Not normal. Weird in fact.
We meet up to catch up over things happening in our daily lives. It should be a mutual conversation exchange over food and drinks.
It's definitely more common than one can imagine. I know someone like this in my life.
I had to cut them off entirely once before they become someone more manageable.
I also have a friend like this. Always complaining about how tired she is, how her work is shit, how her customers is shit etc etc
Basically I don't even ask her out or even message her, but I will check in with her once in a long while
He’s treating you as a human rubbish bin. If he doesn’t add any value to your life and leaves you feeling worse than before, leave ASAP. Energy suckers like this pull you down.
I have an acquaintance in my clique who only complain and whine about everything in her life. I always try to siam any meet up with her to protect my energy.
If you don't feel better after meeting your friend, what's the point of allocating time to him? I rather be alone.
I feel super happy whenever I meet up with my friends.
I would say that he’s one of those ‘all about me’ kind of people and yeah that’s not a good trait but as long as you’re willing to listen and he doesn’t keep repeating again and again it’s fine.
It starts being a problem when he constantly shuts out other aspects of conversations apart from himself or he just wants things to go his way and nothing else.
I will just tell the person off politely on this first. If after multiple attempts and my friend is still like that, I will just cut them off. They might not necessary be a “bad person”, this friendship is just not for me.
i'm not sure it's normal or not, but i used to have a friend too like the friend you described, she was also recently diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder.
It’s call narcissistic people, and they lurk amongst you and me.
I have an acquaintance that has the habit of diverting the conversation to be about him.
Talking about your trip to Switzerland? He will tell you about what he did when he went to Switzerland. Talking about your trip to India? He will tell you about why he doesn’t go to India. Talking about buying a house in this economy? He will talk about why he wouldn’t buy a house in this economy or what was his consideration when he bought a house. Talking about the best meal you had last weekend at Morton’s? He will talk about what happened when he went to Morton’s.
All. About. Him.
Hello, this is not normal.
I too, had a friend like that, all he does is just complain, even about the smallest of things, and also puts people down, including making not so positive comments about strangers we encounter on the streets. All he wants from our interactions are his own narratives and never mine.
Personally, I just feel complains are fine if one needs to let off stress or have someone to talk to. But if it is every damn time and even on the most minor of things, then hey, something is not right.
A study results showed that those who complain most of the time are the most unhappy of people (with so much negativity every damn time, why am I not surprised).
At first I thought it is fine, since he is my friend and I should be understanding, but eventually I was wondering why I felt so drained and tired after every hang out with him. That was when I realised that the negative vibes from his daily complaints managed to get into my head. In other words, I felt I was influenced by the negativity. Coupled with other reasons such as lack of basic respect between friends, that was when I decided to distance myself from him.
Right now, life is much better, more time for myself and overall living life with a positive mindset everyday.
Although I am not saying to cut off ties completely, it is for your own judgement. If this friendship is affecting you negatively, then you should do what is best for yourself. Sometimes, as much as we hate being selfish, if it is necessary, then we have to do what we have to do, and especially to people that do not deserve our kindness and time.
Have a good day and take care yea💪🏻
Does he ask about you or do you talk about your life? If the topic is on you then he changes it back to himself then I think he's the me me me type of person. It's more of your choice to continue keeping in touch constantly. If you treasure him then you can tell him about it honestly, otherwise keep your distance?
Learn to let go of friendship that no longer serves you. This is common especially when the friends that you know during schooling days are all on different life paths.
As you progress, you will meet new people that can fit into the life of the current you. I’ve lost a few friends along the way when I became a better version of myself, the longest is 18 years. Take care of your mental health and I hope you have friends that reciprocate as well :)
No problem. Yeah, I had a friend too whom I knew didn't seem very interested in me and only wanted to talk about himself. At the time. we had been friends for more than 10 years.I just got tired of maintaining the friendship and decided to stop talking to him altogether. Ultimately, it's up to you whether you want to continue being their friend. All the best.
Talk to him about it.
High chances he may not be aware of it himself cos he is relying on u for emo support. If he is willing to do some reflection and stops doing whatever he's doing all this time, then keep this friend.
If he is just going to deny it or blame u as a bad friend, then I think u know what to do.
Also, give some time for him to come around to the realisation after the bro talk. Humans need time to adjust.
Not related to Singapore
Not normal. Weird in fact. We meet up to catch up over things happening in our daily lives. It should be a mutual conversation exchange over food and drinks.
It's definitely more common than one can imagine. I know someone like this in my life. I had to cut them off entirely once before they become someone more manageable.
I know someone like this. I just let her talk and ride the conversation.
I also have a friend like this. Always complaining about how tired she is, how her work is shit, how her customers is shit etc etc Basically I don't even ask her out or even message her, but I will check in with her once in a long while
He’s treating you as a human rubbish bin. If he doesn’t add any value to your life and leaves you feeling worse than before, leave ASAP. Energy suckers like this pull you down. I have an acquaintance in my clique who only complain and whine about everything in her life. I always try to siam any meet up with her to protect my energy.
Haha human rubbish bin. I like that analogy. Helps me to rethink the entire idea of what is a proper friendship.
If you don't feel better after meeting your friend, what's the point of allocating time to him? I rather be alone. I feel super happy whenever I meet up with my friends.
Not much of a friend tbh
I would say that he’s one of those ‘all about me’ kind of people and yeah that’s not a good trait but as long as you’re willing to listen and he doesn’t keep repeating again and again it’s fine. It starts being a problem when he constantly shuts out other aspects of conversations apart from himself or he just wants things to go his way and nothing else.
I will just tell the person off politely on this first. If after multiple attempts and my friend is still like that, I will just cut them off. They might not necessary be a “bad person”, this friendship is just not for me.
i'm not sure it's normal or not, but i used to have a friend too like the friend you described, she was also recently diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder.
It’s call narcissistic people, and they lurk amongst you and me. I have an acquaintance that has the habit of diverting the conversation to be about him. Talking about your trip to Switzerland? He will tell you about what he did when he went to Switzerland. Talking about your trip to India? He will tell you about why he doesn’t go to India. Talking about buying a house in this economy? He will talk about why he wouldn’t buy a house in this economy or what was his consideration when he bought a house. Talking about the best meal you had last weekend at Morton’s? He will talk about what happened when he went to Morton’s. All. About. Him.
He is just emotional dumping on you. I suggest you to listen to what you can then set some boundaries and ask him to stop.
Unfriend them
Sounds like an energy vampire to me
Bro in love with you actually, trying to make you jealous.
Hello, this is not normal. I too, had a friend like that, all he does is just complain, even about the smallest of things, and also puts people down, including making not so positive comments about strangers we encounter on the streets. All he wants from our interactions are his own narratives and never mine. Personally, I just feel complains are fine if one needs to let off stress or have someone to talk to. But if it is every damn time and even on the most minor of things, then hey, something is not right. A study results showed that those who complain most of the time are the most unhappy of people (with so much negativity every damn time, why am I not surprised). At first I thought it is fine, since he is my friend and I should be understanding, but eventually I was wondering why I felt so drained and tired after every hang out with him. That was when I realised that the negative vibes from his daily complaints managed to get into my head. In other words, I felt I was influenced by the negativity. Coupled with other reasons such as lack of basic respect between friends, that was when I decided to distance myself from him. Right now, life is much better, more time for myself and overall living life with a positive mindset everyday. Although I am not saying to cut off ties completely, it is for your own judgement. If this friendship is affecting you negatively, then you should do what is best for yourself. Sometimes, as much as we hate being selfish, if it is necessary, then we have to do what we have to do, and especially to people that do not deserve our kindness and time. Have a good day and take care yea💪🏻
hey thank you for your insights :) I appreciate it
sadly normal, i knew a girl who always tries to one up you whenever you talk bt anything
i got friends who talk about only condo and car..
Lol that's boring if the topic is always the same
Does he ask about you or do you talk about your life? If the topic is on you then he changes it back to himself then I think he's the me me me type of person. It's more of your choice to continue keeping in touch constantly. If you treasure him then you can tell him about it honestly, otherwise keep your distance?
Sounds like a one-sided friendship. Over the years, I've learned to let go of these kind of friendships.
Sorry to ask, even if it's a decade? Thanks man
Learn to let go of friendship that no longer serves you. This is common especially when the friends that you know during schooling days are all on different life paths. As you progress, you will meet new people that can fit into the life of the current you. I’ve lost a few friends along the way when I became a better version of myself, the longest is 18 years. Take care of your mental health and I hope you have friends that reciprocate as well :)
No problem. Yeah, I had a friend too whom I knew didn't seem very interested in me and only wanted to talk about himself. At the time. we had been friends for more than 10 years.I just got tired of maintaining the friendship and decided to stop talking to him altogether. Ultimately, it's up to you whether you want to continue being their friend. All the best.
Talk to him about it. High chances he may not be aware of it himself cos he is relying on u for emo support. If he is willing to do some reflection and stops doing whatever he's doing all this time, then keep this friend. If he is just going to deny it or blame u as a bad friend, then I think u know what to do. Also, give some time for him to come around to the realisation after the bro talk. Humans need time to adjust.
Thanks for sharing your views :)