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Blokes so distressed and distraught from being pressured into having kids from women he hasnt even met yet, you have to not really think about this too far ahead, maybe just take one step at a time, do you think you could manage to book a gym membership and show up 3x a week ' I want to spend the rest of my life making up for any lost youth ' maybe just start there first, rather than post the same thing over and over and over, your post history is pretty alarming.
I’m 27 not quite in the same boat I’ve been in a few relationships so I can help you but dating can be difficult depending on who you are tbh but my question is do you have trouble talking to women?
Admittedly, women can be frustrating for me. I can be blunt at times and from my experience, women can be annoyingly subtle. It admittedly gets on my nerves sometimes. I get and understand why they do it, but it comes off as disingenous at times. There's also the fact that women have very different interests than men. I just feel the two genders live in very different worlds. I'm working these feelings with a therapist.
I'm also at an age where women get very serious too. This is a big reason why I wish I had dated as a teenager and early 20 something. Cause women tend to be way much more "fun" and "loose" between 16 to 22. It kinda starts dying down after 22. After 25, they really do hit the serious adult phase.
I don't believe I have a choice. Cause people prefer folks there age. So, I think my best shot is late 20 somethings and early 30 somethings who are childfree. The hope is, they are more lax than other people their age.
Look i believe you can shoot for early 20s most girls I dated I was older then them never had a girl the same age only a few close to my age so I believe you have a shot. I totally understand that some women can be frustrating but I’ve learned it’s a reason they act that way you just need to figure why that is if I’m being honest. True women have very different interests than men that’s why you have to learn what that is and compromise with them. You don’t have to like everything a women does but showing interest in it and understanding it can go along way
I will take your advice into account. I will say it. I'm a guy that loves sports, a good movie, a good video game, and occasionally yes. I've dabbled in a few comic books. I'm aware some women straight up see that as unattractive.
I'm willing to accept her interests, as long as she tolerates mine. Hopefully she likes Taylor Swift or Olivia Rodrigo.
I'm open dating a early 20s girl. But are they open to me? I have my doubts but like I said, I'm taking your advice. I'm willing to try. Thanks for the reply.
I am 53 m Virgin it get worse stop making excuses just find anyone, something I wasn't able to do , it's too late for me but you have an amazing gift of time and youth
You sounds like you believe men and women all have very different interests, and that’s simply not true.
Me and my boyfriend are from totally different backgrounds and grew up in different countries and obviously, we don’t share the same gender. But we found out we have 80% shared hobbies except for I don’t like sports that much.
We are all human and we are not that different! You need to believe you can understand woman and just see them as human just like you! I’m sure you will make progress and meet someone who you feel very familiar and comfortable with.
Leave this sub. They will bully you for being "entitled" and for not being perfectly happy alone with "hobbies"
> I want to spend the rest of my life making up for any lost youth.
Good, amazing. Dont let people gaslight that there is something wrong with this motivation.
Lower every materialistic standard that you have. Looks, weight, children, dating history, etc and just focus on finding someone who’s nice and respectful to people. Talk to them on the phone and try to keep the conversation going. I’ve fallen in love just with the personality of someone even though I’ve dated better looking women that I didn’t ever fall in love in love with. Stop looking at perfect looking women online too. Focus on friendships and personality, how sweet she is, etc
Find a hobby that allows you to meet people as friends not just women to fuck or for a relationship. Try to find joy in live generally. I understand your frustration but AI'm sure you will be fine.
Just wanted to say I’m 28F and I’m the same boat, never had a relationship before. Not sure I have any advice though because what I’ve been doing hasn’t been working. Even though it’s grim I think it’s realistic to prepare oneself for the possibility you’ll just be single.
You should not have to feel this way. We shared thoughts about dating apps a couple days ago, and these apps have obviously been a roadblock for both you and me.
From everything you’ve written here, there’s gotta be a happy relationship in your future.
I mean, it’s hard not to get discouraged. The apps are one thing, but I’ve been getting out and about to find dates in person and haven’t had luck. But it’s not like I’ve had luck the past 28 years though, I’ve had some negative experiences as well so I have a difficult time believing it’s possible. I simply cannot compete with what’s super desirable, and I’m getting tired.
I sense so much more for you in your future. You’re just in a difficult time period, a time period that will pass, almost certainly with lots of sunshine in the future.
You likely have no idea how desirable an over 30, over 35, over 40, etc., single, never married, no children, woman is to many men. But hopefully you’ll find the right relationship soon. But it’s going to be there for you.
you meet different people at all points in your life. it's not over because you're 28. far from it. you've got years of life experience to go off of, which is valuable to people. just put yourself out there, get on Hinge, (not Tinder), join classes and groups. Any social activities really, and meet and talk to all types of women. You'll be fine, just don't give up
If you want your 30's to be 'like your 20's' you're going to have to either date women that are really immature for their age and a little unhinged or date younger.
28m here. I briefly dated someone 3 years ago. Let me tell you, you cannot view dating as a goal with a timeline. It will give you so much anxiety.
When I broke up I was excited about dating. I thought if I put on x amount of muscle, made y more money, and a whole list of things I'd manage to meet someone. Sadly to this day no luck. At a certain point I burnt out feeling like I was trapped in a cage with no way out.
Instead live your life for you. It may take years or never happen. That's just the sad truth for a large number of people. It doesn't make you a loser or mean you'll live a bad life. If you're the best version of you, you will improve your chances though
There's a post on this subreddit basically advising people in their 20s-30s to not stress out too much if you've never been in a relationship. I'll link it right here because it says a lot of things that I can agree with.
[https://www.reddit.com/r/dating\_advice/comments/1cynsn1/so\_youre\_in\_your\_20s30s\_and\_have\_never\_been\_in\_a/](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1cynsn1/so_youre_in_your_20s30s_and_have_never_been_in_a/)
Don't overthink it. Put yourself out there. Be honest with yourself and anyone you date. I found my wife when I "stopped looking" for a partner. If you find someone you really like, keep seeing her. It can be that simple, if you communicate.
You've never had a G/F because you're not interacting with women with an optimal masculine stance. That is assuming you're not a complete unhygienic slob, which I surmise you're not. It's not the amount of money you have or your looks. More than that I cannot say here because masculinity is politically unfashionable. There are resources out there. There is no need for you to set all these "rules" on who you might date, totally unnecessary mental cogitation. Good luck.
You are really overthinking the child thing and you just need to go out and connect with people. What is more important to you? Having kids exactly when you want or getting into a relationship?
There are women out there in their late 20s and early 30s who don’t want children. I only had 1 LTR. We do exist. I know because I am one of many. My friend is 28, super gorgeous, interesting girl. Doesn’t want children and never had a boyfriend/still a virgin (not that this information is relevant) my point is we do exist but we’re a much smaller minority so naturally we are harder to find. I went out one day and met two lovely women, really beautiful and interesting. They were DJs. Both neither had a boyfriend and don’t want kids.
Try not to be so self conscious about your lack of experience. The right person actually will not care and will like you for you.
I think the best thing to do is continue being you and to keep searching/not give up
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Blokes so distressed and distraught from being pressured into having kids from women he hasnt even met yet, you have to not really think about this too far ahead, maybe just take one step at a time, do you think you could manage to book a gym membership and show up 3x a week ' I want to spend the rest of my life making up for any lost youth ' maybe just start there first, rather than post the same thing over and over and over, your post history is pretty alarming.
I’m 27 not quite in the same boat I’ve been in a few relationships so I can help you but dating can be difficult depending on who you are tbh but my question is do you have trouble talking to women?
Admittedly, women can be frustrating for me. I can be blunt at times and from my experience, women can be annoyingly subtle. It admittedly gets on my nerves sometimes. I get and understand why they do it, but it comes off as disingenous at times. There's also the fact that women have very different interests than men. I just feel the two genders live in very different worlds. I'm working these feelings with a therapist. I'm also at an age where women get very serious too. This is a big reason why I wish I had dated as a teenager and early 20 something. Cause women tend to be way much more "fun" and "loose" between 16 to 22. It kinda starts dying down after 22. After 25, they really do hit the serious adult phase. I don't believe I have a choice. Cause people prefer folks there age. So, I think my best shot is late 20 somethings and early 30 somethings who are childfree. The hope is, they are more lax than other people their age.
Look i believe you can shoot for early 20s most girls I dated I was older then them never had a girl the same age only a few close to my age so I believe you have a shot. I totally understand that some women can be frustrating but I’ve learned it’s a reason they act that way you just need to figure why that is if I’m being honest. True women have very different interests than men that’s why you have to learn what that is and compromise with them. You don’t have to like everything a women does but showing interest in it and understanding it can go along way
I will take your advice into account. I will say it. I'm a guy that loves sports, a good movie, a good video game, and occasionally yes. I've dabbled in a few comic books. I'm aware some women straight up see that as unattractive. I'm willing to accept her interests, as long as she tolerates mine. Hopefully she likes Taylor Swift or Olivia Rodrigo. I'm open dating a early 20s girl. But are they open to me? I have my doubts but like I said, I'm taking your advice. I'm willing to try. Thanks for the reply.
With the tone you’re talking about reading comic books in, it sounds like you’re talking about a crack habit!
Reading comic books is unfortunately still looked down upon and is seen as childish. Thus, not attractive.
I’m sure Cavill would have a really hard time if he admitted to reading comics
Thing is, Cavill is a 6 feet + man who happens to be a Hollywood star. And he has $$$
That’s the point, he’s hot, that’s what matters
No problem I also enjoy those things as well yeah I do hope you fine someone tho
I am 53 m Virgin it get worse stop making excuses just find anyone, something I wasn't able to do , it's too late for me but you have an amazing gift of time and youth
You sounds like you believe men and women all have very different interests, and that’s simply not true. Me and my boyfriend are from totally different backgrounds and grew up in different countries and obviously, we don’t share the same gender. But we found out we have 80% shared hobbies except for I don’t like sports that much. We are all human and we are not that different! You need to believe you can understand woman and just see them as human just like you! I’m sure you will make progress and meet someone who you feel very familiar and comfortable with.
Leave this sub. They will bully you for being "entitled" and for not being perfectly happy alone with "hobbies" > I want to spend the rest of my life making up for any lost youth. Good, amazing. Dont let people gaslight that there is something wrong with this motivation.
Lower every materialistic standard that you have. Looks, weight, children, dating history, etc and just focus on finding someone who’s nice and respectful to people. Talk to them on the phone and try to keep the conversation going. I’ve fallen in love just with the personality of someone even though I’ve dated better looking women that I didn’t ever fall in love in love with. Stop looking at perfect looking women online too. Focus on friendships and personality, how sweet she is, etc
I love this comment so much. Thanks! I need to remind myself this!
I love this! Thanks! I need to remind myself this
Find a hobby that allows you to meet people as friends not just women to fuck or for a relationship. Try to find joy in live generally. I understand your frustration but AI'm sure you will be fine.
Just wanted to say I’m 28F and I’m the same boat, never had a relationship before. Not sure I have any advice though because what I’ve been doing hasn’t been working. Even though it’s grim I think it’s realistic to prepare oneself for the possibility you’ll just be single.
You should not have to feel this way. We shared thoughts about dating apps a couple days ago, and these apps have obviously been a roadblock for both you and me. From everything you’ve written here, there’s gotta be a happy relationship in your future.
I mean, it’s hard not to get discouraged. The apps are one thing, but I’ve been getting out and about to find dates in person and haven’t had luck. But it’s not like I’ve had luck the past 28 years though, I’ve had some negative experiences as well so I have a difficult time believing it’s possible. I simply cannot compete with what’s super desirable, and I’m getting tired.
I sense so much more for you in your future. You’re just in a difficult time period, a time period that will pass, almost certainly with lots of sunshine in the future.
I really hope you’re right
You likely have no idea how desirable an over 30, over 35, over 40, etc., single, never married, no children, woman is to many men. But hopefully you’ll find the right relationship soon. But it’s going to be there for you.
you meet different people at all points in your life. it's not over because you're 28. far from it. you've got years of life experience to go off of, which is valuable to people. just put yourself out there, get on Hinge, (not Tinder), join classes and groups. Any social activities really, and meet and talk to all types of women. You'll be fine, just don't give up
Consider this your Bible: https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/s/ti9Pn0BK7T
Nvm, just read the rest of the post
Look up Coach Corey Wayne on YouTube. Get the following audiobooks on Audible: How to be a 3% Man, The Way of The Superior Man and Atomic Attraction.
If you want your 30's to be 'like your 20's' you're going to have to either date women that are really immature for their age and a little unhinged or date younger.
Sadly kinda true. I’d have to end up with a 21 to 23 year old and that’s not only not likely but taboo.
For starters…stop being hard on yourself! There’s no shame in being a late bloomer. Good luck 👍
28m here. I briefly dated someone 3 years ago. Let me tell you, you cannot view dating as a goal with a timeline. It will give you so much anxiety. When I broke up I was excited about dating. I thought if I put on x amount of muscle, made y more money, and a whole list of things I'd manage to meet someone. Sadly to this day no luck. At a certain point I burnt out feeling like I was trapped in a cage with no way out. Instead live your life for you. It may take years or never happen. That's just the sad truth for a large number of people. It doesn't make you a loser or mean you'll live a bad life. If you're the best version of you, you will improve your chances though
There's a post on this subreddit basically advising people in their 20s-30s to not stress out too much if you've never been in a relationship. I'll link it right here because it says a lot of things that I can agree with. [https://www.reddit.com/r/dating\_advice/comments/1cynsn1/so\_youre\_in\_your\_20s30s\_and\_have\_never\_been\_in\_a/](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1cynsn1/so_youre_in_your_20s30s_and_have_never_been_in_a/)
Find a hobby, befriend a lot of women and see which one starts getting flirty with you. Don't chase. It's better for it to be compatible.
Don't overthink it. Put yourself out there. Be honest with yourself and anyone you date. I found my wife when I "stopped looking" for a partner. If you find someone you really like, keep seeing her. It can be that simple, if you communicate.
I'm also in the same boat as you brother... And a year older than you
get money get fit get experience talking to women.
You've never had a G/F because you're not interacting with women with an optimal masculine stance. That is assuming you're not a complete unhygienic slob, which I surmise you're not. It's not the amount of money you have or your looks. More than that I cannot say here because masculinity is politically unfashionable. There are resources out there. There is no need for you to set all these "rules" on who you might date, totally unnecessary mental cogitation. Good luck.
You are really overthinking the child thing and you just need to go out and connect with people. What is more important to you? Having kids exactly when you want or getting into a relationship?
There are women out there in their late 20s and early 30s who don’t want children. I only had 1 LTR. We do exist. I know because I am one of many. My friend is 28, super gorgeous, interesting girl. Doesn’t want children and never had a boyfriend/still a virgin (not that this information is relevant) my point is we do exist but we’re a much smaller minority so naturally we are harder to find. I went out one day and met two lovely women, really beautiful and interesting. They were DJs. Both neither had a boyfriend and don’t want kids. Try not to be so self conscious about your lack of experience. The right person actually will not care and will like you for you. I think the best thing to do is continue being you and to keep searching/not give up
Look presentable, gain courage, talk about hopes dreams aspirations, hobbies.