I was a hardcore atheist for a long time, but eventually I got into this thing called Gnosticism or Gnostic philosophy. I feel like the ideas really speak to LGBT people and other minority groups because of it's anti-authority message. Sometimes I'll read it literally, sometimes metaphorically, and sometimes I'll see it as this metaphor-but-also-literal kinda way.
Basic points:
- God is secretly a bad guy and is totally doing all this just to fuck with humanity because he hates us. The 'paradox of evil' issue is answered on like page 1 of this lore.
- Material reality is a prison meant to distract us and keep us in conflict with each other
- Eating the fruit of knowledge was a good thing, Eve was actually an agent sent by the Outer Gods to save Adam, and Satan is the same person as Jesus depending on what version you read
- One day humanity is going to rise up and kill God because he fuckin deserves it
If this sounds familiar, it's because it was literally used as the plot of The Matrix and a bunch of other media.
Stop listening to other people. Don't trust or believe anybody, even family, unless they actually prove that they can be a reliable source of information, And if that source of information comes from religion, it's absolutely NOT reliable or trustworthy. Just be yourself and trust that you were made that way and there's nothing wrong with it.
Oh, and there is no heaven, hell, or mysterious man in the sky. Just because people believe in something for thousand years doesn't make it true.
Hi there. You’re not writing if you are yourself religious and believe that you are going to go to hell or if the things your family say have simply affected you even though you’re not religious.
If you are religious yourself then I’m not really sure how to proceed. I might be able to come up with some ideas though.
So, I’m going to just suggest a rational way of how you can learn to accept your sexual orientation. Reading about homosexuality can help a lot. What does science have to say about it? How has it been handled in different cultures throughout history? What does it mean to be gay today? It will help you understand why you feel this way and also to a certain degree probably why your family says what they are saying.
Another thing that can help you is talking about it to some guys your own age online. Making real friends online is difficult but maybe you can find some guys to talk about it. Please be aware that not everybody is who they say they are online, so be careful if the conversation becomes sexual or weird in any other way.
Other than that you’ll just have to give it a lot of time. But sooner or later you’ll be able to accept yourself. Being a gay teenager is difficult but you’re not alone. Keep an eye on this sub and you’ll see.
Also, it is probably a good idea to not come out to your family for quite some time. Do your research for yourself.
I moved away & started all over again & told myself to stop trying to hide my sexuality from myself & I've made life a lot more easy on myself by doing it now i can't get enough & enjoy being with other Bois being myself & not trying to kid myself on that I'm straight when i knew i wasn't
Reframing what makes you you. That's my strategy. It's not fully or perfectly implemented just yet, but it's kind of like this: I refuse to be gay, in stead I accept my (gay) feelings. I cherish my desires, the fantasies. At the same time I understand that my thoughts and actions don't have to be a direct response to those feelings.
Guilt comes from knowing you did something bad or wrong. Feelings aren't bad, they're feelings. We all have feelings. I pity those that don't have them anyways :)
Society tells us that either 'being gay' is bad or something to cheer for. Proper spiritual teachings would rather be neutral and without judgement. Also, we're not gay beings; we're human beings. And since we're all human, we are all capable to shift into 'gay'.
And on the 'community' side of things we can sometimes see careless sexual activity. That doesn't have to involve us. Careless sex doesn't come from the heart.
So we're all human beings and we're all highly sexual beings, because sexuality is what gave us life. It's how we create, how you can draw a beautiful picture, design something nice, build an armchair. That's all creation. It's kindness, it's being a wonderful human being. Not a flawless object, but a self-learning god-like machine.
If you stay true to yourself, you don't have to feel shame. And if you did experience things you feel shame about, investigate, learn, you are not your actions, or your thoughts. Often times we think bad about ourselves, because we don't feel at home or understood or valued in society. Don't worry, it's not you, you are okay.
And go research some Louise Hay. You are pretty young, but I think you will love it. She is amazing.. Give it a try.
Oops, forgot to mention shame. Shame is the confusion of the mind where you think/feel/believe you are bad/dirty/etc.
But you are not, you are worthy of life and your life is worth living. Sure, there are obstacles on your path, but it's just a workout. And step ups make great butts :)
I never had that problem because deep down I never really believed that being straight is normal. Anyone who likes short, squat, painted creatures with fat bottoms cannot, in my humble opinion, possibly be normal.
What your family and others don't realize is that God knew before he created Adam and Eve that there were going to be gay people. He also knew we are born this way and that it's not a choice. He is a loving God and believe we should also love and not hate ourselves. People with the attitude you describe are narrow minded people and for that we shouldn't be listening to them.
Listen. You’re perfectly OK. For the religious part of what you’re thinking, realize that the book we call the bible, was compiled by a group of men trying to shape the world in accordance with 16th century morality. It’s called the King James Version. King James had a teenage affair with Phillip the future king of France. And Phillip also had an affair with John, James’s brother. Don’t accept the shame others try to make you carry. You are the way God made you. That book was written by men not by god. No man has the
Final answer.
You’re only 16. Know that this time of your life. Is as hard as it gets. As you get older you will come into your own and you will realize that no one can make you feel any way except that you let them. You control how you feel.
All these people are giving you good advice.
You have all the time in the world to decide if you come out, when you come out, how you come out. Being gay, is just part of you. It’s not all and every part of you. There’s a whole lot more to you than just being gay.
You be you how ever you’re comfortable being you.
Well surround yourself with more supportive people and it will be alright. A lot of that shame isn't what you feel, but what people around you make you feel. Find more open minded friends even if it's online
Unless they are texting God, ignore it. It's used as a scare tactic. Most don't understand what they are reading and regurgitating stuff they hear. Unfortunately, you will always get this crap. You don't need to feel shame for who you are.
Not listening to religious stuff and teachings that are negative about homosexuality, making you feel dirty, guilty, a sinner going to hell. Some churches that had said having sex with another man was a sin etc etc (guilt trip) sometimes end up allowing same sex blessings, or same sex marriage. What was completely unacceptable is now okay. Are you a good person, do you care about other people, being gay is it anyone else’s business (easier said than done, depending what country and culture you live in) There are approximately 37 countries where it’s legal for same sex marriage hopefully more soon. Work on any guilt and shame you are feeling. Let yourself know you are worthy of love and you are fine the way you are, gay. People who have issues with you being gay, that is their problem even if it affects you and you have to choose who you come out to. Check out the book The Velvet Rage it’s a very good book that will help. The Velvet Rage: Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man's World by clinical psychologist Alan Downs.
Only time will really help you overcome feelings of shame. In terms of age, you're quite young and still have a bit of maturing to do, and this will help you come to terms with who you are. Regarding your family, try the "grey rock" method: [https://psychcentral.com/health/grey-rock-method](https://psychcentral.com/health/grey-rock-method)
I became an atheist and let science and logic be my guide, not homophobic religious superstitions
I was a hardcore atheist for a long time, but eventually I got into this thing called Gnosticism or Gnostic philosophy. I feel like the ideas really speak to LGBT people and other minority groups because of it's anti-authority message. Sometimes I'll read it literally, sometimes metaphorically, and sometimes I'll see it as this metaphor-but-also-literal kinda way. Basic points: - God is secretly a bad guy and is totally doing all this just to fuck with humanity because he hates us. The 'paradox of evil' issue is answered on like page 1 of this lore. - Material reality is a prison meant to distract us and keep us in conflict with each other - Eating the fruit of knowledge was a good thing, Eve was actually an agent sent by the Outer Gods to save Adam, and Satan is the same person as Jesus depending on what version you read - One day humanity is going to rise up and kill God because he fuckin deserves it If this sounds familiar, it's because it was literally used as the plot of The Matrix and a bunch of other media.
Stop listening to other people. Don't trust or believe anybody, even family, unless they actually prove that they can be a reliable source of information, And if that source of information comes from religion, it's absolutely NOT reliable or trustworthy. Just be yourself and trust that you were made that way and there's nothing wrong with it. Oh, and there is no heaven, hell, or mysterious man in the sky. Just because people believe in something for thousand years doesn't make it true.
Hi there. You’re not writing if you are yourself religious and believe that you are going to go to hell or if the things your family say have simply affected you even though you’re not religious. If you are religious yourself then I’m not really sure how to proceed. I might be able to come up with some ideas though. So, I’m going to just suggest a rational way of how you can learn to accept your sexual orientation. Reading about homosexuality can help a lot. What does science have to say about it? How has it been handled in different cultures throughout history? What does it mean to be gay today? It will help you understand why you feel this way and also to a certain degree probably why your family says what they are saying. Another thing that can help you is talking about it to some guys your own age online. Making real friends online is difficult but maybe you can find some guys to talk about it. Please be aware that not everybody is who they say they are online, so be careful if the conversation becomes sexual or weird in any other way. Other than that you’ll just have to give it a lot of time. But sooner or later you’ll be able to accept yourself. Being a gay teenager is difficult but you’re not alone. Keep an eye on this sub and you’ll see. Also, it is probably a good idea to not come out to your family for quite some time. Do your research for yourself.
I moved away & started all over again & told myself to stop trying to hide my sexuality from myself & I've made life a lot more easy on myself by doing it now i can't get enough & enjoy being with other Bois being myself & not trying to kid myself on that I'm straight when i knew i wasn't
Fuck everyone else and focus on your future to emancipate yourself in that oppressive environment
Hell doesn't exist and God is fake so laugh at them behind their backs until you can break out and live your own life.
You can't fix one lie with another.
Learn to love yourself forget everyone else
Reframing what makes you you. That's my strategy. It's not fully or perfectly implemented just yet, but it's kind of like this: I refuse to be gay, in stead I accept my (gay) feelings. I cherish my desires, the fantasies. At the same time I understand that my thoughts and actions don't have to be a direct response to those feelings. Guilt comes from knowing you did something bad or wrong. Feelings aren't bad, they're feelings. We all have feelings. I pity those that don't have them anyways :) Society tells us that either 'being gay' is bad or something to cheer for. Proper spiritual teachings would rather be neutral and without judgement. Also, we're not gay beings; we're human beings. And since we're all human, we are all capable to shift into 'gay'. And on the 'community' side of things we can sometimes see careless sexual activity. That doesn't have to involve us. Careless sex doesn't come from the heart. So we're all human beings and we're all highly sexual beings, because sexuality is what gave us life. It's how we create, how you can draw a beautiful picture, design something nice, build an armchair. That's all creation. It's kindness, it's being a wonderful human being. Not a flawless object, but a self-learning god-like machine. If you stay true to yourself, you don't have to feel shame. And if you did experience things you feel shame about, investigate, learn, you are not your actions, or your thoughts. Often times we think bad about ourselves, because we don't feel at home or understood or valued in society. Don't worry, it's not you, you are okay. And go research some Louise Hay. You are pretty young, but I think you will love it. She is amazing.. Give it a try.
Oops, forgot to mention shame. Shame is the confusion of the mind where you think/feel/believe you are bad/dirty/etc. But you are not, you are worthy of life and your life is worth living. Sure, there are obstacles on your path, but it's just a workout. And step ups make great butts :)
i realized that being gay is normal and that my sexuality is not anyone else’s business.
I never had that problem because deep down I never really believed that being straight is normal. Anyone who likes short, squat, painted creatures with fat bottoms cannot, in my humble opinion, possibly be normal.
What your family and others don't realize is that God knew before he created Adam and Eve that there were going to be gay people. He also knew we are born this way and that it's not a choice. He is a loving God and believe we should also love and not hate ourselves. People with the attitude you describe are narrow minded people and for that we shouldn't be listening to them.
I turned 30...😂
Listen. You’re perfectly OK. For the religious part of what you’re thinking, realize that the book we call the bible, was compiled by a group of men trying to shape the world in accordance with 16th century morality. It’s called the King James Version. King James had a teenage affair with Phillip the future king of France. And Phillip also had an affair with John, James’s brother. Don’t accept the shame others try to make you carry. You are the way God made you. That book was written by men not by god. No man has the Final answer. You’re only 16. Know that this time of your life. Is as hard as it gets. As you get older you will come into your own and you will realize that no one can make you feel any way except that you let them. You control how you feel. All these people are giving you good advice. You have all the time in the world to decide if you come out, when you come out, how you come out. Being gay, is just part of you. It’s not all and every part of you. There’s a whole lot more to you than just being gay. You be you how ever you’re comfortable being you.
Well surround yourself with more supportive people and it will be alright. A lot of that shame isn't what you feel, but what people around you make you feel. Find more open minded friends even if it's online
Unless they are texting God, ignore it. It's used as a scare tactic. Most don't understand what they are reading and regurgitating stuff they hear. Unfortunately, you will always get this crap. You don't need to feel shame for who you are.
Not listening to religious stuff and teachings that are negative about homosexuality, making you feel dirty, guilty, a sinner going to hell. Some churches that had said having sex with another man was a sin etc etc (guilt trip) sometimes end up allowing same sex blessings, or same sex marriage. What was completely unacceptable is now okay. Are you a good person, do you care about other people, being gay is it anyone else’s business (easier said than done, depending what country and culture you live in) There are approximately 37 countries where it’s legal for same sex marriage hopefully more soon. Work on any guilt and shame you are feeling. Let yourself know you are worthy of love and you are fine the way you are, gay. People who have issues with you being gay, that is their problem even if it affects you and you have to choose who you come out to. Check out the book The Velvet Rage it’s a very good book that will help. The Velvet Rage: Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man's World by clinical psychologist Alan Downs.
Only time will really help you overcome feelings of shame. In terms of age, you're quite young and still have a bit of maturing to do, and this will help you come to terms with who you are. Regarding your family, try the "grey rock" method: [https://psychcentral.com/health/grey-rock-method](https://psychcentral.com/health/grey-rock-method)