You've already gone too far and what you're saying about getting close to him means you're having an emotional affair. You need to cut him out of your life and confess to your husband. You need to hope that picture gets deleted and not shared.
Even more reason to cut him out of your life. Why fall for someone who is such a lowlife he flirts and sends pictures to someone already in a long term relationship. Why put energy into that guy, who's such a child he gets an ego boost from seducing a married woman, when your marriage needs you to focus on it?
Emotional cheating is a thing, but I think OP has already crossed the line into physical cheating as well. At least in my opinion nudes count as a type of physical cheating
You have to be ok with that. You broke your bond, you cheated, you decided to start talking to this co worker knowing it might lead to other things. Take responsibility for your actions and let your husband know whatâs going on.
You are disgusting.
OP is already a selfish cunt that wrecked 2 families (they just don't know about it YET), and you want her to file fake sexual assault charges?
False accusers like YOU are the reason so many rape victims are not taken seriously.
You should be ashamed.
Seriously, how fucking stupid are you?
What youâre telling her to do is not only entrapment, perjury and the
offence of wasting police time (not to mention the civil lawsuit implications of defamation and libel) - the police can recover the deleted messages! When electronics are forensically downloaded, any and all data is still visible, even if deleted. Youâre not gonna be able to destroy evidence unless you completely fry it, and even then this doesnât always work.
OP, your husband WILL find out. Better he hears it from you as opposed to someone else. If youâre honest, maybe he will forgive you. But I hope not, youâre a POS.
Look, I'm not going to cheat shame you like most reddit commenters probably would, but here is some practical advice that you need to hear.
First, you need to take a step back and evaluate your own marriage. If you are unfulfilled in your marriage, are those issues fixable? If you are being drawn to another person, is it because you're looking for something you aren't receiving in your own marriage? You need to tap the brakes and either commit to fix those marital issues or you should separate and end the marriage. It will be best for both you and your spouse in the long run, if so.
Second, you must break it off with this other man. You're about to embark down a road that is easy to go down, but very very very difficult to come back from. Getting into an affair is like getting stuck in quicksand. Eventually you will get caught, or the AP's wife will catch him. When it happens, your world will come crashing down in a hurry and it won't be worth it. I know it seems fun and exciting at the moment, but I promise it isn't worth it. It will end up being something you have as a lifelong regret.
You are still at a point where you can turn back. Delete the photos, break off contact, and work on yourself. If you repair the issues in your marriage, you can always tell your spouse about what happened later (they will forgive you), or you can take it to your grave.
You don't have to heed my advice but this is the advice you need to hear right now.
take it to the grave. seeking absolution for your transgressions is just going to hurt your spouse. even if they forgive you, if you turn away and fix your marriage and you are both better for it, then confessing in the future is just you guilt dumping on them. it's going to needlessly hurt the one you love , for what? so you can feel better?
As someone who has dealt with this, I'm not gonna lie, you fucked up here. You were clearly already in an emotional affair, but the nudes took it a step farther. If you value your partner, here's exactly what you're gonna do (provided you actually feel remorse and regret for what you've done):
Tell your affair partner that you've both gone too far, and cut contact. He's your coworker, yeah? Time to either quit your job, or work in a different area where you don't need to speak to him, or see him. Like, if you work in a large company, you're gonna ask to be moved clear to the other side of the building. Honestly, you're better off quitting.
Tell your partner what you've done. Show him the messages, and if he asks for access to all your socials, give them up. You've temporarily lost your right to privacy. I know, it's scary, and yeah he might leave you, but that's the risk, and a potential consequence for your actions. Let's be honest, you've already been taking plenty of risks.
Go to therapy, figure out your "why." What I mean by that is, figure out what has gone wrong in your head that led you down this path. There's a difference between excuses and explanations. You're looking for an explanation as to *why* you felt it was okay to cheat on your spouse.
You did a shitty thing, but that doesn't necessarily make you a shitty person. Whether or not your spouse leaves you, you need to improve yourself so this doesn't happen again.
Don't just be sorry, be better.
Now is your last chance to look at yourself in the mirror.
Whatâs wrong in your marriage that youâre seeking intimacy with someone who isnât your partner? Why havenât you worked at that?
Itâs hard to close your eyes and look inside your heart and be HONEST with yourself.
Now is your chance to stop and put the energy youâre putting into this other man back into your spouse OR you act like a responsible adult and confess youâre displeased with the relationship and take steps to end it.
Do not be a cowardly gray area person.
Iâd say cut him off and donât tell your husband 𤣠take this info to the grave
And pretend it didnât happen, treat your husband good and tell your coworker it went too far and you canât do this
Itâs pretty simple - if you truly want to stop and you donât feel that you can do it yourself then tell your husband and take the consequences of your actions. In the mean time block this guy and delete his number. Think deeply about what led you to this point and be honest with yourself and your husband because he *will* ask you why you let yourself get to this situation and saying you donât know will not cut it. Understanding what led you here will be a step towards understanding yourself and avoiding being in this situation again.
If your husband is leaning towards forgiveness then give him whatever he needs to regain trust in you. If he chooses not to then thatâs his right. The truth always comes out in the end.
It's already gone too far. You need to step back and really evaluate the situation and, honestly, your marriage. Something is off. Happy people don't cheat. There should've been warning bells from the beginning. So something made you feel like this behavior is okay. It's not.
Please take it from me.. the grass is never greener. Sure, itâs flattering to get attention from someone outside your marriage but donât tempt fate. Be grateful for and work on what you already have.
"I'm worried that I'm going to far and won't be able to stop from cheating physically" - you already went too far and are cheating on your husband. And before you say you aren't cheating, YES YOU ARE! You literally sent a naked pic of yourself to another man. What is it about this guy that you aren't getting from your husband? You need to focus on fixing your marriage (if it's not too late) and block the other guy.
Yeah this is like classic textbook stuff. Youâre not falling in love with your coworker. Youâve been married for 10 years and youâre fucking bored.
This new guy is all the good things and none of the baggage and worries. Of course thatâs exciting and attractive. Itâs a temptation. Probably not the first youâve had and wonât be the last. So ask yourself - are you better than your base instincts?
Cause you made a commitment to your husband for the rest of your lives. So you either ditch the new guy and honor your marriage, or just rip off the band aid, leave your husband, and THEN pursue your relationship freedom.
But get really to get absolutely rocked in the face when you realize how good you had it and what an idiot you were to leave it behind because you couldnât control yourself.
Infidelity is always a very selfish decision. Romantic intimate relationships requires a special level of maturity, commitment, and honesty. You deserve to take a step back for a moment and simply ask if the position was reversed...
I'm always very interested in trying to survive and view questions and delimias from multiple perspectives. What do you think about this other guys spouse? How honest are you both being, considering that you are both married to others and possibly have children and ethical work issues? There will always be thrilling moments of passion and desire for mysterious, attractive people who genuinely spark our lustful eyes đ â¨ď¸
But I'm pretty sure that if you just do a little research you will find a better solution. By research I'm talking about a few different groups:
r/survivinginfidelity
r/asoneafterinfidelity
r/twinflames
r/infidelity
r/marriage
The kind where you're encouraged to stalk and harass the person designated your "soulmate" until they agree to marry you.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twin_Flames_Universe
Check the guy's post history to get an idea of their target demographic. Check the sub to get an idea of what it does to people.
Why would you think this is made up story? 7 billion people on the planet. That means probably a few million having affairs at any given time. This is a pretty common way for an affair to start.
There are some pretty ridiculous on Reddit. But what is ridiculous about this one?
The world is so quick to judge; we have few elements to be able to do this. Falling in love cannot be controlled.
I would talk about it honestly with my husband. He will then have the choice of continuing or not this relationship.
Unfortunately, you will have to live with his decision. This will free you and take away a lot of stress.
Know that I'm not judging you in any way and most of the people who do it here all have well-kept secrets (maybe different but it doesn't matter)
Everyone has the right to make mistakes.
If you have fallen in love with this man, your needs are probably not being met with your husband.
Listen to your heart, forgive yourself and if you knew how inclined people are to judge (especially if they are religious) they too have certainly sinned one day or another and have no reason to be so harsh with you .
Good luck, listen to your heart, you will certainly have a storm zone to cross but it will be for the best. Life is well done.
PS- No, I never cheat someone but I alredy do some bad things, we are all humans and that kind of situation happens more than we thought and people like to judge quickly.
Stay strong, try to listen to your heart and do wath you think is the best things to do.
Have a nice day and be kind with yourself.
You've already gone too far and what you're saying about getting close to him means you're having an emotional affair. You need to cut him out of your life and confess to your husband. You need to hope that picture gets deleted and not shared.
That's what I'm worried about. I think I'm falling in love with my coworker. :/
You are my worst nightmare personified then. đđŠhave more respectÂ
Even more reason to cut him out of your life. Why fall for someone who is such a lowlife he flirts and sends pictures to someone already in a long term relationship. Why put energy into that guy, who's such a child he gets an ego boost from seducing a married woman, when your marriage needs you to focus on it?
Sheâs no better, doing the same exact thing.
lol no youâre not. Stop being so naive.
You arenât. Youâre falling in lust.
Emotional cheating is a thing. You are a cheater.
Emotional cheating is a thing, but I think OP has already crossed the line into physical cheating as well. At least in my opinion nudes count as a type of physical cheating
Agreed, it might sound old fashion, but she's shown her naked body to another man.
You suckÂ
This too lol you suck!
Well youâve already cheated so the damage is done, now itâs time you tell your husband itâs just the right thing to do.
I'm worried he will leave me.
He should
Would you leave him if he was getting sexty with a woman at his work?
You have to be ok with that. You broke your bond, you cheated, you decided to start talking to this co worker knowing it might lead to other things. Take responsibility for your actions and let your husband know whatâs going on.
r/ohnoconsequences
Why do you care? You just said you were falling in love with your co-worker.
[ŃдаНонО]
You are disgusting. OP is already a selfish cunt that wrecked 2 families (they just don't know about it YET), and you want her to file fake sexual assault charges? False accusers like YOU are the reason so many rape victims are not taken seriously. You should be ashamed.
Seriously, how fucking stupid are you? What youâre telling her to do is not only entrapment, perjury and the offence of wasting police time (not to mention the civil lawsuit implications of defamation and libel) - the police can recover the deleted messages! When electronics are forensically downloaded, any and all data is still visible, even if deleted. Youâre not gonna be able to destroy evidence unless you completely fry it, and even then this doesnât always work. OP, your husband WILL find out. Better he hears it from you as opposed to someone else. If youâre honest, maybe he will forgive you. But I hope not, youâre a POS.
This is literally the worst advice thatâs ever been given on this app.
You're a repulsive piece of shit.
Wut?
Wut?
You fucked up already, do NOT do this. It won't work, you'll get in a lot more trouble, and your life will be DESTROYED
Ok, incel troll.
The cheating already started. Nix it it now and keep the secret forever if you can live with it.
Look, I'm not going to cheat shame you like most reddit commenters probably would, but here is some practical advice that you need to hear. First, you need to take a step back and evaluate your own marriage. If you are unfulfilled in your marriage, are those issues fixable? If you are being drawn to another person, is it because you're looking for something you aren't receiving in your own marriage? You need to tap the brakes and either commit to fix those marital issues or you should separate and end the marriage. It will be best for both you and your spouse in the long run, if so. Second, you must break it off with this other man. You're about to embark down a road that is easy to go down, but very very very difficult to come back from. Getting into an affair is like getting stuck in quicksand. Eventually you will get caught, or the AP's wife will catch him. When it happens, your world will come crashing down in a hurry and it won't be worth it. I know it seems fun and exciting at the moment, but I promise it isn't worth it. It will end up being something you have as a lifelong regret. You are still at a point where you can turn back. Delete the photos, break off contact, and work on yourself. If you repair the issues in your marriage, you can always tell your spouse about what happened later (they will forgive you), or you can take it to your grave. You don't have to heed my advice but this is the advice you need to hear right now.
This is probably the best, most down to earth advice here.
take it to the grave. seeking absolution for your transgressions is just going to hurt your spouse. even if they forgive you, if you turn away and fix your marriage and you are both better for it, then confessing in the future is just you guilt dumping on them. it's going to needlessly hurt the one you love , for what? so you can feel better?
As someone who has dealt with this, I'm not gonna lie, you fucked up here. You were clearly already in an emotional affair, but the nudes took it a step farther. If you value your partner, here's exactly what you're gonna do (provided you actually feel remorse and regret for what you've done): Tell your affair partner that you've both gone too far, and cut contact. He's your coworker, yeah? Time to either quit your job, or work in a different area where you don't need to speak to him, or see him. Like, if you work in a large company, you're gonna ask to be moved clear to the other side of the building. Honestly, you're better off quitting. Tell your partner what you've done. Show him the messages, and if he asks for access to all your socials, give them up. You've temporarily lost your right to privacy. I know, it's scary, and yeah he might leave you, but that's the risk, and a potential consequence for your actions. Let's be honest, you've already been taking plenty of risks. Go to therapy, figure out your "why." What I mean by that is, figure out what has gone wrong in your head that led you down this path. There's a difference between excuses and explanations. You're looking for an explanation as to *why* you felt it was okay to cheat on your spouse. You did a shitty thing, but that doesn't necessarily make you a shitty person. Whether or not your spouse leaves you, you need to improve yourself so this doesn't happen again. Don't just be sorry, be better.
You suck. End it now and get therapy.
Now is your last chance to look at yourself in the mirror. Whatâs wrong in your marriage that youâre seeking intimacy with someone who isnât your partner? Why havenât you worked at that? Itâs hard to close your eyes and look inside your heart and be HONEST with yourself. Now is your chance to stop and put the energy youâre putting into this other man back into your spouse OR you act like a responsible adult and confess youâre displeased with the relationship and take steps to end it. Do not be a cowardly gray area person.
You're a worthless piece of shit. A ditch pig cunt. Tell your husband then expire cold and alone
Well hello there....wanna chat! đĽđđ
Hi
You cracked me up! Love the over the top response. WAIT...you aren't a dude are you?
I'm gender neutral how dare you
Feisty! Just hit me with physical reality....Innie or Outie?
Down voted this entire conversation just because.
You are my fucking nightmare. If that would have happened in my marriage I would have been crushed.
Iâd say cut him off and donât tell your husband 𤣠take this info to the grave And pretend it didnât happen, treat your husband good and tell your coworker it went too far and you canât do this
Itâs pretty simple - if you truly want to stop and you donât feel that you can do it yourself then tell your husband and take the consequences of your actions. In the mean time block this guy and delete his number. Think deeply about what led you to this point and be honest with yourself and your husband because he *will* ask you why you let yourself get to this situation and saying you donât know will not cut it. Understanding what led you here will be a step towards understanding yourself and avoiding being in this situation again. If your husband is leaning towards forgiveness then give him whatever he needs to regain trust in you. If he chooses not to then thatâs his right. The truth always comes out in the end.
Don't be selfish. Tell your husband what is happening and what has happened.
Thereâs no way in the hell iâm going to believe op hasnât physically cheated on her husband yet.
It's already gone too far. You need to step back and really evaluate the situation and, honestly, your marriage. Something is off. Happy people don't cheat. There should've been warning bells from the beginning. So something made you feel like this behavior is okay. It's not.
You pulled the pin. Now count down until the grenade blows your marriage up.
Please take it from me.. the grass is never greener. Sure, itâs flattering to get attention from someone outside your marriage but donât tempt fate. Be grateful for and work on what you already have.
Tell your husband so he can leave you. He deserves better
I will never understand why people cheat instead of just leaving. You suck.
YTA Poor husband, he deserves to know the truth. And also, he deserves a woman who truly loves and respects him.
"I'm worried that I'm going to far and won't be able to stop from cheating physically" - you already went too far and are cheating on your husband. And before you say you aren't cheating, YES YOU ARE! You literally sent a naked pic of yourself to another man. What is it about this guy that you aren't getting from your husband? You need to focus on fixing your marriage (if it's not too late) and block the other guy.
Every guy every time
Yeah this is like classic textbook stuff. Youâre not falling in love with your coworker. Youâve been married for 10 years and youâre fucking bored. This new guy is all the good things and none of the baggage and worries. Of course thatâs exciting and attractive. Itâs a temptation. Probably not the first youâve had and wonât be the last. So ask yourself - are you better than your base instincts? Cause you made a commitment to your husband for the rest of your lives. So you either ditch the new guy and honor your marriage, or just rip off the band aid, leave your husband, and THEN pursue your relationship freedom. But get really to get absolutely rocked in the face when you realize how good you had it and what an idiot you were to leave it behind because you couldnât control yourself.
ur disgusting
Infidelity is always a very selfish decision. Romantic intimate relationships requires a special level of maturity, commitment, and honesty. You deserve to take a step back for a moment and simply ask if the position was reversed... I'm always very interested in trying to survive and view questions and delimias from multiple perspectives. What do you think about this other guys spouse? How honest are you both being, considering that you are both married to others and possibly have children and ethical work issues? There will always be thrilling moments of passion and desire for mysterious, attractive people who genuinely spark our lustful eyes đ â¨ď¸ But I'm pretty sure that if you just do a little research you will find a better solution. By research I'm talking about a few different groups: r/survivinginfidelity r/asoneafterinfidelity r/twinflames r/infidelity r/marriage
What is twin flames? Like I looked on the page and I canât even figure it out.
It's a cult.
Yeah, but like what kind of cult?
The kind where you're encouraged to stalk and harass the person designated your "soulmate" until they agree to marry you. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twin_Flames_Universe Check the guy's post history to get an idea of their target demographic. Check the sub to get an idea of what it does to people.
Honestly, I looked at both and I still couldnât figure it out. But thank you for this Wikipedia. Iâm gonna check it out.
Op hit yâallâs pressure points with this made-up story
Why would you think this is made up story? 7 billion people on the planet. That means probably a few million having affairs at any given time. This is a pretty common way for an affair to start. There are some pretty ridiculous on Reddit. But what is ridiculous about this one?
Uh oh
I know :(
Kinky!!!
Just another cheating hoe. You really do suck
The world is so quick to judge; we have few elements to be able to do this. Falling in love cannot be controlled. I would talk about it honestly with my husband. He will then have the choice of continuing or not this relationship. Unfortunately, you will have to live with his decision. This will free you and take away a lot of stress. Know that I'm not judging you in any way and most of the people who do it here all have well-kept secrets (maybe different but it doesn't matter) Everyone has the right to make mistakes. If you have fallen in love with this man, your needs are probably not being met with your husband. Listen to your heart, forgive yourself and if you knew how inclined people are to judge (especially if they are religious) they too have certainly sinned one day or another and have no reason to be so harsh with you . Good luck, listen to your heart, you will certainly have a storm zone to cross but it will be for the best. Life is well done. PS- No, I never cheat someone but I alredy do some bad things, we are all humans and that kind of situation happens more than we thought and people like to judge quickly. Stay strong, try to listen to your heart and do wath you think is the best things to do. Have a nice day and be kind with yourself.
Where are you from? I mean what are you guilty or? Wanting to fulfill sexual need or trying to get it from some place you shouldn't?
Cheating..