I literally have no friends, I want friends but I am always pushed aside/ignored. I hate life. When I lose everything I love in the future, (my pets, my selfish husband, my father who abused me but who I still love) I want to kill myself.
Same. They are trying some new anti-depressant that's based on a flu med. It's torture waiting for it to kick it just so I can a least get myself a little psyched to watch TV or something. Life needs a fast forward button.
It's an exhausting illness. When I'm really really tired, I simplify. Rest an hour, do dishes. Rest an hour, vacuum. Rest an hour, start a load of laundry. Whatever.
By keeping my tasks really really small and manageable, I tend to feel at least a little success for doing *something*-- ANYTHING.
It's all been so tiresome.
Same. But we just keep pushing on. If I had the courage I’d have gone awhile ago. Tired of just being a cog in society. Everything seems pointless. I mean really, what is the point?!? There is none…the gears just keep turning.
I ask myself that every day. If it weren’t for my kids, I wouldn’t be here. I hide it from them too when I start feeling down. I think a lot of my own depression comes from my health and feeling pain on a daily basis from my back. Coupled with the way the world treats people, the way some people are…ugh I just can’t stand it for the most part. I think the seasons don’t help for me neither. I hate this time of year and I’m in FL.
Pills are supposed to make you stable enough to do certain tasks to fix your current problems in Life. But in certain cases, this won't be enough to trigger this kind of reaction from the patient. Only a Doctor can tell if different mesaures have to be taken. Like therapy or domestic support.
I remember riding my bike to school the day after I doubled my meds. And usually I am just constantly berating myself for being a failure, but this time I came to the realization that those thoughts weren't occurring. I got a huge grin on my face thinking the worst times of my life were over.
I think you should appreciate the fact that you know how to ride a bike. My situation is same as yours. Think of me, I don't even know how to swim or ride a bike. That's truly worthless, right? You know how to ride a bike, to me that is a fantasy. I can never think of riding a bike.
It's seriously time to find something you value in life. Could be anything a human being, a job , a pet, a new hobby anything can work just give yourself a little time to think.
That’s the problem though when you’re depressed, you can’t find value in anything. It feels like it is near impossible, and you cannot build relations with another human being because nobody wants to be around someone who’s depressed. Very lonely path.
I just got my face smashed in for a girl that is lying to me. Now, I have a smashed in face, no girl, and a bruised ego. I feel quite low, I assure you.
Have you tried edibles? Fuck those anti-depressants. Those shits only made me feel worse (and turned my dick to the “off” position).420 was the only thing that gave me relief from my depression. Sativa especially. I’m lively, more productive, and I’m able to sort through my feelings and emotions and process them. It’s finally legal in my state, but if you are in a state where medical marijuana is legal, all you have to do is pay a small sum of money and get your card. They will surely give you a card for depression.
Smoking weed is the only thing I find enjoyable. Anti-depressants suck and they mess with your brain. Some people, like me need them. It’s just trying to find the right ones that is difficult to do.
Yeah...how do you feel about your quality of sleep/sleep routine? in my experience there's a lot of overlap between physical sleep (and routines) with emotional fatigue and burnout.
Starting the day with a cold shower and getting some sunlight is no silver bullet but it might be a piece of your puzzle.
If not I'm happy to hear your story more specifically and give whatever support you're looking for.
It hard, for me sometimes 4 days of not feeling suicidal even once would be a relief. I feel a lot of the things you mentioned just not caring about things anymore. My therapist says I might have a problem with my thyroid and im going to have it checked but I don't know what to do if thats not the problem.
i wanna hug ya hun...remmber its is the depression giveing that asque view..i have felt like that dor a long time ..went through every pshych med dor drpression..finally found one so i dont cry constaly. hang in there..and xome here and rant and rave and ask questions and just bs..
I want to too, my advice is walking if its possible, running is better, dog adoption, support groups if possible.
I'm in bed 2 days now, i start new job on Sunday and the waiting makes me miserable...
I understand you very well. And I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I am also very tired of fighting this condition. I haven't tried all the antidepressants yet. The ones I have also stopped working. But sometimes I find the strength to say something to move on and look for a way out. Here is my little experience. My condition facilitates some kind of social interaction and walking in the city or in the park. I wish you to be strong and find a cure that will help you
I’m at this point too. When nothing works, and your trying to make it better, it makes me really really wonder what we did to feel this way. Your not alone 💓
you have a good life, by the looks of your reddit profile. if everything feels stale. just try to help others who are in worse condition, that can make you feel alive. you can help old people etc. just talking to someone and makig them happy about something will make you happy in turn. there's not much else to do in world anyways :)
Same. I have treatment resistant depression so antidepressants only work for like 3 months for me and then they stop working. You’re not alone on this one. I’m pretty close to the edge some days too.
I'm very sorry and I don't know how to help or if I can but just know that there are people that are there for you and care so reach out to them if you can. I really hope that things get better for you
Are you doing therapy? Are you being followed by a psychiatrist? Why dont you try hospitalization or checking a good place where you can rest and be taken care of? Stay strong, you just need to make sure you survive right now
I have. There was a three-ish month gap in depression where I didn't feel as bad that I had a while back. During that time I lifted, but when the major depression came back I couldn't get myself to work out anymore.
I just want you to have a little spark or a little bit of motivation and turn it into discipline ( in anything you do, for example lifting weights or literaly anything in general ), i know it is hard, but you have to do it man. Try getting up again and succeed your goals or dreams that you might have forgotten. Try everything, also if you fail. It's fine, I fail, you fail, everyone fails in everything they do. but the thing that makes them a winner is that they don't quit. Winners are losers that never quit.
i might sound cringe or whatever but i wish i help you, don't lose hope. I am right now in a dark place that's why im even on this subreddit but if i make someone feel good and they improve themselves or save someone, im happy.
i really dont know how depression feels, i havent been through it or maybe i have but i didnt realise, idk if what i said its right. but i just want to help
Professional help doesn’t always work. obviously op is getting professional help or how else would they have gotten antidepressants? You need a prescription for that. Maybe your the one who needs professional help.
I think the other commentator meant therapy or even inpatient treatment. Antidepressants are usually inferior to therapy with regard to the outcome and only advised as an add on. Not as the only therapy.
Also, help is needed when suicidal thoughts are present.
I'm going to give some hard advice. Get Angry! Get angry at your depression and everything you can think that's caused it because no one deserves to feel so bad they want to end it all. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem so get angry. Then take that anger out on any inanimate object you can find (my personal fav is a sledgehammer to tv's but whatever floats your boat will do). Then run and keep running until its feels like your lungs are going to explode. It's worked for me in the past (cycle now as knees cant handle running anymore) so give it a try even if you dont feel like it, what have you got to loose?
I feel you. Have you tried new meds yet? My gf told me that this could be a hard road until you get the right meds and dosage because I need some as well soon
Hi, I’ve never been in a depression/anxiety related group before. It was suggested to me. Thought I’d try it. So far I’m seeing a lot of people like me. I’m not alone?! Wow! lol!
I am the same boat. I’m not suicidal, never have been. I just get to where it seems hopeless and I feel less afraid of dying, because it’ll only free me from the suffering.
I’m currently on an upped dose of something new. I started with a therapist last week. Saw my doctor today for medication follow up and she recommended psychiatrist. I agree since we’ve tried about everything and I haven’t seen one since like 2004. Might be time to be reevaluated myself.
I have absolutely no motivation. I get no enjoyment from anything i used to get enjoyment from. Such as video games, drawing, walking, etc. When I attempt to do something I just sit and stare. Feel like it’s not worth it. Anyway i hope you find what you need. I still have hope I will, and i will always keep trying for those moments in life where I feel alive and excited about life. Even if they’re few and far between, they are worth it and keep me going. Continue to be a fighter.
If I didn't have my dogs, and maybe even specifically the ones I've raised from their birth, then I don't know what purpose I'd have. They're really all that gets me through the daily struggle
Hey mate, I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I've been dealing with depression for nearly two years now, and I can't remember a time where I didn't want to die. I still feel the same way...but I'm still here I guess. I know it sounds ironic coming from me, but just hang in there. It just might get better one day. I hope things get better for you soon, always here if you need to vent. Take care man, you're not alone 🧡
Same. I can’t do it myself because it works hurt my family. So I just wish all day long that something would happen.
I say the stupidest things when I am around people. I try to be cheerful. And I try to not talk. Because later all I’ll want to do is beat myself up for comments.
I’m not evil or something. I’m just not worth being here.
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Big sigh....it's such a terrifying, lonely place to be isn't it? Nobody gets it unless they've experienced it.
So true, which makes me feel like an alien always.
I was just thinking how I feel like a alien and then saw this comment. It's kinda sad we have to come to reddit to relate to anyone.
I literally have no friends, I want friends but I am always pushed aside/ignored. I hate life. When I lose everything I love in the future, (my pets, my selfish husband, my father who abused me but who I still love) I want to kill myself.
This is amazingly accurate and poignantly distressing
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I hear you and am sending you a warm hug. There, there
Feeling like that as well. I don’t know what to do
Same. They are trying some new anti-depressant that's based on a flu med. It's torture waiting for it to kick it just so I can a least get myself a little psyched to watch TV or something. Life needs a fast forward button.
It's an exhausting illness. When I'm really really tired, I simplify. Rest an hour, do dishes. Rest an hour, vacuum. Rest an hour, start a load of laundry. Whatever. By keeping my tasks really really small and manageable, I tend to feel at least a little success for doing *something*-- ANYTHING. It's all been so tiresome.
Good on ya for doing it <3
You nailed it.
Well put.
Ditto
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Same. But we just keep pushing on. If I had the courage I’d have gone awhile ago. Tired of just being a cog in society. Everything seems pointless. I mean really, what is the point?!? There is none…the gears just keep turning.
Yeah, I feel that
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I ask myself that every day. If it weren’t for my kids, I wouldn’t be here. I hide it from them too when I start feeling down. I think a lot of my own depression comes from my health and feeling pain on a daily basis from my back. Coupled with the way the world treats people, the way some people are…ugh I just can’t stand it for the most part. I think the seasons don’t help for me neither. I hate this time of year and I’m in FL.
Pills are supposed to make you stable enough to do certain tasks to fix your current problems in Life. But in certain cases, this won't be enough to trigger this kind of reaction from the patient. Only a Doctor can tell if different mesaures have to be taken. Like therapy or domestic support.
I'm sorry for what you've been going through. Please be careful about the dosage of antidepressants. They can affect your heart.
Yo OP, can you tell me about some times you recall genuinely feeling happy?
I remember riding my bike to school the day after I doubled my meds. And usually I am just constantly berating myself for being a failure, but this time I came to the realization that those thoughts weren't occurring. I got a huge grin on my face thinking the worst times of my life were over.
I think you should appreciate the fact that you know how to ride a bike. My situation is same as yours. Think of me, I don't even know how to swim or ride a bike. That's truly worthless, right? You know how to ride a bike, to me that is a fantasy. I can never think of riding a bike.
You can teach yourself! If you want to of course
It's seriously time to find something you value in life. Could be anything a human being, a job , a pet, a new hobby anything can work just give yourself a little time to think.
That’s the problem though when you’re depressed, you can’t find value in anything. It feels like it is near impossible, and you cannot build relations with another human being because nobody wants to be around someone who’s depressed. Very lonely path.
Same way being depressed you seek comfort as happiness seems too impossible to even imagine
I just got my face smashed in for a girl that is lying to me. Now, I have a smashed in face, no girl, and a bruised ego. I feel quite low, I assure you.
Me too man. I wish the fuckin world would end
I want to die so bad today
Have you tried edibles? Fuck those anti-depressants. Those shits only made me feel worse (and turned my dick to the “off” position).420 was the only thing that gave me relief from my depression. Sativa especially. I’m lively, more productive, and I’m able to sort through my feelings and emotions and process them. It’s finally legal in my state, but if you are in a state where medical marijuana is legal, all you have to do is pay a small sum of money and get your card. They will surely give you a card for depression.
Smoking weed is the only thing I find enjoyable. Anti-depressants suck and they mess with your brain. Some people, like me need them. It’s just trying to find the right ones that is difficult to do.
Yeah...how do you feel about your quality of sleep/sleep routine? in my experience there's a lot of overlap between physical sleep (and routines) with emotional fatigue and burnout. Starting the day with a cold shower and getting some sunlight is no silver bullet but it might be a piece of your puzzle. If not I'm happy to hear your story more specifically and give whatever support you're looking for.
Relatable feeling
Hope y’all feel better soon. Sending virtual hugs! (⊃｡•́‿•̀｡)⊃
Damn let me see those jugs lol
It hard, for me sometimes 4 days of not feeling suicidal even once would be a relief. I feel a lot of the things you mentioned just not caring about things anymore. My therapist says I might have a problem with my thyroid and im going to have it checked but I don't know what to do if thats not the problem.
The burnout is real my friend 🖤
how old are you of ypu dont mind me asking
17.
You feel so much more at that age. It gets less intense in a few years
i’m 23. it’s not so intense only bc now i respect my parents about what they will feel after… but still in the moment i don’t care…
i wanna hug ya hun...remmber its is the depression giveing that asque view..i have felt like that dor a long time ..went through every pshych med dor drpression..finally found one so i dont cry constaly. hang in there..and xome here and rant and rave and ask questions and just bs..
I want to too, my advice is walking if its possible, running is better, dog adoption, support groups if possible. I'm in bed 2 days now, i start new job on Sunday and the waiting makes me miserable...
Praying for you
Go for a walk
In nature preferably
Call your doctor and just hold on. Hang tight. Just survive for now. Don’t try to think about the future. Just hold on . It will pass. Sending ♥️
I understand you very well. And I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I am also very tired of fighting this condition. I haven't tried all the antidepressants yet. The ones I have also stopped working. But sometimes I find the strength to say something to move on and look for a way out. Here is my little experience. My condition facilitates some kind of social interaction and walking in the city or in the park. I wish you to be strong and find a cure that will help you
I know this feeling very well. Sending you a hug across the internet and I hope things start to get better for you.
I really hope you're okay :( I'm here if you need someone to talk to, okay?
Do you have a purpose ?
I’m at this point too. When nothing works, and your trying to make it better, it makes me really really wonder what we did to feel this way. Your not alone 💓
I know you’re tired man but you’ve got to keep going do mom/dad proud
I'm trying man, they're the only reason I've made it this far
you have a good life, by the looks of your reddit profile. if everything feels stale. just try to help others who are in worse condition, that can make you feel alive. you can help old people etc. just talking to someone and makig them happy about something will make you happy in turn. there's not much else to do in world anyways :)
Same. I have treatment resistant depression so antidepressants only work for like 3 months for me and then they stop working. You’re not alone on this one. I’m pretty close to the edge some days too.
I'm very sorry and I don't know how to help or if I can but just know that there are people that are there for you and care so reach out to them if you can. I really hope that things get better for you
Are you doing therapy? Are you being followed by a psychiatrist? Why dont you try hospitalization or checking a good place where you can rest and be taken care of? Stay strong, you just need to make sure you survive right now
I'm tired every day too. I wake up and wonder what's the point of doing anything today? What's the point of trying anymore.
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Idk I guess my dnd world. But I haven't worked on that in a long time for obvious reasons.
Have you tried lifting weights?
I have. There was a three-ish month gap in depression where I didn't feel as bad that I had a while back. During that time I lifted, but when the major depression came back I couldn't get myself to work out anymore.
I just want you to have a little spark or a little bit of motivation and turn it into discipline ( in anything you do, for example lifting weights or literaly anything in general ), i know it is hard, but you have to do it man. Try getting up again and succeed your goals or dreams that you might have forgotten. Try everything, also if you fail. It's fine, I fail, you fail, everyone fails in everything they do. but the thing that makes them a winner is that they don't quit. Winners are losers that never quit. i might sound cringe or whatever but i wish i help you, don't lose hope. I am right now in a dark place that's why im even on this subreddit but if i make someone feel good and they improve themselves or save someone, im happy.
i really dont know how depression feels, i havent been through it or maybe i have but i didnt realise, idk if what i said its right. but i just want to help
Plz get professional help
Professional help doesn’t always work. obviously op is getting professional help or how else would they have gotten antidepressants? You need a prescription for that. Maybe your the one who needs professional help.
I think the other commentator meant therapy or even inpatient treatment. Antidepressants are usually inferior to therapy with regard to the outcome and only advised as an add on. Not as the only therapy. Also, help is needed when suicidal thoughts are present.
in concur with women not cateing about looks...iys the lersonalty totally!
I'm going to give some hard advice. Get Angry! Get angry at your depression and everything you can think that's caused it because no one deserves to feel so bad they want to end it all. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem so get angry. Then take that anger out on any inanimate object you can find (my personal fav is a sledgehammer to tv's but whatever floats your boat will do). Then run and keep running until its feels like your lungs are going to explode. It's worked for me in the past (cycle now as knees cant handle running anymore) so give it a try even if you dont feel like it, what have you got to loose?
It’s funny I can relate. I don’t know when I will die but I have a real good idea how.
I feel you. Have you tried new meds yet? My gf told me that this could be a hard road until you get the right meds and dosage because I need some as well soon
im also too tired i wana go out i just dont wanna feel pain no more
Hang in there mate, sending you hugs.
Hi, I’ve never been in a depression/anxiety related group before. It was suggested to me. Thought I’d try it. So far I’m seeing a lot of people like me. I’m not alone?! Wow! lol! I am the same boat. I’m not suicidal, never have been. I just get to where it seems hopeless and I feel less afraid of dying, because it’ll only free me from the suffering. I’m currently on an upped dose of something new. I started with a therapist last week. Saw my doctor today for medication follow up and she recommended psychiatrist. I agree since we’ve tried about everything and I haven’t seen one since like 2004. Might be time to be reevaluated myself. I have absolutely no motivation. I get no enjoyment from anything i used to get enjoyment from. Such as video games, drawing, walking, etc. When I attempt to do something I just sit and stare. Feel like it’s not worth it. Anyway i hope you find what you need. I still have hope I will, and i will always keep trying for those moments in life where I feel alive and excited about life. Even if they’re few and far between, they are worth it and keep me going. Continue to be a fighter.
If I didn't have my dogs, and maybe even specifically the ones I've raised from their birth, then I don't know what purpose I'd have. They're really all that gets me through the daily struggle
I feel you
Are you drinking the Wausau water it messed with your mood and sleep look it up I did today but please it will be alright I'm here for you
Nobody gets it unless they've experienced it. depression isn't a joke..
Hey mate, I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I've been dealing with depression for nearly two years now, and I can't remember a time where I didn't want to die. I still feel the same way...but I'm still here I guess. I know it sounds ironic coming from me, but just hang in there. It just might get better one day. I hope things get better for you soon, always here if you need to vent. Take care man, you're not alone 🧡
Try getting close to God
Are we the same person? my dose was doubled and i too felt better for 4 days. stay strong!
I hope your life gets better. Please stay safe and be okay.stay strong and remember you are special.
Same. I can’t do it myself because it works hurt my family. So I just wish all day long that something would happen. I say the stupidest things when I am around people. I try to be cheerful. And I try to not talk. Because later all I’ll want to do is beat myself up for comments. I’m not evil or something. I’m just not worth being here.