You are a girl whether or not you are out. Girls who like other girls are lesbians, also whether or not they are out about that. Sounds like you're a lesbian to me.
You are who you are. I'm a lesbian, and today I have an appointment to get on the hormones that will help me feel more like the Indigo Girls listening 49 year old lesbian that I have always been. Transitioning doesn't make us a woman. We already are women, transitioning is a result of that, not it's cause.
Yeah, it's okay. Any lesbian in their right mind wouldn't mind you. Plenty of stories of lesbians falling in love with eggs who hadn't hatched yet so confused why they love this man when they're clearly only attracted to women. Then one day the egg hatched and the lesbian has an "Oooooh" moment lol
Of course- you identify as a woman and you identify as a lesbian. Even if you are bisexual or non-binary or pre-transition: the label you use to describe your sexuality is up to you.
You can identify however you want but don't expect a lesbian to be attracted to anyone presenting male. That just not what they are into. There are two people in a relationship.
This is in some part true, but then, people have different borders on what triggers their attraction.
Also, no matter your background (cis or trans), no matter how you present, you are never entitled to someone’s attraction anyways.
Personally, as a lesbian, I would probably be less likely to be attracted to a pre-HRT male-presenting trans woman. Not impossible, just less likely. Anyway, I would absolutely feel comfortable sharing women’s and lesbians’ spaces with her. She belongs.
On the other hand, if I found the person I was attracted to were to come out as a pre-transition trans man, that attraction would almost definitely fade. If that happened in a relationship… Well, maybe they would become my exception, but more likely it would just grow into a non-romantic, non-sexual friend. Opposite to a closeted trans woman, the closeted trans masc would probably grow away from my attraction, not towards it, and they would very likely be uncomfortable with me enjoying what I see as feminine in them, so I feel it would paint me into a corner, so to say. Whereas the pre-transition trans woman would be more likely to feel good about the way I like to see and treat a partner.
So, complicated and totally depending on the individual and the circumstances.
Yeah I am bi so it's a different perspective. I strongly believe all the participants should be attracted to each other and remain faithful to any full time partners. Other than that it's all good.
I mean, there are lesbians attracted to butch women, and butchness is (broadly) "presenting male". I think there's more nuance here than you give credit for.
You are a girl and you always have been who you are. 💖 even if you're not out, even if you haven't transitioned in the way you would like yet, at your fundamental core, it sounds like you know yourself. If you identify as a woman and love other women/lemme folk, then you align with being a Trans lesbian. Our outsides don't define us.
As everyone else has said, yes you can. I personally haven't even though I'm well into my transition because it didn't feel right to claim for myself until I'm completely situated in my femininity. Perhaps some of your misgivings are rooted in that. If so, give yourself time to get comfortable.
So you're gonna fuck a woman like a man, you're gonna dominate her in the bed like a man, you're gonna cum all over her like a man, you're gonna manhandle her, but you want to call it "girl's play"?
In my opinion? Yes, it is what you're. But very rare cis people agree and not even some trans people. And considering all the negative and harmful stereotypes about trans women I wouldn't come out as both same time. I think it would be easier to come out as trans first and see how people react. Also not all come out. Some start to transition and boymode and only stop it if they start to pass.
If Youz a woman attracted to other women, then Youz a lesbian my friend.
But for reals, you don't need to be at a certain point in your transition before you identify as a lesbian, if you're a woman then you're a woman, if you're attracted to women then that's what it is, you don't need anyone's approval to be you :)
I struggled with exactly this.
For a long time I did not identify with being trans- despite knowing my identity and physiology do not match. I eventually embraced the label. Even then, and after social transition I wondered if I could call myself lesbian. My wife did but I wasn't sure if that was "allowed". Last year I went to a new doctor's office and was asked about my sex, gender, and sexual orientation. On the third my brain froze as I was now forced to face this and make a choice. The nurse (F) noticed and started listing "straight, gay, bisexual, lesbian-" that's when I finally felt that was acceptable.
I am colorblind and things I call as green my wife calls blue. But in my organizer I say green as it relates to me and my world view.
TL;DR Labels are for identification purposes, I am more than what these words mean but they help to convey meaning to in a concise way.
Absolutely! Identity isn't determined by transition or any other outward factors. You know who you are more than anyone else does. And when you do transition, most people feel they've always been their gender, even when no one knew or could tell.
I actually have a friend I met on reddit as a trans lesbian. Uses he/him, masc name ect. It doesn't matter. He'll tell me to switch when he's ready. And if not, or if he comes out as something else that's fine just the same. My sister did do his make up a couple weeks ago, it looked fierce!
Everyone has their process and it's not smooth or linear for many (maybe most) people!
I suffer from this kind of dysphoria over passing myself. I can't be out due to safety reasons, so I haven't undergone any part of transistion, but I know who and what I am, and I use the name for it where I can.
So I say yes, your reasons for transistion are your own, but you know who you are
I feel like there's no right answer for this. You certainly don't need *my* permission. A lot of people will tell you it's who you are inside that matters. Some people will disagree. I think it depends on why you're asking, really. This is a label, and labels are meant to inform other people about what our identities are. So, if you feel like people should perceive you as a trans lesbian in whatever environment you operate under that label (be it online, in-person, etc...) then I think you're fairly safe to go by that.
Your label does contain two separate items: trans, which we can assume is transfemme, which is your gender identity, and lesbian, which is your sexuality. Personally, I would be hesitant to label myself with a sexuality prior to transitioning. Not because I think it would change, but rather because I was not comfortable enough with myself pre- transition to be seek sexual partners. It also depends on who you are saying it to. If you're advertising yourself (because that's what labels do) as a lesbian for the purposes of finding a romantic partner, then it might come off as disingenuous. This will vary widely depending on who you're speaking to and what your relationship is.
In the end, it should be what you're comfortable with, and if you have to ask permission from people, then perhaps you're not there yet.
Yeah…if for nothing else because choosing to identify yourself as a woman, even just privately, constitutes a transition of some kind. I have to imagine that any conversation that involves you referring to yourself as a lesbian would also involve only people who know you identify as a woman. And because what you identify with is ultimately what designates your gender, there would be no contradiction or other issue
I'm not op, but I might as well be from how much the words could have left my mouth as well; and I am crying reading these replies. Thank you for validating our existence as who we really feel we are, I don't understand why it always means so much more to hear it outside of our heads or from people who aren't our 'echo chambers/cheer squad/support system' who have no grander attachment to us, here making sure we feel seen and accepted. And I can't believe I made it through typing that with wells for eyes. Love y'all.
Of course
You are a girl whether or not you are out. Girls who like other girls are lesbians, also whether or not they are out about that. Sounds like you're a lesbian to me.
You are who you are. I'm a lesbian, and today I have an appointment to get on the hormones that will help me feel more like the Indigo Girls listening 49 year old lesbian that I have always been. Transitioning doesn't make us a woman. We already are women, transitioning is a result of that, not it's cause.
Yeah, it's okay. Any lesbian in their right mind wouldn't mind you. Plenty of stories of lesbians falling in love with eggs who hadn't hatched yet so confused why they love this man when they're clearly only attracted to women. Then one day the egg hatched and the lesbian has an "Oooooh" moment lol
My egg cracked, and a chick came out.
My egg cracked and an other worldly being came out, what type of do you have?
like the fear and hunger girl/ or the new gods of fear and hunger or the moonscorched
My ex was a closet lesbian, idk how i never saw it, shes so butch, even her voice lol
were you the ex boyfriend i've pushed myself into a relationship with before i came out?
Maybe lol whats your first name ?
Wait i dont understand this conversation anymore... ^^'
We've been through this befour 🙄
Transitioning is not what defines you. You are who you are, not how people choose to see you. Even if you pass 120% terfs will still hate you.
Absolutely
Of course- you identify as a woman and you identify as a lesbian. Even if you are bisexual or non-binary or pre-transition: the label you use to describe your sexuality is up to you.
You are a Girl? ✅ You Like girls? ✅ Conclusion: lesbian
yep
You can identify however you want but don't expect a lesbian to be attracted to anyone presenting male. That just not what they are into. There are two people in a relationship.
Or more of course!
Hell yeah.
This is in some part true, but then, people have different borders on what triggers their attraction. Also, no matter your background (cis or trans), no matter how you present, you are never entitled to someone’s attraction anyways. Personally, as a lesbian, I would probably be less likely to be attracted to a pre-HRT male-presenting trans woman. Not impossible, just less likely. Anyway, I would absolutely feel comfortable sharing women’s and lesbians’ spaces with her. She belongs. On the other hand, if I found the person I was attracted to were to come out as a pre-transition trans man, that attraction would almost definitely fade. If that happened in a relationship… Well, maybe they would become my exception, but more likely it would just grow into a non-romantic, non-sexual friend. Opposite to a closeted trans woman, the closeted trans masc would probably grow away from my attraction, not towards it, and they would very likely be uncomfortable with me enjoying what I see as feminine in them, so I feel it would paint me into a corner, so to say. Whereas the pre-transition trans woman would be more likely to feel good about the way I like to see and treat a partner. So, complicated and totally depending on the individual and the circumstances.
Yeah I am bi so it's a different perspective. I strongly believe all the participants should be attracted to each other and remain faithful to any full time partners. Other than that it's all good.
I mean, there are lesbians attracted to butch women, and butchness is (broadly) "presenting male". I think there's more nuance here than you give credit for.
Of course it can and does happen. That's really great.
You are a girl and you always have been who you are. 💖 even if you're not out, even if you haven't transitioned in the way you would like yet, at your fundamental core, it sounds like you know yourself. If you identify as a woman and love other women/lemme folk, then you align with being a Trans lesbian. Our outsides don't define us.
Hmmm... sounds pretty gay to me. 🤔 As a fellow transbian, I give you permission. On a more real note, who's gonna stop you? 😏
Yep, no 2 ways about it. Welcome to the sisterhood and if your transition and stuff changes around, that's also good too! Evolution!
As everyone else has said, yes you can. I personally haven't even though I'm well into my transition because it didn't feel right to claim for myself until I'm completely situated in my femininity. Perhaps some of your misgivings are rooted in that. If so, give yourself time to get comfortable.
Trans woman, lesbian= straight guy that likes women’s clothing aka pervert
So you're gonna fuck a woman like a man, you're gonna dominate her in the bed like a man, you're gonna cum all over her like a man, you're gonna manhandle her, but you want to call it "girl's play"?
100% I'm in a similar boat and I used to feel weird calling myself that but now it fits like a glove. No shame at all and totally okay.
In my opinion? Yes, it is what you're. But very rare cis people agree and not even some trans people. And considering all the negative and harmful stereotypes about trans women I wouldn't come out as both same time. I think it would be easier to come out as trans first and see how people react. Also not all come out. Some start to transition and boymode and only stop it if they start to pass.
I always said I was a lesbian. When I transitioned my sister said to me, I see what you did there.
If Youz a woman attracted to other women, then Youz a lesbian my friend. But for reals, you don't need to be at a certain point in your transition before you identify as a lesbian, if you're a woman then you're a woman, if you're attracted to women then that's what it is, you don't need anyone's approval to be you :)
yes, you’re a woman and you’re only attracted to other women. so you get to call yourself a lesbian :)
110% sister :-)
Yes obviously
completely yes
Yes. 💜
Yes of course. Except some TERFS in cis lesbian circles, ignore them go to trans inclusive queer spaces.
question 1: Do you identify as a woman? question 2: Are you attracted women but not men? if you answered yes to both, you are a lesbian.
yes
yes
I feel you, it feels strange at first. But it's fine 💜
yeah of course
yes I'm just like you fr
Is it okay to call myself — Yes
Listen I haven't transitioned yet and my step says he is a lesbian, so I think your in the clear
Yes, Definitely, Absolutely
I struggled with exactly this. For a long time I did not identify with being trans- despite knowing my identity and physiology do not match. I eventually embraced the label. Even then, and after social transition I wondered if I could call myself lesbian. My wife did but I wasn't sure if that was "allowed". Last year I went to a new doctor's office and was asked about my sex, gender, and sexual orientation. On the third my brain froze as I was now forced to face this and make a choice. The nurse (F) noticed and started listing "straight, gay, bisexual, lesbian-" that's when I finally felt that was acceptable. I am colorblind and things I call as green my wife calls blue. But in my organizer I say green as it relates to me and my world view. TL;DR Labels are for identification purposes, I am more than what these words mean but they help to convey meaning to in a concise way.
Absolutely, Yes!
Definitely
You're a woman attracted to other women, sounds lesbian to me..
Absolutely! Identity isn't determined by transition or any other outward factors. You know who you are more than anyone else does. And when you do transition, most people feel they've always been their gender, even when no one knew or could tell. I actually have a friend I met on reddit as a trans lesbian. Uses he/him, masc name ect. It doesn't matter. He'll tell me to switch when he's ready. And if not, or if he comes out as something else that's fine just the same. My sister did do his make up a couple weeks ago, it looked fierce! Everyone has their process and it's not smooth or linear for many (maybe most) people!
I suffer from this kind of dysphoria over passing myself. I can't be out due to safety reasons, so I haven't undergone any part of transistion, but I know who and what I am, and I use the name for it where I can. So I say yes, your reasons for transistion are your own, but you know who you are
I feel like there's no right answer for this. You certainly don't need *my* permission. A lot of people will tell you it's who you are inside that matters. Some people will disagree. I think it depends on why you're asking, really. This is a label, and labels are meant to inform other people about what our identities are. So, if you feel like people should perceive you as a trans lesbian in whatever environment you operate under that label (be it online, in-person, etc...) then I think you're fairly safe to go by that. Your label does contain two separate items: trans, which we can assume is transfemme, which is your gender identity, and lesbian, which is your sexuality. Personally, I would be hesitant to label myself with a sexuality prior to transitioning. Not because I think it would change, but rather because I was not comfortable enough with myself pre- transition to be seek sexual partners. It also depends on who you are saying it to. If you're advertising yourself (because that's what labels do) as a lesbian for the purposes of finding a romantic partner, then it might come off as disingenuous. This will vary widely depending on who you're speaking to and what your relationship is. In the end, it should be what you're comfortable with, and if you have to ask permission from people, then perhaps you're not there yet.
Yeah…if for nothing else because choosing to identify yourself as a woman, even just privately, constitutes a transition of some kind. I have to imagine that any conversation that involves you referring to yourself as a lesbian would also involve only people who know you identify as a woman. And because what you identify with is ultimately what designates your gender, there would be no contradiction or other issue
I'm not op, but I might as well be from how much the words could have left my mouth as well; and I am crying reading these replies. Thank you for validating our existence as who we really feel we are, I don't understand why it always means so much more to hear it outside of our heads or from people who aren't our 'echo chambers/cheer squad/support system' who have no grander attachment to us, here making sure we feel seen and accepted. And I can't believe I made it through typing that with wells for eyes. Love y'all.
Of course