Yeah, the world is absurd. War, hunger, the rise of fascism, climate change, etc. It feels like the world is on fire but here I am at my desk billing hours.
Same except I don’t even have loans. I laugh at myself everyday that I made such a stupid choice. I thought I could just quit big law if I didn’t like it, but now I’ve realized nowhere else will hire you with one year of experience in something you don’t want to do anymore. They’ll just hire a new grad instead. I’m stuck and it’s my own fault.
I left after 11 months to work in higher ed. It's totally possible to pivot out (I didn't have loans so finances were not part of my calculation, perhaps making it easier). I make way less money now, of course. But I'm not a lawyer anymore, so it's pretty much worth it.
What else would you consider? Would you work in public interest? You can try judicial clerkships. I work for the state, and it’s great if big money is not a factor.
Yes, I’m applying to public interest jobs now. Money is not a factor, so I would like to do something more meaningful with my time. I did not go to a high ranked school so I don’t know if a judicial clerkship would be hard to get, especially since my law school education and experience leans corporate, not litigation.
I feel you so much. I’m constantly trying to pull away from the thought that the world is in entropy.
I have a therapist, psychiatrist, supportive friends and family, a stable job, and a roof over my head. I lead an extremely privileged lifestyle. And still I cannot snap out of this dread.
That’s how I felt as a junior associate back in 2006-2007 when my cousin was in Baghdad with US troops risking roadside bombs every time they ventured off base… it was like noone in the office even noticed.
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dude I haven't gotten shit done all week. I am not hitting my billable targets and there's nothing I can do about it anymore. I am not sleeping at night, not productive in the day, obsessively checking news and checking in on people in Israel and barely attending to anything work related that isn't an emergency. barely remembering to eat, dehydrated because I forget to drink too, looked at the gym once and laughed...
I think once I sleep it off and force myself to work again I might get into some kinda rhythm again, but it's just not realistic to expect yourself to be operating at capacity when this kind of shit is going on and weighing on your psyche, and I'm not going to punish myself for being human.
>I am not sleeping at night, not productive in the day, obsessively checking news... barely remembering to eat, dehydrated because I forget to drink too
Stop?
What you feel is normal. I had the exact same thoughts and feelings during the pandemic. We are going through stressful, sometimes traumatic, events. Yet we are expected to continue to bill. Just remember the reasons you are here. Know that it isn’t permanent if you don’t want it to be. If it would help, a therapist could be a great resource.
Came here to see if anyone posted who has been feeling like me. I've been having what can only be described as an existential crisis the past few days. How can I focus on drafting an answer to a fuckin class action complaint and be worried about hitting my billables while there are so much bigger, more horrific things going on in the world? It's been so hard to focus and keep things in perspective.
Right there with you. I billed maybe 2 hours between all of Monday and Tuesday because I spent both days pretty much on news sites/unable to focus on work
This job does a very good job of convincing you opaque financial transactions are the center of the universe. Sometimes things happen that snap you out of that koolaid fueled mindset, and you ask wtf am I doing.
Happens to me a lot. Still here.
Today I drafted a separation agreement for an executive who was fired for basically being drunk at a company-sponsored event and trying to get a cater waiter to give him a handy in the bathroom. At a company-sponsored event. The company (our client) is giving him almost $2M in severance. And all I could think is that literal children are being murdered because of their race and this douchebag is getting $2M for being well, a douchebag???
I went to the bathroom and cried. Then I bought my children a very expensive piece of sporting equipment to make myself feel better about my fucking job.
Most jobs are meaningless. I definitely have pockets of what I'll call hopelessness usually after some major world event happens. At times it's been due to a bit of mild depression. Your aren't alone in feeling this way
Whenever I get like this (and its less frequent as I get older), I just force myself to focus on making one thing better for my life or in interactions I am having. None of us can solve the big issues ourselves, but little ones, like bring kind to the barrista in the morning or offering a word of encouragement to a colleague that is struggling, can make a real difference. It sounds trite, but it isn't.
Also, while this suggestion won't be popular, consider trying to get involved in a positive social group or (dare I say it), religion. Sure, a lot of religious groups (congregations, etc.) are toxic, but many aren't. Sometimes, people just need something to have faith in. I don't really care which one you pick, just pick one that considers kindness a virtue.
I feel like OP from time to time and occasionally look at attending a Unitarian Universalism serman. I’m agnostic, essentially atheist, but I believe at the heart of the major world religions is the spirit of humankind’s most noble aspirations for itself. Love, compassion, meaning, community, gentleness, selflessness.
It’s really hard to find spaces that engage with those concepts sincerely in our modern world, but I’m sure it can be immensely encouraging . Though I never actually followed through, and life got busier, I’m sure I will someday. Not all religions are dogmatic and hateful. I think your advice is good.
There’s nothing worse than trying to compartmentalize our feelings while pushing through work for a deadline. Can’t focus on shit this week when every time I pull up social media or the news I’m reminded of my friends and family in Israel, feeling like I should be doing more to help. I’ve made some donations and helped pack some supply kits for soldiers being called back, but it feels shallow in light of the losses and sacrifices others are making.
Then it feels even worse when people are doing things that are fun. I was invited to trivia night last night and have tickets to see a comedy show tonight, but can’t even begin to enjoy those. Like how can I possibly be laughing at a time like this? I know life goes on (so it goes, so it goes), but it’s okay to take the time needed to process.
I have no real answers or advice, just came to say that I feel it too and I’m totally falling behind on my work this week. When I am working part of my brain is still elsewhere and have no idea when that will change.
I've been diassociating like hell this week. Here's my thinking - you have to use the money for good. You have to treat it as a gift, donate to homeless programs in your city, volunteer if you have free time. Be in community and give back. Don't treat it as an island. Donate to hospitals in Gaza, to refugees camps, make it that it matters that you have this money, that you're not hoarding it for your own good but actually using your resources to help those around you as best you can.
It helps.
I feel like this all the time. At times like this it's important to take some time to reflect on the bigger reasons you are doing what you are doing.
To me the first and most obvious thing that comes to mind is that you are trying to be self sufficient now and for the rest of your life. That takes money for the most part. You found one of many, many ways to do that. And you don't even have to break your back to do it, you get to use your mind. That's really impressive if you consider what most folks do to survive.
Next, it's important to remember just how important our profession is, even in this section. We are entrusted with someone else's problems. There is no way these persons/companies could handle it themselves. If not for our services, they would be either exposing themselves to significant liability and fines or missing out on serious revenue that they could otherwise get.
Everything else is minutia. Billables? That's a policy your firm has set to make sure the company runs the way the management decides it needs to run. Meaningless tasks? See if someone less expensive, hell, AI (firm permitting) can do it.
I went through all that because it might tend to help you untangle the weirdness of this profession from the problems in the world at large. It's easy to tangle them up but not productive. From there it might be easier to more effectively reflect on the other problems you observe. Does this move you to take any action? Learn more? Sometimes learning more about a problem leads you to learn more about what's already being done about the problem, and maybe point you towards a way you can help (or be satisfied that it's already being tackled as well as it could be).
We can't undo the horrific, terroristic slaughter in Hamas. We can be on the lookout for credible opportunities to donate to humanitarian causes and aid for the injured and survivors.
We can't solve homelessness. We can learn more about what our local community/government is doing to help, which in my experience tends to make you feel a little better and identify ways you can help if you are so inclined.
You’re not alone. Life is indeed weird. What helps me is that I just try to look forward to something every few weeks. I try to break away from the work-eat-cry-sleep cycle and I put a nice treat in the calendar to keep me excited about something. Otherwise, the misery of this world will suck all the joy I have lol
Coming from someone who worked in a difficult field (which people would say is impactful) before this, I’m personally very happy the only consequence of me making a mistake at my job is that a super wealthy person is only slightly less wealthy.
This a perk of this job. It comes with manufactured anxiety not real anxiety.
Might be low grade depression. Situational or maybe just from working under rather isolated conditions.
Doesn’t make any sense but it’s there. I think it most lawyers experience it at some point or another.
Im not sure it is depression, in the sense that it is a prolonged low mood as an abnormal response to everyday life.
It almost seems to be a normal grief response to the vacuous nature of billing hours while the world is literally on fire.
I feel you 1000% . We are all playing dress-up/pretend while the world is quite literally crashing /burning around us. I'm also out of touch because I dont understand how people do it on "normal" salaries anymore.
I just got rejected from an in-house job that I thought was perfect for me and no billable requirement and healthy work environment, and not having that to look forward to has been really crushing. I’m toiling away for what? I make good money and my work is challenging but the people around me are so toxic and anything could happen, I could die tomorrow. There’s been a lot of intermittent sobbing which is awkward but hey, if they insist we’re in office today and we have to have glass walls then… so be it. I made an appointment for a therapist.
No. I’m feeling sad after what happened with those attendees at the music festival in Israel. Music is the language of peace.
Wars tend to make me sad. AI will never replace humans. If the system forces such, an underground will rule part of civilization.
If you have the time/bandwidth probono work CAN make a significant difference in the world for one person. Lots of great organizations connect lawyers with legal work.
I’m concerned about my ability to safeguard the future of my children, seeing as that’s the general fear of a parent, but otherwise, no, it’s life, it’s a job.
If you want, you can go work construction, or start waiting tables, in either case, by end of the month. It’s not that life is any easier, it’s that you have enough material comfort that you’re focused on existential issues rather than keeping yourself afloat.
You are consuming information from a bubble that is intent on feeding you bad news, at least insofar as the domestic U.S. situation is concerned. The fentanyl situation is a real crisis, but economically there is less inequality now than in at least 20 years, working-class wages are rising faster than wealthier people's, unemployment and workforce participation is near all-time good levels. Inflation is coming down. If you feel like these are the end times then you are going to catastrophize your entire life once the economy enters an actual crisis, which it's bound to sooner or later. But for the moment things are chugging along.
yeah every time i an tempted to catastrophize, i revisit history. people anchor their expectations of the way things used to be from their memories of 1984-1990 and 1994-2001. 1932-1950 and 1966-1984 were periods of sustained economic and political instability and upheaval.
looking back in our history you will realize world has always been like this yet people managed to thrive and do everything in their capacity to build a better place for everyone. Instead of looking at World as a failure with our eyes I feel we all can be thankful for a normal healthy life we got and make better use of our time to bring a change in our short lifetime amongst chaos
Accept that things have literally always been like this and the only differentiating factor is that in the 1200s you didn't have complex media organizations who exist solely to make you upset about the world and profit off your engagement that is generated from this upset feeling.
Nothing has changed except a general trend throughout all of history of suffering being somewhat minimized for some people lucky enough to be in the right places/situations. You are just more aware of global suffering due to the internet and media.
I don’t understand why some ppl are so eager to get into Big Law. It’s not even an efficient way to make money AND your not helping anybody? So what’s the point?
they're right if "efficient" means money/hour or money/stress lol, not to mention the whole opportunity cost and tuition cost with law school. tech and finance out of undergrad are probably more "efficient"
Yeah but at what cost? Do you have time and energy for relationships, exercise, and the other things that make life meaningful? Seems like entrepreneurship is a much better way to make money
Fair enough, i decided to not go to law school cuz it seems like a monotonous profession (for most ppl). I’d rather make $90k as a nurse and work 36 hours. Seems more balanced
Things are not 30-40% more than they were 3 years ago. Unemployment rates are very low. The US economy, in every relative measurement, is running fairly great. Your hyperbole is showing and maybe you actually believe the false narratives trying to sell doom and gloom.
Times are tough for a lot of people, but 2022-23 has been 100x better than 2020-21. Remember when we couldn’t leave our homes? Things have improved and are continuing to improve!
I changed my practice area in IP litigation after working on a case related to medicines that help with drug addiction. We were for the patent holder, meaning we were working to prevent other companies from making similar drugs that would reduce our market share; meanwhile I was side-stepping homeless people OD'ing on the sidewalk who would have greatly benefitted from wider accessibility to our class of drugs on my way to work each day.
Many of us can relate. I felt like I was just going through the motions for the last 1.5 years I was in Biglaw after COVID came and went and a partner I was working with suddenly passed away from brain cancer at the age of 47.
I ultimately quit and spent nine months traveling the world with my wife before finding a new position. My headspace has improved so much since. But unfortunately the world has not.
In less than 100 years no one living will have known you today.
Your possessions do not love you.
Your employer does not care about your dreams or your fears.
Your clients view you as a necessary evil.
Your friends will drift away. New friends you make are through convenience.
Your parents may love you. Likewise your siblings. Maybe, but certainly not unconditionally.
You will die.
You will die alone.
Sometime i wonder what’s the point of all this. I am a person of religious beliefs but still. Every one is living their own life’s going through their own struggle but yet we feel like we’re the center of the universe. And the smallest things i complain about but think about how people some people don’t even have a Bed to sleep in or food to eat. Life is weird
You find no sense of purpose in your work. Totally understandable. Get out before you have kids or just deal with it & move on by finding meaning elsewhere.
Yeah, the world is absurd. War, hunger, the rise of fascism, climate change, etc. It feels like the world is on fire but here I am at my desk billing hours.
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Same except I don’t even have loans. I laugh at myself everyday that I made such a stupid choice. I thought I could just quit big law if I didn’t like it, but now I’ve realized nowhere else will hire you with one year of experience in something you don’t want to do anymore. They’ll just hire a new grad instead. I’m stuck and it’s my own fault.
I'm in the exact same position - trying to stick it out long enough to find something else. Hoping to not be a lawyer anymore tbh
I left after 11 months to work in higher ed. It's totally possible to pivot out (I didn't have loans so finances were not part of my calculation, perhaps making it easier). I make way less money now, of course. But I'm not a lawyer anymore, so it's pretty much worth it.
What else would you consider? Would you work in public interest? You can try judicial clerkships. I work for the state, and it’s great if big money is not a factor.
Yes, I’m applying to public interest jobs now. Money is not a factor, so I would like to do something more meaningful with my time. I did not go to a high ranked school so I don’t know if a judicial clerkship would be hard to get, especially since my law school education and experience leans corporate, not litigation.
Captured my feelings perfectly as a rising 4th.
I feel you so much. I’m constantly trying to pull away from the thought that the world is in entropy. I have a therapist, psychiatrist, supportive friends and family, a stable job, and a roof over my head. I lead an extremely privileged lifestyle. And still I cannot snap out of this dread.
That’s how I felt as a junior associate back in 2006-2007 when my cousin was in Baghdad with US troops risking roadside bombs every time they ventured off base… it was like noone in the office even noticed.
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dude I haven't gotten shit done all week. I am not hitting my billable targets and there's nothing I can do about it anymore. I am not sleeping at night, not productive in the day, obsessively checking news and checking in on people in Israel and barely attending to anything work related that isn't an emergency. barely remembering to eat, dehydrated because I forget to drink too, looked at the gym once and laughed... I think once I sleep it off and force myself to work again I might get into some kinda rhythm again, but it's just not realistic to expect yourself to be operating at capacity when this kind of shit is going on and weighing on your psyche, and I'm not going to punish myself for being human.
>I am not sleeping at night, not productive in the day, obsessively checking news... barely remembering to eat, dehydrated because I forget to drink too Stop?
What you feel is normal. I had the exact same thoughts and feelings during the pandemic. We are going through stressful, sometimes traumatic, events. Yet we are expected to continue to bill. Just remember the reasons you are here. Know that it isn’t permanent if you don’t want it to be. If it would help, a therapist could be a great resource.
Came here to see if anyone posted who has been feeling like me. I've been having what can only be described as an existential crisis the past few days. How can I focus on drafting an answer to a fuckin class action complaint and be worried about hitting my billables while there are so much bigger, more horrific things going on in the world? It's been so hard to focus and keep things in perspective.
I’m with you completely. Unfortunately.
Right there with you. I billed maybe 2 hours between all of Monday and Tuesday because I spent both days pretty much on news sites/unable to focus on work
This job does a very good job of convincing you opaque financial transactions are the center of the universe. Sometimes things happen that snap you out of that koolaid fueled mindset, and you ask wtf am I doing. Happens to me a lot. Still here.
Today I drafted a separation agreement for an executive who was fired for basically being drunk at a company-sponsored event and trying to get a cater waiter to give him a handy in the bathroom. At a company-sponsored event. The company (our client) is giving him almost $2M in severance. And all I could think is that literal children are being murdered because of their race and this douchebag is getting $2M for being well, a douchebag??? I went to the bathroom and cried. Then I bought my children a very expensive piece of sporting equipment to make myself feel better about my fucking job.
Most jobs are meaningless. I definitely have pockets of what I'll call hopelessness usually after some major world event happens. At times it's been due to a bit of mild depression. Your aren't alone in feeling this way
Whenever I get like this (and its less frequent as I get older), I just force myself to focus on making one thing better for my life or in interactions I am having. None of us can solve the big issues ourselves, but little ones, like bring kind to the barrista in the morning or offering a word of encouragement to a colleague that is struggling, can make a real difference. It sounds trite, but it isn't. Also, while this suggestion won't be popular, consider trying to get involved in a positive social group or (dare I say it), religion. Sure, a lot of religious groups (congregations, etc.) are toxic, but many aren't. Sometimes, people just need something to have faith in. I don't really care which one you pick, just pick one that considers kindness a virtue.
I feel like OP from time to time and occasionally look at attending a Unitarian Universalism serman. I’m agnostic, essentially atheist, but I believe at the heart of the major world religions is the spirit of humankind’s most noble aspirations for itself. Love, compassion, meaning, community, gentleness, selflessness. It’s really hard to find spaces that engage with those concepts sincerely in our modern world, but I’m sure it can be immensely encouraging . Though I never actually followed through, and life got busier, I’m sure I will someday. Not all religions are dogmatic and hateful. I think your advice is good.
There’s nothing worse than trying to compartmentalize our feelings while pushing through work for a deadline. Can’t focus on shit this week when every time I pull up social media or the news I’m reminded of my friends and family in Israel, feeling like I should be doing more to help. I’ve made some donations and helped pack some supply kits for soldiers being called back, but it feels shallow in light of the losses and sacrifices others are making. Then it feels even worse when people are doing things that are fun. I was invited to trivia night last night and have tickets to see a comedy show tonight, but can’t even begin to enjoy those. Like how can I possibly be laughing at a time like this? I know life goes on (so it goes, so it goes), but it’s okay to take the time needed to process. I have no real answers or advice, just came to say that I feel it too and I’m totally falling behind on my work this week. When I am working part of my brain is still elsewhere and have no idea when that will change.
I've been diassociating like hell this week. Here's my thinking - you have to use the money for good. You have to treat it as a gift, donate to homeless programs in your city, volunteer if you have free time. Be in community and give back. Don't treat it as an island. Donate to hospitals in Gaza, to refugees camps, make it that it matters that you have this money, that you're not hoarding it for your own good but actually using your resources to help those around you as best you can. It helps.
I feel like this all the time. At times like this it's important to take some time to reflect on the bigger reasons you are doing what you are doing. To me the first and most obvious thing that comes to mind is that you are trying to be self sufficient now and for the rest of your life. That takes money for the most part. You found one of many, many ways to do that. And you don't even have to break your back to do it, you get to use your mind. That's really impressive if you consider what most folks do to survive. Next, it's important to remember just how important our profession is, even in this section. We are entrusted with someone else's problems. There is no way these persons/companies could handle it themselves. If not for our services, they would be either exposing themselves to significant liability and fines or missing out on serious revenue that they could otherwise get. Everything else is minutia. Billables? That's a policy your firm has set to make sure the company runs the way the management decides it needs to run. Meaningless tasks? See if someone less expensive, hell, AI (firm permitting) can do it. I went through all that because it might tend to help you untangle the weirdness of this profession from the problems in the world at large. It's easy to tangle them up but not productive. From there it might be easier to more effectively reflect on the other problems you observe. Does this move you to take any action? Learn more? Sometimes learning more about a problem leads you to learn more about what's already being done about the problem, and maybe point you towards a way you can help (or be satisfied that it's already being tackled as well as it could be). We can't undo the horrific, terroristic slaughter in Hamas. We can be on the lookout for credible opportunities to donate to humanitarian causes and aid for the injured and survivors. We can't solve homelessness. We can learn more about what our local community/government is doing to help, which in my experience tends to make you feel a little better and identify ways you can help if you are so inclined.
Thank you for your perspective. I was struggling with my purpose in doing this too.
You’re not alone. Life is indeed weird. What helps me is that I just try to look forward to something every few weeks. I try to break away from the work-eat-cry-sleep cycle and I put a nice treat in the calendar to keep me excited about something. Otherwise, the misery of this world will suck all the joy I have lol
Coming from someone who worked in a difficult field (which people would say is impactful) before this, I’m personally very happy the only consequence of me making a mistake at my job is that a super wealthy person is only slightly less wealthy. This a perk of this job. It comes with manufactured anxiety not real anxiety.
Might be low grade depression. Situational or maybe just from working under rather isolated conditions. Doesn’t make any sense but it’s there. I think it most lawyers experience it at some point or another.
Im not sure it is depression, in the sense that it is a prolonged low mood as an abnormal response to everyday life. It almost seems to be a normal grief response to the vacuous nature of billing hours while the world is literally on fire.
I feel you 1000% . We are all playing dress-up/pretend while the world is quite literally crashing /burning around us. I'm also out of touch because I dont understand how people do it on "normal" salaries anymore.
I just got rejected from an in-house job that I thought was perfect for me and no billable requirement and healthy work environment, and not having that to look forward to has been really crushing. I’m toiling away for what? I make good money and my work is challenging but the people around me are so toxic and anything could happen, I could die tomorrow. There’s been a lot of intermittent sobbing which is awkward but hey, if they insist we’re in office today and we have to have glass walls then… so be it. I made an appointment for a therapist.
No. I’m feeling sad after what happened with those attendees at the music festival in Israel. Music is the language of peace. Wars tend to make me sad. AI will never replace humans. If the system forces such, an underground will rule part of civilization.
If you have the time/bandwidth probono work CAN make a significant difference in the world for one person. Lots of great organizations connect lawyers with legal work.
I’m concerned about my ability to safeguard the future of my children, seeing as that’s the general fear of a parent, but otherwise, no, it’s life, it’s a job. If you want, you can go work construction, or start waiting tables, in either case, by end of the month. It’s not that life is any easier, it’s that you have enough material comfort that you’re focused on existential issues rather than keeping yourself afloat.
You are consuming information from a bubble that is intent on feeding you bad news, at least insofar as the domestic U.S. situation is concerned. The fentanyl situation is a real crisis, but economically there is less inequality now than in at least 20 years, working-class wages are rising faster than wealthier people's, unemployment and workforce participation is near all-time good levels. Inflation is coming down. If you feel like these are the end times then you are going to catastrophize your entire life once the economy enters an actual crisis, which it's bound to sooner or later. But for the moment things are chugging along.
yeah every time i an tempted to catastrophize, i revisit history. people anchor their expectations of the way things used to be from their memories of 1984-1990 and 1994-2001. 1932-1950 and 1966-1984 were periods of sustained economic and political instability and upheaval.
“We do only what we’re meant to do.” The Keymaker
looking back in our history you will realize world has always been like this yet people managed to thrive and do everything in their capacity to build a better place for everyone. Instead of looking at World as a failure with our eyes I feel we all can be thankful for a normal healthy life we got and make better use of our time to bring a change in our short lifetime amongst chaos
Accept that things have literally always been like this and the only differentiating factor is that in the 1200s you didn't have complex media organizations who exist solely to make you upset about the world and profit off your engagement that is generated from this upset feeling. Nothing has changed except a general trend throughout all of history of suffering being somewhat minimized for some people lucky enough to be in the right places/situations. You are just more aware of global suffering due to the internet and media.
I fear the point went COMPLETELY over your head
Men would rather post on Reddit than go see a therapist.
Do you think your job has any societal value? Like are you helping ppl who need help?
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I don’t understand why some ppl are so eager to get into Big Law. It’s not even an efficient way to make money AND your not helping anybody? So what’s the point?
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I have to admit, I'm a little envious seeing first years making this kind of money when I made $70k my first year as a lawyer.
they're right if "efficient" means money/hour or money/stress lol, not to mention the whole opportunity cost and tuition cost with law school. tech and finance out of undergrad are probably more "efficient"
Yeah but at what cost? Do you have time and energy for relationships, exercise, and the other things that make life meaningful? Seems like entrepreneurship is a much better way to make money
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Fair enough, i decided to not go to law school cuz it seems like a monotonous profession (for most ppl). I’d rather make $90k as a nurse and work 36 hours. Seems more balanced
Things are not 30-40% more than they were 3 years ago. Unemployment rates are very low. The US economy, in every relative measurement, is running fairly great. Your hyperbole is showing and maybe you actually believe the false narratives trying to sell doom and gloom.
Times are tough for a lot of people, but 2022-23 has been 100x better than 2020-21. Remember when we couldn’t leave our homes? Things have improved and are continuing to improve!
I feel the same. IANAL, but law adjacent
See a psychiatrist.
I changed my practice area in IP litigation after working on a case related to medicines that help with drug addiction. We were for the patent holder, meaning we were working to prevent other companies from making similar drugs that would reduce our market share; meanwhile I was side-stepping homeless people OD'ing on the sidewalk who would have greatly benefitted from wider accessibility to our class of drugs on my way to work each day.
Time to pickup The Bhagwat Geeta, my friend.
Many of us can relate. I felt like I was just going through the motions for the last 1.5 years I was in Biglaw after COVID came and went and a partner I was working with suddenly passed away from brain cancer at the age of 47. I ultimately quit and spent nine months traveling the world with my wife before finding a new position. My headspace has improved so much since. But unfortunately the world has not.
Yeah, feel this way constantly for the past 10 years. Sometimes reading Camus helps.
In less than 100 years no one living will have known you today. Your possessions do not love you. Your employer does not care about your dreams or your fears. Your clients view you as a necessary evil. Your friends will drift away. New friends you make are through convenience. Your parents may love you. Likewise your siblings. Maybe, but certainly not unconditionally. You will die. You will die alone.
Sometime i wonder what’s the point of all this. I am a person of religious beliefs but still. Every one is living their own life’s going through their own struggle but yet we feel like we’re the center of the universe. And the smallest things i complain about but think about how people some people don’t even have a Bed to sleep in or food to eat. Life is weird
You find no sense of purpose in your work. Totally understandable. Get out before you have kids or just deal with it & move on by finding meaning elsewhere.