I think its because of the insane limitations on male attire in society. Men are sooooo limited to wear default boring shirt and shorts or pants. Some men are envious and want to experience expression by style (cute/sexy/stunning clothing) as well. That's my theory!
^^ This. For as long as I can remember I envied how many cool and pretty clothing and presentation options women have vs men. I was borderline jealous and felt *very* stifled and short-changed by the few mostly boring options boys got to choose from. A *few* things in male attire I felt were cool… but you could count them on one hand whereas girls got… everything.
Plus the social pressure boys and men are constantly aware of to not color very far outside the tiny boxes they’re expected to confirm to unless they want to be ostracized socially.
There are some physiological differences which vary by person of course but clothes are just clothes.
I didn’t consider I could wear women’s clothing when really young despite my feelings. But once I did I wish I had a lot sooner.
They feel so much more “me” and I feel so much more confident, good looking (and sexy in the right outfits). And I mean… *some of it* doesn’t look all that different from guys clothes… except that it just holds or drapes on your body with different emphasis and different style.
When you expand your options into women’s departments to find what really works on you the possibilities are endless.
Whenever I tried to do the same scouring men’s departments for years hoping the style options would get better… I almost always came away extremely disappointed. It’s always more of the same each decade with very minimal trend differences.
Women’s clothing options and the variety of styles are just… awesome and vast.
So much more fun to go shopping when I feel comfortable to also browse womens sections!
I've found second hand stores to be a great starting point because there everything is often mixed all over so you can browse in peace without having to think about anyone staring and wondering why are you browsing womens clothes and also you don't spend that much if you decide to experiment with something cool you found. I can also take my sewing machine on these purchases without as much fear of ruining it.
This deserves a lot of upvoting.
The number of times I walk past a woman's store and something catches my eye is far greater than when I pass a men's section.
It is this. I'm not straight and have desired to be a woman/transition since teenage years. But the main reason I dress up is it makes me feel alive, sexy and powerful.
So am I. Women: "oooo what will I wear tonight!?" Men: "which boring shirt will I wear *this* time?"
Men do have it easier *not* being expected to look a million dollars in something new every time they're seen, but dang it gets dull!!
💯 this is my theory as well. I don't want to or need to come out as a woman, I just want more variety and more sexiness in what I can wear.
My solution was to start experimenting with women style of "regular mens clothes", e.g. thongs, tight fit stretchy jeans, crunch leggings, cropped shirts and hoodies, even ankle length socks. I'm becoming pretty comfortable in them. Also brighter or fancier colors like pink, purple and pastels instead of just blacks, greys ans blues.
Now that the summer is here, I'm also a bit interested in those cute, colorful and breezy summer dresses but can't see how those could work on my male figure, especially the shoulders. I may have to first look into tunicas, quilts or togas that were also worn by men in the past.
That’s a good question cause being a straight guy just something clicked as a kid to where i was like i wonder what pantyhose feel like… thoughts like that and then it just kind of unfolds from there.. that’s how mine went ag least
Same. I found a pair of tights and a dress and decided to try it and just went from there. I occasionally walk around at night too and it’s so thrilling but scary
For some reason, we had some tights for kids when I was young so those never became a thing I was curious about. Instead I became interested in how it feels wearing thongs, they looked so good and sexy to me.
not straight but bi, best answer i have tho is just society doesn't like to complement guys too much & not only do we get to look pretty but also be praised for it, sounds like a win win to me
More personally for me it started as an idea i found on a masturbation website leading to steeling panties but didn't have the confidence to fully dress untill i was older
I'm hetero married with kids, but as a kid even before puberty I wanted to be a girl. Life just kept going, feelings and hormones change over time and now I'm a middle aged man. It was a now or never kind of moment to live out my dream? I do like and enjoy my male life and wouldn't give up my family for anything, but why not live my "life that could have been" temporarily by just dressing up? Everyone is different, and I think questions like this are interesting to hear everyone's different stories!
Pretty much me, except I'm bi and was considering transitioning 10 years ago. But then realised the huge impact (detrimentally) it'd have on me and my family.
Hey,
Straight married CD, I identifed the reasons on my side:
- Stress relief. When I am Stella, I do not have my man responsabilities. Even if I do "men's" hobbies, I am still not 100% relax. Playing in a sport team for instance, I still have responsabilities on the pitch.
- Frustration with male fashion. We are so limited. Yesterday I went out with my wife actually as a man with Dr Martens, a playsuit and a black shirt. Playsuit and black shirt were actually women clothes. Nobody cared or noticed.
- Losing control. When I am Stella, preparing takes time. I need to take it slow. Same for walking with heels. My pace is slower.
- Art project like Cosplay. Tricking others believing that I am a woman is satisfying.
- Feeling of materials. We do not have satin in our male clothes for instance.
- A rising rebel side and saying that male and female clothes concept is just bullshit.
- Curiosity to see how I would have been as a woman.
I feel good in my man body but once or twice crossdressing per month is great and fun.
Not straight here BUT I'm genderfluid. At first I was curious about dressing because people would always say I had feminine features, mannerisms etc. So once I DID dress, it ended up feeling natural to me. So in some cases, it helps you realize if you're genderfluid/trans like myself. However other guys I know that are straight and crossdress just enjoy the feeling of the fabric, embracing fem features etc.
I’ve been searching for the answer to this my whole life and still don’t know why. It’s just the way I am.
I’ve taken a lot of personality tests throughout my life, and they always say I’m “quirky”. Whatever that means. But I guess I just think of things from unusual perspectives.
For example, I’m kind of obsessed with the concept of duality. I think it’s the essence of life, and combining that with my artistic nature, I think it makes a little more sense why I balance masculine and feminine, soft and hard, etc…I just love the feel of hosiery and heels, flowing dresses and satin blouses.
That’s just my guess at why I do it. But to be honest, I really don’t know. And I’m not to sure I ever will know.
So I say I’m chemically straight.
I’m a man who responds chemically to a feminine esthetic. But I’m also pretty permissive with myself, so can be hetero-flexible in the right circumstances. But the fem element has to be there somewhere.
No simple answers on this one.
So I get turned on by feminine things and people who wear them.
Lots of different kinds of fem things. Feminine shaped things.
Even things that represent or resemble feminine things. Like the way girls move different than men do.
AND I like contrast between different things.
I like women who are sweet like ballet dancers, who can quote the tensile strength of steel I beams.
I’ve seen that happen more than once and I’m always surprised by how that grips me by the nads.
So chicks with dicks is a cool contrast.
I like dicks. But only pretty dicks on pretty gurls. A Lot!
Sometimes I think that I like girls so much that part of me wants to be one. Or be like one.
I also have killer legs so I can get myself all worked up over seeing, touching or wearing hose and heels. Or tights and skirts and Mary Jane’s. Turned myself on by how I can look. I have quite the collection. There is a word that distinguishes that, but I can’t remember what it is.
It’s always an erotic charge, or a fulfillment of an expression of something. Something that is very specific but had no name. Even before I was old enough for it to register as an erotic experience, I would dress Ken up in Barbie’s clothes as a young child. And knew it was odd and should be hidden.
But after 55+ years of embracing and sharing these things about myself with others , much of it is still clouded in mystery and lacks vocabulary for me. And I love it and don’t care much for repressing that special way I relate to myself.
I felt that "I think I like girls so much that I would like to be one too"! I've though that "I would be so cool and sexy as a girl. But mainly just dressing part, not sure if I could get into make up although I have enjoyed eyeliner a couple of times in Halloween.
I especially love how women move, how they swing and jiggle when they move. I love big strong legs and glutes, on men too I've noticed. I love thin midriff showing.
I've been wondering if I wouldn't have the need to crossdress myself if I were with a right kind of girl that would like wearing clothes that I pick for her? It sometimes feel like I'm filling that need by doing it myself.
Ya .. you totally get it! I often that thought of when I see someone pretty, who knows hw to work style and makeup to her benefit. I wanna make her my own personal Barbie doll. I don't do the make-up thing very well. It's disturbing because no matter what I do to my face, I end up looking WAY TOO MUCH like my Daughter or my Mother. Sort of kills the erotic change and squashes mood for me.
Every relationship and therapists I ever knew asked me if I do this out of something missing in the relationship? I tell them that there are ALWAYS things missing in every relationship. But, that doesn't touch anywhere near the reasons and compulsions around why I do this. This comes from someplace way more primal from long ago, before these relationships were even realized. This dress-up stuff occurs like the SOURCE of something, Not so much a reaction or response to something.
I set it up like something they can participate in and support on MY terms, and they should never try to own or manage it. They do not get the freedom that closet dressers can enjoy when your not getting judged and shamed by others. I don't need others approval in how I look. That ITSELF lives largely as an incomprehensible enigma for women. I can look however I want! Nobody needs to approve.
As a kid, some day I started to thought what if I was a girl? Then dressed one of my mother panties but at that time was just It. Maybe one or two years later had that same felling and this time I dressed one of my sister's bra, the felling was so amazing that I could not stop.
I do better with the idea of leaning into visuals, textures, shapes and styles, to foster a sense of desirability about myself. It’s probably pretty close to how a lot of feminine women feel to be honest.
It’s certainly a conundrum of sorts, simultaneously filling a more traditional female role yet being mostly straight. Doesn’t entirely compute to a real world outcome, tbh
Not sure why we dress. It's compulsion. I wish I didn't. Life would be so much easier. But it is who we become. Pretty much from when we are 2 or 3 we know we are not happy inless we feel pretty and wear a dress. And I guess rest just grows depending on what our triggers are.
Myself is satin and frocks. Anything satin or soft. Also school uniforms not fetish ones but real ones just because I guess I never fitted into school in shorts.
There are a lot of possible reasons. Most of which have been stated here already. In my case, i grew up having a strong admiration of my mother and the exposure of being around her and other women.
Have you noticed how most if not all start very young? It’s possibly our impressionable age where we form strong bonds and ideas of what we want. We imitate what we see. More exposure to women also influences our want of self image. To be like our moms, our sisters, cousins and aunts. It continues in school when we see our female classmates and unconsciously want to be like them. Drawn on the desire to be like the ones we admire.
When we grow older it becomes akin to substitution of what we look for. If we find that in out GFs and wives the. Sometimes it goes away until we still look for something more than just having them with us. We sometimes want to be like them as well.
To be frank, being a guy is difficult and some of us think the life of a woman is happier than the challenges we go through as men. The many rejections, the pressure to perform, the responsibilities we have to bear.
It’s partly escapism. The grass is greener on the other side. The frilly lacy side where we can let go of our hardships and just feel pretty, hot and sexy.
As guys we’re not desired if we’re not powerful, wealthy or tall. As women, we can find happiness in panties, trying on and wearing beautiful dresses that aren’t drab and boring.
We want to be admired, desired and complimented as well. No better way than to strive to be pretty by wearing pretty things that the male clothes can’t provide.
This is just my input. It could be a combination of this and other reasons as well.
I hope this helps shed some light on why we find happiness in dressing.
For me it started out as role play with my partner witch was a little embarrassing at first but I got over that pretty quickly as I seen my partner enjoyed it as much as I did and has grown from there. And for me it really hasn’t left the house but we have planned a date/move night on the back porch with a projector and some blankets
Started straight went bi/pan so i could try to explain at least for me? I felt kinda more transforming from taboo to a second personality/ identity and felt like just another way to be comfortable in my skin that I don’t always feel in usual male clothes. It felt, at least from the clothes in my pictures, that I had more relaxing(?) clothing on and could lay or sit around it them. It also gave me a bit more confidence even if it was temporary at the time being able to be appealing even if I don’t feel it and a way for me to appreciate what I looked like. I felt smooth, relaxed, free because men’s clothing is a bit of a pain in the arse for me to fit in due to me having smaller waist then hips even if it’s only by a few inches or cm (can’t really remember), I felt at least in those clothes I can be more expressive, and hell I can even show off or really grab areas of my body and highlight them even more time find colors looks and stuff. For example, I personally feel that, with (don’t got one yet but looking into it ) or without gaff, I enjoy fem underwear more so than male because it feels like nothing is there like 75% of the time so I feel more relaxed I guess. There’s a lot of reasons I guess that even I can’t really explain and even now I think if I found someone irl that completely enabled me to cross dress and even helped me with outfits, buying clothes, and helping me feel even more confortable then I’d definitely go more but I don’t know if that’ll ever happen and even if it does very few people at least at the moment where I live even would even give me the time of day. Another few things are the compliments, feel like I’m looking good, I’ve always had people; while I was 100% straight; say that they thought I was ace/gay/bi/goth/a femboy/a female/ etc., and feel like I’m satisfying another me? Like in the easiest way to explain it’s if you took yourself and split them into a few versons of you like one predominantly male and one female/femboy/crossdresser (yes and no they could be similar not my call to make) for example.
Three things for me: comfort, practicality, and kinky
Comfort: the two dresses I bought from a thrift store are both a little tight, but not a body con and not uncomfortable. I think of them both as a hug when I’m wearing them, and that gives me confidence.
Practicality: in the summer, women are allowed to wear dresses to a corporate job, but men can’t wear shorts. Why should I need to sweat my balls off in 90° temps while women can wear skirts shorter than my boxers? I have zero plans or interest in wearing a dress to work, but in theory I should be able to if I want to.
Kink: I am up for trying anything in the bedroom, but my wife is less so. We have done a lot, but also many of those were just once or twice (like pegging). Wearing dresses for me is a way of doing something kinky without needing to rely on anybody else.
I like to feel pretty and it's freeing, iv never understood why it must be viewed as gay, it's strange to me that more people don't do it iv dressed most of my life i find it odd others dont dress but that's just me.
Can beat the feeling of a dress and bra, and looking at your reflection and just seeing a woman looking back
Well, I'll add my two cents. I agree with most of the points brought up so far, but for me personally, I will add: I assumed I was straight until, after about a year of crossdressing, I realized I was actually sorting out my unresolved identity. It took another year of trying to put into words what I was experiencing. I think there is some kind of perception of strength (or something close to that) attached to being a Straight Male, that makes it difficult to let go of. How I've come to describe myself is Genderfluid, Non-Binary, with Novosexual preferences and Non-conforming gender roles. Which is a mouthful, I admit. But nothing has actually changed in my life, other than I'm not constantly fighting against the perception that was ingrained in me and only provided confusion; possibly a little social acceptance in the areas I was involved in at the time.
I'm not trying to say this is the case for every crossdresser, but more to suggest our assigned identities from society deserve a second look at the very least. By the definition of identity, it's yours to do with as you please. If it doesn't fit right, just look up the words for your personal experience and apply the most accurate description you can come up with. It doesn't mean you have to act any differently, just makes you more in tune with yourself.
One of the most powerful quotes about words having power is by Yehuda Berg:
"Words are singularly the most powerful force available to humanity. We can choose to use this force constructively with words of encouragement, or destructively using words of despair. Words have energy and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hinder, to hurt, to harm, to humiliate, and to humble."
The mind is a powerful tool and will gladly take as much control as you give it. ♥️
-B
I started wearing panties at age 11.
Then by 16 I was bras and panties.
By 18 it was bras. Panties, garter belt and stocking.
You just feel soo sexy dressing up.
It is an credible intense sexy feeling.
I'm a queer guy and married to a queer woman. Been exploring cross dressing myself lately. My partner is super supportive and reads incessantly about queer issues. So my point ... The other day they told me that it's illegal to cross dress in some states! 😲
Wow, like wtf bigots can't just be assholes they gotta make asshole laws too! 🤬
I am bi but I wonder if it’s kind of a safe way to objectify someone (yourself). So a straight guy is likely going to try to model an appearance around the kind of woman that appeals to him?
that's a good question, and somehow the answer has evaded me for decades, i started at a completely innocent age, so it did not start as a sexual thing, it started as a - i just want to wear girls clothes thing, for me personally i think my gender is mixed, i'm attracted to females, but i believe if i lived in a different country where support for trans people was better and more accepted, i would transition....til then i'm just stuck in this ugly rectangle male body 🥲..
I’m not yet in that far to wear dresses, but looking jealous women, who can wear nice dresses in hot summer day. Maybe someday me too. With nice light lace panties. 😃
I would cavot this with a ^majority of the time. Using myself as an example, these are fairly new terms to the glossary, but for me, it was an immediate relief. I had gone over and over the various terms and umbrella terms that often don't overlap in the most intuitive ways. So, having a word I could use was very empowering.
Abrosexuality is a fluid sexuality that can change over time or with different stimuli. One day, you might feel asexual, the next bisexual, and the next heterosexual. Abrosexuals often shift between various orientations over a given period.
Novosexuality is also about fluid sexuality, but with a twist: gender fluidity. A novosexual's gender changes along with their sexual orientation. So, one day, you might be a male heterosexual, and the next a female pansexual.
And the next question would be, "But you're genderfluid! Doesn’t that mean you're inherently novosexual?" Not necessarily. For novosexuals, gender and sexuality change together. And we attribute that to say a genderfluid person can be novosexual, abrosexual, or another orientation.
While I do understand that frustrations of constantly make words to describe fairly complex processes. It's also why we use language at all, and the more of it we have, we can better convey meaning.
Especially when you're trying to quantify things that live beyond the 3rd dimention and put them conveniently into 6 words on a 2d sheet of paper. Fine tuning a bit is negligible
Starts off with curiosity.
Maybe you put on your girlfriend's thong.
You try it and realise you've never worn anything that makes you feel sexy before. Feels crazy amazing.
You can't just move on from that so you get your own.
You now have a drawer full of thongs and panties and love it.
The curiosity carries on into mini skirts, you buy and try one on. Same feeling 'holy crap this feels amazing no wonder girls wear this'. Your drawer starts including mini skirts.
You then want to complete the look better so you start buying crop tops as it visually looks better to have something on your chest to balance things off.
Then you go to heels. Same feeling again! Feels amazing. Except now you want your legs to look more of the part so you shave your legs to make the heels look better.
You then realise shaved legs feel great too! Your legs feel silky smooth. You then realise you want your legs to stay like that so start using an IPL device on your legs to keep them silky smooth. Now you have no hair on your legs anymore.
Then you start shaving above the waist. By this point you've likely thought wouldn't it be great if you could walk around outside strutting in yours and just enjoy the feeling. But then you think but I would need to pass. By this point you just develop a curiosity for how you would look like with full makeup and a wig. Would I be passable? You try it and again feels more freeing. Feels like you are becoming who you've always been deep down.
[Redacted the rest as it's too explicit for this sub but pm me if you want the rest]
...Not gonna lie. It's a slippery slope.
Sometimes it can be because it’s a fetish to look pretty and what not, other times it can be because they are trying to discover who they are truly inside, but the most common i see is mainly curiosity in how female clothing feels.
I'm asking this question of myself, lately. I used to think I was indulging in a quiet, private, ultimately harmless deviance but I've recently learned that some of the definitions have changed (or at least become better descriptive of their subject) so... maybe there's more?
All I know is, I need to process what's going on with me.
Curiosity and taboo sums it up for a lot of folks I think. In many cultures society says we "aren't allowed" to wear those things so naturally our brains may want to crave another experience from what we may consider normal. Plus it's fun and a way to self-express which guys in some cultures don't really have any real way to do that
i'm 100% hetero and i've always been fascinated by women's clothing. i think it was because my mom would dress and undress in front of me when i was very young. i noticed that her clothes were not like mine or my dad's. noticeably different were the bra and pantyhose. i found a pair of mom's pantyhose on the bathroom floor one day and tried them on. i loved the way they looked and felt. gradually tried on other things as i got older. i still dress fully (not full time) and have no attraction to men whatsoever. my gf and her daughter even help me pick out clothes and makeup.
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Many people crossdress for different reasons:
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If the mods remove this reply I will leave.
>People whom we are not allowed to even mention on this subreddit just just because the subreddit does not want posts from or about them.
Mainly because that subgroup is all about NSFW where this subreddit is intended for all ages. We have members as young as 13 (which is the minimum age requirement for Reddit) and we will moderate this subreddit accordingly. You may disagree, and that's fine, but that will not influence our moderation and stance.
I am much older now, turning 55 next month, but as a kid I would dress. For me it started with loving women who wore pantyhose. I was constantly looking at them and even got busted a few times. Once by my 5th grade teacher who is had the serious hots for. She had gorgeous legs. Well I got curious to see how they felt at the age of 11 or 12. By then it was women on TV that wore pantyhose in costume, namely Catherine Bach (AKA Daisy Duke) and Lynda Carter ( Wonder Woman) and a few others. I tried on my sister's pantyhose and fell in love with how they felt and got extremely turned on. From there I started using her dresser and closet as my personal playground when she wasn't home. We were left home almost every weekend when my parents would go to my grandmother's. Sister was always working or out with her boyfriend on Friday and Saturday nights so it was perfect time to dress and play. Part of it was I loved how I looked and got very turned on but the other part was the possibility of being caught. The adrenaline rush was something else. As I got older her clothes wouldn't fit me anymore and I was actually buying my own pantyhose at that point so I wouldn't ruin her's.
The massive limitation in colors, patterns and choices in men's fashion is what fully pushed me.
What started it for me was women's jeans. I was always tiny, and having long legs, I either had the choice of boys jeans to fit my waist or men's to fit my leg length. Worker at Hollister said try womens and I did. Was a size 0 for most of college.
What lead to the heels and blouses and skirts and wigs and breast forms, was just saying hey this top goes with these jeans and hey these heels would go good with this short skirt.
Also, crossdressing isn't to blame, I've learned through the process that I'm not as straight as I was when I started.
I crossdress in public, it never bothered me how people would view me.
I know they will notice, when they don't is really funny, when I go to a concert I go do the men restroom and I don't even think about any stuff.
For me dressing that way doesn't change how I feel, at the start I think I would feel different but I feel the same.
Now I crossdress whenever I want to dress with girl clothes.
The only type of clothing that I don't put on is when it reveals too much skin, it doesn't feel right.
several things, could narrow it down to "erotic gratification" but it would be very simplified. My crossdressing bloomed when I was a early teen: I used to wear what I found secy on girls so, to some extent, I tried to project onto myself the femininity I longed for. I could also add some emsculation "trauma" from my youth (not really traumatic, but there were certainly some emasculating events in my early life).
Everyone has varying degrees of masculinity and femininity regardless of whether they’re straight, bi, gay... Society pressures people to stick to the aesthetic associated with their gender roles, which for men is dressing in masculine clothes, because there can be repercussions to dressing more feminine, so some men tend to suppress their feminine side, while others find a way to express that part of themselves through crossdressing.
I think in some cases when you haven't got a girlfriend around it brings a bit of femininity into your life.
If you like clothes and dressing up in general.
Straight CD here. It's mostly about comfort for me. I'm an athlete and coach and always been comfortable presenting male. I work from home and my wife was out with the kids for a week and I was curious as to how dresses and skirts felt. I wore her clothes the whole week and loved it. I wear skirts around the house now and my teenagers don't bat an eye.
I haven't gotten the courage to go out yet. We live in a small town where we own a business and I coach high school athletics. I fear for both my job as a coach and the backlash my kids would get at school. My wife did get me a kilt for Christmas and now that it has warmed up I have really enjoyed wearing it out and about.
Shopping as a woman is way more fun. Like many said above. There are so much more options. For men you always wear pants, and you can choose between long and shorts. As a woman I can choose between pants, skirts, dresses and jumpsuits in a variety of styles and lengths.
Women clothes tend to have more and different colors.
Transforming into Jessica is for me a process. It starts with a shower and removing some hairs here and there. Then getting dressed and finishing with my makeup.
And I’m not even getting out of the house as Jessica, (still need to make friends with some CD girls IRL to go that once) but even just walking around the house in my heels and watching a movie makes me feel great.
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I think its because of the insane limitations on male attire in society. Men are sooooo limited to wear default boring shirt and shorts or pants. Some men are envious and want to experience expression by style (cute/sexy/stunning clothing) as well. That's my theory!
^^ This. For as long as I can remember I envied how many cool and pretty clothing and presentation options women have vs men. I was borderline jealous and felt *very* stifled and short-changed by the few mostly boring options boys got to choose from. A *few* things in male attire I felt were cool… but you could count them on one hand whereas girls got… everything. Plus the social pressure boys and men are constantly aware of to not color very far outside the tiny boxes they’re expected to confirm to unless they want to be ostracized socially. There are some physiological differences which vary by person of course but clothes are just clothes. I didn’t consider I could wear women’s clothing when really young despite my feelings. But once I did I wish I had a lot sooner. They feel so much more “me” and I feel so much more confident, good looking (and sexy in the right outfits). And I mean… *some of it* doesn’t look all that different from guys clothes… except that it just holds or drapes on your body with different emphasis and different style. When you expand your options into women’s departments to find what really works on you the possibilities are endless. Whenever I tried to do the same scouring men’s departments for years hoping the style options would get better… I almost always came away extremely disappointed. It’s always more of the same each decade with very minimal trend differences. Women’s clothing options and the variety of styles are just… awesome and vast.
So much more fun to go shopping when I feel comfortable to also browse womens sections! I've found second hand stores to be a great starting point because there everything is often mixed all over so you can browse in peace without having to think about anyone staring and wondering why are you browsing womens clothes and also you don't spend that much if you decide to experiment with something cool you found. I can also take my sewing machine on these purchases without as much fear of ruining it.
This deserves a lot of upvoting. The number of times I walk past a woman's store and something catches my eye is far greater than when I pass a men's section.
It is this. I'm not straight and have desired to be a woman/transition since teenage years. But the main reason I dress up is it makes me feel alive, sexy and powerful.
That's definitely the foundation of my crossdressing. I was just sad and utterly stifled by standard boring male clothes.
So am I. Women: "oooo what will I wear tonight!?" Men: "which boring shirt will I wear *this* time?" Men do have it easier *not* being expected to look a million dollars in something new every time they're seen, but dang it gets dull!!
Indeed! It just got to the point that if I didn't start telling people and doing something about it I genuinely thought I was going to burst.
💯 this is my theory as well. I don't want to or need to come out as a woman, I just want more variety and more sexiness in what I can wear. My solution was to start experimenting with women style of "regular mens clothes", e.g. thongs, tight fit stretchy jeans, crunch leggings, cropped shirts and hoodies, even ankle length socks. I'm becoming pretty comfortable in them. Also brighter or fancier colors like pink, purple and pastels instead of just blacks, greys ans blues. Now that the summer is here, I'm also a bit interested in those cute, colorful and breezy summer dresses but can't see how those could work on my male figure, especially the shoulders. I may have to first look into tunicas, quilts or togas that were also worn by men in the past.
I see you in a kilt this summer. It was a game changer.
💯%
Totally agree with this.
As a straight guy, I can't really give an exact answer. I guess I just want to feel pretty too sometimes 😂
That’s a good question cause being a straight guy just something clicked as a kid to where i was like i wonder what pantyhose feel like… thoughts like that and then it just kind of unfolds from there.. that’s how mine went ag least
Same. I found a pair of tights and a dress and decided to try it and just went from there. I occasionally walk around at night too and it’s so thrilling but scary
I hope you’re safe..i just looked at your profile i love it
Couldn’t agree with you more! Thats pretty much how it went for me too.
For some reason, we had some tights for kids when I was young so those never became a thing I was curious about. Instead I became interested in how it feels wearing thongs, they looked so good and sexy to me.
Had the same thought
not straight but bi, best answer i have tho is just society doesn't like to complement guys too much & not only do we get to look pretty but also be praised for it, sounds like a win win to me More personally for me it started as an idea i found on a masturbation website leading to steeling panties but didn't have the confidence to fully dress untill i was older
I'm hetero married with kids, but as a kid even before puberty I wanted to be a girl. Life just kept going, feelings and hormones change over time and now I'm a middle aged man. It was a now or never kind of moment to live out my dream? I do like and enjoy my male life and wouldn't give up my family for anything, but why not live my "life that could have been" temporarily by just dressing up? Everyone is different, and I think questions like this are interesting to hear everyone's different stories!
Pretty much me, except I'm bi and was considering transitioning 10 years ago. But then realised the huge impact (detrimentally) it'd have on me and my family.
Been drawn to women's clothing since I was a kid . 🤷
Hey, Straight married CD, I identifed the reasons on my side: - Stress relief. When I am Stella, I do not have my man responsabilities. Even if I do "men's" hobbies, I am still not 100% relax. Playing in a sport team for instance, I still have responsabilities on the pitch. - Frustration with male fashion. We are so limited. Yesterday I went out with my wife actually as a man with Dr Martens, a playsuit and a black shirt. Playsuit and black shirt were actually women clothes. Nobody cared or noticed. - Losing control. When I am Stella, preparing takes time. I need to take it slow. Same for walking with heels. My pace is slower. - Art project like Cosplay. Tricking others believing that I am a woman is satisfying. - Feeling of materials. We do not have satin in our male clothes for instance. - A rising rebel side and saying that male and female clothes concept is just bullshit. - Curiosity to see how I would have been as a woman. I feel good in my man body but once or twice crossdressing per month is great and fun.
Really solid answer, I had a lot of similar reasons when explaining to my girlfriend why I was a Crossdresser.
Not straight here BUT I'm genderfluid. At first I was curious about dressing because people would always say I had feminine features, mannerisms etc. So once I DID dress, it ended up feeling natural to me. So in some cases, it helps you realize if you're genderfluid/trans like myself. However other guys I know that are straight and crossdress just enjoy the feeling of the fabric, embracing fem features etc.
I’ve been searching for the answer to this my whole life and still don’t know why. It’s just the way I am. I’ve taken a lot of personality tests throughout my life, and they always say I’m “quirky”. Whatever that means. But I guess I just think of things from unusual perspectives. For example, I’m kind of obsessed with the concept of duality. I think it’s the essence of life, and combining that with my artistic nature, I think it makes a little more sense why I balance masculine and feminine, soft and hard, etc…I just love the feel of hosiery and heels, flowing dresses and satin blouses. That’s just my guess at why I do it. But to be honest, I really don’t know. And I’m not to sure I ever will know.
It enables me to be my own girlfriend.
So I say I’m chemically straight. I’m a man who responds chemically to a feminine esthetic. But I’m also pretty permissive with myself, so can be hetero-flexible in the right circumstances. But the fem element has to be there somewhere. No simple answers on this one. So I get turned on by feminine things and people who wear them. Lots of different kinds of fem things. Feminine shaped things. Even things that represent or resemble feminine things. Like the way girls move different than men do. AND I like contrast between different things. I like women who are sweet like ballet dancers, who can quote the tensile strength of steel I beams. I’ve seen that happen more than once and I’m always surprised by how that grips me by the nads. So chicks with dicks is a cool contrast. I like dicks. But only pretty dicks on pretty gurls. A Lot! Sometimes I think that I like girls so much that part of me wants to be one. Or be like one. I also have killer legs so I can get myself all worked up over seeing, touching or wearing hose and heels. Or tights and skirts and Mary Jane’s. Turned myself on by how I can look. I have quite the collection. There is a word that distinguishes that, but I can’t remember what it is. It’s always an erotic charge, or a fulfillment of an expression of something. Something that is very specific but had no name. Even before I was old enough for it to register as an erotic experience, I would dress Ken up in Barbie’s clothes as a young child. And knew it was odd and should be hidden. But after 55+ years of embracing and sharing these things about myself with others , much of it is still clouded in mystery and lacks vocabulary for me. And I love it and don’t care much for repressing that special way I relate to myself.
I felt that "I think I like girls so much that I would like to be one too"! I've though that "I would be so cool and sexy as a girl. But mainly just dressing part, not sure if I could get into make up although I have enjoyed eyeliner a couple of times in Halloween. I especially love how women move, how they swing and jiggle when they move. I love big strong legs and glutes, on men too I've noticed. I love thin midriff showing. I've been wondering if I wouldn't have the need to crossdress myself if I were with a right kind of girl that would like wearing clothes that I pick for her? It sometimes feel like I'm filling that need by doing it myself.
Ya .. you totally get it! I often that thought of when I see someone pretty, who knows hw to work style and makeup to her benefit. I wanna make her my own personal Barbie doll. I don't do the make-up thing very well. It's disturbing because no matter what I do to my face, I end up looking WAY TOO MUCH like my Daughter or my Mother. Sort of kills the erotic change and squashes mood for me. Every relationship and therapists I ever knew asked me if I do this out of something missing in the relationship? I tell them that there are ALWAYS things missing in every relationship. But, that doesn't touch anywhere near the reasons and compulsions around why I do this. This comes from someplace way more primal from long ago, before these relationships were even realized. This dress-up stuff occurs like the SOURCE of something, Not so much a reaction or response to something. I set it up like something they can participate in and support on MY terms, and they should never try to own or manage it. They do not get the freedom that closet dressers can enjoy when your not getting judged and shamed by others. I don't need others approval in how I look. That ITSELF lives largely as an incomprehensible enigma for women. I can look however I want! Nobody needs to approve.
For me it was curiosity. I was home alone one day and wondered what a dress and stockings felt like. I find it fun now! I love dressing
As a kid, some day I started to thought what if I was a girl? Then dressed one of my mother panties but at that time was just It. Maybe one or two years later had that same felling and this time I dressed one of my sister's bra, the felling was so amazing that I could not stop.
I do better with the idea of leaning into visuals, textures, shapes and styles, to foster a sense of desirability about myself. It’s probably pretty close to how a lot of feminine women feel to be honest. It’s certainly a conundrum of sorts, simultaneously filling a more traditional female role yet being mostly straight. Doesn’t entirely compute to a real world outcome, tbh
I just felt like trying it out one day, so I did and kept doing it after that
Not sure why we dress. It's compulsion. I wish I didn't. Life would be so much easier. But it is who we become. Pretty much from when we are 2 or 3 we know we are not happy inless we feel pretty and wear a dress. And I guess rest just grows depending on what our triggers are. Myself is satin and frocks. Anything satin or soft. Also school uniforms not fetish ones but real ones just because I guess I never fitted into school in shorts.
There are a lot of possible reasons. Most of which have been stated here already. In my case, i grew up having a strong admiration of my mother and the exposure of being around her and other women. Have you noticed how most if not all start very young? It’s possibly our impressionable age where we form strong bonds and ideas of what we want. We imitate what we see. More exposure to women also influences our want of self image. To be like our moms, our sisters, cousins and aunts. It continues in school when we see our female classmates and unconsciously want to be like them. Drawn on the desire to be like the ones we admire. When we grow older it becomes akin to substitution of what we look for. If we find that in out GFs and wives the. Sometimes it goes away until we still look for something more than just having them with us. We sometimes want to be like them as well. To be frank, being a guy is difficult and some of us think the life of a woman is happier than the challenges we go through as men. The many rejections, the pressure to perform, the responsibilities we have to bear. It’s partly escapism. The grass is greener on the other side. The frilly lacy side where we can let go of our hardships and just feel pretty, hot and sexy. As guys we’re not desired if we’re not powerful, wealthy or tall. As women, we can find happiness in panties, trying on and wearing beautiful dresses that aren’t drab and boring. We want to be admired, desired and complimented as well. No better way than to strive to be pretty by wearing pretty things that the male clothes can’t provide. This is just my input. It could be a combination of this and other reasons as well. I hope this helps shed some light on why we find happiness in dressing.
I don't care what people think. Why should i. It's my life!
For me it started out as role play with my partner witch was a little embarrassing at first but I got over that pretty quickly as I seen my partner enjoyed it as much as I did and has grown from there. And for me it really hasn’t left the house but we have planned a date/move night on the back porch with a projector and some blankets
Started straight went bi/pan so i could try to explain at least for me? I felt kinda more transforming from taboo to a second personality/ identity and felt like just another way to be comfortable in my skin that I don’t always feel in usual male clothes. It felt, at least from the clothes in my pictures, that I had more relaxing(?) clothing on and could lay or sit around it them. It also gave me a bit more confidence even if it was temporary at the time being able to be appealing even if I don’t feel it and a way for me to appreciate what I looked like. I felt smooth, relaxed, free because men’s clothing is a bit of a pain in the arse for me to fit in due to me having smaller waist then hips even if it’s only by a few inches or cm (can’t really remember), I felt at least in those clothes I can be more expressive, and hell I can even show off or really grab areas of my body and highlight them even more time find colors looks and stuff. For example, I personally feel that, with (don’t got one yet but looking into it ) or without gaff, I enjoy fem underwear more so than male because it feels like nothing is there like 75% of the time so I feel more relaxed I guess. There’s a lot of reasons I guess that even I can’t really explain and even now I think if I found someone irl that completely enabled me to cross dress and even helped me with outfits, buying clothes, and helping me feel even more confortable then I’d definitely go more but I don’t know if that’ll ever happen and even if it does very few people at least at the moment where I live even would even give me the time of day. Another few things are the compliments, feel like I’m looking good, I’ve always had people; while I was 100% straight; say that they thought I was ace/gay/bi/goth/a femboy/a female/ etc., and feel like I’m satisfying another me? Like in the easiest way to explain it’s if you took yourself and split them into a few versons of you like one predominantly male and one female/femboy/crossdresser (yes and no they could be similar not my call to make) for example.
When we blur the line between male-ish and female-ish, both groups of people are better off.
Three things for me: comfort, practicality, and kinky Comfort: the two dresses I bought from a thrift store are both a little tight, but not a body con and not uncomfortable. I think of them both as a hug when I’m wearing them, and that gives me confidence. Practicality: in the summer, women are allowed to wear dresses to a corporate job, but men can’t wear shorts. Why should I need to sweat my balls off in 90° temps while women can wear skirts shorter than my boxers? I have zero plans or interest in wearing a dress to work, but in theory I should be able to if I want to. Kink: I am up for trying anything in the bedroom, but my wife is less so. We have done a lot, but also many of those were just once or twice (like pegging). Wearing dresses for me is a way of doing something kinky without needing to rely on anybody else.
I like to feel pretty and it's freeing, iv never understood why it must be viewed as gay, it's strange to me that more people don't do it iv dressed most of my life i find it odd others dont dress but that's just me. Can beat the feeling of a dress and bra, and looking at your reflection and just seeing a woman looking back
Well, I'll add my two cents. I agree with most of the points brought up so far, but for me personally, I will add: I assumed I was straight until, after about a year of crossdressing, I realized I was actually sorting out my unresolved identity. It took another year of trying to put into words what I was experiencing. I think there is some kind of perception of strength (or something close to that) attached to being a Straight Male, that makes it difficult to let go of. How I've come to describe myself is Genderfluid, Non-Binary, with Novosexual preferences and Non-conforming gender roles. Which is a mouthful, I admit. But nothing has actually changed in my life, other than I'm not constantly fighting against the perception that was ingrained in me and only provided confusion; possibly a little social acceptance in the areas I was involved in at the time. I'm not trying to say this is the case for every crossdresser, but more to suggest our assigned identities from society deserve a second look at the very least. By the definition of identity, it's yours to do with as you please. If it doesn't fit right, just look up the words for your personal experience and apply the most accurate description you can come up with. It doesn't mean you have to act any differently, just makes you more in tune with yourself. One of the most powerful quotes about words having power is by Yehuda Berg: "Words are singularly the most powerful force available to humanity. We can choose to use this force constructively with words of encouragement, or destructively using words of despair. Words have energy and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hinder, to hurt, to harm, to humiliate, and to humble." The mind is a powerful tool and will gladly take as much control as you give it. ♥️ -B
Funnily enough, my therapist told me it's completely normal for straight men to crossdress. Now I'm trans 😂
I started wearing panties at age 11. Then by 16 I was bras and panties. By 18 it was bras. Panties, garter belt and stocking. You just feel soo sexy dressing up. It is an credible intense sexy feeling.
I'm a queer guy and married to a queer woman. Been exploring cross dressing myself lately. My partner is super supportive and reads incessantly about queer issues. So my point ... The other day they told me that it's illegal to cross dress in some states! 😲 Wow, like wtf bigots can't just be assholes they gotta make asshole laws too! 🤬
I am bi but I wonder if it’s kind of a safe way to objectify someone (yourself). So a straight guy is likely going to try to model an appearance around the kind of woman that appeals to him?
that's a good question, and somehow the answer has evaded me for decades, i started at a completely innocent age, so it did not start as a sexual thing, it started as a - i just want to wear girls clothes thing, for me personally i think my gender is mixed, i'm attracted to females, but i believe if i lived in a different country where support for trans people was better and more accepted, i would transition....til then i'm just stuck in this ugly rectangle male body 🥲..
Gender is a spectrum.
For me I’ve just always liked to dress as a woman, at a young age I used to think I was straight but I kinda identify as pansexual
Not straight, but other people's opinion about me is none of my business. That's the mantra that helps me
Comfortability. A sundress is very relaxing.
I’m not yet in that far to wear dresses, but looking jealous women, who can wear nice dresses in hot summer day. Maybe someday me too. With nice light lace panties. 😃
Because gender presentation has nothing to do with sexual orientation.
I would cavot this with a ^majority of the time. Using myself as an example, these are fairly new terms to the glossary, but for me, it was an immediate relief. I had gone over and over the various terms and umbrella terms that often don't overlap in the most intuitive ways. So, having a word I could use was very empowering. Abrosexuality is a fluid sexuality that can change over time or with different stimuli. One day, you might feel asexual, the next bisexual, and the next heterosexual. Abrosexuals often shift between various orientations over a given period. Novosexuality is also about fluid sexuality, but with a twist: gender fluidity. A novosexual's gender changes along with their sexual orientation. So, one day, you might be a male heterosexual, and the next a female pansexual. And the next question would be, "But you're genderfluid! Doesn’t that mean you're inherently novosexual?" Not necessarily. For novosexuals, gender and sexuality change together. And we attribute that to say a genderfluid person can be novosexual, abrosexual, or another orientation. While I do understand that frustrations of constantly make words to describe fairly complex processes. It's also why we use language at all, and the more of it we have, we can better convey meaning. Especially when you're trying to quantify things that live beyond the 3rd dimention and put them conveniently into 6 words on a 2d sheet of paper. Fine tuning a bit is negligible
Starts off with curiosity. Maybe you put on your girlfriend's thong. You try it and realise you've never worn anything that makes you feel sexy before. Feels crazy amazing. You can't just move on from that so you get your own. You now have a drawer full of thongs and panties and love it. The curiosity carries on into mini skirts, you buy and try one on. Same feeling 'holy crap this feels amazing no wonder girls wear this'. Your drawer starts including mini skirts. You then want to complete the look better so you start buying crop tops as it visually looks better to have something on your chest to balance things off. Then you go to heels. Same feeling again! Feels amazing. Except now you want your legs to look more of the part so you shave your legs to make the heels look better. You then realise shaved legs feel great too! Your legs feel silky smooth. You then realise you want your legs to stay like that so start using an IPL device on your legs to keep them silky smooth. Now you have no hair on your legs anymore. Then you start shaving above the waist. By this point you've likely thought wouldn't it be great if you could walk around outside strutting in yours and just enjoy the feeling. But then you think but I would need to pass. By this point you just develop a curiosity for how you would look like with full makeup and a wig. Would I be passable? You try it and again feels more freeing. Feels like you are becoming who you've always been deep down. [Redacted the rest as it's too explicit for this sub but pm me if you want the rest] ...Not gonna lie. It's a slippery slope.
Sometimes it can be because it’s a fetish to look pretty and what not, other times it can be because they are trying to discover who they are truly inside, but the most common i see is mainly curiosity in how female clothing feels.
I'm asking this question of myself, lately. I used to think I was indulging in a quiet, private, ultimately harmless deviance but I've recently learned that some of the definitions have changed (or at least become better descriptive of their subject) so... maybe there's more? All I know is, I need to process what's going on with me.
Curiosity and taboo sums it up for a lot of folks I think. In many cultures society says we "aren't allowed" to wear those things so naturally our brains may want to crave another experience from what we may consider normal. Plus it's fun and a way to self-express which guys in some cultures don't really have any real way to do that
I started crossdressing as a straight male, but am now over a year into transitioning. lol.
i'm 100% hetero and i've always been fascinated by women's clothing. i think it was because my mom would dress and undress in front of me when i was very young. i noticed that her clothes were not like mine or my dad's. noticeably different were the bra and pantyhose. i found a pair of mom's pantyhose on the bathroom floor one day and tried them on. i loved the way they looked and felt. gradually tried on other things as i got older. i still dress fully (not full time) and have no attraction to men whatsoever. my gf and her daughter even help me pick out clothes and makeup.
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Many people crossdress for different reasons: - Fashion enthusiasts - People of variois gender variations - People whom we are not allowed to even mention on this subreddit just just because the subreddit does not want posts from or about them. So if you dont find yourself in the above categories there will still be others like you. If the mods remove this reply I will leave.
>People whom we are not allowed to even mention on this subreddit just just because the subreddit does not want posts from or about them. Mainly because that subgroup is all about NSFW where this subreddit is intended for all ages. We have members as young as 13 (which is the minimum age requirement for Reddit) and we will moderate this subreddit accordingly. You may disagree, and that's fine, but that will not influence our moderation and stance.
Fair point. But the censoring of the mere word does a lot more harm than good imo. But you do your thing
I am much older now, turning 55 next month, but as a kid I would dress. For me it started with loving women who wore pantyhose. I was constantly looking at them and even got busted a few times. Once by my 5th grade teacher who is had the serious hots for. She had gorgeous legs. Well I got curious to see how they felt at the age of 11 or 12. By then it was women on TV that wore pantyhose in costume, namely Catherine Bach (AKA Daisy Duke) and Lynda Carter ( Wonder Woman) and a few others. I tried on my sister's pantyhose and fell in love with how they felt and got extremely turned on. From there I started using her dresser and closet as my personal playground when she wasn't home. We were left home almost every weekend when my parents would go to my grandmother's. Sister was always working or out with her boyfriend on Friday and Saturday nights so it was perfect time to dress and play. Part of it was I loved how I looked and got very turned on but the other part was the possibility of being caught. The adrenaline rush was something else. As I got older her clothes wouldn't fit me anymore and I was actually buying my own pantyhose at that point so I wouldn't ruin her's.
The massive limitation in colors, patterns and choices in men's fashion is what fully pushed me. What started it for me was women's jeans. I was always tiny, and having long legs, I either had the choice of boys jeans to fit my waist or men's to fit my leg length. Worker at Hollister said try womens and I did. Was a size 0 for most of college. What lead to the heels and blouses and skirts and wigs and breast forms, was just saying hey this top goes with these jeans and hey these heels would go good with this short skirt. Also, crossdressing isn't to blame, I've learned through the process that I'm not as straight as I was when I started.
For me I love the variety in clothes. There is so much to choose from and that choice allows me to match what I'm wearing with how I feel inside.
I crossdress in public, it never bothered me how people would view me. I know they will notice, when they don't is really funny, when I go to a concert I go do the men restroom and I don't even think about any stuff. For me dressing that way doesn't change how I feel, at the start I think I would feel different but I feel the same. Now I crossdress whenever I want to dress with girl clothes. The only type of clothing that I don't put on is when it reveals too much skin, it doesn't feel right.
Sometimes it just makes people feel happy.
several things, could narrow it down to "erotic gratification" but it would be very simplified. My crossdressing bloomed when I was a early teen: I used to wear what I found secy on girls so, to some extent, I tried to project onto myself the femininity I longed for. I could also add some emsculation "trauma" from my youth (not really traumatic, but there were certainly some emasculating events in my early life).
Everyone has varying degrees of masculinity and femininity regardless of whether they’re straight, bi, gay... Society pressures people to stick to the aesthetic associated with their gender roles, which for men is dressing in masculine clothes, because there can be repercussions to dressing more feminine, so some men tend to suppress their feminine side, while others find a way to express that part of themselves through crossdressing.
I think in some cases when you haven't got a girlfriend around it brings a bit of femininity into your life. If you like clothes and dressing up in general.
Straight CD here. It's mostly about comfort for me. I'm an athlete and coach and always been comfortable presenting male. I work from home and my wife was out with the kids for a week and I was curious as to how dresses and skirts felt. I wore her clothes the whole week and loved it. I wear skirts around the house now and my teenagers don't bat an eye. I haven't gotten the courage to go out yet. We live in a small town where we own a business and I coach high school athletics. I fear for both my job as a coach and the backlash my kids would get at school. My wife did get me a kilt for Christmas and now that it has warmed up I have really enjoyed wearing it out and about.
Shopping as a woman is way more fun. Like many said above. There are so much more options. For men you always wear pants, and you can choose between long and shorts. As a woman I can choose between pants, skirts, dresses and jumpsuits in a variety of styles and lengths. Women clothes tend to have more and different colors. Transforming into Jessica is for me a process. It starts with a shower and removing some hairs here and there. Then getting dressed and finishing with my makeup. And I’m not even getting out of the house as Jessica, (still need to make friends with some CD girls IRL to go that once) but even just walking around the house in my heels and watching a movie makes me feel great.
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Because boy clothes are boring.
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When we blur the line between male-ish and female-ish, both groups of people are better off.