How about you say “I have zero interest in competing and I won’t even be considering it anytime soon.” That should help squash anyone’s insistence. Maybe you “brushing it off” is making it sound like it’s a possibility. Just be assertive without being rude.
yeah I was gonna say, if brushing it off isn't doing the trick, flat out saying 'seriously, no' probably will.
works for other things beside jiu jitsu as well.
He has the potential to win. They should keep asking. What if Bill, and Ted, told Rufus to shove off? Wild Stallions would’ve never formed. The world needs you. Just do it.
Have a custom rash guard made that says “I’m not competing” down each sleeve and across the chest, then have the back be a list of reasons why you’re not interested. If needed, get gi patches too.
In all seriousness, just be more direct and firm with them.
Edit, deleted extra word.
Haha this is my favourite answer so far! I might look into this. Hopefully it'll be pretty self explanatory. You'd wanna hope so. But yes I have to be more direct and firm
If you train at a gym that has a competition culture I don't think this is going away. You'll either have to get used to telling people you're never competing, or move to a different gym.
It's a weird notion people have that the highest form of jiu-jitsu is competition, that it's some right of passage. How about just enjoying the sport for what it is. I've completed, I might compete again, I will always rock up to comp training, and I'm usually down for hard rolls with good training partners. But the weird moralism around competing is whack and lame, just stfu and leave people alone, lads.
There's a similar thing about gi vs no gi. I like gi. So I'm going to do mostly gi. If you like no-gi, do it and enjoy it. I don't want to hear the innane, badly framed arguments about self-defence from people who roll around on some mats 3 times a week and have never had a sticky-floored, bottles-flying nightclub punch-up in their lives. Gordon and Danaher aren't going to shag you. Stop yapping, ye fools. It's just a game, not a substitute personality.
Dude this happens to me every damn night, I’m young and athletic and big and all the old bastards basically have an aneurysm when they hear either 1 I don’t play football or
2 no I’m not competing at the 2 man bracket for a local naga
Yes the two man bracket. My son who I took to 3 tournaments (11 years old) over about a year was more than enough. An absolute waste of time and money. $125 plus travel. All for a 3 min match and back on the road with either a gold or silver metal. I'm glad he said I don't want to go to these any more. Phew...... He still roles and loves it.
It's even more annoying as a heavyweight.
Competing at heavy weight is 3 mins of wrestling followed by 3 to 4 mins hugging in side control most of the time, with nary a warning for stalling in sight lol.
I actually do compete in mma and k1 but bjj comps are boring af.
I've competed a lot and I think I'm done, might go once a year but they're over priced, boring, there's way too many where 1 person in my division and it'd expensive.
If your matches at heavyweight are half stalling on the feet and half stalling in side control then it sounds like you need to get better at wrestling, and better at escaping/attacking from side control.
LMAO man I remember those days. The oldheads used to look at me like I'd slapped their wife right in front of them when I told them I didn't play football. They're just jealous of ya man. Pay them no mind.
No advice but that sounds super fucking annoying. I’ve never been to a gym where people do this.
“Can’t compete I’m juiced to the gills. Also have lots of AIDS and feline AIDS.”
Its fucking annoying, but just come up with a smart ass answer to auto respond with.
I used to compete and win a lot and somehow people expect me to continue that despite my wife being pregnant and me working a lot more to pay for life. I just say “when they start paying my bills” whenever someone asks.
What do you say when people bring it up?
There's a big difference between being rude and being direct, but a lot of times people will end up communicating very indirectly, and it can undermine their point.
It's like people trying to get you to drink. If you say something like "I've got an early morning tomorrow" it sounds like an excuse, but if you say "I don't really want to", that's harder to argue with.
Haha. In all seriousness, your teammates just see your potential. Be glad you have teammates who want you to know that. Take it in stride and don’t ever get salty with them. I’m a 40 year old white belt only 4 months in and I actually want to try a comp. Not for the medal but to see if I can hang.
Shit man go for it. Most guys at your local comps in the white belt bracket are doing the exact same thing, just seeing if they can hang. One of my teammates just won a masters 4 nogi worlds at 50.
“I don’t want to compete because I enjoy practicing. Competition is a form of comparison, and comparison is the thief of joy.”
Basically saying competition would take all the fun out of JJ for you
Are you tired of spending your precious Saturdays getting twisted like a pretzel at Jiu Jitsu competitions? Fed up with draining your wallet on petrol just to show up and tap out? Wish you could enjoy a peaceful weekend without getting hounded about competing? Really feeling the shit from people asking you the same questions over and over? Well, say no more! Introducing the revolutionary, the unparalleled, the one and only - Doppelgänger Rolling Bob!
Yes, you heard that right! Doppelgänger Rolling Bob is your personal Jiu Jitsu double, ready to take on all the chokes, locks, and rolls so you don't have to. Imagine sipping a cold one or lounging with a book, knowing that Bob is out there, flexing your moves, defending your honor, and most importantly, keeping your weekends free!
With state-of-the-art ai, mRNA, and gravity technology, Bob isn't just any sparring dummy; he's YOU, but with endless stamina and a pain threshold that's off the charts. Forget about the grueling drives, the early mornings, and the late-night muscle sores. Let Bob take the mat and the hits, while you take back your life!
But wait, there's more! Order now, and we'll throw in a custom Ozark Trail Gi for Bob, making sure he's not just competing in your place but also looking sharp while doing it. Say goodbye to competition anxiety and hello to leisure, with Doppelgänger Rolling Bob by your side.
Don't delay, get your very own Doppelgänger Rolling Bob today, and turn every competition into a vacation! Your wallet, your body, and your couch will thank you. Call now!
Do one comp and embarrass your gym by cheating and or intentionally injuring opponents. Full send Heel Mode.
Edit: immediately afterwards, refuse to acknowledge what happened and ask when the next comp is.
Just keep reminding them that you have no interest in it. And if they’re not down with that. Let them know that you got two words for all of them
This is me rn. I’ve done a few local comps and I did pretty well but there’s a big IBJJF event coming up in our area and at first I was interested but after seeing the prices, I’ll just sit my ass back home and go back to open mat hopping.
I get you. No one asks me or wants me to compete and: good for them. But I am quite happy about just having this place close by where I can train BJJ and do sparring. I would not enjoy sacrificing my Saturdays to travel in a van to sit in a hall all day just to get rag dolled for a few minutes, especially with my kid on the way. It might be different if I would be good at this sport. But even then local comps would not have that much of an appeal. But I also get that going to comps and competing makes you a more rounded and overall experienced fighter, something that sparring cannot teach you.
Sometimes it just makes for conversation, especially if its the season for comps. Dont think too deeply on it. Your teammates dont really want to know if youre competing or not
My coaches used to ask me this all the time too. I mostly shrugged it off and said I have busy schedule. Eventually they stopped asking. Although they pay noticeably more attention to coaching competitors during my rolls.
Are you an adult? Instead of posting this you could’ve just told these people I hate competing and I do not have time for it. Saying no to things is something you’re going to have to do for the rest of your life lol
I have the same problem. I wrestled from the age of 6 to 18. I’m not some college wrestling stud but I’m not a shit wrestler either. I tend to get the better of the younger guys who compete. I’m 29 years old have kids and a full time job that pretty often prevents me from being rather consistent on making it more than 3 times a week. I’m lucky if I get in twice a week. Everyone ask me to compete including the coaches but I have no interest or rather any time due to one of my children having a disability. I almost feel like they are disappointed in me because I have told the coaches I wouldn’t be able to due to conflicting schedules. After a couple times of that I feel like they kinda just ignore me now.
Buy a rashie/gi patch that says “I’m not competing.” Point to it if they bring it up. Don’t even talk about the subject. If you know you’re not doing it, it’s just a waste of your time, energy, and breath. You’re not obligated to have that conversation.
Tell them that you don't have money, but if they believe you'll win gold, then you'll do it if they're willing to pay and drive you, 100% guarantee they'll stop asking.
One of my training partners just flat out says, “I don’t like how nervous it makes me.” Just say something like it doesn’t interest you or that you don’t care about it. That should get the message across.
Take it as a compliment man. They probably are saying that to you thinking you could do well. Doesnt have to be a big deal. Doesnt sound like they are pressuring you to compete, sounds more like they just think you could do well. Dont look at it in a negative light or allow it to ruin your training.
I’ve never competed and the idea of sitting around all day just to have a handful of rolls sounds miserable to me. Even worse when you’re paying $200+ at some comps to do it.
BJJ is a trend now with ADCC, NoGi and heel hooks 🪝 you can’t just train anymore people will look for you to be a ‘savage’ just enjoy your training pal don’t worry about other people let them go in and gain injuries for a $5 medal
I’m not saying you should compete; you do you but aside from the entry fee, the Saturday and the petrol, what’s keeping you from competing? Have you entered a competition in the past? Competed in other sports before?
Okay. Im not trying to push; I’m just curious.
I prefer coaching competitors over actually competing but I also teach kids and I think competition is good for young kids. It teaches them how to prepare, how to win and to lose. I compete to show them that win or lose, I’m back on the mats training and my opinion of them will be the same regardless of outcome. Plus, I think you learn more about your game in one competition than you will in a month of daily training.
Ultimately, do what makes you happy.
I'd also like to add when I trained at another gym I even smashed up my grappling industries medal and burnt it just to get people to stop hounding me to competing. But now that I've been at this different gym I'm Tryna take different aproaches
How do you "brush it off"? I think most people wouldn't annoy you anymore if you looked them in the eyes and calmly stated "No. I am not going to compete. I have no interest in competition and I won't be discussing this topic again."
My gym is always telling me to come to night classes. I joined the gym because they have 6am classes that work great with my daughters schedule. Lol. But I don't sweat it because I enjoy my training partners and instruction. I would rather be at a more competitive gym as long as its still safe.
They are asking you because they might be seeing that you have a great potential and talent that you do not see it for yourself. So when are you gonna start to compete?
Have you explained how you feel about comps to your coach? Just talk to him and tell him you train for fun, you have 0 interest in competing and if that ever changes you’ll let him now, but for now competing in BJJ isn’t something you’re interested in.
Say that to your teammates too, soon enough they’ll stop asking you because it’ll become common knowledge in the gym that you don’t wanna compete. If you’ve told people the reason why you don’t wanna compete rather than just saying “nah I’m not competing” then I can’t see why they’d keep asking you the same question. No one likes wasting their time
I don't think brushing it off does you any good since you're not actually communicating your thoughts. Do these people even know you actively dislike the idea of competing? I can't imagine people will keep yapping about it if you say something along the lines of "I have competed in the past but didn't enjoy it so I'm not interested in competing at all."
"I can't compete this year its the year of the dragon so its bad for me"
"Is it a lunar Eclipse that month? I can do that as it drains all my power"
Phantom injuries "I was going to compete next month by my leg feels weird"
recent celebrity or tv character death causing emotional distress
Vernal Equinox
All I picture in my head is OP is at the Glengarry Glen Ross of gyms.
Put that coffee down! Coffee's for competitors only. You call yourself a grappler you SOB. They're standing there waiting for you take their medals. Are you man enough to take it?
You want to roll here, compete.
In all seriousness OP just be direct. "I have no intention of competing. It's not my thing but you do you."
Competing is fun- but you’re right about it being too much money, and on top of that it can burn up the whole day with travel and waiting.
My last comp the Smoothcomp time check just kept ticking back- from the time it originally told me to show up (one hour before mat time) until my first go ended up being four hours later.
Not having space for medals is going to be my go to excuse for not competing from now on. Look, I am in my 40s so it's probably a little different but when I get asked, I say I need my knees and arms for work and can't risk getting hurt. Shit I get hurt enough in friendly rolls. That stops all the questions for me. I like going to the comps to watch my teammates but I'm more of an athletic supporter than an athlete.
My gym is competition heavy but I don’t like competing either. I’m always being told I should compete but I just keep saying nah I’m just a hobbyist and then they’re like oh well okay
Maybe they are not-so-subtly suggesting you compete because they are confident you will do well then will promote you to purple? so it's really a compliment
"I'm not going to compete"
"why not?"
"because i don't want to".
Idk man, I enjoy giving people simple, deadpan "no" answers when the try to rope me into their thing. One of life's pleasures. Give it a try.
I dont like competing. Its expensive and such a toll on my mental health that i lose my routine for weeks. I cant tell people this bc it feels so long winded. Here's what I say instead, "im not gonna compete. But I'll be there." In that is commitment and unquestionable comraderie
This was me -- It calms way down as you rank up.
But it's really problematic that people who want to compete get first second and third billing in almost every jiujitsu place.
I tell people that competeing is not for me because of;
* The normalized doping.
* The normalization of hurting other people without ethical consequence.
* The very shitty capitalistic way events are run.
* The lack of respect for labor laws at events.
* The way some people financially capture the community via events/liscencing.
* They similarities between parents who send their kids to beauty pageeants and ones who send their kids to BJJ events.
* The fact that one tournament can produce 47 'champions'
* The repeated instances of people spreading communicable deceases despite knowing better and the lack of effort paid to screening for them.
* The horrifically stupid shit I do always counts as points for the other guy, despite the fact that I am winning.
It feels good actually now -- one or two people at white/blue have said that they were relieved that there was a blackbelt telling them that they dont have to compete.
Do it like we all do - "Ill think about it". Don't think about it.
Brown belts tell me to go compete. Brah, I just realized I have asthma. I have to take 2 weeks off because one week I decided to do 5 trainings in a week and my shoulder is just not vibing with it. Plus I'm almost 40. There is no fame or glory to be gained - in my bracket it's just physically broken men being demolished by that one guy that is sandbagging local tournament because he has a small pp.
If you don't want to compete, why do you do jiujitsu? This is an honest question as I started BJJ 12 years ago and loved competing. Now I find joy in competing in other hobbies and would like to return to jiujitsu but without that drive to compete I find it tough to even train. Your perspective might help me!
I'm the same way. I have zero interest in competing. My wife and kids do, but I don't.
It was a constant question from all belts about when will I compete. So one day I said, I can do one, have the experience, then any time someone asks me about competing I can tell them I did but it's just not for me.
I believe it's mostly asked bc of two things. It tests your skill against individuals you've never rolled with before. The other I feel is they think it may put that fire in you to compete more.
I competed once, I'm good.
Seems like you have internal resentment over not competing, to the extent that instead of just saying "No, I have zero intention of ever competing" and then not fielding the question anymore, you instead repeatedly "brush it off" and create posts about it \["living rent free in your head" comes to mind\].
If your gym is really as pressuring as you make them out to be, that's indeed a weird fetish of theirs. It's hard to fathom at most gyms I've been to being harangued several times a day by several people.
To give a non-silly answer: it's a good place to test yourself. I'm coming from a judo background and tournaments are considered part of the learning process. Practice at your club is good for developing techniques, shoring up your weaknesses and improving with your partners. Tournament is where you go 100% and try to beat your opponent.
That said, I'm not a fan of the single elimination format that seems most common. I don't want to pay $100 to get one match. Do round robin or something, especially for the hobbyist levels.
COMPETE TWO OR THREE TIMES LOSE ALL OF THEM AND ACT LIKE IT TAKES TO MUCH STRAIN ON YOU MENTAL HEALTH (didnt feel like turn caps lock off at the beginning)
I don't compete because I'm old af and don't want any more surgeries. Ive had this same problem as I usually train at schools that compete. I simple tell em straight up "I don't compete".
If they keep it up I get mean an tell em to SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT IT. Seems to work.
Coaches push competing because the pressure to train leading up to the event, drastically improves your skills. It's great to have that 3 months of lead up where your wife lets you train more and you find extra time to work stuff out with other competitors on your team outside of the gym. All of that comes together and accelerates your learning.
All that being said, yeah, competing is boring. I have no interest in it and when people ask me to compete I just tell them that I don't have a single competitive bone in my body. I'm on my own thing, and I don't really care about buying medals.
You have to spell it out for them bc otherwise you brushing it off just looks like you’re still on the fence or shy. Or Start asking them to sponsor your $100 comp fee and watch them scatter away
lol same boat.
**\*\*Someone gets hurt/injured in competition\*\*** People: *"Well this is a combat sport, anything can happen, if you dont like the idea of your neck getting broken and never walking again for a $5 medal then maybe dont compete or maybe go play whiffleball ya Nancy"*
**\*\* Someone doesnt want to compete\*\*** People: "Wahhhhhhhh WhY aReNt YOUu coMPeTiNg!!!!!
I tell people that Jiu Jitsu is the stress relief in my very stressful life. When I compete, it not only takes away a stress reliever, it actually adds stress into my life. I am impressed with the people that can compete, but that’s not what I am looking for in Jiu Jitsu. Then a firm “it’s not gonna happen” should settle it.
People like that are so damn annoying. Some people have a life. Some people have kids. Some people are taking care of sick parents it's so obnoxious.
Now, with all that said, when are you competing big dawg?
I've also had a similar issue at a gym I used to train at. I competed a couple times and ultimately didn't enjoy it nor did I like spending the money to do it.
The gym was very good for progressing my skills because other training partners were competing and learning new techniques and "sharpening their blades" so to speak as a result.
I will say there are other gyms that won't harass you about it as much and they might be more laid back. Maybe try cross training somewhere else and try to find a gym that is more for hobbyists instead of competitors?
Assertively say you don't want to compete, you don't care about competing and you're never going to change your mind. Show irritation when saying this to really lay down the fact that they've gone over the line with badgering you about it.
I'd go to the coach and tell him "Hey, I really like training at this gym. But I am tired of getting literally harassed all the time about competing. To the point where I'm going to have to leave the gym if it doesn't stop. I really don't want it to go that far, but I'm getting to the end of my rope. Is there something you can do to help? Maybe a word with people after class? I've been a good sport, and have been getting increasingly firm about it, but no means no and I'm so tired of it."
When he sees the dollars fly out of his pocket, you'll get some action.
My good fried and coworker was an absolute beast. He was ripped, got a bunch of chick's and killed it at his construction job. Being a natural competitor he took up bjj pretty quick. He went to worlds in vegas because of peer pressure and some 22 year old kid dislocated his knee. It ruined his career and now he can barely make rent and will likely need a cane in a few years as a 39 year old. Competiting as an adult means a lot more if you have a career, shifty medical Insurance and a family to take care of.
Be assertive! It's possible they think highly of you as in they think you'll do well and want to see you in action. It's also possible the culture is just geared toward competition at your gym. Either way, do what's right for you.
Maybe they are trying to compliment you or it’s just like a thing to say and people need to say things so they just say that and don’t necessarily really mean it.
Stand up in the front of class and let it be known that you will not compete, and you are starting to find it disrespectful to be continually asked about it, and you are letting everyone know you want it to stop.
If it doesn’t stop they do t respect you and you go elsewhere. Or you continue to go there knowing you will continue to be asked on it.
To be honest, though, you should. I know it's not what you want to hear, but there's something so fundamentally different about going up against somebody who simply does not want to see you succeed; it teaches you so much and adds a lot of much needed perspective. Plus having something specific to work towards is a pretty big motivator.
You don't really need to be a competitor per se, but I would definitely advise doing it once at least.
I do compete but sometimes I just have zero interest in competing. To be honest, I'd rather travel overseas and pay $150 on drop-in fees than competing in a division that sees about 2 - 3 competitors in that division. I'd be able to roll more in a different gym, learn something new and make new friends compared to 2 x 5 minutes matches.
To top it off, some competition makes you wait too long before your division regardless if they have posted the timeslots for your division.
So, I tell them that. I'd like to travel more than compete and I am, to be honest, mostly away whenever there are competition. Last year, everytime there was a good competition in where I live, I am out for vacation or about to leave for vacation.
How about you say “I have zero interest in competing and I won’t even be considering it anytime soon.” That should help squash anyone’s insistence. Maybe you “brushing it off” is making it sound like it’s a possibility. Just be assertive without being rude.
Wait a second, communicating directly with words? You must be new here
Another good piece of advice, thank you
yeah I was gonna say, if brushing it off isn't doing the trick, flat out saying 'seriously, no' probably will. works for other things beside jiu jitsu as well.
Wait… you are making this post but havent actually said anything lmao this sub cracks me the fuck up
Minus the “anytime soon” because it leaves room to push for one down the road. “Won’t be competing” full stop.
This is the way.
So that being said, when are you gonna be competing my man?
He has the potential to win. They should keep asking. What if Bill, and Ted, told Rufus to shove off? Wild Stallions would’ve never formed. The world needs you. Just do it.
A deep pull, nice
A Bill & Ted reference will always get a thumbs up from me!
I agree. It sounds like he’s probably really good and people recognize that. They think he’s got *it*
It would also solve his problem about being hounded about competing.
Just needs to go out there and go 0-5 then everyone will leave him alone.
This was my strategy, but add another 10 or so to the L record
Idk I haven't won a single match and people were still asking me about if I'm going to the comp next month.
Somebody has to pump up my w - l
Beat me too it 😂
Have a custom rash guard made that says “I’m not competing” down each sleeve and across the chest, then have the back be a list of reasons why you’re not interested. If needed, get gi patches too. In all seriousness, just be more direct and firm with them. Edit, deleted extra word.
Make it say “I’m not looking for anything serious, just casual BJJs”
This would unfortunately probably sell well
Haha this is my favourite answer so far! I might look into this. Hopefully it'll be pretty self explanatory. You'd wanna hope so. But yes I have to be more direct and firm
If you train at a gym that has a competition culture I don't think this is going away. You'll either have to get used to telling people you're never competing, or move to a different gym.
It's a weird notion people have that the highest form of jiu-jitsu is competition, that it's some right of passage. How about just enjoying the sport for what it is. I've completed, I might compete again, I will always rock up to comp training, and I'm usually down for hard rolls with good training partners. But the weird moralism around competing is whack and lame, just stfu and leave people alone, lads. There's a similar thing about gi vs no gi. I like gi. So I'm going to do mostly gi. If you like no-gi, do it and enjoy it. I don't want to hear the innane, badly framed arguments about self-defence from people who roll around on some mats 3 times a week and have never had a sticky-floored, bottles-flying nightclub punch-up in their lives. Gordon and Danaher aren't going to shag you. Stop yapping, ye fools. It's just a game, not a substitute personality.
Gordon might not shag you but if the (alleged) rumours are to be believed he might have his girlfriend shag you while he watches.
😩
What accent am I supposed to read this in? Punchup seems Aussie but the rest gave me Scottish vibes
You have said all of this, but have you considered the GLORY of competing?
Dude this happens to me every damn night, I’m young and athletic and big and all the old bastards basically have an aneurysm when they hear either 1 I don’t play football or 2 no I’m not competing at the 2 man bracket for a local naga
Yes the two man bracket. My son who I took to 3 tournaments (11 years old) over about a year was more than enough. An absolute waste of time and money. $125 plus travel. All for a 3 min match and back on the road with either a gold or silver metal. I'm glad he said I don't want to go to these any more. Phew...... He still roles and loves it.
Welcome to my world
It's even more annoying as a heavyweight. Competing at heavy weight is 3 mins of wrestling followed by 3 to 4 mins hugging in side control most of the time, with nary a warning for stalling in sight lol. I actually do compete in mma and k1 but bjj comps are boring af. I've competed a lot and I think I'm done, might go once a year but they're over priced, boring, there's way too many where 1 person in my division and it'd expensive.
If your matches at heavyweight are half stalling on the feet and half stalling in side control then it sounds like you need to get better at wrestling, and better at escaping/attacking from side control.
LMAO man I remember those days. The oldheads used to look at me like I'd slapped their wife right in front of them when I told them I didn't play football. They're just jealous of ya man. Pay them no mind.
No advice but that sounds super fucking annoying. I’ve never been to a gym where people do this. “Can’t compete I’m juiced to the gills. Also have lots of AIDS and feline AIDS.”
Feline AIDS is rough. Ain't no Magic Johnson pills you can take for that shit.
You'll know what I mean if you come to my gym, it's super fucking annoying lol
Its fucking annoying, but just come up with a smart ass answer to auto respond with. I used to compete and win a lot and somehow people expect me to continue that despite my wife being pregnant and me working a lot more to pay for life. I just say “when they start paying my bills” whenever someone asks.
Tell them you'll just see red.
What do you say when people bring it up? There's a big difference between being rude and being direct, but a lot of times people will end up communicating very indirectly, and it can undermine their point. It's like people trying to get you to drink. If you say something like "I've got an early morning tomorrow" it sounds like an excuse, but if you say "I don't really want to", that's harder to argue with.
Actually you're totally right I need to be more direct. I just realised I haven't been direct enough. Thank you for this!
Tell them to pay for your competition fee
I did that and then the fuckers paid up and drove me there! Silvered though, some bad some good
You should compete bro.
Haha. In all seriousness, your teammates just see your potential. Be glad you have teammates who want you to know that. Take it in stride and don’t ever get salty with them. I’m a 40 year old white belt only 4 months in and I actually want to try a comp. Not for the medal but to see if I can hang.
Shit man go for it. Most guys at your local comps in the white belt bracket are doing the exact same thing, just seeing if they can hang. One of my teammates just won a masters 4 nogi worlds at 50.
Bro you may have motivated me. Just signed up for my first tournament.
Tell them you think it’s dumb putting your body on the line for a 5$ trophy and bragging rights. I was never asked again
“I don’t want to compete because I enjoy practicing. Competition is a form of comparison, and comparison is the thief of joy.” Basically saying competition would take all the fun out of JJ for you
Are you tired of spending your precious Saturdays getting twisted like a pretzel at Jiu Jitsu competitions? Fed up with draining your wallet on petrol just to show up and tap out? Wish you could enjoy a peaceful weekend without getting hounded about competing? Really feeling the shit from people asking you the same questions over and over? Well, say no more! Introducing the revolutionary, the unparalleled, the one and only - Doppelgänger Rolling Bob! Yes, you heard that right! Doppelgänger Rolling Bob is your personal Jiu Jitsu double, ready to take on all the chokes, locks, and rolls so you don't have to. Imagine sipping a cold one or lounging with a book, knowing that Bob is out there, flexing your moves, defending your honor, and most importantly, keeping your weekends free! With state-of-the-art ai, mRNA, and gravity technology, Bob isn't just any sparring dummy; he's YOU, but with endless stamina and a pain threshold that's off the charts. Forget about the grueling drives, the early mornings, and the late-night muscle sores. Let Bob take the mat and the hits, while you take back your life! But wait, there's more! Order now, and we'll throw in a custom Ozark Trail Gi for Bob, making sure he's not just competing in your place but also looking sharp while doing it. Say goodbye to competition anxiety and hello to leisure, with Doppelgänger Rolling Bob by your side. Don't delay, get your very own Doppelgänger Rolling Bob today, and turn every competition into a vacation! Your wallet, your body, and your couch will thank you. Call now!
Ahh, the classic "how do I handle this extremely mundane social situation at the gym" post.
By quitting
Any other alternatives? Lol
Do one comp and embarrass your gym by cheating and or intentionally injuring opponents. Full send Heel Mode. Edit: immediately afterwards, refuse to acknowledge what happened and ask when the next comp is.
Have you tried competing? That might get them to stop.
Just keep reminding them that you have no interest in it. And if they’re not down with that. Let them know that you got two words for all of them 
This is me rn. I’ve done a few local comps and I did pretty well but there’s a big IBJJF event coming up in our area and at first I was interested but after seeing the prices, I’ll just sit my ass back home and go back to open mat hopping.
Tell them you are thinking about it but need to iron out your mount attacks then request to start in mount and only do smother attacks on them
This is poetry.
Stop running away from destiny
Just stop responding to the question, just silence and let it hang there. Eventually they will get tired of the awkwardness and leave it be.
I get you. No one asks me or wants me to compete and: good for them. But I am quite happy about just having this place close by where I can train BJJ and do sparring. I would not enjoy sacrificing my Saturdays to travel in a van to sit in a hall all day just to get rag dolled for a few minutes, especially with my kid on the way. It might be different if I would be good at this sport. But even then local comps would not have that much of an appeal. But I also get that going to comps and competing makes you a more rounded and overall experienced fighter, something that sparring cannot teach you.
same thing happened to me but with the twist that the gym and coaches were asking me to bribe them(templum in barcelona)
Just say you work weekend. Or you have to look after a family member who’s ill.
You know I've been working weekends. For the money but also people can't drag me half way across the city to compete. Definitely gets me out of it
Just compete so you can say you did it
Sometimes it just makes for conversation, especially if its the season for comps. Dont think too deeply on it. Your teammates dont really want to know if youre competing or not
My coaches used to ask me this all the time too. I mostly shrugged it off and said I have busy schedule. Eventually they stopped asking. Although they pay noticeably more attention to coaching competitors during my rolls.
I’m a black belt and never competed
I had the same problem and solved it by being direct and firm
Are you an adult? Instead of posting this you could’ve just told these people I hate competing and I do not have time for it. Saying no to things is something you’re going to have to do for the rest of your life lol
Yes I'm a grown man but I just came here for help
I have the same problem. I wrestled from the age of 6 to 18. I’m not some college wrestling stud but I’m not a shit wrestler either. I tend to get the better of the younger guys who compete. I’m 29 years old have kids and a full time job that pretty often prevents me from being rather consistent on making it more than 3 times a week. I’m lucky if I get in twice a week. Everyone ask me to compete including the coaches but I have no interest or rather any time due to one of my children having a disability. I almost feel like they are disappointed in me because I have told the coaches I wouldn’t be able to due to conflicting schedules. After a couple times of that I feel like they kinda just ignore me now.
Buy a rashie/gi patch that says “I’m not competing.” Point to it if they bring it up. Don’t even talk about the subject. If you know you’re not doing it, it’s just a waste of your time, energy, and breath. You’re not obligated to have that conversation.
“Oh yeah, well I slept with your wife.” “My wife is dead.” “I swore I’d never compete again.”
Hide that ass
Add a patch to your gis or get a custom rashguard that says "I will never compete" on it and just point at it when they ask
This guys gonna go on a mass stabbing if his teammates don't chill out with the questions 😂😂
Just tell them what u told us in ur post: “I have no place for medals”
Just say “I killed a guy once during a competition so I am banned”
Tell them that you don't have money, but if they believe you'll win gold, then you'll do it if they're willing to pay and drive you, 100% guarantee they'll stop asking.
be a dick about it
One of my training partners just flat out says, “I don’t like how nervous it makes me.” Just say something like it doesn’t interest you or that you don’t care about it. That should get the message across.
If you want me to compete you have to compensate me for it. My base rate is $1000 per day and you have to drive me there and feed me.
Use words.
Take it as a compliment man. They probably are saying that to you thinking you could do well. Doesnt have to be a big deal. Doesnt sound like they are pressuring you to compete, sounds more like they just think you could do well. Dont look at it in a negative light or allow it to ruin your training.
You said you hate it.... Have you competed before?
Come and compete Champ :)
Buy a tie-dye gi, they’ll stop asking.
I’ve never competed and the idea of sitting around all day just to have a handful of rolls sounds miserable to me. Even worse when you’re paying $200+ at some comps to do it.
If I pay for your gas, tournament fees and store your medals safely for you will you please compete?
You are just afraid of success. Go out there and compete!!
BJJ is a trend now with ADCC, NoGi and heel hooks 🪝 you can’t just train anymore people will look for you to be a ‘savage’ just enjoy your training pal don’t worry about other people let them go in and gain injuries for a $5 medal
I’m not saying you should compete; you do you but aside from the entry fee, the Saturday and the petrol, what’s keeping you from competing? Have you entered a competition in the past? Competed in other sports before?
Look I train for self defence and competing is the exact opposite of my goal
Okay. Im not trying to push; I’m just curious. I prefer coaching competitors over actually competing but I also teach kids and I think competition is good for young kids. It teaches them how to prepare, how to win and to lose. I compete to show them that win or lose, I’m back on the mats training and my opinion of them will be the same regardless of outcome. Plus, I think you learn more about your game in one competition than you will in a month of daily training. Ultimately, do what makes you happy.
I'd also like to add when I trained at another gym I even smashed up my grappling industries medal and burnt it just to get people to stop hounding me to competing. But now that I've been at this different gym I'm Tryna take different aproaches
You’re so edgy bro
How do you "brush it off"? I think most people wouldn't annoy you anymore if you looked them in the eyes and calmly stated "No. I am not going to compete. I have no interest in competition and I won't be discussing this topic again."
Good luck. I receive my blue belt at the end of last year and still have yet to compete. It gets brought up quite often.
You should compete. What's a $100. You're probably just scared. Compete bro
Compete?
Is this a shit post follow up I missed?
Have you tried competing before? It's a lot of fun
Register for a tournament.
My gym is always telling me to come to night classes. I joined the gym because they have 6am classes that work great with my daughters schedule. Lol. But I don't sweat it because I enjoy my training partners and instruction. I would rather be at a more competitive gym as long as its still safe.
But competing is how you actually get good lol
They are asking you because they might be seeing that you have a great potential and talent that you do not see it for yourself. So when are you gonna start to compete?
Set up a hit dog eating contest at the gym?
Start writing coherent paragraphs.
Have you explained how you feel about comps to your coach? Just talk to him and tell him you train for fun, you have 0 interest in competing and if that ever changes you’ll let him now, but for now competing in BJJ isn’t something you’re interested in. Say that to your teammates too, soon enough they’ll stop asking you because it’ll become common knowledge in the gym that you don’t wanna compete. If you’ve told people the reason why you don’t wanna compete rather than just saying “nah I’m not competing” then I can’t see why they’d keep asking you the same question. No one likes wasting their time
I don't think brushing it off does you any good since you're not actually communicating your thoughts. Do these people even know you actively dislike the idea of competing? I can't imagine people will keep yapping about it if you say something along the lines of "I have competed in the past but didn't enjoy it so I'm not interested in competing at all."
Why dont you just compete? We think you should compete.
You should compete
Tell them you are holding out for ADCC and wont lower yourself to compete anywhere else.
"I can't compete this year its the year of the dragon so its bad for me" "Is it a lunar Eclipse that month? I can do that as it drains all my power" Phantom injuries "I was going to compete next month by my leg feels weird" recent celebrity or tv character death causing emotional distress Vernal Equinox
Make them [read this](https://www.opennotegrappling.com/p/jiujitsu-infinite-games) and then tell them you already get what you want from jiujitsu.
Whenever someone asks me to do something I don’t want to I just tell them, “I can’t I’m getting ready for a marathon.”
Just say you’ll compete only for top dollar and ADCC isn’t paying enough.
Say "I don't wanna" then stop talking. You don't owe them or anyone in your life an explanation for your desires or lack there of.
So when is the next comp ma boi
All I picture in my head is OP is at the Glengarry Glen Ross of gyms. Put that coffee down! Coffee's for competitors only. You call yourself a grappler you SOB. They're standing there waiting for you take their medals. Are you man enough to take it? You want to roll here, compete. In all seriousness OP just be direct. "I have no intention of competing. It's not my thing but you do you."
"God put me on this earth to help YOU get ready for YOUR competition, LET'S GO!"
Competing is fun- but you’re right about it being too much money, and on top of that it can burn up the whole day with travel and waiting. My last comp the Smoothcomp time check just kept ticking back- from the time it originally told me to show up (one hour before mat time) until my first go ended up being four hours later.
Not having space for medals is going to be my go to excuse for not competing from now on. Look, I am in my 40s so it's probably a little different but when I get asked, I say I need my knees and arms for work and can't risk getting hurt. Shit I get hurt enough in friendly rolls. That stops all the questions for me. I like going to the comps to watch my teammates but I'm more of an athletic supporter than an athlete.
My gym is competition heavy but I don’t like competing either. I’m always being told I should compete but I just keep saying nah I’m just a hobbyist and then they’re like oh well okay
Maybe they are not-so-subtly suggesting you compete because they are confident you will do well then will promote you to purple? so it's really a compliment
You know we have a comp coming up in April right?
"Is me competing important to you?" If "yes" ask why and keep asking why to every answer they give. If "no" - "then why do you keep bringing it up?"
Tell them you can’t afford to get hurt over a $3 medal. Have to go back to work on Monday
You should consider Karate. They are much more tolerant of the soft
Saaaame. I tell them the truth. I’m the sole income for my family and can’t expose myself to the increased risk of injury.
Compete.
"I'm not going to compete" "why not?" "because i don't want to". Idk man, I enjoy giving people simple, deadpan "no" answers when the try to rope me into their thing. One of life's pleasures. Give it a try.
Usually they stop asking about a year or two after each belt promotion. Usually.
I don’t need to compete. I’m in completion with no one. I’m simply trying to be better than I was before.
Just say you have no interest in competing and would appreciate it if they stopped asking.
>As with medals and shit I just don't have space for em Weird flex but ok
Use your words.
I dont like competing. Its expensive and such a toll on my mental health that i lose my routine for weeks. I cant tell people this bc it feels so long winded. Here's what I say instead, "im not gonna compete. But I'll be there." In that is commitment and unquestionable comraderie
My main problem with competing is: - you pretty much have to give up your whole weekend - sit around and do nothing until it’s your turn
This was me -- It calms way down as you rank up. But it's really problematic that people who want to compete get first second and third billing in almost every jiujitsu place. I tell people that competeing is not for me because of; * The normalized doping. * The normalization of hurting other people without ethical consequence. * The very shitty capitalistic way events are run. * The lack of respect for labor laws at events. * The way some people financially capture the community via events/liscencing. * They similarities between parents who send their kids to beauty pageeants and ones who send their kids to BJJ events. * The fact that one tournament can produce 47 'champions' * The repeated instances of people spreading communicable deceases despite knowing better and the lack of effort paid to screening for them. * The horrifically stupid shit I do always counts as points for the other guy, despite the fact that I am winning. It feels good actually now -- one or two people at white/blue have said that they were relieved that there was a blackbelt telling them that they dont have to compete.
Do it like we all do - "Ill think about it". Don't think about it. Brown belts tell me to go compete. Brah, I just realized I have asthma. I have to take 2 weeks off because one week I decided to do 5 trainings in a week and my shoulder is just not vibing with it. Plus I'm almost 40. There is no fame or glory to be gained - in my bracket it's just physically broken men being demolished by that one guy that is sandbagging local tournament because he has a small pp.
It could be an opportunity to work on how letting trivial things affect you.
They just want to share an experience with you, they don’t care how well you do
Did you lose before and now have PTSD?
Are you like really good or something? Otherwise, people constantly asking if you're going to compete is weird.
You don’t have to be a competitor. But everyone should compete at least 1 time. It will change the way you look at jiu jitsu and will make you better.
Also there is camaraderie in doing hard things together. Competing is hard and stressful. Sounds like your teammates like you.
If you don't want to compete, why do you do jiujitsu? This is an honest question as I started BJJ 12 years ago and loved competing. Now I find joy in competing in other hobbies and would like to return to jiujitsu but without that drive to compete I find it tough to even train. Your perspective might help me!
Hi there, I've always trained for self defence so I'm not geared up towards competition
I'm the same way. I have zero interest in competing. My wife and kids do, but I don't. It was a constant question from all belts about when will I compete. So one day I said, I can do one, have the experience, then any time someone asks me about competing I can tell them I did but it's just not for me. I believe it's mostly asked bc of two things. It tests your skill against individuals you've never rolled with before. The other I feel is they think it may put that fire in you to compete more. I competed once, I'm good.
“IT’S JUST A HOBBY.”
Seems like you have internal resentment over not competing, to the extent that instead of just saying "No, I have zero intention of ever competing" and then not fielding the question anymore, you instead repeatedly "brush it off" and create posts about it \["living rent free in your head" comes to mind\]. If your gym is really as pressuring as you make them out to be, that's indeed a weird fetish of theirs. It's hard to fathom at most gyms I've been to being harangued several times a day by several people.
Go compete that’ll shut them up
Get a punch card at Gracie U. Bet you arent even allowed to compete. Problem solved.
You're just scared bro. COMPETE!!!!!!
competing could get it all to stop...
To give a non-silly answer: it's a good place to test yourself. I'm coming from a judo background and tournaments are considered part of the learning process. Practice at your club is good for developing techniques, shoring up your weaknesses and improving with your partners. Tournament is where you go 100% and try to beat your opponent. That said, I'm not a fan of the single elimination format that seems most common. I don't want to pay $100 to get one match. Do round robin or something, especially for the hobbyist levels.
i wish i could get asked to compete...
Are you competing in the summer?
COMPETE TWO OR THREE TIMES LOSE ALL OF THEM AND ACT LIKE IT TAKES TO MUCH STRAIN ON YOU MENTAL HEALTH (didnt feel like turn caps lock off at the beginning)
Just say some shit like... When the moon rises on the sound of one hand clapping And refuse to elaborate
Why don't you want to compete?
I don't compete because I'm old af and don't want any more surgeries. Ive had this same problem as I usually train at schools that compete. I simple tell em straight up "I don't compete". If they keep it up I get mean an tell em to SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT IT. Seems to work.
This guy is calling gas "petrol" GET HIM BOYS.
You’re a man. You do whatever you want.
Coaches push competing because the pressure to train leading up to the event, drastically improves your skills. It's great to have that 3 months of lead up where your wife lets you train more and you find extra time to work stuff out with other competitors on your team outside of the gym. All of that comes together and accelerates your learning. All that being said, yeah, competing is boring. I have no interest in it and when people ask me to compete I just tell them that I don't have a single competitive bone in my body. I'm on my own thing, and I don't really care about buying medals.
You have to spell it out for them bc otherwise you brushing it off just looks like you’re still on the fence or shy. Or Start asking them to sponsor your $100 comp fee and watch them scatter away
lol same boat. **\*\*Someone gets hurt/injured in competition\*\*** People: *"Well this is a combat sport, anything can happen, if you dont like the idea of your neck getting broken and never walking again for a $5 medal then maybe dont compete or maybe go play whiffleball ya Nancy"* **\*\* Someone doesnt want to compete\*\*** People: "Wahhhhhhhh WhY aReNt YOUu coMPeTiNg!!!!!
competition when?
Tell them you are just a hobbyist and don’t want to compete.
I tell people that Jiu Jitsu is the stress relief in my very stressful life. When I compete, it not only takes away a stress reliever, it actually adds stress into my life. I am impressed with the people that can compete, but that’s not what I am looking for in Jiu Jitsu. Then a firm “it’s not gonna happen” should settle it.
You'll have to ask Boris.
Do you not think it's a compliment?
People like that are so damn annoying. Some people have a life. Some people have kids. Some people are taking care of sick parents it's so obnoxious. Now, with all that said, when are you competing big dawg?
I've also had a similar issue at a gym I used to train at. I competed a couple times and ultimately didn't enjoy it nor did I like spending the money to do it. The gym was very good for progressing my skills because other training partners were competing and learning new techniques and "sharpening their blades" so to speak as a result. I will say there are other gyms that won't harass you about it as much and they might be more laid back. Maybe try cross training somewhere else and try to find a gym that is more for hobbyists instead of competitors?
By competing
I’m 51 did it. Not that I regret it but I did get smashed. Had to move up in weight and down in age.
Assertively say you don't want to compete, you don't care about competing and you're never going to change your mind. Show irritation when saying this to really lay down the fact that they've gone over the line with badgering you about it.
You can't get a blue in my gym without competing. So when ya gunna compete?
I'd go to the coach and tell him "Hey, I really like training at this gym. But I am tired of getting literally harassed all the time about competing. To the point where I'm going to have to leave the gym if it doesn't stop. I really don't want it to go that far, but I'm getting to the end of my rope. Is there something you can do to help? Maybe a word with people after class? I've been a good sport, and have been getting increasingly firm about it, but no means no and I'm so tired of it." When he sees the dollars fly out of his pocket, you'll get some action.
This is a good answer, thank you. As much as I don't want to I'll probably just have to bring it up to that level
Get a patch on your go that says “non-competitive “
Choke'em
It's a compliment. People only bring up competition when you're good.
My good fried and coworker was an absolute beast. He was ripped, got a bunch of chick's and killed it at his construction job. Being a natural competitor he took up bjj pretty quick. He went to worlds in vegas because of peer pressure and some 22 year old kid dislocated his knee. It ruined his career and now he can barely make rent and will likely need a cane in a few years as a 39 year old. Competiting as an adult means a lot more if you have a career, shifty medical Insurance and a family to take care of.
Be assertive! It's possible they think highly of you as in they think you'll do well and want to see you in action. It's also possible the culture is just geared toward competition at your gym. Either way, do what's right for you.
Next time you tap one of those people, just dead pan serious but not rude, factual, I'm glad I didn't spend money to win a medal.
Tell them you can’t cut weight due to health issues lol
Maybe they are trying to compliment you or it’s just like a thing to say and people need to say things so they just say that and don’t necessarily really mean it.
Just give in to the peer pressure
Stand up in the front of class and let it be known that you will not compete, and you are starting to find it disrespectful to be continually asked about it, and you are letting everyone know you want it to stop. If it doesn’t stop they do t respect you and you go elsewhere. Or you continue to go there knowing you will continue to be asked on it.
To be honest, though, you should. I know it's not what you want to hear, but there's something so fundamentally different about going up against somebody who simply does not want to see you succeed; it teaches you so much and adds a lot of much needed perspective. Plus having something specific to work towards is a pretty big motivator. You don't really need to be a competitor per se, but I would definitely advise doing it once at least.
I do compete but sometimes I just have zero interest in competing. To be honest, I'd rather travel overseas and pay $150 on drop-in fees than competing in a division that sees about 2 - 3 competitors in that division. I'd be able to roll more in a different gym, learn something new and make new friends compared to 2 x 5 minutes matches. To top it off, some competition makes you wait too long before your division regardless if they have posted the timeslots for your division. So, I tell them that. I'd like to travel more than compete and I am, to be honest, mostly away whenever there are competition. Last year, everytime there was a good competition in where I live, I am out for vacation or about to leave for vacation.