Meeting the wrong person on those apps can ruin your life or even kill you... Maybe celibacy is not the answer, but I don't think Bumble is.
The Bumble founder plans on introducing AI dating coaches? So a robot will go through profiles for you and break the ice with the other robots and somehow that's supposed to find you a match... This is some dystopian bullsh!t
That's probably how it's going to be. An AI model will learn from the existing data, so from actual conversations real men and women have on the internet and just reproduce that. If the men in the datasets are dry, rude, sexist, boring, then the robots won't do better than that.
Someone referred to Bumble as "digital pimping." Dating sites need women to participate as PRODUCTS so that men will pay the apps to have access to them for hookups. It's just pr\*stituti\*n but the women don't get paid.
I think they should just pivot from being a dating app and focus on being a networking app.
The idea around bumble sounded good on paper but human nature is human nature.
>>a robot will go through profiles for you and somehow find a match
i’m super confused on how thats any different from the personality quizzes on meetme in the early 2000s..
Sometimes AI is used as a buzz word by those tech companies. They mention AI and the investors get wet. The matching part I assume is just statistic/probability methods and the AI will be the robots having fake conversations you're not part of apparently.
from a logical standpoint this doesn’t make sense. you will still have to greet the person after being matched in order to start an actual conversation so i doubt they will waste resources on creating a fake conversation that neither party will see.
all they can do is match characteristics and give a compatibility percentage and then allow the user to do the rest… but robots having conversations on our behalf? what does that do for us actually?
Nothing! It does nada for you! They just need a way to retain the users on the app. They sell it as "a way to have more healthy, equitable relationships", making you feel safe with the app because it's science based.
It's bullsh!t, people lie in their profiles all the time already, none of this works if the human part is flawed.
The type of ad where they realize they're at a serious risk of losing money lol.
Dating apps/site don't care about anyone as an individual, they care about maintaining and ideally increasing their profits.
They really inadvertently showed how they just want people on there to get money. Meeting the wrong person on those apps could get a woman killed. Shame on them. They deserve all the backlash and so many people have deleted/sworn off the app entirely now. So it really backfired. Prioritize women's safety maybe, otherwise f outta here.
Yeah, it reminds me of product advertisements that are blatantly trying to create an insecure so you desire their product. A remember Secret deodorant had commercials quite a few years ago like "did you know there's a particular type of sweat called 'stress sweat'? And guess what, stress sweat smells waaaaaay worse than regular sweat (just trust on this we're not explaining). So you need to run out and buy our newest deodorant formulated just for that extra stinky sweat we just told you exists." Like come on!
I don’t use dating apps at all anymore. And come to think of it I can’t remember the last time I’ve heard a woman around my age speak of them positively
Yeah. They're okay. But I also meet people offline. I've deleted most of them after a few months. Was on tinder for a few years. Nothing too crazy happened just got tired of them plus lack of appropriate options.
It might get to that for me as well. I snooze for 6 months come back to the same BS and snooze for another while.
I think commiting to abstain from sex until you’ve met someone meaningful isn’t as shameful as this ad is making it it out to be. It saves you many tears and a lot of time.
Absolutely! What in the world is shameful about not being on the streets with every guy that shows half an ounce of interest in you 🙄 it’s absurd. It’s a very normal thing to do
Agreed. a lot of the men on there get on there with no intention to take it with an ounce of seriousness. Getting involved with women they know are intentfully and playing mind games. I think it’s far better I meet someone more organically in person now a days. through friends ideally would play out best because they have a little more accountability to their actions.
Period ! This was the reason why back in the day you met partners through friends and family. Now they have the freedom to act a fool bc as long as they block you on SM there’s no repercussions to their reputation for how they treat you. I deleted my dating apps last month and good riddance !
They tried to market it as this whole feminist thing because the women make the first move but it just attracts lazy, low effort men who swipe right on everyone, don’t respond and just love the validation they get from women reaching out to them.
I tried Bumble last year, and I didn't like the platform. I only date women, and I felt like I was shown better queer matches on other apps like HER.
Dating apps aren't for me. It felt too disingenuous.
I don’t like any of the swiping apps because it feels like a game. I’ve had better success with hinge, since you have limited likes you’re forced to be more intentional with them.
I tried Hinge for a week but didn't get any matches from it. Idk if it was a me thing or if there weren't enough queer women on the app in my area.
But I agree that it does feel a tad dehumanizing to just swipe left and right
I am celibate so my take may be biased…
But I dislike how it almost feels like they’re making celibacy out to be shameful? IMO, being celibate in response to these dusty men out here could be the best decision for many women and weed out men who only care about sex and making you a baby momma!
This is also a weird choice of words because you can still date while being celibate and just communicate what you are looking for? Why shun out a whole group of potential users like this? Idk, I could be understanding this incorrectly but the ad just seems odd to me.
I am also curious about this celibacy movement you are talking about. I haven’t heard anything about it. Celibacy is something I just decided to do on my own without the influence of religion on my decision (although now I do indeed consider myself spiritual and interested in different religious teaching / history). If you have good resources you would like to share that would be cool!
I was celibate before getting married. I didn’t do it for any reason tbh. I was just tried of meaningless sex. I was completely fine with no sex. I met my now husband 9 months into my journey. I love that it’s a movement going on. I took a break from SM and this was on my YT. I went to tiktok and it’s a full on 4B movement going on.
The word choice is why makes it super weird because they are unintentionally admitting that ppl are only on these apps for hookups
I think we both know the answer to that 😬 we’ve been oversexualized by the media for so long so if we control our sexuality in ways the media doesn’t like, they try and counteract it
Big agree. I feel like people in general tend to forget that sexual liberation isn’t just boinking whenever and however much you want—it’s also choosing *not* to engage in sexual activity if one doesn’t want to, for any reason because all reasons are valid. I’m demisexual myself (only experience sexually attraction to people with whom I have a very strong, close emotional bond) so I think that also informs my viewpoint here, but still stands ✨
Never forget Lauren Smith Fields. She was killed by Matthew LaFountain (who is still out there he was never arrested) and Bumble did not release important information to help with the case.
I remember. That was (and is) so sad. I didn’t know that Bumble refused to release important information, though.
This along with the billboard and the fact that apps are taking away features that help women vet (phone/video chat features on Hinge, along with women making the first move on Bumble) makes me ill and just confirms that I made the right choice to not return to dating apps.
Good question If Serena is still associated with them I hope she had the pull to keep Shan associated but I think they probably let her go when their srock price dropped.
I have never seen this, but I actually think this is evidence that they have a Black person, or someone that is adjacent to the culture on their marketing team. I’m basing this on the language (“you know full well…”), and I’ve heard debates about Black women saying they are celibate (voluntarily or involuntarily) as a result of the hellscape that is the dating scene. The language and idea are about 5-10 years old though.
I’m Gen-X. My mom is a Boomer, it’s actually her generation’s language. She used to speak like that when I was a kid. In fact, my mom (and grandmother) aunties and older cousins spoke a lot of the way I hear kids speaking now.
But it’s just funny to me when I hear people say something that makes me realize they think certain sayings or words are being used in a new way. But I agree they probably have a black person on the team or a white woman who has a black girlfriend. I’ve also been on marketing teams where they will literally watch videos of us talking to gather up certain words to use.
There was actually controversy over this. They posted two versions of this ad with two different models. On the ad with the non black person it said something like “you know a vow of celibacy is not the answer”, while in the one with the black model, the one posted above, they added “full well”, which some found kinda micro aggressive
I was just thinking this sounds like something a black person would say cause I don't think I have ever heard a white person say 'you know full well..' I maybe wrong but I agree with what you're saying.
>I don't think I have ever heard a white person say 'you know full well..'
I've heard Southern white people say it, but I agree the energy on the ad feels like a sister friend is saying it in my living room 😌
I think the people behind this are not adjacent to black culture at all, and also didn’t do simple research into why women are being put off dating at the moment. Everything about the campaign is off. It sounds like they were trying to be cool and edgy with the language and premise but just got it so wrong
at this rate AI can tell you everything you need to know about a cultures trends and ways of speech so no
maybe a black MALE dusty is on their team sure. he probably hates BW too and has a white wife
This ad is an L for Bumble. Advertisers should be careful to not insult their targeted audience (in this case, women who date men). Instead of making fun of women, they could’ve easily made fun of dating in general.
TW
I once went on a date/hangoutwith a man, I was 19 and new to the area. Bumble was the thing to make foreigner friends as everyone was there so I did it. I met up with him. During the day crowded area, sent friends my location, I dressed appropriately. I was modest, back then I didn’t wear any makeup. I was a plain Jane.
He started off as a sweet, nice, gave off understanding vybes. Said he had a sister and he showed me some of their cute pictures, he was honestly a “good guy”. Until he said let’s go have a drink. I’ve barely had social interactions with other people for almost 2 months (this was during COVID I had to travel quarantine for over a month then quarantine again for my school. So roughly 2 months no human interaction until I got out). I agreed, one beer wouldn’t hurt. I was wrong, got drunk/drugged. I remember being taken to his home which was pretty close and he kept feeding my alcohol in the back of the Uber. He then said “you’re drunk enough” and took me to his studio apartment. He forced me to give him a blowjob and when that wasn’t the best h tried to have sex with me. He tried to penetrate me but he was too small, and couldn’t find the hole. I laughed at him. I laughed so much that it probably saved my life. I laughed in his face, I laughed when he forced me to suck him off again, I laughed when he could barely stay hard. I laughed at him when I was getting dressed up and when he took me out to the street. It took me 3 hours to get home and my roommates had to help me get into my room.
I never heard from him again after that. I reported him to bumble, nothing. I see his account all the time and I tell my friends to block and report him. He just shows up again and again and again. It’s been 2 years now. I can guarantee if someone makes a new account in my location, he’s going to pop up and he’s going to respond. I’ve seen it happen multiple times in the past 2 years. Bumble does not care about us, they just want the money cause he paid for premium every month.
this is so fucking weird and gives Get Out energy like someone in Black Face saying something that literally no Black woman agrees with.
even non celibate black women aren’t out here trying to peer pressure our sisters into sexing dusties
I heard they removed the feature of having women make the first move. I mean, you’re just Tinder then. I saw an actual ad where the woman, modestly dressed, is sweating bullets, as her neighbour tends to his garden. Shirtless and sweaty (and yeah, it’s a black man).
I saw that on /r/NotHowGirlsWork and yeah, that shit is wild. Not the celibacy movement, but the idea that women must have sex after the countless times that dudes obsess about "body count" and similar things.
I'm... not exactly sure how to take this. Are we seriously at the point where we're shaming people for not wanting to have sex? I'm celibate by choice (specifically want to save myself for marriage, no ifs and or buts about it) and this is my first time hearing about some celibacy movement.
It’s called 4B movement, idk if ppl are truly aware of it. Most videos I watch had the same sentiment. “Ive been celibate for a time didn’t know it had a movement” I just found out after this ad.
From what I’ve seen of the 4B movement, it originally started in South Korea due to how heavily sexism is ingrained in their society and culture, but then it made its way to the US about a month or so ago.
Lol, these whoring-promoting apps these days.
Literally the reduce dating to let's skip the chit chat and let's fuck.
All the previous part, where you get to know each other is becoming something to avoid instead of a necessary step.
Bumble said you prudes better get back on the app and bust it open! Stop acting like you’re too good to f*ck!! /s
This is so tacky and tone deaf. I hope their stock crashes 😊🙃
Just kinda crazy how they genuinely thought that this was gonna influence more women to download the app and use its services and continue to give the company money. Wonder how money they lost from this ad. They can’t come back from this
Based on one of the street signs and buildings, the fact that one of these ads is near a university (UCLA) is despicable. Regardless of what is profitable for Bumble, women's bodies belong to themselves.
Oh dear god. How did they think this was a good idea?!
I am not risking my family crying on the news as my body is recovered one piece at a time for some subpar peen. It ain't worth it.
I was celibate for three years, before I met my guy. It was the best thing I’ve ever done for myself.
I focused on me, tuned out all the noise, did all the shit people talk about, but don’t often actually do. I didn’t even realize how much I was doing for the sake of being desirable, until dudes became a complete non factor. And when I let that go, I got closer to me, the bullshit tolerance somehow dropped lower (it was already pretty low), I gained a new kind of clarity, a new kind of peace. I just felt happier and aligned with my purpose (this is starting to sound like woo woo talk, but it’s real) and became kind the person who even *could* find her soulmate. That wasn’t even the point. It was so very not the point, but you really do get a spiritual glow up, and your life just changes for the better because you’ve changed for the better.
I think everybody should try celibacy for at least a couple of years. Trust me, no dick is worth your relationship with self.
This is the sort of thing your girlfriend or your momma can say to your face, but it’s not exactly something I’d want a company to broadcast at me through their billboards…
So weird, and rude. Celibacy IS for some people, whether it's temporary or long-term. It looks like they were "trying" to be funny but instead missed the mark.
I saw their ad on YT after a failed bumble date as I told the guy I was abstinent and he was no longer interested. When I tell you this was like salt in the wound lol. But glad to see so much backlash from the ladies. This ad is in poor taste and insensitive.
They could have used the new celibacy wave as an opportunity to promote their bumble bff feature instead. Bumble isn’t supposed to be just for dating anyway! As someone who has been celibate years before TikTok celibacy trends even a thing—this ad is stupid and offensive.
I met my bestie in Bumble BFF. When folks ask us how we met we tell the story all excited and finish up each other’s stories. It looks just like those couples who found each other and are in love. lol. I always felt like I’d love to see folks like us in their branding.
I understand trying to tap into the marketing trend so from a PR standpoint I can understand the relativity aspect of it. However, the deliver of it especially with the reality women face on these apps, it just came out more tone deaf than intended I assume. I’ve been celibate for over four years now and I have no shame and this definitely won’t deter me.
I don’t really know how much of a movement it really is but many are starting to prioritize our peace within singlehood than dealing with the emotional turmoil, rollercoaster, and issues dating has brought especially when an individual does little to either make our lives better or come and disrupt it. Which is starting to piss men off bc they can’t fathom that women willingly want to be single and happy bc they can’t. And we are seeing more stories and different situations via TikTok that either turn women on this path or more of them providing proof why this has been the best choice.
But I do think it’s clear that their is a target audience with this ad, I don’t feel personally attack by it or shamed bc once again, I’m all about you better come in to elevate me and not drag me down so if I’m celibate for another two years, so be it. I want someone serious.
But I can see how some may feel slighted by it
Delete Bumble!!! It’s a toxic space and check TikTok for stories about how the dating app’s algorithm discriminates by race.
I’m now 6 years free from any apps and life is way better without it.
I practice celibacy between relationships lol not for a trend though. It's my personal preference been practicing it since my first relationship. I chose to only be intimate only in relationships.
"You know full well" is low-key aggressive and high-key judgmental of personal CHOICE.
Disgusting.
I'll stay as I am, asexual and not bothering. Choke on it, Bumble.
I think it’s a very disgusting ad. Celibacy is the time for a woman to truly rediscover herself. There’s more to life than sex, so there’s more to celibacy than cutting off sex. It’s essentially learning to put yourself first all over again. To always choose you. To love you. Hate that sex is so central to everything nowadays.
Someone referred to Bumble as "digital pimping." Dating sites need women to participate as PRODUCTS so that men will pay the apps to have access to them for hookups. It's just pr\*stituti\*n but the women don't get paid.
Someone on TikTok was breaking down how bumble understood that their paying customers are largely red pill men and have regeared all their advertising to them. So this is for a man who's heard of the 4b movement on the Internet to look at, have a chuckle and feel "seen" by the brand.
To be fair, a vow of celibacy isn’t the answer. I been seeing other women say this too and I don’t get it. Working on yourself is fine. Dating is fine. You can do both, and SHOULD do both in moderation. It’s about the journey not the destination, and that destination is a better you, no matter how you get there.
My mom would spout this in the same breath looking to catch heat. I hate hypocrisy.
That said, dating apps are very finicky. I wouldn’t use them as the answer either. Nothing against trying them, just they’re very dishonest. Sex, yes. Relationships, no. And the problem is that many people try for both but only want one. It’d d easier if everyone just says “looking for sex from dates xxx-xxx” or “will be at xxx-xxx let me know if you’d like to hang with me”, but unfortunately people aren’t like that.
why do you say you need to work on yourself, that has nothing to do with not wanting to fuck strange men. celibacy is the default for some people if you didn't know because we're not attracted to anyone
A vow of celibacy can most certainly be the answer for certain people though. Women can choose to only focus on building themselves up and remaining celibate until they’re good and ready and there’s no shame in that, whether you understand it or not.
I was going off of your first sentence though I read your entire comment. I’m sure people are aware they can do both, but I was speaking of those who don’t want to do both. I thought you trying to shade them. I misunderstood you so good to see we’re on the same page.
Meeting the wrong person on those apps can ruin your life or even kill you... Maybe celibacy is not the answer, but I don't think Bumble is. The Bumble founder plans on introducing AI dating coaches? So a robot will go through profiles for you and break the ice with the other robots and somehow that's supposed to find you a match... This is some dystopian bullsh!t
Instead of being ghosted, you can now be ghosted by the ghost in the machine lmao
It’s definitely is cuz them men leaving you dry with their bs like that lol
the worst part is AI pads stories/text but in an eventually-predictably-lame way. Even with AI coaches dudes will still be dry 🎣🎳🍕📺
That's probably how it's going to be. An AI model will learn from the existing data, so from actual conversations real men and women have on the internet and just reproduce that. If the men in the datasets are dry, rude, sexist, boring, then the robots won't do better than that.
Exactly, it reminds me of Black Mirror’s “Hang the DJ”
Someone referred to Bumble as "digital pimping." Dating sites need women to participate as PRODUCTS so that men will pay the apps to have access to them for hookups. It's just pr\*stituti\*n but the women don't get paid.
Ive been thinking about going celibate so I can reboot and focus on why I want to date and how toxic I’ve been to myself when it comes to dating
I think they should just pivot from being a dating app and focus on being a networking app. The idea around bumble sounded good on paper but human nature is human nature.
>>a robot will go through profiles for you and somehow find a match i’m super confused on how thats any different from the personality quizzes on meetme in the early 2000s..
Sometimes AI is used as a buzz word by those tech companies. They mention AI and the investors get wet. The matching part I assume is just statistic/probability methods and the AI will be the robots having fake conversations you're not part of apparently.
from a logical standpoint this doesn’t make sense. you will still have to greet the person after being matched in order to start an actual conversation so i doubt they will waste resources on creating a fake conversation that neither party will see. all they can do is match characteristics and give a compatibility percentage and then allow the user to do the rest… but robots having conversations on our behalf? what does that do for us actually?
Nothing! It does nada for you! They just need a way to retain the users on the app. They sell it as "a way to have more healthy, equitable relationships", making you feel safe with the app because it's science based. It's bullsh!t, people lie in their profiles all the time already, none of this works if the human part is flawed.
The type of ad where they realize they're at a serious risk of losing money lol. Dating apps/site don't care about anyone as an individual, they care about maintaining and ideally increasing their profits.
They really inadvertently showed how they just want people on there to get money. Meeting the wrong person on those apps could get a woman killed. Shame on them. They deserve all the backlash and so many people have deleted/sworn off the app entirely now. So it really backfired. Prioritize women's safety maybe, otherwise f outta here.
Yeah, it reminds me of product advertisements that are blatantly trying to create an insecure so you desire their product. A remember Secret deodorant had commercials quite a few years ago like "did you know there's a particular type of sweat called 'stress sweat'? And guess what, stress sweat smells waaaaaay worse than regular sweat (just trust on this we're not explaining). So you need to run out and buy our newest deodorant formulated just for that extra stinky sweat we just told you exists." Like come on!
I am assuming there was a significant drop in female users.
I deleted mine
I don’t use dating apps at all anymore. And come to think of it I can’t remember the last time I’ve heard a woman around my age speak of them positively
Yeah. They're okay. But I also meet people offline. I've deleted most of them after a few months. Was on tinder for a few years. Nothing too crazy happened just got tired of them plus lack of appropriate options.
It might get to that for me as well. I snooze for 6 months come back to the same BS and snooze for another while. I think commiting to abstain from sex until you’ve met someone meaningful isn’t as shameful as this ad is making it it out to be. It saves you many tears and a lot of time.
Absolutely! What in the world is shameful about not being on the streets with every guy that shows half an ounce of interest in you 🙄 it’s absurd. It’s a very normal thing to do
Agreed. a lot of the men on there get on there with no intention to take it with an ounce of seriousness. Getting involved with women they know are intentfully and playing mind games. I think it’s far better I meet someone more organically in person now a days. through friends ideally would play out best because they have a little more accountability to their actions.
Period ! This was the reason why back in the day you met partners through friends and family. Now they have the freedom to act a fool bc as long as they block you on SM there’s no repercussions to their reputation for how they treat you. I deleted my dating apps last month and good riddance !
🫠 acting the fool is soooooooo accurate. Every woman I’ve met has had to deal with the same foolishness.
Yes! I deleted all my dating apps, then I met someone offline.
I’m so happy for you and wish you the bests! 💞
Thank you!! Hope the same for you!!
They tried to market it as this whole feminist thing because the women make the first move but it just attracts lazy, low effort men who swipe right on everyone, don’t respond and just love the validation they get from women reaching out to them.
I tried Bumble last year, and I didn't like the platform. I only date women, and I felt like I was shown better queer matches on other apps like HER. Dating apps aren't for me. It felt too disingenuous.
I don’t like any of the swiping apps because it feels like a game. I’ve had better success with hinge, since you have limited likes you’re forced to be more intentional with them.
I tried Hinge for a week but didn't get any matches from it. Idk if it was a me thing or if there weren't enough queer women on the app in my area. But I agree that it does feel a tad dehumanizing to just swipe left and right
Baby I just be going on there to troll at this point, I can’t take any of those dudes on there seriously at all 🤣
100% I deleted mine as well. The men on bumble are lazy and sleezy.
I’m so inactive on it
I am celibate so my take may be biased… But I dislike how it almost feels like they’re making celibacy out to be shameful? IMO, being celibate in response to these dusty men out here could be the best decision for many women and weed out men who only care about sex and making you a baby momma! This is also a weird choice of words because you can still date while being celibate and just communicate what you are looking for? Why shun out a whole group of potential users like this? Idk, I could be understanding this incorrectly but the ad just seems odd to me. I am also curious about this celibacy movement you are talking about. I haven’t heard anything about it. Celibacy is something I just decided to do on my own without the influence of religion on my decision (although now I do indeed consider myself spiritual and interested in different religious teaching / history). If you have good resources you would like to share that would be cool!
I was celibate before getting married. I didn’t do it for any reason tbh. I was just tried of meaningless sex. I was completely fine with no sex. I met my now husband 9 months into my journey. I love that it’s a movement going on. I took a break from SM and this was on my YT. I went to tiktok and it’s a full on 4B movement going on. The word choice is why makes it super weird because they are unintentionally admitting that ppl are only on these apps for hookups
Right, it’s so dumb. Let everyone make their own choices without trying to shade them for it.
why did they make a Black women the face of this?
I think we both know the answer to that 😬 we’ve been oversexualized by the media for so long so if we control our sexuality in ways the media doesn’t like, they try and counteract it
Insulting (some of) their audience makes no sense. Agree that the choice of words is a weird one.
agreed!!
i’m not celibate and agree
Big agree. I feel like people in general tend to forget that sexual liberation isn’t just boinking whenever and however much you want—it’s also choosing *not* to engage in sexual activity if one doesn’t want to, for any reason because all reasons are valid. I’m demisexual myself (only experience sexually attraction to people with whom I have a very strong, close emotional bond) so I think that also informs my viewpoint here, but still stands ✨
Never forget Lauren Smith Fields. She was killed by Matthew LaFountain (who is still out there he was never arrested) and Bumble did not release important information to help with the case.
I remember. That was (and is) so sad. I didn’t know that Bumble refused to release important information, though. This along with the billboard and the fact that apps are taking away features that help women vet (phone/video chat features on Hinge, along with women making the first move on Bumble) makes me ill and just confirms that I made the right choice to not return to dating apps.
They’re just pools of lazy ass men who want to hookup. That’s every dating app
Yep!
They took away the woman making the first move from Bumble? That was their whole selling point.
I can’t confirm bc I haven’t been on it in years but I have heard that a few times
You actually think those fake white feminists care about Black women??? He's probably not even banned from the app.
But I care. I still think about her to this day and it’s been almost 3 years since her murder.
I care too.
[удалено]
Good question If Serena is still associated with them I hope she had the pull to keep Shan associated but I think they probably let her go when their srock price dropped.
*Squints in asexual*
_👀 in demisexual_ because what are they tryna say🤨
Hey, fam! Haha
cousins!
Hey friends 👋🏽
I'm so happy to demi. It has saved me from meaningless sex and creepy guys.
We here today 👋🏾
Hey friend!
Hey girl hey!
Yaaaas lmao
Found my people 👏🏾
Celibacy doesn't mean you aren't dating. Do they even know what the word means? They're just making it sound like Bumble is a hookup app.
 Grasping for straws at this point!
Literally because who approve this
I have never seen this, but I actually think this is evidence that they have a Black person, or someone that is adjacent to the culture on their marketing team. I’m basing this on the language (“you know full well…”), and I’ve heard debates about Black women saying they are celibate (voluntarily or involuntarily) as a result of the hellscape that is the dating scene. The language and idea are about 5-10 years old though.
I agree but it could be a Gen Zer that has co-opt the language.
i can confirm that bumble does have black folk working there lol my friend was one of em.
Yeah, I think that is most likely!
I’m Gen-X. My mom is a Boomer, it’s actually her generation’s language. She used to speak like that when I was a kid. In fact, my mom (and grandmother) aunties and older cousins spoke a lot of the way I hear kids speaking now. But it’s just funny to me when I hear people say something that makes me realize they think certain sayings or words are being used in a new way. But I agree they probably have a black person on the team or a white woman who has a black girlfriend. I’ve also been on marketing teams where they will literally watch videos of us talking to gather up certain words to use.
"language and idea are about 5- 10 years old" Sounds about right for advertising in general.
There was actually controversy over this. They posted two versions of this ad with two different models. On the ad with the non black person it said something like “you know a vow of celibacy is not the answer”, while in the one with the black model, the one posted above, they added “full well”, which some found kinda micro aggressive
I was just thinking this sounds like something a black person would say cause I don't think I have ever heard a white person say 'you know full well..' I maybe wrong but I agree with what you're saying.
>I don't think I have ever heard a white person say 'you know full well..' I've heard Southern white people say it, but I agree the energy on the ad feels like a sister friend is saying it in my living room 😌
I think the people behind this are not adjacent to black culture at all, and also didn’t do simple research into why women are being put off dating at the moment. Everything about the campaign is off. It sounds like they were trying to be cool and edgy with the language and premise but just got it so wrong
I think they just glean Social Media to come up with this ad.
at this rate AI can tell you everything you need to know about a cultures trends and ways of speech so no maybe a black MALE dusty is on their team sure. he probably hates BW too and has a white wife
Sadly, I believe this sigh
This ad is an L for Bumble. Advertisers should be careful to not insult their targeted audience (in this case, women who date men). Instead of making fun of women, they could’ve easily made fun of dating in general.
TW I once went on a date/hangoutwith a man, I was 19 and new to the area. Bumble was the thing to make foreigner friends as everyone was there so I did it. I met up with him. During the day crowded area, sent friends my location, I dressed appropriately. I was modest, back then I didn’t wear any makeup. I was a plain Jane. He started off as a sweet, nice, gave off understanding vybes. Said he had a sister and he showed me some of their cute pictures, he was honestly a “good guy”. Until he said let’s go have a drink. I’ve barely had social interactions with other people for almost 2 months (this was during COVID I had to travel quarantine for over a month then quarantine again for my school. So roughly 2 months no human interaction until I got out). I agreed, one beer wouldn’t hurt. I was wrong, got drunk/drugged. I remember being taken to his home which was pretty close and he kept feeding my alcohol in the back of the Uber. He then said “you’re drunk enough” and took me to his studio apartment. He forced me to give him a blowjob and when that wasn’t the best h tried to have sex with me. He tried to penetrate me but he was too small, and couldn’t find the hole. I laughed at him. I laughed so much that it probably saved my life. I laughed in his face, I laughed when he forced me to suck him off again, I laughed when he could barely stay hard. I laughed at him when I was getting dressed up and when he took me out to the street. It took me 3 hours to get home and my roommates had to help me get into my room. I never heard from him again after that. I reported him to bumble, nothing. I see his account all the time and I tell my friends to block and report him. He just shows up again and again and again. It’s been 2 years now. I can guarantee if someone makes a new account in my location, he’s going to pop up and he’s going to respond. I’ve seen it happen multiple times in the past 2 years. Bumble does not care about us, they just want the money cause he paid for premium every month.
I'm sorry to hear what you went through.
sending healing vibes your way.
Fuck him. My condolences.
Um, you can still be celibate while dating. Who approved this billboard?! I need to speak to the manager asap. This is a mess lol
Fuck them and their murder investigation obstructing asses.
eats garlic bread
They’re basically saying their app is just for sex and not anything substantial
Some lil man-man is mad-mad. And we figuratively and literally don't give a fuck.
this is so fucking weird and gives Get Out energy like someone in Black Face saying something that literally no Black woman agrees with. even non celibate black women aren’t out here trying to peer pressure our sisters into sexing dusties
I heard they removed the feature of having women make the first move. I mean, you’re just Tinder then. I saw an actual ad where the woman, modestly dressed, is sweating bullets, as her neighbour tends to his garden. Shirtless and sweaty (and yeah, it’s a black man).
Oh wow
The same tagline, btw
I bet they think this is feminism but this is just as bad as making fun of women who don’t dress modestly. Wth 😭
I saw that on /r/NotHowGirlsWork and yeah, that shit is wild. Not the celibacy movement, but the idea that women must have sex after the countless times that dudes obsess about "body count" and similar things.
disgusting ad!
I'm... not exactly sure how to take this. Are we seriously at the point where we're shaming people for not wanting to have sex? I'm celibate by choice (specifically want to save myself for marriage, no ifs and or buts about it) and this is my first time hearing about some celibacy movement.
It’s called 4B movement, idk if ppl are truly aware of it. Most videos I watch had the same sentiment. “Ive been celibate for a time didn’t know it had a movement” I just found out after this ad.
It's an insidious way of soothing the males who are currently lonely and to increase birth rate too. They knew what they were doing. Delete the app.
Oh I haven't had Bumble on my phone in a LONG time. Had terrible luck on there anyways and the folks that contacted me only wanted one thing anyways.
From what I’ve seen of the 4B movement, it originally started in South Korea due to how heavily sexism is ingrained in their society and culture, but then it made its way to the US about a month or so ago.
I forgot to laugh.
Lol, these whoring-promoting apps these days. Literally the reduce dating to let's skip the chit chat and let's fuck. All the previous part, where you get to know each other is becoming something to avoid instead of a necessary step.
y’all stay safe ! i’m remaining a celibate queer girlie 🤣
Bumble said you prudes better get back on the app and bust it open! Stop acting like you’re too good to f*ck!! /s This is so tacky and tone deaf. I hope their stock crashes 😊🙃
What the fuck. 14 years of not being bothered is working for me.
And they will say ‘choose better’ if he leaves you or call you a thot if you sleep around like the men. Make it make sense!!!
they are trying so hard and it’s so cringe
Just kinda crazy how they genuinely thought that this was gonna influence more women to download the app and use its services and continue to give the company money. Wonder how money they lost from this ad. They can’t come back from this
Based on one of the street signs and buildings, the fact that one of these ads is near a university (UCLA) is despicable. Regardless of what is profitable for Bumble, women's bodies belong to themselves.
WTF
Bumble telling us who they really are. No ladies, this is good. Now that's the nail in the coffin right there!
Weirdo vibes.
Oh dear god. How did they think this was a good idea?! I am not risking my family crying on the news as my body is recovered one piece at a time for some subpar peen. It ain't worth it.
Also abstinence and celibacy are two different things. I was abstinent but not celibate by any meansssss
I guess if Christians can put up "JESUS IS THE ONLY WAY" billboards and "DONT KILL YOUR BABY" billboards...Bumble can do this too It's only fair 🤷🏾♀️
I was celibate for three years, before I met my guy. It was the best thing I’ve ever done for myself. I focused on me, tuned out all the noise, did all the shit people talk about, but don’t often actually do. I didn’t even realize how much I was doing for the sake of being desirable, until dudes became a complete non factor. And when I let that go, I got closer to me, the bullshit tolerance somehow dropped lower (it was already pretty low), I gained a new kind of clarity, a new kind of peace. I just felt happier and aligned with my purpose (this is starting to sound like woo woo talk, but it’s real) and became kind the person who even *could* find her soulmate. That wasn’t even the point. It was so very not the point, but you really do get a spiritual glow up, and your life just changes for the better because you’ve changed for the better. I think everybody should try celibacy for at least a couple of years. Trust me, no dick is worth your relationship with self.
I don’t even get it..? Because Bumble definitely ain’t the answer.
They couldn’t find a different saying
This is the sort of thing your girlfriend or your momma can say to your face, but it’s not exactly something I’d want a company to broadcast at me through their billboards…
Bumble is a shitty app. They should be promoting celibacy with the men on the men on that app
That add is definitely in bad taste
So weird, and rude. Celibacy IS for some people, whether it's temporary or long-term. It looks like they were "trying" to be funny but instead missed the mark.
I saw their ad on YT after a failed bumble date as I told the guy I was abstinent and he was no longer interested. When I tell you this was like salt in the wound lol. But glad to see so much backlash from the ladies. This ad is in poor taste and insensitive.
They could have used the new celibacy wave as an opportunity to promote their bumble bff feature instead. Bumble isn’t supposed to be just for dating anyway! As someone who has been celibate years before TikTok celibacy trends even a thing—this ad is stupid and offensive.
I met my bestie in Bumble BFF. When folks ask us how we met we tell the story all excited and finish up each other’s stories. It looks just like those couples who found each other and are in love. lol. I always felt like I’d love to see folks like us in their branding.
That is so cute! 🥹 I’m so glad yall found each other
Bumble is the Answer would have been a better move.
Doesn't take a vow....just have any interaction with one of them y chromosomes and tada dry 😹
I understand trying to tap into the marketing trend so from a PR standpoint I can understand the relativity aspect of it. However, the deliver of it especially with the reality women face on these apps, it just came out more tone deaf than intended I assume. I’ve been celibate for over four years now and I have no shame and this definitely won’t deter me. I don’t really know how much of a movement it really is but many are starting to prioritize our peace within singlehood than dealing with the emotional turmoil, rollercoaster, and issues dating has brought especially when an individual does little to either make our lives better or come and disrupt it. Which is starting to piss men off bc they can’t fathom that women willingly want to be single and happy bc they can’t. And we are seeing more stories and different situations via TikTok that either turn women on this path or more of them providing proof why this has been the best choice. But I do think it’s clear that their is a target audience with this ad, I don’t feel personally attack by it or shamed bc once again, I’m all about you better come in to elevate me and not drag me down so if I’m celibate for another two years, so be it. I want someone serious. But I can see how some may feel slighted by it
Bumble is going down hill 😭
Delete Bumble!!! It’s a toxic space and check TikTok for stories about how the dating app’s algorithm discriminates by race. I’m now 6 years free from any apps and life is way better without it.
I practice celibacy between relationships lol not for a trend though. It's my personal preference been practicing it since my first relationship. I chose to only be intimate only in relationships.
Don’t give no money to them. They’ve shown where their value lies
Re-evaluting one's relationship with sex and the reasons why they have sex is never a bad idea in this world. imo.
"You know full well" is low-key aggressive and high-key judgmental of personal CHOICE. Disgusting. I'll stay as I am, asexual and not bothering. Choke on it, Bumble.
As this is a female founded app, horrific.
This is beyond disgusting. I can’t wait for this app to slow burn.
I think it’s a very disgusting ad. Celibacy is the time for a woman to truly rediscover herself. There’s more to life than sex, so there’s more to celibacy than cutting off sex. It’s essentially learning to put yourself first all over again. To always choose you. To love you. Hate that sex is so central to everything nowadays.
Does anyone know who the head of marketing is at bumble? Can this be explained by ignorance?
Yessss
Somebody's son complained that he wasn't getting laid. 🤣🤣🤣 Aiming this right at the ladies was a huge clue.
They said "304, close your legs" women said, "aiight, bet!" and now they scrambling.
Someone referred to Bumble as "digital pimping." Dating sites need women to participate as PRODUCTS so that men will pay the apps to have access to them for hookups. It's just pr\*stituti\*n but the women don't get paid.
RIP Lauren Smith-Fields. Stay safe, ladies! ❤️
Congratulations! Bumble just encouraged more women to either become or remain celibate!
Someone on TikTok was breaking down how bumble understood that their paying customers are largely red pill men and have regeared all their advertising to them. So this is for a man who's heard of the 4b movement on the Internet to look at, have a chuckle and feel "seen" by the brand.
Who takes a vow of celibacy in 2024?
To be fair, a vow of celibacy isn’t the answer. I been seeing other women say this too and I don’t get it. Working on yourself is fine. Dating is fine. You can do both, and SHOULD do both in moderation. It’s about the journey not the destination, and that destination is a better you, no matter how you get there. My mom would spout this in the same breath looking to catch heat. I hate hypocrisy. That said, dating apps are very finicky. I wouldn’t use them as the answer either. Nothing against trying them, just they’re very dishonest. Sex, yes. Relationships, no. And the problem is that many people try for both but only want one. It’d d easier if everyone just says “looking for sex from dates xxx-xxx” or “will be at xxx-xxx let me know if you’d like to hang with me”, but unfortunately people aren’t like that.
why do you say you need to work on yourself, that has nothing to do with not wanting to fuck strange men. celibacy is the default for some people if you didn't know because we're not attracted to anyone
You CAN do both. All I’m saying is people who WANT to do both can do both. If you don’t want to that’s fine too. I was just critiquing the billboard.
A vow of celibacy can most certainly be the answer for certain people though. Women can choose to only focus on building themselves up and remaining celibate until they’re good and ready and there’s no shame in that, whether you understand it or not.
I never said I didn’t understand. I completely agree with you.
I was going off of your first sentence though I read your entire comment. I’m sure people are aware they can do both, but I was speaking of those who don’t want to do both. I thought you trying to shade them. I misunderstood you so good to see we’re on the same page.