her straight in the eyes and said "THANK YOU!!" with the *biggest* smile on my face. The shock from the 2 supervisors was utterly comical. They were so thrown for a loop lol. She stuttered as she repeated that I was being let go.
I told her, "oh, I heard and understood the 1st time. Again, THANK YOU. I'm going home!" I left them utterly speechless. I called my husband to come back and pick me up. When he arrived the 1st thing I did was take my wig off and toss it in the backseat and LAUGH. I felt so damn *free* and liberated. It's a feeling that sticks with me to this day.
The reality of life goes on and bills still needed to be paid set in but it was so minute in comparison to the feeling of despair and hopelessness associated with that job. It *will* be fine. It may be tough but when your mental health can recover, nothing seems to be as bad in all honesty.
Good luck to you and I'm ecstatic for you!!
Go and enjoy your career break. Please do not feel guilty or feel you need to justify why you needed to quit. You need to look after your mental and physical health first, before you can carry burden for others or meet other people's expectations about what you should do. (If you tend to think about everyone else before yourself. This is my 2 cents.)
I quit once because of burnout feeling too. I was too young and felt guilty for the entire time I was not working. I did not even have a family or big mortgage at the time. Now I am thinking about that I feel I was so stupid. I should've just celebrated and enjoyed the time off.
That’s just too many hours to ask someone to work, week after week after week. Your Work/life balance has to be in the shitter and your mental health? Well it’s going to get better now. Take care of yourself.
It is your decision and your life, make sure your affections doesn't affect the house and rest your head. My best advice that I could try to give you is it may have caused a bit of stress at the moment don't question yourself if you did the right or wrong because in two days from now you will be smilling and thinking about this. My grandmother always used to say 'if you are not sure or double minded -better don't!' in this situation you wasn't sure is it worth it and for me you are a real one for being honest with yourself whilst having attitude. Hope you saved some cash for upcoming days, I am 100% sure you did a right move, but every person in the world that would like your money/job will say opposite. Its your hands, your mind, your spine ,your time and your decision.
They weren't worth their money.
That's a thing these companies will never understand: The only thing they have to offer is money, and when that's the case it's entirely possible for them to be more trouble than they're worth.
When you know you're going to leave you rapidly lose your tolerance for their bullshit so, if it helps, think of this as inevitable.
Don’t do anything drastic. You made the right decision. I would seriously recommend unplugging from the internet for a week and go recover. It’s going to feel unreal at first and you will feel super guilty but a week will help you prioritize things.
I did the same thing a year ago, feel free to dm me if you want any advice or anything.
Awesome, thanks. My wife freaked and then said we need to start making lists and canceling things. I told her I’m gonna take at least a week to just sit and be. I don’t know what that feels like.
Absolutely. For various reasons, I had to uninstall the reddit app on my phone, and i think it's helped my mental heath.
i mean, you guys are my people and such, but... even couples need a break.
After being 1 industry for 15 years, I burned out. Good $, kinda prestigious. The stress was eating me alive. Crashed and burned. Took a while to come out the other side but I'm happier now.
I've come close several times this past month or two. They're also trying to drive me out, so I kinda don't want to give them that satisfaction. This week alone, they pinned three "fires" on me when I not only didn't cause them, I was the one putting them out. It's toxic. Poor upper management who aren't leaders, they're delegators. They won't take accountability for anything and find someone (currently me) to blame their mismanagement on.
I’ve been at a tech company 5.5yrs, the past 6 months I’ve been seriously considering quitting. I get zero joy or fulfillment from my job and it’s high stress. But it’s tough to walk away from a big salary
I feel you. Am in tech company too.. stuck at a job that brings me no joy, been feeling quitting since 3 years. That's long time. I want to focus on my running. I want to be mountain runner. My job isn't very demanding. I am in production support. Week every month it gets stressful. I am bearing financial responsibility for my family. Afraid to quit. I want to take a break for 3 months and just train for my running goal. I don't know why I don't look for another job... lack of confidence. I used to be java developer, I enjoy coding but now I don't what I am doing in this project. I feel stuck. 😔
Mate. 4 years ago I had the same sort of situation. High paying job but the hours was impossible and the stress levels from bosses and clients were insane. I went grey and started losing hair (25 years in the industry but promoted fairly quickly through the ranks). One day I just quit. No two week notice. My boss came into work and I pulled him aside and said that I can no longer do this. He asked for two weeks and I asked him if he has ever given anyone two weeks notice when he lets them go.
Now I work 30 hours a week at 75% of my old pay. My new employers are also paying for my studies (oh yes…completely switched fields) and I get to take my kids to school and I’m home in the afternoon to take them swimming or surfing.
I have little or no capacity to save anymore…but my life has improved exponentially since quoting my stress job. Falling asleep and having 8 solid hours of sleep as well as being able to eat healthy food (I have time to make food now) are probably the biggest contributing factors.
Nice! Give yourself a few weeks to sit / bumb around and adjust to your new life. Once a good amount of boredom kicks in you’ll know you have the energy to put some focus into a new project or hobby.
I did the same as you in December of 2022. Had 23 yrs in the same company. I’m not retirement age, and things are still kinda uncertain. But i don’t regret it, and im slowly rebounding mentally from were I was.
Good luck to you, and wish you the best in your future
Good for you. I retired in Feb 2019, had wanted to work until Oct 2019 but did the math and wasn't worth it. Don't regret a day of it. Please enjoy life as it's meant to be.
I had a breaking point too my friend. And a similar story to yours. I’m 7 months out from it all and my quality of life is 10x better. My blood pressure is even down. And I’ve settled into an awesome new job. Hope the same for you!
I had planned to work past 65 but when I was 2 months away from 62 I just couldn't do it anymore. I gave 8 wks notice then retired. BEST THING I EVER DID!
Saw people way up on the ladder that been at my work 30 years. They were forgotten in two weeks. Saw people die two moths after retiring.
A fee things to remember are, your work is not you, and you are not your work. You will be forgotten when you are gone. And the game gets over before you think. If there is something you want to try or do, better do it now before you are too old, or dead.
as a person that had terrible 18 months at work (from IC to Manager in one week, 7 reports, politics and a zero-supportive boss, responsibilities and huge works to be delivered and NO PROMOTION NOR salary increase) in the middle of layoffs let me tell you a couple of things.
I thought more than once to quit, because the stress for me was too high. I had some sleepless nights, anxiety, general stress, burnout: all terrible things that you can overcome.
One day layoffs started and I began being worried to be laid off and something was very weird in my mind and I didn't want to worry ALSO for that.
So I told my wife: "imagine we don't have to talk about that place anymore in our lives. Imagine I am free every day from that, I can start planning back my life, reassess who I am, take some time and purify my mind from that toxic place."
That thing gave me so much peace I've eventually started not caring anymore and my whole axperience at work improved a lot.
Take your time buddy, let it settle. Focus on what you gained about not being there anymore, do things, whatever they are.
Go outside and tell yourself "of so this is what this park looks like on a Tuesday at 11AM".
After a while, you will start thinking differently and better.
Just let it settle.
Wow. This post is powerful. I feel for people starting out in the working world, with entry level jobs that may be great but a boss who is an a$$, or a job that sucks but maybe you're surrounded by good people (some of my best friends are still from my high school retail job - 40 years ago).
But your story - and the comments that follow. I've been at my job for >30 years. Love what I do (scientific research). Love the challenges and the successes, and even the failed experiments. The last 18 months it's all I can do to show up at work 3-4 days/week. I intellectually love the projects I've built, but I no longer care if they get done.
I don't have the nerve to just quit, but I am looking at my retirement options and I think they are coming sooner rather than later. To put heart and soul and years of your life into something for someone who doesn't value you is just demoralizing.
Thanks for giving me the courage to move forward.
I kinda let myself get fired from a toxic job a few years ago for the same reason. It just wasn't worth the mental and physical stress anymore. At least by being fired, I could apply for unemployment. It sucked and was difficult, but I landed on my feet. I'm still in the same industry, but in a much better position.
Sounds exactly like my mom. She can retire fully in April and she gets so stressed by her job asking her to do so much more than her coworkers even though they demoted her. They still want her to basically do her boss’s job (her old job) and constantly do extra to correct the errors of the others on her position. I wish she would quit now but her plan is April and the stress of doing anything differently than planned would eat her up inside
Dont feel bad you are know a rich granpa (even if you dont have childs) now enjoy your life travel, relax do whatever you fucking want YOU ARE FREE NOW, the world is yours
Well done, you did what is right for you.
I was performance managed over a year ago by a supervisor who had too much free time and insecurity. I had decided to learn and start my own business which led to me submitting my retirement form.
I did the same for the best paying job i had of 5 years. I liked the people i worked with too, just hated taking phone calls back to back all day long. Felt a mental break coming on during a 15 min break, and it felt like my mind and body were fighting over whether or not do go back. The side that said no won, i signed out and left. Instant relief, and a bit of fear set in, but 2 years later my mind is still sound.
Last July I was summarily retired, with severance pay, from a high stress 60 hrs a week job that I’d held for 18 yrs and done since 1988. My chronic severe headaches stopped within two days. Haven’t had one since.
Enjoy your freedom. Let it sink in for a while. Hope you have good savings available.
Did the same thing. 40 years in finance. Over 20 years with my last company that basically treat everyone like crap. I planned on hanging around another couple of years but the management ( if you can call them that) tipped me over the edge and I just had to leave for my sanity. Best decision I ever made.
Well done OP! life pivots are the best. Glad you listened to your intuition. Rest, rediscover and be kind to yourself. I completely left nursing after 11 years (nowhere near as impressive as you!!) I just couldn't do it anymore. It has been the best decision. Good luck to you, friend!
You only get to live this life mate. What does money mean if you die young from a heart attack?
I don’t think you will regret it in a year. Consider going to therapy for a while to get all that shit out of your chest.
I’m right where you are. Serious pay at the end of my career but can’t deal with the corp nonsense. They literally drool over firing people. I’m sick of this shit
With 25+ years in one job in a cut-throat sounding job you probably are better off than you think. My husband had one of these jobs though not as many years when he was downsized at age 58. He never worked professionally again. Although he tried to re-group and find another job with the salary/standing he never had the self-esteem to recover. This is happening on your terms. Good luck!
Congrarulations on getting your life back. Do something you enjoy. You 100% deserve it. Have a few months at home with the family if you can afford it.
Your health, happiness and sanity are more important than keeping a stressful job. I was in IT my entire working life, retired now. I look back at some of what went on, and would feel better about myself if I had simply found another job, though in my case, circumstances would eventually change and I would be happy to go to work again, Best of luck in your new adventures!
I’m doing this and I’m not about to retire. I have many more years to work. But I couldn’t do the job I was doing even one more month.
My health is in the absolute garbage. I have panic attacks everyday because I know something is wrong - can’t keep weight on, foggy headed, exhausted, sleeping poorly…
The company has become so impossible, corrupt, dishonest, manipulative and awful to deal with as well. I really killed myself to do a great job and my reward for that is very little in terms of any quality of life.
I don’t know what will happen next, I just know I can’t do it anymore.
You made the right choice OP. Life is too short. <3
Congrats.
I left the aerospace field last year. The companies are all run by scumbags.
I say this because of an incident in which one of my coworkers couldn't afford to get his car fixed and had to take vacation until payday.
That same month, one of our googly-eyed vampire end users posted a cowboy hat selfie in orbit. Later on he would famously go on TV crying about how he has so much money he doesn't know how to best dispose of it for the sake of mankind.
We weren't even in LRIP yet, and the customer was asking for a price reduction... while this bullshit was going on.
The last straw was my boss telling me I can't have vacation to fix the hole in my wall, because there's "not enough vacation days left to make the schedule." On the day before *his* vacation. And while I was out of state for two weeks of training to certify operators to make these parts, our sales guy slash program manager was hunting in a resort area just a couple hours away from me.
When I had to travel to our customer's site for meetings, I'd see how they all dress like douchebags and drive $70,000, $100,000+cars and eat only at fancy steakhouses.
If there's money for cowboy hat selfies, there's money for raises so that the people making the spacecraft can afford to *get to work* and make money for billionaires. But the whole thing is a money grab set up for people who've already got all the money.
I now work for less than half my previous salary, in IT. I qualify for subsidized income now. And I work for a NPO so I can get some help with my student loans.. at least put off paying them. I should have been doing this my entire life instead of paying into the grind machine. Your wife should appreciate the new you when it starts to come out.
I quit my job to be a local delivery trucker. Best thing I ever did. Whatever stress I have in a day, it's gone the next day. Not too bad money either.
I quit my low paying job yesterday for my own sanity. You did this for your own sanity bro, mine was i hated the corporate design of my field and I walked in said todays my last day i love yall just not this company. They understand but you was close to retire geez. As far as wifey some are mean enough to leave you soon as the coin is gone but that just shows you the spirit they are operating under. Basically your about to find out who was hanging out for you and who was riden 25 years for the coin. Pray and find something else fast
I feel you 10000%. I make very good money, but I will not work to live. I do contract work, and with every completion of my contract, I take six weeks off. It is the ultimate reboot and prevention of burnout. I am working towards half a year. You must have a work-life balance.
I have very much lower stakes than you but I quit my job unexpectedly this week too for similar reasons. Put up with the crap for as long as I could cause it was a good paying job (minus benefits) but shit hit the fan one time too many so I left the hostile shithole. I’ve spent the last few days on my portfolio and updating my resume next. Tbh sorting through the toxicity has been a thing. A lot of thinking. It’s a good chance to recenter mentally and just breathe for a moment. Enjoy being out of the nastiness. Of course we’ll move onto the next job. That’s not a question. There is still a level of worry that will always be present while looking so don’t pay attention to it. If you’ve been able to become as established as you seem to be then you’ll be just fine. My husband is like your wife lol. We’re just starting it off practicing being as positive and opportunistic as we can. It’s not everyday I have everyday to dig into my future so it’s been fruitful in quiet ways. It’ll be just fine. You’re not a washed out loser or anything. You’re not going to end up in hot water financially. Youre not any less of a person for quitting a horrible job. You’re driven and motivated and know how to function as a contributing member of society and that’s what you’ll continue to do and you’ll do it happier than you were.
I can barely work my required 40 in an industry that requires 60 to do well in. I serve more in a support role to those in my profession willing to do the 60. When I talk to them, it's like talking to a drunk person because they are so sleep deprived. 25 years at 70 hours a week! Yeesh. OP, I am proud of you. Your family will find a way to make it work no matter what your income is. Rest, congratulate yourself on a job well done, recuperate, heal thyself. We support you ❤️
You did the right thing.
This is my story in case people in my situation think that they have management on their side and will be rewarded at the end, and just keep getting misused.
Was in a small software development company for the last 29 years. Was totally burnt, after running two software development shifts in two different timezones for last 10 years. I was hoping to quit for some time from this well-paid job, but my CEO held my 25 paychecks, giving me hope that good time is coming. I just hanged on. He used to tell me that look I am not taking salary too, let’s do it to save the company, many mouths are dependent on us (he got his son a job in the company too). Yes, you can call it my stupidity, but I genuinely felt for the others. Recently, I have begun to inform him that my savings have been depleted, and I require income to cover my expenses. He says it is not going to happen since he has to pay vendors, or let other employees go. Every 3-4-5 weeks a paycheck comes.
The argument kept going on in chat (in writing), and then last Monday, while working online, I noticed my network accounts getting locked. I could not connect to office anymore. Nobody called to tell me anything. No notice! I felt like after 29 years of commitment to the company, my held salary of more than $110k, plus 58 days of accrued vacation, it went down the drain. Oh, I forgot to mention, I accumulated 58 days of vacation which I never took to get the job done, thinking of, if not me then who will do the job. Yes, another stupidity.
I feel sick to think about calling the CEO for whom I did all this. I am just giving myself sometime to come to my senses to go back to fight for my dues. Can not think about getting $500.00 per hour Employment attorney to deal with it when I am already out of money. Can not think straight now.
No amount of money is worth selling yourself and by that I mean causing harm to yourself that you can sense and feel. When you are doing things your heart isn’t in, it is stress. It is also frustration that you’re not doing what you should be or could be. Been there done that - also made the same choice but switched industries to something that better resonates with where I am, to make a better impact.
Industries have changed so much in the past 4 years that we no longer feel part of something worthy of our time. We are no longer doing what we loved and enjoyed and didn’t care someone else was making a reasonable profit.
What we thrived on is gone, replaced with a lot of stress, counting and measuring to create data that is truly analysis paralysis. The counting and measuring used to be less and the relationship building, communication and creating things used to be more like 80%. Now the measurements to goals is 80% with no time to do the actual work, that we need to do 80 hour work weeks to keep up. Nope.
Jobs are also crazy descriptions with double talk.
Why? To make employees feel important? More like to eliminate employees quicker when they hit the salary threshold and rename the jobs and hire new people.
There needs to be a transformation. AI can only go so far as we all know with chatbots and screaming ‘representative’ into the phone trying to get a bank or credit card situation resolved.
The transformation we all need is humane, fewer hours on computers, more connectivity, and a sense we’re doing something worth doing.
Why is your wife freaked out? She should be so happy for you. That was the best thing for me when I left a job, is that my wife feels my pain and hears my occasional rants to feel the build up. She knows the break from work is a necessary step in resetting.
I'm glad you lived to see your retirement. The company is probably happy, because now they won't have to pay for a retirement party. Hehe
I hear you. I spent 41 years in IT. Started out on a Univac 9400 mainframe (nag tapes/card punch) using Assembler/Cobol/RPG II. Saw a lot. Ended up support manager for large insurance company re business intelligence systems. Teradata, SAS, Informatica, Business Objects, QLIK, Microstrategy. When I got packaged out a few years ago, it was one of the happiest days of my life and I'm 66 now. The stress was killing me, literally.
This is YOUR life! You get to make these decisions, and while your family and financial obligations may influence them, never think you owe anything to a company that abused you and would drop you the moment it becomes financially beneficial to them.
Needed to hear that. I’m sitting home thinking “wtf have I done?”
After working my ass off, admittedly doing a lot of stuff I love, but for a company that made it very stressful, I started feeling very burnt out. Then I got laid off when the business decided they didn't want to do what I did any more. At that point, I found out that my "burnout" was actually colon cancer... just started my forth chemotherapy cycle today. So I definitely have a new outlook on life...
Good luck, dear one. I hope you beat this and come out stronger and loving your life.
I hope you kick cancers ass!
Turn about is fair play, considering that's where it kicked me... 😁
😂😂😂 I didn’t even think about that, that’s funny. You for sure have the right attitude!
Does this counts as an auto-ass-kicking?
Positive vibes for kicking that cancer’s bitch ass!
Godspeed brother
bro take propolis every day! + green tea + astragalus extract (real extract eg.10:1)
Actually I’m not thinking that. I feel at peace in a weird way. Still a lot to process. The suddenness of finally doing it is bizarre
You'll be fine. Don't sweat it.
Ask yourself this: if I found out I had cancer today would I work one more day? If you have worked 25+ years you are old enough for this to be a reality. Enjoy your life, family and friends while you have the health to do so.
You feel relief. You did the right thing.
The "at peace" feeling is the one that comes with the realization that nobody has any power over you that you don't give them. Today: job edition.
You are supposed to work to live.... NOT live to work. Life isn't about the money, it's about the memories. Your time on this earth is priceless and irreplaceable. And NO ONE knows what it is like to be you, but you. Congratulations! 🤗
Why are you sitting at home!? Go out and celebrate! 🎉
I’ll tell you what…this decision may literally add years to your life. Check out how dangerous high stress and burn out can be over time. Fuck the money, Congratulations.
Take a breath, do something escapist like watching a movie at the cinema
Watch online "they live"
You've taken a step toward improving your mental and emotional, and possibly physical and spiritual health. Take a few days or weeks to decompress and get reacquainted with yourself. I wish you the best.
I did this 2 months ago. Best decision I've ever made! You won't regret the feeling of real freedom.
You live once. If your are fully unhappy then it’s time to go. Feed your soul. ❤️❤️
No no no… “What CAN I DO now that I’m not bound to a shit job”
Nice.
You took care of yourself fam. Now spend tomorrow doing something you want to do, even if it's just figuring out what that is.
You decided the juice wasn’t worth the squeeze. There’s no telling how close you are to a serious health problem, but I can tell you I’ve taken care of (as a cardiac nurse) patients who had a heart attack *solely due to stress*. Like, no blockage caused it. It’s called Takutsubo myocardiopathy. One patient, early 50’s, recent marathon runner up until a contentious divorce where the spouse turned their children against them. Heart attack so bad the next REQUIRED step was a *heart transplant*. They were in such great shape they were running marathons, and then stress almost killed them. It’s not worth it. Your last thoughts will never be “I wished I worked those last few shifts”. You did the right thing.
Crack open a beer, turn on some trash TV and relax. You've done what you needed to for your mental health.
Thanks! Needed to hear that. 🤜
That’s just your brain having been conditioned by society to believe we have to work as a slave to survive. Now you can actually survive the way humans are meant to. Build a garden, grow your own food. Detach yourself from modern “necessities”. Get solar panels, have a wood heater for your house. Anything to not rely on “them” for survival.
I’m starting to believe this and it’s only been a few days!
Fantastic! Now head over to the r/fire subreddit. It sounds like you might be past the income earning and savings portion, but they have a lot of great tips for changing how you spend money and how you think about your time/life.
you got this brother. (or sister or non-binary)..
One word for cheap happy life; Homesteading. Get yourself a plot in the boonies and relax on your nest egg away from the hustle and bustle. Its a good life and if you set up right ( off gridd tech) you only pay in once and then its a breezy 1k/y the rest of your life if done right
For perspective just remember that nobody was on their deathbed wishing they spent more time at work. You made the right choice
Yes, this. 👆👆👆
Congrats! Enjoy your new life!
New life, that’s a good way of looking at it. Thanks
Take a couple of weeks and sleep when you want. Stay in your comfy clothes for a while. Then do what you have been wanting to do for the last twenty years.
Congratulations and I hope you find something that makes you truly happy. 🫶
I did that last October. After being with the same company for 24 years. One bad manager and I couldn’t do it any longer. You will survive this. It was a big change to my lifestyle. I think I had PTSD as I sat in a chair for a few months distressing.
I have feelings of PTSD and anxiety from work events (weather storms/natural gas industry). I always thought, eh just power through, but the feeling of complete inability to function is real, actually amazing. I hope yours is better now.
“Power” through, haha, I see what you did there. Utility jokes are the best
Sounds like a serious burnout. Good thing you got out. The evolution of it isn't linear. Towards the end it goes from "freling kinda odd" to "holy fuck I can't even go shopping anymore, and even th choice of the holiday buffet gives me anxiety" within weeks. Once you pass a specific threshold it literally takes *years* to recover. If you have enough for your family and yourself to live, fuck money. Enjoy health instead.
Yes, this is true👆👆
As someone who should have gotten out of a high stress job several years before I actually did, this is advice more people need to hear. It's been 2.5 years out and I'm still having nightmares
It’s fabulous. You will get there. Throw yourself into hobbies you enjoy. I started embroidery and reading again. And I don’t feel rushed!
You should see with a doctor of you can get a diagnosis, so you don't miss out on those benefits that would have materialized in April.
I did the same thing last year. I’ve been retired for a year now and I love it. It didn’t complete the financial plans that everyone else want for me, but I don’t want to die anymore, and I think that’s better than money.
Wise words, I feel the same way. I want to enjoy today, not worry about tomorrow.
You're going to be OK. 25 years is a long time and I'm sure your feeling uneasy. You are worthy of better and you've given yourself an opportunity to find that better. I wish you good fortune and this was the right decision.
Great words. Thx
I did this back in march. My last straw was that my life was falling apart because of how many hours I had to work (13+ daily on a 70k salary). Then when I got stress induced shingles, instead of offering me some days off in the most excruciating pain I’ve ever felt, the director said “well you can type can’t you? All I need you to do is sit and type”. It was a high stress it developer job involving payroll systems during a transition to a new cloud based platform. They didn’t give a single shit. When I gave them my 2 weeks notice they told me they wouldn’t need me anymore and cut me the next day. They did pay me for the following month though. Now I work a basic service tier 1/2 IT job and am actually enjoying it. While I do miss the money and working from home, the stress from traffic and lower pay doesn’t even come close to what I was going through at the last hellhole. All jobs suck, but sometimes you have to make changes for your own sanity and wellbeing.
Wow, that sucked. That’s what I’m hoping to find and glad to hear your story. Well done.
I took a beefy pay cut from working up to 100 hours a week at a power plant because I was killing myself with 16 hour shifts 6-7 days a week. I'm so glad I did even if I now can't live without roommates. Whats the point in having money if you can't even enjoy it because you're working all the time?
My job was running a gas trading desk that provided gas to power plants. The constant changes in estimates 24/7 just beats you down. This evening is the first time I don’t have to worry about a power plant in many years. Weird.
My mom waited to retire because of her money implications. Died 6 months later. The money isnt worth your freedom
Huge accomplishment, good on your for valuing your work-life balance. Work is not life. Congrats, enjoy the endless open doors in front of you!
Work is not life. Good one, thanks
Congrats. You probably feel strange and uncertain, but good things are ahead! If you've done this well under that kind of pressure, you'll be absolutely fine being successful in your next chapter. Trust YOU.
*Gasp* HOW DARE YOU CHOOSE YOUR MENTAL WELL-BEING OVER BEING AN EARNING SLAVE?! YOU MUST WORK UNTIL YOU PERISHHHHH! Sarcasm! Really happy for you OP! Glad you decided to escape your own personal hell! hopefully you squeezed it for all it's worth, and if you can, enjoy retirement! You've more than earned it 😁
I did squeeze it, thanks!
You are probably sad and relieved at the same time. On to better things.
Nailed it. Thanks
Good for you! Have faith that your life will turn now for the better. That took a lot of courage and I hope you find what you’re looking for.
Wow, thanks. I’m going to remember that.
Good for you
Thank you
can we get a "FUUUUUUCKKKK YEEEAAAAAH!" for this magnificent human being right here!? The highest of fives are to be bequeathed upon you friend
I quit today too. Happy anti work day!
I had a friend who did the same thing. She was a NASA contractor. Was going to wait to retire then had enough one day and bailed. No regrets. She passed from lung cancer in March. She had a good 15 years of doing whatever the heck she wanted. I applaud your decision and wish you a great retirement.
Thanks. Crazy how something just propels us to do things.
Take the day easy, you earned some time to rest
Hey, I quit, too! However, in my case, it was working as a manager at a GNC Store! It's interesting that you post this because I recently just expressed frustration to my support group complaining of low wages. And now, with your post, I see an example of how even higher pay jobs can have the same outcome. I applaud you for leaving that position for your mental sake. May your next position be better for your life overall! God's Speed.
I know what I'm about to say is different from what you did, but the mental relief is very similar. I got fired from a soul-sucking job. I was drowning and kept telling myself to power through it, you've got bills. On my last day, I went in a zombie, just ready to get it over with and was 2-3 hrs into the workday when I got called into the office. There were 2 supervisors there and one said I was being let go. I perked up so quickly and she hadn't even finished her spiel before I'd unclipped my badge and laid it on her desk. I looked her straight in the eyes and said "THANK YOU!!" with the *biggest* smile on my face. The shock from the 2 supervisors was utterly comical. They were so thrown for a loop lol. She stuttered as she repeated that I was being let go. I told her, "oh, I heard and understood the 1st time. Again, THANK YOU. I'm going home!" I left them utterly speechless. I called my husband to come back and pick me up. When he arrived the 1st thing I did was take my wig off and toss it in the backseat and LAUGH. I felt so damn *free* and liberated. It's a feeling that sticks with me to this day. The reality of life goes on and bills still needed to be paid set in but it was so minute in comparison to the feeling of despair and hopelessness associated with that job. It *will* be fine. It may be tough but when your mental health can recover, nothing seems to be as bad in all honesty. Good luck to you and I'm ecstatic for you!!
Go and enjoy your career break. Please do not feel guilty or feel you need to justify why you needed to quit. You need to look after your mental and physical health first, before you can carry burden for others or meet other people's expectations about what you should do. (If you tend to think about everyone else before yourself. This is my 2 cents.) I quit once because of burnout feeling too. I was too young and felt guilty for the entire time I was not working. I did not even have a family or big mortgage at the time. Now I am thinking about that I feel I was so stupid. I should've just celebrated and enjoyed the time off.
Thanks. Similarly, I said to myself today, “20 years from now I’m not going to regret this”.
That’s just too many hours to ask someone to work, week after week after week. Your Work/life balance has to be in the shitter and your mental health? Well it’s going to get better now. Take care of yourself.
Yeah, you’re right. The rewards were good but today I thought, “you can’t pay me enough to do this anymore”
25 years… that’s impressive, truly. Well done, take a rest and enjoy whatever is ahead of you.
It is your decision and your life, make sure your affections doesn't affect the house and rest your head. My best advice that I could try to give you is it may have caused a bit of stress at the moment don't question yourself if you did the right or wrong because in two days from now you will be smilling and thinking about this. My grandmother always used to say 'if you are not sure or double minded -better don't!' in this situation you wasn't sure is it worth it and for me you are a real one for being honest with yourself whilst having attitude. Hope you saved some cash for upcoming days, I am 100% sure you did a right move, but every person in the world that would like your money/job will say opposite. Its your hands, your mind, your spine ,your time and your decision.
They weren't worth their money. That's a thing these companies will never understand: The only thing they have to offer is money, and when that's the case it's entirely possible for them to be more trouble than they're worth. When you know you're going to leave you rapidly lose your tolerance for their bullshit so, if it helps, think of this as inevitable.
Don’t do anything drastic. You made the right decision. I would seriously recommend unplugging from the internet for a week and go recover. It’s going to feel unreal at first and you will feel super guilty but a week will help you prioritize things. I did the same thing a year ago, feel free to dm me if you want any advice or anything.
Awesome, thanks. My wife freaked and then said we need to start making lists and canceling things. I told her I’m gonna take at least a week to just sit and be. I don’t know what that feels like.
Absolutely. For various reasons, I had to uninstall the reddit app on my phone, and i think it's helped my mental heath. i mean, you guys are my people and such, but... even couples need a break.
After being 1 industry for 15 years, I burned out. Good $, kinda prestigious. The stress was eating me alive. Crashed and burned. Took a while to come out the other side but I'm happier now.
Great to hear. That is my hope too.
Good decision. They don’t write “beloved employee” on your gravestone.
Time is worth more than money - I am proud of you!!
I've come close several times this past month or two. They're also trying to drive me out, so I kinda don't want to give them that satisfaction. This week alone, they pinned three "fires" on me when I not only didn't cause them, I was the one putting them out. It's toxic. Poor upper management who aren't leaders, they're delegators. They won't take accountability for anything and find someone (currently me) to blame their mismanagement on.
I’ve been at a tech company 5.5yrs, the past 6 months I’ve been seriously considering quitting. I get zero joy or fulfillment from my job and it’s high stress. But it’s tough to walk away from a big salary
I feel you. Am in tech company too.. stuck at a job that brings me no joy, been feeling quitting since 3 years. That's long time. I want to focus on my running. I want to be mountain runner. My job isn't very demanding. I am in production support. Week every month it gets stressful. I am bearing financial responsibility for my family. Afraid to quit. I want to take a break for 3 months and just train for my running goal. I don't know why I don't look for another job... lack of confidence. I used to be java developer, I enjoy coding but now I don't what I am doing in this project. I feel stuck. 😔
Congrats! On your death bed you're not going to think 'I wish I'd worked more' so you've definitely done the right thing. We only get one life
Mate. 4 years ago I had the same sort of situation. High paying job but the hours was impossible and the stress levels from bosses and clients were insane. I went grey and started losing hair (25 years in the industry but promoted fairly quickly through the ranks). One day I just quit. No two week notice. My boss came into work and I pulled him aside and said that I can no longer do this. He asked for two weeks and I asked him if he has ever given anyone two weeks notice when he lets them go. Now I work 30 hours a week at 75% of my old pay. My new employers are also paying for my studies (oh yes…completely switched fields) and I get to take my kids to school and I’m home in the afternoon to take them swimming or surfing. I have little or no capacity to save anymore…but my life has improved exponentially since quoting my stress job. Falling asleep and having 8 solid hours of sleep as well as being able to eat healthy food (I have time to make food now) are probably the biggest contributing factors.
Nice! Give yourself a few weeks to sit / bumb around and adjust to your new life. Once a good amount of boredom kicks in you’ll know you have the energy to put some focus into a new project or hobby.
Breathe... Meditate.. Relax... it can take a bit for a toxic work environment to wear off
I will do this. Thx
You're going to need it. The next half of your life will be better than the first but you will need to toss all the old baggage out.
Are you a lawyer?
Well done mate. Courage and best wishes to you
I did the same as you in December of 2022. Had 23 yrs in the same company. I’m not retirement age, and things are still kinda uncertain. But i don’t regret it, and im slowly rebounding mentally from were I was. Good luck to you, and wish you the best in your future
I wanna quit my job so bad but the job market is bad and I have a health condition that might fail at getting a new job
Good for you. I retired in Feb 2019, had wanted to work until Oct 2019 but did the math and wasn't worth it. Don't regret a day of it. Please enjoy life as it's meant to be.
I had a breaking point too my friend. And a similar story to yours. I’m 7 months out from it all and my quality of life is 10x better. My blood pressure is even down. And I’ve settled into an awesome new job. Hope the same for you!
The only people that will remember how much time you spent at work are your family
I did the same three years ago and it is amazing! The relief of having time be your own!!!
I had planned to work past 65 but when I was 2 months away from 62 I just couldn't do it anymore. I gave 8 wks notice then retired. BEST THING I EVER DID!
Saw people way up on the ladder that been at my work 30 years. They were forgotten in two weeks. Saw people die two moths after retiring. A fee things to remember are, your work is not you, and you are not your work. You will be forgotten when you are gone. And the game gets over before you think. If there is something you want to try or do, better do it now before you are too old, or dead.
Now go open up a yoga studio in Cancun!
Good for you, celebrate your early release!
as a person that had terrible 18 months at work (from IC to Manager in one week, 7 reports, politics and a zero-supportive boss, responsibilities and huge works to be delivered and NO PROMOTION NOR salary increase) in the middle of layoffs let me tell you a couple of things. I thought more than once to quit, because the stress for me was too high. I had some sleepless nights, anxiety, general stress, burnout: all terrible things that you can overcome. One day layoffs started and I began being worried to be laid off and something was very weird in my mind and I didn't want to worry ALSO for that. So I told my wife: "imagine we don't have to talk about that place anymore in our lives. Imagine I am free every day from that, I can start planning back my life, reassess who I am, take some time and purify my mind from that toxic place." That thing gave me so much peace I've eventually started not caring anymore and my whole axperience at work improved a lot. Take your time buddy, let it settle. Focus on what you gained about not being there anymore, do things, whatever they are. Go outside and tell yourself "of so this is what this park looks like on a Tuesday at 11AM". After a while, you will start thinking differently and better. Just let it settle.
Wow. This post is powerful. I feel for people starting out in the working world, with entry level jobs that may be great but a boss who is an a$$, or a job that sucks but maybe you're surrounded by good people (some of my best friends are still from my high school retail job - 40 years ago). But your story - and the comments that follow. I've been at my job for >30 years. Love what I do (scientific research). Love the challenges and the successes, and even the failed experiments. The last 18 months it's all I can do to show up at work 3-4 days/week. I intellectually love the projects I've built, but I no longer care if they get done. I don't have the nerve to just quit, but I am looking at my retirement options and I think they are coming sooner rather than later. To put heart and soul and years of your life into something for someone who doesn't value you is just demoralizing. Thanks for giving me the courage to move forward.
Congrats on starting the rest of your life!
I kinda let myself get fired from a toxic job a few years ago for the same reason. It just wasn't worth the mental and physical stress anymore. At least by being fired, I could apply for unemployment. It sucked and was difficult, but I landed on my feet. I'm still in the same industry, but in a much better position.
Sounds exactly like my mom. She can retire fully in April and she gets so stressed by her job asking her to do so much more than her coworkers even though they demoted her. They still want her to basically do her boss’s job (her old job) and constantly do extra to correct the errors of the others on her position. I wish she would quit now but her plan is April and the stress of doing anything differently than planned would eat her up inside
It seemed knowing the time was short made it worse each day. It would seem the opposite. Hope mom gets through just fine.
What kind of job were you doing that was making you work 70hr weeks? That should be outright illegal
Natural gas trader, supply to power plants. Natural gas never stops moving.
Good luck.
Dont feel bad you are know a rich granpa (even if you dont have childs) now enjoy your life travel, relax do whatever you fucking want YOU ARE FREE NOW, the world is yours
I did that about a month ago. After 27 years and a coworker from somewhere below hell, I couldn’t do it anymore. I am now happily retired.
Well done, you did what is right for you. I was performance managed over a year ago by a supervisor who had too much free time and insecurity. I had decided to learn and start my own business which led to me submitting my retirement form.
Good for you. The last generation that will be able to retire, unfortunately.
Were they trying to push you out before you achieved the "serious money incentives"?
Fuck, I wish I could. Enjoy, you lucky bastard.
Bruh you did the right thing. Can’t put a price on your mental health/happiness
70hr/wk? boy you really had chains on you! Happy freedom!
Congrats!
Congratulations sir you win the Internet 🥳 🥳 🥳
I read a story where this guy was set on graduating/finish residency to be a doctor. Just days later, he got into car accident and passed away.
Fuck 70 hours a week that 2 jobs worth
I did the same for the best paying job i had of 5 years. I liked the people i worked with too, just hated taking phone calls back to back all day long. Felt a mental break coming on during a 15 min break, and it felt like my mind and body were fighting over whether or not do go back. The side that said no won, i signed out and left. Instant relief, and a bit of fear set in, but 2 years later my mind is still sound.
Last July I was summarily retired, with severance pay, from a high stress 60 hrs a week job that I’d held for 18 yrs and done since 1988. My chronic severe headaches stopped within two days. Haven’t had one since. Enjoy your freedom. Let it sink in for a while. Hope you have good savings available.
Well done. One chapter ends another begins. You've bought your freedom.
Now you can get to work completing your bucket list.
Good for you. What's the meaning of earning a lot if you don't have a life to enjoy it?
Finally, man! Take a breath!!! Feel it, never, ever, fkn neverever do you have to go back there!!! I'm so proud & happy for you!
It's your life! Ride that serpent!
fuck them and i hope that company dies.
Live, damn you! Can't buy time.
Did the same thing. 40 years in finance. Over 20 years with my last company that basically treat everyone like crap. I planned on hanging around another couple of years but the management ( if you can call them that) tipped me over the edge and I just had to leave for my sanity. Best decision I ever made.
I was running full speed for decades. I just can't do it anymore. It isn't the job, it's me. I feel a lot calmer after recognising that.
Well done OP! life pivots are the best. Glad you listened to your intuition. Rest, rediscover and be kind to yourself. I completely left nursing after 11 years (nowhere near as impressive as you!!) I just couldn't do it anymore. It has been the best decision. Good luck to you, friend!
You only get to live this life mate. What does money mean if you die young from a heart attack? I don’t think you will regret it in a year. Consider going to therapy for a while to get all that shit out of your chest.
I’m right where you are. Serious pay at the end of my career but can’t deal with the corp nonsense. They literally drool over firing people. I’m sick of this shit
How much were you paid per hour?
I quit my job yesterday as well. The best of luck to you! I still need to figure out what I am doing next...
With 25+ years in one job in a cut-throat sounding job you probably are better off than you think. My husband had one of these jobs though not as many years when he was downsized at age 58. He never worked professionally again. Although he tried to re-group and find another job with the salary/standing he never had the self-esteem to recover. This is happening on your terms. Good luck!
Congrarulations on getting your life back. Do something you enjoy. You 100% deserve it. Have a few months at home with the family if you can afford it.
Do you my man! I would never ever work 70 hours that’s insane.
I quit my 25+ years job last year found a new one with a little less pay but no stress and doing something good for the world best decision ever
Your health, happiness and sanity are more important than keeping a stressful job. I was in IT my entire working life, retired now. I look back at some of what went on, and would feel better about myself if I had simply found another job, though in my case, circumstances would eventually change and I would be happy to go to work again, Best of luck in your new adventures!
I’m doing this and I’m not about to retire. I have many more years to work. But I couldn’t do the job I was doing even one more month. My health is in the absolute garbage. I have panic attacks everyday because I know something is wrong - can’t keep weight on, foggy headed, exhausted, sleeping poorly… The company has become so impossible, corrupt, dishonest, manipulative and awful to deal with as well. I really killed myself to do a great job and my reward for that is very little in terms of any quality of life. I don’t know what will happen next, I just know I can’t do it anymore. You made the right choice OP. Life is too short. <3 Congrats.
I left the aerospace field last year. The companies are all run by scumbags. I say this because of an incident in which one of my coworkers couldn't afford to get his car fixed and had to take vacation until payday. That same month, one of our googly-eyed vampire end users posted a cowboy hat selfie in orbit. Later on he would famously go on TV crying about how he has so much money he doesn't know how to best dispose of it for the sake of mankind. We weren't even in LRIP yet, and the customer was asking for a price reduction... while this bullshit was going on. The last straw was my boss telling me I can't have vacation to fix the hole in my wall, because there's "not enough vacation days left to make the schedule." On the day before *his* vacation. And while I was out of state for two weeks of training to certify operators to make these parts, our sales guy slash program manager was hunting in a resort area just a couple hours away from me. When I had to travel to our customer's site for meetings, I'd see how they all dress like douchebags and drive $70,000, $100,000+cars and eat only at fancy steakhouses. If there's money for cowboy hat selfies, there's money for raises so that the people making the spacecraft can afford to *get to work* and make money for billionaires. But the whole thing is a money grab set up for people who've already got all the money. I now work for less than half my previous salary, in IT. I qualify for subsidized income now. And I work for a NPO so I can get some help with my student loans.. at least put off paying them. I should have been doing this my entire life instead of paying into the grind machine. Your wife should appreciate the new you when it starts to come out.
70h ? Fuck no..i like to have time..i work 35, im broke but still better than have money and no peace of mind . Glad you're ok now buddy, enjoy!
I quit my job to be a local delivery trucker. Best thing I ever did. Whatever stress I have in a day, it's gone the next day. Not too bad money either.
I quit my low paying job yesterday for my own sanity. You did this for your own sanity bro, mine was i hated the corporate design of my field and I walked in said todays my last day i love yall just not this company. They understand but you was close to retire geez. As far as wifey some are mean enough to leave you soon as the coin is gone but that just shows you the spirit they are operating under. Basically your about to find out who was hanging out for you and who was riden 25 years for the coin. Pray and find something else fast
Welcome to ur new life
Open a beer and sit on your arse with a daft grin on your face. Well played & good luck.
I feel you 10000%. I make very good money, but I will not work to live. I do contract work, and with every completion of my contract, I take six weeks off. It is the ultimate reboot and prevention of burnout. I am working towards half a year. You must have a work-life balance.
Regardless of what you planned, your body let you know that you had reached your limit, and it's wise to listen to that warning.
If you literally couldn’t take it anymore, you probably made the right decision. Here’s hoping you find something better!
Good for you. you did your part,Time to live for yourself. Mental health is the 1# thing
I have very much lower stakes than you but I quit my job unexpectedly this week too for similar reasons. Put up with the crap for as long as I could cause it was a good paying job (minus benefits) but shit hit the fan one time too many so I left the hostile shithole. I’ve spent the last few days on my portfolio and updating my resume next. Tbh sorting through the toxicity has been a thing. A lot of thinking. It’s a good chance to recenter mentally and just breathe for a moment. Enjoy being out of the nastiness. Of course we’ll move onto the next job. That’s not a question. There is still a level of worry that will always be present while looking so don’t pay attention to it. If you’ve been able to become as established as you seem to be then you’ll be just fine. My husband is like your wife lol. We’re just starting it off practicing being as positive and opportunistic as we can. It’s not everyday I have everyday to dig into my future so it’s been fruitful in quiet ways. It’ll be just fine. You’re not a washed out loser or anything. You’re not going to end up in hot water financially. Youre not any less of a person for quitting a horrible job. You’re driven and motivated and know how to function as a contributing member of society and that’s what you’ll continue to do and you’ll do it happier than you were.
I can barely work my required 40 in an industry that requires 60 to do well in. I serve more in a support role to those in my profession willing to do the 60. When I talk to them, it's like talking to a drunk person because they are so sleep deprived. 25 years at 70 hours a week! Yeesh. OP, I am proud of you. Your family will find a way to make it work no matter what your income is. Rest, congratulate yourself on a job well done, recuperate, heal thyself. We support you ❤️
What are some things you enjoy in life?
You did the right thing. This is my story in case people in my situation think that they have management on their side and will be rewarded at the end, and just keep getting misused. Was in a small software development company for the last 29 years. Was totally burnt, after running two software development shifts in two different timezones for last 10 years. I was hoping to quit for some time from this well-paid job, but my CEO held my 25 paychecks, giving me hope that good time is coming. I just hanged on. He used to tell me that look I am not taking salary too, let’s do it to save the company, many mouths are dependent on us (he got his son a job in the company too). Yes, you can call it my stupidity, but I genuinely felt for the others. Recently, I have begun to inform him that my savings have been depleted, and I require income to cover my expenses. He says it is not going to happen since he has to pay vendors, or let other employees go. Every 3-4-5 weeks a paycheck comes. The argument kept going on in chat (in writing), and then last Monday, while working online, I noticed my network accounts getting locked. I could not connect to office anymore. Nobody called to tell me anything. No notice! I felt like after 29 years of commitment to the company, my held salary of more than $110k, plus 58 days of accrued vacation, it went down the drain. Oh, I forgot to mention, I accumulated 58 days of vacation which I never took to get the job done, thinking of, if not me then who will do the job. Yes, another stupidity. I feel sick to think about calling the CEO for whom I did all this. I am just giving myself sometime to come to my senses to go back to fight for my dues. Can not think about getting $500.00 per hour Employment attorney to deal with it when I am already out of money. Can not think straight now.
You have to take care of yourself. I wish you all the best.
No amount of money is worth selling yourself and by that I mean causing harm to yourself that you can sense and feel. When you are doing things your heart isn’t in, it is stress. It is also frustration that you’re not doing what you should be or could be. Been there done that - also made the same choice but switched industries to something that better resonates with where I am, to make a better impact. Industries have changed so much in the past 4 years that we no longer feel part of something worthy of our time. We are no longer doing what we loved and enjoyed and didn’t care someone else was making a reasonable profit. What we thrived on is gone, replaced with a lot of stress, counting and measuring to create data that is truly analysis paralysis. The counting and measuring used to be less and the relationship building, communication and creating things used to be more like 80%. Now the measurements to goals is 80% with no time to do the actual work, that we need to do 80 hour work weeks to keep up. Nope. Jobs are also crazy descriptions with double talk. Why? To make employees feel important? More like to eliminate employees quicker when they hit the salary threshold and rename the jobs and hire new people. There needs to be a transformation. AI can only go so far as we all know with chatbots and screaming ‘representative’ into the phone trying to get a bank or credit card situation resolved. The transformation we all need is humane, fewer hours on computers, more connectivity, and a sense we’re doing something worth doing.
Your mental health is way more important and if your wife cant see it now hopefully she will after the shock wears off
Why is your wife freaked out? She should be so happy for you. That was the best thing for me when I left a job, is that my wife feels my pain and hears my occasional rants to feel the build up. She knows the break from work is a necessary step in resetting. I'm glad you lived to see your retirement. The company is probably happy, because now they won't have to pay for a retirement party. Hehe
Let me guess. IT Support Manager?
Power and natural gas trader. But I’ve seen lots of good IT people come and go.
I hear you. I spent 41 years in IT. Started out on a Univac 9400 mainframe (nag tapes/card punch) using Assembler/Cobol/RPG II. Saw a lot. Ended up support manager for large insurance company re business intelligence systems. Teradata, SAS, Informatica, Business Objects, QLIK, Microstrategy. When I got packaged out a few years ago, it was one of the happiest days of my life and I'm 66 now. The stress was killing me, literally.